Von Miller, Eagles GM Howie Roseman, Mt Rushmore Of Dream Blunt Rotation, Football Is Back + Zac's All Time Fyre Fest

Summary

Pardon My Take – Episode Summary: "Von Miller, Eagles GM Howie Roseman, Mt Rushmore Of Dream Blunt Rotation, Football Is Back + Zac's All Time Fyre Fest"

Release Date: August 8, 2025

In this action-packed episode of "Pardon My Take," hosts Big Cat and PFT Commenter dive deep into a myriad of sports topics, blend in humorous segments, and engage in insightful interviews with notable sports figures. Here's a comprehensive breakdown of the episode's key discussions and highlights.

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1. Football Season Updates and Preseason Insights

The episode kicks off with the hosts discussing the return of football, marking the resurgence of the sport with excitement and anticipation.

• Preseason Highlights: Big Cat and Hank delve into the latest preseason games, emphasizing the quarterback battle between Aaron "AR15" and Daniel Jones in Indianapolis. Unfortunately, AR15 sustains a trigger finger injury early in the game, cutting the contest short.

  • Big Cat (03:19): “When AR15 broke his trigger finger, it was a tough moment for us.”

• Bengals’ Progress: The hosts commend the Cincinnati Bengals for learning from past mistakes, particularly in managing Joe Burrow’s starts during preseason. They highlight Trey Hendrickson's impressive performance, suggesting the Bengals might consider signing him.

  • Hank (04:49): “Tanner McKee looked awesome. He did really, really good.”

2. The Dildos Phenomenon in Sports

A recurring and humorous topic is the bizarre trend of fans throwing dildos onto sports courts.

• WNBA Incident: The episode recounts another instance where a dildo is thrown onto the WNBA court, this time hitting player Sophie Cunningham.

  • Hank (13:20): “Kelsey Plum kicked it off the court, but there was a second dildo that was thrown... one guy got arrested.”

• Speculation on Motives: The hosts speculate that these acts are tied to cryptocurrency schemes, expressing concern over the lengths individuals might go to promote shitcoins.

  • Big Cat (13:59): “This makes me very, very afraid of what people will do to pump a shitcoin.”

3. Smelling Salts Return to the NFL

The discussion shifts to the NFL’s decision to reintroduce smelling salts, which had been previously banned due to concerns over masking concussion symptoms.

• Player Usage: The hosts mention that players are now allowed to bring their own smelling salts from home, ensuring they can still use them responsibly during games.

  • Hank (10:15): “My affiliate link, he drops that in there.”

• Health and Safety: They emphasize the importance of monitoring player health, albeit with a humorous undertone.

  • Big Cat (12:11): “You can't combine ammonia and bleach, so don't do it at home.”

4. Mount Rushmore of Dream Blunt Rotation

In a lighthearted segment, the hosts engage in their traditional "Mount Rushmore" of dream blunt rotation, selecting celebrities they’d love to share a blunt with.

• Top Picks:

  • Big Cat & Hank: Snoop Dogg, for his expertise in providing and rolling blunts.

    • Big Cat (37:00): “He’s going to provide the weed and roll the blunt.”

  • Memes: Adam Sandler, valuing good vibes and comedic presence.

    • Memes (37:57): “Adam Sandler as the ultimate good vibes guy.”

  • Max: Matthew McConaughey and Bill Walton, appreciating storytelling and relaxed energy.

    • Max (38:20): “Bill Walton’s moments make more sense when you’re high.”

  • Zach: Dave Chappelle and Hunter S. Thompson, bringing humor and philosophical depth.

    • Zach (40:07): “Dave Chappelle and Hunter S. Thompson would add a lot to the experience.”

• Honorable Mentions: Participants suggest various other celebrities, including Seth Rogen and Steve Irwin, adding to the playful banter and creativity of the segment.

  • Memes (49:59): “I think we should call him and get, like, why? Helen Keller can't say what she is.”

5. Interviews with Howie Roseman and Von Miller

a. Howie Roseman, Eagles GM

Timestamp: 58:35

Howie Roseman, the General Manager of the Philadelphia Eagles, joins the show to discuss his approach to team building, the importance of grit, and navigating the complexities of the NFL salary cap.

• Defining Grit:

  • Howie Roseman (59:07): “Adversity, you know, you want to see how people are handling adversity, overcoming adversity.”

• Drafting Philosophy:

  • Howie emphasizes drafting players who have consistently improved and shown resilience, citing Jalen Hurts as a prime example of grit and continuous development.

    • Roseman (60:42): “He kept getting better, and there was constant improvement... we picked him in the second round, which was a gift.”

• Salary Cap Management:

  • Discussing the intricacies of the NFL salary cap, Howie highlights the balance between managing financial constraints and acquiring talented players.

    • Roseman (71:35): “It's always about the players. We could do as many creative deals as we want, but we're not going to be any good if we don't have any good players.”

• Personal Growth and Challenges:

  • He shares his personal journey, including a challenging year where he was sidelined but used the time to grow and refine his management skills.

    • Roseman (66:07): “It was humbling... I felt like I had to support the people that counted on me.”

b. Von Miller, Washington Commanders

Timestamp: 103:22

Von Miller, a recurring guest and star linebacker for the Washington Commanders, offers insights into his career, personal growth, and the return of football.

• Defining Grit:

  • Von Miller (103:54): “Grit is about putting in the work—early mornings, late nights, barely eating.”

• Personal Growth and Mindfulness:

  • Von discusses his experiences with ayahuasca and how it has enhanced his self-awareness and approach to both football and life.

    • Von Miller (117:08): “It creates awareness about everything in your life. It was life-changing for me.”

• Performance and Health:

  • Emphasizing the importance of staying healthy and maintaining a sharp mindset, Von reflects on his training and the support from his coaches and teammates.

    • Von Miller (108:51): “I'm still trying to get back to playing my style of football. I’m healthy and getting sharper.”

• Team Dynamics and Mentorship:

  • He highlights the significance of mentorship within the team, citing Coach Pagano's influence on his performance and approach.

    • Von Miller (110:14): “We need to have the best team we possibly can. If we’re working with young pass rushers, that’s cool. If not, we adapt.”

6. Baseball Team Performances

The hosts provide updates on Major League Baseball teams, focusing on the struggles of the New York Yankees and the underperformance of the New York Mets.

• Yankees’ Decline:

  • They critique the Yankees for altering their facial hair policy and grooming standards, suggesting it led to a decline in performance.

    • Big Cat (17:41): “The Yankees should go back to a manager that doesn't manage just off a spreadsheet.”

• Mets' Struggles:

  • The discussion points out the Mets' poor hitting performance, leading to significant losses and a potential need to fire their hitting coach.

    • Hank (19:22): “They can't hit. They need to fire their hitting coach.”

• Brewers and Blue Jays:

  • In contrast, the Brewers are praised for their consistent winning, and the Blue Jays are noted for their strong performance as well.

    • Big Cat (18:43): “The Brewers do just never lose. It's crazy. They never lose.”

7. Golf Segments and Fire Fest Highlights

A humorous exchange about the hosts’ golf experiences and competitions adds levity to the episode.

• Golf Rivalry:

  • Big Cat recounts a bunker practice session where PFT Commenter struggles with bunker shots, leading to playful frustration.

    • Hank (132:08): “He didn’t know how to hit out of a bunker.”

• Fire Fest Recaps:

  • The hosts discuss their recent participation in local golf events, with playful banter about winning and losing against each other both on and off camera.

    • Hank (128:58): “We played nine holes. It wasn't a competition. It was just for practice. But PFT beat me.”

8. Supporting Segments and Advertisements

Throughout the episode, listeners are engaged with brief promotional segments, including offers from DraftKings Sportsbook, Game Time for ticketing, Truly Unruly Hard Seltzer, Aura Frames for digital picture frames, and Wayfair for home essentials. These segments are seamlessly integrated without interrupting the flow of content.

• Notable Promotions:

  • Big Cat (02:19): “Download the DraftKings sportsbook app and use code TAKE to get $200 in bonus bets.”

  • Hank (129:52): “Brought to you by Wayfair. Refresh your workspace with desks, bookcases, and office chairs for way less.”

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Key Takeaways and Conclusions

• Resilience and Grit: Both interviews with Howie Roseman and Von Miller emphasize the critical role of resilience and grit in sports, highlighting how overcoming adversity shapes successful careers and teams.

• Team Building Strategies: Howie Roseman's insights into drafting and salary cap management provide a glimpse into the complexities of assembling a competitive NFL team, while Von Miller underscores the importance of personal well-being and mentorship.

• Humorous Interludes: The playful segments, including the Mount Rushmore of Dream Blunt Rotation and golf banter, showcase the hosts’ camaraderie and ability to blend humor with sports commentary effectively.

• Ongoing Sports Trends: Discussions on the peculiar trend of dildos being thrown into sports events and the return of smelling salts reflect the dynamic and sometimes unexpected nature of the sports world.

Overall, this episode of "Pardon My Take" offers a rich blend of serious sports analysis, engaging interviews, and entertaining segments, making it a must-listen for fans seeking both depth and humor in their sports talk.

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Notable Quotes:

• Howie Roseman (59:07): “Adversity, you know, you want to see how people are handling adversity, overcoming adversity.”

• Von Miller (103:54): “Grit is about putting in the work—early mornings, late nights, barely eating.”

• Big Cat (37:00): “He’s going to provide the weed and roll the blunt.”

• Hank (19:22): “They can't hit. They need to fire their hitting coach.”

• PFT Commenter (112:17): “Out of my 129 sacks, sacks, 90, 95. 90, 95 sacks have come off some type of speed to power element.”

• Zach (142:39): “I thought I was going to win on Monday night, and it got a little out of hand.”

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This summary encapsulates the essence of the episode, capturing the blend of insightful sports discussions, engaging interviews, and the hosts' signature humor, all while adhering to the structure and guidelines provided.

Transcript

[Big Cat]

Hey, pardon my take listeners. You can find every episode on Apple podcasts, Spotify or YouTube Prime. Members can listen ad free on Amazon Music.

[PFT Commenter]

Get the crew together and head off.

[Big Cat]

To the course in the new 2024 Chevy Traverse with impressive cargo room, three room seating and the first ever Z71.

[PFT Commenter]

Trim Traverse can handle your buddies and.

[Big Cat]

Their golf bags with ease. Chevrolet together. Let's let's drive on today's part of my take. We've got a two for for the people we have Eagles GM Howie Roseman. Awesome interview with him. Sit down, talk about how to build the team. Haven't you know we've interviewed Brandon Bean, Ryan Poles. Not a ton of GMs. This was a really good one. And then we have our good friend recurring guest Von Miller from the Washington Commanders. That is the actually, no it's not the end of our great week interviews because we have Travis Pastrana coming on Monday. We also have the Mount Rushmore of Dream Blunt rotation. We're going to talk a little football because we had some preseason games, smelling salts. We had another dildo hit the floor in the wnba. We have Fire Fest and it's all brought to you by our friends at DraftKings. The dog days of summer means it's time for the boys of summer to kick it into gear. And the best way to cash in on your baseball IQ is with DraftKings Sportsbook. As the stretch drive begins, DraftKings Sportsbook has you covered with live betting, home run props, odd boosts and more. Whether you're chasing dingers or jumping in mid game, there's always action to be had. Never been on baseball before. It's simple. Pick a guy to go yard, hammer some live odds mid game or just ride with your squad and hope for the best. No spreadsheets, just vibes and dingers. Here's something special for first timers. New DraftKings customers bet $5. Get $200 in bonus bets instantly. Download the DraftKings sportsbook app. Use code TAKE. That's code TAKE for new customers to get $200 in bonus bets instantly. When you bet just five bucks only on DraftKings, the crown is your gambling problem. Call 1-800- gambler in New York. Call 8778-HOPENY or text hopeny467-369 in Connecticut. Help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org Please play.

[PFT Commenter]

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[Big Cat]

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[Hank]

Void.

[PFT Commenter]

In Ontario, bonus bets expire seven days after issuance. For additional terms and responsible gaming resources, see DKNG.

[Big Cat]

Day. Let's go. Welcome to part of my take presented by DraftKings. Download the DraftKings sportsbook app and use code TAKE. That's code TAKE. For new customers. Get $200 in bonus bets instantly when you bet just five bucks only on DraftKings. The crown is yours. Today is Friday, August 8th, and in the words of my good friend at Zach Cornelius, underscore, football is back. Our boys.

[Hank]

First I heard say it.

[Big Cat]

Yes, yes.

[Hank]

Hard knocks get hard knocked. And we had some preseason football. Thursday was exciting. We got to see a quarterback battle for the ages between AR15 and Daniel Jones and Indy. It lasted just a couple plays until AR15 broke his trigger finger.

[Big Cat]

Yes, yes, that was bad, by the way. I. I know this sounds lame, but, like, it. It did kind of like my heart got bigger. I was like the Grinch when the heart gets bigger. When I saw Zach tweet football is back, it's like, he's. He's one of us now. He's finally.

[Hank]

He gets it.

[Big Cat]

Everyone except one of us on this show right now is football is back guy. There's only one of us out, one outlier who mocks the football is back.

[Hank]

You know what that was? That was his welcome to the NFL moment.

[Big Cat]

What are you looking for, Hank? What?

[Max]

Sorry, there's something. Something going on behind me.

[Big Cat]

You're just looking around. Yeah, it was welcome to the NFL moment. So. All right, we're on Zoom for the start of the show and for fire fest, we did in studio for Mount Rushmore and obviously our interviews. Yeah, we have. We have some football to talk about. The only thing I really noted was, I know obviously you shouldn't take a lot out of the preseason games, but the Bengals finally learning from all their, like, really bad starts and being like, hey, maybe we should have Joe Burrow starting these preseason games. Smart by them. And Trey Hendrickson just saw dollar bills all night because Tanner McKee looked awesome. And the Bengals are going to probably want to have to sign Trey Hendrickson.

[Hank]

You kind of glossed over the fact that Tanner McKee looked awesome, though. He did really, really good. Tanner McKee is that dude. I could see him starting in the NFL.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, this is. I love. I love this part of the. The season when we just get excited about guys that are like, if they actually had to play week one, it would be an abject failure. But during, you know, TREY Lance, Tanner McGee, McKee like, these are guys that we can get excited about in August, right?

[Hank]

No, Matt, Max is right. Tanner McKee. I. I would not be dismayed to see him starting week one.

[Big Cat]

No, no, I'm not saying dismayed. I'm saying he would not be good.

[Hank]

Disagree.

[Big Cat]

Okay. Yeah. Joe Milton. Joe Milton. Cowboys fans are doing the entire. Joe Milton threw a ball really, really far. And Cowboy fans are now saying that Joe Milton is going to be the heir apparent. Like, I actually saw someone honestly say this is the first time Dak has had pressure on him with a backup in the last 10 years. And it's just like, okay, I guess if Joe Milton's pressure. Sure.

[Hank]

He is pressure. Joe Mills. Joe Milton is a definition of pressure. I don't know if you saw the interview that he did. He was riding in the golf cart, and the woman that was interviewing him said, so, Joe, obviously you threw an orange over 100 yards. That's how she let off the interview, which is awesome.

[Big Cat]

Yes.

[Hank]

And then she says, what's the farthest thing that you've ever thrown? He said, it's probably a golf ball. I was at topgolf. I threw a golf ball, and it basically hit the back net, which is 225 yards.

[Big Cat]

Jesus.

[Hank]

So actually Big T, because he's my Joe Milton consigliere, having been like, the original survivor of the Joe Milton experience. Tennessee. Not original. Yeah, but he did. He did. He did survive.

[Big Cat]

Because I actually remember talking to Big T when Joe Milton went to Tennessee. I was like, he. He's not going to be good. And he thought that he was going to be good.

[Hank]

We all. We all know what we're signing up for for Joe Milton, but I feel like he might have taken that next step. But Big T actually ran the numbers on this. He said, let's see, to throw a golf ball 200 yards, you'd have to throw it 95 miles per hour at the ideal launch angle. So Joe Milton threw a golf ball 95. I honestly think if you can throw a golf ball 200 yards, you could probably break 90 on a golf course just throwing the ball.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, definitely.

[Hank]

Like, he might be.

[Big Cat]

That's not even a hot take.

[Hank]

No. What would that put you at? Probably, like around 80. You could probably break 80. Maybe. Like, I go him one on Grandpa Golf.

[Max]

With your arm.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. If you just. Just throw it right in the middle every time. I mean, the putting would. We saw what could happen with the putting could be a challenge, and accuracy around the greens could be a challenge.

[Hank]

Him one on one With Tony Romo, where he just throws the ball would be a match I would watch. But yeah, Max, I, I'm with you, man. I, I would even say the Eagles should think about starting Tanner.

[Memes]

That's wrong. But Tanner McKee has already played the Cowboys and he's already beaten the Cowboys. So if you were to play Week 1 against the Cowboys, we've already seen a sample size of him winning that football game.

[Big Cat]

Okay. So he would be fine. Would you feel Good if Tanner McKee was starting the entire season? Okay. I rest my case.

[Hank]

Was starting week one against Joe Milton on the Cowboys.

[Big Cat]

Joe.

[Memes]

Mel. Joe. You know I'm a big Joe Milton.

[Hank]

I know. I love that.

[Memes]

I, I. And it sucks that the two biggest Joe Milton guys on this podcast are the two biggest Cowboy haters. It's such that he's on the Cowboys, but Joe Milton, that is absolutely slinging it.

[Big Cat]

I.

[Memes]

He should be, he should be a starting quarterback in the NFL.

[Big Cat]

He should be on the Dolphins. Yeah.

[Hank]

Tyreek would instantly be happy.

[Memes]

You just would be awesome.

[Hank]

Tyreek, you just run straight. Let Joe throw the ball as far as he possibly can every single play.

[Big Cat]

It's. I mean, whenever someone talks about Joe Milton, it's like, it's like an old person trying to give advice to the youth. Like you guys. You guys are just to make the same dumb mistakes that I made when I thought Joe Milton was going to be really good at Michigan and then Tennessee. And it's like, that's fine, but you can't do anything to change it.

[Hank]

You act like I didn't watch Joe Milton in college at Michigan and at.

[Big Cat]

That he's not good.

[Hank]

I know full well what the.

[Big Cat]

Joe Milton, you should not be excited about him. 0. You should 0% be excited about him or think he could. He could go for the job.

[Hank]

I'm sorry that I'm romantic about the deep ball.

[Big Cat]

The. The deep ball's awesome. The 75 yard bomb was so sick. I watched it like five times. But it's just. That's it.

[Memes]

But it could be fun. Like quarterback.

[Big Cat]

But. But I don't think anyone in the NFL, they wouldn't allow it because it's. It would be fun and then really bad and the really bad would outweigh the fun and then they would take. No coach does that. That's why we have, like, the same backups all the time.

[Hank]

What if he just stops the really bad stuff, though?

[Big Cat]

I don't know. Can he throw softer? He didn't think about can he throw softer? I don't Think he can throw softer?

[Hank]

He should throw left handed on touch passes.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Or just like he should do. You should teach him rugby passes. Yeah, Rugby passes for. For any screens would be perfect. All right, what else? What else do we have? I mean there's the. I'm trying to think Michael Parsons now has a fake injury. So that's where we're at with that. Smelling salts are back. That was, that was a. So we. I feel. I'm happy for George Kittle. Did you guys see also Levante David said that he has take. He has hit the smelling salts for every Single Drive for 13 years in the NFL. That's a lot of smelling salts. Yeah, but it's. The NFL clarified the n. The teams aren't allowed to give out the smelling salts, but players are allowed to use smelling salts.

[Hank]

You can bring your own from home.

[Big Cat]

This is probably Roger Goodell just figuring out a way like he's. He's getting a promo code from Amazon because I'm sure they're going to be sold out of smelling salts.

[Hank]

Yeah. My affiliate link, he drops that in there. It's.

[Big Cat]

It.

[Hank]

It was like a. I don't know if it was a point of confusion if somebody got the wires crossed or if Cadel just decided like, I don't need the uprising. I deal with enough. I don't have to deal with players being pissed about smelling salts all the time. But I'm glad that they fixed it. I'm glad that they turned it around and yeah, we should get back in the smelling salt game here. In part of my take, I'm actually, I'm get. I'm getting a big shipment for the boys.

[Big Cat]

So you're paying.

[Memes]

I also bought a big shipment for the boys. Forgot that we weren't going to be in the studio today. Hand it out.

[Big Cat]

Goodell definitely figured the way that he is getting he probably. If you go deep enough, he has a shell company that just bought all the stock in. In smelling salts and ammonia. He's got. Yeah, he's got the only tap to like the natural resource is ammonia. Even a natural resource. I don't even know what the fuck ammonia is.

