Podcast Episode Summary

Podcast: New Books Network — Burned by Books

Host: Chris Holmes
Guest: Erin Somers, author of The Ten Year Affair
Date: November 5, 2025
Book Discussed: The Ten Year Affair (Simon & Schuster, 2025)

1. Episode Overview

This episode features a rich, incisive conversation between host Chris Holmes and novelist Erin Somers about her new novel, The Ten Year Affair. The book traces the emotionally and psychologically complex journey of Cora, a married mother, as she navigates the imagined and real tensions of a decade-long near-affair with Sam, also married. The discussion delves into modern infidelity, the reality of adult friendships, the nuances of happiness, and the existential weight of aging, all explored through Somers’ trademark humor and acute observational wit.

2. Key Discussion Points and Insights

The Novel’s Originality: Infidelity Through Parallel Lives

• Novel’s Conceit (05:13–06:00):
  Holmes praises the book’s dual narrative structure—alternating between Cora’s real and fantasized affair—remarking on its rare, decade-spanning exploration of desire and responsibility.
• Origin Story (06:00–08:09):
  Somers describes how the concept sprang intuitively from her experiences in a Brooklyn baby group, initially intended as a short story before evolving, almost magically, into a narrative involving a “multiverse” of parallel emotional realities.

“It was one of those really magical and incredibly rare writing moments where it just came out like one idea led to the other.”
— Erin Somers [07:08]

Satire of Modern Parenting

• Baby Group Inspiration (06:20–09:17):
  Holmes and Somers bond over the comedic—and at times absurd—scenes from the novel drawn directly from real-life baby group experiences (“people who are parenting the most, doing things they've seen on the Internet...” [06:33]).
• Memorable Scene: Early Potty Training (08:20–09:29):
  Somers confirms an outlandish anecdote (potty training a six-week-old), noting the empathy and social fascination in such moments.

“At first she was running with a six week old baby into the bathroom every few minutes and holding the baby over the toilet as if the baby might begin potty training…”
— Erin Somers [08:23]

Characterizing Marriage and Elliot, the Husband

• Avoiding the ‘Evil Husband’ Trope (09:49–12:05):
  Somers made Elliot, Cora’s husband, likable and complex to heighten the emotional conflict, resisting easy moral binaries.
• The Everyday as Erosion (09:49–10:57):
  Holmes observes that the ordinary accrual of daily routine and minor annoyances nudges relationships toward existential questions.
• Single Most Attractive Day (12:05–12:58):
  Holmes and Somers discuss how Elliot’s appeal can be lost to routine, only to be suddenly noticeable again—a motif of how time and habit distort perceptions of those closest to us.

“I wanted him to be cool and kind of a goofy slacker...that's what makes the problem so intractable.”
— Erin Somers [10:57]

Humor’s Role in Difficult Material

• Humor as Lifeblood (12:58–15:19):
  Holmes calls Somers “one of the great humor writers” and explores how wit enables both character and reader to grapple with high-stakes personal disaster.
• Crafting Humor (13:51–14:58):
  Somers admits humor is central—“the thing that gets me to the desk and keeps me interested in a project”—and that she reads lines aloud to her husband to test their impact.

“Humor’s a way of being a friend to your reader and inviting the reader in… It is just the key to my writing.”
— Erin Somers [14:43]

Read-Aloud: Satirical Baby Group Scene

• Infamous Scene (15:19–19:22):
  Somers performs a vibrant excerpt, capturing the surreal competitiveness and performativity of parenting and birthing experiences—eliciting laughter and tears from the host.

“Here, she said. She...shoved one [earbud] in Cora's ear...listening to the voice of a woman describing the orgasm she'd had during labor.”
— Erin Somers (as Liz) [16:33]

Female Friendship and Social Complexity

• Friendship as Secret Theme (20:52–22:16):
  While the novel is an affair story on the surface, Somers explains that the friendship between Cora and Sam’s wife, Jules, provides a vital undercurrent—“Trojan Horsed in there”—for exploring the tangle of intimacy, alliance, and rivalry among adults.

“Cora’s friendship with Jules is a really compelling piece… it's so, so tangled and so fraught.”
— Erin Somers [21:32]

Happiness, Adulthood, and Desire

• What Is Happiness? (23:19–25:09):
  The hosts discuss Jules’ pronouncement (“Happiness is only for children...adults are after something else. Interesting is better than happy.” [23:53]), wondering if this is a wisdom or just a rationalization of adult disappointment.
• Happiness Redefined (25:09–26:16):
  Somers suggests that happiness in adulthood often comes from unexpected small moments, not the conventional milestones we anticipate.

