Langston, Why You Always Whinin’?: Motherf*ckin Mini Episode

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Langston, Why You Always Whinin’?: Motherf*ckin Mini Episode"

Podcast Information:

• Title: My Momma Told Me
• Host/Author: Big Money Players Network and iHeartPodcasts
• Episode: Langston, Why You Always Whinin’?: Motherf*ckin Mini Episode
• Release Date: April 3, 2025
• Description: Comedians Langston Kerman and David Borey explore Black conspiracy theories with humor and insight, tackling everything from lighthearted myths to more serious societal issues.

---

Introduction

In the "Motherf*ckin Mini Episode" of My Momma Told Me, hosts Langston Kerman and David Borey engage in a candid and comedic conversation addressing listener feedback, particularly focusing on critiques related to their humor about skin tone and colorism. This episode delves deep into the dynamics of comedy within the Black community, exploring sensitive topics with a blend of humor and introspection.

Key Discussions and Insights

1. Black Conspiracy Theories: The Lil Wayne Hair Saga ([02:13] - [04:59])

The episode kicks off with a humorous take on conspiracy theories within the Black community. Langston Kerman and David Borey discuss the peculiar case of Lil Wayne's hair maintenance, questioning who has been responsible for his distinctive braids:

• Langston Kerman [03:03]: “His dreads had snapped off, I would say, a decade ago. And he's never, like, made any adjustments. Do you know what I mean?”

• David Borey [03:25]: “I think you can outrich a haircut, too. Like, till you get so rich, you don't really need a good haircut.”

They humorously speculate whether Lil Wayne's refusal to change his hairstyle is a deliberate statement of wealth and individuality or a result of deeper conspiratorial motives.

2. Listener Feedback: Addressing Voicemails and Criticisms ([05:21] - [15:02])

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to addressing listener voicemails. The first voicemail from David Borey criticizes Langston for making jokes about dark skin tones, sparking a heated yet humorous debate between the hosts:

• David Borey [05:48]: “Pee Wee Herman only bought Dave on the show so he can make more dark skinned jokes.”

• Langston Kerman [08:38]: “I definitely think I take way more hits for being light skinned than the other way around.”

Langston clarifies his stance, emphasizing that his intention is not to defend any skin tone but to challenge unfounded stereotypes:

• Langston Kerman [12:02]: “I think that the further I get into conspiracy theory, the more I'm not fully convinced races are supposed to mix. I don't know that this isn't a sin, but I'm grateful to be here. I love who I am despite the curse that I'm born of.”

This segment highlights the delicate balance comedians must maintain when addressing sensitive topics, showcasing their commitment to authenticity while navigating audience expectations.

3. Colorism and Comedy: Navigating Sensitive Topics ([16:27] - [20:13])

The conversation extends to the broader issue of colorism within the Black community and its impact on comedy. Langston and David discuss how jokes about skin tone can reflect deeper societal biases:

• Langston Kerman [19:24]: “I become beta so fast when it becomes like, man, competing about how much pussy they ate and how strong they are.”

They explore the challenges of making humor that resonates without perpetuating harmful stereotypes, advocating for a more inclusive and thoughtful approach to comedy.

4. Guest Dynamics and Show Preferences ([15:02] - [19:14])

Langston and David express their preferences for featuring female guests over male ones, citing comfort and the quality of conversations:

• Langston Kerman [17:15]: “We have a ton of women on the podcast and frankly, I think most of our best episodes are with women.”

• David Borey [17:51]: “What's the most amount of dudes you feel like you can be comfortable around? ... that's about enough.”

This insight into their guest selection process underscores their commitment to creating a diverse and engaging dialogue on the show.

5. Engaging the Community: Future Plans and Listener Interaction ([20:13] - [22:55])

Towards the end of the episode, Langston and David encourage listeners to engage with the podcast through social media, live shows, and voting for awards:

• Langston Kerman [21:38]: “We are nominated for a Webby. So please go and vote.”

They also highlight upcoming live performances, fostering a sense of community and encouraging listener participation.

Notable Quotes

• Langston Kerman [03:32]: “Jay Z was like, I'm never getting a haircut again. I'm so rich.”

