Super Soul Special: Carole Bayer Sager – Music as Prayer

Podcast: Oprah's Super Soul
Host: Oprah Winfrey
Guest: Carole Bayer Sager
Date: January 7, 2026

Episode Overview

This episode features award-winning songwriter Carole Bayer Sager in a spiritual and revelatory conversation with Oprah. Sager, famed for penning hits like “Nobody Does It Better,” “That’s What Friends Are For,” and “The Prayer,” discusses her new memoir, They’re Playing Our Song. Through soulful reflection, she reveals how music and creativity have been vehicles for healing, universal connection, and self-acceptance. The episode explores the intersection of creativity and spirituality, the lifelong effects of childhood wounds, and the ultimate journey toward inner peace.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Source of Songwriting: Channeling Something Greater

• Creativity as Conduit: Sager expresses the belief that powerful songs don’t come from her, but through her, as though channeled from a higher source.
  • “I've always believed in my heart that the best songs, the ones that resonate in my soul and therefore go out into the world and resonate in other people's, don't come from us. They come through us.” – Carole Bayer Sager (02:23)
• Songwriting as Intention & Prayer: She begins each session with a prayer to bring forth something healing and meaningful.
  • “I always say a little prayer before I go into my music room, and it's a sort of prayer of intention…let me bring forth something…that will help heal.” – Carole Bayer Sager (02:38)
• Oprah’s Reflection: Oprah frames the conversation around how music, like literature, shapes the soundtrack—and the emotional landscape—of our lives (01:44–03:30).

2. The Magic and Universality of Music

• Instant Resonance: Sager describes the mystical quality of pairing melody with lyric, and how universal music can be.
  • “It's not the melody. It's not the lyric. It's the combination where one and one become three.” – Carole Bayer Sager (03:54)
  • “Music is so universal.” – Carole Bayer Sager (04:15)
• How Songs Take Hold: Both discuss how certain songs become lifelong mantras or memories, persisting in listeners’ minds (04:43–05:11).

3. Songwriting as Identity and Healing

• Calling from Childhood: Sager recounts knowing in high school that songwriting was her passion and destiny—not just a job, but her life's purpose.
  • “I knew this is what I wanted to do and this is what I had to do.” – Carole Bayer Sager (05:25)
• Creativity as Spiritual Practice: Songwriting is positioned as Sager’s spiritual practice, a direct path to her highest self.
  • “Creativity is my spiritual practice, which has taken the form of songwriting for most of my life.” – Carole Bayer Sager (06:50)

4. Childhood Wounds & Their Long Shadow

• Internalized Criticism: Sager shares personal stories about body image and her mother’s harsh comments—particularly the painful story of being told to “walk behind me, fatty,” shaping a lifetime of insecurity and difficulty with food (08:57–12:05).
  • “[My mother] said, ‘Walk behind me, fatty. You're embarrassing me.’” – Carole Bayer Sager (09:12)
  • “That voice becomes in your head, and you don't need anyone to tell you that. You're saying it to yourself over and over and over.” – Carole Bayer Sager (11:05)
• The Lifelong Struggle: Despite success, Sager admits she never fully resolved her complicated relationship with food and self-image but continued working on self-acceptance and peace through spirituality and therapy (12:08–12:58).

5. The Anatomy of a Song: Creation of “That’s What Friends Are For”

• Lyric and Melody as Prayer: Sager recounts writing the iconic hit with Burt Bacharach. The creative process was organic—a direct, almost psychic response to melody.
  • “I never thought I'd feel this way. And he said, ‘That's not what I played.’ ... But what's the difference? It's just a 16th note.” – Carole Bayer Sager (15:39–16:55)
  • “That's when something Greater than you is inspiring you to make something more than you thought you were making.” – Carole Bayer Sager (17:12)
• The Song’s Legacy: Beyond personal achievement, the song lifted spirits globally and raised over $3 million for AIDS research (14:23).

6. “The Prayer” – The Spiritual Summit

• Origin for an Animated Movie: Sager and David Foster created “The Prayer” initially for a film, with the lyric embodying a mother’s hopes for her child (20:46).
• Effortless Inspiration: The song came quickly and felt sacred.
  • “Yes, it did. And it came…I knew…It was, I knew, sacred.” – Carole Bayer Sager (23:28)
  • “[David Foster] said the prayer is one of only three songs in the world that's played at both weddings and funerals. The other two songs are Ave Maria and Wind Beneath My Wings.” – Carole Bayer Sager (23:49)
• The Song as Offering: Sager defines “The Prayer” as her spiritual offering, a conduit for safety and healing to others.
  • “Thank you, God, for allowing this song to come through me. Because it's everything—I think it's my theme of my life.” – Carole Bayer Sager (24:03)

