B (5:52)

This is what gets right to the heart of my relationship with some of my priest friends who get invited up into the higher echelons of church hierarchy. They go up into the groups of.

A (6:03)

The cool kids, and then that causes.

B (6:06)

Me to sometimes resent them.

A (6:08)

That's not good.

B (6:10)

That's not fair. It's not just.

A (6:13)

It's my wound because he wants me to be one that leads in. In freedom and with his own heart. So he wants to heal the part of me that resents leaders because I myself am called to be one. So for me, I'm giving this example to say I recognize that this is where I find it hard to trust God sometimes when he's speaking a word to me, right? If today you hear his voice, harden not your hearts. Sometimes. He's speaking to me through Father Mike Schmitz. He's speaking to me through Dr. Scott Humm. He's speaking to me through the chosen. And I find I harden my heart sometimes because I'm like, these are the cool kids. That's a wound that I have that you might not have. It doesn't mean that you have more faith because you listen to them. But I'm realizing it's just because to me, I receive them sometimes like a blow upon a bruise. Look how well they embrace their own leadership role. Why don't you. And why don't you allow me to speak to you through them? Is it merely because they are popular? So this is where, you know, by giving this example, I'm trying to help you to identify where you might say, yeah, this is where I find that tough, find it hard to trust Him. So again, this is faith, not as a quantity thing, but as a yes or no in every circumstance thing.

B (7:35)

You know, in the first reading we heard the rash one has no integrity, but the just one, because of his faith shall live. And the word rash means like just acting rashly, just according to my emotions. And that man has no integrity, nothing keeping those emotions united. And the emotions, which are good things, become like useless servants. As Jesus said in the Gospel, they become like useless servants unless there's a faith to unite them and wield them for good. So that I can cry with someone who might be sad and I can rejoice with someone who might be happy and that I'm not determined by my emotions. And I can even do the difficult thing when I might not feel like it.

A (8:21)

So I'm learning that at times I have a particular emotional reaction to certain people or certain events that make it difficult for me to trust or have faith in Christ. I still believe in God and all that, but I say, I don't know if I can follow you there or let you speak a word to me through this circumstance or this person. But you see how it's a lot to do with my own root system. So by identifying a strong emotional reaction to something that makes it difficult for us to have faith in Christ, then following it down to its roots in prayer or with the help of the holy spirit that St. Paul speaks about in the second reading, Timothy one of.

B (9:02)

His beloved who became like a son to him. He said, timothy, don't be ashamed of your testimony to the Lord. When you feel embarrassed sometimes because you find it hard to be really faithful in tough times and you think I'm just a hypocrite, maybe I should give up altogether. Don't be ashamed, he says. He says, you have not received a spirit of cowardice. You've received a spirit of power, which is God's own power of love, which is doing what is right for God and your neighbor, and of self control, which means doing the right thing even when you might not feel like it.

A (9:37)

That, I think, is the. Is the invitation to a new freedom that the readings this week are holding out to us, and also a freedom or ability to be understanding of one another in a new way. And here's a story that I shared at Mass this weekend as well. Driving upstate with my sister while she was actually driving in a snowstorm to go back to college, because we both went to college in upstate New York while she was driving, she's trying to stay in the tracks of the car in front of us.

B (10:08)

She says, oh, no. And I said, what? And she says, we're sliding, we're sliding. And the car started to spin in the snow. And I mention it because there was that time when I was with her when she said, oh no, she was feeling something, but I didn't know what she was feeling. And she felt it before. And then I got wrapped up in it, and all I can do is try to be understanding of the fact that she was feeling what she was feeling and she couldn't really control it right now. And then we kissed the guardrail and the car stopped. And I got out of the car and I said, I'll drive Strong man to the rescue. And I drove us the rest of the way. But I mention it because, you see, there's a. There's also people in our lives who are reacting to Something because of the way that they feel before the situation. Although we might not feel the same way.