• David Borey [07:00]: “He noticed when the show first started, you were kind of holding your punches and more defending light skin than making dark skinned jokes.”

• Langston Kerman [12:02]: “I think that I am born of a curse. I think that the further I get into conspiracy theory, the more I'm not fully convinced races are supposed to mix.”

Conclusions

In this mini-episode, Langston Kerman and David Borey adeptly navigate the complexities of comedy within the Black community, addressing critical issues like colorism and audience feedback with humor and honesty. Their willingness to confront sensitive topics head-on, while maintaining a comedic edge, offers listeners both laughter and thoughtful reflection. The episode underscores the importance of authenticity in comedy and the ongoing dialogue about representation and stereotypes.

---

For Those Who Haven’t Listened:

If you're new to My Momma Told Me, this episode serves as a compelling introduction to the hosts' dynamic, their commitment to exploring Black conspiracy theories, and their ability to tackle challenging topics with humor. Whether you're interested in insightful comedy or the intricacies of cultural discussions, this episode provides a rich and engaging experience.

Engage with the Show:

• Follow Langston Kerman on all social media platforms.
• Join Live Shows at locations like Wise Guys in Salt Lake City and Las Vegas.
• Vote for the Show in the Webby Awards.
• Subscribe and Review to support and spread the word about the podcast.

Transcript

[Ryan Seacrest]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Spring is in full swing, so take some time for self care this spring now through April 22, buy two self care items and save $2. Shop in store or online for self care essentials like Tom's Toothpaste Soft Soap, Liquid Hand Soap, Colgate Optic White Toothpaste and Colgate Total toothpaste and save $2 when you buy two participating items. Offer ends April 22. Promotions may vary. Restrictions apply. Visit albertsons or safeway.com for more details.

[Unknown (Cheap Caribbean Vacations)]

With the best All Inclusive Vacation Deals to Mexico and the Caribbean Booking your getaway with Cheap Caribbean Vacations means you have more freedom to do your deal. Whether you want to enjoy snorkeling, endless margaritas and more, or simply soak up the sun and sand in a tropical paradise, Cheap Caribbean Vacations has your deal for that plan and book the exact getaway you want at exactly the right price for you by using our exclusive budget Beach Finder. Or find a featured family friendly all inclusive package to to Dreams, Resorts and Spas and do your [e-mail] when you.

[Unknown (California Psychics)]

Haven'T found love, it can feel like everyone else has. It's in every movie, every song and all the PDA. Looking for love sucks. Thankfully, California Psychics can give you the guidance you need to find the one. We guarantee if your reading isn't life changing, it's free and new customers receive 20 minutes for just $20. Visit CaliforniaPsychics.com and experience the Jo Certainty.

[Ryan Seacrest]

California Psychics at Designer Shoe Warehouse we believe that shoes are an important part.

[Unknown (DSW)]

Of, well, everything from first steps to first dates, from all nighters to all time personal bests.

[Langston Kerman]

From building pillow forts to building a.

[Unknown (DSW)]

Life for all the big and small moments that make up your whole world. DSW is there and we've got just the shoes. Find a shoe for every you from brands you love at brag worthy prices at your DSW store or dsw.com.

[David Borey]

Motherfucking mini episode mini episode Motherfucking mini episode.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

My love is so soft so don't think I ain't hard bitch say wheezy make it rain. I say bitch I ain't God. Welcome little mamas and gentiles alike to another phenomenal episode of My Mama Told.

[Langston Kerman]

Me the podcast where we dive de deep into the pockets of black conspiracy.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Theories and we finally work to prove who has been braiding Wayne's hair this whole time. It can't be from the community.

[Langston Kerman]

Mm mm mm. This should be looking crazy you're saying. You're saying nobody would do Lil Wayne's there. Nobody. Nobody of African descent would do Lil Wayne's hair the way that it is now being done.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Who do you know who would fuck up that man's braids?

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. I mean, his dreads had snapped off, I would say, a decade ago. And he's never, like, made any adjustments. Do you know what I mean? It doesn't feel like he, like, oh, these snapped off. Maybe I should take on a new system. Maybe I need to try some different products. It just feels like he's continuing on the same path.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah, I think you can outrich a haircut, too. Like, till you get so rich, you don't really need a good haircut.

