← Overcoming Distractions-Thriving with ADHD, ADD
Overcoming Distractions-Thriving with ADHD, ADD
Managing Your Nervous System and Energy for the ADHD Professional
00:41:23
Loading summary
Transcript61 lines
- [00:08]
A
I'm Dave Greenwood and this is Overcoming Distractions. If you are an adult with adhd, a busy professional, an entrepreneur, a high achiever, or just need some strategies to navigate your adult adhd, you're in the right place. Who am I? I'm an entrepreneur with ADHD and the author of two books, Overcoming Distract and Overcoming Burnout. I coach and mentor people just like you, and together we navigate the ups and downs of adult adhd, from getting out of our own way to helping people just like you thrive in the workplace. That's what I do. Want more info on working with me? Hit overcoming distractions.com ready? Let's get to today's podcast. All right, gang back. It's Overcoming Distractions. You know who you are. If you're new, welcome. If you are a, a wise listener who has been with us for a while, welcome back. I always enjoy the downloads wherever they come from. So if you are that busy professional as that super, like skilled, like promo announcer just said, you know, you're in the right place. So, PhD, CEO, executive, small business owner, if you're challenged with a little bit of adhd, you think you have adhd, then you're welcome. So, hey, we are gonna talk about the power of the nervous system today. We're going to talk about maybe regulating that a little bit, maybe some things that might be going on in our subconscious mind. We're going to talk about aligning our energy. And if you know me, if you've listened to me for any length of time, you know me and the word energy, that's again, one of my kind of favorite words. Because I think everything we do revolves around managing our energy. Time management, to do list, you get it? Being fulfilled. So, and as I'm sure most of you have figured out by now, being a busy person with ADHD is more than just kind of trying to figure out that to do list, right? There's a lot of stuff going on in our heads and that requires some energy. But some of us, we might have some stuff sticking around in our head for longer than we we thought. So, so we're going to discuss that as well. I think anybody, any of us that call ourselves neurodivergent ADHD think we might have adhd. As I said, we need to start thinking about managing our nervous system. It can be our friend, it can stop us in our tracks. And I think in some parts of our life it can be maybe a barrier to making some important decisions or having some peace of mind or feeling fulfilled at the end of the day or the end of the week. So, so we're going to dig into that in just a second. But you know that I spend hundreds and hundreds of hours producing this podcast, right? So if you want to support it in just a tiny way, just you can go to Buy me a coffee slash overcoming D. Because they didn't let me spell out distractions for some reason. So it's buy me a coffee slash overcoming D. You can buy me one coffee, you can buy me three, you can buy me five. Uh, my doctors told me to cut back on coffee, but I'm not going to be listening to him. So, so let's just leave it at that. And if you are that busy professional and maybe you need a little more support and guidance, you need somebody that gets you, then you can just hit Overcoming distractions dot com, book that button right at the top of the homepage says chat with me for 15 minutes, see if we're a good fit and we can go from there. So. All right, cool. We have Teresa Lear Levine. She is a EFT master practitioner. She's going to explain what that is in a moment. If you don't know, certified hypnotherapist. And this isn't the hyp, this isn't the hypnosis where you cluck like a chicken. So let's just, let's just make that perfectly clear. And she's the founder of Becoming more me. She supports high achieving entrepreneurs just like yourself. You have adhd. Maybe this past trauma, maybe there's some limiting beliefs, alignment. We're gonna, you know, we're gonna talk about how she creates that pleasure fueled lives and maybe kind of minimize some of that anxiety and overwhelm. So welcome.
- [05:04]
B
Oh, thank you so much, David. It's fun to be here. I'm excited to be. It feels like my people, your listeners, because that's, that's how I think about my, that kind of busy minded ADHD entrepreneur.
