Rory Wins Back To Back Masters, Scott Van Pelt Joins Us Live From Augusta, NBA Playoffs Set + Who's Back Of The Week

Summary

Pardon My Take – “Rory Wins Back To Back Masters, Scott Van Pelt Joins Us Live From Augusta, NBA Playoffs Set + Who's Back Of The Week”

Date: April 13, 2026
Hosts: Big Cat & PFT Commenter (Barstool Sports), with guests and producers

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Episode Overview

This post-Masters Monday delivers the classic, irreverent “Pardon My Take” blend: an in-depth, mostly affectionate roast of Rory McIlroy’s historic back-to-back Masters titles, a traditional interview with ESPN anchor Scott Van Pelt (SVP) from Augusta’s airport lounge, NBA playoff hot takes (including a deep-dive on tanking, beer pricing, and the joyless regular season), NHL and EPL storylines, and the trademark “Who’s Back of the Week.”

Expect sharp opinions, competitive sports energy, and inside-sports media banter—this one’s for sports obsessives who also want big laughs.

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Main Segments & Key Discussion Points

1. Rory McIlroy’s Back-to-Back Masters Victory

Timestamps: 02:55 - 31:22

• First Reactions:

  • Mixed feelings on Rory’s win; acknowledgment of his greatness but strong “not our guy” energy.
    • “Congrats to Rory... I think we should invite, I think we should make Rory say no to coming on this podcast.” (PFT Commenter, 03:16)
    • “He’s now at six [majors]... he’s still obviously chasing Tiger, he’s still chasing Jack Nicklaus.” (Hank, 03:35)
  • Recognition: Only fourth time ever someone has repeated at the Masters (Nicklaus, Faldo, Woods, McIlroy).

• Tournament Narrative & Key Competitors:

  • Recap of late drama: Rory’s massive lead was cut, with Scotty Scheffler, Justin Rose, and Cam Young lurking.
  • The afternoon lacked the chaotic playoff potential the hosts craved:
    • “There was a moment on Sunday where it was like, are we going to have a five-person playoff?” (PFT Commenter, 20:21)
  • Rory managed the course, played “fast and confident,” and—unlike “vintage Rory”—didn’t choke.

• Rory Critique & Private Jet Mini-Scandal:

  • Story about Rory flying his private jet for daily Augusta practice. Hosts mockingly ponder the carbon footprint, but admit “if you had the means, you’d do it.”
    • “He used up an entire brontosaurus.” (PFT Commenter, 09:17)
    • “You probably killed 500,000 people doing that, hope it was worth your time.” (Hank, 08:40)

• Golf Media/Culture Notes:

  • Harsh critiques of Augusta’s TV camera work in the final holes:
    • “We didn’t see Rory’s ball go in the hole to win the tournament. Might not have gone in.” (PFT, 11:09-11:15)
    • Repeated shots of “teens drinking beer in Northern Ireland.”
  • Augusta traditions lampooned: hat discourse (egg salad), “should you shrink the crowd?”, cell phone confiscation praised.

• Other Players:

  • Sergio Garcia’s emotional outburst (“He smashed his driver, hit the water cooler, but if you’ve got a green jacket, they can’t keep you out!”)
  • Homages to Max Homa (“Max is going to win one”), Brooks Koepka and Jake Knapp making the cut for “PMT sweep” next year.

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2. Interview: Scott Van Pelt Live from Augusta Airport

Timestamps: 80:27 - 116:47

• Masters Recap with SVP:

  • SVP wasn’t rooting for Rory, wanted a win for Justin Rose (“I want him to win one, Rory already has one” 81:28).
  • Observations on diminished drama: “It was close, but kind of fake close... Never got that sense we’re playing five-wide into darkness.” (SVP, 83:17)
  • Admits Rory’s previous win “lifted all the baggage.” If he hadn’t won last year, “I don’t think he’d have held up” (SVP, 85:36)

• On Rory’s Preparation/‘Mamba Mentality’:

  • SVP laughs off the “PJ Practice” criticism: “Why wouldn’t he become the most prepared golfer for this tournament?” (88:07)

• Future Major Predictions:

  • Over/under for Rory’s career majors set at 8.5. SVP: “Three more seems like a lot... Eight feels like a healthy number.” (88:44)
  • Would take Scotty Scheffler over Rory on total majors, citing more “runway”: “Just trying to be Hot Take Scotty.” (89:54)

• Deep Cut Augusta/Nerd Golf Q&A:

  • Confirms, as a “media guy permitted a cell phone,” it still feels like contraband (“Even though I know I’m allowed... if I pull it out, I still sort of hide it...”

• Classic SVP Banter:

  • “Big Texas” pastry running joke: “It’s my version of Max Homa’s ‘spicy meatball.’ It’s all I heard all week at Augusta.” (108:32)
  • Culinary and Vegas stories: Gentle ribbing over wining and dining, blackjack, and the perennial prospect of joining a PMT-fueled bachelor party.

• Augusta Course Difficulty Mythbusting:

  • Hank claims he could break 110 at Augusta from the tips in 10 tries.
  • SVP: “You have no chance of doing that... It’s so much harder than you think.” (112:48)

Memorable SVP Quotes

• “It’s not a question. It’s a statement. ‘Hey, Scott. Big Texas.’” (109:47)
• [On Rory] “He gets to go to the champions locker room last night. He knows he’s good. If he hadn’t won last year... the weight would have been too much.” (86:34)

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3. NBA Playoffs & Regular Season Anti-Tanking Rants

Timestamps: 33:29 – 47:00 (main), sprinkled throughout

• Doc Rivers Departs Milwaukee (“departing,” not fired):

  • “He is the original constantly hoarse basketball head coach.” (34:14)
  • PMT lampoons his “Google me” plea, suggests he’ll either get another exec job or retire.

• Tanking Exposé:

  • Jazz vs. Grizzlies “once-in-a-generation tank-off”: Four 10-day guys, triple-doubles, active benching of hot hands, total apathy.
    • “It was unbelievable... a must-lose game for both teams.” (35:00)
    • “It’s gotten to the point where it’s just, it’s blatant.” (36:36)
  • Brainstorming league solutions: “Dynamic beer pricing”—winners pay more for beer, losers get 10-cent beers.
    • “Wizards fans deserve to have 10-cent beers for every game.” (38:06)
  • General consensus: This was “the worst NBA regular season” of their lifetimes—too much tanking, non-competitive halves, fan malaise.

• NBA Playoff matchups & Play-In Snark:

  • PMT crew debates who even wants to be in the Play-In, mocks the Sixers’ perennial status as “fodder” for Boston.
    • “Max, everybody said last year the Knicks had no chance [against the Celtics].” (42:11)
  • Shot at Play-In logic: “I don’t like the Play-In... the ninth and 10th seed are not going to win.” (42:20)
  • Futures bets: “Just gotta get Embiid back”; the crew gamely rallies behind the Sixers.

See also: playful worries about Boston’s psyche, good-natured Philly/New York banter, and speculation on Brian Windhorst’s hotel strategy.

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4. “Who’s Back of the Week”

Timestamps: 57:28 – 78:14

• Justin Bieber / “Bieberchella”:

  • Biebs is “back,” performing at Coachella (“the most relatable and hateable couple of all time” – Bieber + Katy Perry + Justin Trudeau references, 57:31)
  • “There’s nowhere that looks more appealing to be at than the Masters, and nowhere that looks less appealing than Coachella.” (E, 58:14)

• Alexander Ovechkin / NHL Playoff Bubble Watch:

  • “If we make the playoffs he might be back next year.” (Hank, 62:41)
  • Detailed breakdown of Capitals vs. Flyers playoff math, getting lost in statistical weeds.

• Peculiar Statues:

  • Bad honorary sports statue design (Ichiro, with “sad bat” energy, 71:26)

• Communication Faux Pas:

  • Group debate (playfully heated) about the tone in texting: is “K” or “OK” more passive-aggressive?
    • “I fire off K when I’m upset.” (PFT, 73:35)
    • “K period is I’m pissed at you.” (Max, 74:55)

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5. EPL Relegation Stakes

Timestamps: 49:43 – 56:53

• The crew discusses the schadenfreude potential of Tottenham Hotspur, a giant EPL club, facing relegation.
  • “I’m excited about the idea of a team that has this much invested potentially getting relegated.” (Hank, 51:09)
  • “They just bottled so many times, over and over.” (PFT, 53:12)
• Humorous confusion over EPL teams, cities, mascots—classic PMT as American sports fans dipping their toes in soccer.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• On tanking/the NBA regular season:

  • “Wizards fans deserve to have 10-cent beers for every game.” (Hank, 38:06)

• On cell phone bans at Augusta:

  • “If you pull out your phone, buddy, you’re taking your badge into your own hands.” (SVP, 94:06)

• On Max Homa’s near-miss:

  • “Max is going to win one. I really believe that... He’s just putting it together all four days.” (PFT, 14:36)

• On being snubbed by athletes:

  • “Mount Rushmore of guys never coming on this podcast: LeBron, Rory, Taylor Swift... Bryson has a way better chance than Rory.” (PFT & Hank, 16:25–16:36)

• Scott Van Pelt, on being Big Texas meme famous:

  • “It’s not a question. It’s a statement. ‘Hey, Scott. Big Texas.’” (SVP, 109:47)

• Augusta mythbusting:

  • “If you gave me 10 tries from the tips at Augusta, I could break 110 on two of those tries.” (Hank, 112:34)
  • SVP: “You have no chance of doing that... It’s so much harder than you think.” (112:48)

• On Rory’s “private jet” preparation:

  • “He used up an entire brontosaurus.” (PFT Commenter, 09:17)

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Additional Highlights & Running Jokes

• Lengthy ranking of celebrities most likely to never appear on PMT (“LeBron, Rory, Taylor Swift...”).
• Recap of golf etiquette, Augusta’s morality clause, and hat-gate (egg salad and domestic beer hat suggestions).
• “No technology” events as a growing (craved!) trend—a bar or concert where you surrender your phone for social benefit.
• Masters-tier riffing: Vending machine confusion (“condiment dispenser!”), “dinner time” with SVP, and Vegas misadventures.
• Accusatory, over-analytical break-downs of “K’s” in text messages and the root of “OK.”
• Hint of actual inside reporting: DOJ investigating the NFL; wild speculation that the Murdoch family is behind it (“Follow the money”).

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Timestamps to Jump In

• 02:55 – Start of Masters/Rory deep dive
• 33:29 – NBA tanking, regular season rant begins
• 36:34 – Epic Jazz/Grizzlies tank-off analysis
• 57:28 – Who’s Back of the Week
• 80:27 – Scott Van Pelt interview from Augusta
• 112:34 – Augusta mythbusting ("Can you break 110?” debate)
• 116:47 – Episode outro, NBA bracket wrap-up

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Summary Table

| Topic | Time Range | Key Contributors | |-----------------------------|----------------|------------------| | Rory’s Masters Victory | 02:55–31:22 | Big Cat, PFT, Hank, SVP | | NBA Playoffs & Tanking | 33:29–47:00 | Big Cat, PFT, Hank, Max | | Scott Van Pelt Interview | 80:27–116:47 | Big Cat, PFT, Hank, SVP | | Who’s Back | 57:28–78:14 | All | | EPL Relegation | 49:43–56:53 | Big Cat, PFT, Hank, Zach |

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Final Thoughts

This PMT episode is a masterclass in making sports discourse fun, funny, and incisively critical—especially when it comes to the Masters’ pageantry (and hypocrisy), the NBA’s tank-a-thon, and the “PMT Extended Universe” of running gags. Scott Van Pelt’s annual post-Masters cameo is a show highlight, balancing insight and self-parody. If you want all the inside jokes, expert sports banter, and quotable moments to stay in the loop, this is essential listening.

Favorite Sign-Off:

“It’s not a question. It’s a statement. ‘Hey, Scott. Big Texas.’” (Scott Van Pelt, 109:47)

“Congrats to Rory. Good job.” (PFT Commenter, 19:03—grudging, as only PMT can deliver.)

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See episode for sponsors and full banter. Skip to [02:55] for serious golf talk, [80:27] for the SVP interview, or [33:29] for NBA playoff/tanking takes.

Transcript

[PFT Commenter]

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[Zach]

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[Scott Van Pelt]

Hey, football guy.

[Hank]

Yeah, martin m y.

[PFT Commenter]

Welcome to Part of My take presented by DraftKings. The crown is yours. Today is Monday, April 13th, and Rory McElroy has gone back to back at Augusta. He puts the green Jacket on himself. Boys, first of all, congrats to Rory.

[Hank]

Hey, congrats to Rory.

[PFT Commenter]

I think we should, I think we should invite, I think we should make Rory say no to coming on this podcast.

[Hank]

Yeah. I mean Rory has open invite him. He's always had the open invitation. He hasn't taken it up yet.

[PFT Commenter]

He will say no.

[Hank]

But yeah, a lot of people are saying that Rory can't go on the big one.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

That he's been ducking this and that's going to be the one glaring empty spot on his resume.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

When everyone looks at it, when it's all said and done, you've got, you've got Brooks, he's got five. You got Rory who is now at seven. Now six. He's at six or he's at six. So at six, I believe is Faldo. It's Lee Trevino and one other guy.

[PFT Commenter]

It's a lot of guys in the olden times. And then he's still obviously chasing Tiger. He's still chasing Jack Nicklaus. There's a lot of. I was looking at it earlier.

[Hank]

It's, it's Faldo, Mickelson, Lee Trevino and Rory and they, they, they're all tied now. And then once you get to that next level, then it's like the gods of golf.

[E]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

It's the, the Tom Watson, Gary Player, Ben Hogan, Jack Nicklaus, Walter Hagen, who I think played in like the twenties. Tiger woods got the.

[Hank]

I, I think at seven. That's when he catches with Arnold Palmer, which is kind of crazy.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. He also, that is only the fourth time ever that someone has gone back to, back in Masters. So that was, who was it? It was Jack Nicklaus. I think it was Nick Faldo. Sir Nick Faldo. Sorry, excuse me. And then Tiger Woods. So it hasn't happened in 25 years. Rory does it. It's also kind of cool that like this gol. This age golf, it's been like, hey, the two, the two big guys are Rory and Scotty. They were going head to head today. They've also won four out of the last five Masters. Jon Rom being the one in the middle there. So yeah, incredible. I mean we don't let, we're not a Rory podcast. But you have to say like he, I actually think that if he didn't win last year, this one he would have probably choked away because he kind of had that, he, he had that huge lead. He has six stroke lead going into the weekend. He did not play great on Saturday. Everyone kind of caught up to him. And then he played good enough today where he didn't make any, you know, huge, huge mistakes on the back nine. He felt like. It felt like he was playing very fast, too. He was just getting up there, like, confident, like, hey, I just know what I need to hit. And there was a few moments. Scotty's putt on 17 that didn't drop. There was. Justin Rose had the lead for a little bit there. Cam Young started the day looking like he was going to maybe win. It didn't. So Rory, he held everyone off.

[Hank]

And then it's a Rory on 18. It looked like we were in for vintage Rory. And I think that's, that's the difference between this year and last year for a lot of people is that we. It was so painful last year.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

And I think everybody, even the, the biggest Rory haters, came around to kind of rooting for him on Sunday. But since he's got.

[PFT Commenter]

I was not rooting for him since

[Hank]

he's got that green jack.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, I was not.

[Hank]

I think that most people watching him on 18 this year were kind of hoping for a good old fashioned Rory choke job.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Like, he's got it. And plus, if it was going to be Scotty, like, that would be a great, A great story for Scotty, too. And he. The putt on 17 just didn't turn at the last second. It was like half a ball that he missed. I would hit that putt easily.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, easily.

[Hank]

Sometimes these guys know the course too much and they overthink the course. It's like, you know, if you're married to somebody for like 60 years, all you do is fight. You know, you lose sight of what makes that person so great. Not a guy like me. But yeah, Scotty, he was. He played really well on Sunday. Roy did not play that well over the weekend, but he played really well.

[PFT Commenter]

That's why. Get it. That's why you get a huge lead. That's why you. He. He was. He was in the lead for every single day of the tournament, which is pretty crazy. So, you know, pretty much wire to wire.

[Hank]

It helps when you have a private jet that can fly you back and forth to Augusta for day trips, too.

[PFT Commenter]

I. So I initially saw that story for people who missed it. Rory said after, I believe it was Thursday that he. He has been coming up, going up to Augusta, dropping his daughter off at school, hopping on his plane, going to Augusta, practicing, then getting back in home. Home in time for dinner. First of all, what a flex. I think everyone, if they had the means to do that. Not only to have the private jet, but also to play Augusta would do it in a heartbeat. I initially wanted to shit on it being like, that's not fair. That's. That's basically like Mamba mentality. Or, you know, when, like, the stories of. Of mj. Any of these guys who are just crazy competitive and they put in all the work. That's just what Rory was doing. It just happened to be that it needed a private jet for it.

[Hank]

Yeah. I mean, I don't think that it's unfair. I think anybody can do it.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I wanted.