[Langston Kerman]

We see it a lot. J. Cole.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah. Tim Duncan. I think it's beautiful.

[Langston Kerman]

Jay Z did it. Jay Z was like, I'm never getting a haircut again. I'm so rich.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

How nice would it be to be free of every two weeks?

[Langston Kerman]

I do think. I do think it is sort of the more embarrassing thing that happens when a billionaire is still trapped in the same sort of, like, aesthetic standards that the rest of us are. Like, I know why I fix my hair in my face. It's because that shallowness is all I have. But when they do it, it feels like, okay, well, then what the fuck did you get rich for?

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah, to dress like us. What are you talking about?

[Langston Kerman]

You're a loser. Yeah, you're a real loser. I was thinking you should look insane.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

I was thinking that the other day. Cause I was in the barbershop, and they was going in on this dude, and it was like some shit that I knew it could get turned back at me for, so I couldn't even laugh too hard.

[Langston Kerman]

Oh, right, right, right.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

They were like, look at this nigga. Long ass arms, nigga arms. Long as hell. Short as short as fuck. I was like, this nigga is as short as me.

[Langston Kerman]

Y.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

So I just had to be like.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, we the same height. Go ahead. Take it easy, big man. Some people are average size in here.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

There are a lot of different bodies out there.

[Langston Kerman]

There's actually not one standard of beauty. But, hey, y'all fellas have fun for.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

You for copping to that European body standard. But we're not here. We're not here to talk about my insecurities at the barbershop. We have voicemails.

[Langston Kerman]

We have voicemails. You guys have been sending so many fucking voicemails. And it's really cool. And this first voicemail, bae, our Producer assures us is worth a listen. We were trusting that BAE is correct that this first. We've opted not to listen to them ahead of time. We really want to hear Raw Dog unscathed, unfiltered. And so we're gonna play it now. Yeah.

[David Borey]

Oh. Semi new listener product. About two months now. But I've been binging the out of this show.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay.

[David Borey]

And I notice, or my mama told me, that Langston, AKA Pee Wee Thurman.

[Unknown (California Psychics)]

Whoa.

[David Borey]

Only.

[Langston Kerman]

Hold on. Wait a minute, man. First of all, motherfucker, you just got here. You ain't even been with us that long to be speaking nasty to me.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yo, why?

[Langston Kerman]

What did I do? Why do you want to take shots at me?

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

They do be coming at you.

[Langston Kerman]

It's crazy. I'm so inspiring. I'm so uplifting. And all they do is speak. Speak rude.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

This is what drag in my direction. Shame, shame.

[Langston Kerman]

I just want the best for us, but all right. Yeah, play more of this garbage.

[David Borey]

Pee Wee Herman only bought Dave on the show so he can make more dark skinned jokes.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Damn.

[David Borey]

I noticed when the show first started, you were kind of holding your punches and more defending light skin than making dark skinned jokes. But now that that nigga's on the show, boy, you will call a blackie a blackie quick. I'm just saying. Conspiracy observation. Definitely love the show so far, fellas. Keep up the good work. Bye.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

What I love is that he said, you will call a blackie a blackie. He didn't say, and that's not true.

[Langston Kerman]

Or he was stupid. Yeah, he didn't. He didn't really stand up for you.

[Ryan Seacrest]

He just felt like.

[Langston Kerman]

It just felt like he identified a change and was like, I don't know what's happening, but you changed.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

It felt like if we let that email or that voicemail go on longer, it would have been like, and I'm for it. Honestly, take these niggas to task.

[Langston Kerman]

They've been too good for too long and finally somebody's ready to speak up.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

He didn't even say my name. He just said, that nigga, bro. He didn't say, bori, I appreciate your contribution.

[Langston Kerman]

Nah, he truly. He's been listening for two months. One thing he knows is that he can be mean to me. And the other thing he knows is that you've made zero imprint on this podcast. And more importantly, the only real influence you've had is you've become a punching bag for my dark skinned jokes.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Which is funny cause I feel like I go at you for being light skinned.

[Langston Kerman]

All the time, I was gonna say. And granted, I know this will be received poorly, it always is. But I definitely think I take way more hits for being light skinned than the other way around.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

I will say 100%. 100%.

