Not Loveline: "TALKING ABOUT OUR TRAUMATIC FRIENDSHIPS AND CHILDHOODS"
Hosts: Tana Mongeau & Trisha Paytas
Date: August 25, 2025
Overview
In this heartfelt and unfiltered episode, Tana and Trisha dive deep into their turbulent friendships, chaotic childhoods, and journeys through internet fame. Both hosts reflect on the toxic cycles of LA influencer culture, setting boundaries, and the process of healing from their respective family traumas. The episode is filled with candid stories—sometimes hilarious, sometimes raw—on their personal growth, complex party dynamics, and how their internet personas both protected and isolated them. The discussion is bookended by heartfelt advice to listeners navigating similar struggles and one especially touching listener call celebrating a long-awaited pregnancy.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
The LA Party Scene, Sobriety & Boundaries
- Tana talks about re-entering the LA social scene after being away and finding it draining, especially as a sober person now. She describes the overwhelming obligation to attend big events and support friends, but the desire for smaller, more meaningful gatherings.
- Trisha reflects on not needing to prove social presence. She feels content with intimate settings and supports friends as much as feels genuine (06:35).
- Both discuss how influencer parties oscillate between fun networking and intense, “clout-hungry” energy (10:44).
- On being sober at events:
“I think it's harder without alcohol to have conversations that you genuinely don't want to have.”
—Tana (08:15)
Facing Triggers from the Past (Internet Drama & Friendships Gone Wrong)
- Trisha confides about being triggered by seeing people from her past online, even in passing:
“Sometimes you just see a person even online, and I like, weirdly get triggered.”
—Trisha (13:17) - Tana shares being “fighting demons” not to revert to old behaviors when confronted with public lies about her, referencing the ongoing Dobrik/Jeff/Todd storyline. She expresses frustration when people “lie on something that I just told the truth about” (13:55).
- Both dissect the futility of public disputes and the emotional effort it takes to remain at peace rather than react.
“Choosing peace is so much harder, but you feel better... the lies are awful, but the peace you feel, so much better.”
—Trisha (17:02)
Navigating Family Trauma & Escaping Toxic Homes
- Tana details the nightmare of living with narcissistic parents while finding internet success as a teenager (43:43).
- Her parents tried to block her from traveling for work/events and attempted to control her finances.
- On the pivotal moment of leaving home:
“My 18th birthday was just the best day ever. That was kind of like where I finally was like, oh my God, I'm free.”
—Tana (45:33)
- There’s honest conversation about how internet fame provided an escape route from their homes and environments that didn’t believe in them.
- Family’s appreciation changed when money came in, but it was transactional, not real support (45:58).
Nostalgia & Reflection on Content Creation
- Both hosts reminisce about their early YouTube days and how storytimes, clickbait, and drama shaped their lives and careers.
- Trisha recalls being invited to meet Quentin Tarantino due to her YouTube presence (37:05).
- Tana recalls working retail while building her channel, using her first big AdSense check as proof she could “make it” despite family skepticism (39:31).
- They reflect on the pressures and insecurities of “clout-chasing” and constantly seeking validation online (35:08).
- Tana:
“It was almost insecurity-driven too. Like, what if this goes away? ... Now I'm more so like, what's meant for me will happen.”
—Tana (35:08)
- Tana:
Personal Growth, Setting Healthy Patterns & Relationships
- Both discuss the evolution from drama-driven, reactionary online personas to prioritizing peace, stability, and authenticity.
- On the importance of calm and supportive partners:
- Both praise Moses and Makoa (their respective partners) for their grounding influence (29:10).
- Tana:
“He’s so calm that it reminds me...Sometimes you need that reminder to just take a minute.”
—Tana (29:10)
- They highlight the importance of self-awareness, learning not to react impulsively, and seeking healthy coping habits.
Iconic YouTube & Influencer Era Gossip
- Wild YouTube Storytime Titles:
- Both laugh about the outlandish storytime video titles (“Uber drivers tried to kill you, Tana?”) and how everyone copied those trends (48:11).
- Recognition of how sensationalized storytelling shaped algorithmic and financial rewards.
