Bridget Bahl: The Diagnosis That Changed Everything (The Reality She Wasn’t Prepared For and the Perspective It Gave Her)

Summary

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Podcast Summary: On Purpose with Jay Shetty

Episode: Bridget Bahl: The Diagnosis That Changed Everything

Date: April 29, 2026
Host: Jay Shetty (with co-host Radhi Devlukia-Shetty)
Guest: Bridget Bahl – Entrepreneur & Founder of The Bar

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Episode Overview

This heartfelt episode follows the life-changing journey of Bridget Bahl, a fashion entrepreneur who was diagnosed with breast cancer shortly after her wedding. Jay Shetty and Radhi Devlukia-Shetty guide Bridget through an intimate and real-time reflection on her diagnosis, treatment, grief, purpose, and personal transformation. The episode is both a candid account of the realities of cancer and a powerful meditation on purpose, faith, relationships, and self-compassion.

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Table of Contents

1. Bridget’s Diagnosis & Sharing Her Journey
2. Surviving vs. Living: Raw Reflections on the Experience
3. The Impact of Cancer on Identity & Career
4. Faith, Surrender, and Speaking with God
5. Relationships, Partnership, and the "Husband List"
6. Grief, Survivor's Guilt, and Processing the Aftermath
7. Advice for Others: Cancer, Support, and Self-Exams
8. The Meaning of Beauty, Confidence, and Living with Gratitude
9. Purpose and the Future
10. Key Quotes & Memorable Moments

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1. Bridget’s Diagnosis & Sharing Her Journey

• Bridget talks about being diagnosed with breast cancer just after her wedding, while undergoing fertility treatments (IVF).

• She immediately faced existential questions:

  “My first question was, am I going to die? And my second question was, is all of my hair going to fall out?”
  — Bridget Bahl, 02:21

• Despite treatment, she continued to share her journey publicly, especially on Instagram, inspiring women to get checked and raising awareness.

• She was motivated by impact:

  “People have wrote me and said, like, wow, Bridget. I went in, I got checked, because I’ve been watching your Instagram, and I have breast cancer, but I have stage one, and I’m not gonna have to go to chemotherapy. And so I just feel really, like, honored.”
  — Bridget, 05:59

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2. Surviving vs. Living: Raw Reflections on the Experience

[04:54 – 12:14]

• Bridget shares that the first 15 months after her diagnosis were spent in “survival mode,” especially during chemotherapy.

  “You’re, like, trying to get through to the next moment… someone said to me, hour by hour, like, you’re that sick?”

• She discusses “grieving her old life” as she starts to feel safe in her body again.

• Survivor’s guilt arises:

  “I’m only letting myself grieve for, what, 15 seconds at a time, and I’m like, oh, I should just be so happy that I’m alive… but I’m… struggling a lot with that right now, the survivor’s guilt.”
  — Bridget, 09:15

• On “ringing the bell” to signify the end of treatment, Bridget delayed it, feeling the pressure to appear healed:

  “…the only thing that got me to ring it was I was like, maybe it’s not about me. Maybe every time I would be at treatment and I would hear someone ring it, it would spark such a joy in me.”

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3. The Impact of Cancer on Identity & Career

[12:42 – 19:47]

• Pre-diagnosis, Bridget was immersed in hustle culture (“more is more”). Cancer “stopped her in her tracks.”
• Details her IVF journey, the impact of age on fertility, and discovering the lump mid-treatment.
• Self-exams:
  She describes discovering a lump while going through IVF, the skepticism because it didn’t feel like a “hard marble” (as commonly described), and advocates for knowing your body’s normal baseline.

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4. Faith, Surrender, and Speaking with God

[20:26 – 24:47, 66:07 – 67:26]

• Powerfully frames her approach to illness and adversity through faith:

  “I went through a phase in my life where I felt like I really hit rock bottom. And I, I just went to God in a really sincere moment and was like, OK, my way doesn’t work. I’m finally ready to admit that. Like, I want to try it your way.”
  — Bridget, 21:13

• On her ongoing relationship to faith:

  “Now I’m, like, in constant comms with God. Like, he is sick of me. Like, he’s like this girl… I, like, feel, feel like I have that relationship, and that’s like, what changed for me.”
  — Bridget, 20:26

• She emphasizes that storms come to everyone, but her choice is to “do it with God.”

• Daily talks with God are “really raw”:

  “I’m kind of just. I think he’s sick of me… Don’t want to hear from her anymore?”
  — Bridget, 66:23

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5. Relationships, Partnership, and the "Husband List"

[44:19 – 50:51, 54:44 – 60:13]

• Bridget describes her marriage with Mike, a plastic surgeon, and how he supported her—personally and professionally—through the illness.

• “Choose your husband like your life depends on it”: emphasizes the importance of character over superficial qualities.

• Her “husband list” included values like “does he love his mom?”, “does he care about people?,” and “does he have friends?”—not just career or looks.

• The “peaceful relationship” felt unfamiliar at first but proved foundational:

  “It was always easy with him. Everything to the extent that I was like, oh, am I, like, not interested in this?… But thank God I had that list, because he’s not breaking anything on the list.”
  — Bridget, 47:41

• Reflections on the difference between stress/excitement (“butterflies”) in early dating and the safe, consistent love that sustains in adversity.

• Jay and Radhi share their own experiences about what matters most in a partner: how someone “lights up a room,” supports you during hard times, and doesn’t play games.

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6. Grief, Survivor's Guilt, and Processing the Aftermath

[67:13 – 71:36]

• Bridget discusses the tension of holding both grief and gratitude:

  “I don’t think I know how to do both at the same time. When I was really sick, I wasn’t grieving yet because I was so scared…I think the grief is coming more now because I feel more safe now.”
  — Bridget, 67:26

• She recognizes the “before and after” line in the sand cancer draws in a person’s life and is figuring out how to move forward while acknowledging the loss of her previous self.

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7. Advice for Others: Cancer, Support, and Self-Exams

[37:22 – 43:32, 40:30 – 43:32]

• Bridget passionately urges everyone (especially women) to do regular self-exams and to know their baseline, as early detection can be life-saving:

  “If you’re listening to this and you’re hearing this, like, just right ahead, right now, just like, let’s have a feel... Any change, and then you get checked, and you don’t let yourself put it off because it’s scary.”
  — Bridget, 37:31

• On supporting someone with cancer:
  The best thing is to “keep loving on them”—consistent, low-pressure check-ins mean everything, even when the person can’t respond.

  “When I think of people now, I make sure I text them that day. I don’t care if they write me back or not… You don’t know what someone else is going through.”
  — Bridget, 41:00

• Practical help is invaluable: grocery runs, laundry, supporting childcare.

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8. The Meaning of Beauty, Confidence, and Living with Gratitude

[39:13 – 40:13; 62:29 – 65:37]

• Cancer shifted her body image perspective; she now sees beauty as “leading with her heart.”
• She references seeing a woman “fiercely” dressed up for chemo as inspiring her to do the same, finding confidence and presence even in sickness.
• On thin hair and self-criticism:

  “I always thought my hair was so thin… I can’t wait for my thin hair to come back.”
  — Bridget, 32:52

• Advocates making promises to oneself (like showing up and getting dressed) as an act of self-belief and restoration of confidence.

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9. Purpose and the Future

[72:00 – end]

• Bridget is still discovering what the next chapter of her life will look like but feels drawn to continue supporting and inspiring others.
• Jay and Radhi remind her (and listeners) that sometimes we’re “already living the next phase of your life without even knowing it.”
• Best advice received:

  “This too shall pass… be present in that moment, but also stay humble in that moment, because this too shall pass.”
  — Bridget, 72:15

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10. Key Quotes & Memorable Moments

On Cancer’s Disruption:

“Cancer will stop you right in your tracks.”
— Bridget, 12:44

On Survivor’s Guilt:

“I’m trying to figure out the balance of honoring what I went through… but also, like, I lived.”
— Bridget, 09:15

On Self-Exams & Early Detection:

“There is no...instance with this where finding out sooner is a bad thing.”
— Bridget, 37:31

On Faith & Surrender:

“I’ve tried to do it without God and I’ve done it with God...the storm’s coming either way. This is my cross to bear, but you have yours, and everyone’s going through something.”
— Bridget, 24:47

On Partnership & Character:

“Chaos reveals character.”
— Bridget, 45:12

On Gratitude:

“What’s the best thing that can happen?…Instead of always trying to figure it out…just let him do something.”
— Bridget, 05:59

On Beauty:

“To lead with my heart and really make people feel a certain way…would be something I found really beautiful.”
— Bridget, 39:16

On Grief & Healing:

“I don’t think my mind could really open all those doors…when you’re so sick.”
— Bridget, 09:15

On the Importance of the Right Partner:

“The guy who is not texting you back is not the guy with you in the middle of the night in the emergency room.”
— Bridget, 50:29

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Timestamps of Major Segments

• Diagnosis and Immediate Perspective Shift: [02:21 – 08:14]
• On Grief, Survivor’s Guilt, and Recovery Mindset: [09:15 – 12:14]
• Bridget’s Backstory – Career, IVF, Finding the Lump: [12:42 – 19:47]
• Faith, Surrender, and Previous Hardships: [20:26 – 24:47]
• Support, Partnership, and “Husband List” Philosophy: [44:43 – 50:51; 54:44 – 60:13]
• Practical Advice for Cancer Support & Self-Exams: [37:22 – 43:32]
• Reflections on Beauty, Meaning, and Self-Compassion: [39:13 – 40:13; 62:29 – 65:37]
• Holding Grief and Gratitude: [67:13 – 71:36]
• Best Advice Received: [72:11 – 72:56]
• Closing Reflections and Thanks: [73:00 – end]

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Final Thoughts

Bridget’s vulnerability and honesty illuminate not just the reality of cancer but also human resilience, the healing power of support, the evolution of identity, and the many forms of purpose. The episode is a must-listen—for those facing adversity and anyone seeking meaningful perspective on love, faith, and self-acceptance.