- [05:14]
A
Thanks for having me. No, and I think that that's who we serve. I think both of us meet with a lot of people who are in that situation. It could be a CEO, it could be the owner of a small business, as you say, maybe an entrepreneur trying to grow something. And there's a lot of people that maybe don't get them, get that, you know, get their situation, the challenges and maybe how to foster those strengths. So I think we can get into that. But you know, first, I think a lot of people, I think many people with adhd, I think you may agree in the beginning, think that maybe this is something to fix. Right. Adhd, we gotta fix this, we gotta fix that. So I'd love to start out by just in your kind of experience in working with people, how we can, you know, collectively reframe this kind of liability into maybe try to get people to focus more on their strengths. I think a lot of people probably come to you and me and they say, I can't get out of my own way. And maybe that's a good starting point. But how do we kind of, you know, not to go as far as the superpower, but to just kind of help them understand that we can leverage those strengths?
- [06:36]
B
Yeah, because absolutely. It's not something to be fixed for. Sure. In fact, I've gotten to the point where, like, I noticed those strength and those superpowers so much that even if I could, like, take a pill to fix it or something, I don't think I'd ever really want to. There's, I feel like, a lot of upsides to having adhd. So it's more like instead of how do I fix adhd, it's like, how do I work with my brain so that my strengths can lead the way? Right, Right. Many ADHD entrepreneurs or professionals are already high capacity. Right?
- [07:07]
A
Right.
- [07:07]
B
Sometimes that also means we're like high functioning. Anxiety and things like that too. But, you know, we can kind of burn ourselves trying to operate like we're neurotypical. Right. As far as the way that we plan or the way that we operate. So ADHD is often kind of like a mismatch issue. Not anything to fix or anything that's broken. Like when the task or the timeline or the expectations don't match the brain, then you end up with like, shame or avoidance, that kind of a thing. So when the work does match the brain, novelty, meaning urgency, all these things that our ADHD brains love. Right. Creativity, momentum, then that's when we become unstoppable. So there's a lot of strengths. Right. Our pattern recognition cognition can be just phenomenal. Big picture thinking and hyperfocus. God, I love the hyperfocus. Now, you can't always get that to kick in quite when you think it would be the. The best, but it is, like, so fascinating. Right. And then we're such fast problem solvers under pressure.
- [08:18]
A
I think so, yeah.
- [08:20]
B
Often have heightened empathy and intuition. And then like the energy and momentum, like when we're inspired, then we have great energy and great momentum. So really being able to tap into where those things are happening for us and the, the how piece that makes it Kind of actionable because the goal isn't to become consistent like someone else or whatever else. It's to build a system that supports your strengths.
- [08:47]
A
Yeah, yeah, no, I agree. And again, I think we, we, we spend so much energy trying to manage ways that might not totally work for us that we don't take the time for that inventory to say, you know what? These are the things I'm really good at, you know, So I, I had mentioned in a podcast a few episodes ago, I was listening to a book called the Science of scaling. It's Dr. Benjamin Hardy. And you know, some people might go, what the hell are you talking about? But because it's not an ADHD book. It's a book about how to grow a, you know, scale a business, you know, rapidly. But he talks a lot about what not to do, you know, not like, here's the blueprint to grow your business. He spends like a good chunk of the book, like, telling you what to slash and burn, you know, and focus on the things you're good at. And I think there's a lesson in that. Right?
- [09:44]
B
Absolutely, Absolutely. And like you said, you know, we often don't take the time to kind of like, figure out like, how to leverage our strengths. I think that was one of the things. So getting into kind of the nervous system side of things. Oftentimes ADHD entrepreneurs and professionals also have the anxiety component. It's very common and it can make it really difficult for us to feel safe slowing down to figure things out. And that was probably one of the most difficult things for me to embody and integrate. But then once I did, it's like, ah, like honestly, just the ability to slow down once a week for an hour to an hour and a half to plan my next week was such an unlock for me because usually I would sit down to try to plan the week ahead and then I would just start trying to do the things instead of actually create plan.
