Terminally Online: Live from Crooked Con (Subscription Preview)

Summary

Pod Save America – "Terminally Online: Live from Crooked Con" (Subscription Preview)

Date: November 28, 2025
Participants: Jon Favreau, Jon Lovett, Dan Pfeiffer, Tommy Vietor, Elijah Cohn (+ audience & producer Caroline Reston)

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Episode Overview

This lively, in-person recording of Pod Save America’s subscriber-exclusive show "Terminally Online," captured at Crooked Con, sees the hosts tackle the question: Who are the most 'terminally online' politicians of 2025? Through a signature blend of inside-joke ribbing, political insight, and off-the-cuff banter, hosts and audience alike dig into contemporary political internet culture — spotlighting the politicians who dominate (and sometimes embarrass themselves on) online platforms.

A segment of this episode revolves around a "blind ranking" game, which becomes the framework for a hilarious deep-dive into politicians' online behaviors. The episode closes with a wry, informal straw poll of Crooked Con attendees on their favorite 2028 presidential hopefuls — complete with self-aware jokes about their own polling process.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Setting the Stage: Blind Ranking Game (01:12–02:30)

• Elijah Cohen introduces the segment: The group will blindly rank the five most "online" politicians of 2025, slotting each into a spot (1–5) without knowing who comes next.
• Clarifications ensue about consensus-style ranking and game rules.
• The hosts joke about the meta-nature of picking on each other for their knowledge (or lack thereof) regarding online culture.

2. Blind Ranking: The Top 5 Most Online Politicians

Donald J. Trump Discussion (02:35–04:54)

• Trump: "The old man may have lost a couple miles per hour, but he’s still got his fastball, throwing out all-caps Truths, posting AI videos, dumping shit on Harry Sisson…" (Elijah Cohn, 02:35).
• The group debates Trump’s “terminally online” status, docking points for his isolation on Truth Social versus wider engagement.
  • Jon Lovett: "He’s almost like...remembering in The Office when they gave Creed a Word document to write into? That’s basically what he’s doing now.” (03:59)
  • Consensus: Trump goes in slot 3.

Zoran Mamdani Discussion (05:01–07:00)

• Recognized for adept digital campaigning but ultimately “too well adjusted” and “not defensive enough” to be truly terminally online.
  • Jon Lovett: "He instinctively is not defensive, which is a fundamentally not online thing." (06:14)
• Consensus: Mamdani lands at 4.

Nancy Mace & the Charleston Airport Saga (07:00–09:49)

• Nancy Mace described as "deeply online in a way that's kind of uncomfortable" due to her obsessive posting about the Charleston Airport police incident. Multiple SC politicians, including Tim Scott and Lindsey Graham, publicly chided her.
  • Tommy Vietor: "It's real main character energy." (09:39)
  • Jon Lovett: "She as a person kind of seems to capture the essence of the personality disorder of the internet." (09:26)
• Consensus: Mace is #2.

Gavin Newsom (09:53–10:36)

• Discussion of how Newsom’s online activity feels mostly staff-driven and less personally invested.
  • Dan Pfeiffer: "I think it's fair to say that Gavin is less online than Zoran." (10:15)
  • Newsom gets slotted into the only spot left, 5.

J.D. Vance – Uncontested #1 (10:43–11:22)

• Everyone immediately agrees J.D. Vance takes first place, as "America’s number one reply guy."
  • Tommy Vietor: "Unless it's an actual Nazi talking shit about his wife and kids, in which case, zip it." (11:05)
• Reference to Vance’s infamous social media spats and high engagement in toxic online discourse.

Final Blind Ranking:

1. J.D. Vance
2. Nancy Mace
3. Donald J. Trump
4. Zoran Mamdani
5. Gavin Newsom
   (11:22)

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3. Honorable Mentions – More Terminally Online Politicians (15:18–18:16)

• Graham Platner: Embodying the arc from Reddit deep-dive poster to public office.
  • Jon Lovett: "He's an inspirational story of what you can do after being too online." (05:26)
  • Jon Lovett: "Reddit is the place where you go and it’s like, is this right? I don’t know, but it came up first from a person and was expressed with confidence..." (15:38)
• Mike Lee: "Posting even harder" after being fooled or called out; “addled but incorrect energy” in his posts. (16:38)
• Valentina Gomez: Missouri/Texas figure known for outrageous, provocative content and “acted out snuff films" (17:43).
• Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC): Once the “online darling,” still capable of "breaking the Internet" when she chooses. (18:28)

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4. Crooked Con Straw Poll: 2028 Presidential Hopefuls (18:42–26:22)

Initial Results (low voter turnout humor) (19:19–20:00)

• Results:
  • 7%: Anderson Clayton, AOC
  • 15%: Wes Moore, Gavin Newsom
  • 22%: Andy Beshear
  • 31%: Pete Buttigieg
• Elijah Cohn: "There were 13 votes." (19:50)
• Plenty of tongue-in-cheek ribbing about the reliability of their “sample size.”

Live Audience Polling (21:01–25:50)

• Attendees tossed out hopefuls such as Chris Murphy, Andy Beshear, AOC (with or without Jon Ossoff), Gretchen Whitmer, Cory Booker, and J.B. Pritzker.
• Lovett waxed poetic about dining hedonistically with Pritzker:
  • Jon Lovett: "All I want is to go for an insane meal with JB Pritzker, and at the end of it, for him to be like, you did eat a lot." (23:19)
• Anecdotes about Pritzker’s legendary Chicago steakhouse crawl and gambling in Vegas, with much laughter and playful envy.

