Under Wraps

Summary

Pod Meets World – "Under Wraps" (September 30, 2025)

Podcast: Pod Meets World
Hosts: Will Friedle & Sabrina Bryant
Episode Theme: A comedic, nostalgic deep-dive into the very first Disney Channel Original Movie (DCOM), Under Wraps (1997), as part of their ongoing Disney Channel rewatch series.

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Main Theme & Purpose

Will and Sabrina tackle Under Wraps, the film that officially kicked off the DCOM era in 1997, ushering in a new wave of family-friendly original movies. They recap the plot, analyze the surprisingly edgy content for a ‘kids’ movie, discuss standout (and bizarre) characters, and dissect why Under Wraps remains such an odd and pivotal entry in Disney Channel history. Along the way, they sprinkle in anecdotes, critique 90s parenting tropes, marvel at the unusual scripting choices, and revel in DCOM nostalgia, all with their trademark sarcastic banter.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Historical Significance of “Under Wraps” [04:17]

• Under Wraps was the very first Disney Channel Original Movie, aired in October 1997.
• It set a template for DCOMs, especially the strong association between Disney Channel and Halloween content.

  "DCOM and Halloween have become a synonymous pair over the years, and Under Wraps is a massive reason why." (Will, 05:00)

• Originally shot in Chico, CA during a sweltering summer, on a shoestring budget with a “hungry team” inspired by E.T. but aiming for a child-safe horror.

2. Casting & Crew Deep Dive [09:58]

• Directed by Greg Beeman, a DCOM staple who also did Brink, Horse Sense, Miracle in Lane 2, and more.
• Headlined by Mario Yadidia (as Marshall)—his last major acting work; Adam Wylie (as Gilbert)—becomes a noted TV actor; Clara Bryant (as Amy), later becomes an attorney; Bill Fagerbakke (as Harold the Mummy and known as Patrick from SpongeBob).
• Will and Sabrina recount Bill’s struggles almost passing out in the mummy costume due to the California heat:

  "He almost passed out numerous times while in the mummy costume. Isn’t that crazy?" (Will, 14:21)

3. Is “Under Wraps” Too Scary, or Just Too Weird? [07:19]

• Initial scenes are noted as uncharacteristically intense for Disney—family horror bordering on actual horror.
• Sabrina found the beginning scarier than the rest but insisted, “No, no, it wasn’t scary at all. Inappropriate at some times, but not scary.” [07:19]
• Both discuss that, at several points, the movie “rides the line” and could easily have gone too far for Disney standards.

4. 90s Parenting and Lawlessness [24:04, 43:03, 76:02]

• Much focus is given to the depiction of unsupervised children, dangerous behavior, and a total lack of parental awareness.
• Sabrina: “They seem very young to be by themselves... even at the movie theater with mom not in the back row, then walking home by themselves at night.” [43:03]
• Will notes the kids commit actual felonies—breaking into houses, museums, etc.—with Sabrina chiming in, “Bad choice after bad choice after very, very bad choices.” [29:54]

5. Amy: The Wildest DCOM Character Ever [27:48, 62:34]

• Amy, portrayed with unnerving worldliness and meanness, is called the most bonkers DCOM character ever.
• She discusses bras, cracks suicide (“open a vein”) jokes, and claims to sleep in the nude.
• Sabrina: “She’s a good actor. It’s just not a DCOM [character]." [28:53]; Will: “They wrote a 40-year-old divorcee and just went: make her 12.” [67:11]

Notable Quotes:

• “Three kids accidentally awaken a 3000 year old mummy who they name Harold and must hide him away while trying to return him to his lover before Halloween night.” (Will, 09:58 – film synopsis)
• Amy suicide joke: “Oh my God, your aunt must want to open a vein.” (Amy, 48:31)
  Will: “It is our very first… Disney Channel suicide joke. You can click it off the map.” [49:05]
• Amy’s worldliness: “I sleep in the nude.” (Amy, 53:36)
  Will: “The 11 or 12 year old girl talking about how she sleeps in the nude—this was bananas...” [54:18]
• Will on Amy: “Somebody needs to get to Amy because something’s going on” [69:32]

6. Strange Adult Themes in a “Kids” Movie [42:40, 75:06]

• Repeated sexual innuendo, references to murder, adult relationship drama, and a Halloween party hinting at... swinging?
• Will and Sabrina both question how these elements made it past network censors, reiterating that Under Wraps is not even available on Disney+.
  • “I would be calling Disney Plus and being like, I need my money back... I can now not trust Monroe to be browsing around—Mommy, what does it mean to sleep in the nude?” (Sabrina, 54:47)
  • “What is this party? There's a haunted mansion, but also probably an orgy room? What is this?” (Will, 76:02)

7. Plot Recap Highlights [19:47–83:01]

• Movie-within-a-movie fakeout start, establishing a meta-horror tone.
• Creepy neighbor Kubot (who later turns out to be the villain) and his attack dog; fake death and “mob boss” twist.
• The trio’s escalating felonies—breaking into Kubot’s house and a museum, kidnapping, and grand theft.
• “Harold” the mummy’s gentle, comedic journey—his hunger, horror at modern life, and (notably) peeing on screen—a first for a DCOM.
• Bizarre, laugh-out-loud moments: the drive-thru order ($3.74 for burgers, fries, and soda), Harold’s skateboarding chase, and his emotional catharsis with “All By Myself” on repeat.
• Emotional ending: Harold’s farewell, closing the circle on lost love—and Marshall letting go of his own fears about his mother’s remarriage.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments (with Timestamps)

• On the DCOM legacy:
  “Under Wraps is a massive reason why DCOM and Halloween have become a synonymous pair.” (Will, 05:00)

• Amy’s most notorious line:
  “I sleep in the nude.” (Amy, 53:36)
  Will: “The 11 or 12 year old girl talking about how she sleeps in the nude—this was bananas to me.” [54:18]

• On the film’s tonal whiplash:
  “We just never, ever get that in the movies... it just caused for a very not great feeling as I was watching.” (Sabrina, 92:27)

• On Disney+ not carrying the film:
  “You would think it would be found on Disney Plus... But no, shockingly, the first DCOM is not on Disney. Can you believe that?” (Will, 08:10)

• Reviewing the strange “Halloween party”:
  “It’s supposed to be small-town America in the mid-90s, which is a little safer, I guess. It wasn’t really.” (Will, 43:36)

  “The party is weird. Really, really weird. Like swingers weird.” (Will, 71:29)

• Summing up Amy’s character:
  “They wrote like a 40-year-old divorcee and just went, ‘just make her 12’.” (Will, 67:11)
  “Amy needs… She’s got a God-sized hole. Somebody needs to get to Amy, because something’s going on.” (Will, 69:32)

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Important Timestamps for Key Segments

• Intro to Under Wraps & DCOM history: 04:17–09:58
• Cast/Crew & 90s Disney trivia: 09:58–14:21
• Film “scariness” debated: 07:19–08:10
• Amy’s inappropriate jokes and banter: 48:31–49:24, 53:36–54:47, 62:34–63:29
• Child lawlessness, 90s parenting, paper routes: 24:04–25:47; 43:03–44:24
• The wild Halloween party: 71:00–76:20
• Plot Recap: Throughout, especially 19:47–83:01
• One-star and five-star reviews: 87:08–88:02
• Horror movie ranking game: 88:02–92:09
• Sabrina’s “Sees” (noticing odd plot bits and party issues): 92:20–94:47
• Final Ratings and Wrap-up: 94:47–99:56

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Hosts’ Ratings & Reflections

• Both hosts agree: Under Wraps is an entertaining, irreverent watch... but utterly bizarre as a DCOM. They rate it a “5 out of 10 45-year-old divorcee characters played by 11 year old girls” (Will & Sabrina, 98:24), noting that as a generic 90s kids’ movie, it’s fun, but as a DCOM it is wildly off-brand.
• Sabrina: “I didn't actually hate the movie. I hated it for a DCOM… But I didn't hate it, which is weird.” [95:55]

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Tone and Language

• Language is playful, nostalgic, and heavily sarcastic, lampooning some of the film's more outrageous choices.
• The tone is conversational and laughs often come at the expense of the film’s bizarre 90s scripts, parenting, and character oddities—especially Amy.

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Conclusion

Will and Sabrina close by reiterating Under Wraps's unique place in DCOM history: a franchise-starter (that’s not even on Disney+), chock-full of edgy 90s dialogue and questionable life lessons. The hosts are both aghast and amused by its content, recommend it for DCOM fans seeking to relive a “what were they thinking” cinematic curiosity, and tease their next Halloween-themed rewatch (Twitches Too). They share a preview of their interview with Adam Wylie (Gilbert) and encourage listeners to subscribe for more magical rewinding.

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For Listeners Considering a Watch:

Under Wraps is a riotously off-kilter time capsule—not for the easily scandalized, but perfect for DCOM completists with a love for 90s absurdity, Halloween, and the weirdest "child-friendly" nostalgia trip you'll have all season.

Transcript

[Sabrina Bryant]

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[Sabrina Bryant]

Hey Will.

[Will Fried]

So I just got. Well as you got as the world got. Get ready, everybody. Cuz I guess it's official. Camp Rock 3 is filming. And our producers are already going crazy about the grainy pictures coming out. Who's going to be in it, what's going to happen? Unbelievable.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I'm here for it. I want you to know it's like a Hell yeah for me. Hell yeah.

[Will Fried]

Well, you know the thing that I read about this, which is. Which is interesting, is there was. There's a. Something that was leaked from Disney by accident that said Camp Rock 3. It's actually. It's a combination of, you know, music and dance, the way they have it. But also Hunger Games where they all kill each other off.

[Sabrina Bryant]

They're getting killed off.

[Will Fried]

Only one Jonas lives. That's the whole camp. Camp Rock 3. One Jonas makes it. That's what it's called, Will. Yeah. I didn't do this. This is Disney.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I'm with the millions and millions of Magical Rewind that people that can't wait to see.

[Will Fried]

First of all, I love that you think we have millions and millions of dollars.

[Sabrina Bryant]

No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. But I am with them going, they better not kill any one of those. Amazing. My heart could take it. My heart.

[Will Fried]

Three Jonas enter. One Jonas leaves. That's Camp Rock 3, people. No, I couldn't imagine. But yes, it's true. While I might have made up that last part, it is true. Guys, big news in the world of the dcom. But before we get to what will be the newest dcom, we gotta get to the first dcom. Yes. What a great transition. My God, I'm good at this. Welcome back to Magical Rewind, the show that makes you want to grab your friends, your PJs and your popcorn and go back to a time when all the houses were smart. The wave tsunamis. And there was one Jonas left. I'm Will Fried.

[Sabrina Bryant]

L. And I'm Sabrina Bryant.

[Will Fried]

Yes. As the saying goes, you never forget your first time. And so we are entering a sarcophagus for the DCOM that started it all. 1997's under wraps. Diving headfirst again into an important time for the Disney Channel. That's the spooky season. You like that spooky voice? Give me your best spooky voice.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yes.

[Will Fried]

That'Ll work. We, of course, are talking about All Hallows Eve. Halloween, the weeniest of all hallows. The movie debuted on October 25, 1997, just before Halloween, and was the beginning of a total rebrand when it came to films for the studio introducing the term Disney Channel Original movie, or dcom, the marketing that changed the entire ball game. And the term DCOM is so beloved, it pretty much become the common branding for any movie that the channel has aired exclusively throughout all of time. It has become an all inclusive term. So even early, early movies are still being called DCOMs. But nope, this was the first one. And frankly, I'm a bit shocked because there's a lot of that went on in this movie that I was like.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Like literally, I, I mean, time and time again I just kept going. Did, did they just say that? Like, I mean, just so much. It's just unreal. It's. It. The evolution, I would say, is for the best.