- [10:37]
A
Well, no, that's like, that's like a hallmark of like that busy person with adhd. I mean, I've lost count about how many times where I've been working with somebody. And you know, I said, well, what do you do in the morning? Well, I just, you know, do my thing, get the kid on the bus. And then I just show up to my office and sit down at my desk and just kind of decide what to work on. And it's, you know, it's everything from that habit of doing that way to also like the logistical thing, like, well, I work in a bunch of cubicles and, you know, well, is there a conference room you can go in and just, like, peace out for a few minutes and just like. Just like brain dumper. Just, you know, you. You know, we. We are, I think, the busy person with adhd, the entrepreneur. Many are guilty of not hitting that pause button. And I think it's. It's one of the most simple things we can do to just get our shit together. Right.
- [11:30]
B
Right. Is like speed without direction is like. It can look productive, but it's kind of like trying to sprint with your shoelaces tied together. It just. It doesn't really get. You want to go.
- [11:41]
A
Right? Yeah. So I know in. In my book Overcoming Burnout, and I will say it's not an ADHD book, although there's many references to ADHD in there. We did talk about eft. We talked about some other types of. Of things that people did to start to get on a path of feeling more fulfilled and less stressed and, you know, kind of deal with everything that's been going on. So for those that do not know what EFT is, or maybe they've heard of it, I guess, and even hypnosis, but let's start with eft. So how does. How does that modality kind of help somebody support that emotional regulation and other things that maybe somebody may be challenged with with adhd?
- [12:42]
B
Yeah, for sure. So just to kind of give a short synopsis of what EFT actually is, and then the. What it does is really way more fascina. Um, it's a very simple, practical tool to calm your nervous system and help you to process what you're feeling. So it puts together ancient Chinese medicine, which would be these meridian endpoints, these different places on our body where if you were to go have a massage or have acupuncture or whatever, they'd be working in these places because they know that's where the energy gets blocked. And any kind of disruption or blockage in our energy creates the dis. Ease, whether that's a headache or whether that's focus issues when you're trying to do something, procrastinating, any of that kind of stuff is some kind of an energetic blockage. Right. And then it combines that. So we're actually tapping with our fingertips on these different meridian endpoints. We've discovered that there's about nine of them that just really over the whole system. Even though we have thousands of these different meridians in our body, we only need nine of them to really get the results that we want. We combine that with modern Day psychology. So actually addressing and kind of speaking to the issue in an honest and truthful way. We're not trying to jump to the end result or avoid the way that we're actually feeling or be, you know, toxically positive about it. We're really addressing the way that we actually feel. And in doing that, we can disrupt these patterns and we can also kind of like dislodge these energetic blockages. Because what's happening is that we're sending a signal pretty much immediately, within the first few seconds of starting this process, right, to our amygdala, which is where, you know, fight, flight, freeze, flee, flop, fuck, whatever. It's all the things that. And we get to calm that first. And then the rationality, the choice, the agency, all of those things return very quickly when we can lower the stress hormones, lower cortisol. It's been really interesting. In certain studies, they show that, you know, in just five minutes of EFT tapping, we can lower our stress hormones up to like, 4, 43%, which is just insane. It still boggles my mind whenever I think about it, because, you know, you might be focusing on your feelings about procrastination or something that you're kind of beating yourself up about, but lowering your stress hormones is making everything kind of just more open, more relaxed. You start noticing other areas of your life where things are shifting. It's. It's kind of uncanny. But I'll have a lot of clients where we'll be working on, you know, past trauma or other things that are kind of their current everyday struggles. And a month after we start working together, they're like, oh, and I lost ten pounds. You know, it's like.
- [15:17]
A
And that. That's interesting.
- [15:19]
B
And.
- [15:19]
A
And I think there's a myth, maybe that's a strong word, but I think there's a misconception about trauma, chronic stress, that it's all like in your. Your head, so to speak. I don't mean that like you're, you know, you're telling yourself a lie. Don't. I mean, it's just like that stress and what have you is stored like in the brain and like you say, in the amygdala and those other parts that you know. But I think a lot of research, you've probably seen this because it goes back to the eft. That modality is that a lot of this stuff is actually stored in your body. Right. And when you release that, you begin the process of helping your brain begin to be in a better place. Right?
