Share & Bang & Tell with Dan Soder and Katie Nolan

Summary

Episode Overview

Podcast: Pablo Torre Finds Out
Episode Title: Share & Bang & Tell with Dan Soder and Katie Nolan
Release Date: July 11, 2025
Host: Pablo Torre
Guests: Dan Soder (comedian), Katie Nolan (sports personality)

This lively, freewheeling episode blends the “Share & Tell” game with hilarious, real-life stories and rapid-fire cultural commentary, featuring comedian Dan Soder and media personality Katie Nolan. The trio dives well beyond surface sports and pop culture takes, meandering through topics spanning skin care and self-tanning mishaps, the “tab hoarding” impulse, Madonna doing standup, billionaires’ ethics and eccentricities, AI’s comedic and artistic limits, Enhanced Games (“steroid Olympics”), memorable internet fights, and the delusions sown by 90s ninja movies.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Embracing the Sun, Self-Tanning Fails & ESP(N) Memories

Timestamps: 00:34–04:24

• Katie Nolan recalls attempting "gradual" self-tanner, ending up with orange elbows:
  • “I put this on one time. Look at my elbows. What the hell’s that?” (K. Nolan, 01:46)
• Pablo admits his dermatologist mother is disappointed in his sunblock aversion.
• They reminisce about the now-closed ESPN Seaport studio and Pablo's “High Noon” show, including:
  • “It was the building where I found out that Pablo was having a baby. He ran out of work and was like, I need you to do High Noon. Goodbye.” (K. Nolan, 03:29)
• Ben Affleck once smoked cigarettes in the ESPN office; Nolan and Soder riff on Boston celebrities’ instant association—"second thought is either Matt Damon or Ben Affleck." (D. Soder, 03:57)

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2. Madonna Tries Stand-Up & Celebrity Privilege in Comedy

Timestamps: 04:44–08:23

• Dan Soder shares how Madonna performed unannounced standup sets at the Comedy Cellar:
  • “...she bombed for 30 [minutes]...She was doing the thing, ‘You guys hate me,’ and then she just bomb again.” (D. Soder, 06:47)
• The group jokes about Madonna’s "observational" comedy, referencing her “Sex” book and poking fun at pop icons overreaching.
• Pablo reads excerpts from a 1992 NYT review of Madonna’s book; Katie and Dan joke about its notoriety during their puberty years.

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3. Tab Hoarding, Sky Palace, and Mental Clutter

Timestamps: 11:44–14:19

• Katie confesses keeping 500+ tabs open on her phone, framing it as “showing my mental illness to you.” (K. Nolan, 13:17)
• Discussions about "Sky Palace," their home, and its customized neon sign.
• Nolan describes saving articles on topics like Pixar’s “talking blobs” and feeling compelled to investigate AI’s impact on animation in the future.

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4. AI Slop, Impressions & Humor’s Human Limits

Timestamps: 14:43–20:34

• AI Impressions and “Slop” Culture: Soder is amazed by AI-generated content; Pablo and Katie joke about the weirdness of “Hank Hill Trap rapping.”
  • “They’re doing, like, full songs...with Hank Hill, and I’m like, alright, well, this is too much.” (D. Soder, 16:04)
• “Glass fruit cutting” ASMR videos: Katie admits brain-melting enjoyment of oddly satisfying AI videos.
• Will AI Replace Comedy?
  • Katie: “The last thing AI is going to be good at is humor. I don’t think AI is funny.” (K. Nolan, 19:45)
  • Pablo: “Humor is fundamentally social. Implicit context clues.” (P. Torre, 19:54)
  • Soder: “I don’t think AI will be able to replicate [the human soul]...” (D. Soder, 20:15)
• Jokes about Grok, Elon Musk’s AI, being shut down and its potential for a “Netflix tragic AI doc.”

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5. Billionaires, Enhanced Games, and Eternal Life

Timestamps: 21:06–34:56

• Katie proposes that billionaires (like Peter Thiel) should be fined when making anti-human statements:
  • “We should be able to fine you the way that the NBA would fine a player. When they disparage the refs.” (K. Nolan, 22:27)
• They riff on Thiel’s weird, “alien” vibes and the moral anxiety of transhumanist billionaire culture—equating Thiel to a “Men in Black” cockroach and suggesting he needs to be “mommaged” (have a strong-willed partner like Jordan Hudson for Sean “Diddy” Combs).
• Enhanced Games (“steroid Olympics”):
  • Pablo explains Thiel-backed Enhanced Games: “The idea is...the brainchild of Dr. Aaron D'Souza, the Australian lawyer who helped mastermind Thiel’s proxy war against Gawker...” (P. Torre, 30:36)
  • Soder and Nolan are aghast at the “eternal life” sales pitch:
    • “I can’t relate to the desire to want to live forever.” (K. Nolan, 31:19)
  • Discussing the event’s risks, possible deaths, and its 2026 Las Vegas debut.

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6. The Art, Chaos, and Comedy of Tab Browsing

Timestamps: 34:56–41:15

• Nolan shares random tabs: reheating chicken parm, New Yorker’s “The Case Against Travel,” Jeopardy study tips, injury lookups, Sonic burgers, Chekhov’s Gun, and more.
• Soder compares this to “cleaning out your locker at the end of the school year.” (D. Soder, 33:14)
• Pablo delights in how Chekhov's Gun appears thematically—“Bang, bang, there it is. That’s podcasting.” (D. Soder, 46:22)

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7. “Bang, Bang, Bang”—Golf Course Internet Fight

Timestamps: 35:03–39:45

• Pablo reveals viral golf course fight footage; the internet ID’ed one fighter as ex-NHL enforcer Nick Tarnasky.
• They break down the “bang, bang, bang!” brawl:
  • “I have acquired a certain amount of CTE in the NHL I’m about to unleash.” (D. Soder, 38:50)
  • “If I could fight, I would absolutely be saying bang as I rang a dude’s bell.” (D. Soder, 39:08)

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8. 90's Ninja Movies & Childhood Delusions

Timestamps: 40:46–44:11

• The mythos of Three Ninjas and the false confidence it gave children in their fighting skills:
  • “Three Ninjas really had a generation of little boys believing with a small amount of mini mall taekwondo we could beat up grown men...” (D. Soder, 41:30)
• Discussion about karate class dropouts, 90s ninja mania (“You could put ninja on anything and everyone’s like, I love it.” – D. Soder, 43:35).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Madonna doing comedy:
  • “She's done stand up at the Comedy Cellar...and the Thing that I heard was that when she was like, wasn’t doing well, she was doing the thing where she was going, 'you guys hate me.'” (D. Soder, 06:27)
• Why AI comedy fails:
  • “I think the last thing AI is going to be good at is humor. I don’t think AI is funny.” (K. Nolan, 19:45)
• Peter Thiel’s anti-human vibes:
  • “We should be able to fine you the way that the NBA would fine a player.” (K. Nolan, 22:27)
• On tab hoarding:
  • “Katie has kept that tab...I'm keeping it, choosing again right now to keep it.” (K. Nolan, 13:46)
• The viral “Bang, bang, bang!” moment:
  • “Smashing someone’s face and saying bang...If I could fight, I would absolutely be saying bang as I rang a dude’s bell.” (D. Soder, 39:08)
• Three Ninjas & Childhood:
  • “They just walked into boardrooms and they went, kid ninjas...here’s $3 million!” (D. Soder, 43:48)
• Closing the loop:
  • “Honestly, you keeping the tab for Chekhov's gun and only opening it now feels like...the ultimate fulfillment of the Chekhov’s gun.” (P. Torre, 45:51)
  • “Bang, bang. There it is. That’s podcasting.” (D. Soder, 46:22)