[Will Fried]

There was a time where one character said one thing where I paused it, walked the length of my house to tell my wife exactly what this character said. And we will get into that. And I know you know exactly what I'm talking about. I know, but that happened a couple times. Yes. So we've already seen some of the most popular Halloween DCOM entries, both past and present. We have Halloween Town, twitches and zombies, just to name a few. DCOM and Halloween have become a synonymous pair over the years, and under wraps is a massive reason why. Yes, it's chocolate meets peanut butter. Peanut butter meets chocolate. Halloween meets Disney. Under wraps also marks a rare occurrence where the original film spawned a much later reboot and a sequel to that reboot, creating what Disney like to call a franchise. But we're talking years and years and years later and it can get a bit confusing because for some reason only those are on Disney plus we'll get into it. Shot in the very hot summer of 1996 in Chico, California, which remember that because it's going to come into play later. This was a new location for DCOM production. But then again, was it? If this was the first dcom, then it was the original location for DCOM production. It was filmed on a low budget, but they hired a hungry team looking to make a good quote, unquote, child friendly horror movie loosely inspired by ET and they did such a good job that some websites warn parents that despite being on the family friendly side and being on the family friendly Disney Channel, this movie involves a kids event that includes, quote, mild scares and spooky atmospheres. Unquote. Sabrina, was this movie too scary for kids? Was it scary for you? What did you do?

[Sabrina Bryant]

No, no, it wasn't scary at all. Inappropriate at some times, but not scary.

[Will Fried]

Not even for kids. Not even the start.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Okay. Yes, actually the start was, you're right, I need to get back on my timeframe here. Yet the beginning was, was a little. Oh, whoa, whoa. I mean, closer to a horror film than what I was expecting, I guess.

[Will Fried]

Yeah, they really rode the line of like one more shot and it would not have been able to be on like, Disney at all, honestly.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Absolutely. But I mean, throughout it though, I mean, it stopped being scary really at all after that. Even the heightened of the drama in it was like.

[Will Fried]

I agree.

[Sabrina Bryant]

This is definitely a kids Disney movie.

[Will Fried]

Yep. I agree. Many families have made viewing the original under wraps as an October slash Halloween tradition. So you would think it would be found on Disney plus, like I was saying. But no, shockingly, the first DCOM is not on Disney. Can you believe that? Only the new reboots are available to stream there. So you can watch it now on YouTube. Yes, it is horrible quality. I also, there's two of them there on YouTube. One of them says an hour and six minutes long. One of them says an hour AND 30 minutes long. The hour AND 30 minute one is the one you want to watch. And it's clearly better than the hour and six minutes. It's also, for some reason, 24 minutes longer. So, yes, it's free. So you can go watch that and feel free to watch it before we deep dive or peep it later after you've waddled into the shallow end. But do it fast, people, because summer's ended and the weather's turning. The pool's going to get cold very, very soon. Sabrina, what was your knowledge of the first E Comm ever under wraps before? A little podcast here with millions of listeners apparently.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I had no idea. So much that when it became what it was, which was a spooky season, I was shocked. I was like, oh, well, duh. That makes sense where we're at in the seasons of the world right now. But I was shocked. I had no idea. Under wraps. I thought maybe it was like a detective movie. I really had no idea when it came to the name of it. And then it made sense the name of it later on. Ashley.

[Will Fried]

Okay, yeah, no, I knew. I. I knew what this movie was because of this podcast and I think somebody had mentioned under wraps and mummies. That's the only reason I knew what it was about. All right, so, yeah, so I have.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Been talking about reviewing this one for a while now that.

[Will Fried]

Yeah, so it must be that because.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I. Yeah, but no, I had no idea there was going to be a mummy. I. I just kind of opened it up, watched it and went, okay, we're in Halloween season.

[Will Fried]

Yes, we are doing something with this. Yeah, there's no daddy, but there's definitely a mummy. Thank you very much. So why don't you rise from your tomb and pine for the queen? It's time for the synopsis. Three kids accidentally awaken a 3000 year old mummy who they name Harold and must hide him away while trying to return him to his lover before Halloween night. This movie is directed by Greg Beeman. That is a name we have heard many times. A seasoned name in Hollywood whose first jobs behind the camera were Magical World of Disney films. One was called the Little Spies and the other was a movie we have to do soon or my life will not be complete. The richest cat in the world. Yes, he would go on to direct movies like License to Drive, mom and dad, Save the World. Underrated movie in my opinion. And Problem Child three. But listen to this lineup for dcoms, people. These are the dcoms that bear his name under wraps. Brink, Horse Sense. Miracle in Lane two. The Ultimate Christmas Present. There is not a dud in the bunch. He'd go on to become a force in tv, both directing and executive producing shows like Heroes, Smallville, Nash Bridges and Falling Skies. As far as the cast goes, Under Wrap stars Mario Yadidia. I want to say is how you pronounce his name as Marshall. He by all definitions is the star. Mario was also seen in the movie Jack with Robin Williams, but that's about it. Under Wraps was basically his last project, which is something we've not really seen before. Kid did two movies and bounced. Adam Wiley is Gilbert. He's best known as Zachary brock on the 90s TV show Picket Fences, but he has worked a ton over the years. As a kid he's in movies like Child's Play 2 and Kindergarten Cop and basically appeared in every TV show you've ever seen, from Seinfeld to who's the Boss to Living Single to Boy Meets World. And as an adult, you've seen him in Castle, Shake it up and Miami. But most notably he appeared in the 2022 under wraps reboot. It's a fun little Easter egg for the fans of the original. Ken Campbell is Bruce. Ken is a recognizable character actor seen in things like Armageddon, Groundhog Day, Seinfeld Again, and Coyote Ugly. And in an episode of Girl Meets World as well, he played Jingles the Clown. But our listeners will know him the best as the just relieved mall Santa that Kevin Callister runs into with a message for the real Santa in Home Alone in the Ken is still working today. Most recently heard as the voice on the animated series Adventures in Wonder Park. Clara or Clara, I think it's Clara Bryant is Amy. Clara had appeared on Roseanne and Buffy the Vampire Slayer. But most importantly for this podcast, she's in the dcom True Confessions. Her last credit was in 2007, and I recognized her from True Confessions but couldn't figure where and so I did a little Google on her. She is now an attorney.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Wow.

[Will Fried]

Isn't that great? Yes. She left the business entirely after being a child actor, went to law school and is a practicing attorney. Corrine Bohr. I'm hoping I say that right, but I'm sure I am not. It's probably Corinne Bahar. It's. I think it's Karine Bore plays Marshall's mom. She starred in Police Academy 4. Citizens on patrol. Underrated Citizens on Patrol. Police Academy movie. Yes. I'm saying that right because it is an underrated movie. For Police Academy three was okay. Four was pretty good. And she was also in the movie Zapped. But to us, she's just Julie in Phantom of the Megaplex. She has since appeared on TV shows like Murder She Wrote, Party of Five, Veronica Mars, and Grey's Anatomy. And the legendary Bill Fraggerbacki plays Harold the Mummy. Bill first hit mainstream as assistant Coach Dawber on Coach, but will always be the voice of Patrick Starr on SpongeBob SquarePants. You want to hear something really crazy?

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yes.

[Will Fried]

I've never once seen an episode of SpongeBob SquarePants.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah. That is crazy, right?

[Will Fried]

I've never seen and I've never. I hear it's amazing. And Tom Kenny's a great guy and a friend, and I've never ever seen an episode of SpongeBob SquarePants.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I get little snippets here because it plays on my recordings before my friends episodes that I record every single one of. That's crazy.

[Will Fried]

I know.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I might have ever seen it. Really? Honestly, that much, too. I wasn't a big fan, which I know is, like, crazy. I just wasn't. Catch my eye.

[Will Fried]

Yeah. By the way, SpongeBob SquarePants, because it's so big, is pretty much all you need for this man's career. But he still does a ton of voiceover roles. I've gotten a chance to work with him several times. He's a very nice guy.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I love him. And Coach, too. He was a great character.

[Will Fried]

He's great. He's. He is a true legend and someone who went through a ton of pain for this role or roles since they filmed in the California summer heat. He almost passed out numerous times while in the Mummy costume. Isn't that crazy? But enough preamble. Let's get to what really matters. The runtime, people. That's all that matters in any of these films. Under wraps is 95 minutes. Oh, man. And I was just starting to love this film. That is five minutes over the target and we are in what many would call a dead zone. No matter what's in the movie, the scariest part of Under Wraps is that you have to sit for more than an hour and a half. Boo to everyone involved. May you get a hangnail. What were you going to say, Sabrina?

[Sabrina Bryant]

A double. A double hit too. Especially when you're looking on YouTube and you're like, oh, it's only an hour. Then it's like, no, nope, it's an hour and 35 minutes. Damn it.

[Will Fried]

Yes. So it could have been a great movie. Now it can only, even if it's the best movie ever, can only be good. And it's written by Don Reimer, a prolific writer, starting in TV with shows like Coach Again, Evening Shade and Carolina City, but eventually crafting movies like all the Big Mama's House films, Surf's up and Rio. Reimer, unfortunately passed away in 2012 and was only 51 years old.

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[Will Fried]

And now wrap me in bandages and call me Harold. We are entering the horror that is now known as under wraps. The movie opens with a little stop motion over parchment paper and what can be seen as the bandages from a mummy. There's a. A sarcophagus, a spider, a snake, and the hand of. Well said mummy. The viewers know right off the bat we're in for a little bit of Halloween fun. And then we're thrown right into it. Spooky music and a young boy named Ben pushing around his food on a dinner plate. His dad sternly states that Ben must sleep in his own room tonight. His mean big sister calls him a baby because he thinks a monster lives in his closet. So let's go really quickly and add her to the crappy dcom siblings list. And we're not even two minutes in. Good news is he tells her to shut up and calls her a cow. There's a lot of mean. Like, in this whole movie. There's just insult after insult after insult. It is the mid-90s, people. This is how we spoke to each other. Ben swears the monster's real, though it's huge, with hairy arms and sharp teeth. His dad calls the claim ridiculous, but guess what? It's not. Because we enter a point of view from outside the house, looking in through a window, and whatever it is, it's lightly growling. It is a monster. Also, Sabrina, this is what I'm saying. A. We both agree it's a bit scary what's going on, but, baby, did you know right away this was going to be a movie within a movie?

[Sabrina Bryant]

No, I didn't.

[Will Fried]

You did.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Okay, I. I went. I. I was, like, shocked, and I'm, like, kind of embarrassed that I didn't realize that that was happening because I went. We are getting to some serious really quickly, really fast. And then it happened. And I was like, oh, you dumb, dumb. Like, what? Like, come on, Sabrina, you've been watching this stuff too much to know to not realize that was happening, like, right from the start. I think I was just really caug. Being the. The idea that this little brother was calling his sister a cow. I think that's where I was still.

[Will Fried]

Still figuring that out.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Try to figure that out real quick.

[Will Fried]

Yeah, yeah. No, I. It took me about 30 seconds, but I was like, oh, this is going to be fake.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah, okay. See, No, I wasn't. And I. I'm embarrassed.

[Will Fried]

Good. The camera angles are weird. I was like, oh, they're. They're doing a fake, like, horror movie. Here.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah. Well, it's also hard too, because it's on YouTube, so it's, you know, trying to very quickly kind of like, figure it out. Figure that out was, you know. But I shouldn't give myself that much credit. I was an idiot. Sorry.

[Will Fried]

So just as Ben succumbs to his dad's insistence that monsters aren't real, whatever is outside is gearing up. The kids leave to do homework with mom while dad sticks around the kitchen to wash him dishes. But he stumbles, dropping a sharp knife down the drain. Damn. He reaches in to get it as it spins with the compactor. He sizes up how he's going to receive, how he's going to retrieve it, and it's all pretty luminous. And then. Smash. A monster in. A flannel crashes through the window, grabs dad's head and squeezes as hard as he can. We get a close up of the monster's face, and it's almost dripping with teeth in every direction. It's truly horrifying, especially for a kid's movie. The dad screams as they both look at the looming circling knife. And then it's like the monster's gonna slam his head down and the knife to grind up his head. And then we pull out. It is just a movie. We're in a packed theater watching Warthead 4 A Day in the Country.