[PFT Commenter]

I wanted to say it was unfair just because I'm not the biggest Rory fan. And. But. And I know golf is so weird because it feels like whenever there's a winner, we all have to congratulate the winner. Like, why can't we root for guys?

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

It's like any other sport, you know? Like, I wasn't rooting for Rory. I was rooting for Scotty. I would have been happy with Justin Rose would have been fine with Cam Young.

[Hank]

Anyone? Anyone but Rory.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. Who. Who else was close?

[E]

Russy.

[Hank]

Russ was up there.

[PFT Commenter]

He does nothing for me. I probably would have gone Rory over Russell Henley. Just because Rory winning back to back was up there. That would have been fun.

[Hank]

Trail Hatton. Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Our guy Max played his walls off.

[Hank]

But back to the. Back to the Rory thing.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Because. Because it did become a story that he would go in and he practices, like, every week. I think he. He said, on the record, at least, like, six. Where he flew in and out. Who knows how much is. You're right. It's not unfair to. And you. You can't. You can't really, like, hate on the guy for doing that when he has the opportunity. But what we can do is we can then choose to be selective in displaying outrage about the environment footprint. So we can be like, hey, Rory, I hope it was worth the fact that you. Like you. You probably killed 500,000 people doing that, and I hope it's worth your time. I think it's a carbon footprint of, like, one average adult in the United States over the course of. Of three years.

[PFT Commenter]

He used up an entire brontosaurus.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

So I hope you're happy to get to it.

[Hank]

I hope you're happy. It's not. Hey, Rory, it's not like we're fighting wars over oil or anything right now. It's not like people are laying their lives down because of our consumption of oil. So I. I'm glad that at least you got you found it useful.

[PFT Commenter]

It is. It is pretty crazy, the back to back. What if he just never loses the Masters again? Is now it's. It's like, you know, when we're. We're all getting older, but every now and then I'll be in a situation where I play some beer pong and it's like, hey, maybe I still have it. Maybe I. Maybe I'll just. Maybe I'll just hit every shot. Maybe I'll be a 20 year old myself again. What if Rory is just like, hey, I'm just done losing it Augusta. Like I did that for a really long time. Wasn't much fun. Now I'm just going to win every year.

[Hank]

That's what Freddie couple said this weekend. He was watching Roaring. He was like, he just might not ever lose.

[PFT Commenter]

He might not.

[Hank]

It might just. We might have to. Rory proof it like when we tiger proofed it back in the day. Yeah, like we got a Rory proof. I don't know what that means. Taller trees. He got. He found himself in the on 18. I don't know how they found that ball, dude. The tree, the camera work. Can we say?

[PFT Commenter]

Well, the camera was. I. I put a note on it.

[Hank]

I am usually the number one like golf cameraman simp in the world. I will remind people that the. The camera work that they do during these tournaments is absolutely insane. Finding the ball, all that stuff, I. I will. I will always stand up for them. This was a major black guy in the profession. The, the camera work, I'd say for the last 40 minutes of the tournament was terrible.

[PFT Commenter]

We didn't see Rory's tee shot where it landed. We didn't see Cam Young's tee shot where it landed. We didn't see Rory's second shot where it landed. We didn't see Cam Young's second shot where it landed. They then went to a bunker view for Rory's third shot. That made no sense.

[Hank]

Yep.

[PFT Commenter]

We also didn't see Rory's ball go in the hole to win the tournament.

[Hank]

Might not have gone in.

[PFT Commenter]

It's crazy. It was just.

[Hank]

I.

[PFT Commenter]

It was baffling how bad the camera work got down the stretch and yeah, it just. Look, Rory's. Rory's awesome. He's really good at golf. And oh, by the way, we did see. So we didn't see all those shots. We did get to see a bunch of teenagers drinking beer in Northern Ireland about a thousand times so that at least they nailed that one. That one was good. I actually had more than enough of that.

[Hank]

I like that. That was okay. Like, at the. The home track at Hollywood course. Also, shout out to Sergio Garcia.

[PFT Commenter]

Sergio.

[Hank]

What a day. What a day Sergio had. On the second hole, he hit his drive. I don't know why he freaked out. He hit his drive into a bunker, but just because he hit his drive too far.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

So the bunker is, what, like, 310 yards away, Hank. And he. He spanked it just, like, rolled into it.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. Hank, what was about 310?

[E]

I think, like 3:15.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

You have your book out, so why

[Hank]

do you get pissed off about that?

[PFT Commenter]

I don't know.

[E]

I just didn't like where it ended up.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, but you know what? It's also.

[E]

Someone pointed out. It's, like, the fact that you're that mad on the second hole.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[E]

So something else is going on.

[Hank]

He took his bunker. He smashed into the ground, smashed it into the water cooler. And then later on in that hole, he picked up John Rom's bag, and he was like, I'll just carry your bag down the courts for you.

[PFT Commenter]

He also, afterwards, didn't show much remorse. He got dinged by Augusta. They were like, hey, we're. We're. We're. We're giving you a. Not a penalty, but a warning. But afterwards, he kind of laughed it off because he's got a green jacket, and they can never stop inviting him. That's. I saw there was a. There's a debate this weekend, like, which would. Which would rather have the gold jacket from the Pro Football hall of Fame or the green jacket? I. It has to be green jacket. What comes with the green jacket is insane. Just being able to go there. You get to play this course, and you get to play in the tournament for the rest of your life. It's insane.

[Hank]

It's pretty good.

[PFT Commenter]

Sercio can just smash his driver, and they can be like, hey, sir, please don't do that. And he's like, you know what? Guess what? You're with me for life because I won one of these things, and I'm coming back for as long as I want.

[Hank]

I think that there might be a secret rule where if Augusta's membership votes on, they can get a guy kicked out.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Even if you win a master, probably. I think that if. If you're hating. I don't know, though, amongst the champions, if you disrespect the course. And the course is rules.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. Do they. You think they have, like, a morality clause? Because then they would have. I mean, Tiger probably would have had a couple meetings about that.

[Hank]

I don't think a morality clause. I think maybe a. Like if you. If you bring a cell phone onto the case.

[PFT Commenter]

What about Bobby Mack? He's, you know, he got in trouble. Right.

[Hank]

I kind of like that, though, for. For flipping off the course.

[PFT Commenter]

Flipping off the course?

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Off the patrons. Can't do that.

[Hank]

No. There's one shot, too, that Gary Woodland had. I think it was on Friday. He hit his ball, like, way to the right and then was trying to pitch out to get back on the green. I think it was his third shot. And the patrons were lined up on that side of the green and they wouldn't move because you put your seat down and that's where you're entitled to stay.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

For the entire day. So Gary Woodland had to hit, like, just a little running ball and lay up short of the patrons so then he could get on the green for his next shot. Yeah, I like that.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

They built a wall.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. We also had our guy Max have an incredible round on Sunday. He went from. I think he was in the 20s all the way up to tied for ninth.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

So gets this. I think he got like 600 grand. Max is going to win one. I really believe that he was in it. He's. I mean, he's finished tied for 12 or 12th or better. Three straight years at Augusta. He's playing the course well. It's just putting it together all four days. Yeah.

[Hank]

If you look back on how he is playing, like last year compared to this year, he's. He's playing way better.

[PFT Commenter]

Right.

[Hank]

I think Matt, you know, he didn't

[PFT Commenter]

have any bad rounds. Like, it wasn't that he had a bad rounds. He's just. It's to. It's. It's actually funny if you look at the last. I think it's like five or six. It's. Up until Dustin Johnson won the COVID year, the winning score at Augusta has been like minus 10 to minus 12. Every. Like, that's what it is. It's just they've dialed it, the course to be exactly that. I know people were mad that they nerfed it a little bit by spraying it with water on the weekend, but that's what it is. And Max is. I mean, he's, you know, he finished minus eight today. He's right there.

[Hank]

Yeah. Max played really well. I'm proud of Max. I think this is Max's year.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. And Brooks got an invite back, too. I think he would have gotten one anyway, but he finished top 12. Yeah. Automatic invite.

[Hank]

Brooks is right in there.

[PFT Commenter]

Our Guys are back in.

[Hank]

Our guy Jake Knapp also finished number 11.

[PFT Commenter]

What's more impressive, winning back to back Masters or getting both of your friends back in the Masters next year?

[Hank]

Like, how many dudes just have two friends that are playing out August?

[PFT Commenter]

Right. And we just got. We just got both of them back at the tournament next year.

[Hank]

They're calling.

[PFT Commenter]

Rory just got himself.

[Hank]

They're calling.

[PFT Commenter]

Just so we're clear, Rory did not get anyone else. We got two guys.

[Hank]

They're calling it the PMT sweep.

[PFT Commenter]

I would love to. Again, we'll make Rory say no, but I would love to ask him, like, what's more impressive in your mind, have you ever gotten two of your friends automatic qualifications to Augusta? Definitely on the same Sunday.

[Hank]

Definitely not.

[PFT Commenter]

Rory might be the top of the

[E]

list of guys who are never coming on this podcast.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, yeah.

[Hank]

Really? The top.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, let's do it real quick. Mount Rushmore of guys never coming on this podcast.

[Hank]

Okay.

[PFT Commenter]

LeBron, Bryson, Bryce. I don't know about that. I think Bryson way better chance than. Than Rory.

[Hank]

I think at some point he'll. He'll need it.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay, so. So Rory probably Vrabel at this point. Chris Paul for sure. Who else?

[Hank]

LeBron.

[PFT Commenter]

LeBron. Although LeBron, like, what if he's in the Internet invitational? He's like, these guys are so funny. We want to do a pot. I think we could trick him.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

To be like, hey, can you just come to our suite real quick?

[E]

I want to Swift.

[PFT Commenter]

I want to show you our. Our producer's tattoo.

[Hank]

Yeah. Taylor Swift might do it.

[PFT Commenter]

Taylor Swift would not be doing. Yeah, that's. That's definitely on there. All right, so wait, let's do a top 10, top 10 most likely people to never come back on the podcast or come on the podcast. Rory McElroy, LeBron James, Taylor Swift, Vini. Chris Paul. Who else? Who else?

[Hank]

I'm gonna say Dr. Anthony Fauci.

[PFT Commenter]

You think he will? And he's invited back on Rob Schneider. Rob Schneider. Good one. Definitely not. Cena will come back on, right?

[E]

Kareem.

[PFT Commenter]

Kareem still alive. I think that's about. That's eight. That's eight good ones. Trying to think who else? If there's anyone else.

[Max]

Justin Bieber probably will never come on

[PFT Commenter]

Coach K. Coach K. Yeah.

[Hank]

No, I could see Coach K doing.

[PFT Commenter]

I wouldn't want him.

[Hank]

No, I could see him. I could see him. He's in the media.

[PFT Commenter]

They mean things. Okay. Yeah, that's. That seems like that.

[Max]

You gotta think that there's like, aaaa. Listers that'll just never come on.

[Hank]

Yeah, well, yeah, but that's. That's what I'm sending Sweeney.

[PFT Commenter]

Sure.

[Max]

That's what I'm saying. Like, there's.

[PFT Commenter]

I think she might. Come on. We get more videos. Zach talking about sleeping in.

[Max]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Those eyes popping. I think that's definitely happening. That absolutely could happen. Oh, what's his name? Jared Dudley.

[Hank]

Throwback.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Remember when he announced that he was coming on?

[Hank]

And then.

[PFT Commenter]

And then, like, a few people on Twitter were like, don't do barstool. And he's like, I better not do barstool. One of the most random guys ever. To be like, I'm gonna. Here's my line in the sand bars, I would say, hey, Jared Dudley are bad.

[Hank]

Yeah. There's. I think amongst golfers, he's probably the only one that we can say, yeah, would probably not like to come on Varsal Sports Properties.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Hank]

But, I mean, all it would take would be one nice, like, video from Dave when Dave bet on him, and then Rory changes to him.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. Yeah. We just say nice things about him.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

But congrats to Rory. Good job.

[Hank]

Very much congrats.

[PFT Commenter]

I guess he will be coming up and he'll tell us how awesome he is. That's why we have SVP on. So when someone wins that we don't like, he can. Scott can actually tell us why we should like him, and we'll be like, yeah, because Scott's the best.

[Hank]

I think that it would. It. It's going to be good for golf to have a guy that's dominant that we don't like.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

I think that's good for us, too. It keeps on our toes as a podcast because it's very easy. Like, Scotty Scheffler. He. He wasn't the most dynamic guy in front of the media when he started to win. We got to know him, the most likable person.

[PFT Commenter]

Well, the fact that he likes Stu Finer means that he's the man. Yeah, no, I. I agree. I don't. I. I don't understand golf fans who like everyone or like every single person who wins. Like, that's just not.

[Hank]

It doesn't make sense to me.

[PFT Commenter]

This is gonna have some people you don't like.

[Hank]

This is residual liking for all the losing that he's done in the past.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Like, he. He lost so much when it counted in, like, major, major moments that a lot of people develop that sympathy liking of Rory. And it's just like, I want this poor little guy to just succeed one time.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, and he did.

[Hank]

And then he did it again. And then he did it again. And now he's good. Because everyone's like, oh, thank you. Come on, Rory, great job. We still remember you're a loser. Eventually we're going to get sick. Like, the average golfer is going to be starting to get sick of Rory winning major championships.

[PFT Commenter]

Well, and here's the. The honest truth about it. It has less to do with. Last year, I was pissed. This year it was more to do with the fact that there was a moment on Sunday where it was like, are we going to have a five team, a five person playoff? Like, that was. That was a realistic thing with everyone bunched up. So to not have any type of playoff kind of sucked. Like, I wanted to see Scotty and Rory go into a playoff. Yeah, it would have been awesome.

[Hank]

It would have been great.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. So that was part of it. Other Masters notes, I. The egg salad guy. I know we talked about the hats, the shrink movement that everyone says that, you know, we got to get rid of all these people who are new into golf. I think the egg salad hat guy rules because I think he made that as a custom hat. That's a custom hat?

[Hank]

Yeah. They didn't sell that one.

[PFT Commenter]

That one is a custom hat if you love egg salad that much. And I also was just thinking about it, like that guy wearing that hat on Monday morning back at work. That's very funny.

[Hank]

The only way the hat could be better is if the letters were a little bit larger and if it was upside down. Yeah. It's also, then that hat would absolutely rock.

[PFT Commenter]

I think it's also the fact that it's egg salad, because it's not like if you had a hat that said bacon or you had a hat that said hamburger or ice cream. Everyone loves that. This guy's hat just says fart sandwich. Like, you're going to eat it. You're going to eat a sandwich that smells like a fart, and everyone's going to be like, what's going on? It's going to be delicious. But let's just be honest. That's what an egg salad sandwich is. You know when you make an egg salad sandwich and if anyone walks by, they're going to be like, ew, that was. This is gross.

[Hank]

I would like one that said savory tomato pie. That would be a good one. Yep. Just fresh mixed fruit would be a really good hat. Maybe for, like a big bachelor party. It all share different ones of those hats. One that just says soft drinks. I'm Just looking at the menu right now of Augusta champion, Augusta national, and then one. How about one that just says domestic beer?

[PFT Commenter]

That would be cool.

[Hank]

The domestic beer hat, I think, might be the best one in the non egg salad division. To wear on a hat. I don't. I think it's funny that. That golf people are like, we need to shrink the game because these people wear stupid hats to our tournaments.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. I mean, it's. It's gatekeeping in a different. In a different form. I don't know. I think people should get to do whatever they want. Love whatever they want.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

If they. If. If the style looks stupid, they'll just look stupid. Now I do their own choice as a human being. If they want to wear a hat that looks stupid, let them wear a hat that looks stupid.

[Hank]

I do think that there should be more places, not less that we go to where they do. The master's rules of, like, confiscating your cell phones.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

No technology. I. I think that people actually crave that right now.

[PFT Commenter]

Yes.

[Hank]

I think if you had, like, a concert. A concert venue, and they made you do that before the bands went on, I think people would actually look forward to going to that venue. I think if there. Even if there was a bar, if there was like, just like.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, absolutely.

[Hank]

Like a good sports bar or a good, like, nice upscale bar, and they're like, hey, put your phones in, you know, the, like, little comedy bags. Yeah, put them in there. You're not allowed to have your phone out in this bar. I actually think a lot of people go, is.

[PFT Commenter]

Did I hear, like, Chick Fil A is doing something like that, that if you don't look at your phone, you get a free ice cream or something. Look that up. I think. I think there's something. My question, though, to you would be, would anyone attend Coachella if they confiscated their phone? No.

[Hank]

No.

[PFT Commenter]

It's like Coachella actually is the reverse of the Masters.

[Hank]

A mandatory phone.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. I. I think maybe this is just. Someone told me this, and I. No phone challenge. Is it really. Is it real? Someone told me this, and then I just. I'm in a big mood of just whatever people tell me.

[Hank]

I just believe.

[Max]

Select Chick Fil A locations are offering a free small cone to customers who participate in the cell phone coupe challenge.