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Transcript

[Jay Shetty]

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[Bridget Ball]

15 I had this beautiful wedding and I had this wonderful husband and now I have breast cancer. Cancer will stop you right in your tracks. My first question was, am I going to die? And my second question was, is all of my hair going to fall out? My oncologist did say to me, you're not going to be able to carry a baby, but I still believe I will be a mom.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

You brought everyone in Your community. On that journey with you, so many people have become inspired by it. So many people have become saved by it.

[Bridget Ball]

This is my purpose.

[Jay Shetty]

Hey, everyone.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Welcome back to On Purpose, the place you come to become happier, healthier, and more healed. Today's guest is someone that I've been really looking forward to having in the seat. And I really believe that On Purpose was created to document and share and introduce you to stories like these that hopefully help inspire your own journey, help and support you in your difficult times, and give you a sense of meaning and purpose when things around you seem extremely challenging. Today, I'm joined by Bridget Ball, an entrepreneur and the founder of the fashion brand the Bar. Bridget has also built a powerful online community where she shares openly about faith, relationships, and her life.

[Jay Shetty]

Over the past year, Bridget's life took

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

an unexpected turn when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. Since then, Bridget has continued to share her journey with honesty and resilience, speaking about how experiences like this can reshape what truly matters. Please welcome to On Purpose. Bridget. Bridget, it is such a joy to have you here. I've been looking forward to this for so long. I want to, first of all, say how grateful I am that you made the trip over here. You just mentioned to me as we were walking here, this is one of the first times you've really been out of your home. I'm so thankful and appreciate you so deeply for coming. Thank you.

[Bridget Ball]

Oh, my gosh. Thank you. I feel so cool that you wanted to have me here. Yeah. So thank you for getting me out of the house and. And pushing me a little bit because I do believe that we can help people. And, yeah, I'll get more comfortable. Don't worry.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

You're doing great.

[Jay Shetty]

You're doing great. You always have the best energy.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

When we met last time, it was like you.

[Jay Shetty]

You just effortlessly create such a safe

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

space for everyone around you.

[Jay Shetty]

I wanted to ask you, for those

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

who may be meeting you for the first time, who are hopefully in my community learning about you today, how would you describe this chapter of your life and where you are right now?

[Bridget Ball]

I'm really trying to unpack everything that's happened in the past 15 months of being diagnosed with breast cancer, chemo, radiation, surgery, all of those things. And I think I was just so insanely sick for most of the time, especially during the chemotherapy portion of it, that I wasn't really present or unpacking any of it. Then you're really in survival mode. It's day by day. You're, like, trying to get through to the next moment. You know, I used to say, like, day by day, and at one point, someone said to me, hour by hour, like, you're that sick? So I feel like I'm unpacking a lot of it now, so I'm definitely really raw right now. It's not like this thing. Thing that I've had years to reflect on and see how this has all changed. Like, this is kind of happening now. Live in real time every day, and it's. It's really beautiful. And, like, I don't know. Like, there's just so many good things that came out of this. Like, it's kind of crazy to think about. I really admire you, Jay, and, like, what you do, and you really change people's lives. And before this, you know, I had a fashion career before I was on Instagram, and. And I've been an influencer. You know, before that, I was a fash PR girl. I saw you went to the St. Laurent show recently. I. I did PR at Yves St. Laurent for years. I lived the whole Devil Wears Prada life. I've had. I feel like I've had a few fashion lives, and I feel like everything was really like that movie in the sense where it was, like, belts and, like, crying and drama, and I really appreciate the discipline and everything I learned from that chapter of my life. But I never really knew that I would have an opportunity to save someone's life or, you know, speak out about something so relevant in women's health that I could really change someone's life or save someone's life, which people have wrote me and said, like, wow, Bridget. I went in. I got checked, because I've been watching your Instagram, and I have breast cancer, but I have stage one, and I'm not gonna have to go to chemotherapy. And so I just feel really, like, honored. And I feel like to whom much is given, much is expected. So I feel like I'm just trying to really honor the moment and do the best I can. And I'm really excited to meet some of the people and the women I've talked to. And one thing I. I remember, like, walking into chemo, and, like, I really. I found this quote, and I really try to live by it now, but it's. What's the best thing that can happen? So it's like, yes, I don't have anything figured out. Who really cares? Do you know what I mean? Like, what's the best thing that could happen? Let's see what God has for me. Instead of me trying to always figure it out and find the husband, put the guy in there. It's like, just, like, let him do something, you know? And, like, cancer has a lot to do with, like, control and the illusion of control, and, like, it really strips you of that. I was a control freak. I think I still am a little bit. But, like, you don't have control over it. Like, it takes that away from you. So it's like all you really have is, like, your mindset and your hope and your faith and, like, that's all I ever really had, even before cancer. I just thought I was in control before, but now I know I'm not, unfortunately. Yeah. I hope that answers the question.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

It does. It does. It's such a. I want to take a moment to just acknowledge how inspiring I think you are, because I've had many friends who've gone through the battle with cancer, and I know how hard that is, let alone having to document it and share it. And you did that. You brought everyone in your community on that journey with you, and I can't even begin to imagine how difficult it is to go through what you've been through and document and share it. And like you said, so many people have become inspired by it. So many people have become saved by it. So many people have become aware of, you know, what you go through and what others go through during this time. I wanted to ask you that now. I saw you on Instagram, and I was just talking to Mike right now, but I saw on Instagram that I think you have two more treatments left. But he was saying, one more now.

[Jay Shetty]

He just told me, I'll do it

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

for me, one more treatment left. Like, what does it feel like to be at this stage? As you said, you're not years away from it yet. It's not. Talk to me about what goes through your mind right now.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah, right now I think I'm. I'm dealing with a little bit of grief where during, you know, people would ask me, like, oh, you're grieving your old life. And I. Like, I said I was too sick to think about all of that. Like, you're really so sick. And that was one thing I. I struggled a little bit with sharing because I really wanted to share it. Especially after one person even wrote me back and was like, you saved me. Like, I. I would not have gone. And then I was like, okay, this is. This is my purpose in this. This is the only way I can understand it and make sense of it, that I can help someone else and I can keep someone else out of chemotherapy because I had a terrible time with chemotherapy. Like, I. I went in super positive, which is kind of funny, because I was like, I can do it. Like, with God, I can do all things. And I did do it, but it wasn't what I. I pictured the experience to be. But I think right now I'm. I'm definitely starting to grieve because I think right now I'm starting to feel better and I'm Start safe, and I'm starting to feel safe in my body. And I think. I think there's only so much I could tolerate at once. And when you're so sick, I don't think my mind could really open all those doors. At the same time, their survivor's guilt is such a big thing because I'm also, like, grieving, but I'm, like, only letting myself grieve for, what, 15 seconds at a time, and I'm like, oh, I should just be so happy that I'm alive. Like, so many people don't live through this. I'm so lucky. But so, like, I'm trying to figure out those sort of things, like, the balance of, like, honoring what I went through, honoring that. That was hard, and that's okay. That. That was really hard, but also, like, I lived. So I don't know. I. I'm struggling a lot with that right now, the survivor's guilt. Because even when I went to ring the bell, like, I didn't want to do it. I. I don't know why you. You would think you would be so excited to go and ring the bell. And you can ring the bell at any time. You can ring it at the end of your chemo, at the end of your radiation. I just kept putting it off and putting it off because I think I wanted to ring it when I felt like, okay, I'm gonna feel a little bit better after I ring it. So I waited and waited and waited. And then the day I was meant to do it, I told my husband, Mike, I said, I am not. I don't wanna ring it. I don't wanna ring it. And the only thing that got me to ring it was I was like, maybe it's not about me. Maybe every time I would be at. Be at treatment and I would hear someone ring it, it would spark such a joy in me. And I would be like, yes, like, so happy for that person. And so I was like, maybe that's why I have to ring it today. Maybe it's for someone else who's. Who needs to hear this bell rung. And it's not even about me because to me, it felt like a lot of pressure to ring it because then everyone just expects you. Because I think people deep down just really wanted me to be better, and I wanted to be better, but I was like, if I ring it and then I don't feel better, I'm going to be all mixed up. And that's kind of a scary, weird thing in a weird place, you know?