[Hank]

I think probably. Yeah, that's probably like in a DuPont chemical factory that they make overseas somewhere.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, it's run off. Yeah. So what is ammonia? That's. Is that what's in smelling salts?

[Hank]

Ammonia inhalant? Yeah, it's a. It's a chemical compound.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Hank]

I learned a valuable lesson one time though is cleaning up a fridge when I was like 18 years old and I Was like, oh, here's ammonia. That cleans stuff. Oh, I've got bleach here that cleans stuff. Let me go ahead and use them and clean up this fridge. Started to get a nasty headache, and I had to back away from the fridge. Turns out I could have died. It makes, like. It makes, like, mustard gas, so don't combine those two.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I'm reading ammonia right now, and I don't know if, like, anyone would read this and then be like, hey, I want some ammonia. A colorless gas with a pungent, suffocating odor. It's a crucial industrial chemical widely used in fertilizers, refrigeration, and various chemical manufacturing processes. So, yeah, it's just. It's just runoff from every factory in America. Yeah.

[Hank]

I'm glad that they brought it back, though. That was the absolute right call. I also got something a little bit wrong when I was talking about the NFL's reason for why they banned it. I thought that they had banned ammonia inhalants because there's studies that show that they mimic the results of a concussion, but that's not true. The reason why they banned it originally was because it's been shown that it can mask.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Symptoms of an actual concussion, which you think. No, duh.

[Big Cat]

That's what I was saying. The Josh Allen Texans game. Yeah, that was the. That was the moment where they were like, oh, he got concussed, and then he just hit the smelling salts and was back in. Maybe we shouldn't do this. But it's back.

[Hank]

Our long national nightmare is over.

[Big Cat]

That was. That was a quick 24 hours of freaking out. Okay, what else do we have? Because there's.

[Hank]

We got more going on.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, More dildos. Should we talk about the dildos?

[Hank]

We can talk about it. It was right after we taped.

[Big Cat]

Almost, like, instantly, within five seconds after we taped another dildo hit the floor.

[Hank]

I thought about hitting you guys up and be like, should we hop back on and. And add extra dildo talk? But there's one dildo that hit the court. I think it hit Sophie Cunningham.

[Big Cat]

I think it did as well.

[Hank]

Kelsey Plum kicked it off the court. But then the real story was there was a second dildo that was thrown. Oh, that did. That did not hit the court. There were simultaneous dildo throws. Only one struck the court. So we're three for four. Some say that that other dildo was meant for the Capitol building, but it didn't make it all the way there. But there was one guy that got arrested afterwards, and I think he's Charged with a bunch of stuff. And, and he might be involved in some sort of shitcoin scheme. And that's what the dildos were doing, which makes all the sense in the world, but it also makes me very, very afraid of what people will do to pump a shitcoin.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Did you see how far people will take something past where we're at right now?

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Did you see there was a dildo to MLB game as well? The green dildo. They were doing that. It was, it was right behind home plate where Marlin's man. It wasn't Marlin's man. He wears orange, but his name is.

[Hank]

The Silly Fanat Big Cat. And put some respect on.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, the. I agree. As soon as I saw coins, I was like, I think I'm out on the dildos. And also I, I might have been out on the third anyway, because it was, it was funny. It's kind of like the Buffalo Bills one. The, the, the, the dildozer who we did a documentary about. It's funny in a one off situation. And then the second one, you're like, okay, this is kind of funny. And then if it just keeps happening, it's just a bunch of people copying someone who did it. That was funny. And now that it might be a shitcoin guy, now it's not even funny. Yeah.

[Hank]

I miss when people would throw dildos for the love of the game.

[Big Cat]

Right.

[Hank]

And just for profit.

[Big Cat]

Right. Because they wanted, they wanted to do. They thought a dildo was funny. Now they're just using, they're using these dildos incorrectly.

[Hank]

Yeah. To us.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Right. With the coins they're gonna rug pull us.

[Hank]

The, the funniest, the funniest possibility for the third dildo, if it was going to be funny would be if it was a suction cup dildo and they had thrown it and it had stuck to the backboard.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

And then somebody would have to like get up on a ladder and try to like pull it off with their hand. That would have been fun. Especially if the dildo is lubed. And then they couldn't get the dildo off the bat and they kept having to try to grab and pull the dildo, jerk it.

[Big Cat]

Or if there was a way that you could have the dildo like hit the floor and it's a purple dildo or black dildo. But then the minute it hits the floor, it then turns the green so you're like, oh, this. The person didn't even get the right. Oh, it's a transforming dildo. It's now lime green. Yeah.

[Hank]

Or if the WNBA had leaned into it and been like, if a dildo hits the floor in the fourth quarter, everybody in attendance gets free Chicken McNuggets.

[Big Cat]

That would work.

[Hank]

That would have been good, too.

[Big Cat]

By the way, I think there was free chicken nuggets at the Ravens game tonight because there was a doink, which is awesome.

[Hank]

Oh, I like that.

[Big Cat]

Also, I saw that the Ravens. Because this is the. The part of the season where, you know, the local announcers get their shine because they get to call the preseason games. I think he's a legend in Baltimore, so it's no shot at him. And it's with a G. But their announcer is Jerry Sandusky.

[Hank]

Yep.

[Big Cat]

You got to change that. You got to. Or you got to really pronounce the Gary Sandusky. Yeah, yeah, it's got to be Gary. You got to just be like. Or it's like, Jerry. Jerry Sandusky with a G and just kind of throw it in.

[Hank]

Yeah. I think there. I could see his point of view when he's like, why should I change my name? He's the one that sucks. Like an office space. But this guy really sucks.

[Big Cat]

Right. Remember that? There was that guy who. Who was running. Was he running for some type of public office maybe in New York, and his name was Harvey Epstein? Yeah. It's like, dude, how could. How do you not figure? You got to change something here, man. It was right in between the Harvey Epstein. Jeff or Harvey Weinstein. Jeff Epstein. And it was just like, come on, man. Figure it out. Middle names got to work.

[Hank]

Got to move on from that.

[Big Cat]

His middle names, Adolf.

[Hank]

There's also a emerging story. If we want to talk a little seam, we want to talk a little baseball. Yankees. Yikes.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, they stink.

[Hank]

Things are bad for the Yankees, and Yankees fans are just. They. They're at their wit's end right now, and it's. It's sad, and I hate to draw a line to this, but the year where they decide to change their entire facial hair policy and grooming standards, things go downhill. Like the Yankees. They should go back.

[Big Cat]

Yes, they should go back. And you know what they should also do is go back to a manager that doesn't manage just off a spreadsheet. Feel like that's run its course. I feel like Aaron Boone's been the manager for 20 years now, and every year, it's Yankees fans, rightfully so. Being like, this guy is just managing off a spreadsheet. And it's not. No vibes they need. They might need to Bring back the no facial hair and Joe Tory. All, all in the same. Joe Tory's like barely alive, but just put them on the bench and have them go off, off vibes. Yeah.

[Hank]

I mean, jazz chisel them on the bases. That was.

[Big Cat]

That was tough to watch.

[Hank]

Really bad example for all the youngsters out there.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Really, really, really bad. We. Yeah, the Yankees. I, I also, I know this is just going to make everyone, all the, all the sickos and perverts happy, but the brewers do just never lose. I said it on Wednesday. And they still. They don't lose. They never lose. It's crazy. This team never loses. And the Mets almost got no hit, which was.

[Memes]

Yeah. I was going to say there's another team in New York who's also playing pretty bad right now.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. What are. The Mets are 2 and 8 in their last 10 and the Yankees are 4 and 6. So a little bit better. But memes, what's going on? They can't hit. They got to fire their hitting coach. You guys, you guys have an awesome lineup.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

But every, every single person has just.

[Hank]

Forgot how to hit.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. That happened. It's like everybody, everybody but Pete right now. Pizza stud.

[Hank]

But it just.

[Big Cat]

Everybody else just nobody could hit. That's. That's happening to the Cubs too. I mean, they hit a couple on Wednesday, but it's. They're just all striking out and then they're playing the brewers this weekend and then they never lose baseball. They never lose.

[Hank]

Can you explain this to me with, with PCA and the Cubs? Yeah. Some Cubs fans are not happy that the crowd continues to chant MVP at pca because they think that it makes him chase a lot of pitches.

[Big Cat]

No, not mvp. Pca. They champ. So they haven't been chanting. At least. I was at the game on Monday night and there was no he, which is another thing because council gave him a day off and then pinch hit him in the fifth and then kept him in for the rest of the game, which, like give the. The guys lost. Give him a day off. There was no mvp. It was PCA chance. But he is struck out. It feels like a billion times in the last week. And he's been chasing and lunging and he had a visible like, like one of the loudest after popping out in maybe the sixth or seventh inning on Wednesday. We did have an immaculate inning, though. Yeah. That was cool. You guys see it?

[Hank]

Yeah, it was cool. It was cool.

[Big Cat]

But it was very cool.

[Hank]

I did hear that, that Cubs fans, maybe they've changed. Maybe they decided, okay, absolutely no more MVP chance because you're making him chase these pitches.

[Big Cat]

I. The PCA chants keep happening. The mvp. I did not hear it all on Monday, and I don't think I heard it the last two days.

[Hank]

Okay.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, it's been bad. It's been bad. This is the. This is a part of baseball season that every. I mean, if you have a team that's in it or like around in it, it's just torture because every. It's 162 games, but you just. Every game feels so like life or death. And every game, like, if you lose two in a row, you're like, this team's never going to win again. And you have to. You have to do big picture, but it's impossible to do big picture at this point of the season. Yeah.

[Hank]

Yeah. You just want September to get here.

[Big Cat]

Right. And you want to just win series Max. How's that? How are you feeling?

[Memes]

I feel. I feel pretty good. I mean, the Phillies keep winning series, but then not sweeping. So if that's my biggest worry right now at this point, at this point of the year, that's okay.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, the. The. The Phillies. Yeah, the Phillies. It feels like they're staying consistent while the Mets are falling. The other. We also should shout out the Blue Jays. They also never lose. They never lose. They're. They're very good as well. I'm excited for playoff baseball. I think it's gonna be awesome.

[Hank]

Me too. Should we talk any. Slater.

[Big Cat]

What do we. What do we got?

[Hank]

Rashawn Slater.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Towards patella tendon. That's.

[Big Cat]

That sucked.

[Hank]

You also just want to fast forward to the. The right. We all want football to be here officially official. But that sucks for the Chargers because he's a beast.

[Big Cat]

It. Injuries in the preseason are just especially cruel because we've talked about this before. You don't. You don't get to see it. And I know that sounds up, but like, just follow. Follow along my thought process. You don't get to see it. You just get a Schefter tweet that says your key player is being carted off. And then you have the hour or two where you hope for the best. But no, deep down it could be really bad. You're hoping like, hey, maybe it's just a sprained boo boo on his. On his. On his big toe. And. And all the, all the hateful things I said to my co workers seems ridiculous in hindsight because it was not a big deal, but you know, deep down, it probably is going to be a season ender. And that happened to the Chargers, which is massive, I think. Also did CJ Gardner Johnson tears ACL as.

[Hank]

No, it is not torn.

[Big Cat]

Oh, it's not.

[Hank]

Yeah, he hurt his knee, but it's not acl.

[Big Cat]

Okay, so is he out for the year?

[Hank]

I don't think so.

[Memes]

They don't know yet.

[Shane]

They said they.

[Memes]

That it's injured, but they don't know the extent of the injury yet.

[Big Cat]

Got it.

[Hank]

But they said that it's not acl.

[Big Cat]

Got it.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Memes]

Not acl.

[Big Cat]

That's the worst, though, to be just sitting there because, again, it's. It's fucked up to say, but, like, not being able to see it and process it live when it happens, live during a game. You can process it and be like, oh, maybe it's not that bad. You know, right away. Like. Like, this is either really, really bad, or it might be okay. When you just get the tweet, your mind goes to the worst possible place and then you just spend. Did you see? There was also, like, there was a rumor just going around that Garrett Nussmeier towards acl, which I don't think was true. But, like, this is what happens this time of year because we don't have eyes on all of this. And then anyone can just say anything, and then you just expect the worst.

[Hank]

I just know that patella tendon is. I think that's the. The most painful of the knee injuries. That might be, like, the most painful. Common sports injury is the patella.

[Big Cat]

Brutal. And then. And then you get. And then you get sports medicine. Doc, whatever his name is. What's his name? David Chow. David Chow. He gets the practice footage, and that's how I saw it. He was like Chargers fans. Not good.

[Shane]

All right.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Well, that's brutal.

[Hank]

They said Anthony Richardson just dislocated his pinky, so he should be fine.

[Big Cat]

Okay. Who needs a pinky?

[Hank]

But I've never seen as many people just commenting on a preseason game in general. But, like, right after an injury, I saw, like, every NFL expert being like, here's why. This is actually Anthony Richardson's fault. That he got hurt, like, immediately. No. Like, no thoughts and prayers. No. As a Giants fan, it was just straight up, like, this was a dog shit play by Anthony Richardson. He's gotta be better.

[Big Cat]

It wasn't the play that. That he got sacked. Right.

[Hank]

I think it was.

[Big Cat]

Oh, it was where it was just a free rusher off the edge. Yeah. He didn't see him.

[Hank]

He should have gone hot route. According to at least Jeff Schwartz and many other People.

[Big Cat]

Okay, got it. Do we have. Is Shane here? Hey, Shane, can you hear me? Yeah. How you feeling?

[Zach]

Not good. Not good at all.

[Big Cat]

All right. Not good. All right. That was Shane, our Chargers fan.

[Hank]

I think that says it all.

[Zach]

Well, early on in the day, I.

[Big Cat]

Was just, like, praying that you went through the emotions.

[Zach]

Well, I was like, oh, it's not an ACL injury. Like, he'll be fine.

[Hank]

He'll be back.

[Zach]

And then to wishing it was an ACL injury, like, this is the worst thing that can happen. There's been like, no player that's gone back to 100 off this ever again.

[Big Cat]

Ever.

[Hank]

It's bad.

[Zach]

I forget the stats.

[Big Cat]

I think it's like, thank God he got paid.

[Hank]

There was one dude that tore both of them at the same time a couple years ago.

[Big Cat]

Wait, you're not happy he got paid?

[Hank]

I mean, for what?

[Big Cat]

But. I mean, obviously. But, like, it's good that he. Like, this is the NFL, but the NFL is how they do contracts. Like, this is a. If he hadn't gotten this huge contract, I'd feel awful. Awful for him. And like, at least he got paid. I know that's hard for a Chargers fan to see, but from someone unbiased, outside of it, like, I'm happy the player got paid.

[Zach]

Well, yeah, I'm happy.

[Big Cat]

Personally, I would have preferred.

[Zach]

Yeah, I would have preferred him to have gotten paid and played at the same time.

[Big Cat]

Agree. We agree.

[Hank]

But your brain went straight to cat Consideration.

[Big Cat]

Take his money back.

[Zach]

I don't know how it works against, like, the cap. If he's injured. Like, I don't know if we can get a good player, like, next off season. Like, he might not even. I don't know what the. The timeline is, but he might not even, like, play the beginning of next.

[Hank]

Year or next year at all.

[Big Cat]

Wait, it's that long of an injury?

[Hank]

Yeah, it's pretty bad.

[Zach]

I know. It's like J.C. jackson had the same injury and we know what happened to him.

[Shane]

So.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Hank]

Like, depending on, like, if it's fully ruptured. Yeah, it could. It could be over a year.

[Big Cat]

Yes.

[Zach]

So I don't know how that affects.

[Big Cat]

Because he's.

[Zach]

I forget what his contract was. It was a four year extension. 130 million or something like that. 100 million guaranteed. So I don't know.

[Hank]

There should be a rule that if you, if you get injured, like, right after signing a contract, that some of it doesn't count towards the cap.

[Zach]

I mean, I hope not, but are you happy on the field?

[Hank]

Are you pretty sure he's getting money.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. All right. Seems like a good guy. Yeah. I'm pretty sure there was a rule. They had to change it. I think it might have been after Len Bias, but, like, if you. If a player died, he still counted against the cap and they might have changed it after which. That's heavy. That's some heavy ass. Yeah.

[Hank]

Do you want.

[Big Cat]

Oh, do we think Amario Hampton? I know the boys were pumping me up because it's brutal for the Amario Hampton bet.

[Zach]

I mean, the good thing is, like, Joe Wall was like a natural left tackle, so that mean.

[Big Cat]

There we go.

[Zach]

It's good in that standpoint.

[Big Cat]

But I mean, Rashawn Slater's awesome. Yeah.

[Zach]

He was the highest paid tackle in NFL history, so.

[Big Cat]

And you wish he didn't get 11 days counting.

[Hank]

What's the rule that, like, if your entire team dies, you get to do some sort of, like, special redraft?

[Big Cat]

Yeah, there's the. There's like the cat, you know, cat, I can't speak. Yeah. Or something like that. There's some rule because remember there was a guy on Reddit who was like, what if. What if our entire team dies and we can just redraft because they were like so bad. It's like a certain amount of players die. They can. You basically get an expansion team. I don't know what exactly it is, but. So 11 days. So you got paid. How much was it guaranteed?

[Zach]

I think it was 100 million guaranteed.

[Shane]

Wow.

[Hank]

Oh, they call it a disaster.

[Big Cat]

Disaster. Okay. That's a lot easier of a word. It's been a long week. What? Tell us the rules.

[Hank]

I'm trying to look it up right now. In the event that a team disaster did occur, each of the four major professional sports leagues has a contingency plan. Major League Baseball remain tight lipped about its plan. They have a confidential disaster draft. So they're saying, we do have a plan, but we won't tell you what the plan is. Sounds like they don't have a plan.

[Big Cat]

This is like the eighth overtime in a Stanley cup final game.

[Hank]

Yeah, but. Yeah, so mlb, the NFL plan refers to a near disaster as a common accident in which a team loses fewer than 15 players. A disaster occurs when more than 15 players are lost. What do they get to do? They would be required to play out the season, though. They would have priority on every waiver claim. Okay, great.

[Big Cat]

Sick. Look at the waiver claims. All right, Shane, listen. Spin zone. Better now than like in the playoff push. I guess that. No, that's a fact. If you're going to have an injury, you'd rather have it before the trade deadline, before the season starts. Enough time to get your team ready. Like, you know, continuity on the line. You don't want injuries, but if you had to pick a time, it'd be this then December.

[Hank]

Yeah, I guess. Prayers.

[Big Cat]

Okay. Yeah.

[Hank]

But if it happens late in the season, you automatically get the first pick in the NFL draft.

[Zach]

We could just tank on the season.

[Hank]

Wait, if, if the disaster kicks in.

[Big Cat]

Oh, no, I was just talking about the injury. I was talking about the injury, not the disaster. Yeah, get Arch and not, not for another two years.

[Hank]

Oh, that's right. Yeah.

[Big Cat]

I mean, his, his Grant, his grandpa has shown that this is, this is the plan. They. Those Mannings, he's gonna wait, I think.

[Hank]

Do you think he would let Arch play for the Chargers?

[Big Cat]

Yeah. For Harbaugh? Yeah. And it's LA now. I think that, I think that would change things. Yeah, I think that would change things. Okay. Anything else before we get to ourselves? Back in studio for the Mount Rushmore. I'm trying to think. I'm just looking real quick if we missed any big stories. Oh, the Heat security guard. That guy's a scumbag, but he made a lot of money. Did you guys see that?

[Hank]

No. What'd that guy do?

[Big Cat]

He. There's a Heat security guard who was just stealing jerseys for like five years and he sold the jerseys for like $2 million plus. He. Among the items, a game worn LeBron James NBA Finals jersey was reportedly sold by Perez for around a hundred thousand dollars and later auctioned for 3.7 million. So he was just, he was just stealing all their jerseys and then reselling them.

[Hank]

I don't, I don't mind the hustle.

[Big Cat]

Kind of a perfect crime until you get caught.

[Hank]

Yep.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Former Miami Heat security guard appeared in federal court accused of stealing hundreds of pieces of team memorabilia. He's accused of using his special access to the equipment room to steal nearly 400 game worn jerseys, 100 of which he sold for about $2 million.

[Hank]

Sounds like it was a victimless crime.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I mean, how did they find him? Did that was someone. Was LeBron like, hey, where. That's. I've been looking for that jersey.

[Hank]

Yeah. I don't know, but I mean, if he was able to get away with it for years, then nobody was really that wigged out about it.

[PFT Commenter]

So.

[Hank]

Let the man sell, let the man grind. Gotta have a side hustle.

