Carissa Weiser (12:00)

Homemade dinners are the best. But how can we do that when we're short on time and inspiration and ingredients?

Jason Weiser (12:06)

Our new solution is Dinnerly. That's right. This podcast is sponsored by Dinnerly. Dinnerly is the most affordable meal kit we've ever stumbled upon. With meals as low as $2.99 per meal. It's incredible. And with our Code Legends, you can get up to 27 free meals.

Carissa Weiser (12:21)

With Dinnerly, we choose from over 100 dishes each week. From steak dinners to oven roasted salmon, even takeout dupes. I love having options, don't you?

Jason Weiser (12:29)

I'm getting hungry already.

Carissa Weiser (12:31)

My favorite meal this week was pan roasted steak with roasted Brussels sprouts. Perfect medium with a little salt and pepper. Then this Thai sweet chili sauce on the veg.

Jason Weiser (12:40)

No leftovers. It was sad, but also, you know, great.

Carissa Weiser (12:43)

Which got me thinking. What if we could use Dinnerly for holiday hosting this year?

Jason Weiser (12:47)

Can we?

Carissa Weiser (12:48)

We in addition to day to day meals, Dinnerly has larger options that serve a crowd like holiday brunch boards, herb sausage stuffing, holiday lights, gingerbread cookies. That sounds great. And you can customize recipes too. Swap a low carb side, change your protein or make it vegetarian.

Jason Weiser (13:03)

Dinnerly is the only meal kit with gluten free customizations too.

Carissa Weiser (13:07)

That's right. It's flexible for families big or small and it's budget friendly.

Jason Weiser (13:10)

I love all these things. So this holiday season give the gift of great affordable food with dinnerly. Head to dinnerly.com offer legends and use code legends for up to 27 free meals. Once again, that's dinnerlead.com offer legends for up to 27 free meals and make sure you use my promo code Legends so they know I sent you.

Carissa Weiser (13:34)

Spark something uncommon this holiday with just the right gift from Uncommon Goods. Giving gifts that spark joy and wonder. That's such a special thing for those friends and family members you love. It's neat to see them light up with a look that says wow, this is perfect for me. And for several holiday seasons now, Uncommon Goods has been the place I go first for everyone on my list.

Jason Weiser (13:54)

Already we have the bulk of our holiday list covered. Most recently I found this Grow Anywhere Key Lime Tree created by Joel and Danny Trejo in Florida. I just can't believe this is real. It's low maintenance and this plant will for real produce little key limes. Even the flower buds smell like citrus.

Carissa Weiser (14:11)

And it's the perfect gift for this special person that we know who loves key limes and key lime pie.

Jason Weiser (14:16)

If it weren't for Uncommon Goods, we never would have thought of a gift like this.

Carissa Weiser (14:20)

As always, Uncommon Goods scours the globe for original, handmade and absolutely remarkable things, all the while supporting artists and small independent businesses. It's a double win. Whether you need a gift for a holiday host, for the nieces and nephews in your life, the book lovers, or die hard sports fans, really, there's something for everybody. Uncommon Goods has already found it. You just need to decide who gets What.

Jason Weiser (14:42)

