
Julien Saunders reflects on how perceptions of wealth are often illusions shaped by appearances, social comparison, and hidden financial struggles
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Julian Saunders
This is Optimal Finance Daily. The Road From Rats to Riches By Julian Saunders of richandregular.com when most people I know of think of being rich, they imagine things they've seen on television or the movies. But is that what rich really looks like? There are countless examples highlighting what we see and believe is nothing more than a smokescreen from the ESPN 3030 documentary Broke, which exposed the shocking, not shocking stats on how quickly many professional athletes lose it all to the revealing tweet Storm Kanye west shared it's not uncommon to realize what's really happening once you look closely and dig below the surface. This illusion appears with us regular folk too. It's not uncommon to assume that your boss and your boss's boss are raking in the dough because you've seen the car they dr, pictures of their home, or a job description that shows their salary range. In reality. For many of these people, accompanying their
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big paychecks are really, really big bills
Julian Saunders
and enormously expensive lifestyles. Once you boil it down to the details that really matter, you often find they're living paycheck to paycheck and are absolutely miserable because of it. Knowing this, most people are still thinking that I'd take that situation over my own. But I can assure you, comparing yourself to others is dangerous. More often than not, you're comparing yourself to a pipe dream and ignoring that others are glamorizing you the way you're drooling over others. As a teenager, my mother moved us to Atlanta from Brooklyn, New York because she thought it would give us both a better life. In Brooklyn, we lived in a small one bedroom apartment and and I slept on a twin bed in the living room. Moving to Atlanta gave me something I'd only ever dreamed of my own room. At first I didn't know what to do with all the space, the carpet and the air conditioning. Similarly, my mother wanted nothing more than a house to call her own. Like many people, she felt owning a home was a symbol of success and stability. Little did I know that my mother miscalculated how difficult it would be to make the transition. She struggled to find comparable work, and for a period of time we were using food stamps to get by. One day after school, I learned that my jacket was stolen from my locker. I dreaded telling my mother, but I knew I couldn't hide it. While on the bus ride home, I remember telling my friend JD that my jacket had been stolen and we both brushed it off as if to suggest it happens, a common reaction for anyone that has lived in an urban environment. To my surprise, when I got home, my mother wasn't upset, and that very night we went to Burlington Coat Factory to replace my jacket so that I wouldn't be cold waiting for the bus in the morning. The next day when I saw JD he noticed I had a new jacket and said, d you must be rich. At that moment, I remembered where I'd come from, the people I'd lived around, and how fortunate I was. I was able to put into perspective that while there were benefits to being where I was at at this point, there was still struggle hidden in plain sight around me. Could he have been joking? Sure. But it's just as likely that a new jacket in under 24 hours was something he would not have expected if he were in my situation. Looking back, While I didn't have the perspective to fully wrap my head around the situation, it was an early lesson in poverty, income inequality, and the impact it can have on your life as you get older. It was also one of several pivotal lessons that being rich was relative and that comparing what you have to others can lead to some destructive behaviors later in life. I had my fair share of moments as I was surrounded by other predominantly White students who seemingly had it all. Knowing what I know now, I'm confident that many of them faced their own form of struggle and hardship. The upward climb to improve your socioeconomic status is filled with moments like this, some more jarring than others. But it's these moments that set the tone for what you expect out of life going forward and can also catapult you into making some regretful financial decisions. In the spirit of I just want my kids to have what I didn't have when I was younger. The Bottom Line there's nothing wrong with aspiring for more and setting others as a benchmark, but make sure your benchmark is real. As Lily Tomlin once said, the trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat. You just listened to the post titled the Road From Rats to Riches by Julian Saunders of richandregular.com when you're ready to start a business, there's so much
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Julian Saunders
One time only offer this post made me think about the concept of stealth wealth as depicted in the book the Millionaire Next Door. That book helped me realize that most millionaires are not living in the lap of luxury like we imagine. They live below their means and they don't flaunt their wealth with material possessions. I think there's a distinct difference between being rich versus being wealthy, though. Most people use those words interchangeably. When I imagine a rich person, I think of someone with a high income that spends their money on stuff. When I imagine a wealthy person, I think of someone who uses whatever income they have to buy assets, not stuff. Assets are things like stocks, bonds, real estate and businesses. Anything that can allow your money to make more money. Wealthy people recognize that money can be put to work, and that's going to provide more security and peace of mind in the long run. The more time I spend around people who have reached financial independence and have the kind of wealth where they do whatever they want, the more I realize how immune they are to this kind of posturing with fancy looking stuff. Wealth doesn't look like luxury on the outside. A lot of the time it looks like money in the bank. And most millionaires in the US Aren't flashy about it. You'd never really know by looking at them. Just look at Warren Buffett. The man is worth something like $84 billion, and yet he still lives in the same house he bought for 30, 31,000 in 1958. Talk about living below your means. And that'll do it for today and another installment of Optimal Finance Daily. Have a happy Thursday. Thank you for being here every day and listening, and I'll see you on the Friday show tomorrow, where your optimal life awaits.