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Essential Timestamps for Key Segments

• Self-tanning, skin care, & ESPN nostalgia: 00:34–04:24
• Madonna doing standup & celebrity comedy privilege: 04:44–08:23
• AI “slop”, voices, and humor limits: 14:43–20:34
• Enhanced Games and the ethics of life extension: 30:36–34:56
• Golf course “Bang, bang, bang” viral fight recap: 35:03–39:45
• 90s Ninja movies & the myth of kid martial arts: 40:46–44:11
• Chekhov’s Gun, meta podcasting moment: 45:51–46:22

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Tone and Style

The episode is spontaneous, irreverent, and full of wry in-jokes and quick-witted asides, driven by the rapport between Pablo Torre, Dan Soder, and Katie Nolan. Their conversational style jumps between the deeply silly and the meaningfully philosophical, framed by sharp pop culture references and a healthy skepticism toward tech utopians and nostalgia alike.

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Takeaways for New Listeners

• Expect tangents: This isn’t a tight interview but a warm, chaotic, and insightful hangout.
• Cultural commentary with depth and humor: The trio balances absurd topics (like AI-generated rap songs and self-tanning) with sly critiques of billionaire behavior and the human need for real connection.
• The “Share & Tell” approach: Real-world artifacts (browser tabs, weird news, viral videos) spark stories, confessions, and running jokes—making the episode both highly personal and universally relatable.

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Recommended for:
Fans of sports and pop culture, internet/AI skeptics, anyone who’s ever left too many browser tabs open, and listeners who love smart, breezy comedy with an undercurrent of genuine insight.

Transcript

[A]

I'm Pablo Torre. And this episode of Pablo Torre Finds out is brought to you by Remy Martin. 1738 Accord Royale. Exceptionally smooth cognac for all your game day festivities. Please drink responsibly because today we're going to find out what this sound is.

[B]

What were you doing out there? We put you in the human body for once, and you screwed it up. The water goes on the inside.

[A]

Right after this ad.

[B]

We left the house and we were like, both of us are gonna wear brown. Cause we both feel tan. Cause we went to our friend's pool.

[A]

I was gonna wait.

[C]

So we saw that I have discovered the sun.

[A]

Mm.

[B]

It's good stuff, that vitamin D. People.

[C]

Out there all the time. I had to. Last year I got prescribed, like, weapons grade vitamin D. Me too. They were like, tate, you need to take this every day for you are low.

[B]

You guys are. They're gonna find this clip in like 75 years when we're all mole people. We have to live underground. And they go, could you imagine embracing the sun?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Well, it feels good.

[C]

I've been out there and I've been using my spf. Don't yell at me. Can I share a secret?

[A]

Uhhuh.

[C]

Just here.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

I started using this right before I got the sun. Right before I discovered that the sun will make your skin browner. I got this lotion, and it's supposed to be self tanning gradually because I'm afraid of self tanner. Cause if you do it wrong, your skin is dyed.

[A]

Your Italian heritage crazy.

[C]

It's just like.

[A]

It's a high stakes decision.

[C]

It's scary. So I like, dipped my toe in of like, this. Says if I use it like lotion every day, I'll get a little bit darker, which is how it's felt safe to me. I put this on one time. Look at my elbows. What the hell's that?

[B]

Now I'm crazy.

[A]

You can just push in on Katie's.

[B]

I don't know what the.

[C]

What? This thing lied to me. I used it once and I was like, don't have to worry about how I'm applying it. It's a tiny, gradual tan. Lies.

[B]

We're a WWE house, so there's no judgment. She's just like a pro wrestler.

[A]

My mom is a dermatologist. I do not. This is something that she will call me about. She. She will be mad to hear that I actually just don't use suntan lotion because I'm of the opinion that I have God's natural pigmentation, you know, you don't use.

[B]

You don't use blocker at all?

[A]

At all. At all.

[B]

You never at all.

[A]

Oh, certainly my mom has forced it upon me.

[C]

I have.

[A]

I have a makeup removal routine which Katie has witnessed.

[C]

Okay. Yeah.

[A]

In the. By the way, the seaport's closed. ESPN studio.

[C]

Shut up. I definitely still had stuff.

[A]

Yeah, I was gonna say, I don't.

[B]

Know if you really did.

[C]

I don't think I ever cleaned out that locker I had.

[A]

Katie's possessions are now the subject of a Storage wars episode.

[C]

I. Oh, that's cool. That's how that happens.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Wait, so they shut it all down?

[A]

Yeah, they moved not far from here.

[C]

Where they have to pretend you can see the outside.

[A]

Katie Nolan's possessions, though, will they be CGI replicated? Yeah, on the new virtual set.

[B]

What did you have in your locker? Nunchucks?

[C]

Do not remember. This has happened.

[B]

Did you have a cutout picture of Mario Lopez on the inside of your locker door?

[C]

And I, shirtless, give it a smooch. Every day.

[B]

I feel like you had something super shady in your eye. Yeah.

[A]

Why did you just.

[C]

I was remembering. I was having a memory. Okay. I was thinking back to my time when we worked there. It was the building where I found out that Pablo was having a baby. He, like, ran out of work and was like, I need you to do High Noon. Goodbye. I'm having a baby right now.

[A]

That's a fact. That is a factual.

[C]

And I was like, I don't. I don't.

[A]

You did break out into song.

[C]

I did.

[B]

And you remember Ben Affleck just ripping cigs.

[C]

That's the other one. That is exactly what I was thinking of is how my lock. I was right next to when Ben Affleck came in and ripped cigs in the ESPN office.

[B]

Boston women immediately, their second thought is either Matt Damon or Ben Affleck. It just immediately is like the pheromone.

[C]

He's always right here.

[B]

He's right here. He's right at the tip of your head.

[C]

We're thinking of you, Ben.

[B]

Yeah, but he was just.

[C]

Oh, I forgot to put my contacts in. In the Uber.

[B]

Smoking cigarettes. Now you're flying blind.

[C]

I can't see anything. Do I look okay?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Should I put the sunglasses back on? Every clip I see of a woman going viral, now she's got sunglasses on.

[A]

Outside of your elbows being racially profiled, everything looks totally normal.

[C]

God, why do I. How do I get rid of this? What, do I dip them in ash?

[A]

They're trying to deport your Elbows.

[B]

They wouldn't tell us at Sirius there was a celebrity coming in and they were like, you have to go the back way out of the thing. And, you know, immediately on the show we're like, we work here every day. Why do we have to go a different way? And they're like, no, you have to leave through the back door. You have to go like the long way and leave through the elevator bank on the backside. And we're like, who is coming? And they're like, we can't tell you. It was Madonna. That was it.

[C]

I mean, that was. It is crazy.

[B]

I don't know.

[C]

She's Madonna.

[B]

Listen.

[A]

Yeah, I'm gonna go with Katie on this.

[C]

I know that she did.

[A]

Protocol feels appropriate.