To get 15% off your next gift, go to UncommonGoods.com Legends that's UncommonGoods.com Legends for 15% off. Don't miss out on this limited time offer Uncommon Goods we're all out of the ordinary, hey, Janshaw said, scraped and ragged when he arrived at the man's palace. Remember me? I made it. The Sheik, the local ruler, looked Janshah up and down. That's great. He was never opposed to that. Um, why was Janshah still weeping? Janshah said that this was his natural state. He was having a very difficult time right now. I really identify with this character, haseeb said, back in the cave, munching on a second fruit plate. Yeah, I thought you'd like him. The Queen of the Serpent smiled back in the story. Janshah stood there awkwardly. The Sheik Nasser looked down from his wall just as awkwardly. Come on in. The man waved and went to go open the gate. Janshah marveled at the entire castle, just up there in the mountains. What was this? It was Solomon's. He gave it to me. We're really close, nasir said. Janshah said that he was impressed by all of King Solomon's vacation options. And Nasir told Janshah as he held up some clothes not soiled by corpses and mule innards, that Solomon taught him the language of the birds. So Nasir was actually the king of the birds. Janshah took the clothes and then looked around. Didn't seem like there were a lot of them there, Nasir said. That was true. Birds weren't great servants because they were so flighty. He smirked. Get it? Because okay, yeah, they were migrating right now. They'd be back in the spring. When they returned, the bigger ones would take Jenshaw back home. Jenshaw said. Well, he was going to wait for a caravan down in the city, but that wouldn't be by till next year. Well, I could do six months, nasser said. In the meantime he could hang out there as long as he didn't cry. That was actually a stipulation in the text. So for the next six months, Janshial lived with the old man, and it was pretty good. He learned all about the castle and the things the old man had done, ate great food, and waited for his ride. And when the birds did finally arrive, Janshah was a welcome guest of their king. So in addition to bowing for their sovereign, they would kiss Janshah's hand, which was more pecking, but the thought was nice. Then one day the Sheik had to go out and do something as part of his kingship, so he was going to leave Janshah in charge of the castle. The bird servants would give him everything he needed, and pressing the humorously big ring of keys into his guest's hand, the Sheik said that Janshak could go in any room of the castle except for the locked room in the dungeon, nasir said, pointing to the hallway. Alright, he had the Parliament of the Owls and the Convocation of Eagles to get to. Probably wouldn't be back for several days. Janshak had completely free reign of the place, except for, once again, that one single forbidden locked room. Janshah took a deep breath. Yes, that single forbidden locked room that he had no interest in seeing whatsoever. And as soon as the door was clicked shut behind Nasser, Janshah found himself in front of the single forbidden locked room. He looked at the golden key and the golden padlock. Terrible metal to make a padlock out of, because how ridiculously soft it was. It was. It was almost asking to be opened. Then Jensha realized that he was only forbidden from any entering the room, not looking inside. He quickly unlocked the door, threw it open. And it was not a secret murder room. That is only when the protagonist is a young woman. And if you don't know what I'm referring to, I link to the Bluebeard page on TV tropes in the show Notes for Jen Shaw. It was a room full of gilded fountains and emerald gravel, of wondrous plants and amazing fragrances and feeling an irresistible drawl, he did enter the room. Strolling along, he was awestruck. And then he was terrified as, descending from the open ceiling, three birds dove into the water, him barely managing to get to some bushes before he was in sight. Looking around in panic, Janshaw had to get out of there before he was caught. They were still waiting on the birds that would carry him home if he could get to the door without them seeing. And then when the birds emerged from the water, he saw them. You see, when the story's protagonist is a young man, it is not only not a secret murder room full of dead bodies, but you might just meet the love of your life. But it might only be the love of his life, not hers. She was stunning. The birds that landed in the water emerged as women, leaving their feather cloaks to the side and getting dressed. And like the drawl of the room, erased any sort of trepidation about entering the room, the three women banished any thought of him being caught there. Jen Shah flung himself from the bushes and right to their feet. Now look, I know this is a fairy tale, but even in a fairy tale you can come on a little strong. And a man jumping from the bushes, hugging her shins and telling her how much he loved her and wanted to marry her, that's a bit much. Extracting from his grasp. The woman said, wow, thank you so much. No, though, leave this talk and wend thy ways. Basically stop it and move on to hear thanks, but no thanks. Maybe choose a different path and then decide to shout poetry at a woman about how she was a stone, but you'll get water from that stone is a very specific energy. And it was also Janshah's chosen response. The poetry goes, as she shone out in the garden in garments olive green, with open vest and collars and flowing hair, beseen, what is thy name? I asked her, and she replied, I am she who roasts the hearts of lovers on coals of love and teen of passion. And its anguish to her made my moan upon a rock. She answered, thy plaints are wasted clean, even if thy heart, I told her, be rock in very deed, yet hath God made fair water well from the rock I ween. And they laughed at him, as they should have. Anyway, they got one day a year in this room, so they were not going to waste it. They laughed and played and sang and made merry while Janshah