We Finally Finish Our Previous Dungeons and Dragons Campaign With Timm Woods And Nick Turani

Summary

Podcast Title: Pardon My Take
Host/Author: Barstool Sports
Episode: We Finally Finish Our Previous Dungeons and Dragons Campaign With Tim Woods And Nick Turani
Release Date: February 14, 2025

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Introduction to the Finale

In this highly anticipated episode of "Pardon My Take," hosts Big Cat and PFT Commenter, along with special guests Tim Woods and Nick Turani, culminate their adventurous Dungeons and Dragons (D&D) campaign. The episode marks the grand finale of their multi-session journey, blending humor, camaraderie, and epic storytelling that fans have eagerly awaited.

Reuniting the Party

The episode kicks off with the hosts reassembling their adventuring party after a six-month hiatus. Big Cat enthusiastically remarks on their teamwork:

[01:10] Big Cat: "Really good teamwork on this."

PFT Commenter sets the stage for their D&D vacation, teasing listeners about the immersive journey ahead:

[01:11] PFT Commenter: "One of the best ones. We've done."

Characters and Their Quirks

As the players introduce their characters, it becomes evident that their unique personalities add depth and humor to the campaign:

• Max:

  [05:26] Max: "I am Hippo Maximus, the human druid, and I am dressed as Shredder from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle universe."

• Greg:

  [05:35] Greg: "I am Greg GREG, the human paladin, and I am dressed as Shredder from TMNT."

• Big Cat:

  [05:44] Big Cat: "I am Wayne the Hill dwarf bard. And today... I'm also dressed as Shredder."

• Norm (PFT Commenter):

  [05:57] PFT Commenter: "I'm Norm, the human barbarian. And we obviously didn't talk about this before because we should have planned better. I'm also Shredder."

• Hank:

  [06:07] Hank: "Yeah. And I'll complete the... Complete the five some. I'm Erlich the warlock... I was excited to finish this mission together."

This collective choice to portray themselves as Shredder adds a layer of irony and sets the tone for the ensuing adventures.

Setting the Scene: Forge of Fury

Tim Woods refreshes the party's memory about their previous encounters and objectives:

[08:02] Tim: "We know there's a staircase leading down deeper into the dungeon where these thieves... we need to reclaim the treasure from."

The party reflects on past achievements, such as Norm setting a chugging record in Blasingdell, and Greg's accidental marriage to the high priest, Horn Grim.

The Climax: Battle with the Dwegar

As the adventure intensifies, the party faces formidable foes known as Dwegar, evil dwarves with magical abilities. Key moments include:

• Encounter with the Orc Poopy Stinks:

  [16:15] PFT Commenter: "Oh, no."

  Norm swiftly defeats Poopy Stinks, showcasing his barbarian prowess:

  [44:10] PFT Commenter: "Oh, no."

• Strategic Decisions and Teamwork:
  The party collaborates to tackle the Dwegar, with Big Cat attempting to manipulate statues to reveal hidden doors:

  [24:01] Big Cat: "I would like to make sure that my hypnotization only works on all characters who, at the start of this episode, were not shredders."

  Greg takes a dark turn by murdering his dwarven husband to navigate the treacherous dungeon dynamics:

  [28:13] Tim: "You are hitting him for 12 damage... halfway dead."

Emotional and Humorous Interludes

The campaign is peppered with humorous and heartfelt interactions:

• Norm's Unwavering Aggression:

  [42:49] PFT Commenter: "I want to kill Poopy Stinks."

• Greg's Dilemma:

  [27:23] Greg: "Do I have like some sort of like bracers on my hands, gloves?"

• Hank's Loyalty:

  [26:58] Hank: "I'm also sorry for your loss."

These moments highlight the blend of comedic banter and intense role-playing that defines the podcast's appeal.

Final Confrontation and Resolution

The party finally locates the coveted Axe of Durgedon amidst a dramatic showdown with an aquatic dragon and the traitorous stepsister, Shredette. Key highlights include:

• Max's Transformation and Heroics:
  Max morphs into a hunter shark to retrieve the axe, demonstrating his druidic versatility:

  [129:57] Tim: "...you are able to start climbing down. And realize you're in like this underground lake complex."

• Team Efforts to Overcome Shredette and the Dragon:
  Despite challenges and close calls, the party's collective strength and quick thinking allow them to secure the axe and escape the perilous dungeon:

  [136:00] PFT Commenter: "Shredders always share the axe and turtles."

Conclusion and Reflections

As the campaign concludes, the hosts reflect on their epic journey, celebrating their success and the unique bonds formed through their shared adventures. Big Cat encapsulates the team's unity:

[136:15] PFT Commenter: "We are all together. That's all the important thing we wanted."

Notable Quotes Summary

• Big Cat on Teamwork:

  [01:10] "Really good teamwork on this."

• Max on Character Choice:

  [05:26] "I am Hippo Maximus... dressed as Shredder."

• Norm's Determination:

  [42:49] "I want to kill Poopy Stinks."

• Greg's Conflict:

  [27:23] "Do I have like some sort of like bracers on my hands, gloves?"

• Final Victory:

  [136:00] "Shredders always share the axe and turtles."

Final Thoughts

This episode masterfully combines the thrill of role-playing, strategic gameplay, and the hosts' signature humor, providing listeners with a satisfying conclusion to their beloved D&D saga. For fans who haven't joined the adventure yet, this episode offers a glimpse into the dynamic and entertaining world that "Pardon My Take" cultivates through its engaging content and charismatic hosts.

Transcript

[PFT Commenter]

Hey, pardon my take listeners. You can find every episode on Apple podcasts, Spotify or YouTube Prime. Members can listen ad free on Amazon.

[Big Cat]

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[PFT Commenter]

On today's part of my take it is Tim woods with us and we're going back into the realm. We're going to do some Dungeons and Dragons. We are on vacation.

[Big Cat]

Absolutely.

[PFT Commenter]

Absolutely. So Nick is here. We've got Max, Hank, Pft and myself and Tim woods bringing us on a great journey. One of the best ones. We've done.

[Big Cat]

Really good teamwork on this.

[PFT Commenter]

Really good teamwork. Really good teamwork. So very excited for everyone to listen. Again, we're on vacation. We'll be back on Monday with an episode with Rosillo. But this is our one once a year or twice a year. Dungeons and Dragons vacation. And it's Tim Woods. It's the best. So get excited to go into the land of Tim Woods. Land of Tim Woods. I can't remember what the name of the place is called.

[Big Cat]

Narnia.

[PFT Commenter]

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[Tim]

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[PFT Commenter]

Okay, let's go.

[Tim]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Welcome to part of my take presented by DraftKings. Take it to the rack with DraftKings Sportsbook. Every point counts. Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use Code Take. That's Code Take for new customers. Get 150 in bonus bets when you bet just five bucks only on DraftKings. The crown is yours. Today is Friday, February 14th. Happy Valentine's Day, boys.

[Big Cat]

Happy Valentine's Day.

[PFT Commenter]

I love you guys.

[Hank]

Love you guys.

[PFT Commenter]

I love you guys.

[Big Cat]

We don't say it enough.

[PFT Commenter]

We don't. So Valentine's Day special treatment. Tim Woods. We're going to be going off into the Dungeon Dragons world with Tim Woods, Nick, Max, myself, Pft and Hank.

[Big Cat]

Watch this on YouTube because the outfits that we rock, please.

[PFT Commenter]

And subscribe to the YouTube. Okay, let's. Let's kick it to ourselves with Tim Woods. We're brought to you by our friends at Chevy. Chevy has packed more capability into Silverado Trail Boss so you can pack more fun into your weekend. Have yourself a Friday, Saturday and Sunday with the truck that says no to nothing. Tailgates, spontaneous camping, tricks trips, DIY projects. Bring it on. What about a cross country road trip? Silverado was the perfect ride for last year's grit week out west. Recently they helped out giving fullbacks recognition they deserve with the low man award. And guess what? It's like a low man. It's like a fullback. 495 pounds of torque. Hold on to your sodas, Max. Silveradows bring the grit. Then pairs it with the latest truck tech, inside and out. The result, A truck that can do it all. Then show up on Monday with a story to tell. So learn more about the Silverado trail [e-mail] Chevrolet together, let's drive. Okay, here he is. Tim woods and Dungeons and Dragons. Okay, we are back. It is Dungeon and Dragons time. We have Tim woods here. We're very excited to get back into our mission. If you are listening this on the podcast, you can go watch the video because we have an incredible set. We're all dressed up. Let's go around the room. Just for our podcast listeners, we'll start with Max. Max, Nick, are both here. Max, why don't you say who you are and what you're dressed as?

[Max]

I am Hippo Maximus, the human druid, and I am dressed as Shredder from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle universe.

[Big Cat]

Yes.

[Max]

Yeah.

[Greg]

That's awesome. I am Greg G R E G, the human paladin, and I am dressed as Shredder from tmnt.

[Big Cat]

Oh, wow. I am Wayne the Hill dwarf bard. And today, imagine my surprise when I came up here and I'm also dressed as Shredder.

[Tim]

Oh, shit.

[PFT Commenter]

We got three Shredders.

[Big Cat]

That guy from Teenage Mutant Ninjas.

[PFT Commenter]

I'm Norm, the human barbarian. And we obviously didn't talk about this before because we should have planned better. I'm also Shredder.

[Greg]

Embarrassing at this point.

[Hank]

Yeah. And I'll complete the. Complete the five some. I'm Erlich the no more lock. And I am Leonardo from. I was excited to finish this mission together. This is the first time we made it two episodes. And, you know, we really bonded last time. And I was led astray before.

[Big Cat]

Well, what's gonna stop us from bonding today?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, we're gonna. Let's all stay together.

[Hank]

Well, maybe let's give some context for the Ninja Turtles. Maybe they don't know the. The lore.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. There's four Ninja Turtles. Four costumes for Ninja Turtles. I think someone was going to. I think Max was going to be April O'Neal, but accidentally, we all. We all ended up being Shredders. Who are Is the bad guy.

[Tim]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Nick actually texted me, like, a picture over the weekend, like, of an avatar. He's like, oh, I got my costume all set.

[Tim]

Yeah.

[Hank]

I was like, nice.

[PFT Commenter]

But listen, we're all going to stay together. I think the number one rule is all stay together. Number two rule is Shredders definitely stay.

[Hank]

Together till the end.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Tim]

Yeah.

[Max]

Number two rule might be number one.

[Tim]

Well, it's fluid situation where the priority goes.

[Big Cat]

If you've ever watched Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Shredder is in every episode. The Ninja Turtles are in, like, every episode. They never actually kill each other.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, they just fight. They fight. All right, so, Tim, welcome back.

[Tim]

Thanks for having me back. It's good to be back.

[PFT Commenter]

It's awesome.

[Hank]

Is that a horn?

[Tim]

I'm. This is my ranger garb. You can kind of think of a Ranger as I would say, like a medieval Shredder. A little bit.

[Max]

Of us.

[PFT Commenter]

Fuck, yes.

[Tim]

And as we pointed out, we did in our last session for the first time, both get to the end of the adventure for that day. And no one had gotten killed. So I don't know if that will hold up today or not. But I'm very excited.

[PFT Commenter]

There's just so many Shredders.

[Tim]

We did end things on a very exciting cliffhanger last time. We did decide that we would do the extended version of the Forge of Fury adventure where we completed level one. But now we are discovering there is more to the adventure. I don't expect anybody to remember anything from last time. It's been six months. I had to rewatch the episode. So I will give us some highlights of what happened last time. I first want to say that Norm the Barbarian, just a reminder, did go to the bar and chug the boot in record time. That was a big part of the beginning of last time. And won over the hearts and souls of all of the Dwarves in the town of Blasingdell by setting a new record on chugging. So big celebrity in town for sure.

[PFT Commenter]

Also, just for clarification, norm the Barbarian, aka Shredder4.

[Tim]

Shredder4. Working our way down. Absolutely.

[PFT Commenter]

You're keeping score at home?

[Tim]

Absolutely. Greg with two GS. The Paladin. I did want to remind you that you did get some good information and potions and stuff when you went to the local temple. You also did get a husband as well. You did put a wedding ring on the high priest.

[Greg]

That was completely accidental.

[Tim]

It was completely accidental. He accidentally. He's like, oops, we are married now. And he is now escorting you on your adventures.

[Greg]

Promise that won't. No. Like that will happen again.

[Tim]

Definitely not. And it's not only your. Your. The high priest who I'm naming. Horn Grim. Horn Grim. Your husband is with you as well as your moth. Don't forget you have a big moth that you ride on. And I never asked a very important question. That moth gets a name at some point so you can cook on that. Or if you happen. Do you have a suggestion?

[PFT Commenter]

I was gonna say maybe shredder.

[Max]

Shredder 5.

[PFT Commenter]

Shredder 5.

[Max]

Shrewder 5.

[Tim]

I would say Lil Shredder sounds fucking sick. Little Shredder. Why do I think Shredder had a Mini. Okay, never mind. Little Shredder is going to be your noted moth. 100%. I wanted to make sure we remembered that. Wayne, we did meet your family, most notably your stepsister, who was revealed to be, in fact, not your biological sister, but your stepsister. But only after she slept with the final boss of our last adventure, the ogre. Great Oath.

[Big Cat]

She got stuck in the window and then he had to get her out.

[Tim]

But said, that'll happen. That'll happen. I've seen a lot of footage of that.

[PFT Commenter]

Is that shredded?

[Tim]

That could certainly be Shreddet. Let me just make a quick adjustment here, Shreddette. What would I pick? That's so weird. That's so weird.

[Greg]

I would have been pissed if she was absolutely.

[Tim]

And so perfectly works out.

[PFT Commenter]

People are going to either hate it or love it.

[Tim]

We're all Shredders.

[Big Cat]

My parents would be so upset if I brought home a knot. Shredder.

[Tim]

Oh, my God. Yes.

[Greg]

My grandfather would be rolling over in his grave.

[Tim]

Won't share the same values that we have in their giant underground tank vehicle. And so we may run into your family again at some point. Wayne. In this adventure, Hippo Maximus. I wanted to remind you that you had acquired a valuable guide who helped lead us to the mountain. That was Big Don the Eagle, who, I am sorry to say, did unfortunately die in their first round of combat after they rolled a one and immediately got one shot by an orc. I also want to extend apology. I watched the footage. I feel like I was gloating a little bit and having too much fun with that. But it was an epic way for Big Don the Eagle to go down. And who knows, you might be able to acquire some new animal companions in your adventure today. And just a reminder, you still have the ability to shape shift into different animal forms. Your most important druid ability.

[Max]

Absolutely everybody.

[Tim]

And of course, Erlik, lest we forget, it was you who delivered the final fireball that killed off the remaining orcs that we were fighting and revealed that the key had been picked up by, like, the old orc chieftain who had not wanted to give it to the big dumb ogre who is currently sleeping with the stepsister. And you had caught, thanks to some inspiration from Wayne the Key. We went over, we opened up the vault that held the valuable magic weapons and gold, including the mighty axe of the dwarven blacksmith Durgeddon, only to find the vault was completely empty. Instead, what we found was the empty vault and a secret door that had been dug up into the vault with a staircase that goes downward to level two of the Forge of Fury. And whoever dug that tunnel clearly has taken the treasure we came here for to lay claim to. Just a reminder. Also, everyone here is looking for the axe, but for very, very different reasons. Some of us can wield it, some of us want to destroy the axe in order to harvest its power. But we have not yet decided who's going to get the axe at the end of the day. So that's what we're looking for. We know there's a staircase leading down deeper into the dungeon where these thieves. Not that it was our axe really, but they took it first. That we need to reclaim the treasure from.

[PFT Commenter]

That's our end goal.

[Hank]

Not related to any of that. If someone were to acquire this ax, is it like an immunity axe? Like you kind of can't die if you have it?

[Tim]

It's not really an immunity axe, though it does give you immense power for defeating people who might try to take the axe from you. I established that both the paladin barbarian can wield the axe. Our dwarven bard, also being a dwarf, can wield the axe. Whereas you are maybe looking to take the axe, destroy it, harvest its power, and gain the power of a hundred souls, which would be very helpful for defeating anyone who is trying to kill you. Like, I don't know, a shredder or something like that.

[Big Cat]

If any of us find the ax, we share it amongst all our souls. All the shredders.

[Hank]

We're like pizza. Like a piece of pizza.

[Tim]

100% max. I feel like your druid circle wants to get this axe.

[Greg]

We're trying to get the axe, but surely it'll be be very, very dangerous to get there.