[PFT Commenter]

I like this. That's more places you do it.

[Hank]

Like if you had. You know how like, late. Late summer, you start to get some of the. Some of the theme days at MLB ballparks.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Like Bark at the park.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

If there was no cell phone day.

[PFT Commenter]

This is, like, my idea of week. Yeah.

[Hank]

Your idea of what?

[PFT Commenter]

No replay week in. In sports, where we could just start. Just start doing stuff like that, where it's like we. The NBA says, hey, for an entire week, we're just not gonna have any instant replay.

[Hank]

Yeah. I think if you told people ahead of time, hey, this is the non cell phone day at our ballpark, I think you would actually get a lot of people that want to go to it. Definitely.

[PFT Commenter]

The other ones were how Tong Lee, who had a 10, who froze out Scotty. What was that at 16, 13. Oh, yeah, he was. He putted it into the water. He was in the bushes looking for his ball. He also apparently had food poisoning or some type of diarrhea incident because he said he went to the toilet last night a lot of times. And this morning when I got to the golf course and was still feeling really bad and I was living in the toilet, do you think that's a

[E]

way to 1% whoop recovery?

[Hank]

Oh, damn.

[E]

And then whoop was using that as, like, promotion, which I found a little bit interesting.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

He is the. He is the man, though. Remember, he's the one with the. On his wedges, it says, hao Tong is the most handsome man in China.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

It's pretty cool.

[Hank]

I. I think that's why he kept hitting the ball over and over again in the woods.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Because he's probably taking a. At the time.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, my God.

[Hank]

Now, when I saw this. Hank, maybe you can. You can answer my question, because I had a golf rules question for you. Why didn't he just say, I can't find my ball?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. What is that? What happens? Because, like, unplayed me, I do a breakfast ball on the.

[E]

On the 12th hole.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[E]

Or on the 13th hole.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Because if you say. If you have spotters, though, Right. But he was, like, inside of trees. I don't think they had spotters. Like, underneath the trees. If he hit.

[Max]

I don't know why I did that. I don't know why.

[Hank]

I swear.

[PFT Commenter]

To try to find the rule. And he typed in breakfast ball.

[Hank]

Yeah. Because it sounds delicious.

[PFT Commenter]

Breakfast.

[Hank]

It sounds delicious. What is that? Like, dark chocolate chips melted with.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, God. Little ice cream balls.

[Hank]

Some chia seeds in there. It sounds like, like, a one that you can put in a Ziploc and carry around with you all day. Some granola in there.

[Max]

I didn't mean to do that.

[PFT Commenter]

I didn't mean to do that.

[Hank]

Maybe put, like, some caramel and then a little bit of Sea salt on the outside penalty.

[PFT Commenter]

It's like a ob.

[Hank]

If you can't find your ball. If you can't find your ball.

[PFT Commenter]

Back to the te.

[E]

Unplayable.

[Hank]

Yeah, you. You can go back to where you hit your first shot. And it's a one stroke penalty, right?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. So why didn't he do that?

[Hank]

He should have done that.

[E]

I think he probably thought he could, he could make it out.

[Hank]

Cuz like, if I'm in that deep, deep stuff, I'm going to look for it, but then I'm not going to look very hard for it.

[E]

You're a looker.

[PFT Commenter]

You're.

[E]

You're, you're, you're a searcher.

[Hank]

I am. I'm a look. You are. Of a May. Put down a quote card, please. You're a looker.

[PFT Commenter]

From Hank Lockwood on the golf course in small text. Any other. Oh, Justin. Justin Rose. Feel bad for him. He now has four top three finishes at the Masters. Only Greg Norman has more. With out a win with six.

[Hank]

It's hard to feel bad for guys like that. And that's why it was hard for me to feel bad for Rory, too. Because if you finish second place at Augusta, you're going home with like, what, 2 million bucks? $1.5 million.

[E]

You can't play forever.

[PFT Commenter]

Can't play forever. You don't get the green jacket, you don't get to go to the dinner. You gotta win one.

[Hank]

Yeah, I guess.

[PFT Commenter]

And he's also like 45, so it's, it's a little sad when, when he's at the tail end of his career and he's, I mean, four top chances. Yeah, Four top three finishes is brutal. Yeah. The last two years is pain.

[E]

And like, him and Rory, they're, you know, Ryder cup teammates, friends, but it's like you must kind of resent them.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, yeah.

[Hank]

Rory, bad friend.

[E]

Yeah, definitely.

[PFT Commenter]

Bad friend. For sure.

[Hank]

I would say so.

[PFT Commenter]

Bad friend for sure. Rory. I did, I did like Rory's speech afterwards. He was very gracious and talking about his parents, and I think he seems like a nice guy. I'm not a fan, but he seems like a very nice guy. Can't say a lot of bad things about Rory. Did he. Except for the carbon footprint, did he

[Hank]

speed out of the parking lot afterwards and almost run over a reporter like he did?

[PFT Commenter]

So slow. Yeah, he also. Did you see the, the, the, the dust up with Scotty and the reporter? People were making a big deal out of that. I defend Scotty. I don't care.

[Hank]

So the dust up Was because Scotty said, like, the reporter asked him what they think his round should have been implying. That, like, he left some shots out there.

[PFT Commenter]

He shot 65 that day.

[Hank]

And. And he goes, that's a terrible question.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, awful.

[Hank]

I. It might be a bad question.

[PFT Commenter]

He also might not like the reporter. Change your face, reporter. Right. I don't know who asked the question that would.

[Hank]

You know what?

[PFT Commenter]

Why don't you come up? Why don't you? If Scotty doesn't like you, don't ask the question. Dude.

[Hank]

I. I might. I might agree with Scotty Shuffler on this one. If you shoot a 65 and someone's like, how mad are you that your score wasn't better? Yeah, I just.

[PFT Commenter]

I'd be like, the problem with Scotty,

[Hank]

like, you, dude, you couldn't be. You couldn't break 120 here.

[PFT Commenter]

He kind of answered the question after, like, he. Someone else answered the question. Oh, it was Jason Sobel. Yeah. Listen, I don't know what the beef is. If there is a beef. But if there's a beef, you, Jason Sobel or Ride or Die with Scotty. I mean, I would love Scottie Scheffler for life just by the fact that he watches Stu Finer say some of the most outrageous shit of all time.

[Hank]

After church.

[PFT Commenter]

After church or before church.

[Hank]

Sometimes I think what we got to do is, like, for major golf tournaments, there should be a special episode of Advisors. Knowing that Scotty needs to watch up,

[PFT Commenter]

we could just make a one of

[Hank]

one episode for him on Scott.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, just send him an episode.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Imagine what Stu would say on that.

[E]

I just remembered we recorded. I helped Stu record. I don't know why he was here when he was doing the voiceover for the Ryder Cup.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[E]

And I believe he made a video for the US Team privately.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh.

[E]

Where he was just going off on Rory.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, I love it. Oh, man, I would like to hear that video.

[E]

I gotta see if I can.

[PFT Commenter]

Do you have that video?

[E]

I think I do. That would be a great video player.

[Hank]

Come on.

[PFT Commenter]

For the people.

[Hank]

I mean. Do it. Yeah. Doing a single man episode of Advisors just to get him pumped up on a major Sunday would be like, you know that Scotty Scheffler is not going to lose a major championship if he's got Stu telling him to lick clip at. At 5:15 in the morning.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, yeah. Just screaming at a meat ass, eat ass. Go Rory. He'd say it all. He'd say it all. All right, so another masters in the books. Fun time. Wish it was a wish we had a playoff. That's all we wanted because it was so he was flirting with it. That ball not spit. That ball not spinning at all on Hank, you're the, you're the course expert. 15, 16, 15 was insane. And then the announcers afterwards being like it should have spun. He hit it wrong and ah, he around so close.

[Hank]

Like maybe I am upset at Augusta getting nerfed and not in the way that like dude perfect went out there with a bunch of like blow guns or whatever. I'm, I'm pissed because I feel like that ball in years past goes back into the creek.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, but they like, hey listen Augusta, they like it how they like it. Okay, let's, we're going to talk some more Masters with Scott Van Pelt, who is at Augusta. Before we do that, we're going to do some national sports podcasts. And before we do that, quick ad. Lucy. Lucy's the obvious choice for the true nicotine pouch connoisseurs. That's why the official nicotine pouch partner of Barstool Sports. Every other pouch is the same. Lucy breakers are the only ones doing it differently to give you the longest lasting flavor in pouches. Lucy pouches go up to 12 milligram strength and have a unique shape that feels great. Lucy's in stores nationwide now or get Lucy delivered to you ASAP on apps like DoorDash and GoPuff. Lucy's the only pouch that delivers long lasting, on demand flavor. Find a store near you at Lucy Co stores or get it shipped with 20% off your first order at Lucy Co PMT using code PMT. Lucy products are only for adults of legal age and every customer's age Verified Warning. This product contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical. We also are brought to you by our friends at DraftKings. The NBA playoffs are here in DraftKings Sportsbook, an official sports betting partner. The NBA boosts every game day the whole postseason. When the lights get brightest, the best players in the world show you exactly who they are. Playoff stars turn it up round by round. And DraftKings turns it up too, with a profit boost available every single game day from the first round all the way to the Finals. New Sportsbook customers bet just $5. And if your bet wins, you'll get 300 in bonus bets instantly. Download the DraftKings sportsbook app. Use code Take so you're ready for the moment. That's code take. Turn 5 bucks into 300 in bonus bets if your bet wins. In partnership with DraftKings, the Crown is yours.

[Zach]

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[PFT Commenter]

Wager tax pass through.

[Zach]

May apply in Illinois, 21 and over in most states. Void in Ontario, restrictions apply. Vet must win to receive bonus bets which expire in seven days. Minimum odds required. For additional terms and responsible gaming resources, see sportsbook.draftkings. limited time offer.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay, let's talk some national sports podcasts. NBA playoffs are set.

[Hank]

Some NBA coaching news.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Breaking news.

[PFT Commenter]

Where do we want to start? You want to start with that Doc Rivers.

[Hank]

Google them. Google them, Big cat.

[PFT Commenter]

This is the least, least surprising news of all time.

[Hank]

Doc Rivers is departing as head coach of the Milwaukee bucks. Sources tell ESPN after a 3750 season, the Bucks will embark on their third coaching search in the last three years. Now, it didn't say that he was fired.

[PFT Commenter]

No.

[Hank]

So that Doc is departing.

[PFT Commenter]

Departing. He actually said on Dan Patrick show like a few weeks ago that he's going to beat Dan Patrick to retirement. So I think Doc knew it was happening.

[E]

He got in the hall of Fame and then just.

[Hank]

Yeah, yeah, I'm out. He is the. We're talking about Dusty May last week. He is the original constantly horse basketball head coach.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Like you'll. He's never had a full voice. The Google me thing that he tried to do to his own team a couple weeks ago. Yeah, that was. That's an interesting move because I think if you Google Doc Rivers the first things that you find pro. I'm going to guess that Game 7 is somewhere in the first sentence of his Google.

[PFT Commenter]

He'll probably get a job as an exec somewhere.

[Hank]

Yeah. I think like some shitty team would be like we want you to be our Brad Stevens.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. You got to make Doc. Doc Rivers say no. And he will definitely say yes.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Well, if you give him that, if you give him that job title, Doc

[Hank]

will make you say no to hiring him.

[PFT Commenter]

Yes. Yes. And then we had the. Yeah. The regular season is, is finally complete. Finally we had. Do you guys. So I, I looked this up and this is, this was crazy. Did you guys see the, the all time like once in a generation Haley's Comet tank off on Friday night all time game the Jazz played the Grizzlies and both teams have been tanking for a long time and the Grizzlies needed to Lose. It was a must lose game for both of them. The Grizzlies started four guys on a 10 day contract and a two way player as well. They had. The Grizzlies lineup had one first rounder in it and the rest were undrafted or second rounders. Derek Whitehead was the 1 first rounder and I mentioned Derek Whitehead because In the first 14 minutes of the game he scored 16 points and then the Grizzlies benched him until they were in. It was like a three point game in the, in the start of the second quarter. The Grizzlies then benched him till. Till the fourth quarter when they were down by 50. He was too hot. We also had three triple doubles in this game, one of which was actually a quadruple double. And it was Jermaine my Shaq. Uh, he had 13, 15, 14 and 10 turnovers. He played all 48 minutes. He was a minus 46 with a triple double. Both the triple doubles for the Jazz came from their bench players. They played one. The Grizzlies played six guys. The Jazz played seven guys.

[Hank]

It would be really interesting.

[PFT Commenter]

It was unbelievable.

[Hank]

It'd be really interesting to do like a. Where are they now of guys that got minutes in like March and early April in NBA seasons like three years ago?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

And just see like how many of the guys ever get brought back because it's, it's gotten to the point where it's just, it's blatant, but there's nothing that the NBA can do about it.

[PFT Commenter]

It was the first time in NBA history there was three triple doubles in a game. And it was the most meaningless game ever. We had Kevin Love trying to come into the game and then being told to sit down. It was because the Jazz were so pissed they won.

[Hank]

Guys foul. Well, well, yeah, lead. Yeah, I say that there's no solution to it. There actually there might be a solution. Did you see the NBA Reddit post from last week?

[PFT Commenter]

No.

[Hank]

About how to solve tanking. Okay, this is as close as I've seen to a viable long term solution. Dynamic beer pricing. Ooh, this is from Twitter or. Sorry, Reddit user killingifornia6969. The NBA mandates that all beers cost $10 for all teams at the start of the season. Teams can increase prices by 35 cents per win and must decrease them by 20 cents per loss. So looking at the current standings right now, one beer at a Oklahoma City Thunder game would cost 22.70.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Hank]

One beer at a Washington Wizards game would cost 10 cents I love that. So it's like you, yeah, you can, you can tank if you want, but you're not going to make any money off beer sales.

[PFT Commenter]

It should be all concessions.

[Hank]

And let me tell you, I think that Wizards fans deserve to have 10 cent beers for every game. Yeah, I think they need beer goggles on to be like, damn, that guy looks like an NBA player.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, no, this, this would absolutely work.

[Hank]

I'm into it.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, it should be all concessions too.

[Hank]

All concessions, sure.

[PFT Commenter]

It's like if you're going to put out such a shit product, you know, the, like a family of four should be able to go to a Wizards game and get hammered and get hammered and eat dinner for $2.

[Hank]

I agree. Yeah. This is the best, best solution that I've ever seen.

[PFT Commenter]

I like that a lot. So we, yeah, the, the NBA. I, I, I agree, Hank. The, finally it's over. This was, this was the worst regular season.

[E]

It was drag.

[PFT Commenter]

They just, they just dragging to the finish line and I'm excited for the NBA playoffs, but they just, they ruined their product this season in terms of how, how half the league was just completely tanking for basically the whole season and just non competitive. Like some of these. I was looking at the points threads the other night. It was like every Single game was minus 24. It was crazy. And, and, and, and they were covering because teams are so actively trying to lose. I mean, like I said, the Jazz Grizzlies game was they started six guys. The one guy who shot well, they sat immediately because they're like, yeah, you can't play this well. That's how bad the product has come.

[E]

So what's the, the promo Wind Horse cut for it?

[PFT Commenter]

No.

[E]

Oh, he cut a, he cut an all time like promo. Like it was like they're going into game seven.

[PFT Commenter]

I love that. Wendy's the best.

[Hank]

Very cool. Yeah, I do wonder where they find some of these guys. Like how do they. If you're a GM and you're actively trying to tank, like what is the, the process like for elevating guys? It's just G league and signing guys. But like you want guys that will not help you win. I want to know like actually the nuts and bolts of, of how they make the decisions of who's going to be on an NBA roster for like the last three weeks of a season.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. And they just, and they, and they, they play six guys and they make sure that everyone's tired and it's a bunch of guys that, that are not NBA worthy and they can't win a game. It's. It's just terrible.

[Hank]

So, Max, how are we feeling about the Sixers?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, so the. The. The playoffs set. Obviously the play in is happening this week. We have the Sixers playing the Magic on Wednesday. Max, where did you find that?

[Max]

I couldn't. Memes told me that right before.

[PFT Commenter]

He said what? It's not Wednesday? I think it is Wednesday. Either way, the Sixers are playing the Magic for the seven seed, which would then face off against the Celtics.

[E]

The. The app I'm looking at says magic sixers, 6:30. Tuesday.

[PFT Commenter]

Tuesday. Oh.

[Scott Van Pelt]

What. What are you.

[PFT Commenter]

They're fighting in the booth. It's a fake name. Rod Bone Boone. No. Rod Boone. Did you get caught? I might have got boned. Although the Canadiens are playing the Flyers on Tuesday night.

[Max]

Looks like a real guy.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. Rod Boone. So they move due to Philadelphia winning in leapfrogging Orlando in the standings. This is a conflict in Philadelphia on Tuesday because there's Flyers game. Hornets hosts Miami Heat on Tuesday instead of Wednesday. I see it on ESPN as well.