Processing Drama Differently Now
- Both discuss how, with age and experience, they rarely feel compelled to react at length to callouts or lies.
- On letting things go and not impulsively airing everything online:
“I originally made a TikTok, and it’s in my drafts…I’m very happy I did not post it.”
—Tana (26:15)
- On letting things go and not impulsively airing everything online:
- They prefer discussing nuance and context, and—if they do respond—doing so with intention rather than emotional outburst (56:12).
Listener Call: Manifesting a Pregnancy (76:09)
- Listener shares her positive pregnancy test and how Trisha’s posts inspired her manifestation journey.
- Both hosts express deep gratitude for connections with fans and offer encouragement for making friends and building community in new life stages.
- “The phases of life where you don’t have maybe the girlfriends and stuff, they will come.” —Tana (77:45)
- “This is the best time…getting excited, it is the best…especially when you wanted it for so long.” —Trisha (78:06)
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
Tana on the LA Scene:
“I've been gone on tour, so I just really, like, have been out of the LA scene. And, like, I'm back in LA and I'm trying to, like, honestly reintegrate myself into my life.”
(04:28)
On Toxic Social Media Era:
“I was tornadoing my way through life was just... everything was for the plot, and I was insane. Why? If I was gonna lie about someone, I would lie about Jeff Bezos.”
—Tana (15:28)
On Growth and Letting Go:
“Choosing peace is so much harder. But you feel better. Ah, the lies are awful…But the piece you feel like, so much better to not have to…Like, it’s so true.”
—Trisha (17:09)
Tana’s Family Trauma:
“They didn't want to, you know, not have credit for my win or not take advantage or money...”
—Tana (45:58)
On Validation & Content Creation:
“It wasn't the money. It was like the validation of, like, I know this is working and it doesn't matter, and these people have told me every day I'm not gonna make it at this and to stop doing it.”
—Tana (39:56)
On Reactivity and Growth:
“There have been times in my life where you come on camera, and you're like being so calculated and you're thinking about what everyone's going to say...and it's like that doesn't make for good content either.”
—Tana (59:04)
Listener Call – Manifestation to Pregnancy:
“Although I don't have real life girlfriends, Trish and Tana really have been two influences in my life that I just look to for a laugh and a giggle. And you make my life better. And I just wanted to share my positive news with you…”
—Listener “Devin” (76:09)
Trisha on Supportive Friendship:
“It is like having, like, a little sister or a little me or something…You are such a, like, light, like, and little me.”
—Trisha (60:34)
Important Timestamps
| Timestamp | Topic/Segment | |------------|--------------------------------------------------------------------| | 03:06 | Explanting breast implants and health implications | | 04:25 | Tana’s LA party fatigue & shifting social priorities | | 08:15 | Sober socializing and draining networking at events | | 13:17 | Being triggered by past online relationships | | 13:55 | Tana discusses struggles not to react to public lies | | 17:02 | Choosing peace over conflict online | | 29:10 | The grounding influence of supportive partners | | 35:08 | Clout-chasing, insecurity, and transitioning to acceptance | | 39:31 | Early days of YouTube, viral AdSense money, and family resistance | | 45:33 | Turning 18 and gaining freedom from controlling parents | | 56:12 | On thoughtful reactions vs. impulsivity online | | 76:09 | Listener call: Pregnancy and manifestation |
Tone & Vibe
- The mood is warm, confessional, playful, and honest—with both hosts moving fluidly between unfiltered gossip, hard-won wisdom, and mutual support.
- Laughter punctuates some of the heaviest topics, and the chemistry between Tana and Trisha is one of comfort, hype, and unwavering acceptance.
- Both are candid about the ongoing work it takes to maintain their mental health and how much their online community (and each other) mean to them.
Final Thoughts
This episode is an emotionally raw snapshot into the real lives of two influential creators—showcasing their meteoric rise, the costs of internet fame, the challenges of outgrowing old circles (and old selves), and building peace after chaos. For fans navigating family trauma, toxic friendships, or seeking community online, it's equally validating and reassuring. And for anyone just here for the gossip and giggles—there’s plenty of that, too.