“It’s none of the things that you think it’s going to be. It's like some quiet thing that's over to the side is where happiness can be found.”
— Erin Somers [25:35]

Fantasies vs. Reality: The Emotional Weight of Imagination

• Making Imagined Affairs Real (26:16–28:19):
  Somers wanted Cora’s fantasy affair to mirror real relationships, including “deflating or depressing things” such as arguments or even abortion, not just passion.
• The “Full Menu” of Feelings (28:19–29:01):
  Both literal and emotional pleasures and pains are essential to feeling alive; Cora is “hungry for life” and craves the full spectrum, which she pursues through fantasy.

“I want every feeling. I want to know it all. And even...that's going to include pain and loss.”
— Erin Somers [28:34]

Covid as Accelerant of Alienation

• Covid’s Metaphorical Role (29:01–30:24):
  The pandemic, while not the novel’s focus, functions as a narrative accelerant, intensifying characters’ loneliness and driving them toward risk and introspection.

“It was an accelerant for alienation and isolation. It caused many people to become lonely in new and terrible ways…”
— Erin Somers [29:36]

The Urgency of Aging, Death, and Taking Emotional Risks

• Midlife and Existential Anxiety (30:24–33:01):
  The characters’ proximity to 40 brings heightened awareness of mortality—and a compensatory, sometimes “frenzied” drive to squeeze meaning from life, often tipping into infidelity and other impulsive acts.

“We gotta live our lives. We're gonna die.”
— Erin Somers [32:54]

3. Notable Quotes and Memorable Moments

• On crafting from life:
  “I'm sort of humble enough at this point in my career to follow those ideas that emerge organically.”
  — Erin Somers [07:56]

• On the power and perils of imagined lives:
  “Why is she...having something fraught...happen to her in her fantasy life?...It follows the rhythms of a real affair.”
  — Erin Somers [26:55]

• On what makes adults happy:
  “It's like some quiet thing that's over to the side is where happiness can be found.”
  — Erin Somers [25:35]

• On life’s brevity:
  “We gotta live our lives. We're gonna die.”
  — Erin Somers [32:54]

4. Key Timestamps (MM:SS)

• 05:13 – Introduction to The Ten Year Affair’s premise
• 06:00 – Somers explains origins of the novel and the “multiverse” concept
• 08:20 – Real-life inspiration for absurd baby group scenes
• 09:49 – Discussion on making Elliot a complex, non-villainous husband
• 12:39 – The concept of “single most attractive day”
• 13:51 – The centrality of humor to Somers’ writing process
• 15:38 – Read-aloud: parent group scene; technique behind character creation [19:22]
• 20:52 – On the deep complexity of friendship between women
• 23:53 – Jules’ pronouncement on happiness and adulthood
• 25:35 – Observations on how adult happiness shifts
• 26:55 – The emotional depth and realism of imagined affairs
• 28:19 – The “full menu” line and craving the breadth of experience
• 29:36 – Covid’s role as metaphor and emotional accelerant
• 31:47 – The urgency and anxiety of aging; mortality as context for risk
• 33:28 – Somers’ book recommendations

5. Book Recommendations

From Erin Somers:

• Flesh (shortlisted for the Booker Prize) by David Slay (sp?):
  “It’s very intense, very surprising...unbelievably well executed.” [33:28]
• Loved and Missed by Susie Boyt (NYRB):
  “…About a grandmother who has to raise her granddaughter… It’s funny. It’s beautiful. That’s the novel that I’ve been recommending to absolutely everyone in every corner of my life.” [35:29]

6. Tone and Style

The conversation is warm, approachable, and shot through with wry humor—mirroring Somers' novel itself. Both host and guest keep the discussion lively, open to laughter, and unafraid to dwell on the sadness, poignancy, and absurdity of modern life.

7. Conclusion

This episode powerfully unpacks the psychological, social, and existential stakes of The Ten Year Affair, while also providing a window into Erin Somers’s process, thematic concerns, and highly original voice. Listeners gain both a deep tease of the novel’s pleasures and insights into life’s grand messiness—delivered with compassion, intellect, and wit.