[Max]

Max, for Wednesday.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Scott Van Pelt]

All right.

[Max]

Justice for memes.

[PFT Commenter]

Justice for memes.

[Max]

Yeah, Wednesday.

[PFT Commenter]

So everyone who's listening right now has to root their asses off for the Philadelphia 76.

[Hank]

We're not like those Sixers, dude. Josh Harris.

[Max]

The Celtics are going to be like minus a thousand to win this.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, but Max, fodder.

[Hank]

This is Max, not. You said they're going to win in five. No disrespect. Max, you sound like a loser right now. Yeah, the Sixers aren't good. Get excited, dude.

[E]

They're playoff team.

[Max]

Big Head did this exact same thing when the Bulls were in the play last year.

[PFT Commenter]

That was different because the Bulls different. Well, no, they actually. It is because the Bulls never got the seven seed. They never got.

[Max]

That means nothing.

[PFT Commenter]

No, they never hosted the first play. That we always would have to host a game. We'd have to go to Atlanta or Miami maybe. There's one year we got. Yeah, there was one year, but I think we lost both of those games. We just always lose them playing.

[Hank]

Max, everybody said last year that the. The Knicks had no chance against the Celtics.

[Max]

It was way different. And Beat's probably not even going to play.

[Hank]

Why you say that?

[PFT Commenter]

No, I mean, you're right, Max. I do agree with you. I want it for the fight. The plan. I do not like the plan because I think it's that. And now the Sixers would make the playoffs right now if it weren't for playing. I think it's bullshit. That the ninth and tenth teams. Like, we don't need to. Especially in a league where you're trying to get even half the teams to be competitive. The ninth and 10th seed, like, they're not going to win.

[Max]

Absolutely not.

[PFT Commenter]

But the Sixers might.

[Max]

No, they're not.

[PFT Commenter]

Dude, are you scared? This is pretend. No.

[E]

Pretend to be scared of the Sixers.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Like, reverse it.

[E]

I mean, if a beat had an appendix, who knows?

[PFT Commenter]

But, yeah, true. Could be interesting, right? This could be an interesting series.

[Hank]

But that's. Just think about it this way, Hank. That's one less thing that you can

[E]

get into the playoffs. I mean, the next. Last year, it's like you can't take teams for granted.

[PFT Commenter]

Anything could happen.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[E]

You can't overlook any opponent. They're in the playoffs for a reason. They're a good team, good organization, gotta take care of business.

[Max]

You couldn't even. You couldn't even say that without stuttering.

[PFT Commenter]

He's trying to do the biz. Oh, yeah.

[Max]

Got it.

[PFT Commenter]

It's okay.

[Hank]

But I mean, you're in.

[PFT Commenter]

You're in rage mode right now. You don't.

[Max]

No, I'm not. I'm not.

[PFT Commenter]

No. But you're, like, teetering on rage mode.

[Hank]

What about playoff P? You're telling me all about playoff P and how great he's been recently.

[Max]

Yeah, he's prime. Playoff P is back.

[PFT Commenter]

What if you win game one?

[Max]

We've won game one before to the Celtics, but we were actually good against the magic.

[PFT Commenter]

I mean. Oh, then you'd be. Then you play the Celtics. And then what if you won the other game one?

[Max]

I already. I already answered that.

[PFT Commenter]

You could win multiple game ones in one week.

[Max]

You guys are.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Playing's. I'm. I actually have your back, Max.

[Hank]

No, you got this. Embiid will come back for my. I'm gonna officially say Embiid will be back by game three of the series against the Celtics.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Hank]

Then you got maxi, you got playoff

[PFT Commenter]

P. You just gotta win. You gotta have one playoff P game. Josh Harris steal one there. Then you get a couple Embiid games and one maxi game, and you're good. That's four right there. Two Embiid games, one maxi game, one playoff P game.

[Hank]

Yeah, dude, you got.

[PFT Commenter]

That's pretty simple.

[Hank]

You got this so simple.

[Max]

I'm fired up.

[PFT Commenter]

You fired up?

[Max]

I'm fired up.

[PFT Commenter]

I'm flying fired up.

[Hank]

Well, that's. The other facts mean you were fighting for. For a hockey playoffs.

[Max]

That's true. And I love hockey.

[Hank]

You love hockey. So Much.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I love.

[Max]

I'm. I'm the biggest hockey guy.

[PFT Commenter]

So, yeah, the. The plans. We'll. We'll get Resil or Wind Horse on. In. In a couple shows, talk some NBA playoffs.

[Hank]

Do you want to make a prediction? Like, what. What. What cities has Wind Horse secured his hotel rooms in? And then we can check with him.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay, I'll say Celtics, Boston.

[Hank]

Boston. I think he. I think maybe New York.

[PFT Commenter]

I don't think so. I think he might have just only done Boston.

[Hank]

No, no.

[PFT Commenter]

I feel like he might.

[Hank]

I think New York and Boston, Oklahoma, San Antonio and Denver.

[PFT Commenter]

So it's just. What's the. What's the fifth one that he's made in. In the East? Like, that's. That's really all. The only question.

[Hank]

The question is because it's definitely those

[PFT Commenter]

three in the west and it's Boston, and it's just. Who. Who's the other. May Philly.

[Hank]

May Philly. I mean, this is the year a lot of people were saying. Pundits were saying going into the season. I heard that this is the year for the Sixers to win. You got. You got Tatum knocked out with the Achilles. You got. You got Halliburton out for the season in Indy, out of the East. Like, this is the year that the Sixers should make a run. Now Cunningham, he's out, too. So it's like things are wide open for the Philadelphia 76ers.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, you did say. Or pundits did say that. You know what it is, Hank? Just dawn on me, he's gonna use technicality. He's gonna say that Boston's the only one he made in the east because he'll stay at his mom's house when he goes to Cleveland. That's exactly what's gonna happen. So he technically has Cleveland as well, but I bet you it's. It can't. Is it the. Is it the Celtics? East east is theirs to win. They have to win it, right? Yeah.

[E]

I mean, they're not the number one cbs, but set the.

[PFT Commenter]

Set the bar. Anything other than getting to the NBA Finals is a disappointment.

[Hank]

Yeah, for sure. I think anything but. But winning the NBA Finals.

[PFT Commenter]

I agree.

[E]

You don't come to the playoffs to want to lose.

[PFT Commenter]

Who would do that? He's not even paying attention.

[Max]

I'm just not participating in this memes.

[PFT Commenter]

Zach, you want to chime in? You. You nicked up. I'm fired up. I can't believe Hank even just said that. What? They can't beat the Knicks, and we're just starting it all over again. Ooh, we're gonna get Bing Bong again. Good. The same thing. Let's just do the same thing.

[E]

Bring it.

[Hank]

Same thing.

[PFT Commenter]

Bing Bong is Hank.

[Hank]

Does he have the same mentality he had last year?

[PFT Commenter]

The way he's talking right now?

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

And the team was significantly better last year. Are you worried about the Hawks at all? Yes. Okay. That doesn't.

[Hank]

Hawks.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Hawk.

[PFT Commenter]

Hawk. Hawks are very good basketball team. You weren't worried about the Raptors? Not a chance.

[Hank]

Mac or Memes. Can I ask you a question?

[PFT Commenter]

Yes, sir.

[Hank]

I have watched a Grand total of 0 Atlanta Hawks games this year. Can you tell me why the Hawks are a good basketball team? Why? They're dangerous.

[PFT Commenter]

The Hawks traded away. The Hawks had a really good off season.

[Zach]

Got a bunch of guys.

[PFT Commenter]

They traded away all those guys, pretty much revamped their entire team, and now they're just playing like elite basketball.

[Hank]

Got it.

[Zach]

That's it.

[Hank]

Got it.

[PFT Commenter]

They're just super athletic, they're super fast, and they can shoot the three.

[Hank]

I'm kind of excited to see the Hornets in the play in. Yeah. Does that make. I know the plan doesn't really count, but the Hornets in terms of like the roster right now. And they're young, they're fun.

[PFT Commenter]

Absolutely.

[Hank]

They could be a fun also. It's just like I can't remember the last time the Hornets were good. So it's kind of cool seeing that.

[PFT Commenter]

And I'm just very excited for the Western Conference playoffs because the.

[Scott Van Pelt]

The.

[PFT Commenter]

The Thunder, spurs and Nuggets.

[Scott Van Pelt]

It.

[PFT Commenter]

That's going to be awesome. And maybe even throw in the rock. I mean, Timberwolves are fun too. I don't think the Lakers. Unless Luca's leg is just better because of the trip.

[Hank]

Yeah. He's getting back.

[PFT Commenter]

It might be, but yeah, I'm. I'm excited. I'm excited for NBA playoffs. There's nothing better than playoffs.

[Max]

I took a future on the Sixers.

[PFT Commenter]

You did? Just now.

[Hank]

I like that.

[Max]

Yeah, you got. I gotta at least get a little

[Hank]

and show some love. What was the odds?

[E]

It was.

[Hank]

It was good.

[Max]

It was a good number.

[PFT Commenter]

What?

[Scott Van Pelt]

It was good.

[Max]

Number 50 to 1 just to win the East.

[Hank]

I might ride Max.

[Max]

50 to 1.

[PFT Commenter]

There you go. Did you not. Did you ever put another future on?

[Hank]

I did on. On the Celtics, but then I cashed out because.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Cried.

[PFT Commenter]

But then. Remember Hank called you a coward.

[Hank]

No, he was crying.

[PFT Commenter]

But you said you had something else planned for him.

[Hank]

Yeah, but. No, I. I'm gonna bet with Max. I'm gonna. I'M gonna stand with my guy. I want to root with Max.

[Max]

Just gotta get Embiid back.

[Hank]

Max and I are we always butt heads. You know, all our teams are always rivals with each other. This is a good opportunity. I want to support Max in his time of need.

[PFT Commenter]

That's nice.

[Hank]

Let's go, Sixers.

[PFT Commenter]

That's really nice.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Thanks.

[Max]

Pft.

[Hank]

Yeah. Six up.

[Max]

Six up.

[PFT Commenter]

Let's have some six.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yeah, let's have some six. That's pretty good.

[Hank]

Congrats on the six.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. Okay.

[Hank]

Any other hot, steamy, steamy six.

[PFT Commenter]

Any other national sports podcast topics before we do who's back? Anything? Hockey playoffs are gonna start.

[Hank]

Hockey players starting after I got an Internet.

[PFT Commenter]

Well, actually, hockey players starting this weekend. Next weekend is the. Is the weekend. And we'll have Biz and Wit and Yan's on all spring.

[Hank]

I've got an international sports podcast thing.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, okay.

[Hank]

Should we. Should we start caring a little bit about British soccer just for the next couple weeks? Because something very funny might happen.

[PFT Commenter]

Tottenham.

[Hank]

Tottenham.

[PFT Commenter]

Tottenham.

[Hank]

So Tottenham is in danger of being relegated?

[PFT Commenter]

They are if it ended right now.

[Hank]

Yeah. So I looked it up. They're about even odds to get relegated now. They are one of the six big teams in the. In the epl. They've got a massive payroll. They just built a new stadium like a decade ago for billions of dollars. It would be. I'm trying to think of like the NBA or NFL equivalent to this.

[PFT Commenter]

There isn't. Because we don't have relegation.

[Hank]

We don't have relegation.

[PFT Commenter]

It would be like.

[Hank]

It would be like if the. The Bills.

[PFT Commenter]

No, I think the only way to do it would be like if. If you said if Ohio State started playing in the Mac. Yeah, that would be what it. No disrespect to the Mac, but like, that's. That's what. It's crazy. It makes no Sense.

[Hank]

They have 134 million quid payroll. I think it's quid. That's probably the unit they use over pounds.

[PFT Commenter]

It's loonies, I believe.

[Hank]

Loonies. Yeah. 134 loonies on that roster. A bunch of their players are playing in the World cup for their respective countries, but they just suck and they can't win anything. And Hurricane. Yeah, well, I don't know. I don't know who's on the roster. Right. I think Harry Kane's on the roster. No, no, no, no.

[PFT Commenter]

It hasn't been for a couple years.

[Hank]

Okay. Not Harry Kane.

[PFT Commenter]

Yep.

[Hank]

I don't watch epl.

[PFT Commenter]

That's okay.

[Hank]

I'M I'm. I'm excited about the idea of a team that has this much invest in it potentially getting relegated.

[PFT Commenter]

Yes.

[Hank]

That'd be funny for.

[PFT Commenter]

That is awesome.

[Hank]

It'd be funny to see what happens with the ownership group. And it's the reason why American sports will never adopt the relegation model.

[PFT Commenter]

Absolutely.

[Hank]

Because the. The people that would own the teams would stand to lose so much money. But Tottenham Hotspur, they're a team that was going to be in the Super League just a few years ago.

[E]

They came with one name. Souza.

[Hank]

Souza.

[E]

There's no last name. He's 19, so he's got to be awesome.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, yeah.

[Hank]

But. So that's what I'm rooting for in. In soccer before we get to the World Cup. I think it'd be very funny if. If Tottenham got relegated.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. No, there's been a. It's been a pretty crazy fall from grace here with how bad they've been playing.

[Hank]

Would they then have to. They'd have to play, obviously, a championship schedule or a second division, whatever that is. Is that the championship.

[PFT Commenter]

Yes.

[Hank]

Yeah. The championship schedule where they'd now be going to. To places and stadiums that have, like, 5,000 seats. Yeah, that would rock. I think it'd be very funny.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. No, those are still big clubs, like,

[E]

those are still big Ish clubs like the Wrexham.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. Is that the same? I don't know if Wrexham is all the way. Is Wrexham all the way up to the Champions Championship League? That's the second. That's the league below the epl. I don't know if they're all the way up there, but. Yeah, it's crazy. It's absolutely crazy. And Tottenham was in, like, they were in the Champions League not too long. Did they play in the Champions League? I don't know if they might have played in the Champions League this year, which is crazy. I think that might have. I think they might have been in the Champions League this year, but either way, it's nuts. It's absolutely nuts. I think maybe last year actually, that they were in the Champions League. It's a crazy fall. Fall from grace for them.

[Hank]

Yeah, I want to see. I. I want to know more about what happened to them this year, because I asked some of the guys around the office that are EPL fans, like, can you describe what happened? And it was just all some form of, like. You know how, like, American soccer fans start to speak with a British accent when they talk about soccer?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

They're like, it's just a bottling. They're Just bottling. They bottled it.

[PFT Commenter]

They just bottled so many times, over and over.

[Hank]

It's been bottled.

[PFT Commenter]

What do you find in it? What do you find in there?

[Max]

I'm trying to figure out if they're in the Champions League.

[PFT Commenter]

They. They might have been early. Oh, yeah, they were.

[Max]

They're in.

[E]

So they.

[PFT Commenter]

They're out, though, because I think we're past the round of 16. But they were.

[Max]

Yeah, that counts.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. They. They. This is gonna be very embarrassing. The only reason I don't want to get involved is I feel like they're gonna find a way to pull through. Yeah. And that will suck.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

I want to get involved and be like, fuck.

[Hank]

I mean, there's just so much money at stake that it's hard to believe

[PFT Commenter]

that I want to. I want to see it happen, but I don't want to see. I don't want to see us get embarrassed and have them be able to turn it on us.

[Hank]

They probably will.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Who?

[PFT Commenter]

Pull up the table again. Pull up the. The current table right now.

[Hank]

They got to play the Wolves.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. Leeds Everton. Everton's bad, too. All right, so. So they're playing the Wolves, who are last. So that should be.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

I don't know. I don't know. I'm trying to do quick math here. I'm gonna say. I'm gonna say they're not gonna get relegated.

[E]

EPL rigged.

[Hank]

West Ham is also involved. I'm gonna say the relegation discussion.

[PFT Commenter]

They're not going to get relevant.

[Hank]

It's probably gonna be west having a nice year. West Ham is probably going to get.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Relegated.

[PFT Commenter]

Not in them forests. Okay. I like that, though. This is a good topic.

[Scott Van Pelt]

We'll.

[PFT Commenter]

We'll keep.

[Hank]

We'll.

[PFT Commenter]

We will be updating it. And by updating it, Zach, can you please let us know?

[Zach]

I can do that.

[PFT Commenter]

Send a group text every single time Tottenham plays.

[Hank]

And I was talking soccer.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Zach]

What do we think of Tottenham?

[Hank]

The shit in it.

[Zach]

What do we think of shite.

[PFT Commenter]

Wait, Tantam. Are you.

[Zach]

What's up?

[PFT Commenter]

Are you an EPL fan?

[Zach]

I dabble.

[PFT Commenter]

And what's your team?

[Zach]

Chelsea. We're six on table right now.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay. Nice. Zach, why did you chime in?

[Zach]

I did. What do we think of Tottenham,

[Hank]

Tottenham? There we go. Is that an actual chant?

[PFT Commenter]

Let's talking soccer, yeah? Yes, sir.

[Hank]

I like it.