[Sabrina Bryant]

The movie titles that are in this movie are pretty dang good. I think, like pretty good. 4.

[Will Fried]

It's pretty good.

[Sabrina Bryant]

They're good.

[Will Fried]

So we zoom in then on two boys, Gilbert and Marshall. The bespeckled Gilbert is screaming and very scared. Marshall is way more seasoned to frights. Gilbert can't take it anymore, so he sprints off to the lobby where he says he will need to vomit. The movie ends and the crowd disperses. Marshall reunited with Gilbert, who was waiting outside. Gilbert is not ashamed whatsoever. He likes happy movies like the Sound of Music. On their walk home, the boys talk about. By the way, that was me. I was that guy. I don't want to go see a horror movie. I'd much rather sing. The hills are alive with the sound of Music. Yes. On their walk home, the boys talk about their upcoming Halloween costumes, or lack thereof. Gilbert, who already feels like a wet blanket, calls it a dumb tradition. And just as they're about to cross the street, a car goes speeding by, eventually swerving and making a harsh, very unsafe turn. That is Mr. Kubot, Marshall's creepy neighbor who always drives like a madman. Gilbert has delivered his newspaper for two years, but is too afraid to even collect the money.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Okay, wait, hold on. We're back at this paper job that I don't fully understand.

[Will Fried]

Fully understand. Okay, okay.

[Sabrina Bryant]

So I'm like, okay, so you have to collect the money from every. Did you ever have this job? Did you have anyone?

[Will Fried]

I've never had a real job, so.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I'm, like, so confused now. I'm like, so this kid that gets hired to do this, to throw the papers, right?

[Will Fried]

You drive your bike.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah, you drive your bike. You throw the paper.

[Will Fried]

You throw your paper.

[Sabrina Bryant]

But then you also have to go around and collect money. This is like. That's a lot for a kid to do, to collect money from adults.

[Will Fried]

I think you do. You have your little notebook, and you have to go like, hey, Mr. Johnson, you owe me for last month or last week or whatever. I think. I think that's how it works.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Wow.

[Will Fried]

And then do you take your cut or the newspaper gets it cut? I don't know.

[Sabrina Bryant]

It's like, this just seems like a really complicated job for, like, a kid that I would assume would be, like, 11. Right.

[Will Fried]

You know who. You know who we should ask about this? Kathy Ireland, the supermodel.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Why?

[Will Fried]

Because Kathy Ireland was, like, one of the. She won an award for. For, like, most prolific newspaper delivery person when she was a kid.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Now, I know you're.

[Will Fried]

Swear to God, she. She told us this story on pod meets world. I swear to God. And it was something like they weren't. They didn't want to give her the award because she was a girl or something like that, but it was. There was something about that. Yeah, it was a whole thing.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Wow.

[Will Fried]

Okay. Hand to God. Hand to God.

[Sabrina Bryant]

All right.

[Will Fried]

I'm remembering that correctly. Yes, but it is. They have to, like, collect the money or whatever. But what did they not have, Sabrina?

[Sabrina Bryant]

They didn't have that paper magic.

[Will Fried]

Launching things from.

[Sabrina Bryant]

From. From the other leftovers. From the Left. From the.

[Will Fried]

Exactly. From. From me, too. That was the other one.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Got it.

[Will Fried]

Oh, man. Oh, by the way, I just got a text. They are down to two Jonas Brothers. And so Marshall has decided tonight is the night they do something about that. It's payday. But, Bill, I was thinking about one of the Jonas Brothers being killed off.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Can't happen.

[Will Fried]

Because it's like, it would never. The Jobros wouldn't allow it.

[Sabrina Bryant]

No.

[Will Fried]

But Gilbert begs him to leave him alone. Just leave it alone. He doesn't want to collect the. The. The money. But there's an urban legend that Kubot actually killed a kid once. But Marshall reveals the kid just moved to Toronto. And just like that, Marshall ignores his pal and stomps right up to the creepy man's front door and rings the doorbell. A bright porch light turns on, blinding the two boys as Mr. Kubot answers the door. He is a tall, scary presence holding an attack dog on a chain. Marshall tries to explain the money owed, but when the dog begins to ferociously bark, the boys scurry off screaming in fear. They're followed closely behind by the sprinting canine who only stops when he runs out of the chain. Mr. Kubot laughs in satisfaction and the boys yell all the way to Marshall's house. Once home, Marshall is greeted by his mom, then her new eager to please boyfriend Ted. This of course is Mr. Fagerbachy. Gilbert takes off as Marshall retreats to his bedroom to avoid his mom's new companion. And he is coming on a little strong like hey Palace. Hey bud. Huh? How's everything going, sport? It's like all right by the second, sport, get the hell out of my face. Marshall's room is, by the way, a horror fan's dream. It's filled with full size monsters and intricate masks. His mom knocks on the door to explain to him that Brad is a really nice guy. Marshall's parents divorced and it obviously still affects him. A few days later at school, the boys are eating lunch when their friend Amy. Okay, we're going to, we're going to go down, we're going to, we're going to eventually talk about Amy a little bit because Amy to me is the most, one of the most bonkers characters in the history of decoms.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yes.

[Will Fried]

She's mean and snarky and sexual and it's like, it's the strangest choice for a 12 year old character in the history of any decom we've seen.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Right. Well already we're jumping into something that we rarely see on the D in the dcoms is divorce.

[Will Fried]

Right away.

[Sabrina Bryant]

That's what happened. That's one of my Sabrina Cs. Like right off the bat we're like four or five minutes in and finding out a divorce. Not that it's a bad topic, but it's different from what we are used to seeing on the channel.

[Will Fried]

Absolutely.

[Sabrina Bryant]

At this point after we've watched 700 of them. And so we're, I mean then you get hit in the face with Amy and she just gets crazier and crazier as we continue through the movie. Like it really, she's, she's a different kind of character and very different from what we see her In True Confessions could not have been.

[Will Fried]

Oh, my God.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Night and day. Of the kind of character we see in True Confession. She's a great actress.

[Will Fried]

Like, she's very, very good. And it's a good character. It's a good character. It's just not a decal.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah, exactly. You're just. I mean, I was so thrown so many times in this movie. It was just like. And she's the one that I'm assuming is the one that you went and told sue about. It was one of her favorite quotes.

[Will Fried]

We will talk about this. So a few days later at school, they're eating lunch. Amy arrives. She has news. He's dead. She says Mr. Kubot was found sprawled out on the kitchen floor covered in pancake batter, but it was a heart attack. He was just making pancakes at the time. Amy says that Kubot used to work at some museum in New York and has no friends or surviving family. Her mom is selling his house, and it's very, very spooky. There's even a rumor that Kubot has a coffin in his basement. Marshall doesn't believe it, so Amy says there's only one way to find out. And despite Gilbert saying it's a bad idea today, they start breaking the law. And that's one of the on running things of this movie, is these little felons running around the town, wreaking havoc everywhere.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I mean, when we talk about teacups, we talk about, like, all these, like, great choices that the kids are learning to make. And this one is, like, a bad choice after a bad choice after very, very bad choices.

[Will Fried]

Dude. It's unbelievable. So, of course, that night, Amy and Marshall force Gilbert to join him. They're going to break into Kubot's house. And when they arrive, after much effort, they push their way in through a basement window. Gilbert, upside down, surveys the scene. It's weird, but not too scary until he spots it. It's an old Egyptian tomb with a mummy's hand peeking out. Gilbert screams, running off into the night, and his friends chase after him to find out what he saw. But he immediately realizes he left his glasses in the basement, so there's no way he's going back. He tells his pals that he saw a coffin and a hand. Marshall and Amy force scaredy cat Gilbert to return to the basement through some very friendly blackmail. And Amy reveals she's had the front door key from her mom the entire. She just thought breaking in would be more fun. They could have walked in the front door, but she wanted them to break in it's specifically talking about. Yeah, I thought breaking in would be more fun.

[Sabrina Bryant]

And to be honest, I feel like when you're growing up, every group of friends has this chick or, or guy or dude or dude that is coming up with these bad ideas and for whatever reason the rest of you ding dongs go with these stupid ideas. I know I had one. I think I might have been one.

[Will Fried]

That's. Well, that's what I'm gonna ask. Cause it leads me to a great question. How many crimes did you commit as a kid and what were they?

[Sabrina Bryant]

Oh, man. I don't. I don't honestly think, if anything, I was the chicken that didn't wanna do anything and just kind of, if anything, that was usually me. But I would do stuff that I knew if I got caught wouldn't be that bad. Like breaking into my sister's room. Right. That kind of stuff.

[Will Fried]

Oh, that's not.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah, that's not that' that bad. But I felt like that was. I had some balls to do it because my sister found out I was really going to be in trouble. But actually breaking the law, I didn't. I don't. I don't think I did that. Really. I honestly can't think of one. Do you have one? Did you break the law, Will?

[Will Fried]

No. No, I never did. I was an amazing kid.

[Sabrina Bryant]

You want to be recorded and on.

[Will Fried]

Camera and I was an amazing kid. I never broke the law as a kid in any way, shape or form.

[Sabrina Bryant]

All right?

[Will Fried]

I never did anything. Not even that one complete and total angel.

[Sabrina Bryant]

All right?

[Will Fried]

I did. I got into. Let's put it this way, I might have gotten into some shenanigans and. Or monkey shines. It. It might have happened, but I didn't do anything horrible. But, you know, there was an occasional. My friends and I would break into our school when we were like, you know, in the seventh grade. Like that kind of stuff.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Okay.

[Will Fried]

But nothing. We didn't do anything. Like, we never caused any serious damage or lit fires or didn't do any of that kind of crazy stuff.

[Sabrina Bryant]

We didn't steal cars or never interested in that.

[Will Fried]

I wasn't, I was a scaredy cat of my, of my group as well. I, We. We would sneak. You know, one of the things we used to do, which I guess is technically breaking the law, is we would all gather at a friend's house for a sleepover and then we'd sneak out in the middle of the night to go to a girl's house who was also having a sleepover and Then you'd like try to kiss the girls over there. So like, you know, walking through the town at 3 o' clock in the morning, trying to get to the other side of town through train tracks and stuff like that. Dangerous and probably technically breaking the lot.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Was stuff like that.

[Will Fried]

That, yeah, that we were doing, but never anything that was, you know, like this girl is. She's advocating serious law.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Breaking an abandoned house and doing that kind of stuff. That's a lot less like. Especially when you have keys from her mom too, though. She's stealing a key of a house that they don't own. That's right, they're not okay either.

[Will Fried]

Also choosing to break the law over just opening the door like she's like, no, I wanted to break some stuff. Yikes. So anyway, they unlock the door and they walk in and we see the mummy hand in the basement, slowly moving. So maybe he's weak waking up. The house looks very much abandoned. The kids navigate their way through the dust, eventually finding the basement door. Amy and Marshall make their way downstairs, with Gilbert staying upstairs. That would have been me finally getting out of his journey. He doesn't want to be there in the first place, but now he's alone, surrounded by slamming shut doors, creaky noises and a turning doorknob. And just when he's had enough, his friends return, seemingly unfazed by the basement. A terrified Gilbert begins to describe what he's been seeing. And that's when an angry mummy bursts through the nearby door. He waddles towards the kids who try to hide from him throughout the house, eventually landing in a bedroom and blocking the door with furniture. But it does nothing to keep them safe. The mummy, now grunting loudly, breaks through it immediately. They're trapped and staring at the monster, completely at his mercy. And just when you think he's going to attack, he notices a nearby toilet. He detours, entering the bathroom and then takes a long pee and gives a sigh of satisfaction. Is this our first urinating in a. In a decom?

[Sabrina Bryant]

I believe so.