watched, pined whatever it was. In the morning they picked up their feather suits, put them on, and flapped off into the sky, reaching up toward the blue circle. Janshah wept and swooned like the beauty of the rooms and the bird women made him forget about his oath. The anguish of losing a woman whose love he never had to begin with made him lose all fear of getting caught. What could Nasser do to him that was worse than losing her? So when Nasser found him and dragged him from the room, Jensha was spouting off his poetry about how beautiful those bird women were and how he had to marry her and why couldn't that have been a terrible murder room and not something that would imprison his heart forever? The Sheik said he knew. That's why he told Janshah not to go in there. But Jensha wouldn't be persuaded. He must see her again, even though she only visited once a year. He would wait a year. Yeah, your ride is here. You're leaving now, nasser said, pointing to the beefy birdie boys ready to take Janshah back to his father's kingdom. All Janshah had to do was tell them where to go and they would be off. But Janshah smiled. That's right. He didn't tell Nasir the location of his father's kingdom. Well then. No, no. He was staying. He would stay for a year until he could see her again. The Sheik Nasser might have threatened Janshah with just taking the man anywhere and leaving him, or simply dropping him off a mountain, but Nasir was a good guy. He wouldn't hurt Janshah. Instead, he would help Janshah trap this young woman in a relationship. Mother naked and as fair as virgin silver, Jenshaw mouthed to himself aloud as he watched the three bird women frolic and play almost one year later. Did you hear that? What if that's that guy from last year? One said to the others. The woman Jansha was in love with laughed. Even if it was that guy. One, that was a whole year ago. Nobody would wait around for a year. No one's that sad. And two, all they would need to do was don their coat of feathers and they were in the sky. As long as he didn't get that they she looked to where they had left their coats of feathers. Wait. One, two. Oh no. Jenshaw stood and they fled into the water to cover themselves and understand the severity of what happened. Janshah held her cloak. Janshah justified withholding her cloak because, well, if she left, he would die. Die of a broken heart, which I've been assured multiple times by apparent physicians writing in that this is a real thing that happens. Anyway, was her freedom worth a human life? Yes, she replied. His at least. He shook his head. She was clearly not in her right mind. He would hold onto her cloak until her king returned and could adjudicate all of this. She squinted. You know what, Jimsha? Jimsha was a very handsome man. Wow. How had she not seen it before? It's just his beautiful musky scent of flop sweat and dirt. His punctuality the way he looks at her, like a dog looking at a sandwich. Wow. What a man. I love you, she managed and forced herself to kiss him on the forehead. Jansha smiled and relaxed, saying he knew that if they spent any time together, under duress or not, she would see it his way. She was playing the long game Ish. She did ask for her cloak back immediately, possibly thinking that the bare minimum of flattery would work, but she was unfortunately wrong. Jensha let her friends go, but she was going with him before the King of the birds, Nasser, sitting on his throne, no doubt covered in way too much bird poop. Nasser Asked the woman. Verily, this youth loveth thee with exceeding love. Deal kindly with him, for he is of the great ones of mankind and of the sons of the kings, and his father ruleth over the land of Kabul and his reign compasseth a mighty empire. So let me get this right, because his dad was rich and powerful and he's annoying you by sticking around your house, I'm basically enslaved? She asked and then rolled her eyes. I hear and obey at thy behest. She swore that day that she would never betray Janshah. He did give her her feather suit back for a bit so she could fly him home, no doubt keeping a literal tight leash on her panting, she landed among the plains with the gazelle and Kabul. As he demanded her feather suit, she asked him, hey, in the story he always was telling about how he followed a gazelle into the ocean, Kabul appears to be one of the most landlocked regions of Afghanistan. It's at least 500 miles to the nearest sea. No, we're not. We're not going to address it. Cool. My son, King Tegma said, embracing Prince Janshah after he disappeared in that fishing boat on the ocean. And who is this lovely naked woman? King Teghmus asked. Janshah snapped his fingers and servants arrived with a cloak for his betrothed. This was the king's new daughter in law. So relationships can be difficult, communication can be a challenge, and it can sometimes be unclear when to keep working and when to move on. If however you feel like when you get your new house built, you have to have a special marble chest carved into the foundation in which you seal away your spouse's only means by which they can leave you with and led, your relationship might not be in a great place. And that is exactly what Jensha did. It was a bit much. A bit much but not nearly enough after their wedding. And yeah, Jensha was zonked out in blissful oblivion Shamsa stole down to the foundation with a pickaxe. Anyone who questioned her was ordered out. She was now the princess, after all, and she went to work. By 5am the marble was in pieces and she was slipping on her feather cloak. But. But where are you going? Janshah cried out from his balcony as Shamsa flew by to say goodbye and gloat. Mostly gloat. She said she was going home to the Castle of Jewels. But I love you, Jinsha said. Shimsa laughed. If he loved her so much, he could come find her at the Castle of Jewels with her parents djinn army. With that, she disappeared into the morning sky. We'll see the lengths Jainsaw will go to to track down the woman who doesn't want to be with him at all. But that will once again be right.