[Zach]

It's a good chant.

[PFT Commenter]

How's Chelsea doing? The six. So they got six. Are they gonna climb up?

[Zach]

I don't. I don't believe so.

[PFT Commenter]

Are you watching?

[Zach]

Lost four, last five. What's up?

[PFT Commenter]

Are you watching games?

[Zach]

I'm more so in chat. My.

[PFT Commenter]

I do clips.

[Zach]

My little brother, he watches full games, gives me spark notes.

[PFT Commenter]

That's official.

[Zach]

The games are early. Some of the games are like, oh,

[PFT Commenter]

yeah, that's not you. Yeah.

[Zach]

You can't say it. I'll say it.

[Hank]

Zach, when is.

[PFT Commenter]

You can't be doing that.

[Hank]

When is Tottenham's next game?

[PFT Commenter]

That would be 2:00pm you want to say a day.

[Max]

Oh, 2:00pm Saturday.

[Hank]

Oh, okay.

[Max]

That's not Tottenham. That's Chelsea. We were talking Chelsea, to be fair.

[PFT Commenter]

But also just saying 2p.

[Hank]

Also, it's pronounced Tottenham.

[Max]

Well, I thought we were talking about timing wise to see if Zach.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, yeah, that makes sense.

[Hank]

And what city is Tottenham in?

[PFT Commenter]

Tottenham is in Manchester.

[Hank]

That's right.

[Zach]

The 18th.

[PFT Commenter]

The 18th, sir. Give me a day.

[Zach]

Oh, got you. Or Saturday, 11:30am against Brighton, 11:30s Central Time.

[PFT Commenter]

All right. So you will update.

[Zach]

Yes?

[Hank]

Okay.

[Zach]

I can do.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

All right. We're on Tottenham watch. We're on relegation watch.

[Hank]

And they're playing against Bright. Brighton.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, Brighton.

[Zach]

That's correct. Yes.

[PFT Commenter]

Of the Seagulls.

[Hank]

Can you tell me what I say about Brighton? Like, what up the brights. What do we see?

[Zach]

Bright up.

[Hank]

Come on, you Brights.

[Zach]

Brighton, if you got them.

[Hank]

Yeah. Brighton, if you got them. I like it.

[PFT Commenter]

I think. I think they're the.

[Hank]

Are they?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, they're the goals. The seagulls. You don't see a lot of seagulls in terms of. In terms of mascots, but that's. That's bright.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

And you know, there's a shitload of seagulls there.

[Hank]

That's the. The Albion.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Yeah, yeah. Good bird. Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay, let's do who's back of the week it is brought to you by our friends at Twisted T. Twisted tea is a refreshing hard iced tea made with real Brewed tea and 5% alcohol. Twisted tea is the perfect drink to keep the good times going all day and all season long. Whether you're hanging out at a friend's house, catching a game at the stadium or at the bar, day drinking with friends. Twisted tea is there to turn your day up a notch and make a good time a great time. We also have the Lefty Lockwood box ready to go. Hank's Lefty Lockwood twisted tee box. Go get it. Today. Original, beautiful half and half peach. All the twisted tea flavors are delicious. Weather is turning. It's twisted tea season. Grab a refreshing twisted tea today, Hank.

[E]

My who's back of the week is the Biebs.

[PFT Commenter]

Justin Bieber Cella, Bieber.

[E]

Chella.

[PFT Commenter]

I forgot that Justin Trudeau and Katy Perry were dating, like, the most hatable couple of all time.

[Hank]

But they're so relatable that they're at a concert together. Yeah, yeah.

[Max]

She had that shirt about vapes too.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

What it say?

[Max]

It said if I asked you, if I asked, hit your vape, Please say no. Or something like that.

[PFT Commenter]

Classic class.

[Hank]

That's very cool.

[PFT Commenter]

Classic.

[Hank]

It's very cool because she's like, what, 24, 23? How old is Katy Perry?

[Max]

She's old. I'm trying to. It said, please do not give me a rip of your vape, no matter what I say. And Katy Perry age, on the other hand.

[Hank]

Oh, she's 41.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay. Okay, cool. Okay.

[E]

Definitely goes in the running theme of. Of, you know, growing with the show and being washed. But I. I realized this weekend, like, there's nowhere that looks more appealing to be at than the Masters. And there's nowhere that looked less appealing to be at than Cella, than Coachella.

[PFT Commenter]

Cello is tough.

[E]

It just looks like. It looks like hell.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Yeah, I agree. I. I think it's probably my age, but the last five years, last six years, I've just. I don't like crowds anywhere. I just, like, don't like being in crowds.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

I'd rather just sit at home. Like, sitting at home is so much better than being a place that everybody wants to be in a crowd.

[PFT Commenter]

Sitting at home and listening to music rocks.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[E]

Yeah. I guess because he sold all of his. All his catalog. So there, I guess, might have been some technicalities with him not being able to perform old music. So he treated the concert like it was like a, you know, twitch streamer. He's just sitting on a laptop, pulling up old clips and then like, singing along to basically old clips of him singing songs. Very, very different concert.

[Hank]

It sounds like he might not have wanted to, like, pay a DJ or band to play with him.

[E]

Well, I don't think he was, like, a lot. I don't think he somehow doesn't have the rights to his own music, so he.

[Hank]

But he can be like.

[E]

If we did the. The live show, Our live show in la.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[E]

If we just pulled up Instagram clips of ourselves and just played those.

[PFT Commenter]

Not a bad idea.

[Hank]

Yeah, easy. 30 minutes.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. Cella. Not for. Not for any of us. We should send Zach as a correspondent next year. That actually would be good if he came back.

[Zach]

Max A is also in and memes.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, okay. Whole booth. I'll film Maxim. Zach will put On. I don't hate that idea.

[Hank]

Would you rather go to Cella or Burning Man?

[PFT Commenter]

They're totally different.

[Max]

For sure.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. Coachella, they couldn't be more different.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Although I sure Coach. Yeah. Coachella is like an influencer event.

[Zach]

Coachella, you get lost, you can find your way back. You get lost at Burning man, you might be out there forever.

[PFT Commenter]

We'll go in Palm. Palm Springs, California. Yes, sir. Yeah, it's like a beautiful place. Burning Man's middle of a desert, and you gotta.

[Hank]

Isn't Palm Springs in the middle of a desert?

[PFT Commenter]

I mean, it. A desert in Springs. It's like. It's a beautiful place right where people go on vacation. So I. I think Coachella is, like, very fancy glamping and all that. No one's. No one's roughing it at Coachella.

[Zach]

No.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, I saw. I saw my quarterback was there with the Kardashians, but I did also then.

[Hank]

That's cool. Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Someone. I laugh at this because it's like too much information. Shout out Ross Reed. He was on top of it. He said, kaleb's been going to Coachella on behalf of Neutrogena. Neutrogena for years now since his nil deal. When he goes, he sits in their section. Those Kardashian gender ladies also have partnership with that company. Let's wrap this up and keep it moving, folks. Shout out that guy. I saw the picture. I was like, oh, no. And then Ross Reed came to the rescue. He's like, dude, don't worry about it. Got it done. So Coachella. Bieber.

[E]

Bieber Cella.

[PFT Commenter]

Bieber Cella.

[Hank]

Is he back?

[E]

I think Biebs is back. I mean, the hype. People are hyped.

[PFT Commenter]

People are so hyped.

[Zach]

Beaver never left, though. You can't be back if you never left.

[PFT Commenter]

That's fair.

[E]

Didn't he, like, try and do a tour like, a year ago and couldn't sell tickets and had to cancel it?

[Zach]

Yeah, he did. He did run into a little bit of debt with Scooter Braun, but that's why you sell the Masters for 200 million.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, he just sold himself to get out of debt.

[Zach]

200. 200 million.

[PFT Commenter]

What are our Masters go for?

[Hank]

We're not allowed.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, that's a baller move. Okay. Pft.

[Hank]

Who's your. Who's back? My who's back is maybe Alexander Vechkin. Oh, he might be back. So I've been assuming that he's going to retire all season. I think a lot of people have been assuming that he's going to retire at the end of the season. And then today, the Caps played against the Penguins, beat the Penguins, three. Nothing. And the Penguins lined up in a cool gesture, they wanted to shake Ovi's hand because it might be the last time that they play him. And OVI waved them off the ice and said, no, go, go. Leave. Not accepting the final handshake. Wind horse, hands go up. Does that mean that Ov's coming back for another year next year? I think he might.

[PFT Commenter]

Whoa.

[Hank]

I think if we make the playoffs, he might be back next year.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, are you.

[Hank]

I'm excited about.

[PFT Commenter]

Are you close to making the playoffs?

[Hank]

Yeah. Well, if we win one game, if we beat the Blue Jackets, and then Max loses the next two games.

[PFT Commenter]

So Max would no longer be flyered up.

[Hank]

Max would have to play the Hurricanes. And then who else do you play?

[Max]

Canadians.

[Hank]

Yeah. So two good teams, and they're not

[Max]

playing for the Canadians. Might not be taking anything.

[PFT Commenter]

They're tanking.

[Hank]

It's resting.

[PFT Commenter]

Maybe positioning. Positioning is what they call it.

[Hank]

I like that.

[PFT Commenter]

It's not tanking in hockey. It's positioning.

[Max]

No, the Canadians are good playoff.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, playoff positioning for them. But who the Hurricanes would that be? That would be tanking. Or. No, I believe Hurricanes are good.

[Hank]

Hurricanes are awesome.

[PFT Commenter]

All right, so. Oh, yeah, the Hurricanes are really.

[Hank]

Hurricanes are maybe. Probably going to win the Stanley Cup.

[PFT Commenter]

I'm saying. Good seating, though.

[Hank]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

They're set. They're positioned. Carol, the Hurricanes are as positioned as you could get. They've been positioned.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Scott Van Pelt]

They're.

[Hank]

They're just chilling on right inside the Cape Verde Islands, just ready to strike. I think. I think that there's. I think there's a good. There is a 45 chance the Caps make the playoffs this year. And. Incorrect.

[PFT Commenter]

Wow.

[Max]

I said I think Max, but, I mean, there's. There's odds.

[PFT Commenter]

Yes.

[Max]

There are percentages.

[Hank]

I said. I said I think you're a point back.

[PFT Commenter]

And the Flyers have two games left.

[Hank]

Two games left against one game. We have one game. Yeah. There's a chance that we make the playoffs, and there's also a chance that OVI comes back. And I realized this, this last week because he's played pretty good, and it would just be awesome to see the Caps play against the Penguins in the playoffs one more time.

[PFT Commenter]

That'd be great. He's all flyed up, though.

[Hank]

He's flyered up. But you. There's plenty of time to be fired up.

[Max]

Three things have to.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Percentages alone.

[Max]

That's not 40.

[Hank]

You need to be focused on having.

[Max]

You need to win. The Flyers need to lose and the Flyers need to lose.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Max]

How was that?

[PFT Commenter]

50.

[Max]

50. That's three things.

[Hank]

Three things have to happen.

[PFT Commenter]

I know some people like the setup for the NHL playoffs. I think it's so stupid.

[Max]

I don't get it at all.

[PFT Commenter]

Well, I get it. I just don't stupid. It's stupid because you just have teams that shouldn't be playing in the first round. Playing in the first round. Like the, the. The Western Conference, the Central. All three teams are awesome. And they're going to. And the Stars are going to play the Wild in the first round.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

I don't like crazy. It makes no sense.

[Hank]

I don't like it either.

[PFT Commenter]

Like I get it. It makes it so there's rivalries and you know, you're playing familiar teams. But I just don't understand how you can have an entire 82 game season and then have the second and third best teams in the Western Conference have to play in the first round.

[Hank]

It's a fucked up system. But in this case I would. I would love to see a Caps Penguins first round season. Yeah. Just because it would. It would just be a complete nostalgia fest for me. But I think Max, I personally think there's a 5045 chance the Caps make the playoffs. You can think what you want. You should be focused on.

[Max]

You should be focused thinking.

[PFT Commenter]

You should be focused on statistical.

[Max]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

On having 600 statistical. But let them think.

[Max]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

You know, 110 at Augusta and the Caps can make the playoffs.

[Hank]

I said no. I said 45% chance the caps make the playoffs.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yeah, there's still.

[Max]

There is a chance.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Max]

That was. That was too high of a percentage.

[PFT Commenter]

You went too high for.

[Hank]

What would you give it.

[PFT Commenter]

It's probably like a 33. I was like 25.

[Max]

33 is. And 33 is generous because it. I don't know. There's three things. So I'm just one out of three. 33.

[PFT Commenter]

We're not math guys.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Never were. But yeah. NHL playoffs starting this weekend as well. We get them both. Okay. My who's back of the week. I had two. One first is the. The Badgers doubly both ways. One because they broke my heart on Saturday. Watched almost four full games of the hockey team this year. They lost in the championship game. In the frozen four up one nothing for 50 minutes of the game. Denver and the announcers pooche grass. Credit to him. He kept on saying like this is what the Denver does is what they do. And then that's exactly what they did. They scored two goals in the last 10 minutes and won the national championship. And then the Badgers have not fired, but kind of maybe fired our ad, Chris McIntosh. He's getting a newly appointed job, a brand new job at the Big Ten. They just made it out of thin air. And so now I get a new ad, which is the job. Don't know. But it's, it's never good when you're like, I'm leaving this job for a job that was just created.

[Hank]

Yeah, Special envoy.

[PFT Commenter]

Great.

[Hank]

Special envoy to the big tech has

[PFT Commenter]

not been good the last few years. And so maybe we get an ad who, who, who can fix some things. Maybe get a D who respects podcast money. Because that's, that's the kind of weirdest thing about. Well, there's a lot of things. I'm, I'm, I'm a small piece of Wisconsin and all this stuff going on, but I've offered to pay nil money and no one's followed up with me for like anything, like multiple times asked. They just don't have their shit together. It's crazy. Like, and I, again, maybe they don't respect podcast money and they're like, oh, this guy doesn't, you know, he can't pass in board apes. But you'd think that someone would follow up with me. Someone would be like, hey, remember when you said you wanted to get money? I have said it to the football team and the basketball team.

[Hank]

This is what we call in, in the biz. A hot lead. If you're a salesperson, could be hotter. That is a hot inbound lead. Talk to, looking at, Talk to a

[PFT Commenter]

friend of mine who maybe played in the NBA who also played for the Badgers, and he's like, same thing kind of happened to me.

[Hank]

Damn. Was it Kaminsky?

[PFT Commenter]

I'm not going to say names after his birthday. I'm not going to say names, but it's crazy. How do you not. We just don't have. We haven't had our. Together sounds like years.

[Hank]

Wisconsin needs a Salesforce subscription. I don't think they have one.

[PFT Commenter]

I hope they. I hope they make me say no for the vacant ad job. I will say no, but I hope they make me say no. That'd be kind of cool. Just if they just called, just knowing I'd say no, but just, just so I could say no.

[Hank]

The thing is, you wouldn't say no.

[PFT Commenter]

I would definitely say no. This is probably the last job. Imagine the amount of paperwork you have to Fill out for that job if

[Hank]

they told you you could live in Chicago, still do the show.

[PFT Commenter]

No.

[Hank]

But also be ad.

[PFT Commenter]

No, because I would. I. People would be so mad at me because I know I'd be blamed for everything. And again, the paperwork. Think about the paperwork. There's so much paperwork you have to do.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Like, constant. Also, who's back the week. The NFL draft, because it's coming up. And we now have the thing that every insider knew for the last six months, but somehow we didn't know as the general NFL public. And then every insider says, well, everyone knew it. Why is it a big deal? I'm talking about Reuben Bain. Which seems like a pretty big deal because apparently he was in a car accident two years ago and someone died.

[Hank]

Yeah. Which.

[PFT Commenter]

Pretty serious thing.

[Hank]

But then. Then to get lectured about how everybody already knew about this when everybody was like, wait, what?

[PFT Commenter]

What? Isn't your job as insiders to tell us?

[Hank]

Yes.

[PFT Commenter]

Like, what? How. How is it that everyone is. Everyone in the NFL media circles will be like, yeah, we knew that. Every team knew that. Okay, well, then tell us. I don't even understand how this story never made any news. It's pretty crazy.

[Hank]

It's crazy. I was kept in house, and then I. I did a little bit of reading about it, and it sounds like the family of the. The person who passed away has no ill will towards Reuben Bane. Like, they're wishing the best for him. But still, like, all this is a lot to process.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

And it seemed like y. Maybe NFL teams knew about it for the last couple months, but I don't think anybody else did.

[PFT Commenter]

What isn't the job of the insiders to tell us? Yeah, I don't know. It's just a very weird story and very serious story. But this is the news. This is what happens right before the NFL draft as we start hearing about stuff that then every person in league circles, like, yeah, everyone knew this. Okay, great. Tell us.