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Thank you for letting us into your mind right now and heart.

[Bridget Ball]

And it's a little mixed up, but that's like, kind of how it goes.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

I mean, you're very coherent in explaining it. So just for what it's worth, the way you're sharing it is actually making a lot of sense. And it's really helpful, I think, because we don't often get to talk to people in this very important moment. We talk to people like you rightly said, like years after. And then you. It's all memory, whereas right now it's all real for you and you're living through it. Talk to me about what your day to day looked like before the diagnosis. Like, what. What was your day to day like?

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah. So before, you know, the C word, cancer. Before being diagnosed with breast cancer, I was very much wrapped up in hustle culture. More is more and more. Produce more, do more, have more success, find more success, really just always pushing myself to be better and do better. And I mean, cancer will stop you right in your tracks. And it says, nope, that's not what we're going to focus on anymore. When I found the lump, I was on my sixth round of IVF. So I got married when I was 40, which I guess is later in life. We live between Dallas and New York, and it's very late in Dallas, and it's sort of okay in New York. It's kind of interesting. But we could have gotten married when I was like 38, 39, and we chose to do family planning. And there's a big difference between the amount of eggs you can get when you're 38 and when you're 40. So I was like, that's really important to me. I have always believed, and I still believe I will be a mom and Mike will be a dad. And so we were like, that's really more important to us than, like, the party. So let's do that and plan the wedding while we do that and then have that. So I did a bunch of rounds, and then I got two embryos. And then we got married and we had this, like, Beautiful, amazing wedding. I'm so into aesthetics. I love planning things. I just. It was like a really joyful, fun, cool thing we did. But I felt good going into the wedding because I'm like, okay, I have two embryos. That's like, what I'm believing and choosing to believe. So I. After we got married, I wanted to do like one or two more rounds because there really just is such a big difference. Like, I don't want to give the numbers because I'm not a doctor, but in these ages, between, like, it's 35 and up, but like, when you start hitting 38, 39, like, it's a significant difference. Like, it's like huge. The amount. Okay, we do another round of ivf. During that round of IVF is when I. I noticed a lump. And I was like, it's really crazy because when I found it, it was. And I'm a petite person, it was bigger than the size of a golf ball, so. And I wasn't sure that I even could feel it because, you know, we grow up like. Or I grew up. You know, I grew up with a single mom. And I remember in our shower, she had this little thing on your shower, and it was like these hand sketches of how to do a self breast exam. So, you know, I was doing it. You never really knew, or I really knew if I was doing it right or what, whatnot, but I felt something. I live with the doctor, so I'm like, hey, feel this. What do you feel? And he's like, oh, I'm not sure either. Like, it was bigger than a golf ball, but it was so far deep, like, deep in me. And I have dense breast tissue. It makes it harder to feel for lumps. And I had always read that it would feel like a hard marble. And it can. It can feel like a hard marble. But mine did not. You couldn't tell for sure if there was something or not in my mind. Of course, every woman would think, oh, my gosh, is it breast cancer? But I grew up in a pretty big family. My mom has five sisters. My dad had three, both of their mothers. No one has breast cancer. No one had cancer at all. And I don't have the broccoline. So it wasn't super high on my radar that, like, this is cancer. And it's very easy on a flag to just be like, I'm sure it's not. I'm sure it's the IVF medications. I'm sure it's a cyst. I found it. Or I felt something and it was on my mind and I knew I was gonna see my fertility doctor the next week. So we go in and I tell him and he's like, okay, like you have to go in for a mammogram. I'm seeing this like every week. And I was like, oh, okay. Like I still just, yeah, I'm kind of like positive. And I was kind of like, I'm sure it's fine, but like, you know, yeah, of course I'll go. So I go in for my mammogram the next week. And. Yeah, while I did my mammogram, I could start to kind of feel like something was going on and they could feel it and they were looking at it. And then they asked me that day, like, will you stay for your biopsy? Which is like odd, you know. And I was like, okay, something's wrong. And I could kind of just feel something was wrong. So I stayed for the biopsy and I, I've been blessed with angels this whole time. Like I've had a lot of angels come into my life and just like really help me. And this, it was just the sweetest radiologist ever. And she was just talking to me all about her wedding. She's like, I went on your Instagram, it was so beautiful. And she was trying to distract me. I could, she was really trying to comfort me. And all of a sudden I just looked up at her and I was like, am I going to die? And she said, I, I think you're going to need some chemotherapy. Cuz she could tell it. I had swollen lymph nodes, which means it's traveled likely. I mean, she couldn't tell. She was biopsying my lymph nodes and my breasts. So she, she said, you know, I said my first question to her was, am I going to die? And my second question very shortly after was, is all of my hair going to fall out? Which is kind of interesting. Do you know, like, am I going to die? And is all like back to back. I think that says a lot about women and our identity and, and just where I was in my life. I had this beautiful wedding and I have this wonderful husband and now I have breast cancer. And I was family planning and you know, it was never like this perfect situation. I was open about doing IVF on Instagram because that just to me it's like, I don't know how I could not talk about that. It's very consuming, you know, and I wanted to be upfront about it. And then now I'm like, oh, My gosh. I have breast cancer. Like, what? Like, yeah, so I don't remember what you're talking about.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

No, no, no, no, no. You're doing amazing. Don't. Don't stress at all. Like, thank, again, thank you for giving. You know, the. The amount of detail is. I feel like I'm living it with you. And it's. It's helpful because, again, like, I think, like you said, I'm sure there's so many women who feel something and aren't sure and let it go. Or, you know, like you said, you generally, a lot of us are positive about things, and we. We want things to just be good and probably won't happen to us. And then all of a sudden, you realize. And I remember seeing you posted this on Instagram, and I'm bringing it up because we'll put it up as well in the edit. But you put it up where it's. I think you FaceTimed Mike to tell him about this, and you had, you know, you posted, you know, our husband's reaction to finding out I have breast cancer. What was. After the first two questions you asked, what was the first thought that went through your head? And then was Mike the first person that you called as well?

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah, I mean, I was texting him the whole time I was there. It was actually really interesting. You could see our wedding venue from, like, this room they had me wait in. And I was just like, what's going on? Like, this isn't how it was supposed to be, you know? And I was just spinning. Like, I don't really even remember that that much of that day. But one of my thoughts soon after was, I'm so glad it's me and it's not my mom and it's not Mike, because at least I could do it. At least I had to go through it and be strong. I would have found that so much worse to, like. Like, I would have rather been the one going through it than, like, I don't know. I. I can do it. So.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Wow.

[Bridget Ball]

I mean, I didn't want to do it, but you kind of don't have a choice, right? So it's like, what are you going to do? And, like, I got saved, like, 10 years ago. I mean, I grew up Catholic school, checked all the boxes, did all the sacraments, but, like, I was just sort of checking boxes. Like, I wasn't. Now I'm, like, in constant comms with God. Like, he is sick of me. Like, he's like this girl. Like, oh, my gosh. Like, we know Bridget, you know, it's like downloading, texting all day. He's probably, like, leaving me on red. Like, we got it. Like, it's just a lot, you know, And I'm just like, I, like, feel, feel like I have that relationship, and that's like, what changed for me. And from, like, you know, I went through a phase in my life where I felt like I really hit rock bottom. And I, I just went to God in a really sincere moment and was like, okay, my way doesn't work. I'm finally ready to admit that. Like, I want to try it your way. And it was just like this sweet little moment of surrender. And I was living at home with my mom in Pittsburgh. You know, I had, I had had this life right where I, I grew up with a single mom. I watched her struggle my whole life. My dad left when I was 4, and I was, I watched her struggle with money and things, and I was just like, hell bent on, like, I am not gonna live that way. I am going to move to New York City. Had never been to New York City and make it, and I'm gonna work in fashion, and that's what's gonna happen. And I went with 200, didn't know a soul. Kind of didn't like it when I got there. But I had said so many times I was living there, I had to stay. I couldn't even get a bank account. I remember, like, I was like, why won't you take my money? They're like, you don't have any. Like, you're at risk. You're a liability. Like, we don't want you. And I was like, wow, I can't even get a bank account. Like, and like, I just, just worked and worked and worked and, like, outworked everyone and just kind of got where I wanted to be. And I got really immersed in that world and, and fashion. And I had a wonderful boyfriend at the time. I was living in this wonderful apartment. Really nice. Um, it was his, not mine. He was great. It was just, I wasn't great. Like, I, I, I remember I, like, had this moment of, like, I've gotten everything I set out to get. I'm living in this apartment, I'm wearing this YSL outfit. I'm like a publicity of Sauron. Like, and I feel completely empty and why I got everything I wanted. And it was such a.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

What was it? What was the answer?