Carissa Weiser (29:07)

After this Fall weather means sitting by the fire with a book in my lap and, you know, maybe a nice glass of wine. That's why First Leaf was such a ne find for making sure we always have the perfect wine on hand for those cozy nights and dinner parties and neighborhood get togethers.

Jason Weiser (29:21)

First Leaf is a personalized wine club that knows our wine preferences so much better than we do, and so now every month they send us a customized selection of wines we're guaranteed to love.

Carissa Weiser (29:32)

Truthfully, we know very little about wine, but getting started with First Leaf was a breeze. I just answered a few quick questions on their site like how I feel about almonds and buttered toast, and they put together an assortment of top notch wines based on my answers.

Jason Weiser (29:47)

Just for me, one of the questions was how adventurous are you? I was right in the middle and I watched you crank that sliding scale to the max.

Carissa Weiser (29:55)

Of course. And in the end, First Leaf got it right, especially with the Sir Oscar Derby Chardonnay from southeastern Australia. That's been my favorite so far. It's like tasting lemon meringue pie. It's very smooth with a balanced acidity.

Jason Weiser (30:08)

We've tried wines we've never heard of and it's been fun to share with friends. It's so easy because First Leaf delivers to our door on a schedule we can control so we never miss it. Plus, if we get a bottle we don't absolutely love, Firstleaf has a 100% satisfaction guarantee. So get cozy and pop open that perfect bottle of wine from First Leaf. Go to try firstleaf.com legends to sign up and you'll get your first six hand picked bottles for just $44.95. That's T R Y F I R S T l e a f.com legends try firstleaf.com legends janshah demonstrating that his assertion of if I can't be with you, I'm gonna die was pretty much false. Moped for the next six months, his dad brought in all manner of enslaved women to sing and dance for him, and he didn't really have anything to do at all except for snack and nap in his palace while he waited for news from any of the merchants or travelers that his father had sent to the ends of the earth to inquire about the Castle of Jewels. He was distraught though, when he learned that the scouts had returned with nothing, no word of this mysterious castle with the Djinn and the Bird women. King Tedmus, grieved by the bitter tears that his son wept, sent his armies out to seek after the princess. It was a bit excessive, yes. It was also extremely ill advised because, well, King Teghmus was at war. Wait. Gone? All gone? King Kavid? The King of India asked. All gone? They just marched away from the city and off somewhere. So his city is completely undefended, king Kavid said. Really? After he had made war upon us and ravaged our reign and slain our men and all of our treasures had made gain? The advisor nodded. That was a flowery and wordy way of saying it, but yes. Well, what are we waiting for? The war spans several nights of the 1001 Nights, and honestly, it's a lot. Hundreds of thousands of people die and it's basically a stalemate because even though he was caught flat footed, Janshah's dad rushed back and made up for it. It must be why he didn't realize that Janshah was gone. Yeah, Jamshow was unable to deal with Shamsa being gone and with no idea where the Castle of Jewels was, he knew who would. It took him several months, but hiring people to take him across the desert, he managed to avoid people pulling themselves in half in the Kingdom of the island of the Apes and the Valley of the Ants by ending up back at the same city as thousand dinars for a simple job. Thousand dinars, he heard, and Janshah walked up and introduced himself again. The guy didn't recognize him. He sends a lot of strangers to their deaths in mule envelopes. You can't expect him to remember that many faces, or any. So the next day Janshah got in the mule, went up the nest, didn't toss the gemstones down, was betrayed, and then he climbed across the Sheik Nasir's palace. Who told him no, he didn't know and sent him Home on a bird. That bird, oddly enough, got lost. The world was a big place, I guess, and dropped him off for the King of the Beasts. And after questioning all the beasts, none of them knew where the Castle of the Jewels was. But the King of the Beasts did have one more idea. His master, the monk who lived in the Hermitage of Diamonds. And this next bit is a direct quote, and it sounds like it's straight from Usador's intro in hello to the Magic