[Tim]

Oh, I would say that we don't know exactly who took this axe, but they clearly brought it deeper into the dungeon where things get a lot more dangerous for certain. And speaking of danger, I will also say that when we notice that the sound has died down from the ogre's bedroom, and we kind of might even check in to see what's going on in there, the ogre and your stepsister are completely missing. We do not see them anywhere. It's as though someone has maybe kidnapped your stepsister. Perhaps it is unclear what has happened to them, and you notice a blood stain, you look under the bed, the ogre's dead. Someone cut the ogre's throat, and there are signs that you're. There was some sort of a struggle here. Your sister appears to be missing, so.

[PFT Commenter]

So someone cut the ogre's throw yes. Does anyone here have a sword?

[Greg]

I don't seem to.

[Hank]

This sounds like Gone girl.

[Big Cat]

I've got a crossbow.

[PFT Commenter]

No, no, I'm saying, like, physically.

[Big Cat]

Oh, are you holding? I was.

[Hank]

I was getting the key.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, you have a sword.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Where were you getting the key from?

[Hank]

I was. I. I gotta. I got an alibi.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Hank]

I was up. I was up in the vault.

[PFT Commenter]

Why is there blood on your sword?

[Tim]

Ooh.

[Hank]

There's no.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Tim]

I will also say that as we're kind of pondering the staircase downward, deeper into the dungeon, there is another character showing up. We had left a few orcs alive. There had been a shaman, a blood shaman, who was no longer a threat or anything. But one orc opens up the door to where all the dead orcs in the barracks are that you had cooked with your fireball. And this individual immediately starts talking really loudly. They seem like a particularly weak and flimsy orc that we could defeat easily. But he starts loudly saying, oh, what smells in here? Here. There's some kind of hamburgers. And he smells the bodies. No, not them. And he starts walking over to us. This orc just popped out of nowhere. And he starts sniffing us. It's not hamburgers I smell. And he starts to smell Norm in particular. At this point, anybody can attack this guy, but he's acting like we're not going to do anything to him. And as he sniffs, he says, it's not hamburgers at all. I'm smelling sliders. My name's Poopy Stinks.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, no.

[Tim]

But I'm also patrol. And see, I can just smell sliders from pretty far away. I can smell the gods are favoring you. All right, now you're using sliders right now. The gods are making things pretty easy for you, I can tell. Watch. The shaman taught me some blood magic. He takes a little needle and kind of like hits his palm, drips a drop of blood onto the wall. And all of a sudden, his blood starts to move around, riding on the wall. And it says in clear, common tongue, player strength high. And then underneath it, the word forms monster strength low. And he points and says, you guys are using sliders right now. All the other people doing this adventure have been playing it hard mode. Do you want to play it hard or easy mode?

[Big Cat]

Is the audience gonna know if we choose to play it easy mode?

[PFT Commenter]

If we do it before we start the stream? They won't.

[Tim]

Okay, so we don't like sliders in theory. We like sliders.

[PFT Commenter]

We love sliders. We just like to Change them before people can see.

[Big Cat]

We just don't want people to know that we're doing sliders. Yeah, I want to play hard mode road. You gotta play hard teams.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, yeah.

[Big Cat]

You gotta play hard teams to win.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Tim]

You touch where it says enemy difficulty easy. And immediately it's the slider starts to move over and now it is set to hard.

[Big Cat]

Can we all act surprised that we didn't know it was on low?

[Tim]

Absolutely. 100. Absolutely. Yes.

[PFT Commenter]

To be the man, you gotta beat the man.

[Tim]

Absolutely. And you feel like the mountain shudder just a little bit. And he says, all right, now you're playing without sliders. Well done, well done. I want to watch. And Poopy Stinks is going to be false. Following us, it seems deeper into the mountain and maybe occasionally like insulting our performance or something like that. But at this point, to see what order we are going to be going in today, I'm going to ask everybody to roll their D20, the 20 sided die. And I'm going to be adding your dexterity bonuses to see what order our characters are going to go in.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[PFT Commenter]

Nice.

[Tim]

17, 19. Erlich, you have a plus two on this. So that's a 19 total for Erlich.

[PFT Commenter]

Two.

[Tim]

Two. Okay.

[PFT Commenter]

We're on the same team, bro.

[Tim]

You don't have advantage on this yet. So unfortunately, two plus one is just gonna be a three for Norm.

[Big Cat]

I got a 15.

[Tim]

15. And you have a plus three on this, I believe, actually. And so you said 16.

[Big Cat]

15.

[Tim]

15. So that is now an 18 for Wayne. Excellent. 17, 17. And you have a plus zero on this, I believe. So with a 17, you'll be going right after Wayne. And that is Greg And Hippo Maximus. 10. 10 for Hippo Maximus. That's a plus one. So you got an 11 total. Hippo Maximus. So Erlich, you are actually gonna be going first today.

[Big Cat]

Our leader just walk out in front of us, sir.

[Tim]

We'll be leader of the turtles.

[PFT Commenter]

100.

[Greg]

All right, Hank, your last turn. Make it count.

[Tim]

Absolutely. There is a staircase leading down deeper into the mountain. And you can even make out dusty footprints that seem to indicate the thieves did go up and down these stairs. There's also an annoying orc SL troll named Poopy stinks around, and that's about all we're dealing with so far. What would you like to do?

[Hank]

Can I disguise myself?

[Tim]

You certainly could. In fact, when we last saw you on our last adventure, you had been disguised as the orc archer who fell off the cliff when Wayne had been tantalizing him along with A mixture of money and his stepsister as bait. So you have definitely already been an orc disguise. You can use another spell slot to switch to another disguise.

[Hank]

I'd like to do that.

[Tim]

What do you want to change into?

[Hank]

Let's go with shredder.

[Tim]

Absolutely 100%. A shredder suddenly appears where you had been standing. Erlik. Its Shredder looks massive and scared. You're a gnome, so this is sort of like you're inside of a big tent. It's like, moving around with you. But this illusion is much bigger than you, and so you now look like Shredder. 100%. Big, scary ninja lord.

[Hank]

Awesome time.

[Tim]

Absolutely 100%. Hank.

[Big Cat]

Don't use the hard R if you're gonna say Shredder word.

[Tim]

Actually, you certainly used your action to cast disguise. I would even say maybe that's your bonus action. Was there anything else you want to do on your turn? Currently, we are just all Shredders. No one can. I used to always tell who is what. Shredder, as it were.

[PFT Commenter]

Five Shredders who could have seen us here. Incredible.

[Tim]

You could certainly look down the stairs, try to scout around, see what you can see. You could head down the stairs either sneakily or in an obvious way and check out what's going on down there. Or you could.

[Hank]

Could I do a burning hands launch a cone of fire ahead of me?

[Tim]

You certainly could. However, the burning hands only goes about 15ft, and when you look down the stairs, you don't see anybody within 15ft, though. There could be somebody who's invisible or something like that. It's totally up to you.

[Hank]

All right, so I'll just do some. I'll just scout that.

[Tim]

Absolutely. That would be a perception check. You want to roll a D20 plus your perception skill bonus. If you have a perception skill bonus, I don't think you do. So your wisdom modifier would just be a plus one here.

[Hank]

19.

[Tim]

19 plus one is a dirty 20, we would say. And so with the dirty 20, you are immediately noticing what is at the bottom of the. These stairs. They go about 20ft down, and they open into an octagonal room. The stairs are heading down to the north. And then once you get to the bottom of the stairs, you can tell that straight ahead against the northern wall is a big dwarven statue holding two axes up in the air. He's kind of armored in a sort of way that looks a little bit like a ninja lord, like maybe like a Shredder, possibly. And then on the eastern side is another dwarven Statue with a big axe on the western side, a third dwarven statue with a big axe. In between each statue, there is a pair of doors. So double doors on the northwest and double doors on the northeast. Two sets of double doors with three statues interspersed between them. However, with a 20, you can tell one important detail. These doors are sealed and trapped in such a way that, you know, the statues have hinges on their, like, elbow or elbows and like shoulders. These axes will come down upon you if you try to open these doors. So you know that before you even head down the stairs, these are two sets of trapped doors. Right. Now, did you want to go try anything down there or no?

[Hank]

I. I think I'd like to keep that to myself. And maybe one of them will try and open one of the doors.

[Tim]

Thank you for letting me know that. So none of us know information. I just said and Erlich, great turn. Wayne, that is now your turn. What would you like to do?

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Big Cat]

These. I'm not allowed to know about the statues, right?

[Tim]

You don't know about the statues yet. He hasn't said anything to you?

[Big Cat]

Okay. But I'm thinking that if we go down these steps, I'm interested to know what's in that room because it might be like, where we can find the ax.

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[Big Cat]

You like that? So I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go down these steps.

[Tim]

100. Go ahead and roll. Well, you don't have to roll anything to go down the steps. You get down the steps, you can immediately see three dwarven statues. You can see the doors. Just don't know anything else about them.

[Big Cat]

Got it.

[Tim]

Would you like to examine them or.

[Big Cat]

I would like to. I. I get the feeling like one of these statues might have an arm or maybe the head tips back and it opens up one of the doors. Like an old school, like, trap door, maybe speakeasy on the other side.

[Tim]

Absolutely. When?

[PFT Commenter]

Dude, perfect. Candy room.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah. Can I go up to. To all the statues and just like, move their heads around?

[Tim]

100. Roll me a D20. Plus your investigation skill. Do you have the investigation skill under skills?

[Big Cat]

Use a skill. I have perception.

[Tim]

Perception is what you can use. Then in that case, that's going to be better than whatever your investigation would have been.

[Big Cat]

But I also have sleight of hand. Can I use my hands?

[Tim]

I'd allow that. 100. Yes, definitely.

[Big Cat]

All right. 7.

[Tim]

7 plus 5. 5 with a 12. You are trying to wiggle these statues. It's not working now, though. There's something about the arms that might move I would let you try again if you want, but then if you don't succeed, you might be risking stuff. Like you could try to really push these statues and take a risk on it.

[Greg]

I don't think anything bad can happen.

[Big Cat]

No.

[Tim]

Holy.

[Big Cat]

Okay, yeah, I'll try again.

[Tim]

Absolutely. Try one more time. Roll again.

[Big Cat]

18.

[Tim]

18 plus 5. Here's the thing. At the very last minute, as you're really trying to push the arm, and all of a sudden it starts to shift. You're like, wait, wait, it's gonna drop the ax on me. You don't do that, and instead you get to the top of the statue. And I like what you said about the head. So I'm gonna say the trigger for this secret door that you just discovered was shifting the head. As soon as you tilt the head, the eastern wall behind the eastern statue starts to slide open. It was a secret door, but not to a speakeasy. It seems like there's another staircase now going down to the east that opens up into a big dwarven hall. Kind of think Moria, where the pillars seem to be disappearing into the distance. You can tell that there is a big room down these stairs. And you did not set off any traps. Congratulations.

[PFT Commenter]

Nice.

[Tim]

Now, that was your action. As a bonus action, would you like to inspire any of your teammates?

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I'd love to inspire my teammates. So who's up next?

[Tim]

In theory, it would be Gretchen. Greg.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I'll inspire Greg.

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[Big Cat]

Talk Greg up. Gas up the boy.

[Tim]

Absolutely. What do you say to gas him up?

[Big Cat]

I just say I scream down the hall, my boy over there thinks you're cute. And I point at Greg.

[Tim]

You shout that down the stairs. Is that right? Okay. 100. You kind of shout that. And Greg, you know, whoever's down there, they're going to think that you're probably cute. And so, Greg, that's gonna bring. You do not notice that your husband, the high priest horn. Grim. I'm gonna roll to see how upset he is. The higher I roll, the more he heard that.

[PFT Commenter]

You don't want to be upset, though.

[Big Cat]

Make him a little jealous.

[Tim]

He seems like he's. He puts like the little like the horn up to his ear to try to hear what's going on. He didn't hear that at all. He never listened. He also healed all of us for our wounds. He's a healer. He can.

[Greg]

So we're all good?

[Tim]

We're all at full hit points.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Tim]

He laid his hands upon him.

[Hank]

Sunset situation.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. You have the best touching husband.

[Greg]

I want a gay divorce.

[Tim]

100%. Absolutely. He. I do feel like he is agreeing that like your whole marriage ceremony was accidental but entirely legally binding. So he's like. It's unfortunately a multi month process to go through dwarven divorce court, so it's going to take a while, but we can, we can get the process started. And he kind of looks down a little sad if you, if that's what you want.

[Greg]

Do I have like some sort of like bracers on my hands, gloves?

[Tim]

Yeah, I would say so. Probably on him. Yeah.

[Greg]

I want to kill my partner.

[Tim]

Oh my gosh. You absolutely can if you want to do that. He is looking rather sad and heartbroken. And you have a sword that you could slay him with right now. You also have a lance you could.

[Greg]

I want to lance. Lance bastard.

[Tim]

Absolutely. 100%. Like. So you told him you wanted divorce.

[Greg]

Lance and my husband.

[Tim]

Yeah, he's pretty upset about it. Do you get on your mark moth to charge him with the lance?

[Greg]

I feel like, I feel like that's only right.

[Tim]

Absolutely. Do you, do you let him see it coming? No. Or do you just. You're giving him a mercy killing from behind. Roll a total of three times. You get one advantage because you're on your moth's back. You get another advantage because you're surprising him. And I'll be honest, he doesn't see it coming. So roll a D 23 times and take the highest result.

[Hank]

Did you pick a name for the moth yet, Nick?

[Greg]

It is a Little Shredder.

[Tim]

The little shredder.

[PFT Commenter]

Eight.

[Tim]

Eight so far. Unfortunately, that might not be enough.

[Greg]

20.

[Tim]

20. You can stop rolling. No, better than that. So I don't even need a dice roll for this. Even without smiting him. That is an insta kill on high Priest Horn. Grimm, your form. You are now a widower. 100%. Absolutely. And that whittles down our list of NPCs pretty nicely. Love it. Excellent. You've still got little Shredder the Moth. And lest I forget, I also want to remind Norm the Barbarian. And you have Magnus Steeltoe, a dwarf who came from the bar to hang out with you. He hasn't really. He escorted us to the mountain and now he's just having a good time drinking. And I also just want to remind you because you may need to know, remember this, Erlich, you do have an imp. Last time I forgot about your imp. Lola. Lola may be the difference between life and death for you today. So just a reminder. But Greg, your husband is now dead. What would you like to do with the rest of your journey?

[Greg]

Can I investigate the corpse that was left under the bed?

[Tim]

Oh yes, you certainly could. Please roll for me either an insight skill check or perception, whichever skill you have. Do you have either of those?

[Greg]

I have neither.

[Tim]

Okay, then you would have a plus one from Wisdom for investigating the crime scene here as.

[Greg]

Okay, so do I need to roll anything?

[Tim]

Just roll a D20 and you're adding plus one because you don't have either of those skills. Just wisdom.

[Greg]

13 plus one.

[Tim]

13 plus one is a 14. You're going to get one clue about this crime scene. What is the thing you want to know the most here?

[Greg]

What direction the killer escaped from?

[Tim]

Oh, interesting. You are now noticing that somehow maybe while we were arresting and getting healed by your ex hus your late husband, you are noticing someone must have snuck out of the room and gone down the very stairs that we are now going down. So they're down here ahead of us. Whoever killed Great Oak Wolf and took the stepsister. Really good stuff. Well good. Well done, Greg.

[PFT Commenter]

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[Tim]

That is going to bring us to Hippo Max next.

[Max]

I'm also sorry for your loss.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, tragic.

[Greg]

Thank you.

[Max]

So I'm going to want to check.

[Tim]

Down those steps 100%. You can. We've revealed the secret door that was the big test in the first room. And now you can see down the stairs. It opens up into some multi pillar big dwarven hall. But from the top of the series we can't see the whole room room. So you could go down the stairs. You can make a perception check from the top of the stairs. You can do whatever you want.

[Max]

I want to go right down those stairs.

[Tim]

Are you going in human form or turning into an animal first? You might want to see what's down there before you turn into an animal.

[Max]

Yeah, I would like. I would like to stay in human form for now.

[Tim]

That makes complete sense. So you start to go down the stairs.

[Max]

If I had to choose a little.

[Big Cat]

Early in the day and start anamorphing.

[Tim]

Now, I'll say that, I mean if.

[Max]

You morph into something else already, how can you be trusted, right?

[Big Cat]

Especially if you're not even known yet.

[Max]

Max doesn't try to fit in with like the rest of the crowd.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, that's true.

