Podcast Summary: Offline with Jon Favreau — "Are Men Okay?" (October 16, 2025)

Episode Overview

In this thought-provoking episode of Offline with Jon Favreau, Jon sits down with Dr. Zach Seidler, a clinical psychologist and Director of Men's Health Research at Movember. The conversation examines the state of young men’s health in a digital world, exploring how online influencers, shifting social dynamics, loneliness, and traditional gender norms intertwine to shape young men’s identities, politics, relationships, and overall well-being. The episode also features a compelling opening monologue by Jon reflecting on masculinity, strength, and the meaning of American ideals through the stories of two very different men, and unpacks new research from Movember about men’s mental, physical, and social health today.

Key Topics and Discussion Points

1. Monologue: Two Stories About American Masculinity and Strength

(00:30 – 12:09)

• Contrasting Fates: Jon opens by telling the stories of JD Vance (Vice President, emblematic of right-wing grievance and exclusion) and George Reddes (a young veteran who suffered a civil rights abuse by the government yet responds with grace and belief in American ideals).

• Reflection on Strength and Values:

  • Jon highlights the distinction between "us versus them" masculinities and the inclusive, resilient response of George Reddes:

    “I want my sons to be more like George Reddes. I want my party and my country to fight for what people like George Reddes deserve... Having the courage to speak out... not for your own benefit... but for the sake of people you may not know but still hope to protect." — Jon Favreau (11:20)

• Context for Young Men and Politics:

  • Ponders the 2024 election analysis focusing on young men and the call for Democrats to adopt a more "tough guy" persona to appeal to them.
  • Emphasizes the type of strength he wishes to model—resilience, empathy, and community, rather than dominance.

2. Movember and Redefining Men's Health

(14:44 – 18:36)

• Movember's Mission:
  Dr. Zach Seidler explains Movember’s origins as a “walking, talking billboard” for men’s health—beginning with mustaches and evolving into a global movement focused on helping men and boys lead healthier lives.

  • “We always talk about health by stealth… we’re not going to hit you over the head with the message. We're going to use banter and humor as an entry point.” — Dr. Zach Seidler (15:04)

• Navigating Political Tensions Around Men’s Issues:

  • Movember positions itself outside the typical culture war binary, focused on action not ideology.
  • "You're either a Trojan horse for feminism... or you're secretly men's rights activists... We're neither of those things. We are here on the ground to just make shit happen." — Dr. Zach Seidler (17:52)

3. Dr. Seidler’s Personal Journey

(18:37 – 22:11)

• Why This Work:
  • Dr. Seidler became a men’s mental health advocate after losing his father to suicide. He notes both the “joy and meaning” in addressing male mental health, despite its heaviness.
  • “I always say that I do what I do because of how he lived, not because of how he died.” — Dr. Zach Seidler (21:37)
  • He connects his personal story to broader themes of masculinity, vulnerability, and the need to model better options for men.

4. Research on Young Men, the Digital World, and Influencers

(22:11 – 36:48)

• Study: Young Men’s Health in the Digital World
  • Surveyed 3,000 young men (16-25) in US, UK, Australia about digital habits and masculinity narratives.
  • Motivations for Engaging with Online Masculinity Influencers:
    • Most are driven by entertainment, self-development, and optimism—not openly by misogyny or grievance.
    • “They don't come looking for misogyny, but they leave with it.” — Dr. Zach Seidler (25:57)
    • Many influencers offer both positive and negative messages, with a spectrum from innocuous advice to harmful content.
    • The "algorithm as mirror" theory is challenged; Seidler believes it shapes more than reflects:

      "The algorithm is dictating; it's telling them slowly but surely that this is who they should be… I just don't think that is what the value system is at their very core." — Dr. Zach Seidler (30:10; repeated sentiment from [01:14])

  • Paradoxical Effects of Manosphere Content:
    • Short-term optimism and agency, but over time, increased loneliness, risky behaviors, and feelings of unattainable standards.
    • "Reality then hits them when they cannot reach the standard of manhood... because it’s unattainable.” — Dr. Zach Seidler (26:57)
  • Stereotypes Debunked:
    • Most vulnerable are not "jobless guys in their basement" but typically educated, successful, white young men, often with girlfriends.