[Will Fried]

Okay. That we, we have yet to have any bodily functions. Right. In a decom at this point.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I don't think we've ever used a restroom. No, no, we didn't.

[Will Fried]

We haven't. Zac Efron isn't in the middle of the song, then goes, excuse me. And then walks in to pee and we listen to him pee. That hasn't happened.

[Sabrina Bryant]

No.

[Will Fried]

As he's still singing in the bathroom.

[Sabrina Bryant]

That would have been racy in its own right. So I think we steer clear from Zach ever doing something like that, you.

[Will Fried]

Didn'T have to stop strutting halfway through to run to the restroom really quick. That's not a thing.

[Sabrina Bryant]

No. No.

[Will Fried]

Gotcha. Yeah.

[Nissan Commercial Voice]

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[Colgate Commercial Voice]

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[Dramos from Life as a Gringo Podcast]

Hey, it's Dramos from the Life as a Gringo podcast. And on this special episode, I'm talking about how growing up in a Latino household shaped the way we learned, or didn't learn, about sex, vulnerability and protecting our health. Our parents were oftentimes incredibly tough on us in, in, you know, the. The Latin community and not any shade to them. It's obviously they wanted nothing but the best for us and to protect us and keep us safe. But As a result, I think there wasn't much opportunity for real dialogue around important things or deep things or feelings or vulnerability. And I would include sex under that sort of umbrella. It was sort of more of you're getting talked to rather than somebody having a conversation with you. And that doesn't create an environment where you feel like you can be open and honest and vulnerable and ask questions. You can listen to this special episode of Life as a Gringo, brought to you by Healthy Sexual from Gilead sciences on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Wilmer Valderrama]

This live check in is brought to you by State Farm. Polque el bienestado familia tambien. Merci. Proteccion. Okay, real talk. I'm about to become a dad again. And, wow, it hits different the second time. Hi, I'm Wilmar Valderrama, and I've done, you know, I've done the red carpets, the long days on set and all that, but nothing prepares you for that moment when you're building a crib and you realize you're building a future. Familia is everything to me. The laughs, the chaos, the unconditional love, but also the pressure. La responsabilidad. If you're stepping into something big right now, starting a family, getting engaged, moving cities, you're not alone. Take one step at a time. Why breathe? Be present and lean into the people. They've got your back. It is fruta. Like a good neighbor. A state farm is there.

[Will Fried]

So while he urinates, the kids make a beeline for the door. You can tell the decom's still trying to find itself. But the mummy catches Gilbert, grabbing him by the shirt and picking him up off the ground. But instead of killing the boy, which would have kind of been on par for this movie, he hands him his glasses. Gilbert thanks the monster, but is spooked by Marshall's beeping digital watch. But again, he doesn't attack. He just wants to see the watch. And when it beeps again, it's. It's the mummy who cowers in fear. Marshall explains it just tells the time and has a calendar. It's obvious this mummy isn't gonna hurt him. He's friendly, but very, very smelly. And Marshall decides he's gonna keep the mummy. He doesn't want anyone to capture their new friend and treat him like E.T. they even mention E.T. so they lock him in the house and promise they'll be back tomorrow. And so the next morning at school, the friends regroup. Marshall doesn't want anybody to know about the mummy, especially his mom or her new dumb boyfriend. Then Todd, a redhead with a crush on Amy, who obviously is like the son of one of the directors of the writers, pops up at their lockers, but she won't give him the time of day. Matter of fact, she's kind of a.

[Sabrina Bryant]

She's rude as hell to him. Like, rude rude.

[Will Fried]

And he's super sweet and not creepy. He doesn't come in a creepy way. He's, like, very nice. They make him a nice kid, and they make her just flat out mean again. Yeah. So he apologizes for living and breathing the same air as her and trails off. She admits she could never like him because he saw the Olsen twins movie twice. Is that such a bad thing? And then he never appears again. It is quite an odd thing. Quite an odd cameo. A scene you can cut. We could have gotten closer to the 90 minutes because it was completely and totally unnecessary.

[Sabrina Bryant]

He never comes back.

[Will Fried]

Nope. Never comes back. It's never mentioned. No one's.

[Sabrina Bryant]

That's.

[Will Fried]

That's it. It's. That was.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Again, have a great day.

[Will Fried]

I will be happy to fund your movie if you give my son a part. Marshall wonders if he should skip school to go take care of the mummy. Amy still isn't sold that the monster is nice. And Marshall admits they need to learn more about him. And he knows just the guy to go to. We cut to the Forbidden World bookstore. It's owned by a guy named Bruce and filled with items perfect for either Halloween decorating or furnishing a serial killer's apartment. Skulls, candelabras, old books. Eventually, Bruce stumbles out from the back room. He's choking and can't breathe. He eventually falls flat in his face, revealing a knife in his bloody back. Oh, my God. Marshall says it looks incredibly fake. And Bruce, who is very much still alive, is offended. It was a prank. Marshall introduces his friends to Bruce, who then goes on about how the new Warthead movie, the one we saw in the beginning, is art. The kids pretend they're writing a report on mummies, and Bruce leads them to a dusty book. He explains they were guardians in Egypt now, buried in coffins, ready to attack anyone who ever disturbs their holy crypt. And every year around Halloween. And this is where I was like, okay, thank God they're putting some rules to it. So I'm happy now. The spirit of a mummy can be freed to walk the earth during a full moon, but if it doesn't return by midnight, his soul will be lost forever. And they recognize One of the book's illustrations. They saw it on the coffin itself. At Kubots. It's the eye of rain, the sun God. When the kids return to Kubot's house, a little boy named Leonard greets them by asking him if they'd like to see him picking a scab. The kid exchanges words with Amy, with the young girl mentioning her bra. And maybe we're realizing once again why this isn't on Disney. Disney plus. This is weird. Bizarre. Gotta be a producer's kid cameo number two in the film. I mean, what were you thinking at this point? This. I was like, what is this kid doing here?

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yes. And, yeah. Why is it. Why aren't throughout this entire movie any of these kids supervised? I'm gonna jump to Sabrina Sees right now. Because they seem. I mean, look, I might have been a little bit more sheltered than most kids. That's okay for me to say because Monroe's gonna get another five years of the shelteredness than what I even got.

[Will Fried]

Oh, God, poor kid.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I know, but. Right. Aw, so sad. However Ledger. Ledger can fend for himself. He's already okay to, like, go out on the streets by himself. No one's messing with him. I just feel like even the movie theater, they seemed very young to be by themselves. By themselves at the movie theater with the mom. Not even at least in the back row. Or then even more to walk home from the movie theater by themselves.

[Will Fried]

It's supposed to be small town America in the mid-90s, which is a little safer, I guess. It wasn't really.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I get. Was it? I don't know. I was not allowed to be anywhere of sorts. How. How old do we think these kids are at this point?

[Will Fried]

Like what I was thinking, like 11, probably.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yes. Okay. That's what I was thinking. So I think at 11, I was maybe able to ride my bike up to, like, the boardwalk and Carl's Jr. Shopping Center. But I don't. I don't even know. Like, at night? No. During the day. In the summertime? Yeah.

[Will Fried]

Yeah.

[Sabrina Bryant]

At night. I don't know. There's just no supervision.

[Will Fried]

No, there isn't. And it's like, it's got to be a rated R movie. So how did they get into the movie?

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yes, exactly. So there's a lot of questionable parenting.

[Will Fried]

I agree. I agree, quote, unquote parenting.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah. Decisions being made here.

[Will Fried]

Yeah, it's really crazy.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Sorry.

[Will Fried]

No, I agree with you. I agree with you. 100. I agree with you 100%. So. Yeah. But it was also just. She's talking about her bra at 11. This little kid's whole cameo was.

[Sabrina Bryant]

This kid is much younger, too. Oh, yeah.

[Will Fried]

Oh, I don't think he's even 8 or 9. I would say he's 5 or 6. Yeah, he's young.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Where's his parents? Where are they? They're not in the front yard. They're like. I mean, he's sitting there watching. I don't know if he's like, the next door neighbor to this crazy Kubot.

[Will Fried]

House or what I think it's supposed to be. He's also. He does have the funny line, though, about carrying a blankie. He's like, it's not a blankie. It's a towel in case I, like, have to clean up something on the way. It was like, what? It's the. Just. It's bonkers. Some of this dialogue is really weird.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I love that. Is that a blankie?

[Will Fried]

It's not a blankie. It's my towel in case I gotta clean stuff up on the way home. Like, oh, Jesus. Sorry, Billy. That was nuts. Little Leonard mentions a yellow truck parked outside earlier and it took all of the Kubot stuff away. The kids dart into the house, which is now completely empty, and are greeted by Amy's mom, the realtor. She explains the IRS confiscated his belongings to pay off debt. The kids cannot believe it. Meanwhile, down at the local dairy Freeze the mummy is aimlessly roaming the streets. He enters the drive through and is confused by the intercom, eventually groaning out an order for burgers, fries, and a jumbo orange soda. Worth noting here, people. The total was $3.74 for all of.

[Sabrina Bryant]

The food he bought.

[Will Fried]

My age and want to hear. Very, very old. I. You know, the last time I was at a fast food place, I got like a number one and a burger or something. It's like $19. What? Are you kidding me?

[Sabrina Bryant]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Will Fried]

Insane.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah. A family of four easily throws down $50. Like, if not more.

[Will Fried]

Yeah, it's crazy. McDonald's, yes.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Not even getting extra stuff. Ordering the meals. And it's like a drink of fry and a burger or a drink of fries. Yeah, and a burger. And that's it. 50 bucks.

[Will Fried]

People should be ashamed of themselves. He takes only a soda, though, and burps his way into the town center, apparently undetected by everyone. Until a little kid in a B costume points him out to his mom as, quote, unquote, an ugly person. But she won't look because some people are just born, quote, special.

[Sabrina Bryant]

And the kid says.

[Will Fried]

Well, then he's very special.

[Sabrina Bryant]

That was just, like, such a normal thing for a kid to say, being like, okay, but he's very special.

[Will Fried]

Now, roaming in the park, the mummy throws out his soda because mummies don't litter, obviously. And that's when he sees a hospital next door. A man is being wheeled in after an accident and is wrapped in gauze head to toe. The mummy gets very excited at the sight and runs over to see what he assumes is probably a relative. Once inside the hospital, the automatic doors close on one of his bandages and slowly unravels him as he walks the halls. I thought this was going to end. Meaning, like, he was totally unraveled, but it just didn't. He's. He's heartwarmed by relatives embracing and given some forms to fill out. He even sees people, like, handing each other flowers. It's very nice. But when a nurse finally sees him, she is terrified. Everyone assumes he's a burn victim who treated himself. And a doctor throws him on a gurney. They can't find a heartbeat and he's not breathing, so they hit him with a defibrillator, shocking him and helping him escape. Very funny. And just when the kids think they'll never see him again, they spot the mummy fleeing the hospital. They help him hide from the orderlies, and Marshall offers his house to hide at because, well, since Ted is around all the time, his mom is used to big clunky dudes walking around. And so they sneak the mummy into his attic, which, remember, is filled with so many monsters that he fits right in. Which is put to the test when Marshall's mom enters wondering about the noises she's been hearing. While the mummy pretends to be just another statue. Amy tap dances poorly to explain the noises. And of course his idiot mom buys it. She just wants him to clean his room because it stinks. So once she leaves, Marshall douses the monster in cologne, though that helps for the time being. They know that they have to get him back into his coffin by midnight or else it's going to be bad. In the meantime, the monster tries to eat a goldfish, plays the song All By Myself by Eric Carmen on the boombox, and it's given the name Harold by Marshall.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Was that a cover or was that an act?

[Will Fried]

No, I think it was the real one.

[Sabrina Bryant]

The original.