[C]

Is it because she didn't she show up at the Cellar or something? She tried stand up comedy.

[B]

So I. I stand up at the.

[C]

She has dropped, but she is still Madonna.

[B]

She's done it more than once.

[A]

Wait, wait, wait, wait. I didn't know that.

[B]

She's done it twice. She's done stand up at the Comedy Cellar. I haven't been there for either. I was there the first time and. And didn't watch because. Why would I. Actually, I don't know. I did try. I'm not going to lie. I tried to get the video from Liz, but Liz.

[A]

I was going to say.

[B]

I love Liz and Liz is, you know, she's a real one to her job. And she's like, I'm not going to give you Madonna's set.

[C]

Come on.

[A]

Madonna's set.

[C]

Come on. I want to film it if we.

[B]

Can, because I heard the second one. She bombed for 30.

[C]

First of all. No, I was going to say.

[A]

Right, wait, she was there for 30 minutes.

[B]

Yeah, that's also.

[C]

That's ego. She can't tell her. She can have.

[A]

I was going to say that's. That's in the category of. We don't typically let random pop stars.

[C]

Ben Affleck smoking in the building.

[A]

We don't.

[C]

The Cellar especially is like a. You have to get past to get up on stage there.

[B]

Yeah, but it's the way.

[C]

But you're not going to say Madonna. Sorry. No. Try the stand.

[B]

But to her, it's just like a thing. It's. To her it's just like.

[C]

I know.

[B]

Oh, it's just a room. Oh, it's a comedy club. I don't care. She didn't give a. She was like, I just want to do this. I want to scratch this itch. And then she did it. And then the Thing that I heard was that when she was like, wasn't doing well, she was doing the thing where she was going, you guys hate me. And they go, yeah, no, we love you. And then she just bomb again. And then she.

[C]

You guys are mad at me, which.

[B]

So I've adopted that. So if you see me, I love that. If a joke does not hit, I.

[C]

Go, dan soda.com for tickets, I go.

[B]

Oh, you guys are mad at me.

[A]

On tour, you can see Dan Golden.

[B]

Retriever tour kicking off in September.

[C]

Let's go unveiling. Sorry to wave my elbow at you.

[B]

No, do it, dude. I love it. I'm a wrestling fan. You're not upsetting me. I watch people in bronzer every Monday.

[C]

Saying the tour thing.

[B]

No, it's just dancer.com and Madonna might.

[A]

Be opening and Dan might be unveiling his. You guys are the baby voice.

[B]

Are you guys. Do you guys hate me? Just bombing and saying that?

[C]

It's pretty cool, man. Somebody's got to try it.

[B]

Pretty good way out.

[C]

Somebody has to try it.

[A]

How? How often does it happen where someone shows up being like, I famous person feel like I should be able to try my hand at this and you should enjoy it.

[B]

Rarely, if ever. I think it's like, Madonna is obviously Madonna. Even though I tried to act like they kicked his ass. Ears for Madonna.

[C]

And it was only Madonna because I.

[B]

Thought it was gonna be Prince. Oh, I thought that's who it was the whole time.

[C]

Oh, because you got hyped on it being somebody and then you're like, yeah.

[B]

And I was upset that it was Madonna.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

But no, the seller doesn't like celebrities. Just go do stand up. I think that was like, a unique case.

[A]

I like Madonna just doing, like, observational comedy.

[B]

She's like, what's the deal with. Why do I have cones on my breasts? My breasts aren't cones. You go, Madonna. That's brilliant. Someone has that style already.

[C]

That's already. You're not going to believe this. Someone does that.

[B]

What's the deal with sex books? I put one out in the 90s. I don't even know. That's not even a joke.

[A]

These are good books.

[B]

Wild.

[A]

Wait, her book?

[C]

Her sex book that she got in trouble for.

[A]

Hold on, I gotta. This is. This is something that I'm unfortunately not as familiar with. Oh, it's titled Sex.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

I believe it's called Sexbook.

[B]

It's called Sexbook. Look it up.

[A]

I think I just acquired a PDF of it.

[C]

Good free.

[B]

Might be pixelated.

[A]

I think I'm pirating Madonna's sex book.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

I'll teach you how to.

[C]

You don't read it out loud. I don't know.

[A]

Maybe I was going to say, is this Madonna's sex book? And page eight is.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Is that Madonna's nipple?

[A]

That's Madonna, right?

[B]

Oh, yeah, absolutely.

[A]

Okay. I mean, she gets blindfolded.

[B]

Is it a blindfold?

[C]

Yeah, it is.

[B]

Back when people were still actively using Pablo.

[C]

Thanks. He's circling her nipple with his cursor. Like, I don't see it. And this you'll see right here. This is a nipple.

[A]

This is not. This is not something that she wanted to know that I was doing. No, you could say sounds worse than it.

[C]

You could save the tab.

[B]

This isn't a snuff film. This is a book that was released. Yeah, you can buy this.

[A]

Black and white and very tasteful.

[B]

Yeah, it's. That was the thing. They were like, oh, it's a. It's art. Get over it. Get over it. Squares. So what? I'm sucking my finger, looking at my nipple.

[C]

Whatever.

[B]

That was like, a big deal, though. I was obviously hitting puberty around the time that thing was coming out.

[C]

Obviously. Yeah. So it was, like, formative.

[B]

So. So I made it look like, what is this the book?

[C]

What Does Sex Mean Now?

[B]

I got to go back to the bathroom.

[C]

I'm peeing a lot. Peeing a lot. And it's taking a long time.

[B]

I drink a lot of water. Hydration is very important to me at 12 years old.

[A]

I'm currently reading the New York Times review.

[C]

Oh, what they give it.

[A]

The title is the Empress has no Clothes. So I'm guessing this is going to lean a bit negative.

[C]

Oh, now that, kids, is called context Clues. What Pablo's doing there would be taught in a class called reading comprehension.

[B]

Do they do that anymore?

[C]

I don't think it doesn't appear that way.

[A]

At least here's the kicker. Some people think Madonna never did have talent or humor or appeal. But I am not one of them.

[C]

Okay, that's a weird way to say that.

[B]

Has you ever seen her at the Cellar? O. Oh, my God.

[A]

She always had a witty edge to her act that suggested she was not taking herself too seriously. Maybe sex can be a warning about what happens when pop icons become bloated one way or another. Think of Elvis in Las Vegas and you'll have an idea of where Madonna is heading if she doesn't watch out. Period 1992, page seven of the national edition of the New York Times.

[C]

Whoa.

[A]

So, okay. You know, Yeah, I do appreciate, though, the. The. The amount of. The amount of nipple.

[C]

You're still looking at it while we sit here looking at you. This is 130. You invited us here to watch you look at Madonna.

[B]

Just him go like this. Okay.

[C]

Okay, I am. And. Oh, I got a lip. A lower lip.

[B]

Anyways, Dan, how are the giants doing? Whoa, 86 tab that. We'll re. Tab that one. Anyways, Katie, what's up with your orange elbows?

[C]

Double click.

[B]

Oh, all right. All right. Gonna do some light reading after the show.

[A]

You guys pin any tabs on your browser?

[C]

I have a bunch pinned. And then once there, that bookmarks tab on my browser is full. That I like the ones I can see.

[A]

You'll go to, like, tiny dots level. Like.