[Bridget Ball]

I think that there's just, like, a hole in everyone's heart. And I think if I think God feels it and I Think I had to really, like, lose all of those things. I was broke. I had no job, nothing. No boyfriend, no, like, leads on a job, no apartment. Moved back to Pittsburgh. I was like, okay, God, I've got nothing left. I'm at rock bottom. And he just really met me where I was at, and I just filled it all in with God. Like, I just was, like, reading the Bible, and I just started to believe all of the things God says about me. Like, I was like, well, who does God? What does God think of me? And, like, you know, since my dad left, I think I was always missing that father figure. And I'm like, I have that. I actually have that. Like, I am wonderfully created by God. And I just felt like this heart of stone I had was just really softened and I just became a little bit softer. And I'm not perfect. I screw up all day every day. I mean, hence the texting all day. But, like, you know, we're all sinners, but I. I do think deep down I really try to do better all of the time. And so, like, when this whole thing happened with breast cancer, I was. You know, a lot of people have asked me, like, was your faith tested when you had this. Like, when this happened to you? Like, you just had this wedding and you were hopeful for a baby, and you were already kind of struggling to get the IVF thing going. And I was like, yeah, I. I've just lived. Like, I've tried to do it without God and I've done it with God. And, like, I think the storm's coming either way. I think, like, this is my cross to bear. But, like, you have yours and everyone's going through something, right? So I feel like I. Yeah, I feel like I was just, like, I'm choosing to do it with him because that's just a better way for me.

[Jay Shetty]

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[Bridget Ball]

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[Jay Shetty]

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[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Was there no thought in your head at the time which was like, why me? Like, you know, I've finally got married. Like, things are looking good, like I'm settled. I'm like, I feel like the natural reaction for a lot of people would just be like, God, why now? Why me? And you're going through ivf. You know, it's the amount.

[Jay Shetty]

There's.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

There's lots of other things happening in your life, right? Did that thought ever come up or were you too strong to let it come up?

[Bridget Ball]

No, I mean, definitely came up, I think. Okay. So I also have a fashion company and I had been in flight or flight mode for quite some time because we were doing a buyout. So I had a partner. And a buyout, you know, is not a fun thing. It's a Little taxing. It's a hard situation to go through. And I kept saying to God during that process, like, if it's not meant for me and you don't want me to have this company, please just take the company. Like, I don't want it if you don't want me to have it. And I prayed that so many times that I. Like, I'm pretty sure he wanted me to have it. I had bought the company, and I got diagnosed two weeks later. And then there was a day where I went to my oncologist, and in one sentence, she had said to me, you're going to lose all your hair, you're going to lose your eyebrows, you're going to lose your eyelashes, and you're not going to be able to carry a baby. And in that moment, I felt like, wow, this is not fair. Like, at least the baby part was really hard for me because, yeah, that was hard. And I. And I felt really sad for Mike, too. Not even just for me, because I'm like, that's. That stinks. You know, we're one year into marriage, and, like, he's always wanted to be a dad, and that's, like, super important to him, and he'll be the best dad, and he should get to be a dad, and I feel like he will get to be a dad. But I think in that moment, yeah, you definitely have those, but you're also so scared that you're just like, yeah, that's unfair. But I also am like, am I going to die? So there's like, you're weighing a lot of. Of things, and perspective changes really quick when cancer enters the conversation.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Yeah.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

What. What kind of shifted for you as time went on after the diagnosis, leading up to your, like, first chemotherapy session and getting ready for that and preparing yourself for that. Like, what was going through your mind, you. As you got ready and prepared?

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah. So I had, like, kind of a bit of time. Because my cancer was hormone negative. I was able to do one more round of ivf. So I did the round of ivf, and I was just the whole time thinking about, I'm starting chemotherapy. Like, what's going to happen? This is crazy. Walking into your first chemo, I personally felt physically amazing, super healthy. I went to Pilates the day before. Like, I. There's a lot of things you have to do. Felt a little bit like a ritual or something. You have to get your nails taken off, you have to get your hair extensions taken out. You're kind of like removing all these things. But I Was like, I'm gonna go to pilates and work out. I felt great. And then, you know, you're actively walking in there and you're putting something in your body that's going to make you very sick, potentially very sick. For me, it made me very, very sick. And. And to know, like, in order to survive, I have to do that, and I have to be like, okay, here we go. Like, put it in me, you know? And I think that was strange and a bit weird. But a friend of mine, Jill Martin, taught me very on early on, she said to me, you have to reframe the way you think about chemotherapy. You cannot think of chemotherapy as something that's making you sick. You have to think of chemother, something that's saving your life. And that's been a huge shift throughout the whole thing for me. Everything. I used to complain about having to go get my nails done. Like, what? Like, I used to complain about having to go get my hair to my hair appointment. And, like, I think when you go through something like this, I'm like, I cannot wait to go get my hair done. This is a wig. But. So I kind of got it done, but, like, my own hair. Like, I cannot wait for that. And everything became like, I got to come here today. You know, I don't have to. I get to do things rather than I have to do things. And I think that is like a life shift. I was like, okay, like, I had to go get my nails done. Like, that's a privilege, you know? And like, what a brat.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

I think you're being hard on yourself, too. I think we're all we as in. I think we all get into a space of familiarity and ingratitude and you take things for granted. And I think all of us do that as humans. I don't think it's just you, whatever that may be. Everyone has their version of a hair or nail appointment or something in their

[Bridget Ball]

life that they're like, I don't know about the nail. Because you're like, it's such torture. I can't be on my phone. I'm like, guys, okay. We're okay. You know?

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Yeah, But.

[Jay Shetty]

But.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

But I think it. Hearing you say that really does put into perspective. I was thinking about all the things that I take for granted or all

[Jay Shetty]

the things that I as you said

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

that to me just now, and I think that's going to help a lot of people who are listening. I was just thinking about all the things I say, oh, God, I got to do this. I got to do that. Oh, my God. I have to do this. And it's like, I have the ability to do it healthy and well, and. And that is something that you can't underestimate.

[Bridget Ball]

Right.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

And, you know, hearing about it through your perspective and how that shifted for you, I think that's a huge one.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah, it was. It was a huge thing for me. And I also think, like, I was so hard on myself before. Like, I'm, like, scrolling back through my phone, and you know how it pops up? Like, a year ago or two years ago, I always thought my hair was so thin. And I remember I was always, like, talking about that and, like, trying to fix that, and it's okay to want to fix it and improve. I can't wait for my thin hair to come back. Like, I literally cannot wait. So it's just like, I just think we're all so hard on ourselves. Just know that it's like. I mean, I'm still learning, too, but I'm just like. As I sit here with the big wig on, but, like, you know, like, I got to wear a wig today. I'm kind of pumped. Like, we're, like, really picking on ourselves a lot. I want to somehow be able to teach girls that are, like, give them that perspective. I don't know how, but I've felt that, like, I. We're so hard on ourselves.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

It's almost like you'd wish you could teach humans to do that without going through pain, because the pain is so intense and excruciating and terrible. But it's almost like that's a gift that you've developed by going through that. That.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

I don't know. I don't know if all of us can learn that without sadly going through something so difficult.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah, it's.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