[Will Fried]

I think it was the original, yeah. Here's the other thing. This is where. This is one of the lines where I paused and went, really? So he's given the. The name Harold by Marshall because he looks like his Uncle Harold. And then they Cut to Amy, who says, oh, my God, your aunt must want to open a vein. And I'm like, oh, it's our first dcom suicide joke.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Oh, okay. Yeah, I just thought. She just again, is so mean. I didn't even think about it's a suicide joke. Words that she said. Yes.

[Will Fried]

Yes, it is our very first. Chalk it up, people. If your bingo card was first Disney Channel suicide joke, you can click it off the map because there it is. Wow.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah.

[Will Fried]

I was like, geez.

[Sabrina Bryant]

But of the time, those kinds of things were so normal to say.

[Will Fried]

Now here's the thing.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I would.

[Will Fried]

I agree.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I don't even want to say them because it's like you just don't say that stuff anymore.

[Will Fried]

No, I agree, but I. I don't think it was even of the time for a kids movie, though.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Oh, well, not. Not a Disney kid.

[Will Fried]

That's what I'm saying. They're still finding themselves. And we obviously, we. Hey, we had all of the podcasts now all the shows, all the re. Watch everything. You do your best to realize all this stuff is done and it's different time. I totally understand that. And you can't. You can't put the. The. The things that we know now are things you shouldn't say on 30 years ago. It's just not the way it works. However, I would say even 30 years ago in a Disney movie, they're not making suicide jokes. No. Right.

[Sabrina Bryant]

The. Yeah. Gosh. No, I don't. I really. I think you're right. I can't. I can't think of any movie that. That would ever have done that. Really.

[Will Fried]

I mean, maybe like a Mighty Ducks. It would have been something like, why don't you. Over your own neck? I mean, like, they might have thrown something like. But you know what I mean? Like, it would be something ridiculous like that. It wouldn't be a straight up. She was literally like, your aunt must. Your uncle looks like that. Your aunt must want to kill herself. Was like, oh, my God. Yeah, Amy. Yeah, Amy's a. Let's relax. Amy is a total. In this movie.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Like, we need to. Oh, my gosh. Like, what is happening in your house right now that's gotten you to be saying things like this? Yeah, I know something's going on in Amy's house. I will say I was. Was little in the 90s, and I know that kids did say harsh things like this.

[Will Fried]

You know, kids have always said harsh stuff, but they don't put it in movies.

[Sabrina Bryant]

No. Yeah. Wow.

[Will Fried]

Yeah. So that, to me, it was like, oh, my God, I can't. But they. Well, there's a suicide joke.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah.

[Will Fried]

That night, after Amy's suicide jokes, we're transported to a warehouse. There are some mafia guys arguing while standing over Harold's coffin. The mob boss tells his workers to find him him. It's not like he can get up and walk away. And while Marshall watches his mom and Ted kiss goodbye at his car, he complains to Harold. His parents divorced three years ago, and he doesn't see his dad much. He thinks love is overrated. As Marshall retreats to bed, Harold seems sad and offers his new friend a plant in comfort. He seems like a nice mummy after all. He's mimicking what he saw in the hospital where they she handed him the flowers. It was very sweet.

[Sabrina Bryant]

It was.

[Will Fried]

And then Amy comes in and goes, why don't you kill yours? And that night, Harold is wide awake as Marshall sleeps. To pass the time, he toys with a kooshball gun. Sabrina, please tell me you know what a koosh ball was.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I did, I did. I was like, oh, that's like. I love the throwbacks. When we get these. You know, one of the movies we just recently the. The clear phone that lights up when it rings. Like, those things are so awesome to me. I love seeing them in these old.

[Will Fried]

Take me right back to a time when. When koosh balls were fun. That's all we know. While playing with the gun, it accidentally goes off, but luckily it doesn't wake Marshall. It just shoots the koosh ball out of an open window. And so to get it back, Harold leaves the house only to find a dog with the ball in its mouth. They stare each other down until Harold tries to catch him off guard, causing a chase. Harold stumbles onto a skateboard, haphazardly riding it down the sidewalk and eventually slamming it into a stop sign. But he quickly gets up and continues following the animal, ending in at the dog's house. Or a dog house. It's actually the dog's house. You know what I'm saying? Now, with the mud hiding inside, Harold reaches into the doghouse. But the dog has sunk its teeth deep into him and won't let it go. It's a tug of war between the mummy and the dog until Harold is distracted by a passing city bus with an ad for the mysteries of the pyramids exhibit. The graphic includes the symbol of the sun God Ra, exciting the mummy. So he runs off to chase it, submitting to the dog and its koosh ball forever. Back at home, Marshall awakens in the middle of the night to realize his monster has escaped. He takes to the streets with Amy and Gilbert on their bikes to find him. Also, while making fun of Gilbert's pajamas, Amy reveals she sleeps in the nude, forcing Gilbert to crash into a mailbox. And yes, this is why it wasn't on Disney plus. This is when I paused the movie and went, I'm going to walk the length of my home to go speak to my wife about what I just saw on the screen.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I could not. I stopped and had to say, Jordan, this girl is talking about being nude. And he goes, well, where's this, where was this movie? And I'm like, it's a Disney movie. And he's like, this was on the channel.

[Will Fried]

I'm like, yes, I sleep in the nude. The 11 or 12 year old girl talking about how she sleeps in the nude. This was bonk. Thank you. The exact word. This was bananas to me. Not bananas, bananers. It was so crazy that this made it into a Disney Channel movie.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yes. I thought bra would be where we cut. The line would be drawn.

[Will Fried]

No.

[Sabrina Bryant]

No.

[Will Fried]

I mean this was. I know it's the, it's just the word nude. It shouldn't be that big a deal but. But it is a.

[Sabrina Bryant]

It is with you.

[Will Fried]

11 year old girl talking about sleeping naked.

[Sabrina Bryant]

So weird. It's so weird on so many different levels.

[Will Fried]

Weird.

[Sabrina Bryant]

It's just not right. It's not right.

[Will Fried]

They are definitely finding their footing still on the channel at this point.

[Sabrina Bryant]

To be honest. Now that we are talking, I mean we know now that it's not on Disney, I would be calling Disney plus and being like, I need my money back. This is ridiculous. I can now not trust Monroe to just be like browsing around mommy, what does it mean to sleep in the nude? She doesn't even know that word. It's.

[Will Fried]

I mean it's, it's amazing. It's truly amazing.

[Sabrina Bryant]

By the way, my anxiety was like through the roof. Like where are we going with this next? I couldn't believe this character Lose Magoo's and what's happening.

[Will Fried]

Yes, it's a crazy. She's making suicide jokes, talking about sleeping in the nude, talking about I don't like Amy mean to people. It's such a strange character and it's so great. She's a good actor, she's playing well. But it's like, it's.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Well, you know, the thing is such a strange character. She's not the only. I mean not that we would expect something like this but like the nature of her Character is so not a best friend kind of character that we see in Disney movies. This is the villain or the mean girl who comes in and out here and there. But like, she's like the best best friend. So it's very strange. Very, very strange.

[Will Fried]

I couldn't. I. I really could not believe it. I could not believe it.

[Sabrina Bryant]

What did sue say?

[Will Fried]

She's like, wait, wait, what? And I'm like, this is. Is this as weird as I think it is? She's like, yes, it is as weird as you think it is. Yes, it is.

[Sabrina Bryant]

It is.

[Will Fried]

It's just. Yeah. Well, they're still trying to find their footing. Luckily for the kids, they just stumble on the pyramids exhibit and guess that's where Harold has to be. What a beautiful coincidence. And conclusion. And so what do they do? Well, they're kids, they're normal. They're so. Yes. They break into the museum. And we now just have to accept that these three children are stone cold criminals just breaking the law left and right. Now, in all fairness to the kids, what they, what they do show later on is that obviously Harold broke through the door of the museum. Like, you can see that he broke the doors off its hinges when the police go in there. So obviously they're just walking in after him. It's not like she pulls out a lockpick set from her nude, go kill.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yourself, steal this key.

[Will Fried]

Right. Or steal this key. Or she's got a blowtorch or something like that. Right? She. I wouldn't be surprised if she. Right before they broke in, she's like, give me a second, I just want to smoke a joint. Yeah. So it's.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I think we're going to see something really entertaining. So I just want to make sure I'm on the right level.

[Will Fried]

Yeah, exactly, exactly. I know what's going to happen. I'm just going to drop some acid real quick. That sounds like. Like it's perfectly online with the Amy character. Yes. So. But yeah, they still just break in here. And once inside, they find Harold. Ex. You know what I want to do? We've got to find this girl who's now a lawyer, a woman who's now a lawyer somewhere. And I have to talk to her about this character. We have to find this. I mean, I will, I will pay her retainer myself to just have a one hour meeting with her to have her come on, to ask her what it's like as this character. Character is crazy.

[Nissan Commercial Voice]

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[Dramos from Life as a Gringo Podcast]

Hey, it's Dramos from the Life as a Gringo podcast and on this special episode I'm talking about how growing up in a Latino household shaped the way we learned, or didn't learn about sex, vulnerability and protecting our health. Our parents were oftentimes incredibly tough on us in, in, you know, the the Latin community and not any shade to them. It's obviously they wanted nothing but the best for us and to protect us and keep us safe. But as a result I think there wasn't much opportunity for real dialogue around important things or deep things or feelings or vulnerability. And I would include sex under that sort of umbrella. It was sort of more of you're getting talked to rather than somebody having a conversation with you. And that doesn't create. Create an environment where you feel like you can be open and honest and vulnerable and ask questions. You can listen to this special episode of Life as a Gringo, brought to you by Healthy Sexual from Gilead sciences on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

[State Farm Commercial Voice]

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[Will Fried]

So once inside, they find Harold examining all the artifacts. He seems very affected by one tomb in particular, marked as the Queen's. She was the lover of the high priest, a man who was her bodyguard and confidant. Though it had to be a secret because of her status, he swore to be by her side in this life and the next. And now it's very obvious that Harold was that high priest. Also. The kids talk about celibacy and how this herald was celibate his whole life. And Gilbert says, or what is. What is celibacy? And Amy again turns around and says, no chicks. Amy knows all, says, no chicks. And he says, well, that's, you know. And she says, you'll get used to it.

[Sabrina Bryant]

And then it's another moment, like, another moment that you think the kids that watch the Disney Channel. We're not talking about the Disney movies. The Disney Channel. And then are pausing and going, mom, what's celibacy? I don't get it. What does no chicks mean? Yeah, honey.

[Will Fried]

But then turning to him and yes, turn that off. Turn it off. Turn it off.

[Sabrina Bryant]

We're done. We're done. We're done.

[Will Fried]

Yeah. But again, then when he says, oh, you know, I. I could never do that. And she turns to him and goes, you'll get used to it. Like, it's like, oh, my God, she's so mean. It's like, good luck. Buddy, you're. You're only. You're only 10. But I can tell you right now, you're never gonna know the love of. Of a woman. You're never gonna know the touch of a woman. Like, oh, my God, it's so horrible.

[Sabrina Bryant]

She's so grown. Why does she know what that means? I don't know. I don't get it.

[Will Fried]

Something's going. I don't want to. It's such a bananas character. Harold opens the tomb and the queen is inside. He caresses her emerald necklace and reveals he's wearing a matching one. He closes the casket in sadness just as the police car pulls up outside. Still exploring the exhibit, Harold reads some nearby hieroglyphics and finds out that he'll need to be back in the coffin by midnight or he too will die. Marshall promises they'll make that happen just as the cop searches the museum. But luckily enough, he doesn't find the sly kids and their mummy. And if you listen to the cop, like, he's totally off camera, but you can essentially hear his walkie talkie, and he's like, well, whoever did, it's gone. And she's like, all right, you can come back. He's been there for 30 seconds. The door's off the hinges. But they're like. He's like, well, nobody here. All right, you're good. Come on home.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Good.

[Will Fried]

Yes.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Case solved.