[Big Cat]

I just imagine that guy was probably. He was probably just wearing like an NBA Finals Ray Allen jersey just walking around his house. Yeah, because you can't. Like he probably couldn't. He had to sell it on the black market. Then it went on to, you know, real, real auctions. So he, he didn't give a. He was just wearing. He's just dressing in heat gear every single day. Game worn.

[Hank]

Yep.

[Big Cat]

That kind of rocks.

[Hank]

I don't mind it.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, imagine if he was just using like Mario Chalmers jerseys for like, you know, bath, bath rags and stuff.

[Hank]

Everything in his house.

[Big Cat]

Everything in his drapes.

[Hank]

Yeah, he's got you Donnis Haslam doormat.

[Big Cat]

Oh. Every single thing in his house is just a heat jersey. Okay, let's do our Mount Rushmore then. We got two awesome interviews, Howie Roseman and Vaughn Miller before we get to our Mount Rushmore. Brought to you by our friends at Game Time. There's nothing like getting to a baseball game, especially last minute. Lucky for me, I always use Game Time, the official ticketing partner Barstool sports. Game Time makes getting tickets faster and easier. Price on the app actually go down the closer it gets to showtime. Max. Where are the Phillies playing this weekend?

[Memes]

The Phillies are playing the Texas Rangers in the Dallas area this weekend. How much I can look that up.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Use Game Time. Take the guest regard of buying tickets with Game time. Download the GameTime app, create an account use code PMT for $20 off. Your first purchase terms apply. Again, create an account redeem code PMT for $20 off. Download the Game Time app today. What time is it? Game Time. What were the prices you can get.

[Memes]

In the ballpark for $18 in Arlington, Texas?

[Big Cat]

Maybe get some right field seats with Game Time. Catch a Schwarber home run. So use Game Time today. Use that code PMT for $20 off. Download the Game Time app today. What time is it? Game Time. We're also brought to you by our friends at Truly Truly. Hard Seltzer is all about fun, light, refreshing variety and a bubbly effervescent style to get you and your people in a lively party mood. Truly unruly is an 8% hard seltzer. Full of flavor but still light and refreshing. Gets in four flavors. Tropical Twist, Berry Blast, Citrus Crush and Strawberry Smash. You can even grab a big 24 ounce TR twist single at a convenience store. Truly is the perfect day. Drink tailgating on the weekend, bouncing around for game day. You can't beat something as light and easy, but big on flavors is truly, truly unruly. Drinks, light, parties hard. Get unruly with truly 8% hard seltzer. Truly unruly 8% hard seltzer. You can find it anywhere, like your favorite grocery, liquor or convenience store. Or visit trulyhardselter.com and use the Truly finder to grab it near you. Okay. Kicking it back to ourselves in studio for our Mount Rushmore. Okay, Mount Rushmore time. We are doing the Mount Rushmore dream blunt rotation. Dead or alive.

[Hank]

Could be anybody.

[Big Cat]

Could be anyone. Anyone, Anyone.

[Memes]

Yep.

[Big Cat]

Could be anyone.

[Memes]

Agreed.

[Big Cat]

Now memes out. Is Shane working with you, Max?

[Memes]

No, Memes and memes is still here in spirit. We've been texting.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Memes]

He's just not here for the ask.

[Max]

Will you ask him if you want Shane to help?

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Shane, would you like to help? Dream blunt rotation. You're not ready for that.

[Memes]

Shane is just shaking his head.

[Hank]

Shane, we're going to need the undrafted free agents. You need to assemble a team.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, we are going to need a team at the end.

[Memes]

Yeah.

[Hank]

I would like to see you means.

[Max]

His reaction to you telling him Shane's doing the picks.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Hank]

Max, I have a question for you. Did memes hit you up and say Queen Latifah?

[Memes]

No, he did not.

[Big Cat]

Okay. All right.

[Memes]

There is a memes pick on here that I'm excited to talk about in the honorable mention.

[Big Cat]

Okay. All right. So it's already been paired honorable mentions.

[Memes]

Oh, yeah.

[Big Cat]

I have a Zach pick as well. That's.

[Memes]

But he memes is, like, insisting that I actually use this. Use this.

[Big Cat]

I think you gotta. Each man.

[Memes]

No, there isn't a. There is an H in there.

[Big Cat]

Oh, okay.

[Max]

Harriet Tubman.

[Big Cat]

Okay. All right, let's rip it. So it's Zach and I first, and then Max and Memes and then PFT and Hank.

[Hank]

Hank's got the ball.

[Big Cat]

Hank's got the ball for this one fully.

[Hank]

No, we collaborated, but, I mean, this is Hank's turn.

[Memes]

Yeah, this is. This is a Hank. This is a Hank draft.

[Big Cat]

What do you mean by that?

[Memes]

This is a Hank draft.

[Big Cat]

Because PFT is not a drug guy.

[Hank]

Or because Hank's a drug guy, Not a drug guy. There's neither one of.

[Memes]

Between drug guy and weed guys guy.

[Hank]

Hank and I have both. Both quit drugs.

[Big Cat]

Yep. Yep. Okay.

[Hank]

At some point.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. All right, ready? All right, so we have one, one. We're gonna go easy. One, one. Not overthink this. Stay strong. Don't break. We're gonna go Snoop Dog. One, one. All right. He's gonna. He's gonna keep it. I mean, he's gonna provide the weed. He's gonna roll the blunt.

[Hank]

Thought about Soup Dog. Not on our list.

[Max]

Snoop Dogg.

[Big Cat]

But I.

[Max]

Someone else picked it earlier in the year, and I said he was criminal, murderer, so I had to stay strong with that one.

[Hank]

I think his weed would be too strong.

[Memes]

That's what I was gonna go way too strong. But in the classic blunt rotation, Snoop Dogg is a correct pick. I'm. I'm staying true to myself.

[Big Cat]

He's.

[Memes]

He might be like my one. One of, like, wouldn't want to be in a blunt rotation because I would.

[Big Cat]

Get way too high. Yeah. All right, what's your pick?

[Memes]

I'm gonna go with vibes, A guy that, like, no matter what, if you're going to be smoking weed with this guy, you're going to be. It's going to be good vibes, and it's a guy who is the ultimate good vibes guy. We're gonna go with Adam Sandler.

[PFT Commenter]

Wow.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Hank]

Good pick. We had him on the list.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

I'm on our list as well. Wow.

[Max]

That changes thing. That was going to be our one one too.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Max]

I agree with what Max just said. I also think you want to have someone, you know, who's a good storyteller. Celebrity and good vibes. Funny, personable. We're gonna go Matthew McConaughey.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Hank]

Okay.

[Max]

On our list and similar, you know, all time storyteller, all time guest, may rest in peace. All time vibes. We're gonna go Bill Walton.

[Big Cat]

Okay. Yep.

[Hank]

Great guy to smoke with, I would imagine.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Max]

He might, you know, microphone. He might hold on to the blunt.

[Big Cat]

A little bit too long, but talk a little.

[Max]

But the story is like, you know, you get him going with the. With a group.

[Big Cat]

Sure.

[Max]

The vibes would be all time.

[Big Cat]

Absolutely.

[Hank]

And I think the moments where Bill Walton doesn' lot of sense. He makes more sense when you're high.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Max]

Oh, yeah.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Memes]

Okay. We're sticking. We're sticking with our. Our vibes team over here. We're going to go with Adam Sandler, dead or alive, paired up with good friend Chris Farley.

[Big Cat]

All right. He did die from drugs.

[Hank]

Not weed. That's okay.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, but still not weed. So we're talking.

[Memes]

We're talking about weed.

[Big Cat]

Okay. What do we do here, Zach? Everything's out there.

[Zach]

There's a lot of different routes we could take here.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Zach]

What route do you think?

[Big Cat]

I don't know.

[Zach]

Neither do I, which is not good.

[Big Cat]

We're. We're gonna be paralyzed here for a second. Talk it out, talk it out, talk it out.

[Zach]

I don't hate 6. I don't hate 11. I don't hate you.

[Big Cat]

Feel your voice is quivering a little bit there. That made me a little nervous.

[Max]

How many rappers are on Zach's list?

[Big Cat]

He had a few. He had a few. But I. We feel strong about some of our picks, clearly. Yeah. Yeah, we do. All right, Zach, do you want me to just try to take the ball here?

[Zach]

I think you take the ball and.

[Big Cat]

Just go for it. All right, our next two picks are going to be Dave Chappelle and Hunter S. Thompson.

[Hank]

Okay.

[Big Cat]

Whoa. All right. What do you think about those two?

[Hank]

Both good picks. We had Dave Chappelle on the list.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Hunter S. Thompson. Oh, boy, would that be funny, Fun.

[Hank]

He'd just be fun to, like, spend a weekend with.

[Big Cat]

Just talk to forever. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I feel good about that. Zach, Good picks. Yeah, we have too many pitch. Too many. Too many people. This was too big.

[Max]

There's a lot. Yeah, there's a lot.

[Big Cat]

Like, a lot of people scanning it, being like, do we pick? Tow mater? Do we pick. That was one of Zach's picks. I kind of liked it. He would rock.

[Memes]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Memes has one of those.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, no.

[Memes]

Yeah, but it's a good pick. It's a good.

[Max]

So pick them.

[Big Cat]

No, I'm not gonna pick them, Max.

[Memes]

No, I'm. Stay strong with ignoring memes. I'm gonna stay strong with my vibe here.

[Max]

One Memes.

[Memes]

We're gonna go with more of a. More of a weed guy, but still a good vibe guy. We're gonna go with Seth Rogen.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Politics.

[Hank]

Well, also.

[Big Cat]

So political also.

[Memes]

I don't know anything about that.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, he's gotten very political.

[Hank]

He's just, like a pro weed smoker. That's the thing. It's like.

[Big Cat]

I mean, you can't also.

[Max]

How's that not the same as Snoop Dogg?

[Big Cat]

Same thing. He's. No, but his weed's gon just as strong, if not stronger.

[Memes]

Is it?

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. All right.

[Zach]

We're getting high with Seth Rogen.

[Hank]

Yeah. You don't want to be an amateur included in a pro blunt rotation. It's gonna. It's gonna get messy.

[Memes]

Yeah, no, that's fair. That's fair. That's fair criticism.

[Big Cat]

Okay. All right, last two.

[Hank]

I'm scared where Hank's gonna go. Hank, he threw some ones out there that I was just like, be yourself, Hank.

[Big Cat]

Let's not pander. Just be yourself.

[Hank]

All right, 50.

[Big Cat]

Give it to us. Hey, hit the Jesus button. All right.

[Hank]

I trust my guy.

[Max]

I wanted to hit the Jesus really bad.

[Big Cat]

Hit it. No, we got this is the 2026 or 2025 meatballs. I know.

[Hank]

It's. It's.

[Max]

I'm happy that we have a teammate because, like, I would have. I would have taken Jesus like six more times this year. We have.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Max]

We got a lot of yappers. We got the good vibes. We want someone great laugh, good hanging, but not too much of a. You know, he's not like a Seth Rogen weed guy where he's gonna have the strongest weed in the world.

[Big Cat]

We're gonna go Gronk. Okay.

[Hank]

I like that.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Hank]

Good pick. Yeah, he just. Just be fun. He would just be a fun time.

[Big Cat]

Okay. And then this is.

[Max]

This is my pick. I feel strongly about this one.

[Big Cat]

Do it.

[Max]

All time vibes. One of my best friends. PFT commenter.

[Big Cat]

Oh, that is such a.

[Hank]

Thank you, Hank. I don't know how that one's gonna.

[Big Cat]

I don't know.

[Hank]

I don't know how that one's gonna play.

[Big Cat]

You can't do Hank.

[Hank]

My dream blum rotation wanted. I tried to talk him out of it. Max, I'm not a weed guy.

[Big Cat]

We've never done this.

[Memes]

That's an interesting play. Picked himself.

[Big Cat]

PFT.

[Memes]

Just picked himself.

[Hank]

But that's. That makes.

[Big Cat]

But this is. But people are voting on team. The fans of our show are voting on this. That's bullshit.

[Hank]

Honestly, not a bad pick.

[Big Cat]

Come on.

[Max]

That's my.

[Big Cat]

That's a dream. You guys wouldn't. Wouldn't argue against this if one of us picked.

[Hank]

No, I was.

[Big Cat]

I. I was worried that.

[Max]

I was worried that we weren't gonna. It wasn't gonna get.

[Big Cat]

I think that's a crazy.

[Max]

I was very worried that Max or you were gonna take him.

[Hank]

Hank and I have had some legal. Some good sessions before. Hank knows I'm a good time to smoke with.

[Big Cat]

That's playing like you're playing to our audience and being like the guy who everyone listens to. That's kind of. You don't think that's rigging it a little. I think you.

[Max]

I.

[Big Cat]

It was.

[Max]

We waited because I. I was worried that someone else was going to take him. I'm happy we.

[Big Cat]

He got to us. That's.

[Hank]

He was worried.

[Big Cat]

Never been done. No, no, no, no.

[Max]

It has been done.

[Big Cat]

You guys did it when you guys.

[Max]

Did it a couple years ago. I forget what you.

[Big Cat]

You need.

[Memes]

You need more.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. What are you talking.

[Memes]

If you're gonna make that claim, then I'll.

[Big Cat]

I'll listen to it.

[Max]

Oh, where's memes?

[Big Cat]

Call them. Yeah.

[Hank]

Hey, he's not wrong. I'm fun to smoke with.

[Big Cat]

With.

[Hank]

It's one of my calling cards.

[Big Cat]

I mean, but you see how there's a. A huge.

[Hank]

You can see how I was uncomfortable with the pick.

[Big Cat]

No, but not even that.

[Hank]

Hey, sorry.

[Shane]

Hold on, hold on.

[Big Cat]

Before he says something. Memes, do you.

[Max]

No, hold on, hold on. All this doesn't matter. You said if I have a.

[Big Cat]

No, no, no. I want to ask him a question.

[Max]

A couple years ago. You can.

[Big Cat]

I'm.

[Max]

This is my phone call.

[Big Cat]

All right, I'll call you back. Memes, are you.

[Max]

Do you have a second?

[Shane]

Yeah, I have a second.

[Max]

Do you recall when. When PFT and Big Cow were teammates on Mount Rushmore? They picked up themselves for something.

[Shane]

They pick themselves for something.

[Max]

Yeah. Like, as one of the choices.

[Shane]

I'm getting another call.

[Big Cat]

Memes, what's up? Hey, we're doing the dream blunt rotation, and Hank picked pft. Don't you think that's pretty crazy?

[Max]

Well, you. Let's alert a question. You shouldn't. You should let him answer the question before you.

[Big Cat]

Crazy, but also not the best pitch. Oh, keep going.

[Hank]

Why?

[Big Cat]

I. I probably would have picked Hank. Oh, you.

[Max]

Yeah, you should have.

[Big Cat]

But you don't think for the voters, like, there's that. Was that the show they're listening to is. And PFT's on there? Yeah, but. Okay, that could be a sneaky good pick. Well, that's what I'm saying. It's kind. It's. It's also. That's. That's the point is that, like, it's pandering to a level. It's not pandering.

[Max]

It's not pandering.

[Big Cat]

They're listening to this show because it's not pandering. Okay.

[Hank]

Hey, Memes. Hey, it's PFT here. But there was. Was there an instance where me and Big Cat picked ourselves? That's very important you think about that.

[Big Cat]

I, I can't remember. You got to come with better. I knew you were gonna come with this. And you. No, well, no, I, I, I didn't.

[Max]

Think you guys were gonna object as hard.

[Big Cat]

I mean, it's kind of crazy you that. Stop saying that you don't want to smoke with BFDs when you have the list of the whole world. Also memes, I've smoked with pft.

[Hank]

Max took. I would like Latifah.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, that's also not.

[Memes]

How is this a dream blunt rotation.

[Big Cat]

When you've already done this, you smoke with pft, and you could pick anyone from there.

[Hank]

We had a great time.

[Max]

One of the Best sessions I've ever had.

[Hank]

That's one of the best times ever.

[Memes]

You've spoke with PFT multiple times.

[Big Cat]

That's why we keep doing it, letting the picks in. But it's. It's the most blatant pandering of all time because you could pick anyone from the world.

[Memes]

I honestly kind of agree with. Agree with Memes, though. It's probably not, not, Not a great pick.

[Big Cat]

I don't know.

[Max]

The, the four, like, the, The. The rotation that we have would be a dream.

[Hank]

Okay. Memes, do you have that?

[Big Cat]

I don't think canceled stuff.

[Hank]

Things that have been canceled.

[Big Cat]

That would be Barcelo Vantage, which wouldn't be us show. And that's also you.

[Hank]

I love, I love how Hank's eating ice cream cone.

[Memes]

It honestly plays for this draft, though.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, true.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

All right.

[Hank]

Hey, great talk.

[Big Cat]

Bye. Okay. All right. You can have anyone dead and alive, and you pick someone you've smoked with many times.

[Max]

Again, like, I feel like you're disrespecting pft.

[Big Cat]

No, I'm not.

[Hank]

Okay. I'm a chill guy. I can do.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Max]

I mean, the, Our other option was the Rizzler, and that was.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I want to do the Rizzler.

[Hank]

I feel like the Rizzler would be a good one for the graphic.

[Big Cat]

That's a great pick.

[Hank]

Yeah, just blow it in his ear.

[Big Cat]

Probably his first time he smoked. Yeah.

[Max]

What was me? What was the Harry Tubman one?

[Big Cat]

Wait, we're not done.

[Zach]

Hank, you're giving away.

[Big Cat]

I know that you finished your ice cream.

[Hank]

Oh, my God.

[Big Cat]

You guys can take big. You guys can take. You guys can take big cat.

[Memes]

No, I'm a. I'm an integrity guy here.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Max]

Max doesn't want to smoke with you.

[Big Cat]

No, I, I. If you had the whole world, I would hope you wouldn't pick me. The whole history of the universe and everyone, every dead or alive celebrity, I would hope you wouldn't pick me.

[Max]

I guess I just. I love you guys.

[Big Cat]

I don't know. Pander.

[Hank]

I love you, too.

[PFT Commenter]

Thank you.

[Big Cat]

It's the most. All right.

[Hank]

What's going to happen is we're going to finish in last, and it's going to be absolutely devastating for me.

[Big Cat]

Fans are going to vote for you. Go ahead, Max.

[Memes]

See this? My. My last pick is really throwing me off here, because I wasn't too. I was kind of just thinking of Seth Rogen as. Talk us through it as like a funny, funny, smoking comedian guy who's in a bunch of funny movies, and he's a Funny guy. And my next pick is also a funny guy.

[Max]

Schneider.

[Memes]

No, but it might. I'm. I'm just gonna. I'm gonna stick with my pick. I'm gonna go with Shane Gillis as my last pick.

[Hank]

That's okay.

[Big Cat]

Had him on our list.

[Max]

It's a good pick.

[Big Cat]

He's a drinker, but.

[Memes]

Yeah, but that's okay.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Max]

That's a good pick.

[Big Cat]

No, it's a good pick.

[Hank]

Would you, like.

[Memes]

My problem is, are they going to be at odds if. If this is. I didn't know. I didn't know the political affiliation.

[Hank]

Would you expect Shane to show up and. And to start performing for you?

[Memes]

No.

[Big Cat]

What?

[Hank]

Like, just make some jokes. He sits down, you're like, all right, Shane, you're on. Here's your weed.

[Big Cat]

What?

[Memes]

No, I'm just. There's a lot of funny. Funny. Having funny people in a room. It's not like he's there. There's four comedians in that room.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Memes]

It's not like you're asking one person to be funny. Guys. Just.

[Hank]

Did you think about the cohesion of your group? So, yeah, you have Shane, you've got.

[Memes]

No, that's what that. That's what.

[Hank]

Who else?

[Memes]

You have Adam Sandler and Chris Farley. I think.

[Max]

I think that's a good list.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

I were thinking cohesion as well, because we wanted to. To have people that we know can all handle their weed. No one's going to be calling to go to the hospital because they got a little too high. Our last pick is going to be Marshawn Lynch.

[Hank]

It's a good pick.

[Memes]

That's a very good pick.

[Hank]

Very good pick.

[Memes]

Very good pick.

[Big Cat]

Great hang.

[Zach]

I like that.

[Big Cat]

All right. So many honorable mentions.

[Hank]

So many.

[Memes]

Can I say the memes one?

[Big Cat]

Yeah. And then I'll say the Zach one.

[Memes]

Memes was insistent on Helen Keller. Oh, I don't know why.

[Big Cat]

I don't.

[Memes]

I think we should call him and get, like, why? Ever since you first brought up this dream, blunt rotation, he. I think he wants to. He wants to get to the bottom of whether she is actually what she says that she is, but she can't.