It's a lot. It's hard.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah, it's hard. It's hard, like, because you go from, like. I mean, you get so sick. And that's something else I struggled with a lot. Like, when you're so, so sick, you. You are not even picking up the phone. Like, there's. You can't film it. Like, I wasn't hiding it, but I was so sick. Like, there you are on the bathroom floor. Mike made me a nice little bed on the bathroom floor. He would come and lay in there with me sometimes, but it was just like, you can't sit up. Like, you're bleeding from every thing. You can bleed from your. Every day. It's like, every part of your body. I mean, I didn't know anyone was sitting at their house that sick. Like, I. I pictured I would get sick, but I did not picture. And everybody does handle it differently. I don't know that everyone gets this sick. I. My oncologist did say to me at one point, like, some people tolerate it well, and some people don't. And then there's you, you know? So I think I. I had a bad go at it, but I struggled with showing it a lot because I definitely wanted to show it, show more. But I also didn't want people to pity me, and I didn't want it to seem performative. But then I was like, I also want to honor the people who are going through this. Like, what if someone's watching this and one of their employees has someone going through this, and they just don't know that that person, like, might be really, really trying? And it's. There's a lot to it. They put you in medically induced menopause, and you're like a hormonal teenager girl. And I'm, like, crying to Mike about anything you could ever imagine. You're not even yourself. How can you expect people to understand that? How can I lead a team during all of that and. And not be mad at myself? And you're just. It's so much. And I don't really know how to explain it. I don't know that there's a right way. Like, I tried to share, but I definitely. If I'm being totally honest, I would say I erred on the side of showing less because it's gruesome. It's gruesome. Like, horrific things. It can do your body, and you can't sit up. You can't walk. Like, I. We had a launch for my brand one day, and I crawled to the computer to get it work. To work. Like, I was like, this is just, like, the most humbling thing. I cried once. It was. I remember during football season, Mike was watching a football game, and I was so hungry. But there was just such a price to pay. Like, I had a lot of GI issues, and there was such a price to pay if I ate that I was, like, starving. And I'm not good at starving. At, like, date. And I was just crying, like, watching these commercials. I'm like, just want to eat. But I would. I ordered food once. I'm like, just chew it and, like, spit it out, because I just wanted to eat so badly. But there was a price to pay. It was coming out both ways. Everything you could imagine, everything is inflamed and congested. And it's not just like, you're throwing up, you're, like in major pain. And like, my teeth have completely rotted, like, from all of this. Like, just things you, you don't want to. I didn't want to show that. I wouldn't be mad if someone showed that. I hope someone does, but I didn't want people to pity me, so I didn't know exactly what to do with it there. So I just went day by day and yeah, did, did what I could. I, I, I pushed Mike to, to, to remind me to post. And he was like, sweetheart, just like, don't. But I was like, but the only purpose I feel in this is when people write me and they say, I went in, I got checked, I, I'm not gonna have to do chemo, Bridget. Like, I was like, okay, there's a, there's something in this.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Yeah. That's helping so many people. Even, Even you're talking about it here right now. I'm sure there are so many people who go and self exam and self

[Bridget Ball]

exams, do your exams. Like, please, please, Like, I blank. I'm like, begging people, I'm like, please do it. Because before I went in to see my oncologist, I was like, I need to like, have her do a self exam on me. I need to just figure this out. And like, this was the night before my appointment. She's a very proper, amazing oncologist. I want her to do a breast exam on me and I want to film it. And I'm like, but I'll be like, flagged for my nipples being out on Instagram, right? So I'm like, Amazon prime, what can I get? Right? And I'm like, looking up pasties that you wear to like a rave. I could only found like this red glittery one. She walks in the next day. I'm like, can you teach us all how to do a self exam and can I film it? She's like, what is that? Like, I literally had disco glitter pasties on. And she's like, super serious. But like, it got sent to like 70,000 people. Like, and people were like, I've never known if I was doing this right. And like, she can explain it better than anyone else, right? And now I feel like even watching that, like, I know how to do one. And I think if any, anyone takes anything from us, like, if you're listening to this and you're hearing this, like, just right ahead, right now, just like, let's have a feel. Like, let's tonight do our self exam. And what you're looking for is, like, you have to know your body, know your baseline, and you're looking for a change. So any change, and then you get checked, and you don't let yourself put it off, put it off, put it off because it's scary. That's what people tend to do. But there is no. No instance with this where finding out sooner is a bad thing. You know, it can definitely keep you out of chemotherapy. It can keep you at a lower stage. Like, it's. It's so important. So, yeah, go in, get checked, and, like, just watch my video that I made and. And see me in my disco, you know, rave party outfit.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

What does beauty mean to you today?

[Bridget Ball]

Oh, I'm working on that a little bit. Like, I. I've always enjoyed fashion and makeup and all of this, and I think that's great, and I think that's fine. But I think I. To lead with my heart and really make people feel a certain way that will maybe inspire them to, like, search for if something's missing in their life or a little hole in their heart. And, like, that would be something I found really beautiful, you know? And another thing I thought of, like, I saw a girl who looked sick. She's going through cancer on the Internet the other day. And I'm like, there's nothing not beautiful about her. Like, no one feels like that about her. So I think it's like, just being in it really changed it. Like, no one was looking at me going, she looks so bad. I mean, they might have been scared. She looked. She looks very sick. I'm alarmed. But, like, no one was saying, oh, she's so ugly. You know what I mean? Like, it's different. I think we're just. Again, it goes back to being, like, our own worst critics and so hard on ourselves.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Yeah. Thank you. Well said. What I wanted to ask you two questions. What's the most helpful thing someone can say to someone who's got cancer? And what's the most unhelpful thing people can say to someone who's got cancer?

[Bridget Ball]

That's a good question, because I think

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

a lot of people just don't know what to say.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah, I feel like you just don't ever want to be dismissive of what they're going through. But I think something that's been really nice and really sweet is, like, people who continue to check in on me. And even, like, when I didn't have the time to write people back, I swear, when people would reach out to me, it would be like, in the exact second I needed. Like, it was like, wow, you know, and it would be like, someone I knew from years ago, and they'd be like, oh, I'm just reaching out. And, like, I felt bad because they didn't write back to everyone, but, like, you don't know how much you can. What an impact you can have on someone's day. Like, I have made a conscious effort now. Like, when I think of people now, I make sure I text them that day. I don't care if they write me back or not, too. Like, that's one thing I really learned. Like, just keep reaching out. Just keep going. Like, I just reach out to people whenever they pop into my head now. And I'm praying for you. Love you. Like, you don't know what someone else is going through. And, like, I do feel like we're all connected and, like, it's beautiful. And you can really, I just think keep. Just keep loving on them, you know, Just keep loving on them. And even there's points, points where people are mad and they're, like, upset and they might not want to reply, but they're never going to be mad that you reached out. So I think it's like, do it, but don't expect anything back from it. I felt so carried in love and prayer the whole time, and I felt a little spoiled sometimes. And, like, this is so nice, you know, And I want to be able to hopefully do give some of that back to people. Some. Somehow, some way. If you think of anything, Jay, let me know.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

I think this is giving back.

[Bridget Ball]

Oh, okay.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

I think this is giving back. You showing up online every day, you. You sharing your story. That. That is the best give back for everyone who checked in with you because you're hopefully helping someone they know or someone they love from not going through the same thing or catching it early and not having to experience the hardships of it that you did. I've had a couple of friends in the last 12 to 24 months who've also been going through cancer. And I've found when I talk to them, one of the biggest things they say to me is people don't know what to say. People kind of distance themselves. People think I just need space. But actually, it'd be really nice if they checked in. And it's what you just said, that no one's ever going to be mad if you check in. Even if they don't have the capacity or capability to respond back or call you back or message back. It's always going to mean something. To that person.

[Bridget Ball]

Yes. It meant so much to me. I always think of my mom growing up with a single mom and seeing her struggle. I'm like, you know, whoa. It's not lost on me that I went through this with, like, complete privilege of, like, having help, like, having someone who cared about me to help me. Like, not everyone has that. So I think it's like, if there's anything you can do, like, if someone has kids, so anything you could do to help them do their laundry, any grocery store run or something for them, it's, like, really deeply meaningful. It gets really hard. And I don't think people always feel comfortable showing how hard it is because it's a bit embarrassing. You know, you want to try and you want to be. Or I wanted to be anyway. Like, I'm okay, but it's like, no, you're not.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Yeah. Which is natural. We do it anyway. We do it even when we don't have cancer.

[Bridget Ball]

Right.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

We all act like we don't need help, and we got it all together, and we're okay. And so when you have something that you're worried about and concerned about. You talked about, you know, Mike there. I think what I find so. It's so beautiful watching you both together and what you did share from the journey of just how engaged and present Mike was throughout the whole journey. And I think I always find it fascinating because, of course, on our wedding days, we all make this commitment of in sickness and in health. And we've all heard hundreds of people say it, or maybe, you know, tens of people say it. We've seen it in movies. We've, you know, whatever it may be, you hear this statement again and again, and then people are actually, you know, sick.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

And then you actually go through that. Talk to us about the realities of what it took. I'm. You know, I think Mike also went down to, like, you know, cut days at work to be there to support. But I'm sure it's not easy for you either, because you're going through this very vulnerable thing with your partner that's not easy on your side. Talk to me about the realities of what it feels like to go through cancer, even with someone you love and that loves you deeply.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah. I mean, it. It was hard for me at first, like I said, because I had grown up, like, always being really independent and wanting that for myself. And I think God was like, no, you're going to learn to trust a man, and you're going to have to lean on him. And it is what it Is. And I found that really hard. I mean, I. Straight out of the gate, you know, this is one year into marriage. I'm like, sickness and health. Go, buddy. Let's see what you got, you know? And he really put himself second. And I. I came up with this whole, like, choose your husband. Like, your life depends on it. Because I can't imagine what I would have done without him. Like, you know, he's a plastic surgeon, and he has been training for this moment for 17 years. So you get to this moment, you open your business, you pass your boards, and now it's like, oh, please step away from your business and learn how to do a fashion company. Because she just bought it, has debt, and now owns a full company. You know, so it's a lot to put someone. And I think chaos reveals character, right? And one thing I did before I met Mike was I made this, like, husband list. I used to talk about it on, like, TikTok or Instagram a long time ago, but it. It was. It's not like, oh, abs and a corner office and status and all this stuff. It's much more, like, character driven. Like, does he love his mom? How does he make people feel? What does he leave in the room? Does he have any friends? Does he care about people? Because at the end of the day, life is going to get hard, and those are the things that are going to matter. On our first date, I remember Mike telling me, like, his parents have been married for 40 years. His grandparents are married for 70 years. I was like, oh, he's, like, hitting these things on this list I wrote over here. But it was the list.

