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Podcast Summary

Podcast Overview

Podcast: OCD Recovery
Host: Ali Greymond
Episode: Use "Maybe, Maybe Not" Technique Correctly
Date: June 4, 2025

In this episode, Ali Greymond focuses on a core technique in OCD recovery: the "Maybe, Maybe Not" method. She addresses the common misunderstanding between how therapists intend this tool to be used and how clients often interpret it. Drawing from her 19 years of experience as an OCD recovery coach and her personal recovery journey, Ali clarifies the correct application of this technique and its role in reducing OCD rumination.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. The Gap in Interpretation of "Maybe, Maybe Not" (00:23–01:19)

Therapists use "Maybe, maybe not" as a light, almost dismissive response to intrusive OCD thoughts.
- Ali explains: Therapists are coming from a place of certainty when they say, "Maybe, maybe not," intending it as a casual brush-off.
Clients, however, often interpret this as needing to genuinely accept the worst-case scenario their OCD presents.
- Ali says:
  “The client is thinking that I have to actually accept the possibility that I may have killed somebody and forgot, or that I may be whatever, whatever their theme is. So they're interpreting it in an entirely different way.” [01:10]

2. Intended Use: A Tool to Dismiss, Not Accept (01:20–02:12)

The goal is not to force yourself to accept the extreme scenarios posed by OCD. Trying to do so only fuels the disorder.
- Ali’s insight:
  “If you could in some way accept it, OCD will just one up itself and one up itself and more and more until … you won't be able to accept it just from moral perspective.” [01:28]
The technique is a means to refuse engagement with ruminations, not to validate them.
- Ali clarifies:
  “You don't need to play this game. All you need to do is say, sure, maybe, maybe not, and ignore.” [01:40]

3. The True Purpose: Reducing Rumination (02:13–02:52)

When used properly, "Maybe, maybe not" is intended to cut short the cycle of OCD rumination.
Viewing it as sarcasm or a joke rather than a serious acceptance is often more effective.
- Ali elaborates:
  “All it is is a tool to reduce rumination, to say something to the OCD, to laugh at it, to be sarcastic, and then to refuse rumination. At the end of the day, that's what we're trying to do here because rumination feeds the disorder.” [02:24]

4. Common Pitfalls in Application (02:13–02:52)

Many clients struggle because they apply the technique too literally, expecting to achieve unconditional acceptance, and get stuck.
- Ali observes:
  “A lot of the times clients will come to me and they're like, I'm trying to do unconditional acceptance. I'm trying to do maybe, maybe not. And it doesn't make sense. It's not working because they're using it … very literally.” [02:17]

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

Ali Greymond on therapist intent:
“… as if you want to say to OCD, like, sure, sure, and then go on with the day. So that sure is the same as maybe, maybe not.” [00:56]
On the escalation of OCD themes:
“Eventually it will hit a point where you won't be able to accept it.” [01:33]
On reducing rumination:
“At the end of the day, that's what we're trying to do here because rumination feeds the disorder.” [02:36]
Summing up the technique:
“The point of saying those things is to ignore. It's not to accept the worst case scenario.” [01:46]

Important Timestamps

| Time | Segment | |-------|-------------------------------------------| | 00:23 | The disconnect between therapist and client interpretation of "Maybe, maybe not" | | 01:10 | Client's misconception about acceptance | | 01:28 | The endless escalation if you try to accept OCD’s fears | | 02:17 | Common pitfalls: overly literal use | | 02:24 | Correct usage: sarcasm and refusal to ruminate | | 02:36 | “Rumination feeds the disorder” |

Summary

In this short but impactful episode, Ali Greymond demystifies the "Maybe, maybe not" technique for OCD recovery. Her key message is that this phrase is meant as a dismissive, almost sarcastic response to OCD’s intrusive thoughts—a tool to defuse rumination, not to force genuine acceptance of fantastical fears. By understanding and applying this approach as therapists intend, listeners can break the cycle of OCD rumination and take meaningful steps toward recovery.

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Transcript1 lines

[00:00]
A
Ali. I'm Ali Graymond. I'm an expert in OCD recovery because for the last 19 years, I've been helping people fully recover from OCD. If you would like to do personal coaching with me, all the information is on younhubocd.com you can sign up from there. Today, I wanted to talk to you about the big disconnect between what the therapist says when they say maybe, maybe not, and what the patient hears, hears when the therapist says maybe, maybe not. Because the, the gap between the two is huge. When the therapist says to you maybe, maybe not, you have killed somebody and forgot, obviously the therapist knows maybe not. The therapist is 100% certain maybe not. So they're saying it from the perspective of almost like as if you want to say to ocd, like, sure, sure, and then go on with the day. So that sure is the same as maybe, maybe not. It's not that you're actually saying, yes, sure, this happened. You're saying, yeah, nice try, sure, I'm going on. That's how the therapist is meaning it. But the client is thinking that I have to actually accept the possibility that I may have killed somebody and forgot, or that I may be whatever, whatever their theme is. So they're interpreting it in an entirely different way. You don't need to accept your worst case scenario that your OCD says, because all that's going to happen is if you, let's say, if you could in some way accept it, OCD will just one up itself and one up itself and more and more until the point where you won't be able to accept it just from moral perspective. Eventually it will hit a point where you won't be able to accept it. So you don't need to play this game. All you need to do is say, sure, maybe, maybe not, and ignore. The point of saying those things is to ignore. It's not to accept the worst case scenario. So you have to understand the reasoning behind and the intended meaning with which it comes. Okay? Because it's very, very important. Because a lot of the times clients will come to me and they're like, I'm trying to do unconditional acceptance. I'm trying to do maybe, maybe not. And it doesn't make sense. It's not working because they're using it as very literally, where all it is is a tool to reduce rumination, to say something to the ocd, to laugh at it, to be sarcastic, and then to refuse rumination. At the end of the day, that's what we're trying to do here because rumination feeds the disorder. Thank you for listening. If you have not subscribed, please subscribe. If you would like to do private coaching with me, please sign up through you have ocd dot com. I'll see you tomorrow.