[Langston Kerman]

Certainly. I get my shots in. There's been a few ooga boogas that I felt pretty good about.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

You know what it is? I think it's when you get your dark your shots in. I don't know what it is. Maybe this is colorism. It does ring louder, you know what I'm saying? Because I just get my little like, will you sing an R and B off? And then it's like. And then you're just like, what about you, you big lipped gorilla? And the record stops. Everybody's like, hey, hey. Oh.

[Langston Kerman]

Can I just say, perfect impression of me. I don't know what you've been doing, but you locked the fuck in as far as impersonating me.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Spring is in full swing, which means it's time for spring cleaning. Don't worry, we've got everything you need to stock up on spring cleaning essentials because a clean home is a happy home. Shop in store or online for spring cleaning favorites like Method All Purpose Cleaner, Swiffer Heavy Duty Mopping Cloths, Lysol Bathroom Cleaner, Scotch Brite Sponges and Clorox Disinfecting Wipes and Save. Offer ends April 22. Promotions may vary. Restrictions apply. Visit albertsons or safeway.com for more details.

[Unknown (Cheap Caribbean Vacations)]

With the best all inclusive vacation deals to Mexico and the Caribbean Booking your getaway with cheap Caribbean vacations means you have more freedom to do your deal. Whether you want to enjoy snorkeling, endless margaritas and more, or simply soak up the sun and sand in a tropical paradise, Cheap Caribbean Vacations has your deal for that. Plan and book the exact getaway you want at exactly the right price for you by using our exclusive budget Beach Finder. Or find a featured all inclusive package to REU Hotels and Resorts and do your [e-mail] when you haven't found love.

[Unknown (California Psychics)]

It can feel like everyone else has. It's in every movie, every song, and all the pda. Looking for love sucks. Thankfully, California Psychics can give you the guidance you need to find the one we guarantee if your reading isn't life changing, it's free and new customers receive 20 minutes for just $20. Visit californiapsychics.com and experience the joy of certainty.

[Ryan Reynolds]

California Psychics Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile with a message for everyone paying big wireless way too much. Please, for the love of everything good in this world, stop with Mint. You can get premium wireless for just $15 a month. Of course, if you enjoy overpaying. No judgments. But that's weird. Okay, one judgment anyway. Give it a try.

[Unknown (DSW)]

@Mintmobile.Com Switch upfront payment of $45 for 3 month plan equivalent to $15 per month Required intro rate first 3 months only, then full price plan options available, taxes and fees extra. See full [e-mail].

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Okay, I'm gonna, I'm gonna be honest. I don't listen to a ton of podcasts about comedy. I haven't heard a lot of the prior ones. Were you not. Were you not ever. It was, it was defensive light skin. That was, that was your. That was your kind of take.

[Langston Kerman]

I don't know that I've ever been defending light skin. Let me be clear about my position on light skin. I think that I am born of a curse. I think that. I think that the further I get into conspiracy theory, the more I'm not fully convinced races are supposed to mix. I don't know that this isn't a sin, but I'm grateful to be here. I love who I am despite the curse that I'm born of. And that said, I am not so much a defender of light skin as I am a defender of what I think is often nasty stereotypes about people that frankly are mostly unfounded. So I think there was a period where I was probably defending the sort of, you know, that the stereotypes were invalid. That said, I'm not sitting here being like a light skinned champion the way that I think a lot of people want me to be.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

I think that is maybe just the nature of being light skinned. Possibly that people are like, he must be. You know what I mean?

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. I mean, we talked about this more privately than on the podcast, but people are. People continue to be mad at us for, mainly me, for that there are no light skinned a list celebrities comment. They continue to be on fire about how absurd that suggestion is. And I still think what's not understood in the comment that I was making is that I'm not asking for more of us. I'm just identifying a difference in the way that we are received in Hollywood.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

And that's the funny thing, because I am, I am. I feel like, no God, no God, no God, no God, no. I'm talking about I am Team Darks. That's what I want. I think Ben Wallace is The greatest basketball player of all time.

[Langston Kerman]

Okay, well that's not. There were plenty of dark skinned dudes you could have went with and I loved him specifically.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

It was just that era.

