Podcast Summary: "The Marathon Mindset on Life and Rejection with Phoebe Robinson"

Podcast Information:

• Title: My So-Called Midlife with Reshma Saujani
• Host/Author: Lemonada Media
• Episode: The Marathon Mindset on Life and Rejection with Phoebe Robinson
• Release Date: March 19, 2025

Introduction: Embracing Midlife Challenges

In this episode of My So-Called Midlife, host Reshma Saujani explores the nuanced experiences of midlife through the lens of marathon running. She introduces the theme by sharing her own transformative journey of running her first marathon in 2007, a decision driven by a challenging personal breakup. Reshma uses this experience as a metaphor for life's broader struggles and triumphs, setting the stage for an enlightening conversation with guest Phoebe Robinson.

Reshma Sajani [01:17]: "the race was a true reflection of life."

Phoebe Robinson's Journey with Marathon Running

Phoebe Robinson, a celebrated comedian, writer, and actress, delves into her personal relationship with marathon running. Similar to Reshma, Phoebe began running marathons as a way to cope with emotional turmoil—in her case, following a difficult breakup. She explains how the discipline and structure of training provided her with a sense of control and purpose during a tumultuous period.

Phoebe Robinson [12:14]: "I was just sort of like, well okay, let's get to know this new Phoebe."

Phoebe discusses the physical and mental challenges of marathon training, including dealing with injuries like shin splints and the psychological battle of pushing through pain. These experiences, she emphasizes, taught her resilience and the importance of perseverance, both in running and in navigating life's setbacks.

Reshma's Personal Reflections and the Power of Presence

Reshma shares a poignant recollection of her marathon experience, highlighting the dual nature of the race as both brutal and beautifying. She describes the first 16 miles as exhilarating, filled with the energy of cheering crowds and the thrill of the city's scenery. However, as she approached mile 17, an unexpected physical and mental wall emerged.

Reshma Sajani [06:56]: "I knew if I got through the pain, then for the rest of my life's journey, I could get through anything."

In a heartfelt moment, Reshma reads an email she sent to friends after completing the marathon, reflecting on how that race mirrored the broader journey of life. The experience underscored the importance of being present and pushing through adversity to achieve personal growth.

Midlife Mindset: Prioritizing Self and Releasing Old Habits

The conversation shifts to the varying perspectives on midlife. Reshma introduces Beth, who shares her recent transition into her 40s and the shift in her mindset over the past six months. Beth discusses moving away from being a workaholic to prioritizing personal relationships, self-care, and overall well-being.

Beth [07:19]: "I feel like this is the most I've ever liked myself. I'm really getting to know myself in a way."
Beth [08:38]: "I feel like I'm coming out of the locker room. And it's third quarter, I'm like, all right, let's go on a run."

Beth elaborates on shedding the "poor girl brain"—a term coined during therapy to describe relentless hustle driven by financial necessity. Achieving financial stability allowed her to let go of the compulsion to overwork, fostering a healthier, more sustainable approach to life and career.

Overcoming Rejection and Embracing Failure

Phoebe Robinson opens up about her struggles with rejection and how marathon running has helped her reframe failure. She recounts an instance during a marathon when she faced severe physical strain but drew strength from past experiences to persevere.

Phoebe Robinson [20:14]: "if something doesn't happen that I want to happen career-wise, don't let it break me for like a week."

Phoebe emphasizes the metaphor of running a marathon as a lesson in resilience. Just as she had to push through the pain in the race, she applies the same determination to overcome professional and personal setbacks, viewing each challenge as an opportunity for growth.

Career Transitions and Representation in Publishing

Beth transitions the discussion to her career in the publishing industry, detailing the challenges faced as a Black woman in a predominantly white, male-dominated field. She shares her experiences of getting her first book published, encountering rejection based on racial biases rather than the quality of her work.

Beth [34:08]: "people were telling him, nobody wants to read a book written by a black woman. This isn't relatable. It won't sell."

In response, Beth founded an imprint aimed at providing a platform for diverse voices, ensuring that writers of color could share their unique stories without facing discriminatory rejections. She underscores the importance of representation and the richness it brings to literature.

Beth [35:33]: "We want to fall in love. We want to break the law, you know, in an escapist way. We have families too, so we have all these stories and these rich tapestries that we want to share."

Embracing Authenticity and Letting Go of Perfection

Phoebe and Beth discuss the significance of embracing one's true self without the pressure of perfectionism. Phoebe reflects on shedding the need to prove herself, advocating for women—particularly women of color—to own their worth and not diminish their presence to make others comfortable.

Phoebe Robinson [39:44]: "We gotta stop trying to shrink ourselves to make everybody else more comfortable. Like, I'm gonna put my fabulousness in your face, right, and make you deal with it."

Beth concurs, highlighting the necessity of allowing oneself to be imperfect in new endeavors. She encourages embracing mistakes as part of the growth process, whether it's learning a new skill or pursuing a passion project.

Beth [48:50]: "You just have to accept that, like not being great at something, it's going to be a big part of it for quite some time."

Conclusion: Building a Resilient and Fulfilling Life

The episode culminates with Reshma, Phoebe, and Beth reinforcing the central theme of resilience. They advocate for adopting a marathon mindset—persevering through challenges, embracing failures as learning opportunities, and prioritizing personal well-being over relentless hustle.

Phoebe Robinson [41:55]: "You don't have time and we need time to rest, to recover, to laugh, to heal."

Reshma encourages listeners to find their own "mile 17" moments—those pivotal instances where pushing through discomfort leads to profound personal growth.

Reshma Sajani [24:25]: "just don't give up."

Notable Quotes:

• Reshma Sajani [01:17]: "the race was a true reflection of life."
• Phoebe Robinson [20:14]: "if something doesn't happen that I want to happen career-wise, don't let it break me for like a week."
• Phoebe Robinson [39:44]: "We gotta stop trying to shrink ourselves to make everybody else more comfortable. Like, I'm gonna put my fabulousness in your face, right, and make you deal with it."

Key Takeaways:

• Marathon as Metaphor: Enduring physical and mental challenges in a marathon parallels life's broader struggles, teaching resilience and presence.
• Midlife Reflection: Transitioning into midlife offers opportunities to reassess priorities, balance career and personal life, and embrace self-growth.
• Overcoming Rejection: Viewing rejection through the lens of marathon training helps reframe failures as stepping stones rather than setbacks.
• Representation Matters: Creating platforms for diverse voices in industries like publishing is crucial for a richer, more inclusive narrative landscape.
• Authenticity Over Perfection: Embracing one's true self and imperfections fosters personal fulfillment and sustainable success.

This episode serves as an inspiring guide for listeners navigating midlife challenges, encouraging them to adopt a resilient mindset, prioritize personal well-being, and celebrate their unique journeys.