[Tim]

Yeah, that's true. Now this is an area where, because we picked a different difficulty, the AWOs who have played this adventure would be expecting you to see something. When you get down to the bottom of the stairs, you see a dwarven hall with six pillars. There's a bunch of dwarves leading out of here. To the left there's two doors on the northern wall. To the right there's two doors on the southern wall. And then straight ahead on the eastern wall is a throne. A big dwarven throne with a door behind that. Five different doors to pick from. And there's a bunch of beds in the Middle of the floor, sleeping bags around a campfire. Like somebody has been hunkering down in here and using this as like a base of operations, kind of. But you don't see anybody in this room, though. When you listen, you think you hear someone, but you don't see see them. What would you like to do?

[Max]

Is there anything. Is there anything that I could roll to try and get more wisdom of.

[Tim]

Where they can be? Absolutely. That would be a perception check. Do you have the perception skill, by any chance?

[Max]

I do not have the perception.

[Tim]

Then you would have a plus three from your wisdom because you are a very wise character as a druid.

[Max]

So I'm rolling a D20.

[Tim]

D20 plus three. Okay.

[Max]

That would be a 16.

[Tim]

16 plus three is a 19. Here's the first thing I'm going to tell you. You understand what's going on here? There are people in the room with you. They are using magical invisibility. You think I'm gonna ask for you to roll a knowledge check for me. You also know there are at least two, maybe three, maybe more individuals in this room giving very foot clan vibes. I would say very sneaky, very invisible.

[Max]

Seems like a Harry Potter situation.

[Tim]

Abso. Your very much roll me a D20 plus your nature skill. If you can roll really well on this, you might have a clue as to who or what these people might be.

[PFT Commenter]

4.

[Tim]

Unfortunately, all you know for sure is you think you hear the clanking of armor. Like, whoever they are, they're not terribly sneaky, but they are invisible. You can hear them in heavy armor, though, slowly trying to maneuver, like they might be trying to surround you. You right now. You still have your action to either cast a spell or do an attack. The problem is you don't see anybody right now.

[Max]

Could I could. Could I now? Could I now shape into something else?

[Tim]

You certainly could. Yes. That'll be the final thing you get to do. But you can turn into an animal if you want. And I put some sample animals down there, but really can turn into whatever animal you want.

[Greg]

You got to defend yourself. Something with, like, a shell.

[Max]

If I could.

[Big Cat]

With night vision.

[Max]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Like an owl.

[Max]

Is there. Like, could I be like a snapping turtle?

[Tim]

You could be, yes. 108. You could turn into a giant snapping turtle that would be the size of a human, if not a little bit bigger, with a big spiky shell and a pretty powerful bite attack, I would say as well.

[Max]

All right.

[Tim]

Snapping turtles. You turn into a big turtle, you're, like looking around like, where are they? Where are they. And you even hear somebody, like, whisper like, oh, under their breath as they see you change into this terrifying animal. Gonna put snapping turtle down here. So I remember best of all, if you take any damage in this form, you lose the turtle hit points. But if you get knocked out of turtle form, if you go down to zero hit points in turtle form, you just turn right back into a human dream.

[Max]

Back to shredder.

[Tim]

Back into shredder 100, my true self.

[Big Cat]

However, Max is making me very angry right now, looking at him.

[Tim]

Yeah, yeah.

[Max]

No, it's okay.

[Big Cat]

Something about how you look. Look, this makes me want to kill you.

[Max]

There's something about snapping turtles.

[Tim]

Yeah, absolutely. Now, at this point, actually, no, not yet. Something else is going to happen first. Magnus steel toe, your good dwarven friend is by our side right now. Would you like to send him down or would you like to hold him back or have him do something else? He's ready to start heading down the stairs.

[PFT Commenter]

I'm with all the guys right now.

[Tim]

You are?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Tim]

Send him down, Absolutely. He goes rushing down, and it is right after he comes rushing down that all of a sudden, from behind one of the pillars, a crossbow bolt comes flying out right at Magnus. I am going to say this is an attack against him. It actually just barely misses Magnus. Luckily, Magnus come back. Absolutely. And we see whoever fired that. That is now visible. We see what looks like a giant sized dwarf of some kind with gray skin and white hair who disappears behind the pillar, but only because he's hiding behind it now. You know, he was invisible. He is no longer invisible, actually, because he was invisible. I need to roll a second time to see if he hits Magnus. No, he still doesn't hit Magnus. Luckily, then suddenly, behind you, an axe comes down upon your shell again with advantage because he's invisible. And you see that? Nope, just barely a miss against you because you have a turtle shell. It is just barely deflecting off your shell. A big dwarf in armor again, gray skin, white hair, and he tries to retreat away from you. The moment he does, you get a free attack against him. Hippo Maximus, you can roll me a D20 plus five. Come on, man, you can snap at this.

[Max]

There's something about turtles that are just such a point of attack here.

[Tim]

1212 plus your snapping turtle form would have a plus five. That is just barely a hit against this guy. Well done. You need a 16 or higher. So roll two. D6, the cube shaped die. Add them up and add plus four.

[Max]

Okay.

[Tim]

And this will be the guy with the axe.

[Max]

A five.

[Tim]

You.

[Max]

And then the next one will be a four.

[Tim]

A four and a five is nine plus another four is going to be 13. You can tell this guy with the axe continues retreating. He's not quite halfway dead yet. And this guy looks pretty tough. Anyone who's looking at these two gray skinned dwarves can immediately roll a D20. If you roll well enough, you might know who it is. Is we are fighting right now.

[PFT Commenter]

Go ahead.

[Hank]

I roll.

[Big Cat]

Are we all looking?

[Tim]

Everybody can. 100%. Everybody who's down there right now. Which I would say at this point is everybody.

[Hank]

I got a four.

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[PFT Commenter]

I got a two.

[Tim]

Again.

[Greg]

I roll a one. Boys.

[Big Cat]

I got a three.

[Tim]

Three. Wow. Absolutely. And Max.

[Max]

I'm also going.

[Tim]

You also can try. The problem is you can't communicate cuz you're in turtle form. Turtle rose.

[Max]

That's a problem. That would be a six.

[Tim]

Six is not enough.

[Hank]

Still combined all of our numbers.

[Tim]

You wanted us to roll a D20.

[Max]

Oh, I was rolling a D. No, sorry.

[Tim]

Not the D6. You want to come on. That would be the great roll. Then on the D6. I'm gonna roll one D20 to see if you're. And you add a plus two for your nature skill as well.

[Max]

Seven.

[Tim]

Seven. I'm sorry to say no one knows. These seem like they are evil dwarves. They have gray skin, white hair and their eyes are really creepy. No pupils or irises. Pure white. And as they are fighting us, they look like they are vicious and much larger than a dwarf should be at this point. Norm, if you could just roll for Magnus as well. Since he's not dead. He might know what's going on here.

[PFT Commenter]

Two. Again.

[Tim]

Two again. He has advantage on this because he's a dwarf.

[PFT Commenter]

Of course he does.

[Tim]

You can roll a second time as well because you're also a 12. 12. He might know something about this.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Tim]

And then Wayne, let's see if you also know that's a leaner le. Yeah. Cocked. Die. Absolutely. Roll again. 100%.

[Big Cat]

Is that. Is that what I think it is?

[Tim]

I don't.

[Big Cat]

Or is that cocked again? I think I double. I double cocked.

[Tim]

Okay, fair enough. Fair enough.

[Big Cat]

That's a four.

[Tim]

No. Okay, so I'll say it was almost get the name from Magnus Steeltoe. I'll just say Horngrim might have known the exact answer to this automatically. But he knows that there are different types of dwarves. There are mountain dwarves, there are hill dwarves and then there are what is known as the deep dwarves. The Duer. They are evil dwarves who instead of delving down into the earth, Come up from the deepest levels of the underdark and make war upon their surface brethren. The good dwarves who live on the surface. The Dar must have come creeping up from below, burrowed their way into the vault. And it is very likely that they are the ones who have stolen the treasure that we are looking for. DAR would love to get their hands on things like axes and magic weapons created by their surface brethren. And so we know we are fighting some evil dwarves who have the ability to magically enlarge themselves and turn invisible. And so that was Magnus Steeltoe and then the Dweigar on their turn. Horn Grimm is out of initiative. So Poopy Stinks. The orc starts going, oh, you guys, you gotta start killing them. Do better. Do better. And Norm, we are up to you now. What would you like to do?

[PFT Commenter]

You know, mean Tim norm the Barbarian, aka Shredder4. I got blood lust.

[Tim]

I want to kill 100%.

[Hank]

Think what I'm thinking.

[Big Cat]

Who do you want to kill?

[PFT Commenter]

I want to kill Poopy Sticks. And we got to make this. We got to go back to easy.

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[PFT Commenter]

We'll go sliders. Back to easy.

[Tim]

Absolutely. Yes. 100%. You immediately ready your ax. You go. Yeah. Get them. Get them. And before he even realizes what you're doing, you're already pivoting, riveting in midair and going to hack into Poopy Stinks. Go ahead. And you already have advantage. You get to roll the D 22 times because you're surprising him. But let me ask, are you also going reckless?

[PFT Commenter]

I'm going reckless.

[Tim]

Then you can roll three times on this attack.

[PFT Commenter]

14.

[Tim]

14. Absolutely.

[PFT Commenter]

16.

[Tim]

16 is great. 100%.

[Big Cat]

15.

[Tim]

15. So with the 16 and I think you have a plus like seven on your attack. That's a 23. And PO goes. No, my. My armor is higher too, because you set the difficulty to ah. And it's still enough to hit him. Well done. You are hitting him. But I know how many hit points he has currently. Go ahead and roll 2d6 plus 6 damage. Assuming, of course, you are raging right now. That is the D6. Bingo. You want to roll that two times and add six to the total one. That's bad. That's not great. Seven damage so far.

[Hank]

Four.

[PFT Commenter]

Four.

[Tim]

Four. That's 11 damage total. And at this difficulty, Poopy Stinks had 10 HP. He is just barely slain with your first attack. Well done. And immediately. I will let you touch the blood stain and move back to easy, boys.

[PFT Commenter]

We don't have poopy things get up our ass anymore.

[Tim]

You can now tell the the duer with the axe is halfway dead now, everybody. Congratulations. His hit point bar just went down. Well done. Done.

[PFT Commenter]

Suck my dick, goofy.

[Tim]

St. Absolutely. And. And nothing more satisfying than getting to kill people that we can't normally kill over the Internet. And so, Norm, that was only your first attack. You still have one more attack. Who would you like to deliver it to? There's one Dagar who is now, thanks to you, halfway dead.

[PFT Commenter]

All right, we got to. I got to kill the dart. Right.

[Tim]

You can also see a full strength DAR pointing a crossbow at us. So you can go after either one. You'll easily probably be able to kill the one.

[PFT Commenter]

Let's take the crossbow guy cuz then you guys can clean up cuz the other. There's one dwar full strength crossbow. One dar half strength.

[Tim]

Correct.

[PFT Commenter]

Let's go for the full strength.

[Greg]

He's ready to shoot.

[Big Cat]

Which one is.

[Tim]

He's not ready to shoot yet, but he's going to on his next turn. Currently the one with the crossbow, I like hostage.

[Big Cat]

Can we get the.

[PFT Commenter]

The half half guy?

[Tim]

You could take him.

[Greg]

Kill the crossbow guy first.

[Hank]

Yeah. And then take the weak one.

[Greg]

Kill the weak one and then convince the other guy be like, look, we'll do that to you.

[PFT Commenter]

Kill the strong one, convince the weak one.

[Greg]

Okay.

[Tim]

If you kill their allies, it usually makes them easier to surrender. And like Pokemon, they're easier to catch if they're a little.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay, okay. So let's kill the strong one.

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[PFT Commenter]

Before I do that though, can I just. I got a friend who's in. He's had a tough go of it. Can I just lightly kiss Greg on the lip?

[Tim]

You certainly can. As you run down his gay husband 100, you'll be running right by him to get to the DWE guard. So just a quick boat, I'll say as part of your raging bonus action.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Greg]

What do I roll if I get hard?

[Tim]

Roll me a D20 if you get a 24 4. No. You're pretty soft, actually.

[PFT Commenter]

This usually doesn't happen to you.

[Tim]

It'll happen. Yes.

[Greg]

Husband just died.

[Tim]

You can tell me if you feel like you should be rolling a second time. Like if there's double the chance you might have advantage on this, as it were, and you won't roll again. That's up to you to decide. Yeah. If you think your character would like it, then you have to roll again. I'm sorry to say.

[Max]

Just give you like 10 minutes.

[Tim]

It always Works not as soft as you were before, but it's like half chub, maybe like 10 different clothes. It's a good kiss though. Solid kiss. And you can run to the crossbow Dwigar at the other side of the room. Norm. The moment you do, suddenly as you are crossing the distance to get into melee with him, another invisible Dwigar tries to plant a pair of axes into your back as you run past the pillar that he was hiding behind.

[Hank]

I'm sorry, only had a hard shell on your back.

[Tim]

Going to hit you with the first one. And actually he gets another roll because you're going reckless right now. No. Okay. Didn't crit. But he hits you with the first one and then the second one is going to be another hit. I am sorry to say. That's two separate hits with two separate hand axes. And he is going to get for the first hand axe a total of. Looks like it's going to be five plus three. Eight damage.

[PFT Commenter]

I can handle that.

[Tim]

You're raging. You don't take eight damage. You take four damage from the first attack. The second attack would have been 11. Gets half down to five. So you took nine damage in all. You still have 50 HP left out of your 59. Right now you're fine, but partially because of the slider. And so you are absolutely able to either turn back on this guy and attack him or go for the full strength guy with the crossbow. But now you know there's two Dar with full strength, not just one.

[PFT Commenter]

Turn back on the guy. Guy. I mean, he just hit me.

[Big Cat]

Gotta defend yourself.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Otherwise they're all gonna think you're a. Yeah, yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

All right. I'm. I'm gonna turn around and this guy up.

[Tim]

Absolutely. Go ahead and roll with your reckless attack two times and take the higher number 17. 17 is a hit already, but let's see if you crit 19. I mean, even better. You are definitely hitting him for 2d6 plus 6 damage with your great sword. 4. 4, 2, 2. So 6 plus 6 is 12 damage on the duer with his double hand axes. He's very much like a Duer ranger, you think, with double hand axes and like his cloak thrown up like he's an extra sneaky Dwigar. So he actually has a little less hit points than the others. 12. He's halfway dead for him. Well done.

[PFT Commenter]

Two half dead draegars.

[Tim]

Exactly right. 100% well done. On your turn, Norm. That's both of the attacks that you get. And then Erlich, that is going to bring us Back around to the top of initiative with you. At some point the duar are going to go. We actually got a lot of us in a row before they get a chance to.

[Hank]

And do I get. Does Lola get to attack as well?

[Tim]

Yes, thank you for remembering that 100%. Lola absolutely gets to attack. Lola also is the other person here who definitely has the invisibility ability spell. So she, I'm going to assume is invisible right now at the beginning of combat. And so she'll have advantage on stinging anybody that she can see. But unfortunately being invisible does not mean you can see other invisible people.

[Hank]

I also. It says here it can shape shift. I would like to. It can shape shift into a raven spider. Rat. I think about the rat.

[Tim]

She's in rat form right now. Then she could be invisible in rat form either way. Yeah, totally.

[Greg]

Are you master?

[Tim]

Are you master?

[Greg]

I hate.

[PFT Commenter]

I hate Master Splinter.

[Tim]

Yes, absolutely.

[PFT Commenter]

You don't know who master Splinter is. Yeah, I do. Oh, do.

[Hank]

What am I doing?

[Tim]

So if you're going to have her go attack, who do you want her to to attack? The guy with the hand axes, the guy with the big axe or the guy with the crossbow?

[Hank]

Crossbow.

[Tim]

Absolutely. 100%. You're going for the full guy, full strength with the crossbow. Roll me. Since she's invisible in rat form, roll me with advantage a D 22 times and take the higher number.

[Hank]

That'll be one O.

[Tim]

Okay. Good thing she's invisible. 18. 18, 18. There you go. She has a plus five to hit. So with a 23 you are hitting the guy with the crossbow. Four one D four plus three damage with a stinger. A scorpion stinger. That I'm gonna say. He's coming out of the rat tail for sure. So It'd be the D4. It is the pyramid shaped die. You're looking for the number on top.

[Hank]

One.

[Tim]

Ooh. I'm sorry to say with a plus three, that's four damage against him so far. But then the poison kicks in. I would like you to please roll for me. 3D sixes in all and add them up. That's a lot of poison damage.

[Hank]

That's 3.

[Tim]

3, 6.

[Hank]

3.