Podcast: Optimal Finance Daily
Host: Diania Merriam
Guest Author: Julien Saunders of Rich & Regular
Episode #3495 | March 19, 2026
In this episode, host Diania Merriam narrates an insightful blog post from Julien Saunders at Rich & Regular titled “The Road From Rats to Riches.” The episode examines society’s perceptions of wealth and success versus the reality behind them, drawing on Julien’s personal experiences and reflections. Key themes include the relativity of richness, income inequality, the pitfalls of comparison, stealth wealth, and the true markers of financial independence. Diania’s commentary further distinguishes between being "rich" and being "wealthy," tying the narrative to practical lessons and inspiration for listeners seeking financial freedom.
[00:59-02:08]
Julien opens by discussing the illusion of wealth as seen in media and the dangers of conflating “looking rich” with genuine financial stability.
Notable references include ESPN’s “30 for 30: Broke” documentary and Kanye West’s revealing financial struggles, highlighting that visible affluence is often a smokescreen for deeper financial issues.
“For many... a big paycheck comes with really, really big bills and enormously expensive lifestyles. Once you boil it down... you often find they’re living paycheck to paycheck and are absolutely miserable because of it.”
– Julien Saunders [02:08]
[02:08-03:30]
Comparing your financial reality to others can be destructive. People often envy those they believe are better off, not seeing the hidden struggles.
Social and peer-based benchmarks are often influenced by surface-level signals rather than financial fact.
“More often than not, you're comparing yourself to a pipe dream and ignoring that others are glamorizing you the way you're drooling over others.”
– Julien Saunders [02:08]
[03:30-05:10]
Julien shares a formative story about moving with his mother from Brooklyn to Atlanta. Despite improved circumstances and his own room, they still faced hardships, including job loss and dependence on food stamps.
A specific childhood incident with a stolen jacket and its replacement underscores the relativity of wealth and perception among peers.
“When I got home, my mother wasn’t upset, and that very night we went to Burlington Coat Factory to replace my jacket so that I wouldn’t be cold... The next day... [a friend] noticed I had a new jacket and said, ‘D, you must be rich.’”
– Julien Saunders [04:14]
This experience led Julien to reflect on how "being rich was relative and that comparing what you have to others can lead to some destructive behaviors.”
[05:10-06:03]
Even as he moved up in socioeconomic status, Julien noticed ongoing struggles—both his own and those of seemingly privileged peers.
The drive to improve one’s circumstances can lead to wise financial decisions—or, in the wrong context, regretful ones, driven by comparison and unrealistic benchmarks.
“The upward climb to improve your socioeconomic status is filled with moments like this, some more jarring than others. But it’s these moments that set the tone for what you expect out of life going forward...”
– Julien Saunders [05:47]
[06:03-06:40]
Julien cautions against using superficial benchmarks for success, emphasizing the importance of setting real, substantive goals.
“There's nothing wrong with aspiring for more and setting others as a benchmark, but make sure your benchmark is real. As Lily Tomlin once said, ‘The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.’”
– Julien Saunders [06:28]
[07:35-08:35]
Diania connects Julien’s story to the concept of "stealth wealth," referencing The Millionaire Next Door.
She distinguishes between being “rich” (high income, high spending, outward displays) and “wealthy” (using income to buy assets and secure lasting financial stability).
“I think there’s a distinct difference between being rich versus being wealthy, though most people use those words interchangeably. When I imagine a rich person, I think of someone with a high income that spends their money on stuff. When I imagine a wealthy person, I think of someone who uses whatever income they have to buy assets, not stuff.”
– Diania Merriam [07:47]
Cites examples like Warren Buffett, emphasizing living below your means and the hidden nature of real wealth.
“A lot of the time [wealth] looks like money in the bank. Most millionaires in the US aren’t flashy about it. You’d never really know by looking at them. Just look at Warren Buffett... Talk about living below your means.”
– Diania Merriam [08:20]
"Comparing yourself to others is dangerous. More often than not, you're comparing yourself to a pipe dream and ignoring that others are glamorizing you the way you're drooling over others."
– Julien Saunders [02:08]
"While I didn't have the perspective to fully wrap my head around the situation, it was an early lesson in poverty, income inequality, and the impact it can have on your life as you get older."
– Julien Saunders [04:58]
"The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat."
– Lily Tomlin, quoted by Julien Saunders [06:33]
"There’s a distinct difference between being rich versus being wealthy... Wealthy people recognize that money can be put to work, and that’s going to provide more security and peace of mind in the long run."
– Diania Merriam [07:47/08:03]
Julien Saunders’ tone is reflective, honest, and cautionary, using personal anecdotes to underscore the complexity of wealth and the pitfalls of comparison. Diania Merriam maintains her trademark warmth and enthusiasm, adding practical differentiation between “rich” and “wealthy” that resonates with listeners pursuing financial independence.
Main takeaway:
Richness is relative, and apparent affluence is often a façade. Pursue real wealth by living below your means, focusing on building assets over celebrating income, and setting authentic, personal benchmarks for financial success.