[Will Fried]

Yep. Great police work. We're all good. Thank you, Officer Useless. The next day, Amy arrives at Marshall's house drinking a beer. I'm kidding, but you might as well have been. And he looks exhausted because Amy. Couldn't you just see her just walking up day drinking? That sounds like Amy to me. Just seriously, just for no reason, right? It's just perfectly on brand. She comes up, she's got. She's got. She's holding a six pack, there's only two left, and she's putting out her cigarette. That's. That's Amy. Seriously, though, she seriously is like, hey, is your mom. Your mom's liquor cabinet locked in any serious kind of way? That's Amy. Seriously. That's Amy. I'm telling you. Yikes. Amy arrives. She looks. But he looks exhausted. Harold was up all night watching sappy romcoms, crying while watching Pretty Woman, Sleepless in Seattle, and Ghost. This is one very emotional monster.

[Sabrina Bryant]

And very adult films.

[Will Fried]

Yes.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah, well, now we're talking about a pretty. A prostitute. We're talking about. Seriously, a lot of.

[Will Fried]

Not to go off on a tangent, but have you watched Sleepless in Seattle? Recently?

[Sabrina Bryant]

Not recently, but I have seen it a few times.

[Will Fried]

Go back and watch Sleepless in Seattle because Meg Ryan's character is awful in Sleepless in Seattle.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Okay?

[Will Fried]

She's supposed to be the cute. She's awful. She's got this man that loves her that she's about to marry, but she hears some random guy on the radio, then starts stalking the random guy on the radio to the point where she shows up at his house, all the while, the guy's planning their wedding inside.

[Sabrina Bryant]

The house, outside the house. Yeah, that's true.

[Will Fried]

Go back and watch Sleepless in Seattle because again, Tom Hanks is wonderful. The kid is great. Meg Ryan's good, but. And you're like, you just. They rip. You know, when he's telling. Talking about his wife, it rips your heart out. Anybody who's been in love knows that feeling. It's just, my God, I love this person so much. And then Stocky McGee shows up and it's like, you're marrying the nicest guy in the world and this is what you're. It's. Seriously, it's. It's bonkers. Go away. This is. Amy grows up to be. To be Meg Ryan's character in Sleepless in Seattle. I'm telling you. So. Yeah, just. I know it has nothing to do with our podcast, but go check it out again. Poor Amy. Dude, Amy's. Amy's got some demons.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Got a rough life ahead of.

[Will Fried]

Amy's got some demons. I'm telling you, it's something's. Yeah, like she. Like she's the person who babysits but gets paid in poker chips. Like, she's like that kind of. It's like, yeah, that kind. Thanks for coming over. I left you a 50 poker chip.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Oh.

[Will Fried]

Anyway.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Slinging drugs out of her.

[Will Fried]

She. Yes, something has happened. Oh, you want a dime bag? Go to Amy.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Oh, my gosh. Okay.

[Will Fried]

The most crazy dcom character we have seen to date.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I'm telling you, she is wild. She's wild.

[Will Fried]

They wrote a like a 40 year old divorce and just went, just make her 12. It's like, oh, my God, it is crazy.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Oh, man.

[Will Fried]

Amy wants Marshall to brace himself in case they can't save his friend. But Marshall protects himself by saying he's just a mummy, not a real friend. But the facade quickly breaks and he admits he does care about Harold. Then, even though they're supposed to be keeping a low profile, Gilbert and Harold come storming out of the house, playing and yelling. Marshall reminds them they can't get caught. And then, well, of course they get caught. Little Leonard. Oh Leonard. The other kid they wrote as a 25 year old man who just happened to be cast as a six year old. One of the more unique child actors we've ever encountered. At a decom, he walks into the backyard and sees the mummy. He is astounded and asks if he's from that huge coffin they moved out of the Kubota house. The kids stop dead in their tracks. Wait, he saw a coffin? Leonard says there was something written on the side of the yellow moving truck, but Leonard can't read. But he does reveal whoever was driving the yellow truck wouldn't give him an ice cream. Which I had to rewind four times to understand because I couldn't understand what they were. Ice cream. Like what? What? Quite the actor. You will be shocked by the way to hear this was his only acting credit ever. The kids of course deduced that the yellow truck had to be from the local Aaron's ice cream factory over in the orchards. They're gonna take Harold out there to investigate, but they need a disguise. So they rush to the vintage store and buy him a vintage 1970s Elton John looking outfit. All the way down to his platform shoes. The crew struts down the street to get down tonight. Another familiar song. So they're buying real, real songs here and the wardrobe is actually working. He even catches the attention of a stylish hot lady walking by. But when she gets a closer look, she screams at what she sees. Guess you can't win them all the kit when it wouldn't matter anyway because no chicks. The kids hop back on their bikes. With Harold getting a small girl's bike, they make their way to the orchard area. They scope out Aaron's ice cream factory from afar but don't see anything because they're using binoculars that they got in a happy meal. So Marshall decides he needs to get a closer look. Harold aggressively throws the boy over a wall, making Amy very mad. Dad. She starts earnestly punching the mummy. And this is where I was offended. Lady, calm down. He's a monster who's been trying to help. So now Amy is, is progressed to ag assault.

[Sabrina Bryant]

She's abusive. She's abusive.

[Will Fried]

We've got assault and battery, breaking and entering, I mean, you name it, this girl has got. By the time she's 18, she's gonna have a record the size of my arm. It's like, come on Amy. Amy. Somebody. Amy needs. She's got a God sized hole. Somebody needs to get to Amy because something's going on. And so now Marshall sneaks inside the ice cream factory, again breaking the law. Kids are looking somewhere between 20 to 50 years in jail, in my opinion. If they can get all their everything ducks in a row, this is multiple felonies at this point. Marshall eventually spots the mob guys and overhears them talking about how the mummy is missing. And this is when he figures out the mob boss is Mr. Kubot. What a twist. Did you realize that earlier? Did you know?

[Sabrina Bryant]

Obvious.

[Will Fried]

They didn't hide anything. Just as that sinks in, Marshall gets a jump scare from Harold, who has joined him in the factory. The mummy spots his coffin, but they decide to wait and figure out an escape plan first. So they regroup with Amy and Gilbert. Harold once again powerfully tossing his friend over the wall, which, it's very funny, but he's gonna kill this kid. Marshall tells his friends all about Kubot. He probably faked his own death to sell the coffin. And so now they have to find a car big enough to haul the sarcophagus, which. Which is no easy task for a bunch of felony preteens. But they're wanted in nine states by this point. Or is it? But Marshall has an idea. They're just gonna need more costumes. The plan is to ask the spooky bookstore owner, Bruce, because of his hearse. He has a hearse?

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah, of course, of course. Right, right.

[Will Fried]

Of course. Who's ever hearse of that? I'll show myself out, though. The idea is good. Unfortunately for the kids, one of the goons spotted them on the way out of the factory because they were, you know, escaping under the COVID of day. And they go and they tell Kubot. So obviously, now they're on to our heroes on the other side of town. The kids are now in costume, and they arrive at the town Halloween carnival, which is a weird party. There's kids, there's adults.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Very strange.

[Will Fried]

There's adults hitting on each other, but there's kids running all over the place. Is it a meat market? Like, what is this party?

[Sabrina Bryant]

But the crazy thing is, is. Well, I'll let you continue to go. Go farther. But there's another part of it where it's like, this party is weird. Really, really weird.

[Will Fried]

Like swingers weird.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yes.

[Will Fried]

Yeah. Okay, so, hey, at least Amy isn't involved in this one. So they arrive at the weird Halloween haunted house. Gilbert is dressed as a hat, half Dennis Rodman, and Amy is a half Princess Leia. The crew splits up. Marshall and Amy will go inside to find Bruce, while Gilbert and Harold wait outside. But since Harold is still scaring civilians. They cover his mouth with the extra bandage to lessen the shock. Marshall and Amy stop by the carnival dance first when they see Marshall's mom happily dancing with her boyfriend Ted. So his mom is at the party, but he wasn't going to the party. His mom was going to the local town Halloween party, but she wasn't going to bring her child, who was super into Halloween and Spot and monsters and.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Right. But it's a swingers party, so right sense for him to be there.

[Will Fried]

There's kids there. It's so weird. It's a. We just a weird party. It's a weird, weird party.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Uncomfortable.

[Will Fried]

Yes. So yeah, they're okay. Amy admits that his mom and the new boyfriend actually look in love, and Marshall pretends it doesn't bother him, but again, it obviously does. Amy then, as a good friend, offers her help, or just an ear if he never needs to talk to her, and he thanks her and she lights another joint. Outside, Gilbert and Harold are bored, so Gilbert decides to go get some sodas, which sure feels like a very bad idea. And back inside, Marshall finds Bruce and reveals they found a mummy. But Bruce assumes they're just talking about a Halloween costume and isn't impressed. Marshall assures him it's a real mummy and takes him to sea. And just at that moment, Harold hears All By Myself Again by Eric Carmen, who every time I see it sounds like Eric Cartman blasting from inside the carnival. He must get closer to hear it. It was a terrible Cartman, by the way. He leaves his post and walks right into the event just as the Goons pull up to get him. When Gilbert does return with the soda, he can't find Harold, but instead sees henchmen in Aaron's ice cream jackets. He knows this is a problem and hurries to warn Marshall. Harold navigates his way through the dance floor, eventually landing near the speakers and dancing by himself. That is, until he spots a woman dressed as Cleopatra. He begins worshipping her, falling to his knees, but she thinks it's just some guy flirting with her. She's also turned on by his stink and wants to dance with him. Nearby, Gilbert thinks he's found Harold, but it's actually just a mummy costume. Also, he earnestly punches the guy who he thinks is Harold. So everyone just beating up Harold. Maybe these kids don't deserve to have a monster after all. Anyway, that wasn't Harold. It was his principle, which adds a new wrinkle. Which we never ever hear about again.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Right.

[Will Fried]

Just never happens again. The Goons check on every mummy at the party while Marshall and Amy explain the whole story to Bruce. But he still doesn't believe them. Cleopatra is now all horned up by Harold on the dance floor. When Gilbert finds them, he then pulls the mummy away, explaining that this man is celibate, but Cleopatra doesn't believe that. But when Phil, the guy in the mummy costume, and his wife get all tangled up in this wife swap thing, Cleopatra's unraveling Harold to find out what's going on. And when she uncovers his face, the entire party runs off screaming. The goons notice the commotion and run to go get him, but Bruce finally believes the kids. They all sprint through the haunted house, dodging corpses and decorations, eventually getting outside to the hearse. What did you think of the whole adult swinging aspect of the Halloween party?

[Sabrina Bryant]

I mean, first of all, yes, the. The principal is when she said, well, if that's your husband. So was the principal who she thought was returning from the bathroom, who had been flirting with her earlier. It got very messy. And the fact that she was like, well, then, if that's not. If that's your husband, who is this?

[Dramos from Life as a Gringo Podcast]

Right.

[Will Fried]

Adultery is always messy, Sabrina.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Ah, my God. It was just like.

[Will Fried]

It's so weird.

[Sabrina Bryant]

It was so strange. And again, kids are there, but like, again, there's really no supervision. Like these people are going in. And it was weird to me. Like, if it was a. If it. If we're in this again, I'm go back to the parenting. And we're supposed to be in this small town. How do they not know each other? How are they at this party? Whose party is this that there's so many people that you're running into, people you really, honestly don't know. Weird.

[Will Fried]

Yeah. And it's like a kid. It's a swingers party, but there's kids there. The whole thing. There's a haunted mansion, but also probably an orgy room. Like, what the hell is. What is this? What is this party?

[Sabrina Bryant]

I can't.

[Will Fried]

I can't either.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I hate it. I was so glad for the party to be done. I was so uncomfortable.

[Will Fried]

Yeah, it was really, really weird. Just really.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Oh, yeah. And then again, and I always have an issue. I always bring this up. We just talked about it at the high school party that happened with the last movie was like, these strange men come in. They're not in uniform or dressed. I mean, they're not in costume. And not one person is like, hey, who are you? No, who are you? Why are you at this party?