[Hank]

Now, I don't think that, like, the NFL is just about getting guys that can play football.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

I think at the end of the day, they don't really care. Unless, like, if he went to court and he was like, my arms are too short to reach the steering wheel.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Then they'd be like, don't know if we got room for you.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

But if you're a productive football player, they don't give a. About any of the, like, alleged red flags.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Hank]

Is that 4am There's a car accident?

[PFT Commenter]

No Breathalyzer. I. The whole story is weird. And I mean this poor, poor girl died. Like she was in a coma and then died. I don't. It's crazy. It's crazy that we are just finding out about this now. But again, apparently everyone else knew, so. Zach, my.

[Zach]

Who's back this week is honorary statues because we had another all time blunder.

[PFT Commenter]

Yes.

[Zach]

And it feels like we're just on a hot streak of the honorary statues never going good.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Zach]

King Griffey rips a. Rips a tarp off Ichiro bat.

[PFT Commenter]

Shattered. Shattered.

[Hank]

And the bat was pretty bad.

[Zach]

It looks sad. Like it looked like a sad baseball bat.

[Hank]

Yeah. Very Ed looked like. Yeah.

[Zach]

Actually, yeah, the balance looked like. We need to see Alice.

[PFT Commenter]

Yes.

[Zach]

Great comms.

[PFT Commenter]

Big time.

[Zach]

Is it?

[PFT Commenter]

What was that word you said?

[Zach]

Oh, that was. That was good columns. That was. I didn't mean to say that out loud, but it's been good communication. You put out some good communication to me. I'll never say that again. I'm sorry.

[PFT Commenter]

No. I want you to speak like a gamer. But that's what you guys say to each other.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Like the comms ro company.

[Scott Van Pelt]

This is.

[Max]

That's one of Zach's like most used words.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, I know. I just. For some reason. In that. In that. Yeah, we're just having a conversation.

[Zach]

Yeah. I didn't even have to make it to the airways.

[PFT Commenter]

No, no.

[Hank]

You and I had a little bad comms over. Over the weekend on Friday. Wonder if we'd like to unpack this a little bit.

[Zach]

We. We can.

[Hank]

Zach and I had a bad back and forth.

[PFT Commenter]

That was.

[Zach]

That was. That was bad.

[PFT Commenter]

You guys had bad comms.

[Hank]

We had really bad comms on Friday and Zach. Zach got a little casual with me over. Over text message.

[Zach]

Accidentally. Extremely casual.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Zach]

Way accidentally though.

[PFT Commenter]

Wait, what happened?

[Zach]

This is. It's not fair. You're framing this.

[PFT Commenter]

Pft.

[Zach]

Okay, it is fair.

[PFT Commenter]

And no, I agree with him.

[Hank]

Zach, it's not fair.

[PFT Commenter]

Is he trying to do. Gotcha. Gotcha.

[Hank]

No, just a little casual.

[Zach]

I had a miss. It was just a mistype.

[E]

And.

[Zach]

But also the way PFT ended things off. I thought about it all weekend.

[Hank]

Did you really?

[PFT Commenter]

You left me hanging there.

[Hank]

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you think about it all weekend.

[PFT Commenter]

Read it. Was it the group text?

[Hank]

No.

[PFT Commenter]

So we were.

[Zach]

We were just trying to decide where to hang some things up and he gave me some direction and incidentally I just said k sounds good. And then I replied quickly to let him know. Swear I was trying to type. Okay. Not K wasn't okay. Not a K in text wasn't okay. And then he just capital K'd me.

[Hank]

Yeah. So Zach accidentally said K instead of okay, but then, like, wrote a paragraph explaining how he meant to type the O before the K, but he didn't. And he.

[PFT Commenter]

Because K can be, like, pissed off.

[Hank]

And then. And then he didn't mean.

[PFT Commenter]

I fire off K when I'm upset.

[Hank]

So I had no choice at that point but to respond to that text with K. Yeah. That was the only thing I could do, Zach.

[Zach]

Now, thinking. Thinking back, that does make a lot more sense. But in the moment, I. I was worried. I was like, I can't let him think I'm just K. And him. I would never.

[PFT Commenter]

You know, sometimes people think if you

[E]

write okay, that that's being too.

[PFT Commenter]

Well. No. So I think if you ranked it, it would.

[E]

Which I think is.

[PFT Commenter]

I think. I think K. Well, yeah, that. You get that from, like, people in the office. Right?

[E]

Even Max. Max was saying I think

[PFT Commenter]

is okay. I think okay is okay. Okay, period. Is bad.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

K capital is. Is bad.

[E]

I think lowercase K is. Is bad.

[Hank]

No, lowercase K, you're just on the go.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, that's like a quick. That's fast.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[E]

Okay. No, you can hit one other button.

[Hank]

You know what the worst?

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

When you're mad at someone, like, you do the worst.

[Hank]

The worst is okay, period. That's.

[PFT Commenter]

What I've ever seen anyone do that.

[Hank]

If you get that, you're.

[PFT Commenter]

I don't.

[E]

What's worse. Okay.

[PFT Commenter]

Or.

[E]

Or got it.

[PFT Commenter]

Was it got it or gut it?

[E]

Got it.

[PFT Commenter]

Gutted is the most. You don't gut it. It's just always.

[Max]

It should just always be okay, sounds good. But okay, okay, sounds good should just always be the answer.

[PFT Commenter]

Yes. Or just sounds good.

[Hank]

Yeah, sounds good. You can just get rid of the okay, okay, period.

[PFT Commenter]

Is. I'm pissed at you. Yeah.

[Max]

Hank does it all the time.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. I do not do, period. I do not, period. Is like, really pissed.

[E]

It's like, hey, this is the plan. I say okay.

[Hank]

It's a really fucked up.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, yeah, I see. Yeah. You. Max is right. You're pissed about that. When you say okay, like, hey, here's the plan. You say okay.

[E]

What if I said okay, exclamation point.

[Hank]

Yeah, it's cool.

[Max]

That would be fine.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Max]

Exclamation point, help.

[PFT Commenter]

Or just say, sounds good.

[E]

I guess I could say sounds good. That's a lot of typing.

[PFT Commenter]

Sounds good. Might get you for people. Yeah, that. I think that's. That would probably, like Clear up half your relationships if you just do. Sounds good, I guess.

[Hank]

Does anybody have any idea where okay came from?

[PFT Commenter]

I think it's the band that ran on the. Okay, go. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Hank]

It's just weird that we got a word that's like, all right, but it's just two letters, and those two letters make a word. Yeah. You up Now?

[Max]

I don't like. I don't want to say language. Language come from.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Humorous, intentional misspelling of all correct.

[Hank]

But that's not. O is not all and K is not correct.

[PFT Commenter]

All right, hold on.

[Hank]

It first appeared in print on March 23 in the Boston Morning Post. English word as part of a fad for using abbreviations.

[PFT Commenter]

Most modern references works hold the original around Boston. Part of a fad in the late 1830s. Yeah. And all correct. O, L, L. Correct as a misspelling of all correct. This. That's weird, huh? Yeah. Hank, stop doing okay to people.

[E]

Got it.

[PFT Commenter]

There you go. Nice.

[Hank]

Sounds good.

[PFT Commenter]

Sounds good is all you need.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay, here's the plan.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

See, K is actually better. I think K is better than okay. And from coming from you.

[E]

Okay. Sounds good.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Okay.

[PFT Commenter]

Sounded terrible. I can. I can tell how angry you are with just that.

[E]

Okay.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

I'm not Matt. Zach. Do you have any others that you were saving?

[Zach]

The others I just had were. Caleb. Not focusing on football, me and Coachella and JB going. 10 million for two weekends.

[PFT Commenter]

So that's. Did you. Did you. I mean, did you not research about Neutrogena?

[Zach]

Neutrogena?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. In the nil deal he had.

[Zach]

I thought we were researching the probe this week.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Hank]

On the space probe?

[Zach]

No, the NFL probe.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Right.

[Hank]

Oh, yeah, yeah, that's right.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That sounds good.

[Zach]

Was that the wrong project?

[Hank]

Yeah. No, no, that's right. How's the probe going?

[Zach]

Probe's not going good. There's. There's some conflicting information on the probe being, like, who started the probe and why it's there.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Zach]

There's, like, a couple working theories. You guys want to know?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, sure.

[Zach]

The probe could be due.

[Hank]

You want to say what the probe is?

[Zach]

So the probe is the Department of Justice meddling around in the FL's inner workings, and they're saying they're doing it because of, like, not poor work conditions, but, like, violations of federal labor laws and work discrimination, like, practices. But I really think it's more about the money. I think they're trying to get in there on the TV rights.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Zach]

And they're saying it's not really the DOJ that wants to do it. It's more so one of the. One of the big rich families.

[PFT Commenter]

Got it.

[Hank]

Okay.

[Zach]

That being the Murdoch family.

[PFT Commenter]

Ah. Okay, now we're getting somewhere.

[Zach]

So, like inside NFL guys are saying, could be the Murdochs because, you know, they own Fox and they. There's like a.

[Hank]

That's why the story was in the Wall Street Journal the other day. Okay.

[Zach]

And there's another spin zone where it's like back in the day, the current guy who runs the whole country tried to get a team. They wouldn't let him get a team. So that this is just him maybe trying to get his get back for past wrongdoings. So there's a couple different angles.

[Hank]

Okay, well, hot seat Pablo Torre, because I think Zach just got to the bottom of this, so it should take

[Zach]

a couple of months. We always gotta just follow the money.

[Hank]

That's really good investigative journalism.

[PFT Commenter]

Big time. Good job, Zach. Okay, should we get our interview with Scott Van Pelt from the airport? Tradition unlike any other. Let's do it.

[Hank]

Before we get to Scott Van Pelt, he's brought to you by Microsoft 365 copilot. It's something that helps people focus on what's most important. What if you could add an AI assistant to your work without leaving your workflow built into Microsoft Word, Excel, and Outlook? Copilot works where you work, helping you do more. In the apps that you already use. In Word, Copilot helps turn scattered notes into a first draft. In Excel, it generates insights from your data. And in Outlook, it cuts through the noise to get you up to speed faster. The apps that you know go further with Copilot. Learn more at m365copilot.com work work. That's m365copilot.com work. Scott Van Pelt's also brought to you by Jose Cuervo. When Cuervo enters, every moment just gets better. You can find yourself in the center of the dance floor. You can't help but stand up and high five those around you. At the game, the room reacts like it just got the same text at the same time. You stop checking the time and suddenly small talk escalates to laughing so hard that you can barely catch your breath. That's the Cuervo effect. A signal everybody understands. A moment that anyone can join and a good time that just grows. All you have to do is keep it Cuervo. And now, here is Scott Van Pelt.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay, we now welcome on a very, very, very, very, very Special guest. It is our favorite master's tradition. It is Scott Van Pelt, Scotty two hottie from the Augusta Airport. After being at Augusta for the last week, five days, seven days. I don't even know how long you're there. Do you live there?

[Scott Van Pelt]

I got. I got here a week ago Sunday. So it's been. This has been a prolonged stay in Augusta.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay, beautiful. And we were troubleshooting. We had some issues with the cameras before. I'm happy you could now see us, because we came locked and loaded this year. We brought our own tech. Big Texas for everyone. We have a huge box of them.

[Hank]

Here we go.

[PFT Commenter]

Big. You got another one? Yep, I got a bunch of them.

[Hank]

Look at these baddies right here.

[PFT Commenter]

This is the sign that we have got a new green jacket winner, which actually, this year, we don't. We have the same green jacket winner. Scott, tell us everything. How. How was, how was today? How was this week? Rory, we're not Rory fans, but you can sell us on Rory.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yeah, I, I was. I was following you today, and I saw that you were not rooting for Rory. I'll be honest. I, I, I was rooting for Justin Rose just because I want him to win one, and Rory already has one. Like, the thing about this place is, if you come here, all you can think is, I want to keep getting to come back here every spring because it's just. It's awesome, and the people are great, and it's the, you know, the traditions and all that. So I was pulling for Justin just because I feel like he's been so close, and it feels like, you know, karma or something. Maybe not. He's not owed one, but I wanted him to win, but, I mean, Roy's an awesome player, and we should love great things, and he's great, so, you know, he made history last year. He made history again. You'll forgive me. I'm just sitting in the snack room here.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, in the break room. Yes.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I'm going to get comfy, so. But why weren't you rooting for him? Big cat? Did you have giant futures on somebody else?

[PFT Commenter]

No. Honestly. Well, there was. It was two. Part one is. I've just never been a Rory guy. I think it's the, you know, partially Ryder cup, partially just, you know, I. We're big believers on this show. I think there's some people who watch golf, and they. They kind of root for whoever ends up winning. They're just like, oh, what an accomplishment. I like to treat golf like it's actually, you know, Almost a team sport where it's like you have your guys, you don't and you have guys you don't like. Roy's been always in the don't like and then especially today. And I, I want you to tell us what it felt like. But there was a moment where it was like there could be a five player playoff here. And I think we all were kind of rooting for that and we were rooting for Scotty at least, bare minimum, Scotty and Rory to be in a playoff. So it was partially that where it was like, this is going to be great. We're going to get bonus golf. All these guys have caught up. And then he, Rory was able to just kind of put him away and never really sweat down the last three holes.

[Scott Van Pelt]

That's all fair. And I mean the thing that's so different about this year and last year is, okay, had he not won last year, then today everyone would have, everyone would have been filled with dread and angst and like, my God, this poor guy can't do it and he's never going to win. How's he going to blow it? But since he had a green jacket, all of that was gone. And so the fact that a six shot lead from Saturday morning was, had evaporated. Totally different feel. And you're right, I mean, as, as the day plays out, it feels like here we go, right? You know, all these different players involved Hatton and Henley and Morikawa. Awesome job by him battling through a back injury. And Scotty's lurking. Scotty was 12 shots back before Saturday started. And you're thinking he's out. No chance. He finishes a shot out in the end. But it was kind of like, it was close, but kind of fake close, you know what I mean? Like we, we, we never got that sense of, here we go, man. We're going to be playing five wide into darkness. And the thing that I think most people want is, you know, they used to say, Ken Venturi famously said, you know, Masters doesn't start till the back nine on Sunday. Well, you know, now it's second nine. Thank you. And we're on the second nine and you're waiting for fireworks. And they didn't happen. They really didn't come today. And so I think it's, I guess it's disappointing just because you just want to see the fireworks. You want to see, you know, somebody whole one from hoop, one from 30ft away or knock one close for a birdie. And if Rory makes that one on, excuse me, if Scotty makes the one on 12. Then Rory has to play 18 with a totally different feeling. And it just didn't happen. It almost reminded me of how Tiger won tournaments so many times where he would get a lead and then other guys just fell off. And it lacked that incredible drama late. But that's just a credit to the fact that Rory played better than they did and they just couldn't, they couldn't encroach on the guy. And Rose made a couple of costly bogeys and wasn't able to get back to, to the top like he did a year ago.

[Hank]

Yeah, I've got an impossible question for you to answer, but I'm going to ask it anyways. The impossible question. If Rory didn't win last year, do you think he would have been able to hang on through the last three holes this year? No, I agree.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I don't, I really don't. And I'll tell you why. Like, there's a, there's a now I'm in like a work area. I'm just, I'm in a new, I'm in a new fb, I'm in a new fbo. I'm lost. I might just, if I wander into, like, I might be in the tarmac in a minute, I don't know what the fuck I'm doing. I don't think he would have pft because I think that there's, he had this freedom of. And he said it Saturday, like, I got it. I got to remind myself that I still tied for the lead and I have a green jacket. And then he's like a little bit of a flex, you know, I have to remind myself that I have a green jacket, which I do, you know, and he gets to go to the champions locker room last night. He knows he's good. And I think if he had to, knowing it's Scotty and it's a one shot lead and he's never won here and he's trying to finish the career Grand Slam. No, I, I, and that's not a knock on him. That's just an acknowledgment of how heavy the weight would have been if he didn't win last year.

[Hank]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So last year was really worth two.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. And I, I, I don't know if you saw this, I mentioned it because we already taped the beginning of the show. But like I felt like the pace that Rory played with. Cause he got in a couple tough spots, but he didn't really stand over a lot of shots. He was kind of Just kept on moving along. You could see that confidence in him of like, I know what I'm doing. And maybe it's because he, by all accounts, he played Augusta 75 times in the last month and a half.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yeah, he, he, he, he spent a bunch of time up here and I mean Hanky acknowledged as much, like drop his daughter off to school, hop on the pj, fly up, play around, come back for dinner. I mean, and by the way, like, I think people hear that and they're like, well, why should he get to do that? Like, well, Justin Thomas came up here and played practice rounds too. I mean it's not like it's, he got some special perk that other players wouldn't have gotten. But yeah, I mean he spent a, he spent a ton of time here and he knows it well, I mean he's been playing it for years, since 2009 as a pro. So there's, I mean there's a lot that was cooked into today. And look, ultimately he had a two shot lead, he had a green jacket and he could play it up this wrong side of 18 and still win. My guy, Andy north was like, I don't know what he's doing hitting a driver, but it didn't cost him. And I mean it's, it's a different relief, like a different joy. But now he's got six. And you talk about a flex. Like you go into the Butler cabin and the chairman puts the jacket on you because there's, I won, like give me my coat back, you know.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And by the way, we also mentioned the, I think people are put off by the private jet part of it. But it's no, like if you said that that was Kobe Bryant, Kobe Bryant. A story like that comes out about Kobe or mj, everyone's like, oh my God, that's mama mentality. They just want it more. They went up there every day in practice. So it's like, yeah, he, he has the ability to do it. Why wouldn't he become the most prepared golfer for this tournament? So he has six we it, it's a cheap day after radio trick that I'm sure you, you've done in your career over under eight and a half majors.