[Tim]

Okay, 4. Okay. So 10 damage. Unfortunately, Dwigar being dwarves, dwarves in our group would know they have advantage on saving throws against the poison. So they're going to try to shake it off. Off first is not a success. But let's try the second roll. That is enough to succeed. They're taking half that damage. So five and then dar are dwarves who take half damage from Poison also. So it drops down to just two damage instead, I am sorry to say. So that duar with the crossbow took six points of damage. They're not halfway dead just yet. But that was only Lola's turn. Lola is now visible, and you can tell that this guy's reaching for a half hammer on his back to try to hit Lola and dropping his crossbow. Do you want to do anything to him?

[Hank]

Yeah, I'd like to. Eldritch blast.

[Tim]

Absolutely. Eldritch blast is a huge move for you. That's two attacks. Do you want to aim them both at this guy with the crossbow? Yeah.

[Hank]

I can't let him take out Lola.

[Tim]

So you roll me one. D20 plus six, I believe. Eight. Eight plus six. I'm sorry to say he's not a hit against this guy. Just barely. A miss by two points. Points. Now, to be fair, you have an ability that could save you here. You have something called Dark One's blessing. You get to add a D10 to one roll. But once you do it, you. Oh, you're. It's used up for the whole day. All right. Only get it once per game.

[Hank]

I'll save it.

[Tim]

You save it, you get another blast. Roll that other blast now. D20 plus 6.

[Hank]

Come on. 18.

[Tim]

18 plus 6 is a solid hit. Go ahead and roll for the damage. One D10. That's this weird shaped one right here. D10 plus three. Bingo.

[PFT Commenter]

Two.

[Tim]

Two plus three is five more damage brings the one with the Crossbow up to 11 damage. That is just a few points shy of being halfway dead for the one with the crossbow. But so far, so good. You piled up some damage on that one. DWe go far. Well done. And erlich, anything else you wanted to do on your turn. Commanding Lola was the bonus action. Your action. You could move a little bit and open up a door if you wanted to, but I don't know if now is the right time for that.

[Hank]

Yeah, I think.

[Tim]

I think we're good. Absolutely. 100.

[PFT Commenter]

Another quick break from our dungeon and dragons action to talk to you about Reese's. Reese's Peanut Butter cups are the perfect combo of chocolate and peanut butter. Reese's Peanut Butter Cups maybe even more perfect with a layer of ooey gooey delicious chocolate lava. You can buy Reese's Cups basically anywhere. It's lava time, baby. Try Reese's new delicious chocolate lava big cup. I love Reese's. They're my favorite. They're my one one goat candy out there, and they've just kicked it up a whole other level with The Reese's chocolate lava big cup. We're eating them this past week, actually. This past month. Yeah, we've been. When we say we have the best job in the world world, part of it is that when you walk into partial HQ this past month, there's been a Reese's chocolate lava big cup just sitting there every single day. You turn around and it's right in your face. And I guess what, I eat it every single time.

[Hank]

So good.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, that hits every time.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. So try the Reese's new delicious chocolate lava big cup. They're huge cups and they are so, so good. Reese's cups. You can buy them basically anywhere. But you got to try that chocolate lava big cup because it has even more perfect with a layer of ooey gooey delicious chocolate lava in the Reese's peanut butter cup. So go check them out now. Reese's peanut butter cups. The Reese's chocolate lava big cup. That's what I'm talking about. We are also brought to you by our friends at TaxAct. Hank. Yeah, it's that time of year.

[Hank]

It sure is.

[PFT Commenter]

So. So the IRS is officially now open and accepting returns. Tax season officially here. How are you feeling?

[Hank]

I'm feeling great for the first tax season in my life. And that is all because I've discovered TaxAct easy to use software. They have a max refund guarantee.

[PFT Commenter]

Wait, that means we can refund our max.

[Hank]

Can't. Not. Not physical. Not person. Max.

[PFT Commenter]

Not person. Max.

[Hank]

Maximum.

[PFT Commenter]

Maximum refund guarantee.

[Hank]

And they have live.

[Big Cat]

I like to get my max max refund in British pounds because I think there'd be a lot of those stones pounds.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Maximum refund guarantee. And they have live tax experts when you need help. If you have a question, they have an answer. If you want to make filing easy this year, just go to taxact.com and get your taxes over with.

[PFT Commenter]

Sounds like you're ready to go this year with the tax.

[Hank]

Yeah. Make filing easy. Go check them out today.

[PFT Commenter]

So you're saying tax act. If you. If you go sign up with tax act right now, you. You don't have to worry. No stress. Stress. It's a stress free. April 15th.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Get it done now.

[Hank]

Yep. Makes the filing super easy.

[PFT Commenter]

Get in front of it. Just get it done. Memes. You're using tax act.

[Tim]

Oh, yeah. Fired up about it.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay, so if memes could use tax act and feel stress free, then you got to go use tax act. That's beautiful. Okay, let's get it back to Tim woods and Dungeons and Dragons then.

[Tim]

Wayne that is going to bring us to you. Great work. Next. What would you like to do?

[Big Cat]

Okay, so I can. I can do my level threes.

[Tim]

You can? Absolutely. Those are your most powerful spells. Now, you each really only get one of those per day.

[Big Cat]

Okay, that's fine. I would like to hypnotize all the invisible enemies in the room. Oh, with the exception of the one who is halfway damaged that we want to take hostage.

[Tim]

I will point out that your hypnotic pattern ability is a great way to take a prison prisoner because it won't kill anybody. It'll just hypnotize them. And then you can decide, do you kill them while they're hypnotized, or do you chain?

[Big Cat]

Okay, then I would like to hypnotize everybody.

[Tim]

Everybody in the room. 100. Are you trying to avoid all of your teammates, or are you not minding if you catch?

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I'd like to. I'd like to avoid all the shredders if I could.

[Tim]

Abs. All the shredders. Anybody else?

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Tim]

Oh, yeah.

[Big Cat]

All the natural born shredders.

[Hank]

Well, you can't tell absolutely.

[Tim]

It's hard to tell who's a shredder and who's not sure.

[PFT Commenter]

If you look up, you want to.

[Tim]

Make sure that you get maybe one of the shredders.

[Big Cat]

I would like to make sure that my hypnotization only works on all characters who, at the start of this episode, were not shredders.

[Tim]

Okay. 100%.

[Big Cat]

I want to keep us safe.

[Tim]

It does sound like maybe there is one person beside the duer getting caught. And so I will first roll for the duer with the axe. The duer with the axe, who's halfway dead is failing the saving throw and ending up hypnotized. Well done. Just barely. Then. The one with the crossbow is not getting hypnotized. I am sorry to say. So right now we've got one who's still loose, and that's the strongest one right now. And then the one with the hand axes who went for Norm.

[Hank]

Good job, dude.

[Tim]

He's also failing and getting hypnotized. So we've only got one who is not hypnotized currently and then can't defeat a stronger opponent. You can roll me a perception check to see if you're noticing anything here right now.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Big Cat]

Which one is that?

[Tim]

That would be a D20. D20, 18, 18 plus. Whatever. You are definitely noticing there's one other invisible person in the room who did not get caught in the hypnosis because you heard them shifting around a little bit. Almost, like, to avoid it a little bit and was like, oh, like, breathing a sigh of relief that they did not get caught. By the way, what hypnotic pattern are you creating that they're now staring and drooling at right now?

[Big Cat]

Hypnotic is in, like, what mood are they in?

[Tim]

I mean, hypnotic pattern is usually like, scintillating lights or like, some display that is making them stare at it, like. Oh. So it'd be something that they really want to look at that they can't take their eyes off.

[Big Cat]

Great rack.

[Tim]

Absolutely. Yeah. There's just these jugs kind of floating in the air. And two, apparently four dwegar in the room right now are just like, like, drooling a little bit. Just one of them's just sort of, like, rubbing his hands a little bit.

[Big Cat]

Is Greg looking at the rack?

[Tim]

So. Right.

[Big Cat]

I'm just curious. I'm just curious if Greg's looking.

[Tim]

Greg, roll. Roll for me to. You're not caught in the spell, but you might want to. Yeah. The higher you roll, the more likely it is you are. Absolutely.

[Big Cat]

Where'd you get Greg? I'm just curious.

[Greg]

No, Greg, I rolled a one.

[Tim]

I did say. I just said the higher you roll, the more likely you are you are looking at it. So apparently you're not interested in these jugs of whatsoever.

[Greg]

I don't care about the perfect round titties at all.

[Tim]

Nope. Apparently not. Not. Couldn't care less. Literally, couldn't care less.

[Big Cat]

You're like Mr. Smithers with the dancers around them.

[Greg]

Wait, do they hurt me?

[Tim]

I did not hurt you. No. I just roll one D20. If you roll low, something happens here.

[Greg]

Two, actually.

[Tim]

With a two, you blink. And for you and only you, they're not, you realize. Oh, they're not boobs at all. It's just a pair of balls.

[Greg]

I'm viewing the titty right now.

[Tim]

100%. Just sort of jiggling a little bit. And so you are 100% noticing this, but you're not hypnotized, I'm going to say. Or maybe a little hypnotized. We'll see on your turn. However, it sounds like maybe one other person might be getting caught in this. Roll me a D20 just to make sure you got the right shredder. As long as you don't get a one, you're fine.

[Big Cat]

I got a ten.

[Tim]

You're fine. Absolutely. I am going to need one wisdom saving throw, which I happen to know you're pretty good at. So you have, like, a plus five on this. Go ahead and roll me a D20 plus five. But you need a 14 or higher against Wayne's spells. How'd you do? Nine. Nine. Five is a 14. Exactly. It is just barely enough that you are not hypnotized. Well done. Absolutely.

[Greg]

That's good.

[Tim]

And Wayne, that was your hypnotic pattern spell. You're now aware two of them are hypnotized. Apparently two Duer, one visible and one invisible in this room are still loose. And that will bring us. Did you want to inspire anybody else on your turn now with a bonus action?

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I'd like to inspire Norm.

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[Big Cat]

Norm, put a shell on the line.

[Tim]

Norm put his shell on the line. What do you say to inspire him?

[Big Cat]

Norm, you're good. It's just you had to rub some dirt on it.

[Tim]

Get back out there 100% with that inspiration. It is now Greg's turn. Greg, what would you like to do?

[Greg]

One of these Dwigar is running away, right?

[Tim]

It does seem like two of them are hypnotized. The one with the crossbow looks a little scared and has this scorpion tailed rat right next to them. And then there is one invisible and we don't know what they're doing.

[Greg]

One's invisible?

[Tim]

Yes. Doesn't seem like any of them are running away just yet, but they're definitely rethinking their strategy here.

[Greg]

I'd like to spin in a circle with my long sword, please.

[Tim]

Ooh, interesting. You're hoping to hit multiple dwgar, is that right?

[Greg]

Just because I. I can't see the invisible ones.

[Tim]

Oh, interesting. Okay, I like that. Are you hoping to hit one of the visible Dwigar or are you just.

[Greg]

Going to try to weed out the invisible?

[Tim]

The invisible one. 100%. Then I'm going to let you roll first of all a D20 to see how likely it is that you crash into them.

[Greg]

14.

[Tim]

14 is just enough that when you add your athletics bonus. I was looking for a 15 or higher. You are crashing into something now. Now roll me a D20 but two times and take the lower number. You have disadvantage because they're invisible. To see whether your sword hits them or not. 7. 7. And roll one more time. Take the lower number. 18. 18. So with the 7 plus your longsword, it says you have a plus what to hit?

[Greg]

Plus 6.

[Tim]

Plus 6. So 7 plus 6. 13. I'm sorry to say you bumped into somebody. Your sword kind of cut into some armor, but it's didn't hit whoever they are. However, you get two attacks per turn. So now you can roll again with disadvantage to try to hit this person.

[Greg]

I do know where they are.

[Tim]

You do know where they. In fact, you don't have disadvantage anymore. I like that. Roll one. Time to hit them. Now.

[Greg]

What is that?

[Big Cat]

That's a 13.

[Tim]

Yeah, looks like a 13. Thirteen, absolutely. Thirteen plus seven is a dirty 20, and that is going to be a hit. Well done. Done. Now, with your sword, it says you have 1d8 plus 3 damage, I think. Is that right?

[Greg]

My long sword is 1D8 plus 3.

[Tim]

Absolutely. Now, that's what it would be if you don't smite. If you burn up one of your valuable smiting spells, it could be an extra 2d8. Or if you burn up a second level one, a very powerful one, that would be an extra 3d8. So you could deal 4d8 plus 3 damage to whoever this is.

[Greg]

I'm holding off on Smite.

[Tim]

You're holding off on Smite? 100%. So it would just be 1D8 plus 3, that's all.

[Max]

Okay.

[Greg]

Is that. Which one is that? This.

[Tim]

This three. The D8 would be this one right here. Kind of looks like two pyramids stuck together.

[Greg]

Seven.

[Tim]

Seven. Absolutely. Seven plus three is going to be ten damage. You hear a grunt from what sounds like a female Dwigar, as far as you can tell, and I'm going to roll because since you hurt them, they might lose their invisibility spell if I get less than a 10 on this. So just one roll. They have a good bonus on this. And with a. The number they needed to get was a 10. They got a 6 plus 3 is only a 9. They become visible. And that is when you see a familiar face. Stepsister is a Dwagar, but it seems as though it is the stepsister of Wayne, who, of course, was not related to him. And you are realizing now there are signs of, like, makeup on her neck still, where she was wearing a disguise that would make her look like a surface dwarf. And she has apparently been a Dwagar this whole time. She was a traitor. She says, I knew I should have left that stupid ogre alive and taken him with me. That simple. But I have the treasure now. Me and my friends and the other Dwyger are like, hey, we're not winning this fight right now. And she grabs the axe, and she is absolutely going to try to fight back against you, but it's not her turn just yet. Greg. Greg. Amazing turn.

[PFT Commenter]

Amazing turn.

[Tim]

Sorry, Greg. Also, I'm just trying to remember. Do you remember what you got on that first attack that would have hit her? I'M trying to remember because I forgot you had baric inspiration. You could have used bic inspiration.

[Greg]

It was a seven. It was low.

[Tim]

There was a low. It was. You're absolutely right. It wouldn't have been enough with the disadvantage. Got it. So you still have baric inspiration if you need it.

[PFT Commenter]

Did we try to. His stepsister.

[Tim]

So his stepsister did join the adventure. We used her as bait to lure out some orcs.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Tim]

I don't think any of us tried to her. The question was whether Wayne would. But that was really hinging on whether she was a step sister or a sister.

[Greg]

What's the rule on disclosing if she was dwgar before we her?

[Tim]

In theory, she kept that from us. So that's kind of on her a little bit. Yeah. So it is. It is a. An issue. Possibly. But the good news is she's definitely not biologically related to you. Now. You can confirm that for sure. And hippo maximus in snapping turtle form. That would bring us to you next.

[Big Cat]

I mean, if you want to call dibs on.

[Greg]

I don't want to call dibs.

[Tim]

We did establish she had very high charisma. She's a looker, your stepsister. Hell, yeah. Still is. Even if she has, like, gray skin and white hair, it kind of looks pretty good. And she's giant size now. Now. So if muscle mommy's your thing, that's absolutely the status at the moment. Yep.

[Big Cat]

We share everything at Shredders.

[Greg]

We do.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, we do. We took it as an oath. Yep. Shredder oath.

[Tim]

I forgot the Shredder oath.

[Max]

Yes.

[Tim]

Everyone say the Shredder oath together.

[Big Cat]

Conquest and always kill.

[PFT Commenter]

Turtles, turtles.

[Tim]

Perfect.

[Greg]

Do we all say that?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tim]

All right.

[Hank]

That's bad for Max, then.

[Max]

No, I'm. I'm disguising myself as a turtle to know more about the species. Something that you wouldn't understand because you're not a shredder.

[Hank]

I am a shredder.

[PFT Commenter]

No, I'm.

[Hank]

I'm a shredder.

[Max]

It's the opposite. You're disguising yourself to be a shredder, but you really only know the turtle ways.

[Big Cat]

You're not like us.

[Tim]

We do have a shredder who's a turtle, and a turtle. Pretty wild. Yeah. Yeah. Up to you. And, you know, Dwegar are gonna go right after your turn. Two of them are hypnotized. Shredt has taken 10 points of damage but is not halfway dead yet. And the dwe gur with the crossbow is also not hypnotized. And is almost halfway dead.

[Big Cat]

I'm getting real confused as to who I want to kill. Which one's the turtle? Which one's the Shredder?

[Max]

No, that's something that this Shredder turned turtle understood when he. When he took this form. But it was a journey that he chose to do to learn more about the enemy at hand.