- [16:08]
B
Absolutely. It's, you know, vessel Vander Kolk had the whole book that everybody loves, Body Keeps the Score. And the saying is just so incredibly true. Trauma, chronic stress, our body responses, it's, it's all intertwined. And the example, like I said with that with clients that'll say they, they've lost weight just really kind of shows it. You know, people say that it's all in your head. You're missing the part where your brain and your body are a system together. Right? So like chronic stress and trauma aren't just thoughts, they're like repeated physiological states. So then the stress response, whether that's, you know, cortisol, adrenaline, inflammation in the body, tense muscles, not sleeping well, having issues with your digestion or whatever else, can stay on long after whatever the event is. So times those disruptions can continue. And it's kind of this cumulative like wear and tear that happens. And we see like long term links between like, you know, the early adversity and the stress physiology and then like later health outcomes too. So. And that's why, like, trauma, informed care matters, right?
- [17:31]
A
Yeah. No, and I think you're seeing that term a lot more in the workplace and you know, any. Even in HR circles and where they're beginning to kind of understand that. So, I mean, I, I think that anxiety is common with people with adhd, whether we kind of recognize it or not. Right. We're just, we're in that kind of mode and, and especially for like that high performer, the person in that demanding career, right. There's a lot of pressure and then there's the pressure from home and then there's the kids and then, you know, there's just a million things going on. You know, I've talked to a lot of people where, like, for example, like before kids, like, oh, I was crushing it in business and you know, and all of a sudden, you know, you know, my son was born and didn't happen overnight, but like 18 months into it, the, the like, holy crap, I can't, I can't keep up anymore, you know, so.
- [18:29]
B
But did it for me for sure. I mean, I'm a mom of four boys, so it was somewhere between the second one and the third one that, you know, when you run out of like enough hands to hold them all at the same time.
- [18:41]
A
Right? Yeah.
- [18:42]
B
Like the laundry becomes a mountain. And. Yeah.
- [18:45]
A
I always wonder how, like, people like you, when I see them in the mall and I'm like, holy crap.
- [18:50]
B
Yeah. I mean, that's when it. I didn't get diagnosed with ADHD until I was 40. 2. And it's not that it wasn't like, there was never any doubt that it was there, but I had.
- [19:02]
A
Hello.
- [19:04]
B
The youngest at that point had all been diagnosed, and I was like, well, maybe I should also get diagnosed so they feel less, like, alone in this, because I know it didn't come from dad. We can. We can share that together. And it's actually been a really healthy part of our journey. I know my. My youngest, before he was diagnosed, was, like, hoping he had the diagnosis because he saw his older brothers, like, they're so creative and they're so amazing, and I want to be like them. And this is why I think I have adhd. I'm like, we really have flipped the narrative into being a very positive thing around here and noticing when those superpowers show up.
- [19:35]
A
Right. Yeah. So. So on that. Do you have an example of that. That pattern or that narrative? And. And how. How we, you know, by trying to shift that, we can make some kind of lasting change that. That just, you know, benefits our ADHD brain.
- [20:00]
B
Like, the narrative of it being, like, more of a superpower or a positive thing or. Yeah.
- [20:05]
A
And again, I think there's a lot of people that would disagree with the superpower word, because I do think there are people that hear that and they go, well, you know, you're not living in my shoes. But again, you know, you talked about that, the creativity and. And all that, but I mean, how does. Does, you know, the work in EFT and even hypnosis, does that help people begin to shift those patterns? And I'm not saying, like, oh, I went to a Tony Robbins thing for three days, and now I'm a completely different person. But it is a process, right?