Tavern. And this magical monk is a cunning inventor and an artificer of all manner of strange works. And he is a crafty Warri warlock full of guiles and wiles, and an arch deceiver of wondrous wickedness who hath mastered every kind of magic and witchcraft. He also probably has several other names you do not know. So Janysha hopped on a bird with four wings and rode to the monk. Yagmus. Nope, never heard of it. Sounds made up. Yagmus said he had been a monk since the time of Noah, but yeah, he didn't know where that castle of Jewels was. Was Jenshaw sure this woman wanted to see him again? Yes, she's my wife. She was just taken away by her own wings. Jenshaw glowered. Well, sure. You came all the way up here. I'll do what I can. I have animals and Djinn that come swear fealty to me each year. We can ask them. Yagamus rose to his feet and found Jensha a diamond bed to sleep on until then. Djinn, Marids, elephants. No one knew about the Castle of Jewels and everyone thought it sounded made up and that she really didn't want to be found. Wait, did you say Castle of Jewels? Jen Shah heard as he was about to climb aboard the bird for the long flight back to Kabul. The bird said, yeah, he had actually heard of it when he was a chick. His parents had been out looking for food for them and they were gone for eight days. They returned with food and told of the place that had captured them. The Castle of Jewels. And the terrifying Merid, which is basically an evil super genie. Well, he actually let them go out of mercy for their hatchlings. The bird taxi's parents were gone now and they moved pretty soon after, you know, on account of all the evil genies. But it was within a week's flight of their old nest. He could take Jenshaw there as they swooped down. Jenshaw said that, wow, it was really a castle of jewels sitting there on the mountain. It was also a two months flight on an elephant bird. Sorry, this is as close as I can get you, the bird said. Jenshah was about to argue that it was still like a three days walk up the mountain. But remember what the bird said about his parents. Sure, yeah, totally understood. Upon landing, they found themselves face to face with a marid guard. The elephant bird, shrieking that this was his nightmare, took off toward the sky, leaving the human traveler to face the giant infernal djinn by himself. The guard looked down at him. You wouldn't happen to be Janshah, would you? When Shamsa told her parents that she was actually married to a human prince, they were pretty angry, sure, but marriage was marriage, so they had to find their new son in law and yeah, look, I'm not gonna buy what the story's selling on this one, but I'll let you know what's on offer and you can decide what you think. According to the story, Shamsa, seeing, I guess, what links Jamsha would go to in order to entrap her, saw his love for her and did in fact grow to love him too. And not to get on my soapbox too much here, but this is after she laughed at him, fled him, returned to the King of the Birds. He stole her clothes and means of escape, put them in a vault underneath his house, assaulted her, and then she fled the moment she got the chance. But she loves him. And look, maybe the story is just really internally consistent because it's being told by Scheherazade, the forced wife of the Sultan, playing to her audience and saying like, look how happy and in love this prisoner can be. I don't know though. Regardless whether out of propriety and needing to find their son in law, or because she miraculously loved him now, they sent a Meeread out to seek Janshah among the whirl of the humans, and the Meeread returned. It's in the text with Janshah riding on his shoulders like a little kid going to the zoo. I'd like to tell you that Janshah had changed, that his journey gave him some time to think, and he came to win both Shamsa and her djinn parents over. I think there's room for that rating. Maybe it requires ignoring other parts of the text where Shamsa has to apologize to Jamsha for sending him on such a journey. So let's all just throw up our hands in exasperation and move on. Jamshah stayed with Shamsa and her parents for a few months and then began the trip home, riding on a litter carried by jinn, which are genies if you didn't know? Which compared to clinging to a bird for two months, pretty great. The besieged city in Kabul marveled at his litter carried by genies and their new genie princess. When they landed in the center of town, right in front of the palace, Jamshah turned to the genies that carried him. Hey. He