[PFT Commenter]

But that sounds like something a turtle would say. Yeah.

[Greg]

Do we have a head of lettuce on us to just test?

[Big Cat]

Well, we know Max wouldn't go after the lettuce.

[Tim]

Yeah.

[Max]

Hippo Maximus.

[Tim]

Come on.

[PFT Commenter]

One thing about you and lettuce, they don't go well together.

[Max]

Is there any sort of attack I could do to.

[Big Cat]

I was gonna say dressing.

[PFT Commenter]

Can we put some bacon on it?

[Tim]

Maximus, you do have two healing potions. I'm gonna say that you've been given as a gift. It's the perfect thing to heal. If you get injured or just on a long plane ride, you can drink your two healing potions. Also good.

[Max]

Also good. Well, those. What would those potions do to my current form? Would they bring me back to.

[Tim]

In theory, someone might, like, bust you like drinking them and, like, start telling people about healing potions. But in theory, right now, you could just kind of swallow them.

[Max]

I would like to swallow those.

[Tim]

In theory, you don't need it yet because you haven't been injured.

[Max]

Normal to swallow those potions. Even though other people might think that it's not 100.

[Tim]

It's a long dungeon crop. And you could drink them now you aren't injured yet, so they really wouldn't benefit you at the moment.

[Max]

I still would like to drink them.

[Tim]

You certainly can. Absolutely. It's a long adventure. You drink your healing potions real quick, chug them 100%. Absolutely. And you still got two Dwigar fighting at the moment and two who are hypnotized. Just a war warning. If their turn comes up, they can and might wake up their hypnotized teammates with an action. It eats up their whole action, but they could get their teammates up and running again.

[Max]

So if I fight these Dwe guards and they get hit points on me, will that take away from my turtle status?

[Tim]

Takes away from your turtle hit points, but not your druid hit points. Those.

[Max]

Okay. As much as I love to be a turtle, I'm willing to risk that for the betterment of the team and try and defeat these Dwigars.

[Tim]

Absolutely. You're thinking of attacking them in turtle form or.

[Max]

Yeah, yes, I will. I will be attacking them in turtle form and risking My turtle form?

[Tim]

Absolutely. Assuming that you are going after one of the duer who's still currently fighting, do you want to go after Shredette or do you want to go after the one with the crossbow?

[Max]

I would like to keep Shredette around.

[Tim]

Absolutely. Okay.

[PFT Commenter]

We can learn some shit from her.

[Max]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tim]

Seems almost like they're listening to her. Like she's getting giving them orders even. And so you can go for the one with the crossbow instead. That's when you might be able to take down with a single hit. Go ahead and roll me a D20 plus 5 to see if you can hit this dwgar.

[Max]

That would be 13.

[Tim]

13 plus 5 is 18. That is a hit against the DWE Guar. Well done. And you've got Lola the rat right next to you. Just a heads up. So two animals are currently fighting this dwar with the cross crossbow. You can roll 2d6 plus 4 damage. The dwar has 11h. Sorry. This dwar has 14 hp left right now.

[Max]

So is it. Can I lose hit points to you?

[Tim]

Cannot until they attack you on their turn. And to be fair, by being in melee now, the one with the crossbow can't easily get over to their teammates to wake them up. Well done.

[Max]

So this is 2D6 you said?

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[Max]

2D6 plus 4, 16 and a 1.

[Tim]

A 6 and a 1. So 7 plus 4 is 11 more damage. Brings us to her up to 22. They have four hit points left. That is all they are on their last legs. Well done. So and in theory, with your bonus action, you could change back if you're done with turtle form. But if you stay in turtle form, you keep those hit points.

[Max]

Now I'm done with the turtle form. I've learned what I need to know about the Turtle form.

[Tim]

Absolutely 100%. You change back into druid form. Is that right?

[Max]

Is there any way that I can like bring everyone back to what they originally were?

[Tim]

Unfortunately not. Unless you have dispel magic to end this guy.

[Max]

Good to know. I just wanted to know.

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[Big Cat]

What did you learn from being a turtle? I learned a lot about how they think.

[PFT Commenter]

Can we trust you?

[Tim]

Yeah.

[Max]

No.

[PFT Commenter]

He's a turtle though. When you were a turtle, were you kind of untrustworthy?

[Max]

There's something about a turtle that they do things in a way that is just really annoying to others. And I felt that annoyance within myself.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh.

[Max]

So I had to get out of that.

[Big Cat]

Like talk down to you.

[Tim]

Yep.

[Big Cat]

Troll.

[Max]

They're also dumb and they think that they're in on Something when they're really not.

[Greg]

Interesting.

[Tim]

Interesting.

[Hank]

God, it's all shredders here.

[Tim]

Absolutely. Just a bunch of shredders. And it is. That is a great turn. You turn back into human form. Is that right? Yeah, back shredder form. So that was just specifically five shredders hanging out. What a cliche. And so you are absolutely up to the dwar's turn now. I'm going to roll, and if I roll really high, this Dwigar is feeling bold and brave enough to try to wake up one of his teammates. But if he does, that's two attacks of opportunity he's going to be provoking. He's not willing to risk it. He tries to decide is he going to go after Lola or is he going to go after you? Lola, I'm so sorry. But instead of going after the turtle, this dwar pulls out his hammer and tries to squish Lola. He needs a 13 or higher. And he's got a plus five on this, sorry to say. With a 17. Lola is getting hit by this hammer. Lola does have 10 GP.

[Big Cat]

Got to look after.

[Tim]

And this hammer is going to deal this much. Plus four. Let's see. Oh, I rolled a natural one. And with only 5 damage, Lola still has half of her hit points. So Lola's at 5 out of 10. That is that Dwigar's turn. Then. Shredette is going to stand up. Now, the last person to attack her was you. She looks at you, takes her hand in the air and just. You think she's going to do some kind of magic? She. But it's not to attack you. She starts to wave her hands in her face. Uh oh. And she begins to fade away and turn invisible again. She's trying to reach invisible and she points at the bodies on the ground and says, hey, I know you guys are having a lot of fun right now, but I gotta turn invisible. I'm so sorry. Right now. And I. She does start to vanish before your very eyes, but you can feel her nearby. You feel her start to move away from you. You. You can take one free attack against her, but since she's invisible, you have disadvantage on this. You got to roll two times and take the lower number.

[Big Cat]

Is she not hypnotized?

[Tim]

She is not hypnotized. I'm sorry to say. Shredt had been invisible when you cast the spell. She was caught in it, but she passed a saving throw just barely 18. 18. And then 12. 12, 12. And then you had a plus. What with your long sword again. Plus three. Three. Or. Sorry. That was one D8 plus three, right?

[Greg]

Three.

[PFT Commenter]

What's.

[Tim]

What's the. Did it hit plus six? A six. And you just got a 12 on the D20, so. Plus six. Her armor class is 18. And was that the lower the two numbers? Was the 12? Absolutely. That is just barely a hit against her. So you get one D8 plus three. Unless you're smiting, in which case you get a lot more damage.

[Greg]

Are we trying to have her as host? This is your stepsister, Shredette.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, we want a huge. Yeah.

[Tim]

Now, if you bring someone down to say you're dealing.

[Big Cat]

Moth, isn't it?

[Tim]

Not really.

[Greg]

That's Lil Shredder.

[Big Cat]

Oh, Little Shred.

[Tim]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay. Y.

[Big Cat]

Now I'm back.

[PFT Commenter]

So, wait.

[Greg]

Do you want me to smite your sister? Has she been bad?

[Big Cat]

Well, she. She took the axe, we think, Right?

[Greg]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

We need to get secrets out of her so we.

[Greg]

I don't want to smite her. Let's not kill her. I don't want to risk killing.

[Big Cat]

She knows a lot of secrets, guys.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[Greg]

No smite.

[Tim]

Please not smiting her. Roll 1d8 plus 3.

[Greg]

1.

[Tim]

Ooh. Four more damage on Shredt is gonna bring her up to 14. You can't tell if she's halfway dead or not. Then again, you just dealt damage to her while she's invisible. Let's see if she maintains her invisibility. And her invisibility is broken. You can see her running behind the throne. She opens up the door behind the throne and tries to run through it. So you did get the free attack. She's no longer invisible thanks to that attack. You can tell with 14 damage, she's very close to halfway dead, but not quite there. And she just disappeared through a door, unfortunately. But she couldn't have gotten very far beyond that door. So we know it's the fifth door, the one to the east, just behind the throne that she just ran through. We can chase her, no problem. But there's still one conscious Dwigar in the room with us, and she ditched the two who are hypnotized, so. So, well done on the duar turn. We withstood them.

[Big Cat]

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[Tim]

Toe now gets to go. And you can have him run up and just roll a D20 plus four.

[PFT Commenter]

Can he ask sh a question or no?

[Tim]

He could if she was still in the room. Unfortunately, she just ran for it. So right now he's going to help us try to kill the dwe guard with the crossbow if that's what you want him to do.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay, nine.

[Tim]

Absolutely. And unfortunately he doesn't doesn't have advantage n so unfortunately he clangs and is fighting with the duar. Who has his hammer out. Who had the crossbow but not hitting him, unfortunately.

[Big Cat]

Cute.

[Tim]

That is going to. And poopy stinks is also dead now. So that is going to bring us to you. Norm. Norm, what would you like to do? Shredtte ran for it. There's two Dagar who are hypnotized and one who has four hit points left in a hammer and cross.

[PFT Commenter]

What do you guys think? Should we follow shtet?

[Greg]

I would like to follow her. Not.

[PFT Commenter]

I really want to ask for debt. Like, I know we've all met her, but, like, did she know any of us before we met her? Yeah, like anyone in this room.

[Big Cat]

She's got the axe, right? We think she has the axe.

[PFT Commenter]

All right, let's follow.

[Tim]

She claimed she did.

[Big Cat]

She lies about a lot of stuff.

[PFT Commenter]

Follow her.

[Hank]

Let's.

[PFT Commenter]

Let's get everyone going. Follow floor and. And attack her again. We don't want to kill her though, right? We want to get her as weak as possible.

[Greg]

You want to see where she's running to?

[PFT Commenter]

Can I kidnap her? I don't know.

[Tim]

Certainly could.

[PFT Commenter]

Let's kidnap.

[Tim]

You chase her. You run behind the big throne, kick that door open, and sure enough, it's a dead end room. It looks like it's the war room of the ancient dwarves. There's a table with all these maps of the mountain on the table. So that's good information for us. This is a map of the level level we're on that has labeling on it in dwarvish, which Wayne can speak. And standing on the table like a badass. Shredt is standing there with her awesome, great sword pointed at you. She's nervous because she's no longer invisible. And she says, bring it. And you can absolutely attack her. It's kind of hard since she's visible. You can aim to knock her out.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Tim]

Or you could just roll intimidation and try to get her straight. Surrender though.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Tim]

After attacking.

[PFT Commenter]

All right, so let's get her to surrender.

[Tim]

Oh, do you want to attack her first and then see if she surrender? The more you injure her, the more likely she'll surrender.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay, before I do that, can I. We're all together, right? I would just like to. Just a little credit card swipe of Greg's 100.

[Greg]

Can I roll for clench?

[Tim]

Yes. 100. The higher you roll, the tighter you clench.

[Greg]

That's an 18.

[Tim]

It's an 18. You barely get your card through it, to be honest. It gets a little stuck. You're like, is this thing scanning? Like, is this one of those, like, attachments? And you. You almost. I think you do this and you realize you don't have a card in your hand anymore and you kind of gotta fish it out like a Chinese finger trap.

[Max]

It's really good.

[Tim]

That's really good because that's plus athletics. So that's really a 23 at the end of the day.

[PFT Commenter]

Keeps denying me and it's just want it more.

[Tim]

I think you actually need to make a check if you want.

[Big Cat]

Greg knows exactly it was.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, it was my fingers for a moment.

[Tim]

But with your strength, you yank him free at the very last minute. But they're like. They're like swollen a little bit. Okay. All right.

[PFT Commenter]

All right. Yeah, let's. Let's. Let's up Shredette.

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[PFT Commenter]

So we can kidnap her and get her secrets.

[Tim]

Can I assume you're going reckless? Oh, of course. So you can roll two times on the first attack.

[Big Cat]

Who says? No, No, I don't think I.

[PFT Commenter]

That's not good.

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[PFT Commenter]

Seven. That's not.

[Tim]

Seven is not great. With a plus six to your attacks, I think. Or even a plus seven it might be. Unfortunately, that is not going to be a hit. But you only get. You get two attacks. So you can roll again with advantage because you went reckless. Incidentally, Norm, all the barbarian awls, when I run the game for them and I ask them whether they go reckless, they say, just like Norm. Yeah, you know it, Tim. I. They all want to be like Norm. You can roll two times on the D20 again.

[PFT Commenter]

11. 4.

[Tim]

Oh, now you. The 11 was the higher roll. Can I just ask you to check your sheet? It's a plus seven to hit. That means you got an 18 and 18 is the number you needed to hit trident. Go ahead and roll.

[Big Cat]

Got to be 18.

[PFT Commenter]

2 2, 2 sixes.

[Tim]

A2D6 is absolutely plus 6. Dirty 18.

[PFT Commenter]

5 and 5.

[Tim]

5 and 5 is amazing. With 16 more damage, Shredt is up to 30 damage. One more attack will take her down for sure. She is way more than halfway dead. You think she has maybe like 5hp left and you can take her down. Well done. But she's fighting with you. In fact, fact, she's so injured now if you want to use your bonus action to intimidate her into surrendering, you would have advantage.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay, let's.

[Tim]

Let's intimidate her two times and take the higher number.

[PFT Commenter]

13, 16.

[Tim]

I am looking for a 20 or higher. What is your intimidation? It's plus one. Plus one. I am sorry to say it is not quite enough, unfortunately. But it's only because Shredt is a true badass. Any one of the other Dwegar would have surrendered with that role. She is still fighting and she's like looking to see if she can run out around you. Good luck. She probably can pull that off. Absolutely. And Erlich, this is going to bring us around to you again. What would you like to do?

[Hank]

So for. For Lola, I would like to take out the Crossbow guy.

[Tim]

Absolutely. 100. He's got 4 HP left. Smart move right ahead and. And try to sting him.

[Hank]

10.

[Tim]

10. 10 +5 is a 15. You'd be missing by a single point with that, I'm sorry to say. So close. So he's still hanging on right now. What would you like to do with your action?

[Hank]

I feel like. I feel like there's going to be a lot of competition, so I would like to charm Shredette.

[Tim]

Ooh, absolutely. You can try to charm. Charm her. You cast charm person on trident, and I get one saving throw. If I don't get a 14 or higher and she has only a plus one on this, then she is charmed by you.

[Big Cat]

So you didn't think to ask me if it was cool?

[Greg]

Yeah, it's the Shredder code to never charm.

[Big Cat]

Like, everybody knows that. Shredder code.

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. The oath was, we as Shredders, promise.

[Big Cat]

To never charm another Shredder.

[Tim]

Stepsister.

[PFT Commenter]

Stepsister.

[Big Cat]

Without. Without permission. Permission from Shredder.

[PFT Commenter]

And also turtles.

[Tim]

Turtles, like we say in the mirror every morning.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Tim]

And so article two, with a plus of a bonus. The total. And she needed a 14 to avoid being charmed. The total is a 13. She is charmed by you, Erlich. Just barely. And she starts to look at you with little hearts rising from her head in an admiring way. She's saying, I'll get my way past you, barbarian. And then when I. Whoa, wait a minute. Who's that Shredder over there? For some reason, that compared to all the other Shredders, that one Shredder, for some reason is, like, really good looking. I don't know why. And she can't put her finger on it. Anytime you make a persuasion check on her her, you now have advantage for the duration of the next hour, after which she will be like, what the was happening to me? And she will start to realize that she was under a charm spell. But well done, Erlich. Was there anything else you wanted to do on your turn? That was your.

[PFT Commenter]

Could I use.

[Hank]

Could I use the investigation skill to take a look at these maps?

[Tim]

You certainly could. Absolutely. I believe your character actually speaks dish. At the very least, Gnomish is based off of Dwarvish, so go ahead and roll an investigation check. D20 plus investigation. Great bonus action there.

[Hank]

16 plus 5.

[Tim]

Absolutely. And just so you know, as you're looking at the maps, she was standing on the table. So you look at the maps and you see her feet, and she takes one step closer to you, and then another step and you kind of look up and you realize she's standing right above you and says, well, hello there, handsome. And what was your total on that again?

[Hank]

16.

