3520: We Should Have Rented Instead of Buying by Amanda Kruse of Women Who Money on Housing Tradeoffs

Summary

Optimal Finance Daily, Episode 3520

Title: We Should Have Rented Instead of Buying by Amanda Kruse of Women Who Money on Housing Tradeoffs
Host: Diania Merriam
Date: April 10, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode, narrated by Diania Merriam, features Amanda Kruse’s personal finance blog post, “We Should Have Rented Instead of Buying,” from Women Who Money. Through Amanda’s real-life story, the episode examines why prevailing cultural wisdom about homeownership can lead to costly mistakes, especially when people buy before they are financially or logistically prepared. The discussion breaks down the hidden costs and tradeoffs between renting and buying, culminating in actionable insights for listeners grappling with housing decisions on their own path to financial independence.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

The "Renting is a Waste" Myth

• Main Idea: Amanda and her husband Alan, like many, believed that renting was simply "throwing money away," a notion widely reinforced by family, friends, and society (01:08).
• Reality Check: While buying makes sense in certain situations—such as low mortgage payments, plans to stay for several years, or plans to quickly pay off the mortgage—it often isn't the automatic win it’s assumed to be.

"We bought into the adage that renting is a waste of money... buying a home felt like an urgent financial matter." — Amanda Kruse (01:13)

Personal Story: Costly Impatience and Hidden Expenses

• Buying Two Homes in One Year: Fresh out of college and newly married, Amanda and Alan purchased their first home with minimal savings and a 7.1% adjustable-rate mortgage with PMI. Before they could settle, Alan’s new job forced a move within three months, leading them to buy a second, less suitable home in a rush (02:54–03:58).
• Mounting Hidden Costs: Each house purchase incurred unanticipated expenses—realtor fees, property taxes, insurance, repairs, and maintenance—well beyond the principal and interest, stretching their finances and creating stress.

"We thought it made financial sense, but also we were impatient to be homeowners. We didn't fully understand the costs besides the mortgage payment, and they added up." — Amanda Kruse (03:06)

Five Reasons Renting Would Have Been Better

Amanda highlights the benefits they missed by not renting longer:

1. Better Cash Flow
   • Mortgage, taxes, insurance, and PMI exceeded typical rent, straining the budget (04:40).
2. Opportunity to Save
   • Money spent on down payments and ownership costs could have been used to build an emergency fund and save for a better-fitting house later.
3. Reduced Risk
   • Limited savings and high-risk financing left them financially vulnerable to emergencies or sudden moves.
4. More Flexibility
   • They lived in house #1 for only 3 months and house #2 for 16, showing how quickly life circumstances can change. Renting would have simplified moving and financial adjustments.
5. Lower Stress
   • The anxiety and hassle of buying, selling, and potentially not being able to move or cover expenses took a mental toll.

"To say that buying and selling a home is stressful is an understatement... it was nerve wracking." — Amanda Kruse (06:11)

Reflection and Recovery

• Long-term Impact: Despite these early missteps, Amanda and Alan eventually recovered, settling into a third home and building stability for their family.
• Wider Takeaway: Amanda emphasizes that homeownership is not always the right move, and rushing into it can cause financial harm.

"We became homeowners too soon and it cost us in many ways. We're fortunate to have gotten through that relatively unscathed." — Amanda Kruse (06:33)

Host Commentary: Diania Merriam’s Perspective

• Location Matters: In her area, real estate prices are high—she wouldn’t buy now but is relieved to have purchased in 2018.
• Renting vs. Owning—The Real Math: Over long periods, the costs of renting and owning tend to average out. With owning, taxes and repairs can increase, but you may lock in a good interest rate and have more freedom. With renting, costs are predictable but landlords can raise rents or skimp on maintenance (08:54–09:33).
• Ownership Is a Lifestyle, Not an Investment: Diania believes the popular idea of homeownership as a necessary investment is often misguided and encourages making this decision only after tackling high-interest debt, saving sufficient cash reserves, and starting retirement investments.