[Will Fried]

Who don't need to know that. Don't need to know that.

[Sabrina Bryant]

They're just gonna rummage through it.

[Will Fried]

Yep. And pull off people's masks. And nobody says anything.

[Sabrina Bryant]

And it's like no one says anything.

[Will Fried]

They're pushing people. It's very strange. Amy would have taken care of it, but she's way too stoned. Harold pushes the door closed, locking the henchmen inside, but he can't hold them back forever. And it's almost midnight, but Harold knows if he joins him in the car, the goons will get the kids. So he sacrifices himself and stays behind. Bruce and the kids speed off to safety, Marshall screaming all the while for his friend as they leave. And once they're gone, the goons do break through the barrier, knocking Harold to the floor, giving him a chance to grab him. And this is where I was like, okay, so if the whole point of the goons is that they're gonna grab the mummy to bring him back to his sarcophagus, to put him in the sarcophagus, to then sell it, that's what we wanna have happen. That's the goal, is we wanna get him back to his sarcophagus later. They kind of redeem it by having him say, no, I'm gonna sell. You're more valuable on your own. Yeah, so I get that. But it was like, I sat there the whole time going, like, but. But I thought this is what they want to have happen.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Right. But the fact is that with the rules that we know, which the rules were very easy to find out. So if this guy owned this sarcophagus and this mummy, he would have known that if he's not in the sarcophagus by a certain amount of time, then he would, like, disintegrate.

[Will Fried]

Yeah, I guess he didn't know the rules because he didn't have a rules.

[Sabrina Bryant]

When he was supposed to. Supposed to be this, like, curator of, like, a. A big museum. How do you not know the rules? Kubot.

[Will Fried]

Yeah, what's up? Come on, what's up? Kubot? I don't get it. Yeah, very strange. But we're now in the hearse. Bruce wants to go to the cops, but Amy explains how crazy they'll sound. Instead, they go to the ice cream factory, assuming that's where they'll take Harold. And when they arrive, Bruce opens his trunk to reveal a ton of fake severed limbs, bones, and skulls all ready to use. But even with this, Gilbert wants to stay in the car. He's too scared. Marshall tells him not to worry and lets him chicken out. And so the plan has begun. If you want to call it a plan. Amy runs to the goon crying for help. She's applied a fake eye and blood to her face. And when the criminal tries to help, he's attacked by Marshall and Bruce, ending with a big frog splash by book by the bookstore owner. Yeah, he just slams the guy. They tie up the bad guy with fake intestines. While Amy and Bruce try to run interference, Marshall will run around back to try and save Harold. Harold, stick with us, people. Inside. When the shady buyer arrives for the coffin, Kubot takes control. Knowing he doesn't have the mummy, Marshall quickly finds Harold chained to a pipe. After scratching his face for him because he had an itch, he finds a crowbar to free him. And at the same time, Bruce and Amy's plan to cause a diversion isn't going so well. Bruce has climbed to some scaffolding and is now dangling from a pipe. It breaks, eventually tossing him to the ground in a free fall, making a huge commotion. They quickly are snatched up by the goons. But it makes for the perfect distraction. As Marshall frees Harold, they quickly start pushing the coffin towards the hearse. But then Kubot reveals himself from the shadows. He knows there's money in the mummy, and he's not letting them leave. He explains that over the years, he's accumulated a collection of artifacts from the museum he worked at, and his plan was to sell them off and retire. But the IRS started to investigate him, and so he knew he had to fake his own death. Seems like quite a jump. And as Kubot continues to detail his motive, Harold is falling apart. It's getting closer and closer to midnight. And now a captured Amy and Bruce have been brought to Kubot, who instructs the guys to get rid of them. He's going to kill the children.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Children. The children.

[Will Fried]

Yeah, he's gonna kill the children. Then, when things look their most bleak. Crash. The hearse slams through the warehouse like a gothic Kool Aid, man. Oh, yeah, that's my gothic Kool Aid.

[Dramos from Life as a Gringo Podcast]

You get it?

[Will Fried]

Oh, yeah, it's. That was a good joke. If anybody out there gets that, it's Gilbert. He saved the day, because the crash makes the ceiling come right down on the bad guys, and it looks like they're all killed. It is an incredible smash of all the stuff from the ceiling, but somehow, Kubot has survived. He emerges with a gun, instructing the kids to just leave the mummy behind. And as he prepares to shoot Marshall, Harold attacks. He grabs Kubot and throws Him. Across the room, the kids hug their mummy and celebrate. And Amy admits that she was scared something was going to happen to Marshall. She doesn't know what she would do if it did. It appears this crush is developing. Oh, but before that, Harold needs to get into the tomb and get back to the museum. Also, did Kubot die? Is he dead? Is that guy dead now?

[Sabrina Bryant]

I mean, it was aggressive, but, like, I'm assuming it was just like, knocking him out, but, like, never. Do we see what happens to him after?

[Will Fried]

No, it's never tied up. No, no, it's okay.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah. They are really for the sequel.

[Will Fried]

Yeah, exactly. They're really a bit too confident considering he was just thrown once and already survived a ceiling crash. So, okay, he's. It is what it is. The kids throw everything into one of the ice cream trucks and speed to the museum. Once in the exhibit, Harold opens the queen's casket, and with his last breaths, he removes his necklace and ignites the medallion on the queen's neck. She opens her eyes and emerges from the sarcophagus. They embrace, but Harold knows he must hurry back, back to his coffin. They touch hands one last time, and Marshall, Amy, Gilbert, they all have teary goodbyes with their newfound friend. With both mummies in place, Harold hands Marshall his necklace to keep. In the end, these two built quite a beautiful relationship. Even though a bunch of kids punched him, you know, over and over and over again. Both the queen and Harold lay down as Marshall closes the coffin doors. The next morning, Marshall has decided to throw away all his spooky Halloween stuff. He tells his mom he's outgrown it. It. His mom gets serious and wants to know if he's okay about Ted. He again pretends that everything's okay, but quickly changes his tune. He asks her, do you love him? She admits she does. And so Marshall suggests that they get married. She can't let him get in the way of true love. He looks at Harold's necklace and admits a new friend has changed his perspective. And then Gilbert arrives. Turns out Amy is coming to the house to go see a movie. And Marshall becomes very nervous about what he's wearing and how his hair looks. And when she does finally arrive, she's also decked out. But they cut through the tension by insulting each other. Just like old times, they call each other geeks and losers. And of course, Gilbert is relieved. For a minute, he thought things were going to change. We fade out as they make their way to see Warthead one more time. And that's our movie. Yikes.

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[Colgate Commercial Voice]

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[Dramos from Life as a Gringo Podcast]

Hey, it's Ramos from the Life is a Gringo podcast. And on this special episode, I'm getting real about sex, especially how growing up in a Latino house household impacts the conversations we have about it. I think it's safe to say that most people's parents probably weren't too comfortable with the topic of sex and speaking about sex with their kid. You know, there are obviously a lot of stigmas around the topic of sex when it comes to our parents. And I think back to my own personal experiences. You know, we never really had the birds and the bees talk talk. You know, it was more of like, you know, sex is Something you save for someone you really care about.

[Will Fried]

And.

[Dramos from Life as a Gringo Podcast]

And that was sort of the extent of it, right? You can listen to this special episode of Life as a Gringo brought to you by Healthy Sexual from Gilead sciences on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Sabrina Bryant]

This mood check is brought to you by State Farm. Por que tu bieng estar ta am bien. Merced protecion que tal mi gente honey. German. Checking in. Contigo. Take a second. Literal mente un momentico parati. How's yecorazon feeling today? If it's a little tired, a little. Oof. You're not alone. Have you eaten algorico? Taken a deep breath, maybe even turned off your phone for cinco minutitos. I promise the memes will still be there. Sometimes self care is in candles and meditations. It's just saying no. It's drinking a little bit of agua. It's letting yourself rest. Simpena, you don't have to prove anything today.

[Nissan Commercial Voice]

Just be breathe.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Estas haciendo lo mejor que puedes. And yes, that's enough. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.

[Will Fried]

Let's do real reviews, then we'll talk. I have the one star review this week and this is a one star review from Trugara. I hope I'm saying that right.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Right.

[Will Fried]

Here we go. Parents beware. I figured, quote, oh, my God, this looks dumb and boring, unquote. But I was literally shocked. This was aimed at kids. This movie has so much gore in it. Like the opening where a monster barges into a kitchen and murders a man by pushing his head on the blade of a knife with enough pressure to kill him in front of his wife, son and daughter. Have your kids watch this and they'll come running to you at night saying they had nightmares. By the way, I'm not a Karen. I'm telling the truth. If your kids can handle that content, feel free to let them watch this. Wow, that is a long, long one star Karen. Thank you very much. Yeah, Sabrina, you got the five star. What do you got?

[Sabrina Bryant]

I do. I've got it. A five star from Joel H. I thought I hated under wraps, but as it turns out, I was thinking of a completely different dcom. My mistake. Under wraps isn't that bad. Okay, five stars.

[Will Fried]

Five stars. All right. And now we're gonna get to our Sabrinas favorite portion, of course, of the program. And that is our weekly feature to celebrate our start of spooky season. And the closest we'll get to A true horror dcom. We're celebrating some of the scariest movies ever made. We'll be given the name and year of a horror movie. And we must guess what number one through ten it was given on the list of top ten scariest horror movies of all time. According to our friends at Rotten Tomatoes, if we can nail three out of five, we win. Oh, that's gonna be really tough. Okay, so first up is, by the way, is producer Jensen here? I heard he might not be.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Not.

[Will Fried]

Okay, so who's with us today? Is it producer Lisa? Who do we have?

[Sabrina Bryant]

Michaela.

[Will Fried]

We got Michaela. Producer Michaela with us. All right, so producer Michaela, here we go. First up, what number one through ten, one being scariest is the Exorcist, 1973.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Three. Oh, okay. I. I mean, I would think it was like nine at least.

[Will Fried]

So. So that means not scary, cuz one is the scariest.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Oh, no, then I would say like at least like two.

[Will Fried]

See, I'm going to agree with you. I was going to say one or two. I'm going to say two with you.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Two. Let's do two. It's number one.

[Will Fried]

It is one. Okay, I can see that.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I can sense.

[Will Fried]

Totally see that.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah.

[Will Fried]

Okay. Second, Halloween, 1978.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Oh, two.

[Will Fried]

I'm gonna say.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Four. That's four.

[Will Fried]

I've never seen these movies.

[Sabrina Bryant]

You've never seen Halloween?

[Will Fried]

I have not. Of course not. I don't like movies with my sleep.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I would say it would be two. Number seven.

[Will Fried]

Oh, wow. Okay.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Oh my gosh. No.

[Will Fried]

You know, my problem with these movies is I have a photographic memory, so I can't unsee things. So when I see something gory or disgusting, when I shut my eyes, I can't not see it. So I can't watch this stuff.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah, it's part of the fun, but it's also like not.

[Will Fried]

Yeah, no. Can't do it. Third, the Shinin. I'm kidding. It's the Shining. That's for all my Simpsons fans out there. It's the Shinin. Do you want to be sued? Yeah. So, the Shining.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Shining.

[Will Fried]

What do you think?

[Sabrina Bryant]

I'm gonna go with number three.

[Will Fried]

Shining was a freaky movie. I'm gonna. I'm gonna try number four again.

[Sabrina Bryant]

You're right. Well, it's number four.

[Will Fried]

Oh, I got one. Right. Okay. And now fourth, the conjuring from 2013.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I don't even know anything.

[Will Fried]

This is a freaky movie though, isn't it?

[Sabrina Bryant]

I don't know. I've never seen it. Never even heard of this? Yes. It's with the Annabelle doll.

[Will Fried]

Okay, I'm gonna say this is number five.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Five. Yeah. Five. It's number three.