[Langston Kerman]

He was a fun, that was a fun team for sure.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah. His hair was so crazy. He was so strong.

[Langston Kerman]

He was scary.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah, no, that is. Yeah. Because you don't. I think if you really, if you were to really tally it up, me being pro dark skinned is maybe more than you being pro light skinned.

[Langston Kerman]

100%.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

You've never called you a sin.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

No, no, no, no, no, no. Quite frankly I had to take six more.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, no, I'd like to, I'd like to stop this where I could wait.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Ok so this is interesting because we have never talked about this because I don't know how, how it happened that I got on here. Were you looking for. When you were looking because you could have got a woman.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Quite frankly for the career, maybe a better choice.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, no, yeah. I probably thought about very powerful women that I could have aligned myself with and quite frankly they were busy. You know what I mean? Yeah. And then I said, well, okay, well who's the funniest person okay, women. The women, the funny women I know didn't. Now who's the just funniest person I know? And your name immediately popped up.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

It would have been crazy if you had got another light skinned guy though.

[Langston Kerman]

That was ultimately a non starter for me was I cannot in good faith I could not run a podcast about black conspiracy theory. And it's me and another motherfucker that's the same color as me. It just feels like we're not going to be able to have the full breadth of the conversations, you know what I mean? In a way that helps everybody but.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

To answer this caller shit, hey man, my guy's just trying. He be getting ganged up on, on here, bro.

[Langston Kerman]

I just put my dukes up in swing, man. I'm not. These niggas are punching me overhand. I'm still fighting like the fucking twenties. I'm just trying my best. I'm just trying my best to survive getting jumped, baby. I, I ain't bring this man on to make dark skinned jokes, but I will continue to do that. And if, if that makes you happy, dear listener, then, then I'm pleased that you, you're here to join us.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah, I think that's a fair, I think that's the fairest takeaway we could have of this. And also no women.

[Langston Kerman]

No women.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

We got an email about that one time I feel like we have a lot of women on, but I think.

[Langston Kerman]

We have a ton of women on the podcast and frankly, I think most of our best episodes are with women. Yeah, I, I don't think either of us is running from consistently having women on. In fact, frankly, it's my preference.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

Most of the time I feel uncomfortable is with. With a bunch of dudes sitting around making weird, you know, pee pee jokes.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah. What's the most amount of dudes you feel like you can be comfortable around?

[Langston Kerman]

That's a good question. It never happens.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Cause you got single mom tendencies too. Like, I got that.

[Langston Kerman]

So I just prefer women, dog. I really don't love like being in groups of men like that. I could probably do like up to 8.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

That's pretty good.

[Langston Kerman]

And then it's like I can't really. You know what I mean? When I was hooping, that was different. When you're like playing sports, it's a little more like you are not so much man as you are athlete. Joined in. Sort of a process, but just chilling. Yeah. I can't exceed like five to eight dudes.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah. Just like in a group. Yeah, that's true. Because like the other day I had like three dudes at my house. We were just on the porch and my girl walked up and I was like, yeah, that's about the breath of fresh air we needed. Yeah, that's about, that's about enough.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. This conversation was thinning out.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah. I'm going to start trying to talk about feelings, all of us, because it's like, it's like too many men will expose you for having single mom traits. One on one, great with men. Two, three men. I got it. It's like 12 niggas in there, bro.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah. Once it starts turning into like competitive male energy, I. I immediately sink to the bag.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah. I ain't got it. I ain't got it.

[Langston Kerman]

I become beta so fast when it becomes like, man, competing about how much pussy they ate and how strong they are.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

It's like, that's how I know that you do because you said how much pussy they ate.

[Langston Kerman]

Oh, yeah. It's never even occurred to me that they're not. They're not treating those nice ladies the way they deserve to be treated.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Well, you pussy though, right?

[Langston Kerman]

But you made her come for sure though, right?

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah. You made sure she felt safe afterwards though, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Langston Kerman]

You got yours, but I'm sure she got hers.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah, yeah. You text her the next morning. So it's pretty fun. I appreciate that. Right.

