Every sincere devotee occasionally gets discouraged with their spiritual progress. For the beginner, who may sense no results from practicing meditation, it’s easy to think, “I must be doing something wrong,” or, “Maybe I’m just not good enough to meditate.” For the more mature devotee, who may have had some inner experiences, the thought can still arise, “But I don’t feel God’s presence after all my efforts. Maybe I won’t be able to achieve the goal I’m seeking.”

Recently after meditation I found myself grappling with such discouraging thoughts about my own progress. At that moment an uplifting realization entered my mind and changed my perspective: “Once you realize that the material world can never provide the happiness you seek, you have crossed a threshold that inevitably leads to soul freedom.”

Yoganandaji talks about the “anguishing monotony” we experience after countless incarnations of thwarted attempts to find lasting happiness in the world. Once we sincerely begin to seek higher realities and remain steadfast, our goal of finding God will itself help guide us toward fulfillment. Though we may not perceive any progress or changes in ourself, every effort we make breaks down inner barriers and moves us closer to God.

I recall a memorable moment when we were taking Swami Kriyananda to an appointment. Jyotish was driving, Swamiji sat in the passenger seat, and I was in the back. Swamiji was talking about the spiritual growth that he had observed in some Ananda members. Though we rarely talked about ourselves in his presence, I surprised myself by blurting out: “I don’t think that I’ve changed all that much.”

Swamiji turned around in his seat, looked me squarely in the eyes, and said with great conviction, “How can you say that? You’re an entirely different person than when you came ten years ago!” His unexpected response filled me with hope. Though I couldn’t perceive any changes within myself, his words reminded me that spiritual growth is often subtle and imperceptible.

Unlike worldly goals, where success is measured by tangible results, spiritual progress requires faith that every effort brings us closer to the source of true happiness. Crossing the threshold of seeking union with God sets us on a journey where each step, no matter how small, carries us forward.

Yogananda said that Christ consciousness, or Kutastha Chaitanya, God’s Infinite Presence, can be more readily perceived at this time of the year, if we but lift our hearts to receive it. Whether you celebrate Christmas, Diwali, Chanukah, or any other tradition doesn’t matter, for God’s consciousness embraces all paths.

To help us attune to this Divine Presence, Yogananda started the tradition of having an eight-hour meditation on December 23rd. If you’re near an Ananda community or center, we warmly invite you to join us. For those at a distance, we offer an online meditation on December 21st.

I’ll close by sharing a beautiful poem by Master called, “If You Want His Answer.” May it fill you with encouragement and hope for your spiritual journey. (One of our members has put it to music.)

Whether He replies or not, Keep calling Him— Ever calling in the chamber Of continuous prayer. Whether He comes or not, Believe He is ever approaching Nearer to you With each command of your heart. Whether He answers or not, Keep entreating Him. Even if He makes no reply In the way you expect, Ever know that in some subtle way He will respond. In the darkness of your deepest prayers, Know that with you He is playing Hide-and-seek. And in the midst of the dance of life, disease, and death, If you keep calling Him, Undepressed by His seeming silence, You will receive His answer.

With joy and blessings,

Nayaswami Devi

Listen to Devi as she first reads the blog, then expands on its meaning and messages for readers with behind-the-blog commentary. Subscribe to the podcast or download the audio recording by right-clicking here. Or listen to it here (7:15):

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