[Jay Shetty]

Is he tell us about what was on the list?

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah, it was. It was like, does he love his mom? What do people say about him? Do people like him? Like, I. That was a big one on my list. I was like, I really want everyone to love him and just think he's great. If someone wouldn't like Mike, like, that's kind of odd. Like, he's a really good human. Like, he's just, like, a great person. Like, I want to be like Mike. Like, he has something he was passionate about. Is there something he loves? Do we align on our values and our faith and, like, not letting anything go off the list, like, not seeing potential in people. Oh, can I change this in this person? Like, I'm so attracted to them. My date with Mike, when I walked in, that was the first time I think I walked into a room thinking, like, like, do I like this guy? And it wasn't like, does he like me? I was really good in the sense of, I know who I am in Christ, I know God loves me, I know who I am, and I know what I think I need. And if I just give this to God, I'm believing that he's going to find this guy for me, rather than me trying to make all of these exceptions to these rules and make it work with these other people that it's not working with. And, like, looking back, I'm like, wow, God really sees your whole story beginning to end. Like, he even knew I needed a doctor. When we first started, started dating Mike, it was always easy with him. Everything to the extent that I was like, oh, am I, like, not interested in this? Is this.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Oh, yeah, it was. It was so peaceful that it felt unfamiliar.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah. Like, I was sort of like, maybe he should be my friend. Like, I don't feel this because I wasn't, like, waiting for him to text me and all of this. He was just texting me. He was just pursuing me actively. And I didn't really know what to make of that. There were no games, so I almost got confused by that. And so thank God I had that list, because I'm like, he's not breaking anything on the list. But I was just like. So what I did was I, like, took counsel. I asked married people. I'm like, there's this guy, he's this, like, really hot doctor. Which also, like, I didn't want to go out with him for six months. I did not want to go out with him because I was like, he looks like a model. And, like, I want to be the pretty one. But, like, I got over it. And, like, he wore jeggings. I remember I was just, like, looking for problems. But, like, none of the photos on his Instagram were just of him, which I was like, that's a good thing. That's a good thing. Because, like, even though that wasn't on the list, like, that says a lot about. You care about people. You're with your mom, your brother, you have some friends. Those are great things. Those are. Those are telling things, you know? And so. Yeah. But I did get a little bit worried at some points asking my married friends, being like, like, I don't know, guys. He's, like, always writing me back, and he, like, wants to hang out every day. Like, it's a little weird. And they were like, and he has a job and he likes his mom. He's a good person. What's the problem? You know, it's like, but what do you think that is, like, why are we all doing that?

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

We don't have a history of peaceful, clear contact. And therefore when someone finally does that, you kind of get spooked.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

And you're like, what's going on here? Like, you're not meant to do this. You're meant to make me feel nervous and anxious and all the other emotions that aren't healthy and helpful or in that moment at least.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

And so I think we're all looking for that kind of like racy feeling.

[Bridget Ball]

Like the butterfly.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Yeah.

[Bridget Ball]

I felt like I liked him, but I didn't have this like, sinking pit in my stomach at all times.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

I mean, there's a study that shows

[Jay Shetty]

that what we feel when we say

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

the butterflies is you're feeling excitement and stress at the same time. But when someone messages you back, you only feel excitement and clarity.

[Jay Shetty]

So you don't get the stress, but

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

it's the excitement and stress together that creates that nervousness.

[Jay Shetty]

But when someone actually is just as

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Mike was messaging back and, you know,

[Jay Shetty]

pursuing you and being really clear about

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

it, we're like, oh, wait a minute, I don't feel the stress.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

And the stress is what makes things exciting. But, you know, we know that's not true because, hey, when you're actually marry someone or you are in a long term relationship with someone you don't want, someone that causes you stress, you don't want to come home to a stressful person, you don't want to wake up to a stressful person, you don't want to. That's not what you're looking for.

[Bridget Ball]

You know, imagine the guy not calling me back when I was going through my chemotherapy. You know, I. I made one video and I was like, the guy who is not texting you back is not the guy with you in the middle, the middle of the night in the emergency room. Like, yeah, you know, I had my big faux fur on and my. And he's just sitting there like, what can I do to help? You know, and it's like, what are we doing? What was I doing?

[Jay Shetty]

How, how did you two meet before that first day?

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah, the old fashioned way. We met through friends. At. My one friend, she's an influencer and her husband's a plastic surgeon. They were in the same residency at nyu. And she kept telling me to go out with him. And I would just be complaining about these guys I was dating, and I would just be like, oh, should I text him back? And it was all this plotting and all this stuff, and she's like really think you should text Mike? And I'm like, he looks like a model. Like. And she was like, but just like, take that out of it. What is the problem? And I was like, I don't know. I don't know. I was like, he's not my type. And she's like, you're not married, you don't have a type. Like, you have a lot of people that aren't your type that you've dated.

[Jay Shetty]

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[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Talk to me about that idea of so many. There are so many women who feel if I'm not married by 30, if I don't have kids by 35. You got married when you were 40, and life will continue from this point onward. And it's like you never felt behind or didn't allow yourself to feel behind.

[Bridget Ball]

Well, I did. I felt behind. Yeah, I felt behind. But, like, I was so consumed with work. Like, that was a big thing for me because I think just growing up with a mom who struggled, it was like the number one thing. And until I felt like I got myself to a point where I was, like, financially independent or in a good place, I wasn't as focused on it. But then, yeah, like, I was like, oh, no, I want to have babies weeks. So it was okay that I had to be laying in bed for a year. I've been out for a lot of years. That was kind of when my platform was built by accident, I guess, before cancer happened. It was. A lot of girls would come up to Mike and I in New York City mainly, and they would say, oh my gosh, you guys give me so much hope. I'm 32 and I haven't met anyone. And I met Mike when I was 35. So I think, you know, I. I leaned into that a little bit and thought about it, and I think it was just like. Like believing in God's plan for my life and not trying to do things my way. That being said, I do think I would have saved myself a lot of tears and a lot of years if I had written the husband list before and not got so caught up in, like, the games and the butterflies and like, all of that. Because, yeah, I don't know. That's. That's like a thing.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Yeah. What. What would you say to someone who says to you, I feel behind at 35 because I haven't got married yet?

[Bridget Ball]

Have you written your husband list and what's on it and who are you dating? And, like, what are you scared to let go of? Because I do think that there has to be a moment of kind of like, okay, God, I'm gonna do this your way. I'm not gonna keep doing this my way.

[Jay Shetty]

What I like about your list is

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

it's not a list the way I think people think about a list. So I think when people hear the words husband, husband list, they think like, six feet tall, you know, this job.

[Jay Shetty]

Right?

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Yeah. I think a lot of people write those things and. Or even if it's not a lot of people, I know a lot of people who've said those things to me where it's all about, like, what kind of job they have. So, like, Dr. Would be high up there, right?

[Bridget Ball]

And.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Or, you know, finance or not finance.

[Jay Shetty]

So people. Also, their list is like, I would

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

never marry someone in finance.

[Jay Shetty]

I'd never.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

And I'm like, I don't think that affects whether someone's a good partner or not.

[Jay Shetty]

Like, I always think about, like, your

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

career doesn't really say much about how you are as a partner. Your bank balance doesn't say how much you are as a. What you're like as a partner. Your height doesn't say anything about what you're going to be like as a partner. And I think it's funny when you measure someone as a partner on these things that mean nothing to do with them being a partner.

[Bridget Ball]

Right.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

And so I think even though I never had a formal list, I think when I met Radhi, too, I was looking for how someone lit up a room and how someone was with me in different circumstances, in different scenarios. How was I treated around different people? How did I feel when I shared a new idea or I thought about something new? And then as we got married and moved forward, even then, like, I would say we went through more challenges after we got married because we moved country, we moved jobs, we moved home.