- [20:40]
B
Yeah. So, yeah, EFT can help with adhd, because a lot of what looks like I can't focus is actually nervous system activation. Right. So overwhelm, pressure, boredom, intolerance, shape, fear of failing. All of these kind of things that come up pretty typically. I see them a lot. In my world, when your body's in that state, then your executive function drops. And that's, you know, a lot of people that are dealing with ADHD are looking for help with their executive functioning. And so you can have the best intentions and still feel like you're frozen. And then there's all those other, you know, those states that we were talking about with the amygdala. So tapping can support in real life by, like, lowering the internal noise, calming that stress response so that, you know, that feeling of, you know, you've got A million tabs open in your brain or literally on your computer, like I do most days, and then discharge that emotional part of it so that it feels like less threatening or less like a flaw. It can also help with the emotional reactivity. A lot of us are very like rejection sensitive. You know, there a lot of spiraling there after, you know, a criticism or we receive a, an email that's tough to read or some kind of perceived rejection. Tapping can really help you to come back to a baseline faster and then you don't lose the whole day to being in your head and, you know, telling yourself stories. Basically you can get back to more of like the capital T truth of what's going on and more embodied and grounded and present. And then it can also help to interrupt like procrastination loops and things. So instead of forcing yourself, you can use tapping to work on like what's true. Okay, well, you know, part of me doesn't want to do this, or maybe it feels too big or whatever the case may be. And then you can still be able to take some kind of a small next step without fighting yourself to do it. And all of those little gentle shifts make a really big cumulative difference over time. You know, it doesn't, like we were saying before, it doesn't fix ADHD and it's not the goal anyway. But it does support the nervous system so that the ADHD strategies can actually work. And that was why I fell in love with it so much, because I always felt like I know what to do. Smart person. I read a ton of books. I could tell you, like the how I'm supposed to get whatever this thing is that I'm trying to do done. And then it was like hitting an invisible wall when I actually tried to implement the steps of it. And once I started to nourish my nervous system, the byproduct of which is a regulated system, then it was like, oh, wow, I can actually like take action on these things that felt inactionable beforehand.
- [23:30]
A
Right. And I think I, I like to tell people that, you know, when, when they go and book that 15 minute call and say, hey, I think Dave, maybe somebody I want to work with.
- [23:43]
B
Yeah.
- [23:44]
A
You know, I tell people that I do work on the mechanics of adhd. So, I mean, I'm not a therapist, I'm not a doctor, I'm, you know, but we work on the mechanics, we try to kind of figure out how to sort out those days, those weeks, focus on the strengths, those, those types of things. But I think what you're talking about is some, a lot of times that does work. We, we have some self awareness that's huge. But I'm always, always trying to understand how somebody can slow down and, and kind of, you know, and I think even by slowing down and for example, going on Spotify and doing a five minute guided meditation can slow you down and that can help you just process things a little more clearly. Right? And that goes back to your, you know, comments about, about the nervous system. I think we leave that part out where it's just like, oh, cool, if I just buy a new, you know, red notebook and I put my to do list, then cool, I just fixed my problem. Right? It's, it's a lot more complex than that. Right. And I think, yeah, you're going to.
- [25:03]
B
Realize it until you have the whole drawer full of the new notebooks that are half.
- [25:07]
A
Oh, how many times have I seen that? It's like, oh, I got six new notebooks off Amazon. I'm like, okay, well the effort was an A. But, but I mean, we got to find those ways to slow down. And to your. Maybe some people need more than the five minutes on Spotify. They need something like eft, right? They need to kind of, they need to connect into their nervous system. Right?