5. Connection, Loneliness, and the Illusion of Digital Community

(39:12 – 49:20)

• Illusion of Connection Online:
  • Jon and Zach discuss how social platforms and podcasts offer the “illusion of connection,” often deepening loneliness rather than alleviating it.
  • “Listening to a three-hour podcast with guys hanging out together... that's the most connective tissue they have to the world.” — Dr. Zach Seidler (41:16)
• Gender Differences in Coping with Loneliness:
  • Men and women experience loneliness at similar rates, but men are more likely to withdraw.
  • The emotional spectrum for boys is reduced as they age due to peer pressure and policing of masculinity.
  • “The saddest thing about becoming a man is that it is a process of grief and loss... their emotional spectrum is wild… And then over time, they get to 12 and suddenly they won’t touch their mates anymore.” — Dr. Zach Seidler (41:59)

6. Socialization, Friendship, and the Perception Gap

(49:20 – 51:11)

• Perception Gap:

  • Many men believe their peers expect breadwinner or “tough guy” roles, but this is often a pluralistic ignorance; most do not actually hold those views.
  • The “locker room misunderstood joke” phenomenon perpetuates toxic silence and complicity.
  • “It's like, where do we learn and build that skill set over time as something that is essential?” — Dr. Zach Seidler (47:30)

• Parental Hopes and Limits:

  • Jon shares his hopes of maintaining emotional openness with his sons, but Zach cautions peer influence outweighs even progressive parenting.

7. Masculinity, Politics, and the Rightward Shift

(55:57 – 64:10)

• Why Young Men Move Right Politically:
  • Right-wing politics currently offers certainty, especially economic, and space to discuss status, ambition, and traditional roles, even if only superficially.
  • The left, Dr. Seidler says, has often responded by shaming or excluding men’s traditional values and not meeting their needs for inclusion:

    “We’re not going to throw out the baby with the bath water… If we don’t find that middle ground of inclusion... I’m very worried.” — Dr. Zach Seidler (58:54)

  • Obama’s appeal to young men, they agree, stemmed from his willingness to live in “the gray,” acknowledge mistakes, and blend traditional strength with vulnerability.
• Misguided Political Advice:
  • Attempts by Democrats to simply mimic “tough guy” podcast culture will fail—young men value authenticity and nuance.

8. The Real Face of Men's Health—New Movember Report

(64:10 – 69:00)

• Alarming Statistics:

  • In the US, over 53% of men die before age 75; even worse outcomes for Black and Native Alaskan men.
  • Suicide rates stay stubbornly high and even increase with age among white men, unique among demographics.
  • Main driver: A lack of meaning, loss of community, and failing social connection, not just mental illness or substance misuse.

• Call to Action:

  • Health, not partisan ideology, should anchor men’s policy.
  • “Health is the way into a bipartisan solution… No one wants their men and boys dying too young.” — Dr. Zach Seidler (71:00)

9. Closing Thoughts and Resources

(71:36 – end)

• Practical Advice:
  • Encourage connection through small steps: text weekly, call monthly, see friends quarterly—simple habits for better well-being.
  • “Bringing your community, bring your mates… have a barbecue, talk about something real.” — Dr. Zach Seidler (72:06)
• Get Involved:
  • For more research and resources: movember.com and the Movember Institute of Men's Health Substack.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “They don’t come looking for misogyny, but they leave with it.”
  — Dr. Zach Seidler, [25:57]
• “The ‘algorithm as a mirror’ thing is bullshit. It isn’t just reflecting—it's shaping you.”
  — Dr. Zach Seidler, [01:14] & [30:10]
• “The saddest thing about becoming a man is that it is a process of grief and loss.”
  — Dr. Zach Seidler, [41:59]
• “I want my sons to see strength as a measure of how you handle life's most difficult moments… Do you pull up the ladder behind you or drop it down for the next person?”
  — Jon Favreau, [10:10]
• “No one wants to feel the burden of having to care for someone with ill health. So on an emotional level, this goes beyond politics.”
  — Dr. Zach Seidler, [70:56]

Timestamps for Important Segments

• 00:30 – 12:09: Jon’s monologue on masculinity, politics, and the George Reddes story
• 14:44 – 18:36: Dr. Seidler introduces Movember and its mission
• 18:37 – 22:11: Dr. Seidler’s personal story and philosophy
• 22:11 – 36:48: Research into online masculinity influencers and young men’s digital lives
• 39:12 – 49:20: The illusion of online connection and gender differences in loneliness
• 49:20 – 51:11: Friendship, the perception gap, and social skills for men
• 55:57 – 64:10: Political implications & the rightward shift of young men
• 64:10 – 69:00: New Movember report findings and men’s health disparities
• 71:36 – end: Closing thoughts and resources

Takeaways

• The narrative about young men and the internet is more nuanced than prevailing alarmism.
• Online masculinity influencers reach young men as entertainers and mentors, but algorithms can reinforce harmful content and isolation.
• Men’s emotional and social needs are under-served, leading to dangerous cycles of loneliness and unattainable ideals.
• Solutions require both individual skills (connection, vulnerability) and societal change (policy, realistic role models, and inclusive political discourse).
• Health, community, and compassion—not just “strength”—should be central to how we define successful masculinity and political engagement with men.

Resources

• Movember: movember.com
• Movember Institute of Men's Health Substack: Linked on Movember site

For listeners seeking to understand the complex pressures facing men today—online, in politics, and in their own relationships—this episode provides clarity, empathy, and hope, grounded in rigorous research and personal experience.