[Tim]

16. With a 16, you're gonna learn two important facts. First of all, before you learn any of those facts, I'm gonna tell you right now, it's clearly a map of the dungeon you're in right now. There's a map of the upper floor. There's also a map of this floor. And now you can tell there's labeling marked on this room. It says war room. And it even says, like, stepsister Shredette sleeps. He, like, hangs out here. Nobody else is allowed in the war room. And Unless I give you permission. But there's runes labeling the other four doors that we don't know about. Which door do you want to know about first? You're going to learn about two things in this period of time. You get to pick northwest, northeast, southwest, or southeast.

[Hank]

And this is something that, like, I'm. I'm only learning this information. Like, they don't know that I know this. Right? All right, so I'll go northwest, north.

[Tim]

Apparently, they have labeled in dwarvish that this is an old dwarven temple. Beyond the northwestern door, she has written treasure. Question mark. Like, she's not sure if there's treasure, meaning that whatever treasure she has, it's not that treasure. But it also says on the door, a little arrow is pointing to the door into the temple, and it says. And you did remember there were, like, runes on the door, but they were tiny and hard to read. And it says riddle when it points to that door. Door for some reason. So there might be treasure. There's a riddle on the door, apparently, and it says old dwarven temple. And then there is a symbol that just says danger inside of that temple. So that's what you learn first. What else you've got Northeast, southwest, and southeast.

[Hank]

Let's go southwest.

[Tim]

Southwest. Southwest is labeled old kitchen. And then it says wizard. Old dwarven wizard. Weird. Animated furniture. Danger. Weird. And that is all you have time to learn about so far. Right now, I will say. And that is Erlik's bonus action. Well done, Erlik. That is going to bring us to Wayne next. And none of us know that information just yet. Wayne, what would you like to do? Currently, your sister's charmed, but still fighting us at the moment. Unless. Sorry, did you ask the sister to not.

[PFT Commenter]

Where are you going?

[Greg]

Where are you going?

[PFT Commenter]

Where are you going?

[Hank]

I gotta. I gotta take a piss.

[Tim]

Do you tell this is your Stop fighting us. Or do you tell her to keep fighting them?

[Hank]

Keep fighting.

[Tim]

Keep fighting. Absolutely. She's still fighting us. So is the Dwegar who had the crossbow. So we got two Dwegar who are still fighting us at the moment. Wayne.

[Big Cat]

Why would he do that? I thought he was with us.

[PFT Commenter]

We gotta put our shredder masks on.

[Tim]

How badges are sounded by shredders suddenly?

[Greg]

I thought he was Hank.

[Big Cat]

Why would he tell. Why would he tell her to keep fighting us if he's one of us?

[Greg]

That doesn't make any sense.

[Big Cat]

She's going to know that he's not a shredder once they get together. Last time, she gets the pants off. Yeah, once you go shredder, it's never been wetter. She's going to see him and be like, you're not a shredder.

[Greg]

Yeah, right. Every shredder's cut.

[Tim]

I'm.

[Big Cat]

I'm a little upset.

[PFT Commenter]

You. You have every right to be.

[Big Cat]

How far away from Erlich are we right now?

[Tim]

You are pretty close to Erlich. You're within. You look like a pigman.

[PFT Commenter]

Inside out. I think you're inside out. Take the mask off.

[Tim]

You obviously can see Erlik and either cast spells or move into melee with him.

[Big Cat]

Okay, but I can't. I can't go level three anymore.

[Tim]

Right. Actually, I was mistaken. Now that I think about it, you actually have two level two, three spell slots at level six.

[Big Cat]

Can I. I can go level two as well.

[Tim]

You could? Yes.

[Big Cat]

Could I create a zone of Truth?

[Tim]

Yes, you certainly could.

[Big Cat]

Ask my stepsister. Like, what do you see in this guy?

[Tim]

Absolutely. Go ahead. And you create this zone of truth that no one can lie in. I'm going to roll for your stepsister. And. Perfect. You know she can't lie. Now, you could also cast it in such a way that it covers. Covers Erlich, and in such a way that it will also cover Norm, who's in that room.

[Big Cat]

I trust Norm, absolutely. But I'd like to cover Erlich as well.

[Tim]

You cover Erlich as well? So both of them are in the Zone of Truth. He's gonna have to roll to see if he can lie or not. But definitely your stepsister is not lying at the moment. You say, what do you see in this guy? And she blurts out, I don't know. He just seems like the kind of shredder that I'm into, and I think I might even be charmed. Wait, what? As she says that out loud, she gets another saving throw now, but I'll Say maybe with disadvantage because he's already charmed. Yeah, unfortunately, she says, maybe I'm even charmed. And she goes, oh, I guess I'm charmed by his personality. She's confused a little bit. It's starting to like. She's like looking at her hands getting a little like trippy. She's. She's starting to realize what's going on, but not quite.

[Big Cat]

It seems I probably should ask where the ax was.

[Tim]

No. Truth. No, no.

[Max]

There's more important thing.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, yeah, absolutely.

[Tim]

Hey.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, you're back.

[Hank]

I'm back.

[Tim]

I would like you just roll a D20 for me real quick.

[Hank]

Any particular reason?

[Tim]

You'll find out. Just a moment. It is A spell has been cast upon you and the stepsister.

[Hank]

Can I send. Send a C counter spell you actually have?

[Tim]

Oh, you certainly could.

[Greg]

That's a declaration of war.

[Tim]

Absolutely. Are you counter spelling this? It is automatically successful if you do a third level counter spell that instantly negates any level two spell. And so the moment you realize you want to roll an arcana, check to see if you knew what spell it was.

[Hank]

Yeah, I rolled a 13.

[Tim]

Perfect. Excellent. With a 13 plus whatever your arcana is. You knew it was a zone of truth spell.

[Big Cat]

So he declined to take the polygraph is what I'm hearing.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Tim]

The spell absolutely affected your stepsister for just a moment. She kind of blurted out that she finds him handsome and she might be trying arm. But before it could really even help her start to break free, he counter spells it, unweaving the very magic you just wove. I'm sorry to say it means both of you have burned up a spell slot.

[Big Cat]

Now that's what I hear.

[Tim]

Absolutely. And that was your action. Anything with your bonus action, you can inspire somebody. You could do a healing word. Whatever you want to do. Is anybody injured at the moment? Yes, Norm is injured. Injured.

[Big Cat]

Oh, yeah. Heal him up.

[Tim]

Absolutely. You give him a little healing. That would be a D4. The pyramid shaped die plus three.

[Big Cat]

Okay.

[Tim]

It's four or you get seven hit points back. Norm, Norm, you're only two hit points down.

[PFT Commenter]

Now I'm going to need those coming.

[Max]

Who knows where this battle's going to go.

[Tim]

And Wayne, amazing turn that is going to bring us to Greg. Now, Greg, what would you like to do?

[Greg]

I want to torture. Shred at. You guys want to torture her?

[Big Cat]

Yeah, I mean, she seems like she turned her back on us.

[Greg]

Is there any. Does anybody have any rope or chains?

[Tim]

We've all got rope.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Greg]

I want to try to tie her up.

[Tim]

Absolutely. Go ahead and do an athletics check. I believe that's a plus five. So a D20 plus five.

[Greg]

Six.

[Tim]

Six plus five. You are going to tie her up. She immediately goes, what?

[PFT Commenter]

What are you doing?

[Tim]

No, no, no. Are you telling her what you're doing? Are you just fighting her and trying to.

[Greg]

We're about to torture you.

[Tim]

She's gonna try to resist that. Then with a plus two, she has actually a plus four in all. So let's see. She needs an 11 or higher to beat you, sorry to say, with the 12 plus 4, that's a 16. She avoids getting tied up. I would let you try again with your second attack back. Or you could stab her with your sword.

[Greg]

Hank, can you talk to her? You have her charmed.

[Hank]

Can I?

[Tim]

I would let you try.

[Hank]

What would you like?

[Tim]

One persuade.

[Greg]

Convince her it'll be fine. Yeah.

[Tim]

Because you're doing this as a reaction. I'm gonna only let you roll once. Even though you normally have advantage on your turn. You'll have advantage.

[Hank]

1D20.

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[Hank]

4.

[Tim]

4. I'm sorry to say you're telling her just like let him tie you up. And she goes, no, you may be not him. And she does not seem to want to get tied up, unfortunately. Now, you could try again with your the rest of your action if you want, but she's still fighting you at the moment.

[Greg]

I'm gonna try again.

[Tim]

Absolutely. I'll tell you right now the number you need to beat this time with a natural 20. You need to get a 24 or higher. You have two rolls on.

[PFT Commenter]

Why you laugh?

[Greg]

17, actually.

[Tim]

I'm sorry, you don't have two rolls, but you just. The number you need to get was a 24. What's your athletics bonus?

[Greg]

I do not have one.

[Tim]

Oh, I thought you did. Why? You just went your strength. I know what I'm going to do with my quite.

[Greg]

I wasted my turn trying to tor.

[Tim]

Unfortunately not having fighting with her and she is not tied up at the moment. It is now Hippo Maximus's turn. And I guess you could order your moth to do something if you wanted to.

[Greg]

No, it's fine for right now. It's fine for right now.

[Tim]

Absolutely. Hippo Maximus, right after you go, the sister's gonna get a chance to do something. Stepsister and the dwigar with the hammer and crossbow who has four hit points left, is gonna get to do something, including wake up a teammate if he really wants to.

[Max]

Now, there's one teammate that I don't necessarily trust and I think that for the benefit of the rest of us shredders, there's five of us right now. I would like to question one of them.

[Tim]

Yes, absolutely. Now, technically, neither of them have surrendered just yet. Shredt likes one of us, and the other one is not surrendered. But it would be very easy to get them to surrender. Do you want to try to get them to surrender first and then ask them questions?

[Max]

Yes, I think I'd like to get them to surrender.

[Tim]

I'll say you've got one role, a D20 plus one, because it's hard to intimidate people in terms turtle form. D20 plus one.

[Max]

Okay. That would be a 14.

[Tim]

14 plus one is a 15. Were you trying to intimidate Shredette? Who is the harder? The. The hypnotized ones can't be. Like, they're not hearing anybody right now. So your choices are Shredt, who is hard to convince, or the dwar with the crossbow and the hammer with four hit points left.

[Max]

I still would like the shredt.

[Tim]

Yeah. Oh, y. You're trying against sht and you got a 15 total. Unfortunately, I'll roll. If I roll really bad, then she is intimidated by you and answering questions not low enough. I would say that was your.

[Hank]

On the defensive. Come up.

[Tim]

You could attack somebody or try to intimidate another duar, including Shredette if you wanted to.

[Hank]

Dude, we got to take out the. We got a weak dragar, and if he lives, he's going to wake up. Use your head.

[Tim]

I don't.

[Max]

What do you guys think?

[Big Cat]

What does he mean by we? He didn't do that on his turn.

[Max]

What do you guys think?

[Greg]

Yeah, just narrow it down.

[Max]

Okay.

[Tim]

Okay.

[Greg]

All right.

[Tim]

We'll go for the dwe gur with your bite attack. In turtle form, that'd be a D20 plus five. We think we need a 16 to hit this. Dwight.

[Max]

Wait, I thought I changed out of turtle form.

[Tim]

Oh, I'm so sorry. Right. You're no longer in turtle form form. So you can either use an attack with your scimitar or you could use a spell. Spells are much more powerful.

[Max]

I would like to use a spell.

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[Max]

Could I use. I'll use the moon beam. A space laser. Space laser, you cal.

[PFT Commenter]

I didn't know you had that hiding. A moon beam. Oh, yeah.

[Max]

I have a moon.

[PFT Commenter]

Tell us now.

[Tim]

Normally, this space laser. Clear sky. Instead. Instead, it's coming through the ceiling. It doesn't destroy the ceiling or anything, but it passes through the ceiling, and suddenly this big column of light lands on. Is it shredt. Or is it the duer? With four hit points, we're gonna.

[Max]

We're gonna take care of the dwe guar. We'll get to shredette later. But there's something about. We're gonna.

[Tim]

Now the beam comes down. It could cover. I can put it a good word next to this guy. It could hit you. I assume you don't want it to. It could also hit the dwar and Lola, I assume you're only trying to. To hit the dwar.

[Big Cat]

I don't give a. I don't.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Max]

I'm willing to risk Lola for sure.

[Tim]

Absolutely. So the moonbeam comes down. It's hitting two people in its square. So I will first roll the saving throw for the duar. He is failing the saving throw just barely. He will take the full damage. And then I'm gonna need Lola to roll for me. A D20 plus 3 need a 14 or higher.

[Hank]

And a 4.

[Tim]

A 4 is not going to be enough. Lola is also taking the full damage, which is two D10 damage. So the D10 is sort of shaped like this.

[PFT Commenter]

It's a shame.

[Big Cat]

Like a gusher match.

[Tim]

Roll two of them and add them together. It is like a gusher. You're right. Absolutely.

[Max]

That's one way to know. What that's how you just have to.

[Tim]

Dang. Bothering me my whole life. And I'm like, yeah, what kind of.

[Max]

Sweet treat.

[Tim]

For the rest of my life I'm gonna be wanting to munch on these?

[Max]

Okay, so I have two of these.

[Tim]

And add them together.

[Max]

All right. First one. That would be a one.

[Tim]

Oh, no. We want the maximum damage so that we can. I mean, not nine. Nine. There you go. So 10 damage kills the DAR with the crossbow and the hammer. One DAR finally down. However, Lola is caught in the moon beam.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, no.

[Max]

Damn it.

[Tim]

And instantly incinerates like she was never there.

[PFT Commenter]

Now, who is Lola was friends with who?

[Tim]

Lola was friends with Erlock. She was not just his friend, but his summoned familiar, his spirit that he bound from the Nine Hells. Now, Lola is not dead. She goes back to the nine hells. In 24 hours, you'll be able to summon her again. But that she's probably gonna have a good time going. She's gonna be a nice place. She's going home. She's gonna check on her family and stuff. She'll come back soon if you are alive to summon her. And so Hippo Maximus. Amazing turn. That was your action. Can't think of anything with a bonus action there. So unless There was anything you wanted to do with the bonus action, it would now be Shredt's turn. Anything else you want to do with a bonus?

[Max]

No, I'm willing to pass to Shredt.

[Tim]

Absolutely. I'm going to roll. The higher roll, the more Shredette wants to run. The lower I roll, the more she wants to make out with Erlik. So. Ooh, with a six. That's not a very high roll. She starts to get ready to run, and then instead she stops, looks at Erlik, and says, we should make out. But first. First we've got to think smart. What should I do? And she looks at Norm and gets her weapons ready. Do you think she should attack Norm, or do you think she should do something else? Instead, she is. She is in front of everyone asking you this. You can say nothing.

[Hank]

And then can I whisper something to her so they don't hear?

[Tim]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. She leans in while she's getting her weapons.

[Hank]

Attack.

[Tim]

Attack, Norm.

[Max]

But don't.

[Hank]

Don't. No one else knows I said that.

[Tim]

Absolutely. 100. As Norm is trying to lean in to hear what you're saying, Norm, I'll let you roll a D20 if you roll a 10. That was a good whisper. 15 or higher.

[Greg]

I'm looking for 17.

[Tim]

17. You heard the whisper. The ax is coming down upon you. The first roll is a hit because of advantage from you being reckless. And then the second one is a critical hit against you, Norm, I am sorry to say. And so that is gonna be with her great ax. The first hit is a. Would have been a total of a 15. However, that's only seven damage against you, knocking you back down to 50. It ate up the healing. Then the critical hit hits you. It is gonna hit you. She swung the axe and cut into your shoulder. As you're recovering, I might have to ask, Norm, what would you call your most precious body part? She is critically hitting you so she can hit something very precious to you.

[PFT Commenter]

Greg, why don't you answer that? Oh, what do you like about me the most?

[Greg]

Physically, it's. It's your legs. But pallet wise, it's. It's your.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Tim]

She does a quick maneuver. Does it jump over you, lands, stands behind you, brings the ax up, and she's credit card swiping you with the battle ax, I'm sorry to say. And with a battle ax right up the butthole. Plus five is gonna be no. Plus four is 14. Seven more damage against you is gonna knock you down to 43 left on Norm. The barbarian out of your original 59. And then I'm just gonna roll one more time. Yes. She then tries to make a run for it out of the door. Norm, you can make one more attack against her as she runs if you want.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, I'd love to.

[Tim]

She has five hit points left. If you hit her now, unfortunately, it's not your turn. So you don't have advantage on this. You don't get to go reckless on attacks of opportunity, but in spirit. In spirit, you are reckless. Thank you. Absolutely.

[Greg]

Good clarification.

