Podcast Summary: Pablo Torre Finds Out
Episode: "Share & Burn Book & Tell with Joe Mande and Mike Schur"
Date: October 21, 2025
Host: Pablo Torre
Guests: Joe Mande (comedian, writer, Timberwolves superfan), Mike Schur (television writer/producer, Parks and Rec/Good Place)
Episode Overview
This episode of Pablo Torre Finds Out is a wild ride through sports fandom, NBA franchise intrigue, personal quirks, and the pure joy of comedic digression. Pablo is joined by comedian/TV writer Joe Mande and acclaimed showrunner Mike Schur for a blend of investigative journalism (exploring the convoluted Minnesota Timberwolves ownership saga) and offbeat personal storytelling (including custom hats, Twitter bots from Moldova, and elaborate sports trivia games). The tone is waggish and self-aware, veering as often toward jokes about lasagna and prosthetics as it does to billionaire power plays or NBA bylaws.
Key Discussion Points and Insights
1. The Mystery Basketball & Mike Schur’s Collecting
- [02:01] Mike Schur shows off what he claims (with some skepticism) is the basketball used by Larry Bird in a legendary three-point contest:
- Provenance is shaky—a letter from a supposed bystander is the only evidence.
- Quote: "I've decided it's the ball, so… it's the ball." —Mike Schur [03:37]
- The group jokes about memorabilia scams and being perpetually scammed.
2. Joe Mande: Timberwolves Superfan & NBA Obsessive
- [04:28] Joe's Timberwolves devotion is dissected—he's a top-10 all-time fan (just behind gymnast Suni Lee and Craig Kilborn).
- On his Jumbotron letdown: Suni Lee, fresh from Olympic success, ousted Joe’s big moment with the crowd.
3. Digital Nihilism and Twitter Bots
- [05:27] Joe’s provocateur credentials established: bought 1 million Twitter bots, listed his website as TrumpPrisonCamp.com, and kept his location as "H⚝llyw⚝⚝d."
- Quote: “None of this matters. Antarctica is melting.” —Joe, quoting his old Twitter bio [06:18]
- He lost 200k of those bots along the way, possibly funding a Moldovan civil war in the process.
4. The Writers Room Dynamic (Parks & Rec, Good Place, etc.)
- [07:16] Pablo prompts reminiscence on Joe’s alter ego “Morris Lerpiss” and the joy of time-wasting in a comedy writers’ room.
- Sporkle quizzes (“top 500 all-time NBA rebounders,” “all starters from the 2004-05 NBA season”).
- The camaraderie and necessity of “wasting time with nonsense.”
- Quote: “Wasting time with nonsense is one of the great joys of having the job that we have.” —Mike Schur [11:08]
5. Anthony Edwards: Timberwolves Messiah
- [13:10] Joe reveals his wardrobe: Anthony Edwards Georgia giveaway tee; discusses Edwards as possibly above Kevin Garnett in his heart.
- Quote: "He's my son, but Garnett's my dad." —Joe Mande [14:20]
- Joe would “jump in front of a bullet” for Edwards, but “not for my mom—she’s lived a full life and can’t win a championship.” [14:32]
6. The Timberwolves Ownership Saga: A Real-Life Farce
Glenn Taylor – The Bane & The Bed
- [23:05] Glenn Taylor outlined as Timberwolves’ long-suffering owner: former state senator, paper magnate, chicken processing tycoon.
- [24:51] Table-read of oral history recreates Adam Silver and Glenn Taylor’s 1994 handshake deal—literally from a bed in a Minneapolis hotel room.
- Quote: “There was a queen sized bed and a phone on each side of the bed...as if you were reading a book on each side.” —Mike Schur as Adam Silver [26:32]
The Sale, the Step Transaction, and the Civil War
- [28:33] In 2021, Taylor agreed to sell the Wolves and Lynx to Alex Rodriguez and Marc Lore for $1.5B, to be paid over time (a "step transaction").
- For comparison: Suns, Hornets, Lakers, and Celtics all sold for astronomically higher sums soon after.
- [30:53] In March 2024, Taylor declared Lore/Rodriguez had failed to meet their payment and called off the sale—a claim refuted by direct evidence found by Pablo.
- Quote: "Glenn Taylor's allegation is, they're broke boys." —Pablo Torre [33:20]
- Lore/Rodriguez were literally locked out of team facilities.
Glenn Taylor’s “Burn Book” Exposed
- [39:12] During arbitration, Taylor’s team circulated a literal “burn book”: 77 numbered complaints (e.g., “A-Rod did steroids,” “Marc Lore had dinner with Garnett without telling me”).
- Quote: "Burn book. As in, a Mean Girls–style list...77 things Glenn Taylor/the Wolves hate about Mark Lore and Alex Rodriguez." —Pablo [39:12]
- Cited as a baffling legal strategy, banking on personal pettiness to sway NBA opinion.
The NBA Owners’ Vote & Final Twist
- [44:44] In a remote NBA owners’ vote, Taylor mounts a last-ditch (and slightly farcical) defense, but ultimately the sale is enforced.