"Buying a primary residence is a lifestyle choice, not an investment. Most people make the choice to buy before they're financially ready, and so the costs become unmanageable." — Diania Merriam (09:38)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Cultural Pressure:
  "We bought into the adage that renting is a waste of money... buying a home felt like an urgent financial matter." — Amanda Kruse (01:13)
• On Unrecognized Costs:
  "We didn't fully understand the costs besides the mortgage payment, and they added up." — Amanda Kruse (03:06)
• On Flexibility and Risk:
  "Renting would have allowed us to be flexible with our finances and location, so we could have had more savings and moving would have been much more manageable." — Amanda Kruse (05:40)
• Host’s Closing Thought:
  "Buying a house is the last thing you should do. First, get out of high interest debt, save your cash reserves, get a good head start on retirement investments, and then buy a house if it's really that important to you." — Diania Merriam (09:38)

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Timestamps for Core Segments

• 00:52 – Introduction to Amanda Kruse’s story
• 01:08 – The “rent is a waste” mindset
• 02:54 – Buying two homes too quickly
• 04:38 – Five reasons renting would have been better
• 06:33 – Lessons learned and closing thoughts from Amanda
• 08:54 – Diania’s commentary: Renting vs. buying in today’s market
• 09:38 – Final advice on the homeownership decision

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Summary

This episode dispels the myth that renting is always inferior to buying, using a relatable and cautionary tale from Amanda Kruse. It walks listeners through the real—often hidden—costs and logistical risks of jumping into homeownership too soon, emphasizing that both options come with tradeoffs that must be considered in light of one’s financial and personal situations. Diania Merriam closes with thoughtful commentary: owning a home is not an investment vehicle, but a lifestyle choice suitable only when other financial priorities are satisfied. For anyone weighing their next move in the housing market, this episode offers both empathy and practical advice.

Transcript

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[Amanda Cruz]

This is optimal Finance Daily we should have Rented instead of Buying By Amanda Cruz of womenwho money.com no one likes to waste money When Alan and I were newly married, we thought renting was a waste of our money, and we didn't have that much money. So of course we wanted to stop throwing it away. But our misguided beliefs on renting versus Buying led us to buy a house before we were ready and before we could truly afford it. We dove into home ownership far too soon in two instances. In the end, we spent thousands more than if we'd rented longer. This article shares our story and why we should have continued to rent instead of buying a house. The idea that Rent is a Waste of Money we bought into the adage that renting is a waste of money. I can't say precisely where it came from, family, friends, or society. But no matter, it was there. And to us, buying a home felt like an urgent financial matter. There's some rationale there. In certain circumstances, buying can make more sense than renting. Becoming a homeowner might make sense if the mortgage payment costs much less than rent. You know you'll live there for several years or you plan to pay off the mortgage. Yet some folks buy a home because they consider it an investment. That was us. While it's true that real estate can appreciate, it usually doesn't rise much more than inflation. And in most cases it shouldn't be a primary reason for buying over renting. But we were young and didn't think it through. We wanted to own a home, so we rationalized it by considering it an investment. Plus, it felt less wasteful than rent since the principal payment helped pay off the house. This thinking led us to purchasing two homes within a year to avoid rent but in the end, it cost us much more than renting. Why? Most of all, we didn't understand the hidden costs of buying and owning real estate. Also, we had to move within three months of buying house number one and rushed to buy house number two in the new location. In hindsight, neither home made financial nor logistical sense. Two homes in one year. We were fresh out of college and newly married when we bought house number one. We thought it made financial sense, but also we were impatient to be homeowners. We didn't fully understand the costs besides the mortgage payment, and they added up. For example, there were realtor fees, property taxes, insurance, repairs, maintenance and more. But we weren't at all prepared for those hidden expenses. House 1. We had little savings, so we had a small down payment on top of that. The loan was a 7.1 adjustable rate mortgage with private mortgage insurance or PMI. Ouch. After three months, Alan got a new job in a new city and we put the house up for sale. Thankfully, we sold the house in a couple of months and the company paid our moving expenses, including realtor fees. Otherwise we wouldn't have been able to afford the move. House number two. We were unfamiliar with the new city and couldn't find anything comparable to house number one. But we felt rushed to find a new home fast and we still wanted to avoid renting. So we settled for house number two. But soon after, our first child was born and we felt squeezed for space. So we put house number two on the market. Unfortunately, we paid a few thousand dollars to sell house number two for realtor fees. This mistake cost us part of a down payment on house number three, putting us further in debt.