[Big Cat]

Say what she is.

[Memes]

I know that.

[Max]

So Helen Keller's mom is.

[Big Cat]

No, no, no.

[Memes]

Because memes. You know how there's, like, the Internet meme that. That she was just lying.

[Max]

She was. Well, her mom was lying, I guess.

[Memes]

But he wants to.

[Big Cat]

He wants to get to the bottom.

[Memes]

To get to the bottom of it.

[Big Cat]

But if. Call you.

[Max]

Call me.

[Big Cat]

All right, Calm. Zach's pick That I loved didn't make.

[Memes]

Well, he's not gonna be able to hear you guys.

[Big Cat]

That's fine. Just ask him. Just talk him through. It was Yellow Eminem.

[Hank]

Okay.

[Big Cat]

He just. He said that he thinks Yellow Eminem's always high.

[Hank]

He does seem like the chillest one.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Memes]

Chicken Joe was the cartoon that. That we were talking about from Surf's Up.

[Big Cat]

Okay. Okay.

[Hank]

I'd say. I'd say Yellow Eminem and Patrick from spongebob.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Be kind of the same vibe. Good vibes on that one, Zach.

[Big Cat]

You rip off your honorable mentions because you had some good, good ones.

[Zach]

I do. I do think Crush the Turtle for Finding Nemo would be a good hang.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Zach]

I also think that Yoda would be a good hang.

[Hank]

Yoda is a great call.

[Zach]

Brian Griffin is a dog for Family Guy. He might be a good hang.

[Hank]

Smart ass.

[Zach]

What are our thoughts on going Zuckerberg?

[Hank]

It's weed isn't like mind control serum. So I think he would just like, he. He would call the cops on himself.

[Max]

Maybe Tom from MySpace.

[Hank]

Yeah, he'd be a better hang. I think that Tom from MySpace had it all figured out.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Cashed out for like 750 million. Never heard from him again. That is the dream we had. Obviously. I think the Rizzler would have been a great pick.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Hank thought it was childhood.

[Big Cat]

I actually was shocked this pick wasn't taken. Neil DeGrasse Tyson.

[Hank]

Yeah. He just sometimes can get like too much.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Max]

We also know what the.

[Memes]

We thought about that with Rogan and thought that same thing.

[Big Cat]

We also had Albert Einstein on there for that reason. Reason.

[Max]

Trump.

[Big Cat]

Okay. Trump. Funny, funny.

[Max]

Remove. Remove politics from it. But yeah, in. In this theory, everyone.

[Big Cat]

He could be called. He could be.

[Max]

Oh, yeah.

[Big Cat]

The police or the ambulance.

[Max]

Jesus.

[Big Cat]

Too high.

[Max]

Leo DiCaprio.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

We had David Attenborough.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Hank]

Just calmly tell you animal facts.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Keanu Reeves. Yeah. Nick Cage.

[Max]

Liz Khalifa.

[Big Cat]

Yup.

[Max]

Michael Jackson.

[Big Cat]

Yep.

[Hank]

Harambe.

[Max]

Xavier Leggett.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Max]

Would be a great one. I don't.

[Big Cat]

Harambe would be good.

[Hank]

We had.

[Max]

I almost.

[Hank]

If you.

[Max]

If you made a switch, I might have gone her on that.

[Big Cat]

Just pander even more.

[Hank]

We had Putin, Vladimir Putin and Vladimir Zielinski together.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Hank]

Solve the crisis, get it figured out. Say one thing you like about the other guy.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Max]

We had Prince Billy Strings, Ozzy Osborne.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Zach]

Steve Irwin.

[Big Cat]

What do you guys think about Johnny?

[Max]

Oh, Steve Irving. We had Johnny John.

[Big Cat]

Would he make you do some crazy?

[Hank]

No, I think he'd just have great chill.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Max]

Miles Teller.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Chill as Charles Barkley.

[Memes]

We had Mac Miller, but he got a little sad at the end of his life, so I. I didn't want to.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, that one would. I was.

[Max]

Well, I mean, you took Chris Farley.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah.

[Memes]

But Chris Farley is, you know, basically.

[Max]

The same exact thing.

[Big Cat]

Willie Nelson. Yeah.

[Hank]

Willie B. That's a big miss.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Zach]

Joe Button could be a good hang.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Max]

No, no, there's so much talking. He, like, he's a yeller. Joe Button is a. Is a Bill Walton. Kind of the same way. Like, they're, you know, they call it the microphone in the rotation where they just take the blunt and don't. Don't stop talking. Don't give it up. Joe Button, I feel like, would just.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Ramis.

[Zach]

I'm there to listen.

[Big Cat]

James, we good? Norm MacDonald.

[Memes]

Norm MacDonald was on our list. Yeah. I thought about just going that entire crew, like comedians of, like, that. That prime group.

[Max]

Who would your fourth have been? Spade.

[Memes]

Maybe Chris. Probably Chris Rock.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Max]

That would have been a strong list. I think you guys are gonna win.

[Big Cat]

Mellow.

[Memes]

The Seth Rogen thing, I'm nervous about.

[Big Cat]

He is very.

[Memes]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

That.

[Memes]

That I didn't know about.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Memes]

I. But because I wanted, like, I feel like it's good to have one smoker, like one guy who was a smoker in the group to kind of.

[Hank]

He rolls a blunt.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah.

[Hank]

Plato play.

[Big Cat]

D'oh. Tim Lincecum.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

He's. Oh, big time smoker. And I feel like he doesn't open up at all. And it would be awesome to hear some stories.

[Hank]

John Daly.

[Shane]

Oh, yeah.

[Memes]

Shane, we need your. We need your honorable mention. Your.

[Big Cat]

Your.

[Memes]

Your free agent draft.

[Big Cat]

So Zach had Shaggy from Scooby Doo.

[Hank]

Oh, yeah, that'd be a good pick.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Scooby from Scooby Doo. Rihanna. Yeah.

[Memes]

We had Miley Cyrus. That would have been a good one.

[Big Cat]

We had Martha Stewart as well. Rihanna's a good pick dog Would have been good together.

[Hank]

John Madden.

[Big Cat]

John Madden. No, I feel like he would. He would call the cops.

[Hank]

No, he would just sort of. He would giggle, make sound effects.

[Zach]

That's why I thought about Batman. Maybe a cop.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, Batman might. Maybe a cop. Maybe arrest us right when we light up. What do you got, Shane? Make your four. I had Crush was my one one, but most of them got listed.

[Zach]

Crush, Keanu, Ricky Williams.

[Big Cat]

Oh, good one. I don't.

[Memes]

Nicholas cage.

[Zach]

Kelso from that 70s show.

[Big Cat]

Okay, okay, okay.

[Memes]

Just the character.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right? Smart.

[Memes]

Yeah, yeah.

[Big Cat]

You don't want to get.

[Memes]

You don't want to get it.

[Big Cat]

Yep.

[Hank]

Okay.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Allen Iverson.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

That'd be fun.

[Hank]

Be fun.

[Big Cat]

Nate Diaz. Nate Diaz would be fun.

[Hank]

I feel like with Nate, you'd end up hitting each other.

[Big Cat]

Gregor would be. If we did a dream coke rotation, that would be a good Zuckerberg spot. Just get all his best ideas. Take him away. Nick Cage.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Would be sick. Sitting in his.

[Max]

Like Vince Vaughn. Owen Wilson.

[Big Cat]

Oh, yeah. Vince Vaughn would be fun, I think.

[Hank]

Did we say Bortles?

[Big Cat]

We didn't. We all said would be fun, too. Yeah. Kevin James.

[Zach]

How about Kevin James a pig?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Well, I said because you told me it.

[Zach]

Great pick.

[Hank]

I actually think Jesus would have been good pick here, Hank.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, it could have played. Yeah.

[Hank]

Just be a chill guy to smoke with.

[Max]

We got podcast Jesus basically respect Hank.

[Big Cat]

You know? Exactly.

[Hank]

I don't think. I think it's. I understand where Hank's head is coming from. I just don't know if it's gonna play.

[Max]

It's not. I don't think it is.

[Memes]

It might not. No.

[Big Cat]

I don't think.

[Max]

I don't think we won this draft or anywhere close.

[Big Cat]

I think it's our fans.

[Memes]

We'll see.

[Big Cat]

All right, good. Mount Rushmore. Great.

[Hank]

Mount Rushmore. Mount Kushmore. Before we get to Howie Roseman is brought to you by our great friends at Aura Frames. I got a simple but meaningful gift idea for your mom, your dad, your grandparent who lives across the country. It's a digital picture frame from Aura. Aura Frames was named the best digital photo frame by Wirecutter, and it's easy to see why. There's unlimited storage. You can add as many photos and videos as you can find. It's so simple to set up. You just plug it in, you share away. You can download an app so you can actually upload your pictures from your place. Put them on mom's picture frame in her living room. I got my mom an aura frame for Christmas last year. She absolutely loves it. I upload pictures of Blake all the time. It's in her living room. One of her favorite gifts she's ever gotten. She absolutely loves it. And actually, there's a picture of me, Jerry o' Connell, and my El Camino in her living room. She wanted that one on there. So that pops up in the slideshow on mom's Aura frame. It's a great, great, great gift. Check it out. Start reliving your favorite memories by visiting auraframes.com for a limited time. Listeners can get 35 bucks off on their best selling Carver Mat frame. That's a U R A frames.com promo code PMT. Support the show by mentioning us at checkout. Terms and conditions apply. Get an aura frame today. Howie Roseman is also brought to you by proper 12. It's PFT here I'm making my Irish entrance with proper number 12 Irish whiskey. How do you make an Irish entrance, you ask? It starts with a shot of proper number 12 Irish whiskey. Because real friends don't let friends Irish exit a party without a story to tell. Original proper number 12 is a rich and smooth blend of golden grain and single malt aged four years in bourbon barrels mixed up with some ginger ale for a classic and refreshing proper ginger. If you're in the mood for something smooth but a little sweeter, try proper Irish apple. It's a delicious blend of proper's award winning Irish whiskey with crisp fresh notes of apple. So get out there, make your Irish entrance. Anything else just wouldn't be proper. Make your Irish entrance today with proper number 12 Irish whiskey. And now, here's Howie Roseman.

[Big Cat]

Okay. We now welcome on a very, very, very special guest. He's the architect of two super bowl championships. It is our grit week interviews presented by. Hey, dude, it is general manager, executive vice president. Is that your official title?

[Shane]

You can call me whatever.

[Big Cat]

Okay. It is Howie Roseman. Howie, thank you for joining us. We start every interview, grit week with the same question. I'm actually going to change it a little bit. How do you define grit in players you're looking at and maybe how it shows up when you're, when you're scouting guys?

[Shane]

Adversity, you know, you want to see how people are handling adversity, overcoming adversity. And that could be in different areas of life. You know, that could be off the field, that could be on the field. But we know how hard it is to play in the NFL. We know how hard it is to play in Philly. And so we, we understand that there are going to be moments during the course of the season, you know, moments during training camp where guys are going to face adversity and what are they doing to respond to that. So we are looking for guys who have had adverse situations, overcome them, and you can go through our roster. You know, it's funny because I was thinking about what I was going to say at the super bowl parade, you know, and you know, Bob Langer, great PR guy, says to me, hey, you know, you got to speak for a couple minutes. And I'm like, what am I saying? Like the night before at like 11:30, I figured out I'm like, every single one of our players, our coaches, our staff, I think myself, you know, have overcome something in their life to get here. You know, you just can go through the team. You know, Lane Johnson was a juco quarterback, you know, best right tackle to ever play the game. Obviously, Jalen hurts A.J. brown. His team didn't want him. I mean, Devontae Smith, third receiver. I mean, I could go through every player on our team, you know, and then I got hit in the head with a beer can, and everything changed. But, you know, I think that that's really how I would define grit.

[Hank]

I would say Jalen is a great example of that. Like, the fact what he went through in college and how he respond to that. He just seems like the right type of person that you would want in your building. Is that, like, when you were breaking him down before the draft, was that a major factor in how you evaluated him?

[Shane]

And he kept getting better, you know, and there was constant improvement. Like, this guy was working on his craft. Every part of the process you saw from when he was a freshman, and people forget, like, he was the SEC offensive freshman of the year, you know, like, this wasn't. Like this guy hadn't had success, but everything that didn't work for him, he worked on to improve, you know, and he continued that even, like, when you saw him at the Senior bowl to the combine. And it was the same for him when he was here, you know, from the time that he came in during training camp, because that was the COVID year, you know, he didn't. We didn't have an offseason with him. And then you saw him play towards the end of the year, he kept getting better and better. And so when you have guys who you got to be talented, you know, at the end of the day, like, it's hard to play in the NFL, like. And so. So at the end of the day, all of these things are really important, but you got to have physical ability, too. So he had those. And you looked at him and you saw kind of what was winning in the NFL and how successful he was, even winning in college. And quite honestly, we didn't think he'd be there. When we picked in the second round, it was kind of like, yeah, we like this guy. Probably not taking him in the first round, but, yeah, this guy is still sitting there in the second round. That would be a gift. So. So I think that's kind of how we felt about.

[Hank]

We were joking with Trevor Lawrence when we had him on the show. A couple weeks ago that he didn't lose enough growing up to like be able to respond to adversity, which we were like, we're busting his balls about and we were taking that seriously. But is there anything that you would ever look at a player, be like, I don't know how he's going to respond because he's just been on great teams his entire career?

[Shane]

Yeah, I think that when you're looking, sometimes if you're looking at a charmed life and not a lot of people have a charmed life, you know, especially as, as you get older. And these guys that we're getting, you know, they're still 21, 22, 23, something in their life has happened to them that they've had to respond to. Most of those guys, but I think you got to dig into that too, you know, and some, some, guys, you know, are fortunate to have great upbringings and just, you know, the football gods have preyed upon them freaking great physiques and great careers and you don't want to penalize that them for that either, you know, but it's very few and far between between that you find guys like that.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, you mentioned adversity. Your story is awesome. And I always never know what to believe when I'm reading up on someone on the Internet. So you were a football fanatic from very young age playing fantasy football. What was it, what was the first year you played fantasy football?

[Shane]

Yeah, before it became big. But I would say like, you know, I, I remember I grew up, you know, my first experience football, I was 6 years old and the jets and Dolphins played in the AFC championship game and AJ Dewey had two interceptions on Richard Todd. And I was like crushed, you know, and, and I don't think I missed a football Sunday from that time on. And you know, when I was growing up, I want to play quarterback, you know, in the NFL. And I realized really quickly that wasn't going to happen. But I loved everything about the game. I loved studying it, watching it. And this is the only thing I ever wanted to do in my life. And it was like, you know, to everyone who was around me, it was so far fetched because I didn't have any connection or anything. And, and I think I was just fortunate that at least I knew from an early age what I want to do. So at least, you know, my psychopathic tendencies came out early so I could kind of, you know, stalk people at an early age and try to get into the NFL. But obviously just fortunate to get an opportunity.

[Big Cat]

So the story goes that I read that you sat next to John Elway's father on a plane.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

And he kind of gave you the time of day where he was like, you know, you're 10 years old, but he's actually listening to you and being like, this kid knows football. And that almost like it changed my life.

[Shane]

It changed my life because, you know, I was going to visit my grandparents in Florida, and sitting in the back of a plane, and I was reading like a draft preview, and I was wearing a Yankees hat, and he just kind of tipped my cab, and he said, oh, my son played for the Yankees. And I'm like, who's your son? And he's like, john Elway. And he just sat and talked to me, you know, at the end of the plane, he handed my mom business card and said, you know, have him keep in touch with me. I've never met a kid that young who's this passionate, knew so much. And of course, she threw away the business card. But I finally had someone who believed in me, you know, and I held on to that for a long time. And the first time I met John Elway, I told him how important his dad was to me after one meeting. And that's incredible. Everyone needs someone to believe in that.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, that's incredible. Just a crazy circumstance. So. All right, so. So that happens when you're 10. And then I was reading more about how when you're trying to get in the NFL, you're writing letters to every team, trying to get your foot in the door, which is hard to do. Was it every single team?

[Shane]

It was every single team.

[Big Cat]

And what was the letter?

[Shane]

It was just like, I'll do anything, you know, I want to work in football, I want to work in scouting. You know, Give me an opportunity, you know, I'm not asking for money, and I just would collect rejection letters, you know, which was great because it was awesome because it really allowed me to. To not care in my socials life, you know, so if, like, I saw. I'm like, every freaking NFL team's rejecting me. How hard is it to go ask a girl out, you know, my wife, you know, so it was a great lesson to me, you know, about. People are. Are paralyzed by the word no, you know, and you gotta. You gotta get past it in life, you know, A lot of people are gonna say, you can or no. And so it was a great lesson for me, but it took a long time.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

I heard that you would also send thank you letters for the rejection letters.

[Shane]

Yeah, that's how I got really my first crazy.

[Big Cat]

That's a cuck move.

[Hank]

Yeah, that's crazy. Like, thank. Thank you for your nose. But then that stands out in your head, though.

[Big Cat]

You're probably thinking, well, if they see the thank you, then they might say yes.

[Shane]

Yeah, that's no doubt. You know, there was an ulterior motive. I'm sitting there and I'm going, maybe they think I'm really nice. You know, what I didn't realize was they thought I was a psychopath. They really did. And. But that got me my first call from Mike Tannenbaum, who's the pro director with the Jets. And he basically called me. I had this, like, at the end of time, there was caller id, you know, and I saw, like, New York jets football club. And when I grew up, I was a diehard jets fan, you know, and. And so I see this, and I'm like, you know, which one of my boys is pranking me? Like, this isn't funny. And I'm like, hello? And it's like, hey, it's the New York Jets. And I'm like, yeah, that's funny, you know, because at this time, I was already rejected so much. And Mike got on the phone, and he basically is like, you know, I got 15 minutes for you. You know, I. I'm calling you because I was looking through my resumes at the time. That's how you did them. And after every one of my resumes is like a thank you letter for me, basically saying, we have nothing. So, like, what's your deal? You know, what's your story? So. And then interview with the jets, with him and Coach Parcells. My first interview for a personnel job, and I didn't get the job. And I was talking here, they were giving me this, like, keep a surprise of your. Of your plans, you know, which is basically probably their letter they gave to everyone. And I made a connection with. With Joe Banner's assistant. I said, call the Jets. And Joe Banner called Mike. And he goes, is he really psychopath? Like. And he's like, maybe you just interview him. You know, I might be, but. And Joe interviewed me, found out I am, in fact, a psychopath, but for some reason hired me. And that's how.

[Big Cat]

Awesome. And then. And then in your growth, you know, getting your foot in the door, you came on as kind of a salary cap guy. When did you, like, shed the salary? I'm not just a salary cap guy, because I'm sure there was. That was probably difficult to do.

[Shane]

Yeah, it was a different time. You know, and so we were. We started at the Vet, and Coach Reed had just started, and it was a really small organization. And within a year, we made a change to gm and we brought in, you know, a huge mentor to me and may rest in peace, Tom Heckert. And Tom was a young guy. We brought him in. I was a year in, and I was the only holdover in the front office. And so for him, he didn't know any different. So, like, he'd be like, what do you do? I'm like, I do pro scouting, college scouting, cap. And he's like, all right, cool. You know, maybe a little bit of a fib, you know, but. And. And then he started bringing in people like Ryan Grigson and Matt Russell and Jason Light and John Spytek and, you know, these GMs now and around the league and just the staff. And we were all, like, in our 20s. And, you know, we go to training camp in Lehigh, and we'd hang out and we'd drink because there's nothing else to do till our staff meeting and just top ball. And. And these are still some of my best friends in the world, you know, And. And so, you know, I. I had this, like. I guess it's. It's how other people go through work, you know, and I guess, you know, you go to Google or Amazon, and I. I was surrounded by these unbelievable people and Coach Reed and think about how many guys on that staff became head coaches, you know, and Jeffrey and Joe. And it was just, you know, we're all. We're all product of who we're surrounded by. And I was surrounded by such great people who gave me the insight, and if I showed I could do something, well, like, Coach Reed used to say, listen, if you know, the cap and you got that going on, I'll give you more, you know, and then if you start finding players, I'll give you more. And that's what he did. You know, I started doing pro scouting, and then I found a little niche there. And then he's like, you gotta go on the road. You know, I was like, I gotta go on the road. I got it all in front of me. You know, I gotta go on the road. He says, you gotta go on the road. And for two years, I was out on the road and doing 30 schools, and. And it was. It was so smart by him because it was like, you need to feel what your scouts are feeling. You know, you need to feel the frustrations of missing flights and, you know, going to schools that give you a Lot of information that give you little information. And you know, I'm very fortunate that I was around people who gave me the opportunities that they did to be well rounded, you know, and then, you know, I, I got this GM job so young, but I was still surrounded by these great people. Obviously Coach Reed and, and Jeffrey and Joe is our team president and, and you think you know everything, then you get your ass kicked.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah.