A (11:00)

Like, I didn't feel the slide that she did before I felt anything. She felt it. And then next thing you know, like, I'm in this experience with her, I'm spinning with her. So I think it's just good to be aware that each one of us is reacting to life uniquely, according to our own soil, upbringing, complicated root system, whatever you want to say. And Christ is with each one of us to help us in the way that is unique and particular to us, to our own heart, which he knows, right? He's the word through whom the Father created us. He knows all the rooms in our heart and he knows how to give us the healing that we need. The question is, you know, will we allow Him? And we mentioned St Faustina yesterday too, because it was her feast day. And she's the saint who saw Jesus in prayer and was entrusted with the divine mercy devotion. Have an image painted of what you see before you, Jesus said to her, and underneath it write the words, jesus, I trust in you. So she did that. Now, the thing with Saint Faustina that's important to know is her huge fear was to be entrusted with things. She was full of self doubt. And in her diary she speaks about her own upbringing, her own complicated root system. So when Christ comes to her to entrust the divine mercy devotion to her.

B (12:25)

That is precisely how God healed her, by entrusting her with responsibility, the way.

A (12:33)

That he entrusted the announcement of his resurrection to Mary Magdalene, you know, to proclaim to the world that Christ's body is resurrected, being entrusted with the privilege of anointing that body for death. Mary Magdalene, the one who used her body not to glorify God, but merely to try to soothe her emotional pain before life. Can you imagine her own root system? But just as she was entrusted with the announcing of the resurrection of the body, Faustina was entrusted with announcing to the world the divine mercy of God who works in and through our wounds. That's at the heart of this devotion. Look at the picture of Jesus, the divine mercy. You see where the rays of light and grace are coming from? They're coming from his wounds. From his wounds. So this isn't meant to reduce our Christian faith to what is sometimes called, in a derogatory way, psychobabble. This is to acknowledge the real psychological effect and emotional effect that our past has on us and helps us by following some of this stuff down to its roots, to open our hearts to healing in the places where we need healing to give Christ permission to those places in our hearts. You go to the doctor and he says, where does it hurt? And you go to the doctor and you're like, I, I don't know. I just have a general sense that I should be here. Okay, well, here we go. Let's start, you know, let's do some trial and error, I guess, you know. But when we come to Christ too, it's like he says, what do you want me to do for you? Where does it hurt? Do we even know how to answer that question? So I hope you find something like this helpful. This to me has opened up all sorts of new possibilities because I feel capable now of, of overcoming my initial emotional reaction to life and saying, I know what this is. I'm reacting this way because of. And then try to follow it down to its roots. And yet, alright, come Lord Jesus, come Holy Spirit, come into my heart and.

B (14:42)

Then look at it with Christ and open up the heart like a little crack, like the thief on the cross with faith the size of a mustard seed. And he will enter into that why and bring you right down to its roots. And then real healing can begin.

A (14:59)

I just want to end, though, with something that was said to me by a young man after the 10 o' clock mass. I mentioned this at the 12. It was a good reminder. He said, you know, Father, you mentioned the problems you have with the cool kids or the popular group, all that stuff. And he said, you know, I know what you mean by that. But also it's. It's a good thing to want to be loved or to want to belong. So I think it comes from a good place. And I really appreciate that because it was a reminder that if we do go down deep enough to the very root of our being, which is where God creates us and the person he formed us to be, which is where our vocation is our calling. It's good. All the desires he puts in our heart are good. You know, it's just that things happen to us, traumatic things happen to us that lead us to try to fulfill the desire in a disordered way, or afraid to try to fulfill the desire in that way because we got hurt down that road once before, stuff like that. But the desire itself is good. And it helped me to realize, yeah, you know, even as I speak these words from my own experience, I doing so as a public person in front of a church full of people, as a leader in a community that is well known as the most popular body of believers in the world, which is the Catholic Church, which is why everybody cares about what Pope Leo says, and no one even knows the leader of, say, like, the Lutheran Church or the Methodist Communion. Everyone knows Pope Leo, though, right? So here I am, like a representative of the most popular body of Christians in the world. Fine. And in fact, good, because I wouldn't want what happened to me, in my experience of the popular groups in the past, to get the better of me, but rather, if I can plant the reality of who I am in the sea of his mercy even now, to become the man he made me to be. Sam.