[Scott Van Pelt]

For Rory, three more.

[PFT Commenter]

Three more. He may never lose Augusta again.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yeah, Fred couple said he's going to win them all.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Scott Van Pelt]

From now on. Three is a lot, man. I mean he didn't win any for more than a decade now. He's won this two in a row. Three seems like a lot. Eight Feels like a eight. Feels like a healthy number.

[Hank]

Okay.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I'm not rooting against. I'm not rooting against them winning 10. I don't. I mean, go get them. But I just think it's a. Winning ones is a lot, man. Like three. That's half of what he's got in his whole career. That seems like too many to me.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay, follow up question. Who ends up with more, Scotty or Rory? I think Scotty's about to turn 30. Rory's 36,

[Scott Van Pelt]

I think. I mean, what Scotty got. He's got two of these. And the Open Championship.

[PFT Commenter]

He's got four, I believe.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yeah, yeah, he's got four.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Scott Van Pelt]

So he's got. And he'll. He'll go to Shinnecock with a chance to finish the slam if he wins the US Opening. So he's got four. I mean, Scotty just has more Runway. So he's, you know, if He's. Is he six years younger? So that's 24 more majors. That's. Give me. I'll take. I'll take Scotty. I'm just trying to be hot. Take Scott.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Late night hot. Take Scotty.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. Well, I mentioned too, like, it. It is sometimes golf, especially the Masters, is kind of. It's not easy. But now we're at a spot where four out of the last five Masters champions are Scotty or Rory. And those are the two best golfers in the game. And those are the two guys that will probably define the post Tiger era the most. And they're dominating this tournament.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I agree. But it's like it's still. And Rory said this tonight. He said, I tried to tell myself the reason this was so hard last year is because I was trying to complete the slam. But what I realized now is it's just really hard to win this tournament. And I'd say the reason. There's a million reasons. Part of it's the golf course and how it kind of sets up in a way that brings many players into the mix. It always happens. Happen again today, but it's how many guys play it really well. Justin Rose has had so many close chances. You know, Cameron Young's not going to go away. Colin Morocco, a battle throw back. He's here in the mix and on down the line. There's just so many players. And I said, you know, before this week, oh, who give me an outlier. Give me a, you know, someone who's a dark horse. And it's like, why bother with that? It's not going to be Someone that's, that's some off the grid player. Like the, your leaderboard on Sunday is going to look like what you think it's going to look like. I just don't know what the order is. And that's what this play like when we go to Shinnecock, when you go to the Open Championship, when we go to the PGA in Philly next week, shout out to max. It'll be, it'll be. If there's an outlier, wouldn't surprise me. But here it'll, I feel like it's almost always going to be this type of player.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Delivers. And you were talking about, you know, the gap that Rory had in between. So he won a bunch up until 2014, then nothing till 2025. Now he's won the last two matches. Row his is his game like completely different right now than it was three years ago.

[Scott Van Pelt]

He just hits the ball so far. I mean he just, he's, that he's like. And the issue, he was crooked a lot this week. Like he didn't hit a lot of great, a lot of straight drives. But when he does, my God, he hits it 340. He's, he's his swing. And even if you don't like golf a lot. Like I get, you know, the awls if you don't like golf. All right. But just watch the dude swing and picture like a perfect, like a Ken Griffey Jr. Baseball swing. Like it's perfect perfectly on balance. There's so much power. It's. I just, I marvel watching the guy hit the ball. His wedge game for a great player is not great, but his short game this week was insane. So I think, I mean, pft. You're asking like, what's better? At the moment, I think he's, he's, he just hits the ball so frigging far. And he was a little wayward this week, but when he's straight, I mean, good luck.

[PFT Commenter]

How, how much, how much potential ad dollars did Major League Baseball lose out on with Cam Young not winning?

[Scott Van Pelt]

I have no idea. Get Ravel on.

[PFT Commenter]

He knows that the, the MLB patch is so funny on his collar. It just, it makes me laugh every

[Scott Van Pelt]

single time I listen, I, I, I get a kick out of that because I know all the agents, all these guys have been friends forever. And I always, I always love to look at like, all right, we got one here. We got one here. Got one. Like, I mean, it's just, you're a human signage, right? Like each spot is, is a place you could throw Something. I mean, grab that cash. I got no problem with it.

[Hank]

Yeah, it was very funny. I think it was when he won it at the Players and he was wearing like a light blue shirt with the MLB logo and he actually looked like an umpire. Like, that should be his Sunday outfit. It's like his umpire Sunday time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There were, there were. So I feel like there was an NFL team at one point that sponsored a PGA golfer, too,

[Scott Van Pelt]

back in the day that he used to wear the. The colors on Sunday of. Of the closest home team to where he played. And he actually did that during a stretch when he was playing great in major championships. That's actually a great sponsorship.

[Hank]

Yeah. Yeah, I love that. I love that a lot. Also, Scott, I was reading a story. I didn't realize this, but at Augusta, we were talking earlier about how Mark Calavecchi had got escorted off the grounds for smuggling in a cell phone. I guess, first. First question is just what was your reaction to that? What was word around Augusta?

[Scott Van Pelt]

I mean, you're not supposed to have one. I say that as someone who's allowed to have one. So I, it kind of. I, you know, you're not supposed to do it. And so, like, the minute you pull out your phone, buddy, you're. You're taking your. Your badge into your own hands. And so, I mean, yeah, it was the kind of thing that people are like, damn, can you believe, like, they calc got kicked out? And it's like. Well, I mean, yeah, I. I've said all week when people come here, they just kind of know how to act. And I mean, I get it. Is. Is it a big deal in the grand scheme of things? No, not really. But at Augusta, unless you have one of these little orange things on the back of your phone that's like a little sticker, then you're not meant to have one. And, you know, because I'm in media and I'm theoretically, I mean, I need one to, you know, watch tick tock videos and stuff like that.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

And why. And like, follow along for me. Not rooting against.

[Hank]

Yes. You need to log on to Twitter. Yeah.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I need to know who bit Cat's got who Big Cat's futures are, who he's rooting for, things of the. That nature.

[Hank]

Yeah. That was going to be the second part of my question, which I. I read that you are allowed to have a phone. So I'm wondering, does that come with any. Like, do you have any guilt, the fact that you're allowed to be having phone, or does it do you feel awesome? Like I'm, I'm above everybody else here because yeah, they let me have my own cell phone.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Not above, not above anyone. But I, I mean, it's. Even though I know I'm allowed to have it, if I pull it out, I still like hide it. Like see Woo Kim did when he was smoking at the players. Like I go somewhere, you know what I mean? Like, I, I'm not waving it around for all to see just because I don't. I just, I don't know. I'm still afraid I'm gonna get kicked out, but I, I don't think I am.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Scott, how did you, how did you cover the Masters all week? And you were at in a Gus all week and then you found time to go fix Ichiro's statue?

[Scott Van Pelt]

Because I'm, I'm a man of the people, Big Cat. And I, I figured I, like, who could get up that high to fix the bat? Only me. I. I saw, I saw that. I meant to say, I meant to send something out about it, but I think I was hosting the Masters and I didn't get right on it. But eventually I responded. But I mean we. Forever we've done that bit, right? Like where in the world, Blah, blah, blah. And I mean, it's. After a while I'm like, maybe we should let that go. But I saw that guy and I was like, Jesus Christ, that poor guy looks a lot like me.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, yeah, he does. By. By the way. Yeah. I mean, it's also great cause you have Steve next to you. Steve, I'm assuming, is listening to this right now on Monday morning.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I hope so.

[PFT Commenter]

If Rory had choked, would it have been the biggest chok since Duke lost that 19 point lead to Yukon and Braylon Mullens hit that shot?

[Scott Van Pelt]

I mean, I don't want to, you know, take shots at my guy Duke, my guy Steve and the Brotherhood. I would.

[Max]

It.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I mean, the problem for Steve and for Duke is that like last year Rory won the master so they could just go. And in Duke's case, last year they had a big lead against Houston in the final four and they lost that. So they kind of have a. They got a bad trend. They got a bad trend going there.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, they're actually. Yeah. Rory and Duke are forever intertwined.

[Hank]

It's tough to see. Yeah, I, I imagine like, you know, sometimes if Big Cat has a tough loss, I'm here with him and you know, there's usually like a, I'd say like three or four hour buffer zone. Before I can really twist the knife too much. Yeah, was. I know. Scott, you might be the same way about Maryland losses. I've heard. Is Steve the same way about Duke losses?

[Scott Van Pelt]

He's. He's fascinating to me because he didn't go there, and it's a thing, like, with him and his dad, and like, he. He kind of did it despite his dad, but he. He. I mean, you'll see it if you. Again, social media. I knew you were rooting against rory. He'll say UConn Moneyline, and he'll. He'll tweet North Carolina Moneyline every single time that they play them and you. And then I'll just. And I just say to him, this is what you do. You do this thing, and I call him out on. And he'll just get defiant. Like, no, no. That mean I just. They're gonna lose.

[PFT Commenter]

It's a good bet. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Scott Van Pelt]

And I will say Carolina in Chapel Hill, he was right. And UConn and. And the. And the NCAA Tournament. He was right. So, I mean, he's got. He's got a little bit of. He's got some results, I suppose he can turn to. But it's just what he does. He becomes the, you know, the happiness hedge guy, bet against your team, blah, blah, blah. But that. That's what he does. But I don't. I mean, I don't heckle. He didn't go there. And I don't want to be a dick. My team lost 21 games this year. Who am I going to make fun of?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, there's always a. There's always a grace period, too. Like, I didn't text him for a while, and then once it happens, I mean, he didn't. He actually was on a group text after Wisconsin lost the High Point. He did not chime in, but someone else did, and that person has been debted by me. So he. Steve. Steve knows. Steve understands. He's. He's a good fan. Like that.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Right. I think that. I mean, if it really hurts you, then. Then just. Don't you get that your fandom. There should be respect. So I don't make fun. I don't make fun.

[PFT Commenter]

Scott, speaking of Steve, he might. He's still a. Maybe. For Max's bachelor party, we would like to invite you. There's a chance that Kevin Willard will be attending. He also has an invite. Would you like to attend?

[Scott Van Pelt]

I'm all set. I'm good.

[Hank]

You sure?

[PFT Commenter]

What if we throw in a box of Big Texas?

[Scott Van Pelt]

I'm. I'm all set. I hope. I wish. I wish Max all the happiness in the world, but I'm. I'm good.

[Hank]

You don't want to go to the Sphere?

[Scott Van Pelt]

That guy Max?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, Max. That's Max. Yeah.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I'm kidding. We're good. I don't. I don't. I'm all. I mean, it's fine. Why would he want me?

[Max]

I didn't take any shots.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, you took some shots.

[Max]

I didn't take any shots. Listen, if I was. If I was a Maryland fan, I would be pissed at Kevin Willard, too. I get why Maryland fans are mad. All I said is that I don't care about Maryland basketball, and I don't.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Nor. I don't care about you or Villanova, so it's fine.

[PFT Commenter]

That.

[Scott Van Pelt]

That's great.

[Max]

I. I hope that.

[PFT Commenter]

Do we have a don't care? Are we in a don't care?

[Hank]

Max, it did sound great, the way you said it.

[PFT Commenter]

Nothing like a good old fashioned don't care.

[Hank]

Who cares less?

[Scott Van Pelt]

Isn't that the truth? I don't care. But twice. I don't. I don't care. Twice. Yeah, and louder. I don't care.

[Max]

I know.

[PFT Commenter]

You guys are basically doing, like, the Twitter. Like, you're in my mentions, bro.

[Hank]

No, this is.

[Max]

Well, this was Steve.

[Scott Van Pelt]

This was Steve's doing.

[Hank]

This is the end. I mean, Dr. Strangelove.

[PFT Commenter]

When they're in an argument over who's more. Sorry.

[Hank]

Sorry. As they blow up the world.

[PFT Commenter]

I love it. I love it. All right, so I'll put you down as a maybe.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yeah, it's exactly. Yeah, maybe.

[Hank]

Maybe we'll put you on.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Where is it? Is it a cookout, or is it, like. Are we going to Vegas?

[PFT Commenter]

No, we're going to Vegas. We're doing the whole thing.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Oh, hold on now. Where are we staying?

[PFT Commenter]

We're staying at the win.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Oh, see, now we're talking.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, I'm.

[Scott Van Pelt]

When?

[PFT Commenter]

May. The weekend of the Kentucky Derby.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I love the win.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, you do.

[Scott Van Pelt]

That steakhouse. Sw. That steakhouse.

[PFT Commenter]

Yes, we've dined there.

[Hank]

Scott, can I add in two more words that might be of interest to you?

[PFT Commenter]

I heard you say gaming.

[Hank]

Oh, Spearmint Rhino.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Oh, no, I can't.

[Hank]

Okay, okay. All right, fair enough.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Can I tell you a story about that? So this is a true story. A friend of mine back in the day when I was, like, going a lot to Vegas, making poor decisions. This is a true story. A friend of mine was this stuntman guy. He was Ben Affleck's stunt double, and he was this ridiculous like, motorcycle rider, handsome guy. It's a long story. Anyway, he was friends, legitimate friends, with a dancer at the Rhino. And we went there, and we're walking through, as you do, and a guy's getting a dance. Okay. And this is around the time that I had done a commercial. This is 100 years. It's 25 years ago. I was doing the 6 o' clock sports center, and the gist of the ad was, scott, we want you to host a six o' clock show. And I'm like, but six o' clock is dinner time. So that was the tagline. Six o' clock's dinner time. Some guy is sitting there in a chair, and this woman has her boobs in his face. And I'm walking by, and he literally shoves this naked woman out of his lap and says, hey, Scott, what time is dinner time? And I'm like, jesus Christ. And I literally, I don't know, break. I don't break stride. And I'm like, evidently, right now. And I just keep going. And I just told my guy. I told my guy. I'm like, I don't think I really can come back here and be just, like, walking around gen pop. So I'll pass on that.

[Hank]

Okay.

[Scott Van Pelt]

But the gaming, I mean, that sounds like a good time.

[PFT Commenter]

It does. We did. Was that the room that.

[Hank]

That. That I met you in super bowl week a couple years ago?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Sat down at the blackjack table.

[PFT Commenter]

Yes.

[Hank]

Split a couple hands and. And went down, like, six grand immediately.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Well, you have more drugs that you'll offer me?

[Hank]

Yeah. Mushrooms are not drugs.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Great. Yeah, that was. It was a less than subtle attempt to hand off hallucinogenics, which I appreciated a lot.

[Hank]

I know.

[PFT Commenter]

I wish I had handed off to him because I went to dinner with you, Scott, But I had. I got that, like, Friday guilt of super bowl week, where I was like, I got to just go. Go home. So I went and took a red eye, and I just handed pft all my mushrooms. And then, like. Like four hours later, he sends me a selfie of him smiling ear to ear with Mark Davis walking by. And I was like, all right, it's going well.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I need to ask you a question. Pft for you for just. So we had a group myself, I guess, Rossillo Long, Steve, big cat. And he got the guilts, and he had the Friday night scaries. And so we had a meal going, and he left before, like, he couldn't even offer to pay.

[PFT Commenter]

I'm pretty sure I did.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Pretty sure it was credit card roulette. I think. And your card wasn't even part of it because you left. I just think. I think you got at least half even. You got a fake offer.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. I'm not saying you're old, Scott, but I think you're misremembering this.

[Hank]

Leave after entrees.

[PFT Commenter]

I'm pretty sure I stayed the whole time.

[Scott Van Pelt]

We had. We had. We had desserts where, like, people were feeding each other desserts.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay, I had those. I'm kidding.

[Scott Van Pelt]

You left. You left. You left after desserts. The whole meal was served. He ate.

[PFT Commenter]

And I'm pretty sure I. I'm pretty sure I at least face it.

[Hank]

Listen, a guy.

[PFT Commenter]

Like, when it goes to the big guy, you, you know, the. The. The credit card always goes to the. The big. The big guy in. In the room at the dinner. If I'm out with my, you know, with. With the guys in the booth. It's not even a question.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Listen, my feeling is if you eat with me, the meals on me, that's just. I'm. You're. I'm paying, but that group insisted on. We're going to do credit card. And so as far as I'm concerned, your credit's good with me. You didn't need. I. I wasn't going to ask you to pay. I'm just saying I felt like when you left before anyone even had a chance to pay, I felt like maybe.