[Jay Shetty]

And when you go through all that

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

together again, I mean, what you've been through is far harder and far greater than all of those things.

[Jay Shetty]

But when you go through difficult things,

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

you figure out what someone's really made of and what their response is. And I remember being four months away from being broke when we were married. And this was around maybe six months into our marriage or maybe just coming up to a year into our marriage. And I told her the situation we were in, and she was like, I trust you. And like, that, to me, was the person I married and the character of the person I married, married, not someone who is, you know, not there for me. At that time.

[Bridget Ball]

Right.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

And so I think, for me, I didn't. I knew Radi was the one when I met her because she was always nice and kind to everyone that we met, whether they could help her or not. She lit up every room she walked into. She was always bubbly and fun and had good energy and ideas. I didn't feel like she played any games. We both didn't play any games with each other.

[Jay Shetty]

I was really sure about who I

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

was when I met her, and that didn't scare her and didn't intimidate her or didn't make her feel any other way. And she was still learning and curious about who she was, and I love that about her.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

So I think, to me, it was more about.

[Bridget Ball]

You had a list, though.

[Jay Shetty]

I did.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

That's what I'm agreeing.

[Jay Shetty]

No, that's what I'm agreeing with you.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

I'm saying it wasn't written.

[Bridget Ball]

Written down.

[Jay Shetty]

Exactly. Exactly.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

But it was there, and I was very. I could sense it when I was around her. And I think you need to be clear about those things.

[Jay Shetty]

But I think the problem now is people get clear about stuff, but not

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

the right stuff stuff.

[Jay Shetty]

You get clear about a bunch of

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

stuff that doesn't make any difference, like, you know, someone's height or someone your ick. That they wear jewelry or.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah.

[Jay Shetty]

The fact that they don't dress well or whatever it is.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Like, that stuff doesn't impact whether someone's going to show up for you when you're broke, when you're lost, when you're confused, when you have cancer. You know, like. Yeah, that's not gonna be the, you know, differentiator. So.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah, and it's a cool one that you said, too, that, like, you were very sure of who yourself, like, who you were when you met her, and that didn't intimidate her. And that's, like, one thing I haven't really thought of and how attractive that must be to someone, But I didn't even really think of it like that. Like. Yeah, that didn't intimidate him. He, like, pushed into that and leaned into that and was like, that's cool. You know, and, like, that is cool.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

It is. It is. And. And.

[Jay Shetty]

And it's, you know, like.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

I mean, you know, the. I think Mike's just set such an incredible example for, you know, all partners, truly, just by observing both of you together of just what it takes and what love really means. You know, I think we talk a lot about what love means and how do you show it and you know what that looks like. And I think both of you together represent in the most beautiful way. And it's. I'm so happy that you've been a big part. Sharing that with us also, I think, has made every partner go, I need to step up, you know, In a good way. In a good way.

[Bridget Ball]

Oh, yeah. I didn't worry about that, too, because I'm like, I don't want people to think we're, like, bragging, but it's like, we're not. We're, like, literally.

[Jay Shetty]

Well, it's hard. So there's no bragging because it's hard work.

[Bridget Ball]

You know, he went to support Aura once, because when all my hair really started shedding, like, badly, and I had lost so much weight, I was, like, £84. And, like, I. Because I was just having a lot of issues with eating, but he was like, I want to do your makeup for you. I want to do something for you. It was so funny because it was bad, you know? And, like, he had not a clue. And thank God he's so much better at surgery than makeup.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Yeah, I've seen him do your nails

[Bridget Ball]

and, like, kind of good at nails. Yeah. Not the makeup so much, but, yeah, he was, like, a little confused.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

And even I saw you dressing up during treatment, too. That was the way you were, I think, finding joy.

[Bridget Ball]

I was pushing myself. Like, it was later in my treatment, like, I started dressing up for chemo because I saw this old older woman there once, and she was just fierce. She had on heels and this outfit, and I was like, I love her. And I was like, is she here for treatment? And they're like, yes. She always dresses up. And they said. And she rings the bell every time when she leaves. I said, had goals. I love her. So then the next week, I was, like, trying to dress up and be just like her because I was like, wow. Like, maybe I can inspire people. Maybe they'll see me dress up, and then they'll want to dress up. It really. I was like, wow when I saw her.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

How did you dig to find the strength at that time? Like, talk to me about that. Like, you just said, like, you know, you're just trying to get up. You're just trying to get to treatment. You're just. You've got to deal with being on the bathroom floor and bleeding from. You know, it's like, how do you in those. How do you in that moment, even find the strength?

[Bridget Ball]

Like, I don't know. Like, I. I do. I think you're stronger than you think Like, I, I am kind of glad. Like, ignorance was bliss. I don't know how I would have gone that first day and let them put chemo in me if I had known what was gonna happen. I really don't. Like, I, it was hard. And then later in my treatment when I was doing radiation, I had to do 15 rounds of radiation and I was like, okay, I really want to dress up every day. Like, I'm not gonna say, I'm gonna do my hair, I'm gonna wear a hat, I'm not gonna do my makeup. But like, I really wanna challenge myself to like build my self confidence back a bit. And I felt like the ways I thought of when I built my confidence up when I was younger, I was like, I bought a, a very expensive Equinox gym membership. And I was like, but I'm gonna buy this. And then I'm gonna say, I'm gonna go and I'm gonna go and I'm gonna keep that promise to myself. And as I keep doing that, that I'll, I'll start to believe in myself. So it's like I am getting dressed for this no matter what, every day. And I did not want to, but every day I just remember being like, but I only have to do it 14 more times. I only have to do it 13 more times. And. And then at the end, it was just like, I did it. I couldn't believe it. I did it. I'm not saying these were the world's best outfits, but like, it was just like, I think there's something to that. Like making a promise with yourself and keeping it big or small, you start to believe in yourself and you start to trust yourself and you start to have confidence that you can do things you, you say you can do. And I, I think that, like, helped me a lot. Like, a lot more. And it seems so small and like, I mean, literally putting on an outfit, but it was huge for me. I remember being like, wow, I did it. I couldn't believe it.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

How did you not get defeated every time? Because, like, you know, I think a lot of people when you're going through something like this, you build yourself up, you prepare yourself, you get ready, and then you still got to do another round, you still got to do this, you still like, how did you not let yourself get defeated?

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah, I mean, I got defeated sometimes and I just, I would just try to go back to like, spinning it to be like, I get a chance to live. I get a chance to, to go on and live. And I can do it. I just, I. Right when I got diagnosed, I didn't show this because I was like, I'm a little cuckoo, you know, but, like, I embroidered healed on everything you could ever imagine. My sweatshirts, my bag, everything. And every morning, thank you, Jesus, for my healing. Thank you, God, for healing me. I was not healed, you know, and I'm wearing a sweatshirt to Memorial Sloan Kettering, a cancer center in New York City. Got healed. I was just writing it everywhere, and I was just believing for it. And, like, I guess I didn't see a point in not believing for it. Like, I, I just, like, I don't see a point in, like, not believing I'll be a mom. Like, I believe. I just believe it. Now I got to go write mom on everything. But I, I, I just believe, like, I don't know if it will be the way I imagined. Like, that was a really hard time for me the day that they said, you won't carry a baby. And I'm still like, well, maybe I'll carry a baby, like, very. I don't know. But I believe I will be a mom in some way, shape or form, whether that's adopting or. We actually have a surrogate now, so

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

I'm so happy to hear that. It's amazing news.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah, we're working on that. And that's, like, a quite a long process and, like, such a beautiful thing, and. And that someone would want to do that and feels really called to, like, make someone else a mother. Like, I think that's so beautiful. And I just know Mike will be the best dad, and he deserves it. So.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

You both do. You both do, for sure.

[Bridget Ball]

Thank you. Yeah.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Talk to me about your talks with God during this time.

[Bridget Ball]

They're really raw. They're not this, like, a little Catholic Bridget who grew up, like, you know, oh, I'm like, what the heck is going on? Like, this is like, it's like, honestly, like, texting with someone that I could say anything to, you know, And I.

[Jay Shetty]

Do you actually text?

[Bridget Ball]

No. It's like, in my mind, I do it all day, and then I try to make time, like, at night, and I, like, download everything. But he already knows, like, in my mind, that's what I believe, that he already knows, like, everything. He knows all of our thoughts. He knows the number of hairs on her head. Like, like, I, I, I just, I am like, tmi. I'm kind of just. I think he's sick of me. I'm like, he's probably heal the girl enough, you know? Don't Want to hear from her anymore?