7. Pain Amidst Success: Anxiety, Self-Doubt & Healing

• Crippling Anxiety in Success: Sager opens up about how, despite winning awards and acclaim, she struggled with paralyzing self-doubt and anxiety.
  • “I was partly praying we didn't win because I didn't feel that I could make it from my seat to the stage and be coherent or even get there.” – Carole Bayer Sager, on her first Oscar nomination (27:29)
  • “I feel somewhere back in time, I made a deal with the devil. ‘Give me a fantastic life and I promise you I won't enjoy it.’” – Carole Bayer Sager (28:25)
• Transformation through Love and Therapy: Meeting her husband, Bob, and years of therapy led her toward self-love and inner peace for the first time in her life (29:30–31:35).

8. Purpose, Legacy & Inner Fulfillment

• From Darkness to Light: Sager sees her life’s purpose as transforming darkness from her early life into light—spreading connection and making people feel less alone through her songs.
  • “I think my purpose here on earth has been to connect to other people and have them feel less alone.” – Carole Bayer Sager (33:10)
  • “If I could put that out there so others could feel it, then I feel I did what I was supposed to do.” – Carole Bayer Sager (33:52)
• Finding Joy in the Present: The journey to wholeness is a process; she emphasizes that you “get there when you get there.”
  • “And my answer was, you don't. You don't. It's...you get there when you get there, you go through everything you go through.” – Carole Bayer Sager (34:20)

Notable Quotes

• “I've always believed…the best songs…don't come from us. They come through us.”
  — Carole Bayer Sager (02:23)

• “Creativity is my spiritual practice.”
  — Carole Bayer Sager (06:50)

• “That's when something Greater than you is inspiring you to make something more than you thought you were making.”
  — Carole Bayer Sager (17:12)

• “The prayer is the song I'm proudest of writing of any song in my life…It was, I knew, sacred.”
  — Carole Bayer Sager (23:28)

• “Thank you, God, for allowing this song to come through me. Because it's everything—I think it's my theme of my life.”
  — Carole Bayer Sager (24:03)

• “I feel somewhere back in time, I made a deal with the devil: give me a fantastic life and I promise you I won't enjoy it.”
  — Carole Bayer Sager (28:25)

• “I think my purpose here on earth has been to connect to other people and have them feel less alone.”
  — Carole Bayer Sager (33:10)

• “You get there when you get there...It took me that long to get to that place where I can say I love my life.”
  — Carole Bayer Sager (34:20)

Important Timestamps

| Timestamp | Segment / Topic | |---------------|--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 01:44 | Oprah’s introduction: Carole’s influence on the soundtracks of our lives | | 02:23 | Carole on songwriting as channeling, not creation | | 03:54 | The mysterious magic of lyric and melody, “one and one become three” | | 08:57 | Story about her mother’s damaging criticism | | 14:23 | The story and impact of “That’s What Friends Are For” | | 15:39 | Creative process: songwriting as alignment with something greater | | 20:46 | How “The Prayer” was written, inspiration and reception | | 23:28 | “The Prayer” as sacred, played at both weddings and funerals | | 24:03 | “Thank you, God, for allowing this song to come through me…” | | 27:29 | Anxiety and self-doubt even at the peak of professional success | | 29:30 | Healing journey: therapy, inner peace, and love | | 33:10 | Carole’s legacy: making people feel less alone | | 34:20 | Oprah’s question about finding peace sooner; Carole on the inevitability of the journey |

Memorable Moments

• Vulnerability around food and body image: The heartbreaking “walk behind me, fatty” story (09:12) and her lifelong search for peace.
• The detailed creative struggle and spark behind “That’s What Friends Are For” — right down to the “16th note” and the meaning in each lyric (16:55–18:52).
• Openness about missing enjoyment in moments of triumph because of inner turmoil, especially at the Oscars and Songwriters Hall of Fame (27:11–28:25).
• The almost mystical, effortless creation of “The Prayer” (23:28), which Sager considers her life’s offering and spiritual purpose.

The Takeaway

Carole Bayer Sager’s story—artistic, spiritual, and deeply human—is one of channeling life’s wounds into healing for others through creativity. By framing songwriting as both prayer and spiritual practice, she illuminates how music can connect souls, offer solace, and leave a lasting legacy of safety, love, and belonging. Even icons must wrestle with self-doubt, but with time, intention, and connection, peace and self-acceptance are possible. Sager’s journey is a testament to the long, winding road toward wholeness—and the beauty of giving what we most needed to others.