[C]

Yeah, I usually just keep tabs open. I have to keep deleting tabs on my phone because I'm at 500 for the browsing group.

[B]

No way.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

No.

[C]

And I'll go back through them, and then I'll go like, I do still want to read that article. Not right now, but later.

[B]

500?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Your phone must be extraordinarily slow.

[B]

No, if you go back 500. If you go to, like, post.

[A]

Let's break this thing out.

[B]

If you go to post, like, 50.

[A]

How long ago is it now we're podcasting.

[B]

Is it like 2021? You are a tab hoarder.

[C]

Yes, I've. I've.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[C]

No.

[B]

Time to do this is like going into your house and seeing a bunch of magazine stacks.

[C]

This is from when we moved into the apartment.

[B]

Great. So a couple years ago. Two years ago. Yeah, two and a half years ago.

[C]

I have a tab for custom neon sign because I was gonna make us one that said Sky Palace.

[B]

Love it.

[C]

Hang it up in there.

[B]

I do love that Sky Palace.

[A]

You guys do have a Sky Palace.

[C]

That's what we call it.

[A]

I assume that's. That's why you called it that.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Reference to something else.

[C]

Yeah, it's because it's a sk.

[B]

Then we get high and get scared that we're up high.

[C]

Then I have an Atlantic article called Pixar's Talking Blobs are becoming more and more unsatisfying.

[B]

All right, someone hating on Pixar. Don't love to see that.

[C]

This is in 2023. June of 2023. The fantastical world of elemental masks, a lack of imagination.

[A]

Were you meaning to get back to that at some point?

[C]

Yeah, I still am. That's why it's There you want to go dig through. Good headline. I do want that. Just not. I don't have a reason to need it now. And then later I'll try to remember that it exists. Won't be able to find it, and we'll be frustrated. This isn't advice on how to live your life. It's me showing my mental illness to you.

[B]

Do you feel like any urge when you see that? You go, I don't need to know that now. This was.

[C]

If I do, I delete it.

[B]

Yeah. So that.

[C]

Yeah, I don't feel that on that. I would still, like I was gonna.

[B]

Say for the audience, still need to know about this.

[A]

Katie has kept that tab.

[C]

Yes. And I'm keeping it. Choosing again right now to keep it.

[B]

I just want to let everyone know I'm currently 42 years old. That was when I was still in my 30s.

[C]

Crazy.

[B]

That tab was when I was still in my 30s.

[C]

And while we're doing this, I just want everyone to know I still in my 30s.

[A]

Was Jeffrey Epstein the live when that tab was open.

[B]

I don't know what you're talking about, dude. He did nothing wrong. Can we move forward?

[C]

We don't even have a list. Why do you guys keep bringing up a list?

[B]

Oh, my God. You guys are obsessed with J. Oh, my God. Big J, Big app.

[A]

It's very normal to have footage in one minute.

[C]

The reason I want that Pixar thing is because as we plunge towards our AI Slop future, I have imagined that, like, it would be very easy sooner to AI generate an entire Pixar movie than to, like, AI generate one that is supposed to look like it's really people.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And I just feel like. I don't know, feel like there's something there. We gotta look closer.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

So I'm gonna keep it ourselves.

[B]

Gonna save some evidence. I keep thinking about how AI now, we always thought it was gonna be like, computer. It might get there, like, computers talking and being, like, aware of their existence. But we've just reached the stage where it's like, where they do the side panels on porn websites, where it's like, Peter having sex with Lois. Like, that's just where we're at with AI. We're like, I don't want to watch Homer bang Marge. I want to, like, recreate my dead father so I can have a conversation with him. I don't want to do that.

[A]

I was going to ask you about this, actually in the realm of, like, one of your great gifts, Dan, which is like, are you worried that AI is going to get good at impression.

[B]

They already are. It's like, impressive. It's like crazy. They do, like. And I. And I eat some of the slop. I'm acting like I don't eat slop.

[A]

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

[C]

What slop?

[A]

Are you. What. What are you.

[B]

Hank Hill. Hank Hill Trap rapping. I don't know if you've seen that. I don't know if you've seen Hank Hill busting it out. Dude, Katie's fishing through 200 tabs. Yeah.

[A]

@ the moment.

[B]

Oh, I can find that tab.

[A]

Oh, yeah. No.

[B]

In about two seconds. But I don't know.

[A]

I don't know. This. I don't know. Wait, this is trap. King of the hill.

[B]

Yeah. It just cracks me up and.

[A]

Oh, wait, this is Okay. I. I went after this. That I do want to play for you guys, but this is awesome.

[C]

This is having a slop off.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

I'm over here sharing Atlantic articles. Check out my slop.

[A]

It's July.

[B]

It is July. You need slop. But the. They're doing, like, full songs, and I didn't know that. They did, like, kind of cut a full album with Hank Hill, and I'm like, all right, well, this is too much.

[A]

I told all the ops to eat and get cancer too. Bobby got that cell phone stick. You better answer, dude. My wife's got a body on that. Is she a dancer too? This big Hank, they talking about the money sprint. I cannot hold it. It's a large amount. I need. I need AI Boom Howard to ad lib over this.

[B]

So they got the whole album. You guys peep the album. I love it. I know it's gross, but that's.

[A]

That's. That's. That's. I'm gonna.

[C]

Yeah, they're already good at allow ourselves to do little. Like. Okay, that was stupid. It's so, like, if I slow down and I watch one video of AI cutting glass fruit, you lost just one.

[A]

Oh, God.

[C]

You're. You're the one.

[B]

She loves it. It scratches her itch.

[C]

The what about it? It's the sound the knife makes as it cuts through the glass fruit. It's the fact that my brain goes. That doesn't. It doesn't matter.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

As soon as it starts to go. You couldn't possibly. It goes, shh.

[B]

There's a reason. Listen. All of this is coming to fruition. This was MK Ultra, and it's all coming to fruition now. Where they're finding ways to scratch our brains like dogs. Y scratches. A certain thing because it's exactly what's happening.

[C]

Everything feels bad. So we're all just going, can I feel good for a second?

[B]

But, like, Katie hates asmr, but that is kind of a form of asmr. Because you're hearing.

[C]

Who said that?

[B]

I thought you didn't like asmr.

[C]

It doesn't do for me what it does for the people. It does it for.

[A]

Sorry.

[B]

They found a way.

[A]

AI knife cutting glass.

[C]

Yeah, those are asm. Those are asm.

[B]

But they found a way. That's what I'm saying. They, like, found a way to where you go, I don't need that scratched. And you go, except if you scratch it like that. Exactly what I want.

[C]

That is nice. I do like that. But you got it. You have to go and done.

[A]

Foot is tapping on the ground rapidly as you're watching.

[C]

And now we're done with. And then you got to shut the door.

[B]

And I love videos of guys with dreads. Like, big dreads.

[C]

We were talking about AI getting there.

[B]

I know, but I'm talking about scratching that.

[A]

You're talking. That's. That's. Again, that's in the Dr. Pimple Popper coaching.

[C]

Yes. Yes, that's right.

[B]

That's exactly.

[C]

Everybody's got their pimple dread shape. Whatever makes you feel relief when it.

[B]

Happens to, like, people with a ton of hair. And then they cut it and they're like, oh, look at all that. That water hitting their scalp.

[C]

So this is like. Like washing a dog. Yeah.