- [25:33]
B
Yeah. Because most of our resistance, and it's a lot of resistance, right, isn't about whatever the task is, whatever the project is, whatever the thing is, it's about what it means and whether that means that it's pressure or fear of failing or being judged or just the uncertainty. I mean, life is full of uncertainty and we can't, there's really no way to get around that. But slowing down does help to settle the body and to turn from the task being danger into doable. And I find that a lot of people just need help at first getting over the discomfort of slowing down. Like there's major resistance to slowing down even because we've associated so much threat with that. Like, everything's gonna fall apart if I just rest. And that's where I love to bring in things like, you know, pleasure and joy and things like that, because those things make, make it easier to slow down more enjoyable and they let us feel more fulfilled as we bring them in. And it's amazing to me how many people don't even know what they actually enjoy or find pleasurable from their day to day. And it doesn't have to be something big. I mean, pleasure can be just making a cup of something you love to drink and having it while you're Doing something that is less than fun to do or just little things that can accompany your day so that you're actually feeling more, you know, getting in an emotional connection with what we want to actually want is so incredibly important and yet so many of us. And this is kind of, I guess, kind of a transition into the hypnotherapy. For instance, like I was, I was talking with one of my clients today. She, unfortunately, she was in a car accident yesterday after we had a session. And she has this like mental pattern of connecting. You know, if I do too well or if I succeed, then the other shoe's gonna drop. So she actually had this situation the other day where they, you know, they won a sum of money. I think it was like a scratch off lottery ticket or something. So they were going out to dinner to celebrate and then they get rear ended by a drunk driver afterwards and her brain automatically couples the two. Okay.
- [27:42]
A
Like something's funny you mentioned that. Because it, I think so many of us feel that way. It's like we had a good day and then all of a sudden like, like that night something bad happened. I've caught myself doing that as well. It's just like it, you know, like you like, oh, my cash flow just like really improved. And then all of a sudden, ah, crap, my, my heater in the house just died. Well, that was short lived, right?
- [28:06]
B
Or was it? And you know, we never really get to see the whole, whole picture or where, you know, in hindsight these things might actually be blessings in disguise or whatever. But, but the problem comes when we like couple those things up together, which were very individual events. And so when we do something like hypnotherapy, which I'm sure I'll be doing with her after this holiday break here on this sort of thing, we'll be looking at kind of regressing to those places where she's paired. You know, if something goes too well, then something bad's going to happen. Because I can guarantee it wasn't a pattern that just started last night when she had this, you know, this unfortunate incident happened.
- [28:43]
A
Oh yeah. You didn't just immediately like, you know, develop a new pattern.
- [28:46]
B
Yeah, but when we use hypnotherapy then we can look at that on a subconscious level. Because I always say the subconscious is like the biggest Google Drive. Like even if you think like, I don't remember stuff that happened in my childhood or whatever else. So. No, it doesn't, you know, no bother in doing that. Your subconscious remembers. You know, even for people who have dementia or whatever else. Like your subconscious has got a hold on all of those things and you are still running patterns that you picked up before the age of 10 as if they're just fact. And it's.
- [29:17]
A
And I think if I hear you and I, I've, you know, I've learned this in several that, that those things are there, but it's how you let them control you in the present moment. Right. Like there may be a lot of stuff that happened when you were younger. I always talk about the bad report cards because it's like a lot of us were in that cat, especially the boys, you know, so. But there's other things that going on, you know, family trauma, different things like that and, and how we, a lot of people, whether ADHD or not, they allow, allow that, that's a strong word. But controls their present activities, their mood, their. Etc rather than trying to manage that in a certain way. Correct?
- [30:10]
B
Yeah, for sure. So we all have different patterns and these different like paradigms and things that we've, we've developed over, over time. Right. Most of our day to day reactions are subconscious and it's because the subconscious mind is basically the part of you that runs on autopilot. Like you're saying these habits, these emotional reflexes, attachment responses that you might. Money responses, patterns with procrastination, it's all trying to keep you safe and efficient because of some old story or thing that got dropped in there earlier. So it pulls from the past to predict the present. And you know, that's how the past ends up steering you in the present moment. You're not reacting to, you know, the email or the tone of something or a number in your bank account. You're reacting to what your system taught you that those things mean when we assign meaning to everything. So it's like where and when did you assign the meaning that this was threatening or whatever else. So then hypnosis becomes kind of like a bridge there because it works at the level that the pattern lives. So if the conscious mind is the part that's like making plans and things, then the subconscious mind is the part that actually executes so you can know better. Like I felt like I did all those years. It's like how can I know all this stuff and yet I'm still showing up in this way that just does not align with how I want to be, you know, behaving or relating or building a business or whatever else. And that's the frustrating part because you can still just do the old thing even when you know, better, because insight doesn't automatically update the program. So we can.