[PFT Commenter]

I don't know. I think you're getting old. I think I did. I think I did. I'm going to have to reconfirm.

[Hank]

Guy like me or. I know big cat pretty good. At some point in the future, he will do the thing where he talks to the waiter like before. Oh, yeah. And he gets the credit card to them. So you can offer. And then he'll be like, it's already taken care of. And then you get to get mad at him for paying.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, that's gonna happen to you next time.

[Scott Van Pelt]

That's the move.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I gotta go. I gotta go to the bathroom. And then you walk by the bathroom and you just say, hey, here, give me the bill. And you just pay for it.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Then you come back, you're like, hey, when we get the bill. No, we're all good. We're leaving.

[PFT Commenter]

I did that in Scottsdale when we had a dinner of like 10 people. I was like, I'm just not even. Because it's like. You also get to a point where it's like, we're not going to split this 10 ways. We can't do that. We you can't you get to a level of. Of, you know, being an adult?

[Scott Van Pelt]

We're adults. Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

We can't do that.

[Scott Van Pelt]

We're adults.

[PFT Commenter]

All right, Scott, I know you got a flight in a second, so I got. I got one last question. I'm sure PFT has a last question, too. This is a weird one, though. It's the Roback question. R, H, O, B, A, C, K.com promo code, take 20 off your first purchase. Q, zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts. Roback.com promo code take. I don't even know where. Where this came from, but I'm going to just read it. It's awl. Devin Tyler, he.

[Hank]

He.

[PFT Commenter]

I guess he's tweeted this at me two days in a row now, and it seems like a Berenstein Bears situation. He said, need help finding an ESPN commercial with SVP? My friends and I have quoted this commercial for years, 10 to 15, and have never been able to find it. It's with SVP and we think a New York Giants wide receiver. And it ends with the wide receiver screaming mama in a puddle on the field. I've reached everywhere and can't find it. Can you please ask SVP to release the files on Sunday? Thank you in advance. Is this a real thing?

[Scott Van Pelt]

No. This person is in the middle of, like, a fever dream.

[PFT Commenter]

That's what I got figured. But at least we.

[Hank]

Is that a commercial? Just not a Scott Van Pel commercial.

[PFT Commenter]

I just saw it. I was like, I have to ask Scott now. I gotta help this guy out. He might, like, he. He might be going insane. And we're on day two. Thankfully, we caught it early. But if we went like an entire full year till next year, and it's like, hey, I'm looking for this commercial that doesn't exist. So you're saying you never did a commercial with the Giants wide receiver?

[Scott Van Pelt]

No, I mean, I just. I mean, I know, and I did a lot of them. And I mean, I did. Six o' clock is dinner time. When, like, that was way back in the day. But a Giants wide receiver that yelled mama, Ma.

[PFT Commenter]

Like in a puddle on the field.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I'm really sorry. This doesn't ring a bell of any kind. Yeah, I wish I could help. I wish I had. Yeah, we. And here's the thing. I got nothing. I'm sorry.

[Hank]

All right. They're looking for another. This is Sports center commercial. I think we've got the start of a good one.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Scott Van Pelt]

It sounds like a hell of a script. We're working with. Can I just mention one thing? If. If I just want to say to all of the folks, all the awls that. That screamed big Texas at me this week. It's. It's my own version of being max homo with spicy meatball. It has reached a level that you cannot comprehend. It's all I heard for a week. It's like, big Texas. It's incredible. And I want you all to see something. All right.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Oh, we've had some bad luck, but we. We up the FBO situation this year. I don't know what I got to do here. Do I hit the camera? That's like a peep off. No, that wasn't it. All right, so I like this.

[PFT Commenter]

I like how Scott is saying we've had some bad luck with the big Texas. Oh, we're back.

[Hank]

We're so bad.

[PFT Commenter]

We're so back.

[Scott Van Pelt]

It's F6, and I'm. I'm gonna have to purchase a big Texas for the flight, and we're gonna be dining like an absolute king on the way home. But I just want to say, so I. I mean, I. I kid you not. I wish you all could come here and wander. I mean, well, if they saw you, it would be a different thing because they'd freak out because it's you. But it's. They're just endless. Hey, Sunday night, big, you know, big cat. Pft. You got a big Texas. And, like. Yeah, Yeah. I mean, I don't know what to say, but we got the big Texas. I feel like that's a good way for, like, some karma to end it that they're actually. We're back.

[Hank]

That is nice. And. Yeah, that's. That's, like, an impossible thing for you to, like, have a comeback to in a witty way. Like, what are you gonna say if they're like, hey, Scott, Big Texas.

[PFT Commenter]

You do like the nom nom roll. Let's go pretend to eat.

[Scott Van Pelt]

It's not a question. It's a statement. Right? It's just, hey, Scott, Big Texas. Yeah.

[Hank]

Can't wait.

[PFT Commenter]

You gotta keep one on you.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I'm. I mostly say they're. They're. It's. You guys know, it's a bit. They're kind of. They're kind of dense. Or I'll just say delish, and I'll give them, like, a little chef kit. Depends.

[Hank]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Give them. Yeah. Delish. There you go.

[PFT Commenter]

I. I do.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Go ahead.

[PFT Commenter]

I do like, Scott, that you're like, yeah, we've had some bad luck on the big Texas. And again, like two years ago, you came on this show and your house was burning down, which I. Thankfully, you're. Everything's okay now. But I. I does trigger a memory now that. That you know on this. But we talk. We keep out the big Texas. Everything's good now.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yeah, it was. It was literally like three years ago that my phone's ringing and the house was burning to the ground, and I was searching for a. For a pastry.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Scott Van Pelt]

And. And then in the condiments or whatever, the. It's called The. The thing.

[E]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, yeah.

[Scott Van Pelt]

A little fried. At the end of the week, the. What the hell's it called?

[Hank]

Vending machine.

[PFT Commenter]

You got it.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Jesus Christ.

[PFT Commenter]

For the record, I rest my case in front of the jury that. That Scott doesn't have a great memory right now when it comes to paying.

[Scott Van Pelt]

It's a little concerning, sir.

[PFT Commenter]

The client couldn't come up with the name of a vending machine.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I didn't. I didn't get it. I. And. And maybe for all you know what. Maybe what we. Maybe I did do a commercial where mama was saying. And maybe I'm just. It's. It's full on full blown dementia happening right here for all to see.

[Hank]

Just gaslighting some poor listener of ours. Yeah. That they were right about the mama commercial.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yeah, it happened. He didn't remember. Vending machine. He's. I'm. Pretty sure he didn't. He can't remember what happened a minute ago. I tell Max. Tell Max I'm in. How about that? We'll come.

[PFT Commenter]

I love that he's a maybe as well, so I think we can push the big guy to come too.

[Hank]

Scott, I got one more question for you because I. I know, I know. Every week, every time it's the Masters, there's somebody out there that's like, yeah, I could. I could shoot in the 80s at Augusta. I was thinking about it last week, and I know that I'm, like, a little bit delusional, but also, I don't think I'm that delusional. I think that people are showing, like, too much reverence for Augusta and talking about it like it's Flanders Field and in Belgium and. And thousands of young men go there every year and never come home. I think that if you gave me 10 tries from the tips at Augusta, I could break 110 on two of those tries. And I'm. I'm like an 18 handicap, so I'm not good.

[Scott Van Pelt]

So two out of 10 times, you're breaking 110.

[Hank]

Yeah, that's what I think. I think that my drop dead score, like if I, if I shoot higher than 130, you can kill me me.

[Scott Van Pelt]

From the, from the championship. TE's that they played today.

[PFT Commenter]

Yep. Yes. Yep.

[Hank]

From the tips. Am I. Is that an insane.

[Scott Van Pelt]

You're playing, you're playing stroke play golf. You're. You're counting every shot, counting ball and cup. You have no chance of doing that.

[PFT Commenter]

All right, all right.

[Hank]

How would. What did you shoot, Scott?

[Scott Van Pelt]

I broke a hundred.

[Hank]

That's pretty good.

[Scott Van Pelt]

But I play. But it was, but it was, it was not championship tease. You play the member tees here. They. You're not backing it all the way up because no disrespect to you or me, like, we're not these guys. It's, it's so difficult. And if you're out of position, you're going to make big numbers. 1. I mean, if you put it this way, no joke being totally serious. Pft. If you said, you know what? I'm just going to try to hit seven irons. I'm going to try to hit three seven irons, get on the green two putt, try to make bogeys. Okay, maybe if that's your plan, but I'm telling you, it's. You're gonna make big numbers. And before you know it, you're like, oh, I'm in. I. I'm really in trouble here. And I'm, I don't think it's possible.

[Hank]

So I, I would play it in a way to try to like, yeah, try to hit those numbers. I would have to get a seven on every par three. Well, if I were to add 53. Let's see. I'm trying to think what I'd need to average per hole, but basically I would try to play it so that I could break 110. And then if I'm breaking 130, then I have to basically average an 8. I got, I have to average a snowman on every hole.

[Scott Van Pelt]

The problem is, is you're gonna end. You're gonna make double digits on a hole. I mean, I mean, Fred couples made a nine. McIntyre made a nine in a hole. And you know, they're them.

[Hank]

Yeah, but I'm different.

[Scott Van Pelt]

You forgot about him. Why exactly. Like, hey, hey, hey, here's some, here's some mushrooms. You want them?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, because, like, tell me when you.

[Hank]

By the way, that was the ultimate, like morning scaries. When I woke up, I was like, I was so not cool about offering Scott mushrooms last night.

[Scott Van Pelt]

It's fine. Everything's good. Everything's good. That was, hey, look, that was the same night I played blackjack with Chris Long, and he had ACE5. And he said, I'm safe. There were a lot of people that were, There are a lot of people that were not necessarily of their right mind. I mean, ace five. Safe. Safe.

[PFT Commenter]

I'm safe.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yeah, maybe safe to be safe. It's important to be safe.

[PFT Commenter]

Last follow up question. So, like, when you play Augusta, because the thing that I, I, I backed my guy PFD because I want to believe in him, but I would say that there's probably a chance that those greens are nothing like anything we've ever seen, where it's like, you think you hit one two feet away and it just keeps rolling. Is that fair to say?

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yes, I will say this. I didn't 3 putt when I played here, which was a bit shocking. But the problem for me was, and I'm not gonna do the single worst thing that people do in golf where they take you shot by shot through the round. That guy sucks.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, hey, I'm on seven.

[Scott Van Pelt]

I had a little buttercut, and I was stuck in the rough, and I saw, I hit a seven iron. I thought I got there, but I'm in the bunker.

[Hank]

Hanks on the edge of his seat, by the way.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, please kill.

[Scott Van Pelt]

Yeah, please kill me. I, But I was constantly on and three, so I'm two putting for bogey. But I never three putted. I mean, they're really fast. But the main thing is you just end up in places where there's nothing you can do. You have to be. So you can't putt really aggressively towards the hole because you'll be gone. So, I mean, listen, if your only goal was to break 110, but twice, twice in 10 times, it's just, it's so much harder than you think.

[PFT Commenter]

That's.

[Scott Van Pelt]

That's all I could say is it's so much harder than you think.

[Hank]

I, I speak of Augusta with reverence. I do. I, I respect Augusta national golf course, but I think it's gotten too far now where, where people are doing tricks on it. People are like, you wouldn't break 150.

[Scott Van Pelt]

All right, I know some people down here. I'm gonna see, see if we can, you know, broker. They're probably not going to let you go. Like, it probably can't be content. But maybe we can get you down here on the low and see if we make that happen.

[Hank]

I mean, I mean, I have to

[Scott Van Pelt]

get, I have to get on a plane. Yeah.

[Hank]

Love you, Scott.

[PFT Commenter]

Thank you for doing this. The big Texas sign off and we'll

[Hank]

see you in Vegas.

[PFT Commenter]

We'll see you in Vegas. We can't wait. Bring your sticks. We're gonna play on Sunday.

[Scott Van Pelt]

We got it.

[PFT Commenter]

We got. We got a bunch of tea times.

[Scott Van Pelt]

All right. Hey, Max. You're the best. Good luck. V for Villanova on the way out for my guy. How about that?

[Max]

Best of luck to Maryland.

[Scott Van Pelt]

All right.

[PFT Commenter]

See you, Scott.

[Hank]

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[PFT Commenter]

let's wrap up the show. By the way, we have the full bracket set. Now I know we didn't talk about the west. Okay. Season in the Western Conference finals. So I don't know what the, I don't really know what Denver was doing tonight because they won the game against the spurs and they're the three seed, I believe. Is that right? Let's see the, the actual setup. They are. Yeah, they're the three seed and they're playing the Timberwolves. But now then they would potentially have to play the Spurs. I don't know. It's going to be hard. Anyway, it's. I, I think the, the winner was OKC tonight because Denver, if they had lost tonight, they could have gone down to four.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

And then the, the Thunder would have maybe had to play Denver in the second round. Now the Thunder don't have to meet the Nuggets or Spurs until the Western Conference final.

[Hank]

You don't have to worry about anything.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, second round Spurs, Nuggets would be awesome. But I'm not going to doubt, I'm not going to, I'm not going to count out the Timberwolves because I feel like that happens every year. Good.

[Hank]

Second round OKC Houston be interesting.

[PFT Commenter]

I think OKC would have, would make light work of that. I think they're better than the Rockets, but. Yeah.

[Hank]

Yeah, well, they're definitely better.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

I said it would be interesting.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, it would be. Or possibly I can't wait for the Lakers to lose to the Rockets in five games. Everyone be like, man, that was the, that was the best five game series we've ever seen.

[Hank]

It's gonna be tough for them to do that if they don't have like two of their best players.

[PFT Commenter]

LeBron. LeBron versus KD though will be fun. Nuggets, Timberwolves, that there's like real, you know, history there the last couple of years. And then the Thunders and Spurs will beat whoever comes out of the playing game. Western Conference, I mean Spurs, Spurs, Nuggets, second round would be awesome. Yeah, awesome. And I feel like they're. Because Wemby, they didn't play like they, he played a lot of games but they didn't, they had him on a minute restriction and they're going to let him go.

[Hank]

You know, and he might. This might be the point of no return for basketball with Wimby, it's like, what do we do to stop this?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. What. Where are we going from here?

[Hank]

This might just be like a look into the future. Like the next 10 years of our lives will be this Wimby that we get in these playoffs.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. I think there was. I saw a stat that Wemby is eligible for all of the awards. Yeah, 65 game. But like Luca is not. And Wemby played, I think like 300 minutes less because they just smart by the Spurs.

[Hank]

Yep.

[PFT Commenter]

Why? Why? Why? Like get them ready for the playoffs. NBA regular season makes. It's just a problem. Okay. We ready for anything else? Ready for numbers three.

[Hank]

Next three seed two Celtics, two seed seven sixers.

[Max]

Seven seed.

[PFT Commenter]

There you go.

[E]

Okay.

[Zach]

6, 24, 78.

[Scott Van Pelt]

23.

[Hank]

45. 45. The percentage that the Capitals have to make. I actually looked that up in my personal estimation.

[PFT Commenter]

Well, in my personal Michael Jordan numbers. That was cool. Yeah. Shout out 23, 45. 12, 51. Anyone?

[Scott Van Pelt]

One more

[PFT Commenter]

like there is a 10 chance. We get it every time.

[Hank]

I know, but we never do.

[PFT Commenter]

Only one person has gotten this year. You have not. No, you said I have gotten the lottery ball this year. No, you have not.

[Scott Van Pelt]

What do you mean?

[Hank]

It. It didn't count?

[PFT Commenter]

No. Three popped up. That was this year.

[Hank]

It didn't count.

[Scott Van Pelt]

It did.

[Hank]

The drawing didn't count. You said that it did not count.

[PFT Commenter]

No, that was the. That was for this machine. 86.

[Hank]

Nope.

[PFT Commenter]

86. 6. I won on that other machine this year. Oh, yeah.

[Hank]

Oh, yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

And nobody else has won this year.

[Hank]

Happy birthday to Brandon Walker. The second best player on the Experts on the Dozen. Dan Campbell. Happy birthday to Dan Campbell. Recurring guest, part of my take. And happy birthday to Bill Crosby. Merit.

[PFT Commenter]

Nice.

[Hank]

Love you guys.

[PFT Commenter]

You nailed it. Didn't leave anyone out?

[Hank]

I don't think so.

[PFT Commenter]

No one?

[Max]

I don't know.

[Hank]

Probably memes. Who do I leave out?

[PFT Commenter]

Thomas Jefferson.

[Hank]

Ah, him.

[Zach]

He was a fraud.

[Hank]

Fraud, fraud. Absolute fraud. Tell me, why'd your university lose his one seed. Bad guy is Thomas Jefferson. Named after

[PFT Commenter]

James Madison University is named after Thomas.

[Hank]

After Thomas Jefferson. Bye, Tom. Had a lot of fun reading notes on the state of Virginia. Love you guys.