[A]

This is the. The AI.

[C]

This could be anything.

[A]

This is Homer Simpson.

[B]

Yeah. Banging.

[C]

This is.

[B]

This is.

[A]

This is him romancing Marge by performing at a concert that is populated by AI generated cartoon characters. But this is Homer singing.

[C]

So elaborate.

[A]

Starlight by Muse.

[C]

Beautiful. Homer's got a lovely voice. Shrek is into it.

[B]

Big muse guy. Also, Shrek loves mews, too.

[C]

Shrek loves mews.

[B]

He'll come out of the forest for it.

[A]

In other words, Dan, you are not worried. You are mostly kind of.

[B]

It's inevitable. What am I going through?

[C]

I also think, if I may, my favorite thing about your ability to do voices isn't just that you do voices. It's that you then apply it to make whatever joke you've made funnier.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

It's always been my issue with people that do voices that everyone's like, oh, you're offended. Like, no, it just didn't serve the joke. It was the joke itself, was you doing the voice, whereas I'd rather you use the voice to tell a joke. And Dan does that. Let me finish complimenting you. AI is a real. Will never be. I think the last thing AI is going to be good at is humor. I don't think AI is funny.

[A]

Oh, I agree. I agree with that.

[C]

It's, like, too hard for it to get. It tries too hard in a way that you're like. You don't.

[A]

Because humor is fundamentally social. Implicit context clues.

[C]

Right.

[A]

And that's like the. The deepest layer.

[C]

That's so true.

[A]

Is that.

[C]

That's so true.

[B]

Humans, we're very emotional. We're like the most emotional animal ever. So I don't think AI will be able to replicate that because, like, especially with music. When you hear AI music now, you're like, it is. It misses something.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

It misses, like, soul to it.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

There's no. Like, you. You can. They can make it sound pleasing or whatever. And I know mute. With music especially, you can trick it by, like, the counts and stuff that you're like. It is somewhat mathematical, but I just think AI will never be able to replicate, like, the human soul if you.

[C]

Read something written by ChatGPT or, like, what's the Twitter one? Grok.

[A]

So we're speaking, by the way, smarmy humor. Grok at this moment has been, like, actually deactivated.

[C]

He's going, oh, he's. They're off. They turned it off.

[A]

People are trying to ask Grok, and Grok is not responding.

[B]

Grok's going to be the first Netflix doc about AI where he was like, I was mistreated. If Elon ever sells off Grok and someone else buys. Buys it, they do the Netflix doc where they were like, were you abused? He told me to be liberal, then conservative, and then liberal again.

[A]

Grok is being managed like a boy band right now.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Elon's his Lou Perlman. I think the problem with humans is we're starting to give, like, kids ozampic and. And we're, like, losing our funny and lonely kids. Like, doing voices was a thing out of pure loneliness. Just like being funny for myself. And then fat kids. You need fat kids. We need.

[A]

Right, right. AI Macho man doesn't have the trauma.

[B]

That, no, he's gotta be alone learning how to cut promos on his roommate because, you know, AI didn't have to clean a sink full of dishes and get mad about it.

[C]

Here's a question. I was thinking about this yesterday. Sometimes I, in this current climate, hesitate to say something. I think, because someone's going to ascribe me a political party and then say that that's what I. And so I. But what political party is this? If I feel like in terms of wealth, if you reach a certain amount, like, let's say however much Peter Thiel has, has. We should be able to find you. When you say in an interview something along the lines of, I don't know if humanity should exist forever and continue.

[A]

You would prefer the human race to endure. Right. You're hesitating. Well, I. Yes. I don't know.

[B]

I. I would.

[C]

I would.

[A]

This is a long hesitation. There's so many questions. And plus, should the human race survive.

[C]

We should be able to fine you the way that the NBA would find a player. When they disparage the refs.

[B]

Oh, when they go like that call is bull.

[C]

And then they go like, you gotta give us $25,000.

[B]

You can't do that.

[C]

It undermines the game.

[B]

Peter Thiel would feel like you're trying to wipe out humanity. You gotta give us a billion.

[A]

Should be replay review.

[C]

Yes. And we should go watch. Show that. First of all, stop doing interviews. That guy can't. So.

[A]

So this video, comfortably. This video. KD's description is not in any way an exaggeration.

[B]

No. He goes, do you think humanity should. The guy asks it pretty well. And then he just.

[C]

And he's like. It's sounding like you're heading.

[A]

This is Ross Duthat who's like the New York Times conservative columnist who's just like. Kind of like putting a question on a T. Yeah.

[B]

And hey, humans, Are you still like humans?

[C]

Right?

[B]

And he goes, no, Peter.

[A]

Peter Thiel. Just like Nomar Garcia para ing. Just like.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Like verbal.

[C]

Verbal.

[A]

You know, wristband adjustment for 30 seconds.

[C]

It's the way every interview I see of this guy. He's wet in a wrong way. Something is moist that isn't in its. And it's wrong. And he's like, breathing funny. And he takes these long pauses that, like, I'm trying to teach myself to slow down and allow some silence. He is the worst case. You leave so much silence. And then he does the like. Well, and I. And I. And he seems so nervous that you're like.

[A]

It's a lot of buffering, a lot of physical buffering.

[B]

I don't like somebody.

[C]

I know you're full of boy blood, but I don't like somebody that nervous.

[A]

Alleged blood.

[C]

Boys that nervous to have that NER that much money and to be running our upcoming human experiments known as the. Whatever Olympics that he's doing.

[B]

Oh, he's doing the Games.

[A]

Funding the roid Olympics.

[C]

And he's so nervous.

[B]

I think he goes back to the spaceship and they go like, what were you doing out there? We put you in the human body for once and you screwed it up. The water goes on the inside and he goes like, why? I don't know. I was stressed out. They asked me about humans.

[C]

I was.

[B]

You want me to tell them that they're supposed to live?

[C]

Ross Douthat is a very skilled interviewer.

[B]

Oh, come on. We set it up.

[A]

We knew it was a gotcha question.

[B]

The liberals go too much off emotion. The conservatives off just stuff.

[C]

Peter Thiel. Peter Thiel needs a Jordan.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

To jump in.

[A]

He needs to be mommaged.

[C]

We're not talking about that. He needs to be mommaged so badly.

[B]

Yeah. Just go get a. You know, I don't know.

[C]

Dude, just. What are you doing? You make me so uncomfortable. I'm sorry.

[A]

I want Peter Thiel to have it. Have a Jordan Hudson.

[C]

It's just a way.

[A]

It really would help.

[B]

We don't talk about that. I mean, he could afford one. He could afford like the biggest king out there. Just pay a lady like, you know, 100 million.

[C]

The biggest king.

[B]

Yeah. Just to go like man or woman.

[A]

Just to go non derogatory.

[B]

Non derogatory. We're just going like, hey, we're not talking about that. I'll do it. Hey. He doesn't answer questions about humans. You stupid. And then Peter goes, thank your dad. And I go, you're welcome. I'll be eating my crack when he throws a treat.

[A]

It does feel like, by the way.

[B]

I'm buying a compound on New Zealand because this thing's about to get fried.

[A]

Peter Thiel does have men in black.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Cockroach guy.

[C]

What's his deal?

[B]

He's got any sugar?

[C]

What's his deal?

[B]

More.

