Summary: Navigating Adult ADHD – Episode #151

ADHD Time Blindness: Why We Lose Hours, Miss Deadlines & Stall on Long-Term Dreams

Host: Xena Jones
Date: February 2, 2026

Overview

In this episode, Xena Jones unpacks the concept of “time blindness” in adults with ADHD, exploring why time feels so slippery, why deadlines get missed, and why long-term goals feel perpetually out of reach. Jones combines personal anecdotes, science-backed explanations, quotes from leading experts, and actionable strategies—delivered with her trademark relatable, no-nonsense style—to help listeners understand and work with their unique brains, rather than against them.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

What is ADHD Time Blindness? (03:00 – 09:40)

• Definition: Time blindness is a common symptom of ADHD, manifested as difficulty sensing the passing of time and accurately estimating how long tasks will take. This impacts the ability to plan, prioritize, and meet deadlines.
• “Now or Not Now”: For ADHD brains, time sense is often binary—things are urgent, right now, or relegated to an indefinite “not now.”

  "Everything is either now or not now. Okay, very all or nothing." (03:57)

• Typical Experiences:
  • Drastically underestimating how long tasks will take ("thinking a 30 min task will take 5")
  • Losing hours to tangential research or hyperfocus
  • Missing or perpetually postponing long-term goals like saving money or writing a book

The Lived Experience (09:45 – 13:12)

• Personal Example: Jones shares her time as a travel agency manager, constantly caught up in daily fires, never progressing on personal goals.
  • "All that was now, now, now. And so of course my goals...were just pushed off, pushed off, pushed off." (12:40)
• Misconceptions: Time blindness is NOT a personality flaw or a moral failing—it's brain wiring.
  • "This is not a personality flaw. Our difficulties with time is not a moral failing. It doesn't mean we're a bad person." (13:10)

Science & Brain Wiring (13:13 – 22:00)

• Cognitive Underpinnings:
  1. Working Memory Dysfunction (14:45): Difficulty holding and juggling future events and deadlines.
  2. Planning & Prioritizing Issues (16:00): Inability to see a clear order of what must be done first.
  3. Dopamine Dysregulation (17:50): ADHD brains seek instant dopamine (reward), making long-term tasks unappealing.

     "Your brain is literally pulled towards whatever feels real loud and rewarding in this moment, okay?" (18:50)

• Expert Reference:
  • Dr. Russell Barkley:

    "Wherever the now goes, we go." (08:17)

Everyday Manifestations (22:01 – 26:50)

• Work: Underestimating time for reports or prep, leading to late nights and weekend catch-up.
• Relationships: Chronic lateness, feeling shame or frustration from others’ comments.
• At Home: Intending to do a quick task but losing track of time due to hyperfocus.

Practical Strategies for Managing Time Blindness (26:51 – 50:25)

1. Make Time Visible (27:00)

• Out of sight, out of mind: Keep clocks and visible timers around.
• Use visual planners/calendars—color-coded for different people/tasks.

  “You have to be able to see it, otherwise it doesn’t exist.” (27:08)

• Digital and analog clocks in key places (kitchen, bathroom, office).
• “It never ceases to amaze me when somebody will say, ‘I just thought it took me five minutes to get ready.’ And then you had me time it. And I realized it actually takes me 25 minutes.” (30:15)

2. Externalize Memory (34:02)

• Don’t rely on remembering—calendar everything, with recurring reminders for birthdays, appointments, medication, etc.
• Use tech help: Siri, Alexa, or similar to set alarms and reminders for everything.

  “Do not trust—oh yeah, yeah, of course I’ll remember that, my friend. My brain is so cute when it says that. I laugh at myself now and I’m like, yeah, yeah, I’ll remember. And I’m like, I’m so cute. No I won’t.” (34:08)

3. Plan Your Time—Tactically (36:05)

• The unpopular truth: Planning is key (“Failing to plan is planning to fail.”) (36:15)
• Break tasks into teeny, tiny steps for realism and do-ability.
  • Example: Jones formerly thought producing a podcast took “one hour,” now allocates 2.5 hours after tracking each step.
  • Outlining, research, recording, uploading, making graphics, writing descriptions, etc.—each gets its own chunk of time.

4. Adjust Your Expectations (41:33)

• Reality check—ask: “Is this a kind amount of time to give myself to get this done?”
• Time activities to gather data for more accurate planning.

  “What you think is going to take you five minutes, might take you 25 minutes.” (42:55)

5. Manage Your Mind (44:40)

• After setting time aside, expect mental resistance—your brain will rebel.
• Metaphor: The brain as both a “toddler running around with a knife” and a responsible adult.

  "Learning to manage your mind is seeing when they're a toddler with a knife is trying to control you... and learning to say 'not right now, this is the thing I'm going to sit down and do.'" (45:48)

• Key skill: Not waiting to “feel like” doing a task, but committing anyway, despite discomfort.

Additional Supports and Compassion (49:00 – 53:00)

• Build Scaffolding: Use people and tech support—body doubling, coworking sessions (FocusMate), sharing calendars, regular check-ins with others.
• Self-Compassion:

  “You can’t beat yourself into being better with time. You’ve got to be kind and understanding and supportive with yourself. Please, please stop with the beating, okay?” (50:39)

• Communicate Needs: Let loved ones know this is not about caring or effort, but brain wiring. Share what supports you’re using and how they can help.

Notable Quotes

• "Wherever the now goes, we go."—Dr. Russell Barkley (08:17)
• "Our brain likes to say it's just five minutes. I can be ready in five minutes. No, it's 25 minutes. Put a clock in the bathroom and watch it." (30:22)
• "It's not because you don't care. It's not because you're irresponsible. It is because your brain is literally pulled towards whatever feels real loud and rewarding in this moment." (18:50)
• "Do not trust—oh yeah, yeah, of course I’ll remember that, my friend. My brain is so cute when it says that... No I won’t." (34:08)
• "Learning to manage your mind is seeing when they're a toddler with a knife is trying to control you... and learning to say 'not right now, this is the thing I'm going to sit down and do.'" (45:48)
• "You can’t beat yourself into being better with time. You’ve got to be kind and understanding and supportive with yourself." (50:39)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• Time Blindness Explained: 03:00–09:40
• Personal Example of “Now vs Not Now”: 09:45–13:12
• Three Core Causes (Brain Science): 13:13–22:00
• How It Looks at Work, Home, Relationships: 22:01–26:50
• Making Time Visible: 27:00–32:00
• Externalizing Memory: 34:02–36:00
• Planning Your Time: 36:05–41:32
• Adjusting Expectations: 41:33–44:39
• Managing Your Mind: 44:40–49:00
• Tech, People, and Kindness: 49:00–53:00

Conclusion

Xena Jones wraps up with an empowering reminder: time blindness isn’t a character defect, but a difference in brain wiring with concrete, science-backed strategies to work around it. With a blend of realism, humor, and deep empathy, the episode makes the struggle relatable and offers pathway to practical change.

“You’re not broken. Your brain is just doing time differently.” (52:15)