had a small favor to ask them. That night, the war ended to the sound of screams of the genies massacring the besieging warriors to a man, and the cries of their king, who was strung up and forced to watch. They actually let him go home because instead of dealing with an angry army who had come to avenge him, they now had a man who watched genies tear through his army like it was nothing. So Jamsha and Shamsa lived a long life together. The end. Um, what? Bulukiya asked the man sitting between two tombs. Old Jamsha, whose weeping was silenced only by the telling of the story. Old Jamshaw said that that was the story. Good one, right? Bulukiya said. Yeah, he guessed. Jamshaw was really kind of a gross protagonist. But what. What was all this? What was the tombs? That was kind of the hook. He was here. So what happened to Shamsa? Oh, she was eaten by a shark. Bulukiya could barely contain his laughter. Um, what? Oh, I'm sorry. Is this funny to you? My wife, the love of my life, getting eaten by a shark? Yeah, kind of. What happened? Bulukiya was long past the point of trying to hold it in. We were traveling, she went for a bath, and then she was eaten by a shark. I'm actually getting really offended that you keep laughing. Old Jamshaw said, I'm sorry. Just like, talk about left field. Bulukiya said, people get eaten by sharks. They're dangerous. Jamshaw couldn't believe this. Not really, though Bulukiya said, people kill way more sharks than sharks kill people. And tacked on endings like this just spread fear and misinformation about an already misunderstood animal. It's not an ending. It actually happened. She was killed, and her parents built me this tombstone next to hers for me to sit here and wait to join her. Well, I'm cured. Bulukiya stood, thanking Jamshaw. He had been wandering aimlessly after failing to get Solomon's ring. But now he saw what wallowing in self pity would get him. A grave and a sleazy story. He was a prince too, and he had a kingdom and a people that needed him. There was a time for sorrow and wallowing, but. But not for years. He still had some good that he could do. He left Jamshah on the mountain and descended. He rambled on, walking on the waves, searching for home, until he came to Paradise, a garden resembling Eden. There he could eat a feast that never spoiled. There were people and princes that visited the place. But he didn't want Paradise. He wanted Cairo. Home. He wasn't ready yet. He prayed, and he woke up in his bed the following morning. So we have one guy who wouldn't let the past go and is still weeping between some graves, and another who learned from his mistakes, accepted his life for what it was and not what he wanted it to be, and went on to become a great king, the Queen of Serpents said to Haseeb. Back in the cave, Haseeb said he knew. He understood. His eyes widened. He. He learned. The Queen of Serpents smiled. He had been learning the whole time. The funny thing about life was that most of it is out of our control. Things would happen. Good things, bad things. It might be hard to see the reason for them at the time, or if there's a reason at all. But there is one thing you can do. Keep going. I mean, you could be Janshah, sitting weeping between two tombs for the rest of your days. Or you can be Bulukiya, rejecting Eden itself to do what you can to make the world a better place. She said she was sorry his dad died in a freak sinking library accident, but that didn't need to define his life, even if it would define hers. Haseeb was confused about that last part, but wasn't about to question it when the Queen of Serpents said that he could leave now if he wanted. She had only said the waiting until winter part so that he would settle in and listen. He had actually been down there for two years. Don't worry about it. She just had one request. Oh, yeah, the public bath thing. Sebast. Yeah, sure. He wouldn't go into a public bath. Not even that difficult of a promise to keep. He was doing it right now. Sure, Haseeb's mother and wife were ecstatic that he was alive, and the woodcutters, upon learning of his return, came to him and gave him half their earnings, begging him not to take retribution. Hasib could only laugh, saying, what is past is past. That which befell us was decreed of Allah and destiny doeth away with dexterity. They looked at each other. Um, what did that mean? No matter how capable someone is, you can't change what's fated to happen, he said. Wow, you sound very learned. They said. Long way from that kid hitting a rock with an axe. Hasib could