[Will Fried]

It is number three. And finally. So we can't win. We've already lost. Thank you, producer Jensen. Finally, the ring from 2002. I'm gonna say that's number two. That's a scary movie. I've seen the ring.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Talk about a visual. Number six.

[Will Fried]

It's number six.

[Sabrina Bryant]

No way.

[Will Fried]

Do you have. Do you have the whole list in front of you? I do, yes. So can you read them? Yeah.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Exorcist was number one.

[Will Fried]

One is Exorcist.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yep. Number two, Hereditary.

[Will Fried]

Okay.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Number three, conjuring. Number four, the Shining. Number five, Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Oh, my God. Yeah. Holy cow. Number six, the Ring. Halloween. Number seven. Number eight, Sinister. Number nine, Insidious. And number ten. It.

[Will Fried]

Wait a second, wait a second.

[Sabrina Bryant]

It isn't in there at all.

[Will Fried]

Forget that. How is the first Nightmare on Elm street not on that list? How is the first time we see Freddy Krueger not in the top 10?

[Sabrina Bryant]

Is it Freddy Krueger Halloween?

[Will Fried]

No, Halloween is Michael Myers. Halloween is Michael Myers. Oh, how that first Nightmare on Elm street, which I have seen part of and scared the hell out of me, how that is not in the top 10, is crazy to me.

[Sabrina Bryant]

The Saw movie, the franchise of Saw, didn't make it in the top 10 at all.

[Will Fried]

Guess not.

[Sabrina Bryant]

That's insane.

[Will Fried]

I don't believe this list. I believe producer Jensen's wrong and this list is incorrect. Thank you, Mikaela.

[Sabrina Bryant]

This is also from Rotten Tomatoes, so.

[Will Fried]

I don't buy that. I don't buy it at all. Those tomato people. I don't buy it. Can we do some Sabrina Sees?

[Sabrina Bryant]

Okay, to be honest, I really didn't have a ton of seeing happening this movie.

[Will Fried]

That's no problem.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Especially that we haven't. Haven't covered again. And cow. Idiot. The wordings that were. The insults that were being said by these children really were just like, whoa. We just never, ever get that in the movies. And I'm grateful for it because it just caused for a very not great feeling as I was watching these, I put on Divorce. Okay. I had a question for you. Did you realize. And we talked a little bit about it and we said it in the script, but did we realize that Marshall was gonna be the main character? I. Gilbert was gonna be the main character.

[Will Fried]

I did, too.

[Sabrina Bryant]

And then all of a sudden, I was like, oh, okay. I guess we're following Marshall a little bit closer than Gilbert.

[Will Fried]

I did too. Yeah.

[Sabrina Bryant]

That was strange to me. Just the way that the beginning of the movie is set up. And then one other thing. A little bit of a supreme seize. Did you see the name of the dog that was on his doghouse?

[Will Fried]

Oh, wait. What was it? I did. What was it again?

[Sabrina Bryant]

Fang.

[Will Fried]

It was Fang. That's right. Yeah.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Such a weird. Especially for a little dog like that to be called Fang. And then it kind of made sense because he had such a tight grip on the mummy's hand. But it was funny just to Fang. And it's like so big and so like, this dog's name is Fang. Like, is that great?

[Will Fried]

Yeah. I love that.

[Sabrina Bryant]

My next question was now Leonard can't read. What's wrong with Leonard? Why can't he read when he's clearly like, like 6 or 7?

[Will Fried]

Because Leonard's got a whole nother set of problems going on with Leonard. Leonard, Leonard. Leonard's got a tough life ahead of him.

[Sabrina Bryant]

He can't read, but he can be unsupervised in front of the house.

[Will Fried]

Yeah. Leonard was like one of those street kids from the 50s. Like, I'm gonna punch you in the mush.

[Sabrina Bryant]

See?

[Will Fried]

Like one of those kids who like all of a sudden. Yeah.

[Sabrina Bryant]

And then we go. We went through the whole. The weird party. I had so many. I mean, it's like I just am like.

[Will Fried]

Sabrina doesn't want to see that party.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah. I'm like just like making it stop, basically. And then again. So Kubot's dead or not. I'm not sure. That was definitely not a thing that he could be dead. But they seem like as if he is. He doesn't get arrested. There is. It is an open door for a sequel in the sense of, like, what happened to Mr. Kubot?

[Will Fried]

Yeah. Yeah, that's it.

[Sabrina Bryant]

That's all I got.

[Will Fried]

Those are good.

[Sabrina Bryant]

That was it.

[Will Fried]

Those are good. Now we come to the portion of the program that I've been dreading this entire time, which is raiding our film. Let's do one out of ten. I'm not even make a joke about it. Let's do 1 out of 10. It's either going to be 1 out of 10 mild scares and spooky atmospheres. 1 out of 10 cow sisters, long mummy peas, red headed Todd cameos, 1 out of 10 uncles that look like monsters, 1 out of 10 koosh balls, 1 out of 10 stylish hot ladies, 1 out of 10 child criminals. 1 out of 10 gothic kool aid mans. Or I'm gonna add 1 out of 10. 45 year old divorcee characters played by 11 year old girls. I know it's long and worded, but it's gotta be in there somewhere.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Which you picked that one. So st. Gorge is a 40, 45.

[Will Fried]

Year old divorcee characters played by 11 year old girls.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Okay, that's a lot. That's a mouthful. But we gotta go with it because the Amy character was bonkers. It's bonke.

[Will Fried]

I don't know. Do we rate? I think you rate first this week.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I'm gonna. Here's the thing. As a regular movie, if this was on even Nickelodeon, it would have been so much more branded correctly than the Disney Channel movies in that scene. Like I didn't actually hate the movie. I hated it for a decom. That's what I just could not get over the fact that this was a dcom. Not just a dcom, the first dcom which should be in its own little pedestal. And I hated it for that. But I didn't actually hate the movie. It actually was kind of funny and the kids were just so rambunctious and it was so odd that I didn't hate it, which is weird. But even though I have to rate it as a dcom and I'm giving it a five, I'm giving it a five. 45 year old divorce, say characters played by an 11 year old. It's a solid five for me. It's not going up. But again, I didn't hate it that much to let it go down, but it is a five for me.

[Will Fried]

Okay, I could not agree with you more. This is you.

[Sabrina Bryant]

You.

[Will Fried]

You said exactly what I was going to say. If this was like this, I might be dating myself or you might not know this movie. But if this was like, like the Monster Squad or one of the movies where it starred kids but was. It wasn't a Disney movie. It was just a kids kind of movie. But was in the theaters, that kind of thing. Then not a bad movie. Not a bad movie at all if that's what you're talking about. The dialogue's witty and funny. She's a bat crazy character. It's. I mean it's. It's amazing.

[Sabrina Bryant]

It's suited in the 90s for that kind of character too. Like truly, seriously.

[Will Fried]

I mean, 100%. If this was just, hey, we're reviewing a movie and this is a weird movie that came out, this would be a seven or eight for me, easily. Because it's not a bad movie. The kids are pretty good. Again, the dialogue is weird. It's. But as A dcom. What the hell? It's. And the. For. You're right. The first dcom. This is supposed to be the one where it's like, oh, this is. This is Genesis.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yeah.

[Will Fried]

And it just. It was more like the band Genesis because it was like, what is going on? By the way, to all my Genesis fans out of there, some of their albums are okay, but much like a Genesis album, this could meander. So I didn't understand a lot of this being a decom. Yeah.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Okay, go ahead.

[Will Fried]

No, I'm gonna say I'm right with you. I'm. I'm gonna give it exactly like you did. I'm gonna give it a 5:45 year old divorce. Characters being played by 11 year old actors. Because again, as a movie, not bad. As a dcom, not right.

[Sabrina Bryant]

And to be fair too, I was not expecting this very first dcom. Right. This is unknown land. Right. I wasn't expecting it to be right on the mark. Right on where we found ourselves eventually, a couple years later of what the channel found. Literally. I wasn't expecting it to be right on the mark. I was expecting it to be a little. Okay, we're finding ourselves some growing pain. I 100% was.

[Will Fried]

Was. Yeah.

[Sabrina Bryant]

But not this. This I was not expecting.

[Will Fried]

I thought frankly it was gonna go the opposite direction as a dcom and be way too sappy.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Yes.

[Will Fried]

Overly childish. Not childlike, but childish and you know, overly sappy. Very big. Very big.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Everything was big. Yeah.

[Will Fried]

Disney music and the kid actors weren't going to be that good. And it was. And man, it was not that.

[Sabrina Bryant]

But it was a funny watch. And to be honest, doing the recap with you has even made it better for.

[Will Fried]

Go and watch it. It is, it is. It's crazy. It is banana pants. This movie is banana pants.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Especially if you like dcoms. It's just. You're just gonna be blown away. You gotta watch it because it's just.

[Will Fried]

The second the 11 year old girl turns and goes, I sleep in the nude, I was like, I'm out. And there we go. Go. Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. I'll back next week. I don't.

[Sabrina Bryant]

And then we. And then just minutes later, we find ourselves at a swingers party.

[Will Fried]

I'm like, what is it? Who's writing this?

[Sabrina Bryant]

Who was the president? Channel. Like who was president of the channel at this time? Because I've got words still.

[Will Fried]

Gary. It was. Yeah, we got it. We got to find out about this one. We've got to deep dive this one because crazy. But. Well, thank you, everybody, so much for joining us. Our next movie that we're going to be doing is very much on brand, so we are back on the tracks, people. Our next movie is keeping us terrified. With Halloween around the corner, we'll be watching a sequel. That's right. It's Twitches too. That's t o o as in twitches. Also, the second movie starring Tia and Tamara Mowry from 2007 is available now to watch via Disney Plus. We are back on the plus, people. So watch it before our episode and you'll be way ahead of the game. But before we take off the bandages entirely, entirely, we're going to stay in this universe, this crazy, crazy, bananas universe for Under Wraps because we spoke with Adam Wiley. I've known him for many, many years. He played young Gilbert and he gave us the lowdown on what the legacy of Under Wraps is all about. Listen here for a sneak peek. Bill Fagerbach was actually like. There was times he was close to passing out on set. Is this true? A thousand percent. He had fans all over him. He had to sit because he couldn't get out. Once he got in it, it was like even just to use the restroom was a nightmare. So he would just sit there like this. And back then we didn't have this technology. So it's not going to be like we're just gonna green screen out his mouth or whatever you do. They had to take this charcoal kind of like makeup and like spread it all over. He had to wash his mouth with it so that everything was black. Love that guy.

[Sabrina Bryant]

I'm so excited we got to meet him. He know he is. Talk about nostalgia of the 90s.

[Will Fried]

So amazing, by the way, because this movie was so crazy Pants. We did not talk nearly enough about how good he was in this movie because he was great in this movie. He was great in this movie. By far the best of the three of them, I thought. And then came Amy with the character she was playing. The old like, I gotta hurry up. I've gotta shift at the club in an hour.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Character was kind of.

[Will Fried]

He was fine. He was fine. But other two. But, but Adam was. Was absolutely great. Great in this movie. He really. And we did not talk about that enough because we were so distracted by all the other lights and sounds going on in the movie. Yes, but we love him. So you can hear everything he has to say about Under Wraps and so much more. Search for Magical Rewind wherever you get your podcast and subscribe to our dedicated feed. And for more info, you can always Follow us at Magical Rewind Pod on the Instagram machine. Bye everybody.

[Sabrina Bryant]

Bye. I sleep in the nude.

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[Sabrina Bryant]

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[Will Fried]

Can small acts make a real impact in the world? Sometimes a small thing has the power to become become more something big and meaningful. And when it comes to helping children, no act is too small when you fill up at the Purple Giving Pump at Shell, a portion of your purchase will be donated to support charities in your community. The Giving Pump Easy to stop, Easy to donate from 9125 to 103125 participating Shell stations will donate a minimum of $0.01 per gallon of the fuel pump from the Giving Pump or a minimum donation of 300.

[Sabrina Bryant]

This is an I Heart podcast.