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

I love your sense of humor. Talk to me about. We're talking at the top about grief. And as I'm talking to you, there's so much joy and gratitude and resilience that you demonstrate, which is just, mind you inspire me so much like, oh, wow. It's just when I'm. Whenever I'm around you, I just feel so moved. Moved. Truly.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

By your faith.

[Bridget Ball]

And you're like, you do. You're not giving yourself any problem.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

No, Bridget, this is about you.

[Jay Shetty]

It's about you.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

It's about you. And, And I mean, it. It's. It's. It really moves me. I, I wanted to ask you, how do you. How have you learned, or how are you learning right now to hold both grief and gratitude at the same time?

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah, I feel like that's a really hard question. And I feel like, like I said, I don't think I know how to do both at the same time. When I was really sick, I wasn't grieving yet because I was so scared. I was scared I was going to die. And I've never had that before. I've never lived a day in my life before where I was like, am I going to live? So you're not balancing much, like, getting through it, you know, day at a time, hour at a time sometimes, and you're just trying to put one foot in front of the other and, like, get through it. I think the grief is coming more now because I feel more safe now. And I feel like, yeah, I feel like now I'm, I feel like I'm gonna live. I hope I'm gonna live in the, you know, I, I.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

You want you here.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah. And I. And so now I'm kind of like, whoa, what just happened? Like, like, it's survivor's guilt, too. It's really hard because, like, not everybody gets what I just got, so it's hard to say. I feel really like, like, I, I, I'm struggling with that. I do think I need to let myself lean into that a little more and definitely needs. I need to do some work and some work on myself about letting myself feel the feelings that just happened, but I'm not doing great at that. Yeah. Right now I'm being very like, like, well, I should just be happy that I'm alive, you know? So some work to do there. Do you have any advice for me? How do I do that? You tell me. I'm like, I don't know.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

No, I, I think your talks with God and, And the Incredible sharing you do with your community. I'm. I'm in no place to guide or advise you. I feel so. Just touched by the way you talk to God about what you're going through. And I. I mean, there could be no better guide than that. And. And then also hearing about just. Just how you chose to share it with the community. And. And. And I feel like you're. You.

[Jay Shetty]

You.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

You've already processed so many emotions, more than you can even ever imagine, and you're going to know how to process these new ones as they come up because you've already done so many of the harder ones.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

And so it's just trusting yourself and trusting God that you'll get the wisdom and the insight to know what to do next.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Which you've already lived by.

[Bridget Ball]

So I feel. I definitely feel a little bit like.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Like.

[Bridget Ball]

Like, oh, now what do I do? Because, like, you know, I, like, had this whole life, and then it kind of got turned upside down. So I'm like, okay, it is what it is. But now it's like, what do I do? Do I go back to talking about clothes or, you know, and it's like, I'm definitely grieving who I was. I don't, like, think she's coming back. I don't think that. I think there will always be that. And then, like, before and after cancer. I don't know that a. It's not a blessing, though, because, like, I get to live my life through a different lens. I hope that other people get to see that through me. Like, I hope that they get to, you know, what's the saying? Like, healthy people want a lot of things, but sick people, they only want one thing. And it's like, I hope that people just. It can be a small reminder to them to, like, if you're, like, listening to this today and you're having a bad day, but you have your health, like, the world is your oyster. You are so blessed and so lucky, and there's so many things, Circumstances that we can change and work on and to just maybe if you could just shift that to gratitude a little bit. For what? There's always something to be grateful for. You know, like, I was really grateful that I got to do cold capping during my treatment, and it sucks. Like, but I was so lucky and blessed to be able to do that. Not everyone gets to do that. And I kept some of my hair, and I'm like, wow, God, you are just, like, spoiling me, Ron. Like, I am even keeping some of my hair, like, I don't know. I. I hope it. I hope I figure out how to. What to do next and how to merge. And I. I don't feel the exact same pressure I felt before. It's like, post every day and all this because I'm kind of just like, I. I need a beat. Like, I need to figure out, but I don't know. I don't know.

[Jay Shetty]

What do I do?

[Bridget Ball]

Send tips. Tell me. I don't know. Like, I feel like most people who've been through this, like, that I've met are, like, really badass. So I'm, like, looking forward to that. I think they're, like, super, like, mega. Like, like, I'm like, whoa, you're a really impressive person. And I'm like, so something happens, you know, I'm just like, not at that far yet. I'm, like, still working on it.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

I think a lot of people think they have to find their purpose. And you're already living it by doing what you're doing right now. So, you know, I think you're already living the next phase of your life without even knowing it.

[Bridget Ball]

I mean, I think purpose is. Is so cool in that way.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

What is the best advice you've ever heard or received?

[Bridget Ball]

This too shall pass. Can I. Can I explain more than a sentence?

[Jay Shetty]

I knew you were going to do that.

[Bridget Ball]

No, I am sorry. I get on myself. So I think, because obvious, for obvious reasons, like, you know, going through the year I just went through. This too shall pass. But it's also like, another reminder to be in the moment and realize, like, but what's good is what good is happening right now, because this is gonna pass. And then also, I think it's so, so important for, like, when you're at your highest moment too, like, you're at the best moment, everything's working out for you. Like, this too shall pass. So, like, be present in that moment, but also stay humble in that moment, because this too shall pass.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Yeah. Well said. I have a little box for you here.

[Bridget Ball]

What is it?

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Inside this box, okay, are different things

[Jay Shetty]

that I think are valuable to people

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

at different points in their life.

[Bridget Ball]

Life.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

And I want you to just pick out anything that looks interesting to you and talk about when it was important. Oh, and how it's changed.

[Bridget Ball]

Oh, my gosh. This is really cute. I don't know. Okay, so nails. I, like, literally can't wait to go and get my nails done. You can't get your nails done when you're going through chemotherapy. I did once. Anyway. Rebel with a cause and I. It got really. It wasn't good. So. Wow. Like, I like this, like kind of excites me. It makes me excited.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

I love that.

[Bridget Ball]

Yeah. Is this like Mike?

[Jay Shetty]

Well, I didn't.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

We need the dark hair.

[Bridget Ball]

So this was actually. That looks like the guy I dated before Mike, who wasn't very nice to me. Who wasn't. Would not have been good at taking good care of me this year.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

So like we're leaving him behind. Yeah.

[Bridget Ball]

See, like. But okay, what else? This is like really hopeful to me. This is like this is happening somehow some way this is going to happen. So prayers up for this one. But I'm believing. Like, I just. I just believe, you know, I. I just. What's a. Yeah. I don't know.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Yeah. Delete.

[Bridget Ball]

This is really cute. Cuz. It will be three years. This has three diamonds and it'll be our three years this year. So we had our first year and then I got diagnosed at our second year. So our whole second year of marriage. So I feel like the third year is like pretty exciting and cool to go into and like, what's the best thing that can happen, right?

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

I love it. You did great.

[Bridget Ball]

Cool.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

You did great.

[Jay Shetty]

That was it. It was just the ones that stood out to you.

[Bridget Ball]

Oh, look.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

It was the ones that stood out to you.

[Bridget Ball]

You did great. That's cool. I like that. That.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Well, Bridget, I think you're going to go on to help a lot of people, save a lot of people. This has become part of your purpose and the way you're acting and sharing already. And I, I think you're going to continue to inspire people through anything you choose to do.

[Bridget Ball]

Oh, wow.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

I truly believe that. I really believe that through sharing this message, through sharing your journey and story. But even beyond that, I think anything you choose to go and do moving forward will inspire people because of how you go about it, how you carry yourself, how wonderful and thoughtful you are with everyone, how present you are, are. I think there's so many incredible qualities you have that I can't wait for the world to experience and for people to share with. So, yeah, thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for trusting me coming on the show to share your story. When I met you, I was blown away and I couldn't think of a better guest to have on the show and the fact that you came out when you're still, you know, got a treatment left and I know this isn't easy for you physically, mentally, emotionally, but you're still here and, and you make

[Bridget Ball]

it easy you're pretty good. You're good at this shit.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

No, but you make it easy.

[Bridget Ball]

I feel like. Yeah.

[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

You're just so raw and vulnerable. And that's what makes it. That's why people love you. It's why people love learning and following the journey with you. Because can tell it's all real. So, you know, it's incredible. Thank you.

[Jay Shetty]

If you love this episode, you'll enjoy my conversation with Meghan Trainor on breaking generational trauma and how to be confident. Confident from the inside out.

[Bridget Ball]

My therapist told me, stand in the mirror naked for five minutes, put a timer on, and just look at yourself. Day one, I was literally shaking because I was like. Like it was already tough for me to love my body.

[Jay Shetty]

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[Radhi Devlukia-Shetty]

Shop [e-mail] this is an iHeart podcast.

[Bridget Ball]

Guaranteed human.