[Tim]

Yes.

[PFT Commenter]

Not six.

[Tim]

Six plus seven, I'm sorry to say, is a 13. Not quite a hit. She runs out the door of the war room again. She is running to the southeast, it seems.

[PFT Commenter]

Well.

[Tim]

And that is going to bring us from the Dweigar turn because. Oh, and let me just roll to see if she's able to wake up any of her teammates. She would have to roll very high to do that while she's running. Nope. She rolled very low. Both of her teammates stay hypnotized. She runs for the southeastern door. I'm gonna roll to see if she makes it there.

[Big Cat]

University of Texas.

[Tim]

She did make it. She just barely threw open the door of the southeastern room, a room we don't know what is beyond there. Opened it, shut it behind her almost instantly. And we thought we heard the ringing of hammers and we hear some shouting in that room now.

[Big Cat]

We'll get back to Tim woods and D D in a second, but it's brought to you by Aroxel on because we need to talk about the elephant in the room. Erectile dysfunction. One in four men 18 years and older experience ED, which means that you or someone close to you might be experiencing it. That's why I want to tell you about this new ED treatment gel. It's called a Roxon. It's the first ED treatment gel that's clinically proven. You get results that you can get over the counter. While it might not work for everyone, studies showed success in over 60% of men. The best part, no prescriptions, no online questionnaires needed. Why wait? Try a Roxanne today. Available in stores and online. Visit a Roxon US to learn more. That's E R O x o n us and you can learn more. DND is also brought to you by UberEats, where you can get almost. Almost anything. It's winter and you can now get almost anything you need for the coldest months of the year delivered with UberEats. What do we mean by almost? Well, you can't get a snow Plow delivered. Delivered. But you can get snow peas delivered. Sunshine. That's no. But a bottle of wine, that's a yes. Snow angel? Nope. Angel hair pasta. Yes. Ubereats can get you that, along with a side of garlic bread and some creme brulee to top it all off. Get almost almost anything for your winter delivered with Ubereats. Order now. Alcohol in select markets. Product availability may vary by region. See the app for details. Now more detail D and that is.

[Tim]

Going to bring us from the duar turn to Magnus Steel toe gets to go now. You want your friend Magnus Steel to do anything, right?

[PFT Commenter]

Yes, I want Magnus Steel toe to slap Erlich.

[Tim]

Certainly he will do that for you. Erlich. He's going to walk up to you. Roll me a D. 20 plus 4 for Magnus steel toe.

[PFT Commenter]

That's a 16 slap.

[Tim]

16 plus 4 is a dirty 20 on the bit. Slap. So that is going to be a hit. Were you trying to damage him with the slap or just make a point?

[PFT Commenter]

Little damage, little damage, little this, little that.

[Tim]

I'm going to say it's three points of damage in all against Erlich the warlock.

[Greg]

Is it towards his Shredder head or.

[Tim]

It's a great point. Were you slapping him in the face? Given that you don't necessarily know this, but the Shredder head is floating above Erlich's actual gnomish head.

[PFT Commenter]

No, I don't. I want to go for lower.

[Tim]

Yeah, I'll say that. She can swipe through, realize it's an illusion, and then still smack him in the face.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, let's do that.

[Tim]

So she realizes he's not as tall as he seems. Her hand goes right through his head, and then she backhands below where Shredder's stomach would be. It hits Erlich right in the face for three points of damage. Erlich, you're down to 42 out of 45 left, which puts you, Norm, just one point of damage ahead. Head of Erlich right now. And that will be all of the duar turn and Magnus Steel toe's turn. Bring us to Norm's turn now. Norm, your official turn is now up. What would you like to do? You saw Shredette run through the southeastern door. You don't know any information about the other doors. And you know that there are two hypnotized dar in the room. There's also a map in front of you that you could try to study. But I'll warn you, that's not what barbarians are good at.

[PFT Commenter]

That's not my. I'm not smart. What do you guys think? Should we go to the door or.

[Greg]

I mean, she doesn't have the act. Does she have the ax?

[Tim]

She doesn't have any.

[Greg]

Behind what seems right.

[Tim]

No.

[Greg]

We could let her live.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah. So let's get to. But I think the ax might be behind this last tour.

[Greg]

Yeah, she was running towards there.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay, so let's get in there.

[Tim]

Absolutely. You throw open the door to the southeastern room, revealing a mighty force forge works. There are all of these anvils with chains going above them with, like, big mine carts and stuff that are hovering by. You see that she is shouting orders at a pair of Dwigar with goggles on, looking very shredder because of their spiky armor. They pick up these weapons that norm, since you're looking at them, you can roll a D20 minus one to see if you can figure out what the hell these weapons. Weapons are 20. Oh, a natural 20.

[PFT Commenter]

Natural 20.

[Tim]

You are able to put together what's going on here. These look almost like blunderbusses. An item that does exist in the world of D and D. Primitive, simple guns, basically. Except they have little sparks of fire at the end, like a pilot light kind of that just keep flickering. They get these weapons, they begin to march towards you with them pointing them at you. And one of them, I think that's why you got a critical hit. Had to test his out. He presses the trigger and like a dragon's breath. Okay, these flamethrowers are getting closer and closer to you. I'm going to roll the flamethrower dar into initiative. Separately, they are going to go after Magnus's next turn. So luckily you got some time. But you notice that in this room, there is. Is a. On the eastern side, a pit that drops down into the depths below, as if it leads to a third level of this dungeon, it seems.

[PFT Commenter]

Wow.

[Tim]

And just before that pit, there is a Dwigar chained up, but not against his will. He's an old Dwigar, almost as old as the high priest.

[Big Cat]

That guy's got to be a blacksmith. He's got to be like a worker.

[Tim]

He seems like he is managing the forge, giving the orders to the other blacksmiths who have the flamethrowers now. And he looks like he's a forge priest of some kind, using forge magic to make better items. And it is clear that he is in charge of this whole operation in this room. But the stepsister is shouting orders to him as well as the two guys with flamethrowers right now. Okay, you could go for shredding debt. You could go for one of the two guys with flamethrowers. The problem with going for the forge priest up in the air is he's like suspended in midair right now, and it seems like he's guarding the drop off down below where, like the minecarts would start descending down. Like there is a system of chains for lowering and raising things over there.

[Big Cat]

Guys, I think we've stumbled into, like, a severe slave operation where my stepsister is keeping all these people against their will, making them work for her. They would probably hate her way more than we would.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Greg]

Try to convince them they're free.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Tim]

It seemed like they don't get them on our side with shred that. Yeah, it's true.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay. Can I jump into the pit?

[Tim]

You could if you really wanted.

[PFT Commenter]

Can I jump into the pit with my boys?

[Tim]

100. You could, absolutely. You'll be running past the guys with the flamethrowers, but they wouldn't be get to hit you. You'd be running past sht. She might get to hit you. And then you'd be running under the forge priest. And you can try to jump down if you want. Is that what you'd like to do?

[PFT Commenter]

You guys want to jump in the pit? Let's find this axe.

[Tim]

Yeah, absolutely.

[PFT Commenter]

Let's find it.

[Greg]

Who's jumping in first?

[PFT Commenter]

We're. We're all jumping together. But I would like to make sure that when we jump together, I'm holding Greg.

[Tim]

Absolutely. So you grab Greg. You pick him up in your arm. Arms.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, Big arms. Yes, absolutely. Charms you.

[Tim]

Only you would be able to carry this guy in full plate mail as you are running. In fact, rolling. As long as you don't get a one, you can carry him. And you have advantage on this.

[PFT Commenter]

I got a 17.

[Tim]

17. You're already doing great. You're running.

[PFT Commenter]

I'm so strong.

[Greg]

Would it be easier if I took off my plate?

[Tim]

No, you. That would take a long time to do. So actually would be. It would be slower.

[PFT Commenter]

Can Greg roll to see how tiny he feels in my arms?

[Tim]

Yes. 100. The higher you roll, the tinier you feel.

[Greg]

A six.

[PFT Commenter]

Six.

[Tim]

You actually feel pretty big. You feel. You feel strong. You feel he makes you feel stronger. Absolutely. And you are being carried as you run full speed now as both. First of all. Sure.

[PFT Commenter]

We're all jumping in, though. But I'm just holding, right?

[Tim]

Absolutely. So as all of us are running. Sure. That's just gonna swipe at you once. Ooh. Sharon is hitting you I'm sorry to say, as you run by and she goes, no, he's heading for the treasure. He wants the ax. And she hits you, unfortunately, for a total of nine, which becomes four damage against you. You shrugged.

[PFT Commenter]

Greg's fine. Right, Greg?

[Greg]

Am I okay?

[Tim]

Absolutely. Let me just make sure that wasn't against Greg. It was not.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Tim]

She went for Greg, you blocked the shot, and so you took the.

[PFT Commenter]

Say that again instead.

[Tim]

So she was going to hit Greg, but you moved your shoulder in the way, took the hit for Greg instead.

[Greg]

That is a turn on, to be quite honest.

[Tim]

You hero move might need to roll for it. But now I'll. I'll say you can declare that 100%.

[Greg]

I'd like to declare turned on.

[Tim]

Yes, you are officially turned on. Absolutely. You are down to 39 health left just below Erlik now, But you run to the edge, and that is when everybody who's looking over the edge can tell it is a significant drop down. You could jump down, but the problem is you don't currently see the bottom. And that includes the people who have dark vision. That goes out 60ft. So wherever the bottom is, whatever it is, it's further than 60ft down. Now, you could roll a perception check as a bonus action, if you want to see what might be down there before you jump, you could also roll an athletics check, try to grab a chain and then climb down the rest of the way and not risk any damage. But that would be the less.

[PFT Commenter]

Could I climb. If I climb down, can everyone get on my back?

[Tim]

Yes. 100%. Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

Let's climb down.

[Tim]

Everybody's going to be jumping onto you like a bunch of, like, mama raccoon with all the babies on.

[PFT Commenter]

But I'm holding Greg 100%.

[Tim]

Now, if everybody is grabbing on to you.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Tim]

I'm going to say that that gives you disadvantage. Okay, that's fine because you're raging. You always get advantage on your athletics checks. It cancels out. It's coming down to a single roll. 1d20 plus 5. But to climb down and more importantly, to catch yourself on the chain, you must get a 15 or higher.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, this is a significant role. Do you want to roll for me?

[Big Cat]

No.

[PFT Commenter]

You sure? Yeah, positive. I'm really nervous.

[Tim]

Let's get it 10 or higher on this.

[Greg]

10 or higher.

[PFT Commenter]

Can I.

[Max]

15? Wait, no.

[PFT Commenter]

10?

[Max]

Yeah.

[PFT Commenter]

10. Can. Can I get a kiss from anyone just to feel more confident?

[Tim]

Anyone?

[PFT Commenter]

I'll choose Greg.

[Greg]

Absolutely. Consent given.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Tim]

Absolutely. Now he gives you consent. Do you ask anything else?

[Big Cat]

It's the hottest thing you can do.

[PFT Commenter]

Can you give me an extra point so I can get a nice 9 or higher?

[Tim]

You could ask him for consent again now that you have it. If you do, I'll say you get double okay.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah, double consent.

[Greg]

You already know you have it.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Tim]

And because you knew you had it, but you asked for consent and drove him a little crazy, get an extra plus one on this. Now you only need a nine or higher on this roll.

[PFT Commenter]

Boys. Boys, here we go.

[Tim]

Power of foreplay. 13. 13 is enough. Well done. You grab onto the chain and you are able to start climbing down. And as you do, you think you see there's actually water at the bottom of here, which means you still would have taken damage, but not as much as you thought. But now you can climb down the chain, get into the water again if you want, and you realize you're in like this underground lake complex. You think the duer going nuts up there. They're shouting he's going for the treasure. And one of them shouts, should we. Should we go down? And the stepsister, Shredette says, no. Are you kidding me? You want to go down there with night scale? I'm not going down there. They can die. But that one Shredder, I'm going to miss him. Maybe I should help him. I'm gonna roll. And if she rolls low, she's gonna try to help. She wants to help save Erlik the Shredder. And so she is gonna try to jump as well. Please, Erlich, since she's under your control, roll me a D20 plus. She only has a plus three on this. And she also needs a 15, 11. 11 with a 14. She jumps to try to help you, and you hear her splash down into the water. I am sorry to say she is gonna take half of the falling damage, which would have been 80ft, would have been 8d6. She's gonna take 46 damage and she only has 5 hp left. I'm sorry to say already Sepsis is not dead, but she hits the water, she's knocked out immediately. And because she's in metal armor, she's sinking. And you know it. However, we think we notice that in this underground lake area, it's like a series of chambers underground. And in this lake, and there's one going to the south, there's one going to the north. And in the northern tunnel, we think we see an island emerging from out of the lake. Lake covered with treasure. And there seems to be an ax sticking out of the top of the treasure.

[Greg]

Boys, there's an island surrounded by miners.

[Tim]

There's this glittering treasure all around. And we think it's a very remote island, very hard to find. No, no cameras. You're not seeing anything. Not a lot of reporting. And so you are definitely seeing be. It is clearly the axe of Durgedon up ahead. Well done, Norm. That is going to bring us to Erlich's turn. Now, Erlich, what would you like to do?

[Hank]

How heavy is the axe?

[Tim]

The axe is heavy enough that it is difficult, but you could carry it.

[Hank]

More or less than £10.

[Tim]

Ooh, here's the thing. It is more than £10, but I understand what you're going for and I will let you roll an Arcana chapter to try to pick it up with a mage hand spell. Yes, absolutely. So you see suddenly from out of Erlik's hand, this glowing hand flies out towards the axe. I would like you to please roll a D20 plus your Arcana bonus if you can get a 15 or higher on this. Actually, only 13 or higher is all you need to pick up the axe and bring it wherever you want it to go. Oh no. What did he roll?

[PFT Commenter]

He got a one.

[Tim]

One.

[Big Cat]

Is that high enough?

[Tim]

Uh oh.

[Greg]

We all would have won if you rolled higher.

[Tim]

I am sorry to say that. Here's the thing. Your hand flies over to the axe, it grabs onto the axe, it picks up the axe and then starts to weaken a little bit. Like it can't do it. Even the ax just like phase through the hand a little. And as you're trying to pick it up, you're trying to pick it up, it dips down into the water a little bit. The hand flickers and then you think you feel something pull on like your hand. It's almost like a. Like a drone. Kind of like you're feeling something grabs the axe, pulls it down into the water. The axe is gone.

[PFT Commenter]

Oh, you.

[Tim]

That is into the water. And you're not sure if you just dropped it or it went through the hand or something grabbed it. It's hard to tell. And that was your action. Anything you want to do with your move or bonus?

[Big Cat]

Eric, apologize for your selfishness.

[PFT Commenter]

Maybe go get the can I use.

[Hank]

A skill or it's too late for that.

[Tim]

I let you try. What skill were you thinking?

[Hank]

I'd like to go stealths, cuz I feel like bad stuff's going to happen.

[Tim]

Yeah, that's a reasonable thing to do. I'll allow it. Roll me a D20 plus your stealth skill. Do you have the stealth skill?

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Hank]

Plus five.

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[Hank]

19.

[Tim]

19. Total or before the plus five.

[Hank]

Before the plus five.

[Tim]

Before the plus 5. 24. Ain't nobody noticing you right now. You are stealth. Not. This is an important detail and something we should remember going forward. Your teammates cannot see you right now. That is an important detail. You dive down to the wall water. No one knows where you are underwater. And you're really, like, in the corner of one of these caverns. If you want 100, Wayne, that is going to bring us to you next. What would you like to do?

[Big Cat]

Can you remind me what. What the powers of the ax were?

[Tim]

Oh, we knew. All we knew was that the the ax had immense power. I let you roll an arcana check to know, but we never got concrete answers on what the ax could do.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, just sounded like a cool thing.

[Tim]

It's a really powerful Superman power.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. So I can roll to see?

[Tim]

You certainly can, yeah. D20. Plus your Arcana bonus.

[Greg]

Feels like we should have very reasonable 100.

[Tim]

All right, now that's within sight. It's even easier. I would say die. Oh. Typically don't count if it falls on the floor. If you want to re roll that. Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Oh, it's only a seven. It's only seven plus four.

[Tim]

I'm sorry to say that you do not. All you know is it's the most valuable magic item you think you've ever seen.

[Hank]

I mean, we already came all the way down here. I think we're pretty committed at this point.

[PFT Commenter]

We got to get this ax.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Greg]

What if sucks? We'll turn around.

[Big Cat]

Yeah. Okay, so I know that Hank's invisible. Erlich's invisible.