[C]

Oh, yeah. As I'm saying that. Should I. He's gay, right? I didn't mean to say. He needs a short on.

[B]

And that's the reason he needs to.

[A]

Yeah, that's the part that he'll be offended.

[C]

I didn't mean to. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that. I forgot for a second that that's.

[B]

The reason he shut down Gawker.

[C]

Yeah, that's the whole thing.

[B]

He funded Hogan.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

What you gonna do when I get funded by a billionaire?

[C]

I just think we should be able to say you have to pay us money. You can't do that.

[B]

I'm gonna go, ooh, why you wet? That's what I'm sorry, what's this? You dewy ass. Shut your dewy ass up. He's like, I need more sugar.

[C]

Wish we had like a cool villain. All the villains we got are like.

[B]

Yeah, Bond villains were cool.

[C]

No taste, no style, no.

[B]

Where is the volcano with the opening platform?

[A]

So I think I have an answer.

[C]

Was like, what is this?

[A]

So the be.

[B]

It was a bond building gray carpet.

[A]

Hold on, hold on, hold on. Forest or whatever the Bezos wedding would have been villain wedding. If it was like on an inaccessible.

[B]

Island, that's what they should have done.

[A]

It was. Instead, it was an Italian Times Square.

[B]

Should have been on like Dead Man's Island.

[A]

Skull Island.

[C]

Wasn't it right off of Venice? Like, it's not. It wasn't on the main Venice.

[A]

No. They were all staying in hotels in Venice. And then there was like a thing that was slightly more removed, but it was very photographable. I think the people who are doing the. The villain stuff that you guys are describing, I. So this is. I will anonymize this story because legal reasons, but I was just talking to somebody who inadvertently wound up on a boat that he claims involved another boat following it. And that boat was full of. And this is. Again, this is not something I've reported. Just a story I was just told was full of prostitutes. And it like docked inside the bigger boat.

[B]

Boat. Okay. And a little. Little preview of things to come. And.

[A]

And it went to a Caribbean island. And the owner of the boat was revealed to be. I think this is general enough for me to say a Russian billionaire who also owns a very prominent soccer team.

[B]

No way.

[A]

So I'm like, when I heard that story.

[B]

This was guys live in Jeep two days ago. Guys live in Grand Theft Auto. In real life, whole boat of hookers into bigger boat. And then we do hooker Island. Like, that's the party you want to go to. Not Bezos, where they're all giving.

[A]

Like, that's all we're asking. Like, why can't. Why can't American billionaires.

[B]

He's like, but I'll tell you what. I know we've been on the boy. I know we've been on old Peter Thiel. But this steroid Olympics people are gonna die. Well, we're reaching the part of society where that will Running man is like, there's a new one coming out which doesn't look that good. There is Glenn Jacobs as Arnold's role.

[C]

In Glenn Jacobs or what's the name?

[B]

No, who's the guy that was in.

[A]

Oh, Glenn Powell.

[B]

Glen Powell.

[A]

Who's in everything.

[C]

Glenn Jacobs. I do recognize that name. Who is that? Was that my old boss at espn? I think it is.

[A]

I think so.

[C]

Glenn Jacobs was there for the espn.

[A]

Was recently named vice president of production for mma.

[B]

I just shout out Glenn Jacobs.

[C]

He was my first boss at ESPN before they moved him around and reorged and reorged and reorged and then I think laid him off.

[B]

Is that Kane's name from wwe?

[C]

Maybe.

[B]

Can you check if that's Kane from.

[A]

Now the mayor of Glenn Thomas Jacobs, also known by his ring name Kane.

[B]

Son of a. That's Kane. I wish you could hit the red effects.

[A]

Did he do that? When in 2018 he became the mayor of Knox County, Tennessee.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Damn. Knox county feels like a popular county in Tennessee. I feel like I've. Could that be where Knoxville is?

[A]

Katy, Its county seat is Knoxville Back.

[B]

To this steroid Olympics.

[C]

You're excited for it.

[B]

It's just. No, I'm not. I feel the same way about it as I do about a Paul brother boxing. I get the gist if it hits me on the right Saturday. Yeah.

[C]

Someone's gonna die. I just think they're gonna. Are they gonna put too much stuff in? They're gonna.

[A]

Their heart's gonna be like Jack dog that looks like it can't walk.

[B]

Yeah. When you get those pit bulls that.

[C]

You'Re like, it's kangaroos too. Giant.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I think they want to compete, so I think they're going to be pushing their. Whatever sport they're doing. Yeah. Could end up in death, but I don't think they're going to be like. Do you think they're going to be like hot dog balls of.

[C]

I don't know. I think they're going to try. They're. The way they're marketing it now and it has changed over the years since they've had this idea. But the current angle they're taking, which seems to be working, is that they want to test the limits of human like capability. And so they're like, you're holding us back by saying we can't use these drugs to enhance our bodies to achieve more so.

[A]

So in fact unite some. Some, some. Some stray threads we've been dangling here. The idea is the brainchild of Dr. Aaron D', Souza, the Australian lawyer who helped mastermind Thiel's proxy war against news media organization Gawker, which led to gawker's bankruptcy in 2016. Furthermore, in a recent interview with the Independent, D' Souza was defiant and outlined how he Hoped the Enhanced Games would not only shake up the world of sport, but provide a public platform for life. Extending science to thrive. Quote, this is the route towards eternal life.

[B]

Yes. Yes. Said that's never gone wrong. Anyone that's ever sought that out has never. Nothing bad has ever happened.

[C]

I.

[B]

Only good can come from this.

[C]

Can't relate to the desire to want to live forever.

[B]

Well, my love, that's because you have depression.

[C]

Many people are out here going this, but always Katie, not me. I'm going. How much longer do we have to do this?

[B]

What is left on the clock?

[C]

When do I get to go to sleep?

[A]

I will say your Internet search history suggests that you plan on living forever.

[C]

Well, let me go back, because we really did only get to one article there, and there's a lot.

[B]

What if I told you you could live forever?

[C]

How to reheat chicken parm. Always important. How does I want to do that? Wrong.

[B]

I'm going to step in as your, you know, your future husband and tell you to keep that tab.

[C]

I do.

[B]

That's okay.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Wait, what's. What's.

[C]

I'm thinking of you all.

[B]

I saw you go to that X.

[A]

What's the strategy next to it?

[C]

Ronnie Lott signature. It was your birthday.

[A]

I was gonna say either you're the greatest safety, you were trying to steal Ronnie Lot's identity, or getting Dan a great birthday gift.

[B]

Yep.

[C]

Which is it?

[A]

What. What. What's wrong with normal chicken parm reheating?

[C]

With chicken parm, you have the chicken.

[A]

It's real teal.

[C]

Like, you have the chicken that, you know, a microwave heats from the inside out. So that's something to keep in mind. So you have the chicken that you. You have the breading that you need to get crispy. That could get soggy pretty easily. You don't want that. And then you have cheese that you don't want. I don't. Are we having a contest of how to do it? I can click on the tab and tell you what it's like.

[A]

As someone who often reheats chicken parm. Now I'm like, this is a bit of news I can use.

[B]

Yeah. We gotta find out what you want.