only smile. Then they invited him to a big group bath, as you do. He politely declined, not only because awkward, but because of his promise. They all had him over to their houses instead. Haseeb became one of the wisest, most powerful men in the city. He became rich by investing the honey money. And he was beloved by all. Well, almost all. Hey, you too good for my baths? Nobody is too good for my baths. A voice cried out from a doorway. Oh no, I just. I made this weird oath to a snake woman, Haseeb said. The bath owner scoffed as if he hadn't heard that excuse before. Come on in. These baths will get you so clean. No, really, I'm good, He said and started to walk away before he heard a get him, boys. Behind him. Yeah, we're gonna wash you up real good. The bath owner cackled as the men tore Haseeb's clothes off and the door closed behind him. I will say with the threatening overtones and the threatening actions, I thought this was gonna go to a dark place, but that was really just the best bath I've ever had in my life. Haseeb said, sitting with his back against the wall. The bath owner said, yeah, he was sorry about having to use force, but he was just really proud of his product. Also, all the sultan's guys had been hanging out there for like, weeks. Hasib said, sultan's guise. And just then, the door burst open. Rise, O man, and come with us to the sultan, for thou art his debtor. Hasib was allowed to clothe on the way, but. But stumbling into the palace, he couldn't get a straight answer as to what exactly he owed the Sultan of Persia. The sultan himself was no help, laying down with a napkin on his face and groaning for the pain. The vizier pointed at the sultan. Heal him. Haseeb shrugged. How? That was what he was supposed to know. He was the son of Daniel, right? Haseeb nodded. And as such, he went to school and was educated like his father. Seb said, well, it was. It was tricky. He started to tell them about the recent epiphany and everything, but they shut him right down. Do not multiply words upon us. They cried in the original, which I kind of love as a retort to someone obviously trying to talk their way out of something. The vizier got up and paced. Well, maybe the Queen of Serpents knew as he shook his head, he didn't know what they were talking about. You spent some time with her and returned Miraculously. Two years, to be exact. The vizier nodded. Yeah, they knew. They knew all about the honey basin and the woodcutters and the queen. And if Haseeb stayed in school, he would have known about the prophecy. Prophecy? Haseeb cocked his head. Exactly that. The one who spends two years with the Queen of Serpents. When he enters a public bath, his belly will turn. He shall have the power to heal the Sultan. The vizier pointed to a goon who tore open Hasib's shirt to reveal his rather large birthmark. They didn't believe him that it was a birthmark, neither then, nor during the beatings that followed. Hasib held out for a long time, but soon he broke. He would show them. He would show them the cavern of the Queen of Serpents. You just lift up that ring. There's a sticky cistern inside. But she's down there. There are a lot of stools too, if you're into that. 12,000. Haseep winced. The long horseback ride up to the mountains wasn't exactly comfortable with a broken ribbon. The vizier scoffed, sprinkling his prepared spell. And the ground melted. It revealed the cistern, the hall, the iron door, and the stools. And finally the Queen of Serpents, who was riding on her mule sized snake up to the surface. You broke your oath, she said to Hasib, who couldn't meet her eyes. She laughed. He should know by now that there was no fighting fate. It was written on his forehead as it was hers, and it was sealed the day Haseeb was born. As for you, she looked to the vizier who had just wrecked her home and her many, many stools. You will be ash before the day is out. Truly, the Queen of Serpents didn't see any reason for her death, but she said she didn't need to. It was fate ordained by eternity for eternity, and she imagined that. Could she see the whole picture, the wide ripples her story would have? Not just in the lifetime of her contemporaries, but for all time, she would agree. But for now she could only close her eyes and accept Asib, though sobbed as back at the palace, the vizier slaughtered the Queen of Serpents. Asib went to work preparing her flesh the way she had told him to. After the Sultan ate her flesh and was in recovery, he returned to the vizier's workshop to see the man pointing at two vials. What