- [47:05] Taylor’s legacy clause: He secures four courtside seats for the next decade, ensuring that the "bane" of Joe’s existence isn’t going anywhere, even in “retirement.”
- Quote: “That dude’s not going anywhere, man.” —Pablo [47:17]
- Mike Schur: “There’s a class of people…who have determined that shamelessness is a market inefficiency.” [47:27]
7. Joe Mande’s Genuine Wolves Fandom
- [49:35] Joe recalls awkward/sweet/ludicrous run-ins with Wolves players and, way back, Alex Rodriguez—in a Mall of America incident involving being high, falling into a shoe display, and an argument about the word “whack.”
- Quote: “My only real interaction with Alex Rodriguez is him turning around briefly and seeing me and my friend on drugs falling into a pyramid of shoebox.” —Joe [51:43]
- [50:28] Despite the drama, Joe is “truly in love with this team.” Anthony Edwards' dog, nostalgia, and hope are recurring themes.
8. The Mania of Embroidered Hats: The “Share & Tell” Segment
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[53:50] Joe’s COVID-project: hand-embroidering hats using team logos to spell absurd or tailored words for friends.
- Examples:
- Brewers’ “MB” = Crab Meat [54:53]
- Astros’ “H” = Horny [56:24]
- Royals’ “KC” = Kurt Cobain
- Giants’ “SF” = Transfusion
- Mets’ logo spells out “NyQuil” down the brim
- Tigers’ hat says “Dershowitz”
- Examples:
-
The comedic highlight: a guessing game of obscure hat wordplay ("Shelley Duvall" from Padres “SD”; “Timothée Chalamet" from Twins “TC”; “Coney 2012” from Giants “NY”).
- Quote: "This is like the true workings of a maniac." —Joe [61:04]
-
Hats were auctioned for charity. Mike Schur received "crab meat," Seth Rogen traded a vase for “Shelley Duvall."
-
Shift into “future hat assignment” for the post-Taylor Timberwolves. Mike pledges to buy with his “aspiration” card, in a callback to their earlier financial-tangents.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- "He's my son, but Garnett's my dad." —Joe Mande on Anthony Edwards and Kevin Garnett [14:20]
- "Wasting time with nonsense is one of the great joys of having the job that we have." —Mike Schur [11:08]
- "None of this matters. Antarctica is melting." —Joe Mande’s Twitter bio [06:18]
- "Burn book. As in, a Mean Girls–style list...77 things Glenn Taylor/the Wolves hate about Mark Lore and Alex Rodriguez." —Pablo Torre [39:12]
- "There’s a class of people…who have determined that shamelessness is a market inefficiency." —Mike Schur [47:27]
- "I remember you texting me pictures of these because I selected, I believe, crab meat..." —Mike Schur, on receiving one of Joe’s hats [61:10]
- "My only real interaction with Alex Rodriguez is him turning around briefly and seeing me and my friend on drugs falling into a pyramid of shoebox." —Joe Mande [51:43]
Timestamps for Important Segments
| Timestamp | Topic/Segment | |--------------|----------------------------------------------------| | 02:01–03:42 | Mike Schur’s "Larry Bird" basketball story | | 04:28–05:21 | Joe’s Timberwolves superfan lore | | 05:27–07:09 | Twitter bots, digital nihilism | | 07:16–11:32 | Writers room dynamics, sports trivia, time-wasting | | 13:10–14:32 | Anthony Edwards worship | | 23:05–27:30 | Glenn Taylor profile, the bed negotiation skit | | 28:33–34:42 | Step transaction, Wolves’ ownership civil war | | 39:12–43:59 | The Burn Book: 77 reasons vs. Lore & Rodriguez | | 44:44–47:27 | Final NBA vote; Taylor’s courtside seats deal | | 49:35–51:43 | Joe’s Wolves devotion, A-Rod Mall of America story | | 53:50–59:00 | Embroidered hats—Share & Tell game | | 61:10–62:59 | Joe’s mania, Seth Rogen vase swap, future hats |
Final Thoughts & Tone
The hosts and guests delight in the weird overlap between sports, personal eccentricity, and the larger-than-life foibles of powerful men. The franchise drama is never too far from a punchline: Pablo’s investigation into Timberwolves ownership is both a comedy and a tragedy for diehards like Joe, and a farce for everyone else. Jokes about “mean girls–style burn books,” Moldovan Twitter bots, lasagna-centric team gatherings, prosthetic-laden sitcom cameos, and hat embroidery mania serve as tongue-in-cheek markers for the episode’s central thesis: sports—like comedy—are best consumed with a side of self-aware absurdity.
The show ends on a fitting note: Joe is challenged to commemorate the new Timberwolves regime with another singularly odd, possibly unwearable hat, as Mike pledges to buy it with his carbon-offset debit card.
For listeners new to the Timberwolves saga or the podcast’s tone, this episode is part NBA exposé, part comedy writers’ hang, and all delightfully askew.