- [32:00]
A
That's a good point. Yeah. There's a lot of. There's a lot of work involved in. In that. Right? Yeah.
- [32:06]
B
Right. Yeah.
- [32:07]
A
Like you say, you don't just go back and say, up, here's my. Here's my new to do list. This is going to work. Yeah. You know. Yeah. There's a lot of work involved in understanding what is going to work. You know, I mean, that's a very basic example, but yeah.
- [32:22]
B
Yeah. And how you want to be. I was, I was kind of chuckling in your intro when you were talking about, like, hypnosis isn't the kind that make you, like, cluck like a chicken and stuff, because people have been kind of indoctrinated. See, hypnotherapy or hypnosis as like the, the Vegas stage stuff. Or like, here I'm going to wave a watch and you're getting sleepy and that kind of thing. And that's not it at all. All hypnosis is self hypnosis. You are always in control and you are only going to take on suggestions. We're all super highly suggestible beings, but we're only going to take on the suggestions and hypnosis that are for our highest good. So you're definitely not unconscious. You're actually more focused in that state and more receptive. Where we find the emotional learning that's underneath the pattern, where we can, you know, change the associations of things. Kind of like my, my client and the car accident and the winning money and stuff, and where we can rehearse new responses until the body is going to treat those things as if they're familiar. Right. And that's what helps to create choice in the present instead of continuing, just follow that same pattern.
- [33:27]
A
So I always want people to come to this podcast because I want them to be able to think about things that they can take away. So. So what are some kind of practical in the moment tools, somebody that they can use if they're overwhelmed, really distracted at work. Things are just not going the way they'd like during a, you know, a period of time. What are kind of some of those in the moment tools that, that you suggest or work with people on?
- [34:04]
B
Yeah, I mean, when you're feeling yourself in. In some kind of a spiral or a freeze or whatever's happening, the easiest tool that we all have to grab onto in the moment is our breath. That's. That's seriously like. And it seems so simple because we're Just breathing all day anyway, so we're like, okay, I'm already doing that. But, but really just taking a moment to just feel yourself in your body. Maybe a hand to the chest, a nice slow inhale through the nose, and an even slower exhale while you're just kind of naming what's going on. Whether that's okay, noticing my chest is tight or my mind is racing, or part of me is feeling a lot of pressure right now. And of course, eft tapping. There's just great ways that you can implement that in, like, under a couple of minutes. And I have tons of, you know, videos and examples and things like that that, you know, I can, I can give you guys all a link to so that you can grab those. But in the moment, breathing and acknowledging what you're feeling is super powerful, even though it sounds ridiculously simple.
- [35:09]
A
And it could be 90 seconds or two minutes right at your desk, like between meetings and just kind of, like just kind of as long as it.
- [35:18]
B
Takes to take a couple of breaths and really just, you know, feel yourself in your body and acknowledge what's going on. Because when we can, when we can speak to the problem and shed a little bit of light on it, it usually kind of, it usually shrinks a little bit.
- [35:30]
A
I always joke to my wife that I'm going to go out to the Berkshires in Massachusetts at the time of my choosing to go to one of those silent retreats for like, two weeks.
- [35:40]
B
Yeah, Idea too. And then I, it also. Does it freak you out also, like, the thought of it.
