Full OCD Recovery: Fence Sitting In OCD Recovery

Summary

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Podcast Summary: OCD Recovery with Ali Greymond

Episode Title: Full OCD Recovery: Fence Sitting In OCD Recovery
Date: December 8, 2025
Host: Ali Greymond, OCD Specialist & Author

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Main Theme & Purpose

This episode centers on the concept of "fence sitting" in OCD recovery—a situation where one is indecisive, wavering between disregarding intrusive thoughts and engaging in compulsions. Ali Greymond explores why this indecision hinders full recovery, how to recognize it, and the importance of consistently choosing to disregard OCD content rather than letting anxiety dictate actions.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Understanding Fence Sitting in OCD Recovery

• Definition: Fence sitting is when you want to recover but still engage in compulsions as soon as the anxiety intensifies, refusing to fully commit to disregarding OCD thoughts.
• Analogy: "If you imagine the fence, you're kind of, you know, on both sides. You're not picking a side." (Ali Greymond, 00:18)
• Effect: Sends mixed signals to the brain, causing confusion about what is important and stalling genuine recovery.

2. The Brain Needs Clear Direction

• The brain asks: “Are we disregarding? Are we paying attention? Is this important?” (Ali Greymond, 00:52)
• Consistency in response trains the brain to recognize intrusive thoughts as unimportant, speeding up progress toward recovery.

3. How to Handle Intrusive Thoughts

• Regardless of the content, intensity, or emotion associated with the thought (harm OCD, urges, feelings, etc.), the response must be: “I’m choosing to disregard. I’m not taking this seriously.” (Ali Greymond, 01:15)
• “End of story.” The content does not matter; the decision to disregard is what counts.

4. Perfection Not Required—Majority Response Matters

• Ali notes that everyone will sometimes “go where the wind blows” and react to OCD thoughts (01:51).
• The critical point is that most reactions should be the correct signal (“disregard”), not perfect consistency.

5. Tracking Progress & Avoiding Chronic OCD

• Rumination tracking is emphasized—not as a nagging task, but as a tool to help progressively reduce the time spent buying into compulsions and fence sitting.
• “You can be like on the fence for years. And this is how people stay in a chronic OCD state ... they feed it just enough to keep it on life support.” (Ali Greymond, 02:38)
• Full recovery requires moving from “managing” OCD to eliminating fence sitting completely.

6. Ali’s Experience with Clients

• Many clients come to Ali in one of two states:
  • Complete crisis, or
  • “Not bad, but ... not good”—managing, but not recovered due to ongoing fence sitting.
• The focus of her work is ending chronic indecision to achieve full recovery.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On clarity over ambivalence:

  • “Your brain doesn’t know which way to go. Captain, which way do we go?”
    Ali Greymond, 00:52

• On choosing to disregard:

  • “Regardless if I feel like I need to take it seriously, I’m choosing to actively not take it serious. End of story.”
    Ali Greymond, 01:32

• On imperfection in recovery:

  • “There’s not no perfection in OCD recovery, right? Just you do the best you can...”
    Ali Greymond, 02:03

• On the danger of long-term fence sitting:

  • “You feed it just enough to keep it on life support. And this is what I work with clients on—get it away from the life support and get it finished.”
    Ali Greymond, 02:38

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Key Timestamps

• 00:14 – What is fence sitting in OCD recovery?
• 00:52 – How mixed signals confuse the brain.
• 01:15 – How to consistently respond to intrusive thoughts.
• 01:40 – Difference between commitment and going “wherever the wind blows.”
• 02:03 – Reminder: Perfection is not the goal.
• 02:38 – Chronic fence sitting and how it stalls recovery.
• 03:26 – Client examples and getting to full recovery.

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Episode Tone & Takeaway

Ali delivers this episode in her signature direct, practical, and motivating style, drawing on her personal and professional experience. Her key message: Consistency and a firm stance in response to intrusive thoughts are vital for moving beyond chronic OCD and achieving full recovery.

For anyone feeling stuck "on the fence," Ali's guidance is clear: choose to disregard OCD thoughts—every time, as often as you can—and track your progress toward freedom.

Transcript

[A]

Ali.

[B]

I'm Ali Graymond. I'm an expert in OCD recovery because for the last 19 years, I've been helping people fully recover from OCD. If you would like to do personal coaching with me, all the information is on younhubocd.com you can sign up from there.

[A]

Let's talk about fence sitting more in OCD recovery. So what is fence sitting? Fence sitting is when one day you're like, I'm going to choose to disregard. And then as soon as things get hard, as soon as you actually get an OCD thought, you're like, well, wait a minute, this is too intense. I got to take it seriously. And on one side you want to recover, but on the other side you're doing compulsions. So if you imagine the fence, you're kind of, you know, on both sides. You're not picking a side. When that happens, your brain.

Doesn'T know which way to go. Captain, which way do we go? Are we disregarding? Are we paying attention? Is this important? These thoughts, are they important or are they not important? You need to give clear direction to the brain. So every time the thought comes in, let's say you have, I don't know, harm OCD thoughts. So anytime you're getting a harm OCD thought, it doesn't matter the content, it doesn't matter what it said, it doesn't matter how it said it came in real, felt like you were going to do it. Feel, felt the urge, the feeling, what, the sensation, whatever. It's about my harm theme done. I'm choosing to disregard. I'm not taking this seriously. Regardless if I feel like I need to take it seriously, I'm choosing to actively not take it serious. End of story.

That's picking a side of the fence. But if you're going wherever the wind blows, like, oh, it felt real, gotta react, right? The more. And again.

You are going to do it from time to time. You are going to go where the wind blows. But.

Overwhelming majority needs to be correct signals to the brain. So the brain needs to see that, okay, most of the time, right? It's not, there's not no perfection in OCD recovery, right? Just you do the best you can, but you need to be.

At least somewhat in the beginning and then more so as your anxiety decreases and as you keep going, showing clear signal to the brain that this thought is no longer important. So let's say if today you bought into it, 50, 50, 50% disregarded, 50% bought into it, tomorrow needs to be a little less. And this is why we're doing rumination tracking. It's not to annoy you, it's to reduce. You need to be constantly reducing because this fence sitting, you can be like on the fence for years. And this is how people stay in a chronic OCD state where let's say they got it to a point where they're not spiraling, right? So they are on the good side of the fence enough where they're balancing it out somewhat, but they're not getting anywhere in terms of full recovery because they're. They feed it just enough to keep it on life support. And this is what I work with clients on this to keep get it away from the life support and get it finished. Clients come to me usually either in the situation of complete crisis or in the situation of this kind of.

I'm not bad, but I'm also not good. And I am, you know, managing, but I'm not fully recovered. And my job is to get them to full recovery. And a lot of it is this, this getting rid of the fence sitting.

[B]

Thank you for listening. If you have not subscribed, please subscribe. If you would like to do private coaching with me, please sign up through you have ocd.com I'll see you tomorrow.