[C]

You want everything to be reheated in a way that makes the best place to heat up the dish is in the oven. The dry heat will make sure the breaded chicken has a perfectly crisp texture and that your pasta doesn't get too soft. Oh, well, this is assuming you have pasta in there, too. I would do that separately, so that's crazy.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I don't know. Maybe this is a bad length, too. Instant pots. I don't know what that is. I don't know what an instant pot is.

[A]

This is a choose your own adventure stovetop.

[C]

It tells you how to do it in all the different ways to do it in a skillet, if you want. Basically, yes. Choose your own adventure.

[B]

I know we were talking about your locker earlier at espn, but this does feel like the end of the school year. Cleaning out your locker and being like, oh, I found this. I was supposed to turn this assignment in and I didn't. That's what it feels like.

[C]

The New Yorker 100 the Case Against Travel by Agnes Callard. It turns us into the worst version of ourselves while convincing us that we're at our best.

[B]

Huh. Interesting. Save that.

[C]

And as a lady who likes to sit, I was like, I love when somebody advocates loudly for just sitting.

[B]

Back to the roid Olympics. Do they have a date? Do they have, like, any.

[A]

So it's gonna happen next summer in Vegas.

[C]

And it's, I think, next or October.

[B]

Of course it's Vegas.

[A]

Something's telling me October, but May 2026, the enhanced games. And it is in Las Vegas.

[B]

And is it like track and field?

[A]

They are scheduled to include track and field, swimming, weightlifting, gymnastics.

[B]

That's going to be crazy.

[A]

Combat sports.

[B]

Combat sports is the dangerous. But, man, I'm not going to be able to turn away.

[C]

I know.

[A]

I mean, admittedly, we've been like, dangerous. We've been talking about this on our show a lot. Like, should we. In terms of, like, should we do this on our show? And at every turn, I'm just kind of like, again, I kind of get it. But now. Now that I hear about this eternal.

[B]

Life thing, I'm like, it's so funny that that's. It's like, not a good commercial for that. Where they go. And we think it's a good commercial for eternal life. You should go. Just start with extending it. Start with extending it.

[C]

If it's you and me and we're still around, I would live with you forever. But, like, if I. If anything happens to you and then I. They figure out eternal life. And I'm like, well, now.

[B]

Yeah, guys, we already covered this. It's called Dracula.

[C]

Yeah. Damn.

[B]

Guys, we've already an Rice and Bram Stoker have covered this topic.

[A]

Can I tell you guys about one tab that I've been meaning to show both of you?

[C]

Yeah. Unless it's the sex book again. Pablo, I know what a nipple looks like.

[A]

Yeah, I've minimized that.

[C]

I have three of them.

[B]

Some of us were there when the book came out. Okay.

[A]

The thing I wanted to show you actually is this and drive the up there or you're gonna get booted the out of here. Have you guys seen this? Dan, have you seen this up? I promise you that.

[B]

Hurry up. Pretty tough.

[A]

We're on a golf course.

[B]

He's not.

[A]

Not that he's not.

[B]

They sound Canadian.

[A]

This is Canada tough. You're not tough. You're not tough. Let's get going. Get going. Smaller guy in like a very loud Dan flashes shirt. This is not sunglasses shorts. Minutes can't even.

[B]

This is golf.

[A]

This is golf now he's teamed up man. That's fine.

[B]

He's not teeing it up. He's standing. God. They're Canadian police out here.

[A]

No, we don't need police.

[B]

We're not.

[A]

Okay then let's get.

[B]

You need me to go get a guy body. Get going. This is not fun. I'm going to throw in this guys just casually lining up a shot.

[A]

No you little blue sky.

[C]

This is guy doesn't know how to film the action.

[B]

They're still mad.

[A]

23 minutes.

[B]

That is crazy.

[A]

So that's the dispute at the court.

[C]

Of this.

[A]

In this short guy is with the with the shirt. The loud shirt and the glove and the shorts.

[B]

I love a guy hitting a cry about it.

[C]

I bought it.

[A]

And he has the high ground.

[B]

Oh, glasses are off. Still got the golf club. Golf head. Nice. Take the glove off.

[A]

Gloveless. He's de gloved. No you. You.

[B]

He's a golf course. Pack up.

[A]

Go now.

[C]

Cameraman's on whose side?

[A]

Hard to tell so far.

[B]

This guy clapping like this guy's doing a haka dance. Yeah.

[A]

Come on, man.

[B]

Hey, is he going like in the water? Yeah. Splish flash. Taking a bath. Told you.

[A]

You want another?

[B]

Oh, he's coming out of the water. Swamp thing all swap thing. Boop him. Boop. He's a big boy too. Stop guy. Oh my God. Oh, he's saying bang.

[A]

He's saying bang.

[C]

Enough.

[B]

Dude. This guy is just like no, you know what?

[C]

God. He won't stop.

[B]

That's a big brother talk. Out of here. Please get up.

[C]

I'm not. My shirts are falling off.

[A]

Looking like an idiot.

[B]

Smashing someone's face and saying bang is.

[A]

Objective just Mike breening him as you're.

[C]

You have to reveal that we that who they are.

[A]

So when you said this is going to live forever. The guy who is the like he's not the aggressor actually. But he is the guy.

[C]

Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang.

[A]

Banging that guy's face. I texted a phone number we acquired for him because we identified him and the Internet has now identified him as a gentleman by the name of Nick Tarnaski.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Who you may vaguely recall from his previous life as NHL enforcer. I mean, he played for the Tampa Bay Lightning, National Predators and Florida Panthers. According to data from hockeyfights.com, his professional fight record.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Totals 167 fights, which explains the.

[C]

I tried to tell you to shut up energy, like I warned you.

[B]

Also makes the guy. When he's going, woo, woo. You're like, buddy, you have no idea what the tree you're barking up right now is. Absolutely.

[C]

You have to listen to me. You do not want this.

[B]

That's the coolest moment where he goes, I'm trying to give you my Liam Neeson.

[C]

Please, please, please, please.

[B]

I have acquired a certain amount of CTE in the NHL I'm about to unleash.

[C]

Once I start, it's not gonna stop.

[B]

I'm gonna come down that hill. I will put you in the swamp. You will come back out. I will say bang. Bang.

[A]

Bang.

[B]

I like that he's called Bang.

[A]

And also the technique.

[B]

He's like Emeril Lagasse. He's like, bang. Boom. We're gonna make this spicy. Yeah, that's the coolest. If I could fight, I would absolutely be saying bang. As I rang a dude's bell.

[C]

I'd sound out of breath, embarrassed. I'd be like, bang.

[B]

Please, someone.

[C]

Bang. Bang.

[B]

This is a lot of activity. I want you to ring my bell. Ring my bell. Bang. Bang. I'd be singing that if I were Steel Roof Rusty. That is a. That's his nickname.

[C]

Tin Tin T. Roof Rusty.

[B]

That is great.

[A]

Really good.

[C]

Thanks. My dad loves the B52s. My dad loves the B52s. To the point where they said they were going on their.

[B]

They shared it.

[C]

Their goodbye tour or whatever.

[B]

They did the share thing and then they.

[C]

And then they're back now. And you're like, my dad.

[A]

They open for share.

[C]

All that money to go.

[B]

Oh, no. I was saying Cher does that. Cher, like, back in the day would.

[A]

Go like, I'm retiring.

[B]

Good luck finding me.

[C]

How dare you?

[A]

That shares tight 30, isn't it more.