[Hank]

Understanding the cap is something that it's completely eluded us. I think we have a general understanding of what a salary cap is, but like the finer points of it and how you, you know, you can kick the can down the road, but then that can turn into cap hell. Like how, how did you learn the ins and outs of the salary cap?

[Shane]

Yeah, I, I think really when I got here, there was no one better in the lead than Joe Banner. Like, he was unbelievable. And he. Signing guys before everyone else was doing it. He understood it and, and it was really like the early stages of the cap. And so I got like a graduate degree in that and understanding it and, and from my perspective, it's always about the players. You know, we, we could do as many creative deals as we want, we could have as much cap room as we want, but we're not going to be any good if we don't have any good players, you know, and so we got to get as many good players as we possibly can. And you know, for me it's not about, you know, winning some award for being under the cap or cap management. It's about having really good players and winning a lot of games. And so everything we're doing is in an effort to fit as many good players as we possibly can on every year's team.

[Hank]

As long as I'm here, how creative have you gotten with the cap?

[Shane]

Well, you know what, at this point I got really good people on a day to day basis. And basically I'm saying like, like, let's figure out ways to get creative. You know, let's, let's, let's sit down, let's figure out ideas, let's figure out ways, let's keep as many good players we possibly can. And also understanding that with that we're going to have to lose players over a period of time. Like if you look at us since 2022, we were in the Super bowl in 2022. Watch this.00 of the defensive starters are still on our roster. That's insane to me. And it's not like they're not playing in the league. You know, we have zero starters from that 20, 22 defense on our team, and we're three years later. So, you know, there has to be a process where you're still kind of moving on and going forward, and that's the hard part of this. The guys that have done so much for this team, guys that you draft, that you care about as people, and you have to basically say, hey, we got to move on. And it's like, why me? Yeah, like, why me? You're keeping all those guys, you know, So I think that's the worst part of the job.

[Big Cat]

Was there a rule, a cap rule maybe, like, 10, 15 years ago that you were able to figure out before everyone else, and then they maybe closed that loophole? Because I always love that when. When front officers are thinking so far ahead that they end up having to change it because you were. You figured out before everyone else.

[Shane]

Yeah, I probably have to think about that a little bit, you know, and again, I think the most important thing for us is, like, we have to bring talented players in. Like, none of this matters if we don't draft well. You know, if we don't re. Sign the right players, you know, none of that matters. So, like, from my perspective, the cap is a huge tool, but again, it comes down to people, you know, and bringing in the right people into your building, the right players into your building. And when you get a chance to draft guys, sign them, and see those guys, you know, come in at 22, 23, single, you know, and then retire with one team, you know, they got kids, they got a family. They're like, hey, I'm staying in Philly for the rest of my life. I mean, it gives me chills. Talking about, like, that's special.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Are you a Georgia Merchant?

[Shane]

Are you allowed to say, yeah, yeah.

[Hank]

You can say whatever.

[Big Cat]

Are you a Georgia Merchant?

[Shane]

What does that mean?

[Big Cat]

You just. You just take players from Georgia. It's, like, not that hard, Howie.

[Shane]

Well, you know, that team's good.

[Big Cat]

I'm just gonna take all their players.

[Shane]

I went to University of Florida.

[Big Cat]

Okay. Wow.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Can't beat them, join them.

[Shane]

I know. So I. You know, I think from my perspective, it's like, when you look at that Georgia defense that won the national championship, I was an unbelievably talented team, you know, and to say, like, we go into the drafts and say, hey, let's go pick three guys from Georgia, who knows what everyone else is going to do? You know, it's worked out that way, but it's really helped our team because when you have Young players on defense. Chemistry is important, communication is important, and these guys have played a lot of high level ball together. And so you have this young group of guys who have already that history together. So some of the learning curve, some of the learning curve is gone because of that. And it's kind of special to see, you know, it's kind of special to watch, you know, when the Kobe's playing linebacker and he knows what Jordan Davis and Jalen Carter is going to do and Nolan's going to do and then he can look back and he sees key like in it. It's, it's like they've, which they have, they played together for a long time. You get the same benefit that you get from a defense that has been together for three, four, five years. So it's pretty cool.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

And also just the concept of drafting good college football players is a smart, that's a smart concept for you to bring into the NFL. It's like, yeah, these guys were national champions, I think, I think they're probably pretty good.

[Shane]

Is he taking a shot at my.

[Hank]

No, no, I'm kidding.

[Big Cat]

It's very funny for people to overthink it and be like, wow, he just takes Georgia players. But I mean, they're pretty good at football.

[Shane]

Yeah. And, and I think like as a young G. And, and you know what, Like, I'm sure, I mean, you guys are great, but experience does matter a little bit. You know, you don't think that when you don't have experience like that I don't need experience. And then you get it and it goes back to this grip part, like you got to make mistakes. And I make a lot of mistakes. So for me, if I don't learn from the things I'm doing and correct them, then I'm not that smart. So you got to go back and look, where have I made mistakes? And I can tell you where I've made mistakes, why I've made mistakes, and if I do them again, well, then that's a problem.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Do you think that, that other GMs are afraid to pick up your call sometimes?

[Shane]

I, I would say in all honesty that my favorite trades are good, good, you know, and I really, I, I really don't. I hate that, you know, because I'm really looking to, to get fair value, you know, I hope not, you know, because everything that I'm doing, I'm, I. It's a small fraternity. I mean, there's not even 32 of us because some, some GMs are owners, you know, or other People or head coaches. So you look at it and it's like you don't want anyone to, to get shit for a bad deal. I've gotten shit for a bad deal. It doesn't feel good. So if you can find win win situations, you know, if I have a need and you have a need and I can help fill it, it and it works. Especially if you're in the AFC and we don't got to play you to the Super Bowl. That's a beautiful thing, you know, and I think that's the key. Let's, let's try to find something that works.

[Big Cat]

Are you addicted to accumulating draft picks? You have 13 coming up.

[Shane]

13, 13.

[Big Cat]

Do you kind of go to bed at night and be like, like maybe like a little note under your pillow being like, I got 13 draft picks coming up. Because I would. That's fun to have.

[Shane]

You know.

[Big Cat]

That's a good number.

[Shane]

It's a good number. It's a good number. The chances, chances that it stays that way before the draft next year, probably.

[Big Cat]

You'Re gonna get more, you're saying or.

[Shane]

Or trade it out, you know, like whatever it takes. It's like it's, it gives you an option to improve the team this year, gives you option to improve the team next year, maybe even the year after. I think the way it worked, the only upside to losing good players is the, for the compact form.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Shane]

You know, so we're able to get that, but lost a lot of good players for that. But you know what's really fun during training camp. Camp is when you get to watch college players now and you're like, I know the drafts in May, but this is a great time. Especially a day like today where we have a walkthrough and you can watch college guys and go, man, I get to see that guy. And maybe we got a chance at this guy, you know, because of the amount of picks that we have.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Do you still ever get out on the road to see anybody in person?

[Shane]

I haven't the last couple of years, but my oldest son is going to college in the fall and it's going to. Going to give me an excuse to kind of go out. The last time I went out, I didn't go out all last year. The year before in 2023, I went out to a couple schools sec. But I'll make it to the ACC this year. You know, we got, we got a, a hall of fame coach in the ACC now my son's going to school into the acc. So I'LL get a little ACC action.

[Hank]

Can you. Can you still, like, to this day, is it so much different seeing somebody in person than it is watching all the film that you can get your hands on?

[Shane]

I think that at certain positions, you got to see live, you know, and you could see live at Senior bowl, you could see live at the combine. When you're talking about a quarterback, like, you want to see that guy throw. You want to see how the ball comes off the fan. You want to feel the velocity, you want to feel the arm talent, you want to feel the presence, you know, of that guy. I think that the information that we get. You can do so much work at your desk. You know, we used to go to camp in Lehigh, you know, and we didn't have all our systems set up, but it's fun. There's nothing better than going to a college campus and walking around and getting the energy that you get from it and going to practice. But, you know, a great GM told me, told me a long time ago, he said, you know, he said, it's hard, you know, you never see the captain of the ship go ashore, you know. And so he said for his perspective, it was hard to get out during the course of the year. And that always stuck with me. You know, her then 2015, Ernie Corsi, what a great GM. And he said that. And. And for me, it was like every time that I. That I would go out as a GM and I used to go out more in my first phase of it, the phone would ring and they go, hey, what about this? What about this? What about this? And so you spend half your time.

[Big Cat]

On the phone, yeah, yeah. What's your best draft pick?

[Shane]

They're like fingers on your hand, man. You know, Give me your top three. Well, I'll tell you, from, from my perspective, like, I.

[Big Cat]

What.

[Shane]

What was really cool is, you know, I. My first draft was 2010. That was BG. My second draft was 2011, that was Jason Kelsey. My third draft was 2012, Fletch. My fourth draft was 2013. Late. And then I got my ass kicked, right? I got my ass kicked. I was out for a year. And those guys always stood by me. Yeah, they always believed, they always trusted me. They had always had my back. You know, it would have been very easy for them, when times were down, to just kind of. To not do that. So those four guys have been with me so long, and so to not have those guys here, you know, losing some of those guys. Thank gosh, we. We still have Lane, but those four Guys, they. We had just been through so much together, you know, literally life and death, births and families and championships. And so those guys are special, but that doesn't mean they're more special to me than, you know, all the All Pro players we got on this team right now that I care about. It's just a cool, special story to have those four guys, you know, before really, we had the success. We had made the playoffs together and done stuff, but. But to see those guys win a world championship in 17 together.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. When you say you were out for a year, did they actually move you all the way across the building?

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

That kind of sucks.

[Shane]

Yeah. Yeah. It was humbling, for sure. And for me, it was probably the best thing that happened to me because I was so fortunate early in my career to keep moving and keep moving forward and be a young GM and to take a step back and to understand some of the things I did and some of the things I could do better. Certainly never thought I'd come back here and be the gm, but I got a chance to visit with so many great people, like, unbelievable people, mostly in the sports world, but also in the business world. And I think it really shaped me to kind of help come back and, you know, be fortunate to have some of the success we've had here.

[Hank]

What was your job title for that one year?

[Shane]

Didn't matter.

[Hank]

They just picked one.

[Shane]

It didn't matter. It was really, like, you know, I felt like my most important thing was I had to support the people that counted on me, you know, And a lot of us have been together, you know, our security. I mean, everyone knows Big Dom, you know, our equipment guys, our video guys, our training staff. Like, we have been together so long, and so, like, for me, it was like, don't worry about me. If there's anything I could do to help you, just let me know, you know, what can I do to support you? And I just felt like I needed to do that the right way. Like, it was so important that I did it the right way and was positive and brought energy, no matter how shitty I felt, you know, so it was a great learning experience. And I think, again, like, I don't know that I would trade it for anything, even though, you know, it did.

[Big Cat]

Suck and you won a Super bowl two years later.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Do you.

[Big Cat]

Are you worried that, like, if you have a couple down years, that Jeffrey is like, we're gonna move Howie across the building just out of, like, good luck and then we'll win a Super bowl two years later?

[Shane]

Yeah, you know.

[Big Cat]

I would do that if I were the owner.

[Shane]

Oh, would you?

[Big Cat]

Yeah. I'd be like, wait, what worked last?

[Hank]

Something about that.

[Shane]

I think I'm over that. I think I'm over that. I think I'm gonna keep walking. Yeah. Yeah.

[Hank]

Okay.

[Big Cat]

Did you.

[Hank]

Did you think about leaving when that happened? I. I think most people would.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Yeah. I. I don't know that. You know, I think the thing for me was Philly's hard, so I knew, you know, how it came down kind of hard. It wasn't like I had job offers, like, being thrown at me during the time, you know, because of how much shit I was taking. So. So I just felt like I had to deal with it. I had to deal with it. I had to deal with again, like, to me, I dealt with adversity before, but to me, that was a huge lesson for my kids. You know, the people around me, like, I'm gonna take this like a man. I'll be stand up guy. I'm going to do whatever I can to help people who've helped me be in the position I am. And, you know, we'll see where we are in a year. You know, I didn't think that I would be in that role, you know, for a long time, but. But again, I think it was really good for me, and it really reminded me of my values in football, what I was looking for. And a lot of the things that I did as a GM for that those first four years weren't really consistent with how I had visions of really doing it, so. Except drafting bg, Kelsey Lane and Fudge.

[Hank]

Do you think that that part of the. That you take is because it's so fun to say, Howie.

[Shane]

Is it fun?

[Big Cat]

It sound.

[Hank]

Yes, it is. Very.

[Big Cat]

Accent.

[Shane]

Let's hear it. Let's hear it. Say it.

[Big Cat]

You can.

[Hank]

Just did right there. That was the happy. That was the.

[Memes]

How you told me to say, Howie.

[Hank]

That sounds the way that you.

[Big Cat]

Here, I'll do it.

[Hank]

Ready?

[Big Cat]

Jalen Rager.

[Memes]

Howie?

[Big Cat]

Yeah. There you go. Do you ever. Do you ever. Like, like, just in, like, you know, dangering Justin Jefferson would have been s.

[Shane]

I think that everything. All my mistakes, everything that we've done has led us to a certain point. And. And you know what's the hardest thing is like, I can tell you every pick of the picks in the sixth and seventh round free agent sign. Is I up? Like, I. My mind is so up that that's what I think about all the time.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Shane]

I think about the mistakes and I'm like, man, what was I thinking? What was I doing? And at the end of the day, it goes back to your point. You know, sometimes you draft for need, sometimes you draft for role, you know, and you're going, man, you know, we really need this role. We really need this position and this player. And that's all the times you mess up. It's just too hard to find good players. And when you start saying, like, I got to find this role, I got to find this position. And so now what I say is, like, a team's going to win the super bowl this year. Hopefully it's us or our team. Last year we weren't perfect. You know, you could go before the Super Bowl, I'm sure you guys were saying, hey, I'm worried about this on the Eagles. You know, the Chiefs win two before. I'm sure you're looking at their team and going, hey, this is their weakness. Every team's going to have a weakness. And if you think you're coming out of draft and get every need fixed, you probably had a shitty draft.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Shane]

You know, and so it's like you just got to take good players. It's so hard to find good players. You accumulate good players hopefully at important positions and everything else works out. And so I think, like, when I think about my mistakes, it's like going into an off season and saying, we need this, you know, well, you can't make something up, you can't invent something, you know, and so I think that that is probably my biggest lesson in the free agent draft process. Like, if you, if you go into it saying I need something and then you change your grades, you change kind of your criteria for the position, you're probably going to it up.

[Big Cat]

Is it intention? Because I've noticed this with your drafts and I'm wondering if it's, it's intentional. But you, you have at times been like, we're stacking kind of the same position where it's now something that maybe was a weakness is a super strength because we have depth there as well. Is that an intentional thing?

[Shane]

Like, hey, no doubt.

[Big Cat]

We're not just going to be like, oh, we took a cornerback, so we can't take another cornerback.

[Shane]

Yeah. Especially if we're talking like the third day of the draft, you know, we'll double down on stuff. The understanding that it's hard to hit on third day picks, you know, so we'll, we'll double down on guys with unique skill sets who may need development, you know, and I think from our perspective, the Biggest problem you get into is if you don't take shots on those. You know, I'll say to our staff, hey, we have a year or two before this becomes a big problem, so we better take. If we don't get one early, we better take chance on guys who have traits, who have football character, who we think we can develop. Because, you know, this is still a developmental league. And at the end of the day, when you look at it, there's no other profession. I love when I said I've never worked in any other industry, but there's no other profession where you go into and you expect the person in their first year to be elite. And we do have those expectations. We expect the rookies to perform like veteran players and perform a lead. And if they're not, they're shitty, you know, And I think from our perspective, if guys have tools in their body, they have the mindset they want to be developed. With our coaching staff, with our performance people, with our developmental people, what can we get out of them? And you get a little cocky when you get a Jordan Mulatta. You know, you get a little cocky, you start going, man, you know, we get traits and want to and, you know, maybe something like that happens. Probably never happen again.

[Hank]

Are you only a cycle like this about football or are there other sports that you thought you might want to work in?

[Shane]

Nothing else, Nothing else. Always football. I mean, I like to play in other sports, but to me, I. The team building aspect this sport, it was always that someone said that to me the year I was out, hey, would you want to get involved in baseball or basketball? I love football. The every aspect of it. I love, I love the competitiveness. I love the talent level of our players. I love the skill level of the coaches in this and the competitiveness, you know, and I really feel like it's the greatest game with the greatest people and I feel very fortunate to be part of it.

[Hank]

You're pretty good at it. I'm curious to know, like, if you're making a phone call and let's say there's a player on another team that you're interested inquiring about, do you call and do you say, do you have an offer for them ready? Or you do ask them, what would it take to get this guy?

[Shane]

Yeah, I will first. You know, I don't like. I feel like a lot. I used to waste a lot of time, watch a guy and then call. So most of the time I'll say, this is what I'm looking for. Would you be Open. I haven't even watched the guy. And then I'll call back, and then I'll try to be direct on. On kind of compensation and where we're at on it, because I like when people are direct with me. So if guy's not going to be available, I don't want to waste the three hours to watch him do work on him, do cohab on him, and do all that. I'd rather see when something's real and then work the out of it and try to bring it to a head.

[Big Cat]

That's smart.

[Hank]

If. If Adam Peters called you up and said, I'm interested in Big Time, probably the wrong.

[Shane]

Probably the wrong is out. Big Dom.

[Hank]

I'm interested. Big Dom. What would it take to get Big Dom?

[Shane]

Well, it's funny because. It's funny you said that because we did a coaching search, and I take Big Dom with me. I take Big Dom with me wherever I can, you know, I wouldn't change you. Yeah, it's fun. We like food. I thought you're gonna ask me if I was passionate about anything else, like football, and I was gonna say food. I think I. I have a tapeworm. Undiagnosed tapeworm.

[Big Cat]

But. But.

[Shane]

And we took him with head coaching interviews. I won't name the team, but after we hired Nick, other coaches got hired from that coaching cycle that we interviewed. And one of the gm, One of the coaches I saw at the combine is like, man, I love Dom, you know, and. And the GM comes with me. So I'm gonna take.

[Big Cat]

Take.

[Shane]

I'm gonna take Dom from you. I'm like, oh, you are? You are. And he goes, yeah, I'm gonna take Dom. And he's like, I'm gonna Offer me. Gives me the number, and I go, my man, you are so far off on down. I want you to go talk to Dom and offer that to him, knowing that Dom's gonna go, what are you talking about? You know, but, you know, certain people just, you know, make this job even more fun than it is. And being with him and being able to do this with him and relying on him, you know, that's.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, because we. We obviously have fun with Big Dom. We know him, and he's a great guy, so welcoming. But, like, you've talked about it. You. You do rely on him for your draft analysis, where it's like, hey, take a look at this guy. Let us know what he's made of kind of thing. So is he. He's actively, like, helping you guys out, where it's like, hey, I can figure out, you know, is this guy going to be wired the right way for us?

[Shane]

Yeah, I mean, I'm. I'm 22 years with Dom, Me and Dom, and we started, you know, I started on the side of the table of the vet, and he started, you know, sleeping in hotel lobbies, doing backup security, you know, so we started together and we have an unbelievable bond. And again, like marriages, births, deaths, like, we've been through it all. And so to totally trust him with my life. And so from my perspective, he's got a great feel for players. You know, he understands players, he understands our players, he understands what we need, what I'm looking for. And so if I'm torn on a guy, I'm torn on the guy's fit, I'll send him down. You know, I'll say, hey, go to this school and go hang with this guy. Go to the combine, spend an hour or two with this guy, and I need you to sign off on them.

[Big Cat]

Right.

[Shane]

You know, and, and I don't even tell him what he knows. I'm interested because I won't waste his time. But from my perspective, because I know if that guy comes in and has an issue and I haven't gone through it, well, it's my fault. You know, it's very easy for me to do. And he. All he wants to do is help this team win.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Yeah, he seems like the best.

[Hank]

What about yourself? Do you evaluate yourself? And I, I would imagine that if you did, you're probably evaluated on different metrics from, from ownership, then you might evaluate yourself on a day to day basis, right?