were those? Hasib said. Oh, well, just one of those will give you all the wisdom it's possible to acquire. Haseeb stopped when the vizier snatched the first vial and gulped it down. Not that one though. That one. Well, that was hyper concentrated serpent blood. But she said he would do that. The vizier coughed or tried to. His throat had already closed for the last time as his neck, hands and finally his face swelled and turned purple. True to the Queen of Serpents last prophecy, he was burned. That day Hasib was made the new vizier and returned home to his wife. A few weeks later, when he was helping his mother move into the palace, he noticed a chest. What was that? His mother said. Oh yeah. Well, he was all into learning now. That was actually all that remained of Daniel's, his father's library. Four leaves. Four leaves that would give someone all the wisdom in the world. Haseeb opened the chest and then. And then he closed it again. He would have loved to learn it that way. But his fate had been different. He had to learn it from a snake woman in a cavern. And being arrested in a bathrobe and being beaten in the palace and having to kill a friend. Life had been his teacher. But he would save those leaves for his own child someday, that they might avoid his hardship and simply read the book. He asked them to because he could see now that his mother and late father were just trying to help. And he had no doubt his own child would see that in him. I'm sorry, is something funny? Aseeb asked his mother, who was stifling a laugh. She said, no, it's just. You'll see. That's where we'll leave Haseep's story. I linked the source again in the show notes. If after almost two hours, you're still hungry for more Haseep content. And yeah, the death of the Queen of Serpents is a little confusing. She definitely leans hard into the fatalism and accepting what's going on. And even though I tried to link the stories thematically and draw some sort of meaning out of them in the original, there's very much a feel of, hey, a bunch of fun stuff happened to these guys. Okay, you can go home now. Haseeb. Someone did a graphic novel of the story that I have not read, but it looks interesting. I link to that too in the show notes next week. It's the story of a French knight who knows that it's always a good idea to sucker punch dragons. Also, real quickly, we're on YouTube now. Not in any way that would matter to you if you're already listening, but we've had numerous requests so you can find us there now too. At this time. There's no specific YouTube or video content, just the audio episodes. But if you're listening there. Hi. I put a link in the show notes. The creature this week is the Wakulu from Mali in Africa. Now, not to alarm you, but the Wakulu could be watching you right now. And yes, the idea of anyone watching me as I'm standing in our studio recording this is kinda scary. And not just because of my many line flubs, but it's a little bit more off putting that it's a three foot tall hairy naked man. And that's just what the Wkulu is. Similar to mythological dwarves and other cultures, the Wkulu are shorter and stocky in magic. As I said, they can turn invisible, which leads to the maybe odd choice of going around naked. That led me to a weird mental rabbit hole of if you could turn invisible, would you be naked by choice all the time? I don't think I would, and I don't know what that says about me, but the Wkulu, they are super down for that. They have large heads full of abundant hair, though I'm not sure how people actually know that given that once again, they're invisible. But the reason I said they could be watching you is that they can also see through walls and trees. So when it comes to the Wkulu, it's privacy for me, but not for thee. And when it comes to keeping invisible naked dwarves from looking through your walls at you, I'm sorry, you can't. This is apparently a fact of life we all just need to learn to live with, because not only are they super alert to danger and very sneaky, but if cornered, they are oddly great wrestlers. Being able to throw a full grown man. And probably the only thing that's worse than being silently watched by a little hairy naked man is being thrown against a brick wall by a little hairy nake. That's it for this time. Myths and Legends is by Jason and Carissa Weiser. Our theme song is by Broke for Free. And the Creature of the Week music is by Steve Combs. There are links to even more of the music we used in the show Notes. Thank you so much for listening and we'll see you next time.