[B]

Down her we're used to. She's like, I'm back. And then it was like, you said you were gone. She's like, how long? Anyways, Shout out Fresno.

[C]

Were we supposed to Talk about your hair at some point.

[B]

Don't cut it. I'm in the Don't Cut camp.

[A]

I do think that if I wore like a. Like a Three Ninjas headband, it would look cool.

[B]

Man. Three Ninjas really had us out here thinking we could beat up grown men.

[A]

Tum Tum vibes.

[C]

Yeah. Tum Tum. I had a crush on one of them. Which ninja did I have a crush on?

[B]

Cole. Absolutely. Colt, you wouldn't go Rocky. I know you. Rocky was the alpha. Colt was the second best.

[C]

Thank you.

[B]

It's the J.C. chasse thing.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. You would have liked Colt. And I would say if anybody. I would be Colt.

[A]

Right? No, it's the NSync. The home improvement. The three ninjas like you have a Goldilocks zone of handsome voice.

[B]

Everyone wants jtt. Obviously. Everyone wants Rocket.

[C]

I had a. A photo of Apollo. Anton Ono hanging up in my bedroom.

[B]

Shout out the soul patch. But Three Ninjas really had a generation of little boys believing with a small amount of mini mall taekwondo we could beat up grown men that are criminals.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

I hope no one ever tested them.

[A]

Help hardened FBI agents in their investigations.

[B]

Yeah. Their father was an FBI agent.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

You would think that like the Bang Bang Bang video we watched. Like a grown men watches a kid going to a karate stance and he goes, you don't want to do this, kid. I'm a man. You're a little boy. And he's like, I just watched the Three Ninjas ten times in a row. I got you. And he goes to kick and he just grabs it and you go like. Like you. Then it's like being in the water with an alligator.

[C]

They also make you think that you can put. There's like a. An abundance of stuff you can put in someone's drink that'll make them right.

[B]

Away or they go.

[C]

Kids movies made you think like quicksand, I feel like. And that were gonna be more prominent.

[B]

They also made you think by taking someone's hand as a little child, you could flip a grown man.

[C]

Yeah. And you can.

[B]

He'd just go like this.

[C]

It's just like. You gotta get it at the right. Do it.

[B]

I say the little kid voice. You gotta go with it.

[A]

I am one of those kids, incidentally. Like, I took karate classes. Those commercials were very intimidating. I was never a Tiger Sheldman dojo.

[B]

That's great. I never did that. How long did you do karate for? What belt did you get to?

[A]

I. I. The most embarrassing thing is that I never even got a Blue belt. I was just like, a series of, like, off white just.

[B]

And an occasional stripe. Did you got to yell, I got a right.

[A]

No, I got a stripe. But I. It was just like, I was. You know. Know what's the equivalent of this? It's like being on the. The freshman team.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Not even jv.

[B]

Were you inspired by three ninjas?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

That was what got you in there.

[A]

I mean, that was definitely a radicalizing movie for me.

[B]

Yeah. It got. You were like, mom, I need to take karate.

[A]

Yes. But it's also surf ninjas. There was an era.

[C]

Ninjas were kind of big. Yeah.

[A]

Turtles.

[B]

80S and 90s. Ninja was massive.

[C]

Yeah. It really was.

[B]

You could put ninja on anything. It was like bacon in 08. Like, you could just, like, put ninja on anything. And everyone's like, I love it. I absolutely love it.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. We're an American ninja. We're children ninjas. They just walked into boardrooms and they went, kid ninjas.

[C]

And they went, oh, my God.

[B]

Oh, my God, here's $3 million.

[A]

How many of them are there gonna be?

[B]

Three of them.

[C]

It's perfect.

[B]

Oh, my God, I'm in my pants. And then. That's the problem with Hollywood.

[C]

Mike Ryan Ruiz, Hellman's commercial. I want to find that. That's so bad.

[A]

Mike Ryan was in a Hellman's commercial.

[C]

I don't know. I saw.

[A]

Mike Ryan kind of has the hair that I would ostensibly be trying to.

[B]

Grow with the long. He's got good long hair, huh?

[A]

He has some good bang the full over. Some bang, bang, bang, bang for his buck.

[C]

Oh, this is when I was going on Jeopardy. Because it's all random. Like, who is Spinoza?

[B]

Here comes the tab. Queen 501.

[C]

How to learn everything and then find those. I googled how to learn everything.

[A]

Wait, that's a. That's a tab you have?

[C]

Well, yeah, because it's a YouTube video by somebody named CW called How to study for Jeopardy. Win at Trivia and appreciate urinal Art.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

I mean, I never watched it, so take that. You know, I didn't win. I. I won twice, but I didn't.

[B]

Win the whole thing.

[C]

Oh, my God. Do I have a grade 3 AC joint separation?

[B]

I know that's from. I know what that's from. I didn't think I'd still have. I like that you. I like that you still have that.

[A]

Did you.

[B]

No, someone else did.

[C]

Somebody else did, and they were pretending to not be hurt, and I goog. She mentioned what they said that it was that a hospital Told her. And I. And I wrote it down so that I could Google it later so I wouldn't get caught.

[B]

And you saved it.

[C]

And I. And I saved it.

[B]

I love that. That was when we were up in Colorado.

[C]

It says that it's one of the more painful things you could do to your body.

[A]

You just have a picture of a fast food sandwich.

[C]

Sonic cheeseburger. It's not a picture. I was looking up the Sonic menu cuz I think somebody was going there.

[B]

Yeah. That's when I was doing the Boulder theater. And I went. And you had Sonic for the first time.

[C]

That's right.

[A]

So you just closed that window.

[C]

Okay. I clo. Because I don't need that. You're right.

[B]

And you were disappointed in Sonic. Sonic.

[A]

Remember Marie Kondoing? Your phone right now. Full of Sonic.

[C]

Thank you. Thank you. The Sonic cheeseburger. Thank you for the Carol o'. Connor. I wanted to know his name.

[B]

Damn, dude. You really keep every tab open then.

[C]

I have a. The Tom Holland umbrella. Gif. I always like to have that on here.

[A]

That's a great video.

[C]

Chekhov's gun. I googled what that was because people were saying it a lot.

[A]

Honestly, you keeping the tab for Chekhov's gun and only opening it now feels like a violation or maybe the ultimate fulfillment of the Chekhov's gun.

[B]

That is it.

[C]

And I don't get it. So let me read check off tab. A narrative principle emphasizing that every element in a story be necessary.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

While irrelevant elements should be removed. And this is not irrelevant. For example, if a gun features in a story, there must be a reason for it, such as being fired at some later point. All elements must eventually come.

[A]

And to create the through line through this whole episode.

[B]

Bang, bang. There it is.

[A]

That's podcasting.

[B]

That's how you.

[A]

That's how you podcast.

[B]

Keep them all open. Never. Never shut your tabs.

[C]

Katie Wedding Dresses I'll get to it.

[A]

Pablo Torre Finds out is produced by Walter Averroma, Maxwell Carney, Ryan Cortez, Sam Dawig, Juan Galindo, Patrick Kim, neely Loman, Rob McRae, Matt Sullivan, Claire Taylor and Chris Tuminello. RStudio Engineering by RG Systems Sound Design by NGW Post Theme Song as always by John Bravo and we will talk to you next time.