[Shane]

Yeah. I think what. For me, I have incredible passion for this. I go to bed at night thinking about our team and our roster. I wake up in the morning, think about it. You know, I go on vacation thinking about it. I love it. I love it. I have incredible passion for it. And, and I think that it's probably hard to work for me because I have incredibly high standards. And, you know, I know there's a lot of these, these books that talk about, like, you know, don't micromanage, you know, like, give people the leeway to do it well. You know, I tell Nick, you know, those are probably not people who have a Wikipedia page with their record on it. You know, like at the end of the day we have a record, you know, we win or we lose, and there's a right way to do things in the wrong way. And, and I feel like we, we have a process, and when that process gets out of Hand, I get upset. You know, I want it to be the right way because it is really hard to win in this league, and we're competing against great teams. And so. So, you know, when it doesn't go that way, you know, I'm going to take it over, and I want to be involved in every single thing that we do. I want to know everything that we're doing. There won't be a guy that we bring into this building that I don't watch, you know, because at the end of the day, I say, tell our scouts. If you like a guy, tell me, and I will watch him, but we're not going to draft him if I don't know about him, you know, because I don't want to stand up in front of God and everyone and talk about a player that I have no idea who he is, is.

[Big Cat]

And.

[Shane]

And that. I'm not saying that's right or wrong, but that's how I feel. So from my standard, it's. It's my responsibility, you know, I got to take accountability when things don't go right. And I'm not going to be perfect, but I'm going to try my best to be perfect. And so the mistakes kill me, you know, And I think about our, you know, our process, you know, free agency. If I could have had another guy and went another direction. I think about what I'm thinking about in that, why I made that decision. If I'm picking between two guys in the draft, I let the other. I go. I will follow that guy freaking religiously and beat the shit out of myself on it. And I just. I want us to be great, you know, I really do.

[Hank]

So how many does every scout get a stand on the table? Like, this is my guy, you know, we do.

[Shane]

We. We do. We have a red star meeting where guys get to put a red star on one guy in the draft and basically talk about why they're their favorite player. And that's character, play, temperament, skill set. And it's really fun. It's. It's a fun meeting to do. And we end up taking a lot of those guys because those guys. Those guys are easy to like. You know, our guys know what we're looking for, and so they're guys that. That are fun. And when we go through our drafts, you'll see our. Our content team will always come up and they'll show a red star meeting, and it'll be like, oh, we got that guy. We got that guy. Yeah, because those are the guys. We're passionate, passion, About.

[Big Cat]

Does it have to be within the range of your pick? Because I would just cheat if I was a scout. And I, like, this year, I would have been like, Abdul Carter. Yeah, that's my Red Star. Yeah.

[Shane]

I love that you got to bring a giant into Philadelphia country, but do.

[Big Cat]

They have to be in the range?

[Shane]

They don't. They don't.

[Hank]

Okay, So I could really.

[Big Cat]

Don't you just take the number one consensus?

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Every year.

[Shane]

Yeah. I mean, it wouldn't. It wouldn't show a lot of growth as a scout.

[Big Cat]

That doesn't matter. I'm fine with plateauing. I could work for an NFL team.

[Hank]

March Manning, no problem.

[Big Cat]

Red star.

[Shane]

Red Star.

[Hank]

Red Star guy.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. I'm fine with that.

[Shane]

I know, but everyone's in the room. Our coordinators in the room, our owners in the room. You know, all of us are in the room.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Think about how sick it would be if they're like, oh, damn, Abdul Carter was pretty good. I told everybody. Smart.

[Shane]

I mean, well, how do you think I react in that moment right there? I'm gone. I give that glare.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Do you know that this show is actually listened to by a lot of scouts, which always shocks us whenever we go on the road? And they always are like, yeah, we just want to turn our brains off and listen to basically two guys be wrong about football.

[Shane]

Oh, yeah.

[Big Cat]

And I. I take that as a compliment.

[Shane]

You know what? We're on par with this. Perfect. I can join in. Yeah, perfect.

[Big Cat]

But they just. They're like. We're like, you listen to us. You know so much about football. We know nothing. And they're like, yeah, that's the fun of it. Because we just kind of laugh at.

[Shane]

I'm glad I can. Crazy things I can add to that. You know what? You know what's funny? When you were swinging that, I thought, you're swinging Mezcal.

[Big Cat]

Oh, that'd be wild.

[Hank]

You brought a nice gift of Mezcal for everybody. You're gonna get us drunk.

[Big Cat]

I appreciate that. Thank you.

[Hank]

Has anybody ever pitched you some, like, crazy pseudo science? Like, I think I've got. I. I cracked the code to figuring out whether guys are going to be winners or not.

[Shane]

Oh, my gosh. I. Delete those emails.

[Big Cat]

We have one. You want one?

[Shane]

What we got?

[Hank]

Well, I was. I was going to say, yeah, if you have long hair, you can't win a Super bowl.

[Big Cat]

As a quarterback.

[Hank]

As a quarterback. Never been done.

[Big Cat]

Never been done.

[Shane]

Interesting.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Think about something to think about.

[Big Cat]

How.

[Shane]

Something to think.

[Big Cat]

So that's. You have A quarterback now, you know, in 10 years, 15 years, plays for a long time. You're still here. Long hair quarterback.

[Shane]

Is it at any point in their.

[Hank]

Life or because Tom Brady has had long hair.

[Shane]

So they, so if we get a quarterback with long hair 15 years from now, Jaylen's career is done and he comes in, I can tell him to cut his hair and then we're good, it's over.

[Big Cat]

Fine.

[Hank]

Tight.

[Big Cat]

These are the things we thought.

[Shane]

Send me that email right now.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Remember this?

[Hank]

Why did I just give you the key to the, the kingdom? She kept that one to myself. Yeah, I, I just like the, the draft advice that Bill Belichick said, which is I like drafting guys with big asses.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Look at their do spend time looking at guys asses and be like, that's an NFL ass.

[Shane]

I, I, I really feel like that's a loaded question right there, you know, so I'm gonna stay away from that one. You know, body types.

[Big Cat]

He's got a motor.

[Hank]

He's got a motor.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, but you need a big ass. All right, well, Howie, this has been awesome. I have one last question. Roback question. Rho B-A-K.com promo code, take 20 off your first purchase. Q zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts. Roback.com promo code, take. What point in the season have you.

[Shane]

Been an auctioneer in your past life?

[Big Cat]

It's basically our play call.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

So I have it down. It's the only one I can get. At what point in the season do you have to let go? Is that a weird question? Because I know obviously there's always fringe moves you can make, but is there a moment in the season that you're like, I kind of cooked it. Let's just see how it goes out.

[Shane]

I always joke, I'll say to Nick, roster cut day. Once we do practice squads, like I always go, like, I'll like throw them my key. As I'm like leaving that night, I'll throw them the keys. And I'm like, here are the keys. You drive.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Shane]

And, but that's not really true because we still got the trade deadline. I feel like it's really. Trade deadline?

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Shane]

After the trade deadline, it's like, this is what we got.

[Big Cat]

Is that a nerve wracking thing or kind of a freeing thing?

[Shane]

It's a nerve wracking thing because at the end of the day, happens in the NFL and you lose guys and at that point you're all in, you know, and you really do anything about it and if something happens, you're going to have to find different ways to do it. And I think from. From my perspective, being this so long, you've had times where you get to November and December and you lose somebody and you're like, damn, I wish the trade deadline was still going. But, you know, that's. That's why we got depth. That's why we bring in a lot of good players, and that's why we have a team.

[Big Cat]

And.

[Shane]

And so I think that's really the moment where it's just like, all right, you know, I'm on to 20, 26, and this is what we got got. You know, it's interesting because last year we didn't make any trades at the trade deadline, which is, like, unusual. You know, I'm sure you're saying.

[Big Cat]

That.

[Hank]

Was probably the last one.

[Shane]

Yeah, we don't. We don't really. We don't really do that often a trade deadline, so they should make it.

[Big Cat]

Later because teams would get.

[Shane]

Trying to, you know, teams would get.

[Big Cat]

More desperate and there'd be more activity.

[Shane]

But they want to. I understand. They want to also keep interest alive. More teams in the playoffs. You know, you. You don't want to do it. It's just like, what, what you talk about, like, nobody's making a trade that they don't think is in the best interest of their team. Like, nobody has some Jedi mantrix going on that. It's like, you will do this move with me, and then it's like, it happens, you know, I think you just.

[Hank]

Did it to me.

[Big Cat]

If there's anyone, it's you, but. Yeah, go ahead. Way to get us off the set.

[Hank]

Yeah, you can take Jane Daniels.

[Shane]

But. But I think that I. That is a constant conversation. We moved into it a little bit later this year, and we continue to have discussions like that because it. It is fun, you know, I mean, I even. You asked about other sports. Like, I will watch the baseball trade deadline. Curious, because I have a lot of friends who are GMs in baseball. Like, what are they doing? How are they adding to their team? And I love. I don't know all those players as well, but I love seeing how teams are doing that, how aggressive they get in an effort to win a championship. Because when that confetti falls, man, it's.

[Big Cat]

Got to feel pretty good.

[Hank]

Somebody just ripped one.

[Shane]

Yeah, that's what it sounded like.

[Big Cat]

We just got a good rep. That was you, Shane?

[Hank]

Shane, did you just rip one in front of Howie?

[Shane]

Shane?

[Big Cat]

How could you do that?

[Hank]

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[Big Cat]

Okay, we now welcome on a very, very, very special guest. Recurring guest, I think. Fourth time. Yeah, fourth time it is. Von Miller. This is Grit Week, presented by. Hey, dude. Von Miller on the Washington Commanders. I feel like we're just following you around because I think we interviewed you in Denver, in Buffalo, and now here. Great to talk to you. Actually, we might have interviewed you in LA too.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, yeah. We're on a world tour, man.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, we're doing it. So we start every grit week interview the same. What does the word grit mean to you?

[PFT Commenter]

Grit. You know, I'm thinking of the work type of fashion and, you know, just coming in, working early mornings, late nights, barely eating, just putting the work in. If I'm thinking of, like, the other grit, it's that. That grit that's in the bottom of your shoe and you walk around with no socks on. Would I take the first one, though? I didn't take the first one.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

The way you described it, sound like you were talking about chickens.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, right. Yeah. I mean, you know, chicken farming is a gritty job, too.

[Big Cat]

Too.

[Hank]

Let's talk about the birds.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, they're gritty.

[Big Cat]

They're.

[PFT Commenter]

They're gritty too.

[Hank]

Or wake up early.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Don't eat that much.

[PFT Commenter]

Go to sleep late. Yeah.

[Hank]

Produce everything for you.

[PFT Commenter]

You know, it's funny. It's funny because when somebody calls you a chicken, it's kind of like cowardly. But if you ever, like, watch, like, roosters in the coop, they're really some of the toughest animals in the. In the animal kingdom, though. They're pretty cool.

[Hank]

We gotta take that word back.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, we gotta.

[Hank]

I feel the same way about the word. Pussies are, like, the strongest things ever. Like, they're. Think about it.

[Big Cat]

Delicious.

[Hank]

So strong. We all come from one.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

It made us who we are today.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. See? Yeah. We all in. We in the same spot.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. All right. So how's. How's the. You know, you sign with the commanders. You're on the commanders. You're new. Really? Actually, the only question I was really worried about asking you is, have you farted around the guys?

[PFT Commenter]

No, not yet.

[Big Cat]

Okay, but what are you. Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Are you holding it back on purpose?

[PFT Commenter]

I'm with. I'm with the guys. Guys. We all grown men. If I have to do it, like, I'm gonna do it, but, you know, only been on the team for. It's. It's been a week in a day.

[Big Cat]

Okay. Because your reputation does precede yourself.

[PFT Commenter]

They'll see. They'll see. But I haven't. I haven't got there yet. I haven't got there yet.

[Hank]

Are you waiting for somebody else to fart and then.

[PFT Commenter]

No, I just. I don't know what it is. I don't know if it's my diet now or whatever it is. I just haven't. It hasn't been crazy like it normally has, man. I don't know what's going on.

[Big Cat]

Are you nervous that, like, the first one, like, you know.

[PFT Commenter]

No, I'm gonna let it rip.

[Big Cat]

Squeaker.

[PFT Commenter]

I'm let it.

[Big Cat]

Oh, dude.

[PFT Commenter]

I'm gonna let it rip, and I'm not going to. Gonna show a reaction at all, and I'm just gonna act like it's. It's normal.

[Hank]

That's Dan Quinn's favorite saying. Let it rip.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, I'm gonna let it rip. I'm gonna let it rip. And this. I'm 36 years old with other grown men. I'm not gonna have a reaction at all.

[Hank]

Okay, so. So when you signed with the commanders, I was telling These guys, like, 30 minutes later, I got DM from you saying, like, when are we going to do the podcast?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, you were.

[Hank]

You were excited to come apart my. Is there any take that you're, like, looking to get off your chest?

[PFT Commenter]

No, I just, you know, I really enjoy the show, man, and I just wanted to keep it going. And I know this is. This is your team, and, you know, I just. I just wanted to be a part of it again.

[Big Cat]

I love it.

[Hank]

We appreciate you, and welcome to dc. Can you still get after the passer?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, I can still do that. That's one of the easiest things. That's what I do best in life. You know, I might not be as fast or as quick as I was, like, when I was 21 years old, but, you know, that's. That's one of my gifts. That's what I do better than anything else. You know, I rest the pastor. You know, I'm a comedian. Y' all supposed to laugh.

[Hank]

Yeah, yeah, I laughed. I was waiting for a fart. I was gonna say, that's really funny.

[PFT Commenter]

But, yeah, I mean, Russian pastors is one of my gifts, man. And like I said before, it might not be like it was when I was 21, but I'm still pretty effective.

[Big Cat]

What do you. Have you thought about how many years you have left? Is it, like, in your mind, where are you just trying to be like, hey, I'm taking it year, year.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. I'm just taking it year by year, man. You know, whatever God gives me, I'm gonna take it. You know, I had said before, you know, you don't want to get kicked out the league, but you don't want to leave too early. And I'm. I'm still in that sweet spot, man. I still, you know, get. I still get butterflies in my stomach when I'm going to work, and, you know, I still enjoy going to practice. I Enjoy being around the guys. I still enjoy, you know, playing football in the National Football League. So as long as, you know, God gives me an opportunity to do it, I'll do it.

[Hank]

Yeah. Did you. You obviously enjoyed your time in Buffalo. Did you like. Did you like the cold weather?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, it grew on me. It definitely grew on me. You know, I actually started to love the cold weather. The whole Buffalo Bills fan base and the whole Buffalo Bills organization, they're just a shade of the quarterback and the head coach, and they have a really great head Coach with Coach McDermott. And Josh Allen is fucking Josh Allen. So that whole city, that whole organization, that whole fan base is just the shade of those two guys. Guys, Buffalo is a hard place to get to, but it's even harder to leave, man. And I'm gonna miss those guys, man. I'm gonna miss Brandon Bean, you know, I'm gonna miss those guys. Nate Bresky, Joe Mika, you know, Ed Oliver, you know, Greg Russell. All of my guys that I kicked it with. Josh Allen, man. I'm. Miss those guys.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, sure. Did you end up having a favorite wings place?

[PFT Commenter]

You know, I didn't. You know, I'm. You know, I'm a chicken guy.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

So all the wings were great. All the wings were great. But, you know, I spent most of my time at home, too. You know, I got kids and stuff, so my chef was really good. My chef Nick. Shout out, Chef Nick.

[Big Cat]

Shout out, Chef Nick.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, he did. He did a great job, man. And he. He made sure we had everything at home, so I spent a lot of time at home.

[Hank]

You look like you're in pretty good shape.

[Big Cat]

Yep.

[Hank]

Best shape of your life.

[PFT Commenter]

I wouldn't say the best shape, but.

[Big Cat]

That'S a good, honest answer.

[PFT Commenter]

I wouldn't say the best shape, but I'm in pretty good shape. And honestly, out of my 15 years playing in the National Football League, this is probably the best I've felt. You know, two weeks into training camp, DQ does a great job. There's no pride or no ego behind it. You know, he's not trying to get the guys callous. He's not trying to make the guys hard. He's just. He wants the guys to, you know, be healthy. He wants us to be sharp on our playbook, sharp on our assignments. Wants us to be tough guys for sure, but he wants us to be healthy, most importantly, man, and I really appreciate that.

[Big Cat]

What, so the best shape of your life? We joke about it because training camp starts and every media, you know, outlet is like, oh, here this guy's shocking everyone. Do you guys see that? Do you, do you like, you know, see the media talking about it and be like, all right, this is just training camp. Like, who the cares?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, I mean, it's really not much to talk about right at this point. Except that. Yeah, except that it happens every single year. It's really not much to.

[Big Cat]

About.

[PFT Commenter]

Talk about, you know, but, you know, the, the, the headlines have come soon enough and we just got to get out this phase of, you know, the first two weeks of training camp, then we start playing preseason games and it'll be more to talk about for sure.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

What's your mindset in terms of, like, young pass rushers? Do you fall into the camp of people who are like, yeah, I'm going to mentor them, I'm going to work with them, show them what I know? Or are you like, that's not really my job to teach them. That's the coaching staff's job. My job is to make the roster and have a starting spot.

[PFT Commenter]

My job is to make sure we have the best team that we possibly can have. If that's working with the young pass rushers, cool. If that's talking to the third string safety, cool. If that's giving input on special teams, cool. If that's talking to coach about stuff that I did at other places, cool. All I want to do is win, and I do whatever it takes to win. You know, when I was young, I used to hate when the old guys used to come up to me and be like, oh, we used to do it like that. We used to do it like this. You know, back in my day, I never wanted to be that guy. So as I get older, I probably. I do more listening. I do more listening than anything else. But if it's a place for me to interject some knowledge, if God's asked me a question, man, I'm an open book. I love, you know, paying information that I have for. It's not nothing that's coming from me. It's things that I've learned From, you know, DeMarcus Ware, Aaron Donald, Peyton Manning, Andrew Whitworth. All the information that I've. That has been paid to me before, I just pay it forward. So. So I'm not telling none of the guys, none of the stuff that I was doing. I'm telling the guys what I should be doing. But I do more listening than I do talking.

[Big Cat]

All right, along those lines, has there any. Has there been anyone in all your travels who has asked you to teach them the Ghost move and you. And they've been able to actually do it.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, yeah. AJ Epanessa.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[PFT Commenter]

In Buffalo, you know, we talked a lot. We talked about a lot about past Russian moves, and he's like 6, 6, 6, 5, 6, and he's real, real bendy and he was able to do it. But I told those guys, like, out of 129 sacks, like, I probably got a sack on a ghost move five times.

[Big Cat]

But it looks so cool.

[PFT Commenter]

That's what gets highlighted, the spins and all that stuff. But, you know, I tell him, like, that's just the curveball. That's just the knuckleball. That's not what I'm leading with. I like to get off the ball as fast as possible and just. I'm just able to react to whatever the offensive lineman is doing. I'm not a big move guy. I honestly think pass rush moves are. Are overrated.

[Big Cat]

Really?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. Out of my 129 sacks, sacks, 90, 95. 90, 95 sacks have come off some type of speed to power element. So my stress is speed, so I win mostly on power. Power guys, you know, their stress is power and they win on finesse moves. So it's just the opposite. It's just playing a mind game. But honestly, I really do think, you know, pass first moves are overrated.

[Big Cat]

You're saying because you're a speed guy, you win a lot on power because they're set up for the speed and then you hit them with the power.

[PFT Commenter]

Yes, sir.

[Big Cat]

That's awesome.

[Hank]

That's.

[Big Cat]

I mean. Yeah, I mean, I guess that would make sense that it's just. It's. It's something that we love watching the highlight ones. But when it comes down to it, the stronger, faster guys usually win.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, it's how fast you can get from point A to point B and not really a big move guy. Most of my sex come from some type of speed to power element.

[Big Cat]

Ghost move is awesome, though. It is cool because then the guy looks and he's blocking nothing and it.

[PFT Commenter]

Gets a lot of views and everybody likes doing it. But, like, you know, honestly, I don't. I don't do that stuff a lot. But. But it's just a knuckleball off of my speed rush.

[Hank]

If the ghost move doesn't work, then that looks really bad on you.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, you. You 15 yards up the field and guy saying, what is he doing? And then quarterback scramble and go for a first down and everybody looking at you. Crazy. Yeah, for sure. When stuff don't work, that's that's on and off the football field. When you try something and you trying to hit a home run and it don't work, you. You definitely look stupid out there.

[Hank]

So in all your travels, have you run across a teammate that has been like, dude, you kiss your dad on the lips?

[PFT Commenter]

No, man. That was like. So that was. Bro, that was. That was years ago.

[Hank]

That was a wild facetime that you did.

[PFT Commenter]

It was.

[Hank]

As a father, you can appreciate now.