[Tim]

Yes.

[Big Cat]

Can I still cast a spell on him?

[Tim]

You depends on the spell. Most spells you need to be able to see him to target him. What spell are you thinking?

[Big Cat]

I was thinking about doing the Bestow curse.

[Tim]

Oh. You need to touch him to do that, so, yes, you very much need to be able to see him on. Unfortunately. It's a good call, though. You could roll a perception check, and if you get a critical hit, you'd be able to find him.

[Big Cat]

I also have mage hand.

[Tim]

You do? Yeah.

[Big Cat]

Can I reach down into the water?

[Tim]

Try to find it 100%. Now, that would be an investigation check, which I let you use either investigate sleight of hand or arcana to see if you can find the axe in the water.

[Big Cat]

Okay. You said investigate Arcana or what? Yes, or sleight of hand. I'm a plus 5 on slide of hand.

[Tim]

Go ahead and roll that. See if you can find the axe.

[Big Cat]

D27.

[Tim]

Seven. Absolutely. With a seven. Five. You said you're fishing around in the water. You are not quite finding the axe. I am sorry to say. Not yet anyway. You can try again with your bonus action if you want.

[Big Cat]

What? What do you think, fellas?

[Hank]

Should we go after you're two right now?

[Big Cat]

Is there anything else I can do to get this action? What we're here for, what we're here for.

[Greg]

Just maybe get closer.

[Hank]

Well, we maybe see what it's all about again, dude, we can't.

[PFT Commenter]

I don't know who's talking right now. We can't even see this guy.

[Greg]

Does talking give up his location?

[Tim]

If he talks in character to us, we would immediately know where he is.

[Big Cat]

Well, that's what he just did.

[Tim]

I tried.

[Greg]

Can you roll to yell to him to try to trick him?

[Tim]

I'll let you roll a free perception check real quick. GC if you heard him talking to himself.

[Big Cat]

Okay. What was that?

[Tim]

It would be a perception check. And I'm really looking for a 20 or higher on this 20.

[Big Cat]

That's an 8.

[Tim]

Absolutely. I'm sorry to say he's still very hidden at the moment. You have your bonus action to either inspire somebody, do a healing word, or you could try to find the axe again.

[Big Cat]

I'm going to try to find it again.

[Tim]

Absolutely. Roll me another D29. Nine. Nine plus five. That's better than before with a 14.

[Max]

Okay.

[Tim]

The number I had been looking for was 13 or higher. You had gotten a 12 before. This time you passed it. Well done. Now, here's the thing. You grab the ax, you can feel through your own hand. Your. Your. There is a shaft that you are with your mage hand grabbing onto. Pretty girthy. And it feels magical, like an enchanted shaft.

[Big Cat]

Like, where's this feeling been all my life?

[Tim]

Yeah, exactly. It feels good. Good grip. And as you pull it up out of the water, the hand sort of comes up against something and you realize something else has got the ax. Roll one more time to see if you can pull it out of the water. If that's what you're trying to do. You got the ax, but now you gotta fight somebody for it. Ooh. Okay. How'd you do on that?

[Big Cat]

I only get a six, Tim.

[Tim]

Oh, six actually. This is surprising to them, actually. So you get to roll one more time.

[Big Cat]

That's a 12.

[Tim]

12. Okay, that's enough. You are pulling the axe out of the water, but what you are also pulling out of the water is the dragon who has grabbed onto the axe from below the water. This dragon has Black scales. The horns coming out of its head look like balrog horns that sweep forward in a radical way. And the duer upstairs begin to shout nightscale. He's here. They're trying to take the axe from him. And the dragon, Like a dog who's fighting you for a stick. Kind of around the stick starts to gay. Oh, take my fucking axe, will you? The due gave that to me for rent. I keep the rent that I get paid. Give up the axe. The treasure is mine and you can do whatever you want. What would you like to do? You say anything back to him or I say you.

[Greg]

Oh, my God.

[Tim]

Absolutely. 100% Absolutely.

[Big Cat]

Business.

[Tim]

Absolutely. Now, Greg, you would be up next. What would would you like to do at this point? Night scale. The dragon looks very tough. This is obviously he's laying claim to this axe right now. We could absolutely try to fight the axe, grab it, run out with it if we really want to. Or we could try to escalate this and then we'd be turning this into a part three encounter.

[PFT Commenter]

Could you. Could you. Could you kiss anyone?

[Tim]

Certainly could.

[Greg]

I'll see if I have an action for that. But. But I would like to call the moth to save Shredette, please.

[Tim]

Absolutely. The moth.

[Greg]

Drowning. Shredded.

[Tim]

The moth dives down automatically. Roam be a D20. As long as it doesn't get a one. It finds shredt. And 12. Absolutely dives down, dives up out of the water with Shredt in its, like, limbs.

[Max]

Okay.

[Tim]

And throws Shredt onto his back. Shredette is now safe and unconscious, but no longer drowning. Well done.

[Greg]

I would like to kick Hank's girl off her flight.

[Tim]

Absol. Sorry, what? Oh, absolutely. You want to kick her off the moth, is that right? Yes. 100 back into the water. Yes, absolutely. You immediately, automatically just push her back into the water. 100. She sinks into the water once again. For just a moment, her eyes blinked open and she said, thank you. Brave splash back into the water. Well done.

[PFT Commenter]

Wonderful.

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[Greg]

And then I would like to do lay of hands on Norm.

[Tim]

Oh, yes. You can heal Norm by laying.

[Greg]

What part of him was.

[Tim]

Hurts upon him? What's that?

[Greg]

What part of him was.

[Tim]

It was his butthole. Yeah. Pretty wound.

[Greg]

Desperate times.

[Tim]

Absolutely. And you really. You think it's a bad wound, like you got to get up in there? You think? Absolutely, 100%. So you stick your hand up. You're not there yet. You're going to have to keep going a little bit and make sure your hand gets up there further. You are Able to activate your healing magic. It feels like the best aloe vera you ever felt. In fact you think you're going to be regular for the next year. It's going to feel real good. You're going to be like nice solid chunks. And you are one absolutely able to give him 20 points of your lay on hands healing which gets him right up to full hit points in that case. Awesome. And that does eat up your action. So good turn Greg. And that will bring us to hippo maximus next. Bo Maximus. What would you like to do?

[Max]

I'm gonna need you to remind me things that I could be doing right now.

[Tim]

100. You've got your nature. You've got animal forms you can turn into. Right now the issue is the dweg are upstairs. You're just scared. Down here. It's shredt in the water and a dragon who is properly speaking supposed to be part three of this. And we might just need to grab this ax and run away and screw the dragon over completely.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Max]

Could I, could I turn into a hunter shark?

[Tim]

You certainly am. 100% absolutely. Yeah.

[Greg]

You've been holding out so much on us.

[Tim]

100% absolutely. Yes. So hunter shark you turn into your aquatic morph. Well done. You turn to this bash hunter shark and you are just about the same size as this dragon. You're pretty sure underwater now you can see clearly and you can tell that you can see the lower body body like jaws style of this dragon as it is fighting for the axe that is hovering above the water line. What would you like to do? You could dive out of the water. Literally jump the shark and you can grab onto the axe or you can bite onto the dragon on the nards or you can do whatever you want.

[Max]

I'm going to go for the ax.

[Tim]

Actually going for the axe.

[PFT Commenter]

Get this axe.

[Greg]

Get out of here.

[Tim]

You're completely surprising the dragon. Cuz the dragon is above water. Doesn't see you coming. So go ahead and roll 2d 20s + 5 for the athletics of the hunter shark form which is what you use. And I'll tell you right now the number you need to beat. I give the dragon disadvantage on this is only a 10 total. That's all I have.

[Max]

Two.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Tim]

And you have advantage. You need a 10 or high.

[Max]

Come on.

[Tim]

So as long as one of them's five or higher you're good. Good.

[Max]

That would be a 19. 19.

[Tim]

Amazing. Then just roll one more time. Since you get a second roll. Let me know if you get a critical hit. But otherwise you're still getting a lot with a 19 here. 16. 16 then specifically what you'd get with a 19 five for the hunter shark is you dive up into the air through the air, grab the axe out of the hand and out of the dragon's mouth completely. Actually you can roll and try to hold on to the ax but you would need a critical hit to beat him at this point. Making sure 1212 is not enough. You grab the ax from both of them, you dive down to the water and that is when and I promise you all, I am not making this up just to give you this opportunity Max that you notice that they as you dive down so deep you weren't expecting to find anything deep down there. You're just trying to get away from the dragon. You notice there is a tunnel that goes underwater and just from your shark senses being able to sense in this water like the smells and environmental changes, it leads out of the mountain entirely to the lake next door to the mountain. You could easily go through this water tunnel with the axe in your grip and you would be able to escape.

[Big Cat]

So you're saying that all of us dragon hunter found the crack.

[Max]

That one went over my head.

[Tim]

But yeah.

[Greg]

Is the dragon going to be an issue?

[Tim]

The dragon is no longer an issue for you. If you fly through, sail through that.

[Greg]

Tunnel, maybe help us out.

[Max]

Yeah. Can I, can I bring some shredders you can grab?

[Tim]

I would say because you got a 24 on your athletics, not only you notice this tunnel, you can have everyone just like Norm did grab onto your.

[PFT Commenter]

Fins or you should grab a everyone you can see.

[Tim]

That's true.

[Max]

Yeah. Oh right. Cuz I can't find one of the shredders. Find him then he's got to stay.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Big Cat]

That's a good thing. Cuz like sharks, a shark would eat a turtle.

[Max]

Oh my gosh.

[PFT Commenter]

Saving all the shredders you can see will hop on.

[Tim]

You grab all the shredders you can see. You don't grab any shredders you don't see. Were any shredders calling out for help to try to escape.

[PFT Commenter]

Skate just making sure couldn't hear him, right?

[Big Cat]

I was.

[Hank]

Yeah.

[Tim]

You think you hear a shredder you didn't see calling out. Do you go to that voice or.

[Max]

No. We're going to leave that shredder. All the shredders I can see though, they're. They're hopping off.

[PFT Commenter]

Yeah.

[Tim]

With a critical hit you could have gotten to that shredder. But I think without a. A natural 20 you can only grab these shredders Shredder code.

[PFT Commenter]

We only grabbed shredders we can see.

[Tim]

I feel like I'm watching Ninja turtles again. All these shredders. And you were absolutely able to have everyone grab onto your fins and tail. You go out of the secret tunnel that is the dragon's way into an out of this mountain. Because he's an aquatic dragon, eventually he will try to find us. But we're too fast for this Dragon. Dragon. And with your athletics check of 24 total, you get to the lake, change back, we all spill onto the shore, and sure enough, you can bring the ax back with you to town. And you have complete question.

[Big Cat]

Tim.

[Tim]

Yes.

[Big Cat]

So after we get out of the water, does Greg, does he need mouth to mouth?

[Tim]

Probably. I can hold a bunch of water. Anyone who is just a human would need strong, strong people.

[PFT Commenter]

Strong people can do it.

[Tim]

Strong people would be the best.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay. All right. I'd like to save mouth.

[Greg]

Who cast the spell that puts my mouth on my dick.

[Tim]

Oh, I think. I think that's what happens if you heal your. Your wounds in a certain way. You did like the ogre when his dick fell off. You healed his dick. So obviously we can switch dicks around and stuff. I think that'll be the. Yeah, absolutely. And so bringing the axe back with you, you are able to lay claim to the axe and you have succeeded at the adventure the forge of fury. And you did it in two sessions, which is only one group of awls was able to do it. Maybe two groups was able to do it in just two sessions.

[Big Cat]

Also, follow up, what would happen to. To a turtle that was left in the lake with an angry dragon who's mad that his ass.

[Tim]

Real quick. I'll let one turtle roll just to see. Oh, with a natural one.

[Greg]

Oh, no.

[Tim]

You live and live on in that.

[Hank]

And I can just go and save my girl.

[Tim]

The dragons hunting. You go back to the stepsister and the two of you can like retire. She's charmed. You can keep her charmed. That's kind of grim, but yeah, absolutely poisoned. And you would essentially, if you have control of her with charm, you'd kind of take over the duer a little. A little bit. But unfortunately they don't have the axe.

[PFT Commenter]

Anymore to go back and kill the duers.

[Tim]

The dragon's really mad also because natural.

[Greg]

Inclination to avoid scales.

[Hank]

But I can convince the dragon to go get the ax back.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay. Well, that was incredible.

[Tim]

Good adventure. We all made it to the end. Absolutely.

[Big Cat]

We're all together.

[Tim]

Yeah, we're all together. That's all the important thing do we wanted to Everyone wanted the axe. Is one person getting the axe or are we all great? We said we share the axe.

[PFT Commenter]

Shredders always share the axe and turtles.

[Tim]

I'm forgetting basic shredder information. I feel so silly. It's a lot to keep track of. So well done. You share the axe and you are winning the day. Well done, everybody.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay, so, Tim, I had one that was so much fun. I have a roback question.

[Tim]

Question. Absolutely.

[PFT Commenter]

Rho b a-k.com promo code take 20 off first purchase. Q, zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts, robot. Question. I saw you. You've been doing games for a bunch of awls.

[Tim]

Yes.

[PFT Commenter]

Have they been flying you out?

[Tim]

Oh, yes. Yeah, I was just two weeks ago. I've gone to other places and cities around here. I think there are some AWS in Chicago who have brought me out, actually. So I always try to sync up with them. But, yeah, it is. So I will just, just say that, like, I. I love running games for AWS. I think at this point, 50% of my clients are like, AW. It is so rad. Because what I do is now that I've, like, run Forge of Fury, I've been running another adventure for them. So next time I see you guys, I'm going to have to run that adventure that they've all been playing. So far, I think, like, maybe 25 groups have done this next adventure I've got planned. Once I run it for you, I have to retire it and then start a new adventure for the AWL soon. So they kind of move through seasons, kind of. And if you want to get in on the current season before we play again on the podcast, now is your only chance. Once I run on the podcast, it has to get retired.

[PFT Commenter]

Okay.

[Tim]

And I will also be at some conventions in Indianapolis and the Origins convention in Columbus and one in Orlando. Yes, I might see you there. Absolutely. So I always tell awls, if you want a discounted game with me, I'll be running games games there. So especially if you're already going to that convention, please say hi to me. If nothing else. And just for people who are in New York, I am running after school programs in New York, and currently we are looking for more schools to expand into. But so if you have, like, young people who are looking for a D and D club at their school, I'm providing that in New York and in other areas. And if you are a dungeon master who is looking to Dungeon master for kids, we actually need more Dungeon Masters. I love that.

[Big Cat]

I think we. We should go to one of these conventions.

[PFT Commenter]

Where's the indie one?

[Tim]

Yeah, the Indianapolis one is Gen Con. It is the biggest Dungeons and Dragons convention in the world. And if you guys were there, I could take you on the whole tour. That's my stomping ground.

[PFT Commenter]

When is it?

[Tim]

It is in August. End of August.

[Big Cat]

Yeah, we're going to that also.

[Tim]

At some point. I mean, convention. Yes, 100%, because I got to show you what those are like. Also. LARP. LARPing at some point.

[PFT Commenter]

Yes.

[Tim]

This is my LARPing kit and I haven't gotten a lot very much at all. But the people who LARP make me look like a casual hardcore.

[PFT Commenter]

Will they be larping in Indy?

[Tim]

There will be people in costumes in Indy 100, including myself.

[Big Cat]

We gotta get kind of wild at these conventions.

[Tim]

Yeah, definitely. Yeah, absolutely.

[PFT Commenter]

All right. Well, Tim, you're the best.

[Tim]

We love you all so much.

[PFT Commenter]

And thank you him for listening.

[Tim]

Absolutely.

[Big Cat]

Love you guys.

[PFT Commenter]

That was great.

[Tim]

Great.

[PFT Commenter]

Great job, guys. Okay, let's wrap up the show.

[Tim]

Numbers five, one.

[PFT Commenter]

33.

[Tim]

Ah, three.

[PFT Commenter]

11. Chasing you memes.

[Big Cat]

What you say, Max?

[Max]

11.

[PFT Commenter]

Why 11?

[Max]

I always do 11.

[Tim]

Oh, thought Shane does 11.

[Max]

No, I've done. I've done like past 30 times.

[Hank]

Shane is 2118.

[Big Cat]

Jake Marsh.

[PFT Commenter]

Very cool, Mar.

[Big Cat]

Very cool, Jake.

[PFT Commenter]

Very cool. All right, we'll see everyone Monday with Ryan Rosillo.

[Big Cat]

Love you guys.

[PFT Commenter]

It.