[Carvana Narrator]

Why?

[Amanda Cruz]

We should have kept renting one. Better cash flow. Our mortgage payment was more than rent. Property taxes and homeowners insurance bumped up the monthly costs. And since we had a small down payment, we had private mortgage insurance or pmi. On top of that, if we had kept renting, we would have had more monthly cash flow Number two, to save more, that is Opportunity cost. What if we saved all the money spent on down payments? Pmi, homeowners insurance, repairs and maintenance. Renting longer would have given us time to save an emergency fund. Plus it might have allowed us to afford a home that better fit our needs later. Number three, to take on less risk, little savings, a variable interest loan and PMI add up to a considerable financial risk. If emergency expenses popped up, we would have been in trouble. Also, if Alan's company hadn't paid our moving expenses for house number one, he would have passed up a great career opportunity because we wouldn't have been able to afford to move. Four to be more flexible to our credit, we planned on staying in both homes longer, but we were young and things changed fast as a result. We only lived in house number one for three months and house number two for 16 months. Renting would have allowed us to be flexible with our finances and location, so we could have had more savings and moving would have been much more manageable. But unfortunately, in both situations, having to sell a house complicated everything and if we hadn't been able to sell, we would have been stuck. And number five to lower stress to say that buying and selling a home is stressful is an understatement. We learned a lot going through the process, but it was nerve wracking. Some thoughts were what if we can't sell the house? What if we had a major repair? What if we experience job loss? And what if we can't afford to move? Closing Thoughts Buying a home can and does make sense for many people. It's a place of your own and it builds equity. But it's not for everyone and it doesn't always make sense. We became homeowners too soon and it cost us in many ways. We're fortunate to have gotten through that relatively unscathed, and though it worked out in the end, it could have been devastating to our finances. Happily, we eventually recovered and raised our kids in house number three. You just listened to the post titled we should have Rented Instead of Buying by Amanda Cruz of WomenWho Money.com tax

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[Amanda Cruz]

Delivery fees may apply in my area, real estate prices are inflated, so I wouldn't buy now. But I'm glad I bought my house in 2018. I have seen data that supports that on average, over long periods of time, renting and owning work out to be about the same cost wise. With owning your mortgage is the least amount you will pay per month, your property taxes will continue to go up and you're on the hook for maintenance and large repairs like a roof h vac, etc. But you could potentially lock in a low interest rate if you buy at the right time and you don't have many of the same restrictions as renting. With renting, your rent is the most you will pay, but you face the reality of being priced out by rising rents. So for example, in New York City, I had to move almost every year because the rent went up $100. You might also disagree with your landlord on required maintenance, like when one of my New York City landlords refused to get an exterminator for our roach problem. It can be harder to rent with pets and you're restricted on making the place your own. For example, often you're not permitted to paint, etc. Buying a primary residence is a lifestyle choice, not an investment. I think the issue is that most people make the choice to buy before they're financially ready and so the costs become unmanageable. Not only should you have the 20% down payment and be able to afford the mortgage and property taxes, but you should have the cash reserves to deal with the large expenses that come up. I think buying a house is the last thing you should do. First, get out of high interest debt, save your cash reserves, get a good head start on retirement investments, and then buy a house if it's really that important to you. But this whole cultural norm around homeownership is very misguided in my opinion, and that should do it for today. Thank you for being a subscriber or follower of the show and sharing it with others. It really goes a long way to keep this podcast going. Have a great rest of your day, and I'll see you tomorrow, where your optimal life awaits.