[PFT Commenter]

I still talk to my dad about that though. I still talk to my dad about that though. And whenever I'm watching, sometimes it comes up with Tom Brady and stuff. But yeah, if my dad watching it. I still try to kiss my dad on the lips too, but his reaction to him, as he's gotten older, he's gotten a whole lot faster. He'll be sleep, and I try to come kiss on the lips and he'd just be up quick. He just be up. I've been trying to do it ever since then, but he's like, like, you know, he's, he's. He's on top of it now.

[Big Cat]

What about your kid?

[Hank]

Move. You got to go. You got to go power on him.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, I just, I got to just hold his arms down.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

He would be so pissed. He would be so pissed.

[Big Cat]

What about your kids? Are they. Are they going the other way where they're like, cuz you're trying to kiss.

[PFT Commenter]

On the lips and so honestly, like, I don't do that with my kids, but I. My oldest son, Valor, he's a class clown. Like he. He is just. He's the identical version of me. So I know whenever he gets older, I'm gonna catch so much hell from Valor. And when he sees this interview, 20 years from now, he'll probably be holding me down and forcing me to kiss him too. But no, I don't really like ingrained in those guys early. No, I don't.

[Big Cat]

You holding your dad down to get a kiss on the lips. So funny.

[Hank]

Gotcha.

[Big Cat]

It's so funny. You did ayahuasca with Aaron Rodgers. How was that?

[PFT Commenter]

It was. It was amazing. I didn't know what to expect, you know, done magic mushrooms and all that shit before. I wasn't sure what to expect. I was invited by Jordan Poirier, and when I went, I didn't even know a Rod was coming until we got out there and he told me like, Aaron Rodgers was coming. I had met a Rod before and we got like a personal relationship before. We used to work out at Proactive in la. Played against him a whole bunch of times. But I didn't really know what to expect, man. And, you know, that ceremony went in, and just spending that week with a rod, man, it was definitely life changing, really. People ask me about ayahuasca and what it does, really, it just boils down to. It just creates awareness about everything in your life. And it was definitely. It was definitely eye opening for me. And I try to go back at least once a year. For sure.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. What about that tent that's so hot?

[PFT Commenter]

So that's the temp. It's really like a sauna.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

But it's got. It's got like a spiritual element of it, you know, whenever you. Whenever you do hard things and you're able to get through, it's this sense of empowerment. It has so many different, like, meanings involved in it, too, you know, the night before, I think it was our second ceremony, like, I was just sweating like crazy. And, you know, you're supposed to be quiet in the ceremony. And I was like, bro, I couldn't be quiet. I was like, brother, there's no fucking way it's this hot in here. And everybody started laughing, and we talking about it, like, the next day, and it was like, you know, we got Tim Mezcal the next day. And I was like, man, I don't know if I'm gonna be able to do it. Like, I'm gonna get in here and, like, I'm not gonna be the first one to leave, but when somebody leaves, I'm gonna be the second one. Yeah, but we just. Everybody just kept everybody accountable, and nobody left. So I had to, like, tough it out, man. And I'm glad I did because it definitely showed me so many things about myself.

[Hank]

There's all good vibes in there, I imagine. It's like, you have to be. Everyone's got to trust each other, right?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. So many good vibes, man. I think doing it my first time with a rod, and I think that was probably his 15th time. It was Jordan's second ceremony. I think having it be my first time doing it with those guys that were experienced, I definitely drew strength from those guys, man. Like, you know, being with a rod and just feeling his energy, man, and, you know, he was just riding that wave, man. And you look up and he's dancing and enjoying it. It definitely showed me that I can get up and dance, too. So that first ceremony was definitely amazing, bro. And, you know, I'm a huge advocate for ayahuasca. I try to go back at least once a Year, did you?

[Big Cat]

There was no chance you brought up football at any point in this trip, Right? Would that be weird or frowned upon with a rod?

[PFT Commenter]

Talk about. No, no, we didn't talk about. We talked about life and, you know, so many different correlations in life that you get from that. And, yeah, just being around a guy, he, you know, his. His life is totally different from mine. He deals with, you know, things that are totally different from what I deal when I deal with things that are totally different from him. But being able to be around him and his energy and his aura and all of those guys, man, we were able to just draw strength from all of those guys.

[Big Cat]

That's awesome.

[Hank]

Does it change the way that you. You approach your career or your job?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, 100%. It just showed me, you know, you get caught up in football, especially football players. We just want more. More, more. Like more money, more contract, more houses, more. More clothes, more females. More, more, more. And sometimes more isn't what you need. Sometimes it's. It's just really dialing in to what you have and, you know, really just staying grounded. And I really realized when I was on that trip that, you know, nothing in life happens by coincidence. And. And what's for me is for me. And if it's not, it's not. And that I drew peace from that. Some people might get scared about that. You know, I control what I can control, but at the end of the day, you know, if it happens, it happens, and if it doesn't, it doesn't. And I. And I have a sense of peace from that.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Very cool. So I'm very excited to have you in dc. Very excited to watch you get after the passer here. Have you found a guy, is there a guy that went to Texas that you can start just fucking with right off the bat?

[PFT Commenter]

No. So when I first got here, so Coach Pagano was my coach in Denver. I was with him for all the OTAs and half of the season before I got traded to la. And Coach Magano is the. He's the senior defensive assistant here. So he knows me. He knows, like, I'm a jokester, class clown, prankster. Like, my first couple of days, you know, I was just trying to figure it out. I didn't have my driver's license yet. You know, when you take mom's car out, when you don't have your driver's license, you're driving with, you know, high and tight, seat belt on, like, seat not recline, music down. You really just trying to get the lay of the land, you're not trying to get pulled over, but when you just start to learn the guys and being around the guys now I can, you know, let the seat back, turn the music up, nice and lean. You put the 10 on the car. So I'm really just trying to just really just trying to learn the guys. And then through that learning period, my personality has started to come out. But I'm a weekend now. Like, the guys know me now.

[Hank]

It's the first fart. The first fart is going to break the ice.

[PFT Commenter]

It's going to go crazy, for sure.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. What. When you played on the Rams, you won a Super Bowl, What. What was it like playing with Aaron Donald? Is he the strongest guy that you've ever seen in the locker room?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, man, he was. He was amazing, man. Just. That's one of the. He had his. The energy about Aaron Donald, man, was great, man. And that. That, honestly, leaving the Los Angeles Rams and leaving Aaron Donald specifically was one of the hardest things that I had to do and go to a new spot. We had just won a Super bowl, you know, Aaron Donald. Aaron Donald, one of the greatest defensive players that ever played. Never mind what the offense does, never mind what we do on defense. Me and Aaron Donald running games together and being able to rush together. We was going to get sacks, and we only played half a season together. So that was one of the toughest things that I had to do, man, is really leave that situation and go to the Buffalo Bills. I got a lot of respect for Aaron Donald. He had won everything. He had led the league in sacks. He had been defensive player of the year. He did everything but win a Super Bowl. And, you know, his. His mentality and his mindset, his aura was all about winning Super Bowls while I was there. And it was just a joy to be around, man. He was a great player to be around. Not just him, but, you know, Jalen Ramsey, Leonard Floyd, that was a really good defense. Greg Gaines, like, all of those guys, man, it was a super. It was. It was. It was a joy to be around those guys.

[Big Cat]

It was hard to leave that defense or the Broncos defense. The Broncos defense was pretty insane.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, it was. I don't like to get caught up in comparisons because somebody gonna see this and be like, what, you mad?

[Big Cat]

What? Nah.

[PFT Commenter]

Well, we can beat those guys. But I tell you what, both of those teams had. Both of those teams were special. And it's like having two kids. Like, you love them both the same, but, you know, they both different, too. But I love them Both the same.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

There's been a lot of discourse about that Broncos team because people are talking about Cam Newton. I think they're doing, like, Cam Newton. Jalen hurts comparisons. You have to compare everything, but that's led to people being like, oh, Cam wasn't that good. He's not as good as you remember. But, I mean, you've matched up against him. You played a great game against him. Can you just talk about, like, Cam Newton as a player and how special he was?

[PFT Commenter]

Man, Cam Newton playing was. He was a hell of a player. You know, not just that 2015 season, but leading all the way up to that. That 2015 season. Like, he was the typical. He was the prototypical quarterback. Like, he. He set the stage for all the quarterbacks. Now he can run, he can throw. He was big. He was strong. He was fat. He had great personality and charisma. And I had saw that. That interview with Cam Newton, and I think people just. People just don't like Cam Newton. So they just get. They just shooting at the messenger. But his hats, his messenger. His message was legit. Like, they don't do that with everybody else. You know, people can say, this is top 10, top 5. And they never say that to any of those other guys. They never compare their careers.

[Big Cat]

They just.

[PFT Commenter]

They just go with the message. But since Cam Newton was such a great player, they always try to compare him to whatever he's saying, whatever quarterback he's talking about.

[Big Cat]

About.

[PFT Commenter]

But he's definitely qualified to. To have his opinion. For sure.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

But you know what I'm saying, it's like, he can say that, but if he's got, like, a wide brim with a full peacock tail on top.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

His style is different. His style is different. His style has always been different. And just because, you know, it's. It's foreign to us doesn't mean that it's not. It's not cool, though. But it's cool to him.

[Hank]

So he's the coolest guy on the planet.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Like, we had him in the office, and it was like, that's.

[Big Cat]

That.

[Hank]

He is so cool. It's. It's unreal. I'm just saying that if you were inclined to disagree with him already, the fact that he's wearing that hat makes you disagree harder.

[PFT Commenter]

If you don't like his swag, you don't wear anything that he's talking about. But he's definitely qualified to say whatever he wants.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. When he beat the. Out of those two guys and his hat didn't even Come off his head. You saw that video. That was like, okay. Because, like, if you can keep your hat on for that. Yeah, he's just. He's just. Right.

[PFT Commenter]

He's huge, too. Like, I. He was at the pastor summit two years ago. He. He just happened to be in Vegas, and he. We had like, a after party at Live, and he had cancer and his hair was, like, up to. He seemed like he was seven foot tall. And he had got bigger, too. I was like, geez, this guy's. He's fucking huge, though. But, like, yeah, Cam Newton, he's qualified to say whatever he wants to say. He's a quarterback. He's played at a high level, all the way up from high school, college, NFL. Like, people just don't like the messenger. It's not really the message, because his message is legit, but they just don't like him, so they just start attacking him.

[Big Cat]

All right, because you can't compare. What's your favorite color combo uniform you've.

[PFT Commenter]

Worn in your career?

[Big Cat]

Oh, ones that you met, you felt like you're the fastest. You know, you put them on Denver.

[PFT Commenter]

All orange, the color Rush jerseys in Denver. Like, just so sweet, man. And, yeah, being away from Denver and, like, you know, at first it's like, yeah, I'm on a new team. And like, as time goes, like, by, like, you just miss those days, man. I had spent so much time in Denver, man, They're doing so many good things with that organization. Building a new facility and. And new stadium, and everything is just going crazy. Got a good team. Now he's like, damn, man. Like, it's like seeing your. Your old girlfriend with a new guy and she's happy you, like.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, because at first it still got the spank thing, but at first you were. At first you were. You won the breakup because it. You left and then Nathaniel Hackett. So you're like, wow, that's.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, I'm glad I'm here. But now she's starting to get in shape, and, like, she's starting to look good now, and he's bouncing back and you're like, dang. Like, I should send that. Hey, Big head text.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. All right. I got one last question.

[Hank]

Great personality on Nathaniel Hackett, though, we should say.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, he is great, too. He had him on Grit Week that year. And so it took us, like, maybe 10 weeks before we started criticizing him. It was a blind spot for us. We tried to take care of our own, but, yeah, maybe not the best head coach. Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

It just didn't work. And maybe it Just didn't work with the Russian. The Russell Wilson combination.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, he would have.

[PFT Commenter]

Aaron Rodgers, you know, it would have been a little bit different.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Yeah, I know.

[PFT Commenter]

People in Bronco's country were. Were banking on that reunion and kind of had to go with. With plan B with Russell Wilson.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. All right, I got one last question. Rollback question. Rho, B, A, C, K.com promo code. Take 20 off your first purchase. Q, zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts. Roback.com promo code, take. Kind of a tough question, but I want your. Because you. You're honest with us. Us, and you actually give us, like, honest answers. Have you thought at all about your hall of Fame acceptance speech? Has it just ever, like, creeped in your head?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. So I've been to four hall of Fame ceremonies. Ron Dawkins, Champ Bailey, Peyton Manning, and DeMarcus Ware. And whenever I'm there and, like, watching those guys, like, go through their speech and, like, they're just so great at. And it's just so motivating. Like, I think about it when I'm in Canton, like, I think about, like, what I'm gonna say, who I'm gonna have, like, intro with me. I think about those things whenever I'm there. But when I come back to my team, like, I got my head down and I'm. And I'm still trying to, you know, add to that legacy for sure.

[Big Cat]

Because it is kind of cool. I mean, you're still playing and you're a no doubter, hall of Famer. You know that?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Like, deep down, you just know it. You know you're gonna be voted in. So it's kind of a cool feeling.

[PFT Commenter]

I'm sure it's cool. And like, at that, those small moments in time whenever I'm watching a Hall of Fame game or. Or whenever I'm there, like, watching guys that I played with go. Like, I think about it then, but other than that, man, I still got my head down, and I'm still trying to add to that legacy, and I'm still trying to add up that. That invitation list. Like, I want guys from Washington to want to come. Yeah, it's from Buffalo to want to come. And, you know, I care about welcome. I care about what these guys say about me, man, and what these guys think of me, man. And I'm still trying to win over these guys. So that's what I'm focusing.

[Big Cat]

You got to kiss your dad on the lips on this.

[PFT Commenter]

I will.

[Big Cat]

Like, that's where you do it.

[PFT Commenter]

I will on the stage, man. I hold him down. I will hold him down. It's five years after you play too, so he probably won't have enough strength. I would bear hug him and I would kiss him on the lips. A big wet kiss.

[Hank]

You got any. Any personal goals for this year?

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, man, I just want to go out here and be the best pass rush I could possibly be. Last year, I had shades of me getting back to myself, but the way we played, you know, I was a designated pass rusher. I definitely play a lot more here, and I just want to get back to playing my style of football, man. DQ and, you know, Adam Peters have been so supportive in the type of pass rusher that I want to be and the type of pass rusher that I can be. And I just want to go out there and just play my style of ball. I'm healthy. I'm two years removed from acl, maybe three years removed from acl. Every day it feels a whole lot better. They do a great job keeping us fresh. The Buffalo Bills did a great job keeping me fresh, too. Like. No, I'm not comparing that. But here it's just different. They do a great job of keeping me fresh, man. And y' all should be ready to go fast on. On Sundays, Mondays and Thursdays.

[Big Cat]

Love it. Well, thanks, Vaughn. Always love having you on. And we'll. We'll be there in Canton when you're off.

[PFT Commenter]

I gotta. I gotta send y' all some chicken, man. Yeah, I gotta send y' all some chicken and some. And some swag, man. Green and pastures.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Also, will you do us a favor? Will you just maybe throw out a tweet when you let the first one rip around the boys?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, I got you. Yeah, yeah, it happened.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, it happened. Yeah. Just say it happen. No context.

[PFT Commenter]

I appreciate you guys. All right, thanks, Vaughn.

[Hank]

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[Big Cat]

Okay, boys, Fire fest of the week. Henry, you are up. Yeah.

[Max]

Firefest.

[Hank]

Although it's.

[Max]

It's good and bad, it's bad for me, good for the program, good for my friend, good for my. What are you subject? Student employee.

[Big Cat]

He's your mentee.

[Hank]

Oh, you're talking about me Apprentice.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah. That's you.

[Hank]

Yeah, yeah, I'm your.

[Max]

Oh, no. But, yeah, we PFTA. We. We posted the video on PMT, YouTube. Getting him ready. Internet Invitational next week. Shot at a million dollars. We played nine holes. Wasn't a competition. It was just, you know, just for practice. But if it was a competition, PFT beat me. So that. I've had to live with that for, like, a week.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I.

[Hank]

Actually, Hank, it's interesting you brought that up, because I. My fire fest was going to be that every time I play golf with Hank not on camera, he beats me, and I have to deal with that, you know, like, that's more impactful to me mentally than if it was on camera, because I know that Hank beat me, and he played really, really well when we weren't on camera. But every time. I don't know what it is. Every time we play on camera, I just. I beat him and I beat him. Convincing. But it's the other times. That's what really gets me. I've been beating myself up over that.

[Big Cat]

I'm sorry. Wait. Breaking moves. We got a purple dildo.

[Max]

Oh, no.

[Big Cat]

It's getting out of control. As the buzzer was sounding in the Chicago sky game is a buzzer meter. It was. It was. I can't believe that. All right, Keith, let's. We're out on dildos, I think now that we know it's crypto scams. So, pft, you're saying the. That you. You lose to Hank when the cameras aren't on?

[Hank]

Yeah, like for the last two years, since I've been actually playing golf, since I got my own set of clubs and a bag, for some reason, whenever Hank and I play off camera, he beats me. But people don't know that because every time that we're on camera, we played against each other. I beat him.

[Max]

And this one wasn't a competition, for.

[Hank]

The record, but it wasn't a competition. But you do keep scoring golf.

[Big Cat]

Damn. It's true.

[Hank]

And so when your score is lower, then you're the winner. And it's just like every time it's on camera, I happen to win those. And I think people are getting the wrong idea that. That Hank might not be better than me at golf, but when people aren't watching, that's when he plays really good.

[Big Cat]

Do you have something to say? Because Memes is cracking up right now.

[Zach]

He just loved Buzzer meter.

[Big Cat]

Oh, okay. Nice.

[Hank]

I'm glad I'm glad you like that one. Memes. I. So, yeah, that. That was going to be my fire fest, but I'm telling you guys, I think I can win the Internet Invitational. I think I can.

[Big Cat]

The way.

[Hank]

The way I played today. Hank's been a great coach. No, I want to take that back. Hank has been a good CEO, but he was a real piece of shit at our bunker practice. I've never, never known how to hit out of a bunker. So I'm out there grinding. I've got a coach shout out Will Smith. That was actually his name, teaching me how to hit a bunker shot. And I'm trying. I'm trying. I'm practicing shot after shot, struggling to get it down, but I'm working hard. Hank comes in, taps me in my shoulder, and goes, you mind if I give it a shot, show you how it's done? During my practice, Hank steps up to the ball, hits it off the pin.

[Big Cat]

Oh.

[Hank]

And then hands me the club back. He's like, all right, that's how you should do it. And then he's acting like he's doing a favor by showing me how to hit a bunker shot. Shot. It was. We got. Almost got into a physical fight in front of my new coach, and he had no idea what the hell was going on. I was like, this guy's a. You don't understand. Hank's a.

[Big Cat]

Hey, PFT hit.

[Max]

I'm not joking. 10 shots in a row, like, directly into the face of the bunker was just rage swinging. Like, I know Pft. He was rage swinging. Like, going negative. Like, going negative. Progress. And I was just like. Like, take a. Take a second. Like, I'll hit one. Take up. Take a breath.

[Big Cat]

Let me show you how it's done.

[Max]

And then he wanted to start rage hitting me.

[Hank]

But after this bunker practice was good. I learned how to hit a bunker shot. I hit several good ones today. I shot a 44 on the front today.

[Big Cat]

Oh, yes.

[Hank]

So pretty happy about the way things are going right now. We'll see which PFT shows up next week. But, I mean, if my rounds against Hanker any indication, I. I tend to play pretty good when the cameras are wrong.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. You maybe need to just, like, carry a picture of. Of Hank in your golf cart and just. Just always be thinking about playing against him, and you'll just dominate.

[Hank]

Yeah, I'll do that.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, Just like, oh, maybe we can get, like, a little Hank doll and you could just have it, like, swinging in front of you as you drive your cart.

[Hank]

That might be infuriating but maybe that's what I need.

[Big Cat]

But it would also be fun if you want to punch it or if.

[Hank]

I want to throw it in the water.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, Drown. The Hank doll. We can get a bunch of Hank dolls. Yeah.

[Hank]

Give it to Blake. Have him rip it apart.

[Big Cat]

We might. I think we. We just came upon a. A little Black Friday merch idea.

[Hank]

The Hank doll.

[Big Cat]

The Hank doll.

[Hank]

I like it. Give it to your dog.

[Big Cat]

We'll have it be, like, intentionally. You can. It's like the breakable chairs or breakable tables in. In wwe. The minute your dog gets it, it just shreds it. I would watch so many of those videos.

[Hank]

Can it be one of the ones where you, like, squeeze or. Or pull a string on and it yawns?

[Big Cat]

Oh. All right. So wait, Hank, what was your fire fest? You kind of got cucked there.