[Langston Kerman]

Well, for the listener as we need to wrap this thing up. I hope this answers your question with your black ass. And I hope that you continue to enjoy what we're putting out. I'm glad you're here. Keep bringing more people on. Two months is crazy. We've been at it for a long time. So it's so nice to know that more people are finding us in discovery, suffering, and becoming addicted to this bullshit.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah, I appreciate it. Thank you. Maybe you could say by name next time.

[Langston Kerman]

Yeah, his name's David.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah. Maybe just reference it. Bori goes good. I like Bory.

[Langston Kerman]

Bori's nice.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

But other than that.

[Langston Kerman]

You want to tell the people where they can find you what cool shit you got going on.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Yeah, cool guy jokes. 87 on Instagram patreon.com davidbory to buy my special Birth of a Nation with the G. Also Dallas. I will be in Dallas April 25th and 26th. Come out and see me. It's going to be a good time at the Dallas Comedy Club. I mean, I'm also going to be at. I'm going to be at the West River Comedy Club in Rapid City, South Dakota this weekend. If people who listen to this are there, I would appreciate that as well.

[Langston Kerman]

West river, baby.

[Unknown (My Mama Told Me Podcast)]

Come on, come on. Act like I ain't just getting nominated for a Webby.

[Langston Kerman]

We on that Webby shit. That's right. We are nominated for a Webby. So please go and vote. I believe voting is open. You can vote for our episode with Monet exchange for the Webby Awards. We don't know what happens if we win the Webby Award, but we start. We're not fighting it. If you guys want to make us champions of the Webbies, and as always, you can follow me at Langston German on all social media platforms. You can come see me live. I'll be at Wise Guys in Salt Lake City April 10, and then April 17, I'll be at the Wise Guys in Las Vegas. And you can send us your own drops, your own conspiracy theories. You can tell us exactly what the ratio is of dark skin to light skin jokes on this [e-mail] you can leave us a voicemail at 844-low-Moms. And most importantly, you can buy the merch. You can like subscribe, rate, review, do all the things that help make this show more popular so that my dark skinned jokes finally see the light of day they deserve. Do it all in Jesus name. Bye, bitch. You like teenage girls? When you say teenage, how are we talking.

[David Borey]

Motherfucking mini episodes Mini Episode Mini Episode Mini Episode.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest For Albertsons and Safeway, Spring is in full swing, so take some time for self care this spring now through April 22, buy two self care items and save $2. Shop in store or online for self care essentials like Tom's Toothpaste Soft Soap, Liquid Hand Soap, Colgate Optic White Toothpaste and Colgate Total toothpaste and save $2 when you buy two participating items. Offer ends April 22. Promotions may vary. Restrictions apply. Visit albertsons or safeway.com for more details.

[Unknown (Cheap Caribbean Vacations)]

With the best All Inclusive Vacation Deals to Mexico and the Caribbean Booking your getaway with Cheap Caribbean Vacations means you have more freedom to do your deal. Whether you want to enjoy snorkeling, endless margaritas and more, or simply soak up the sun and sand in a tropical paradise, Cheap Caribbean Vacations has your deal for that. Plan and book the exact getaway you want at exactly the right price for you by using our exclusive budget Beach Finder. Or find a featured family friendly all inclusive package to Dreams, resorts and spas and do your [e-mail] when you haven't.

[Unknown (California Psychics)]

Found love, it can feel like everyone else has. It's in every movie, every song, and all the PDA looking for love sucks. Thankfully, California Psychics can give you the guidance you need to find the one we guarantee if your reading isn't life changing, it's free and new customers receive 20 minutes for just $20. Visit CaliforniaPsychics.com and experience the joy of certainty.

[David Borey]

California Psychics Amazon One Medical presents Painful.

[Langston Kerman]

Thoughts do they ever actually clean the.

[Unknown (Cheap Caribbean Vacations)]

Ball pit at these kids play gyms?

[Langston Kerman]

Or is my kid just swimming in a vat of bacteria, catching whatever cootie of the day is breeding in there?

[Unknown (Cheap Caribbean Vacations)]

A cootie that'll probably take down our whole family.

[David Borey]

Luckily, with Amazon One Medical 24. 7 Virtual Care, you can get checked out for whatever ball pittitis you've contracted. Amazon One Medical Healthcare just got less painful.