- [35:46]
A
It. Not anymore. It used to. Years ago, like, we went up, we went to vacation years ago up in Maine and we rented a cabin and I was crawling out of my skin after like, three days because, like, there was no TV or anything. So we went down to the pub and watched CNN and drank some beers and stuff like that. Now I give me a, Give me a shack in the woods and, you know, take a hammer to my cell phone and I, I'd be good.
- [36:18]
B
Absolutely. I've played with it. I think, I think I'd love to do a silent retreat. And the dark retreats are the ones that I think I'd have a harder time coming to terms with. You're seeing those, like, probably go into, like, the total darkness for a period.
- [36:30]
A
I don't know if I do that. I want the silent retreat, but I also want, like, meat, potatoes and beer, so I don't know if they do those. But, you know, I, I, I don't need to talk to anybody for a couple weeks. But I, I do need some barbecue and, you know, a nice beer. So, but, so as we wrap up, people listening, they feel like they've tried everything. You know, they're, they're that busy person with adhd. What do you want them to understand about, you know, that, that change, whether it's slow change or awareness or, you know, what is, what is actually possible through slowing down the breath work, the modalities that you work in? Because I think there's a lot of people, people come to me and they say, I've been through three ADHD coaches and, you know, it was all just like ADHD kind of things, you know, I mean, my experience comes from, you know, being an entrepreneur, being an executive, having to manage other people, all that, you know, running my own, you know, PR firm for 20 years. So. But there are, there are people who have tried a lot of things and worked with a lot of people, and maybe they haven't gotten what they want. So I guess in a very long winded, roundabout way, what do you want people to understand about when they feel like they've tried everything?
- [38:00]
B
Yeah, and sometimes it's not about the modality, it's almost like about how it's delivered or who you're working with or taking guidance from the, that the different perspectives can make such a difference in the way that trying something new works. And what changes things is not finding the perfect hack. We're all looking for easy way through, but it's about learning to work with what's actually running. The programming in the moment, the body stress response, the emotional charge, the old protective programming. And the goal isn't to become, you know, some consistent robot. You know, it's about regaining choice. And when you're activated, you can come back to yourself later and faster, just start smaller, follow through more, and not beat yourself up. As much. Like, that's really the big goal as far as I'm concerned. Like, the more we can do that and just come back to ourselves faster, the more enjoyable it all gets.
- [39:00]
A
Cats. Yeah, I, I, you know, I've told people, you know, your brain is your brain. We are where we are. Let's not kick the crap out of ourselves. Let's not, you know, and I think a lot of people struggle with things that aren't necessarily in their control, and we need to give ourselves some grace, like, like the bad boss or the coworker that is making your life miserable, or, you know, they come to people like us and others then, and they go, I can't manage This. I can't manage that. And then when we dig in, we realize that, you know what? You got to cut yourself some slack. Right?
- [39:36]
B
Right. I mean, I think the biggest thing is, like, nobody has failed at change. Usually it's that you're using tools that don't match the system that you're trying to update or transform.
- [39:50]
A
Yep. Yep. Cool. All right. How can people find you? I'm confident you have a website where people can. You can guide people to the next step.
- [40:01]
B
That's the best place. It's just my name, David. It's Teresa with an H. So T H E R E S A Lear L E A R Levine L E V I n e theresalierlevine.com and because I am an ADHD entrepreneur, my website is so freaking simple. It's just gonna give you, like, links to exactly what you want to find. You don't need to read a bunch of stuff. It's just, like, it'll take you directly to where you want to go. Whether you want to join my free community, which has a classroom full of lots of different, you know, EFT rounds and videos and audios for hypnosis and great workshops and things, or you want to follow me on social media or book a call. All of that is, like, right there, just laid out for you.
- [40:40]
A
Cool. All right, well, as I always say, us podcasters will put it in the show notes, so you can, whether you're on Apple, Spotify, or on my website, just click and you will be immediately directed to Teresa's very simplistic website. So cool. Hey, thanks for sharing. That was very informative. Dig a little deeper on why we do things, why we don't do things. So we'll have to have you back at some point.