[Max]

No, we.

[Big Cat]

We.

[Max]

We talked about it. We're good.

[Big Cat]

Okay, clear. So you. You don't have one. You're just good at golf?

[Max]

No. No. I lost. Pft.

[Hank]

Multiple times on camera. Yeah, but it wasn't a competition.

[Max]

Multiple.

[Hank]

Yeah, I think every time we've played. Me versus you, I think I've beaten you.

[Big Cat]

On Austin, Texas, Max had that on the ready.

[Memes]

I. I was just filming. I wasn't really, but you had that on anything that was happening.

[Max]

I was not. Saved Max's life.

[Big Cat]

All right, my fire fest. I got two. One is memes. So I memes parents were in town, and he asked if he could use my cubs tickets on Wednesday. And I was like, of course. And then it dawned on me. After I sent it to him, I was like, this motherfucker's gonna try to win the 50 50. And he told me before that he bought 200 worth. And he. He won't tell me what happened. And I. I legitimately think he might have won. And then I realized, too, if he won, I would just be in memes spot, where I would be like, well, it would. They were my tickets. And so we would just be like the mirror image of each other. We'd be like, well, it was my pick in the ball, but it was p. So tell me, did you win? I did not win. Okay, good. I also. My parents looked at me crazy when I bought 200, dude. They were like, why? I was like, I got. I gotta win. I. I don't know why, but on Monday night, I just got it in my head that I was going to win on Monday night, and it. It got a little out of hand, and I didn't win, but I Got it in my head. I was like, this is going to be the one. I just. I felt it. I felt something special on Monday night, and it was so far from special. It's going to happen. I don't think so, man. I don't think so. It's. It was. I was like, this is too much. You like? I was. I. I even went to buy one extra one at the seventh inning, and then it was. There was the 5050 booth that I go to, and then the one of the 5050 guys who goes up and down the aisles was like, hey, big cat. So then I was like, well, I have to buy from him, too. So that I bought two extras in the seventh inning and still didn't win. But all right. Means you did not win. Did not win. But we. We helped inner city schools. That's where the money goes. That there.

[Hank]

Good man.

[Big Cat]

What if.

[Hank]

What if Florio wins?

[Big Cat]

I can live with that.

[Hank]

I can live with that when he's in Chicago. No, you can't. No, you can't. I like Floro instantly.

[Big Cat]

You would become a bigger hater than.

[Hank]

Hank and memes put together.

[Big Cat]

Florio's not gonna. Florio's not gonna spend a lot of money on the 50 50. There's no way.

[Max]

That's why you'd hate it. He'd spend, like, five bucks.

[Big Cat]

If he won like that. Yes. If he won by spending, like, a thousand bucks, I'd tip my cap. If he. If he bought one ticket for $5, I would be furious. Yeah. Yeah. But if he went ball in, if he was like, I'm gonna try to. I'm gonna try to buy this pot, I. I would have to be, like, credit to you, dude. You went. You went for it. And then my other fire presses. I didn't listen to Max during the Mount Rushmore because I should have. The one time he had actually, like, a semblance of a good argument, and I didn't listen to him. That PFT picked himself on the blunt rotation, which is a crazy move.

[Hank]

I didn't pick myself.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, your team is pfd. And Hank. Hank.

[Hank]

Yeah, Hank picked me.

[Big Cat]

No, no, you are a team.

[Memes]

You're an entity.

[Hank]

You're.

[Big Cat]

You're blunt. Your. Your blunt rotation team. Pft. And Hank picked pft. You picked yourself.

[Hank]

I didn't. I told Hank not to pick me.

[Big Cat]

You signed up. Doesn't matter. You. The.

[Shane]

The.

[Big Cat]

It shows team pft. And Hank picked pft.

[Zach]

Pft.

[Max]

No, it'll be team three.

[Big Cat]

Okay, But. But you understand. Who.

[Memes]

Who is team three?

[Big Cat]

When the clip comes out, your team picked yourself. I should have listened to Max memes.

[Memes]

You weren't here for Rushmore that. That day. What are your thoughts?

[Big Cat]

You guys called me on it. Oh, right, right. But it was like. It was such a bad moment for me because usually Max is the one. Yeah, we all called him usually one. Max is the one who walks out of the studio and is like, I should have said that.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

And I walked out of the studio being like, Max was right.

[Shane]

Right.

[Big Cat]

Like, that's never happened to me, and it sucked.

[Hank]

So your point is that the pick should not have counted?

[Big Cat]

No, I. I think it's just a crazy, narcissistic move to pick yourself in a blunt rotation. I.

[Hank]

For the record, I did not pick myself. I've begged not to picked you. And then looking at the graphic, I. I saw it. I was like, this is the worst look of all time on a graphic.

[Memes]

This looks over here.

[Big Cat]

And then Hank. I went to take a piss after, and Hank just was giggling in meft. This is such a banger. I went to take a piss, and I was just like, hank, you know what you did? And he just started giggling in my face. And I was just like this. I was like, just admit to me. You know what you did. He's just giggling. I was like, God damn it. And I. Max had the argument, like.

[Hank]

For the record, I. I agree with Hank that I'm a lot of fun to smoke weed with, but I would not put myself in the top four of all time.

[Big Cat]

But you did. Did.

[Hank]

I didn't.

[Big Cat]

You did. I want that. You did. Your team did.

[Hank]

That's.

[Big Cat]

You are a team, and you picked yourself.

[Max]

It's a good pick.

[Big Cat]

It was a good pick. Pfd.

[Memes]

It's a good pick.

[Big Cat]

You literally were like, I would like to hang out with myself and smoke weed with anyone in the history of the world.

[Hank]

Well, sometimes just smoking by yourself is fun.

[Big Cat]

Blunt rotation. First pick myself because I want to get high. But, yeah, it was more the fact that Max, like, that's a bad feeling. I. You. I hope you guys never have that feeling where. Where you walk out being like, damn, I should have listened to Max. It was. It was kind of like a gut check, like, what's going on with my life.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Really humbling. Really? Yeah. Really hurt. All right, Zach.

[Zach]

My fire fest of the week is I may have to move out of my apartment complex. Something similar has happened in the past to this quick story, but the other night, I was. I was at the house. It was a little late I need to take the trash out. I. I have met some of my neighbors previously. I know I've got a very professional couple, like, two doors down that they leave in suits and like, very business. Not even business casual, like business, business garb. And then there's also a very beautiful woman that's probably two doors down the other direction. I have talked to them in passing, good chats with all of them, but unfortunately it was late. I need to take the trash out. I got caught at the trash chute, not only by my business business neighbors, but the very attractive woman a couple doors down that's been very kind. In my Halloween pajamas, in my Xbox headset. I've never wanted to just melt away.

[Big Cat]

More in my entire life. Why did you take it off? Why did you take off your Xbox headset?

[Zach]

It was going to be so quick, like, down and back to the trash chute. I thought so late at night. And I just. I've never regret anything more. And of course, they're all coming home at the same time. You couldn't have, like, I'm actively on Redfin searching.

[Big Cat]

What. What was the interaction?

[Zach]

The interaction is they both, like, the one girl looks up, she waves. The two business. Business are coming in from maybe a date night or like an outing, and they just kind of, like, acknowledge. I go to say something and just go directly back to the apartment, into my room, into my safe space.

[Big Cat]

I have a very important question for you, Zach. Are the Halloween pajamas. Are they glow in the dark?

[Zach]

It's a skeleton that glows in the dark.

[Hank]

Is it. Is it. Is it the matching set or just.

[Big Cat]

Exactly the ones you're talking about?

[Zach]

It's a matching set.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Oh, my gosh.

[Zach]

Is it your legs in the torso?

[Big Cat]

Oh, no. Zach, Zach. I'll take a picture. I literally. My kids love those pajamas. They wear them. They ask for them almost every night, and you're wearing them. Oh, so do I.

[Zach]

But I'm also not. I'm also not.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Okay. This is Zach.

[Memes]

We're gonna need you to take a picture of yourself in the. I need to see these pajamas.

[Big Cat]

We need the pajamas and the headset. When you get home, we'll put in the YouTube.

[Memes]

Yes, we have to have it.

[Zach]

I'm going right back into them when I get home so I can do.

[Big Cat]

That for you guys. Perfect.

[Hank]

Perfect.

[Big Cat]

And the headset.

[Hank]

Yeah, the headset has to be there. Zach, was it just like a standard generic white trash bag that you were throwing out, or were you throwing out something that was identifiable?

[Big Cat]

No.

[Zach]

So luckily not. Identifiable, but maybe telling because I do just do, like, the grocery bag move because I don't have a lot of trash, so I just do, like the. The Target bag tie up. So maybe they know now that I'm not, like, an official trash can guy as well.

[Big Cat]

Zach, Zach, would it multiple bags.

[Memes]

Wait, you don't own a trash can?

[Zach]

No, I just use the tiny bags and then get rid of them as I go.

[Big Cat]

Well, he's just throwing out McDonald's.

[Hank]

You should get a trash can at some point.

[Zach]

It just feels like it would take forever to fill up those bags. In and out every night.

[Big Cat]

We're good. The best trips to the shoot. Yeah. The best part about Zach saying that he doesn't have a trash can trash bin is that he goes to Target every single week. That that's, like, the number one place to get that.

[Zach]

Yeah, that's where you get all the free bags, though, too. On the checkout. They've got so many bags.

[Hank]

Stock up. Yeah, I do think.

[Memes]

I think a trash can from Target maybe costs, like, $10.

[Zach]

But also, you got to be careful. You can't use the chute for bags that are too big.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Zach]

So now I'm setting myself up to go downstairs.

[Big Cat]

Okay. Hey, hold on, Zach. Let's spin the spin zone this real quick. Okay. The hallway. Good lighting.

[Zach]

Not the best lighting. Pretty, like, pretty dim.

[Big Cat]

Okay. But there's enough lighting that when you got back in your apartment, those glow in the dark skeletons popped.

[Zach]

Hopefully I wasn't glowing. If I was glowing in the hallway.

[Big Cat]

I should have already moved out.

[Hank]

Yeah. So if it's dim in the hallway and it's light in your apartment, they might have seen the skeleton out.

[Zach]

Yeah, no, they saw the skeleton. I just hope it wasn't glowing. They definitely saw me in full skeleton, which is the worst part. Like skeleton Crocs, the Xbox headsets. Almost like just to run to the.

[Big Cat]

What color did you have the pins on them?

[Zach]

They're just white. No Jibbitz, unfortunately.

[Big Cat]

We gotta get you some jibbits.

[Zach]

The shirt was the. The chest and arms of the skeleton.

[Hank]

So you were wearing the full set.

[Zach]

Yes, as one does.

[Shane]

In pajamas.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Okay. God, Zach, that is so funny.

[Zach]

So if anybody needs a roommate or any good knows any good spots, let me know because I might be checking out soon.

[Big Cat]

Oh, that's so good. That's so good.

[Hank]

Oh, man, the girl's not gonna forget you, though.

[Zach]

That's true. I probably did make it to the group chat, just not in ways that I wanted.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, no, Zach, the girls Girls are attracted to, like, guys they can fix. And a dude in glow in the dark skeleton pajamas throwing out a Target bag with the Xbox headset at midnight is a guy who can be fixed.

[Hank]

Yeah, that's the appropriate time of day to be doing that. If, if this was like 1:30 in the afternoon, then that would be a different conversation.

[Zach]

That's a great point.

[Big Cat]

You're right.

[Zach]

It was like prime pajamas hours.

[Big Cat]

I think you only. Yeah, I think you only have to worry about the. The business business couple. They judged the hot girl might have been turned on the bit.

[Zach]

Yeah, business business has never invited me to their, like, cookouts on the patio ever again.

[Big Cat]

If they do, you have to go.

[Zach]

In your pajamas because they know, like, they maybe could have pretended to take me seriously as a neighbor previously. Now they're just like, who's this guy? What's going on here?

[Big Cat]

Oh, man.

[Hank]

They know that. They're definitely not going to ask you for any favors. They're not going to be like, hey, can you come over and feed my cat? Can you walk a business guy?

[Max]

You want to help me with this one?

[Big Cat]

Well, no, don't. Let's not rule out. Let's not judge. What if they're getting pub stomp and smurfed? He is the number one guy you call.

[Zach]

I don't think they game a lot.

[Big Cat]

They scream a lot at each other. I hope not.

[Zach]

But it maybe.

[Hank]

I think the real problem might be that the business guy saw you and now he hates you because he's insanely jealous.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

He's like, this dude. I would trade my entire life to be able to just hang out in my pajamas, play Xbox.

[Zach]

That's fair. Maybe he. I don't. I don't want his suit, though. Do I have to give up my pajamas?

[Hank]

No, no pajamas.

[Zach]

Okay, cool.

[Big Cat]

Right?

[Hank]

You might be the alpha of that apartment complex now. It's like this dude is just. He's living the dream.

[Big Cat]

No, pft's right. That guy definitely had a moment. If he's dressing up in a suit every day and coming home to just scream at his significant other, he's wishing he could throw it all away to get into his skeleton pajamas and game with the boys. Yeah.

[Zach]

In his. In his defense, they are good suits, though. Like, he leaves sharp.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. But you also have glow in the dark pajamas or. Those aren't regular pajamas. Those are the good suits of pajamas.

[Zach]

Because. Do you have a pair as well or just the kids had to ask.

[Big Cat]

I. I haven't. Like, we're actually glossing over the Fact that, like, I don't know anyone else on this podcast but me personally, I don't think I've had a pajama set since I was, like, five years old.

[Hank]

I don't own anything that you would consider to be pajamas.

[Big Cat]

No. I go to sleep in a T shirt and boxers every night. Night.

[Hank]

What does that look, Hank? What you want to say there, Hank?

[Big Cat]

No. Remember Hank? He got robbed. His pajamas got robbed. Yeah.

[Max]

Be like 90% of you wear.

[Hank]

Could be classified as pajamas.

[Big Cat]

Jumpsuit. January definitely gets blurry with pajamas.

[Hank]

It does. It does. But no, I mean, I'm. I'm an underwear man. Go to sleep in underwear. I. I don't think I wore pajamas past the age of 18, Zach.

[Big Cat]

You don't.

[Memes]

That's a good spin zone for you, Zach, by the way.

[Hank]

Like, pft.

[Memes]

Just wears pajamas in public.

[Big Cat]

Like, yeah, could be a lot.

[Memes]

So at least you were. You were in the. The private privacy of your own apartment building, Zach.

[Zach]

That's fair.

[Big Cat]

I want to ask a question. You don't have to answer, but I want to ask it.

[Zach]

Yes, sir.

[Big Cat]

On your bed, do you have any stuffed animals or anything like that?

[Zach]

There's. So I wouldn't classify. I wouldn't call a stuffed animal.

[Big Cat]

What is it? What is it?

[Zach]

It's a Slowbro Squishmallow. So it's not.

[Big Cat]

You have a Squishmallow. My kids also have those. This is actually.

[Zach]

I should have kept that. I should have kept that tucked.

[Big Cat]

Do you. Do you hug your Squishmallow?

[Zach]

No, no, it just goes on the. I just throw it after I make the bed. I throw it up there as, like, garb.

[Max]

Throw a pillow. Yeah.

[Zach]

Festive.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. That's nice. What is the.

[Hank]

Is it the Pokemon?

[Zach]

It is.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Zach]

It's the Pokemon Slowbro.

[Big Cat]

Is it Pikachu?

[Zach]

No, it's a Slow Bro.

[Big Cat]

Oh, Slow Bros. Okay, my bad. He's the guy. I know Pokemon. I'm. I'm obviously. I know Slow Bro.

[Hank]

What's Slow Bro? Is it Slow Poke?

[PFT Commenter]

That.

[Zach]

I don't know. It was a. I originally got it for my brother because it's the mascot of our unofficial, official running team.

[Big Cat]

Team that you didn't take part in. Yes. Oh, Slowbro. I'm seeing him right now. He's a pink Pokemon. This kind of looks like it'd be thrown on a WNBA court.

[Zach]

I don't know how we're sneaking that.

[Big Cat]

In, but we draw it now, Zach.

[Hank]

It's also. It shows that you're a man that has a routine like, you change into your pajamas at the end of the day.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

You've probably got. You don't just, like, hop into bed in your sweats or whatever ever.

[Zach]

No, I'm a. I'm an outside clothes, inside clothes guy. So I'll get home quick, shower pajamas, and then I. Pajamas are just, like, while I'm around the house, like, in the apartment.

[Big Cat]

And then I just.

[Zach]

I just rip boxers to sleep. So out of the pajamas before bed.

[Big Cat]

Oh, those are just that. Those are just pajamas for hanging out.

[Zach]

Yeah. Just the after, like, the late evening lounge situation.

[Big Cat]

Got it.

[Hank]

You want to get comfy with it. Put some. Get some elastic in the situation. Yes, Hank, when you, you know, gaming.

[Max]

Locked in, like, what. What happened in the middle of the game where you're like, ah, I gotta go take the trash out.

[Zach]

I spilled a diet Dr. Pepper.

[Big Cat]

Had to.

[Zach]

You had to clean up a lot of paper towels. And I was like, these have to go. Too much sugar on them. Didn't want any ants.

[Big Cat]

Zach, the more you talk about this, the more what PFD said is correct. I'm jealous of this.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Like you were. You were describing, like, obviously, I love my kids. I wouldn't trade it for the world. But, like, for a minute, I would love to just be like, oh, man. My biggest issue tonight is I spilled my Dr. Pepper while gaming in my pajamas. That's a good night, dude.

[Zach]

Oh, there's silver linings in everything. It is an okay night sometimes.

[Memes]

Max, I have one more question. You said you still had the headset on.

[Zach]

Yes.

[Memes]

Is there any chance you were still. Still connected to your Xbox while this interaction was 3,000%?

[Zach]

My friends heard everything.

[Big Cat]

100 connected.

[Zach]

They knew exactly what was going on.

[Big Cat]

Wait, were you holding the controller? No. No, it was wireless.

[Hank]

Wireless?

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

If you were. If you were holding the controller or if you were yelling at your friends as you're throwing the trash out, were.

[Big Cat]

You talking at all to your friends while you were going on the way to the shoot?

[Zach]

Yeah, just because I thought I was. A quick run. And then as soon as individuals showed up that weren't, like, not expected, instant silence, just head nod. Not a sprint. But I was just out of there.

[Big Cat]

Quick. What a visual. I can't wait to see you in these pajamas.

[Hank]

My favorite with Zach is when he's telling a story that he's a little bit nervous about or a little bit embarrassed about, he starts kind of talking like a cop.

[Big Cat]

Yeah.

[Hank]

He's like. And so at that point, I encountered two individuals and the individuals, and I acknowledge each other. And I had retreat back to my domicile.

[Big Cat]

The. The individuals were wearing suits. They. They approached me from 6 o' clock at a moderate pace. Oh, man. All right. Great fire fest. Great fire fest. And I cannot wait to see this picture. Send us the group chat as soon as you get home. It's so funny. It's so funny. All right, should we Finish with numbers three?

[Hank]

Good job, memes.

[Big Cat]

That was. Good job memes.

[Max]

22.

[Hank]

What's up?

[Big Cat]

Oh, yeah, Pug.

[Hank]

It's a great down.

[Big Cat]

Holding it down. I'll go with 60.

[Memes]

I'll go with 6. 85.

[Hank]

I'll go with 6.

[Big Cat]

99. Put.

[Zach]

I'll go 70 for.

[Shane]

For Sean.

[Big Cat]

Oh, there we go. What you. Oh, because you can't go 118 for all the money he made.

[Zach]

That was unnecessary.

[Big Cat]

Big head.

[Hank]

You want to just tell me when to stop it?

[Big Cat]

You just go. Go for like five seconds. Yeah, and just don't even look. Zach, what was your number?

[Zach]

94.

[Big Cat]

What's yours, Hank?

[Hank]

20.

[Big Cat]

51. 51. Great show, boys.

[Hank]

Love you guys.

[Big Cat]

Sa Sam foreign folks. It's the foreplay, guys. Let's talk Truly Unruly. When you spend every day following the countless laws of golf like us, it's refreshing to get a little unruly. Whether that means using the old hand wedge to escape the bunker or just cracking open a hard seltzer that breaks all the rules, few things feel better. Truly Unruly is the first high alk self seltzer that actually tastes good. It's hard hitting, but still light and refreshing, making it perfect for everything from the front nine to the clubhouse.

[Zach]

Find it near you at trulyhardceltzer.com locations.

[Big Cat]

That's trulyhardselter.com locations.

[Zach]

Hard Seltzer Beverage Company, Boston, Massachusetts.

[Big Cat]

Please drink responsibly.