Final Audience Vote – Crooked Con Winner (25:50–26:17)

• A mock-hand count quickly escalates into a crowd chant for host Dan Pfeiffer.
• Elijah Cohn: "The winner of the crooked con 2020-25 straw poll is Dan Pfeiffer." (26:07)
• The crowd’s chant: "Yes, we Dan!" (26:17)

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Notable Quotes & Moments with Timestamps

• Elijah Cohn: “The old man may have lost a couple miles per hour, but he’s still got his fastball, throwing out all caps Truths, posting AI videos, dumping shit on Harry Sisson…” (02:35)
• Jon Lovett: "He's almost like...remembering in The Office when they gave Creed a Word document to write into? That’s basically what he’s doing now.” (03:59)
• Tommy Vietor: "Are we docking points for only posting on his dumb little tiny corner of the Internet?" (02:58)
• Jon Lovett: "She as a person kind of seems to capture the essence of the personality disorder of the internet." (09:26)
• Tommy Vietor: "It's real main character energy." (09:39)
• Jon Favreau: "If you're the vice president of the United States, and you call Jon Favreau a dipshit on a social media platform, you're automatically number one." (11:14)
• Jon Lovett: "Reddit is the place where you go and it’s like, is this right? I don’t know, but it came up first from a person and was expressed with confidence..." (15:38)
• Jon Lovett: "All I want is to go for an insane meal with JB Pritzker, and at the end of it, for him to be like, you did eat a lot." (23:19)
• Elijah Cohn: "The winner of the crooked con 2020-25 straw poll is Dan Pfeiffer." (26:07)
• Crowd chant: "Yes, we Dan!" (26:17)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [01:12]: Start of Terminally Online show and game rules
• [02:35–04:54]: Trump debate/analysis
• [05:01–07:00]: Zoran Mamdani discussion
• [07:00–09:49]: Nancy Mace and the Charleston Airport saga
• [09:53–10:36]: Gavin Newsom placement
• [10:43–11:22]: J.D. Vance and final ranking
• [15:18–18:16]: Honorable mentions
• [18:42–26:22]: Crooked Con straw poll (initial joke, live polling, big finish)
• [26:07]: Crowd declares Dan Pfeiffer winner – “Yes, we Dan”

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Tone & Atmosphere

The episode radiates the hosts’ irreverent, in-the-know wit, with playful bullying, self-effacing humor, and a delight in the quirks of political internet culture. Listeners are treated to equal parts insightful political commentary and affectionate lampooning of both politicians and the hosts themselves, with plenty of inside jokes, audience interplay, and moments of organic comedic brilliance.

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Summary Flow

Beginning with a quick primer and lighthearted game, the conversation veers into a ranking of politicians’ internet presences, skewering both right- and left-wing figures for their digital personas. The episode then opens into broader commentary on online political culture (with a few deep-cut references) before closing on a parody-laden, audience-driven poll — culminating in the crowd humorously crowning Dan Pfeiffer as their top candidate, reinforcing the fun, community vibe of the live show.

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For anyone new: This episode captures Pod Save America at its most relaxed and self-aware, mixing genuine media commentary with lively, communal humor.

Transcript

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[Jon Lovett]

That inspires hey everybody, we are off for Thanksgiving, but we would never want to leave you without some sweet, sweet content. So please enjoy a part of our subscription show Terminally Online, which we recorded live at CrookedCon. You can hear the full episode when you sign up for Friends of the [e-mail] friends when you sign up, you get ad free episodes of Pod Save America, Pod Save the World, Love it or Leave it and offline. Plus you get exclusive content like Dan Pfeiffer's Polar Coaster and more for a limited Black Friday offer. Annual subscriptions are 25% off, so go sign up. Get that offer. It is the best way to directly support us as we try to build a truly independent, progressive media organization. Again, that's crooked.com friends. Now here's terminally Online.

[Elijah Cohn]

Welcome to Terminally Online, the Crooked subscription Show. Live from CrookedCon. I'm Elijah Cohn.

[Jon Favreau]

I'm Jon Favreau. I'm.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

I'm Dan Pfeiffer.

[Tommy Vietor]

I'm Tommy Vitor.

[Jon Lovett]

I'm Jon Levitt.

[Jon Favreau]

No Barack Obama coming out.

[Elijah Cohn]

No Barack Obama.

[Jon Lovett]

All right.

[Elijah Cohn]

You guys want to play a game?

[Jon Favreau]

Yeah, sure.

[Elijah Cohn]

All right, let's do it. We're going to do a blind rankings. You're unfamiliar with how blind rankings work. I'm going to give you five things. You'll have to rank them as they come, but you don't know what's coming next, so be careful to leave that one or five spot open. What we are going to be ranking is the most online politicians of 2025.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

I have some questions. And for those who watch the show or are familiar with Elijah's work, you know that he hasn't often hasn't thought of all the rules here.

[Elijah Cohn]

So let's hash it out some rules.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Are each ranking them or are we ranking them collectively?

[Elijah Cohn]

Consensus.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Consensus.

[Jon Favreau]

Okay, I was going to ask that, but a nicer way.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Look, some of these people are Terminal Line fans and one of Elijah Told me himself. He said, bully me. He said. One of the appeals of the show is when we pick on them. So people came all the way from all across the country, and we're not.

[Jon Favreau]

Gonna pick them up. Watch Elijah get bullied in person.

[Elijah Cohn]

Let it begin.

[Tommy Vietor]

We got 38 minutes.

[Elijah Cohn]

I think it's a killer segment. I think that you guys are gonna love it.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Okay, we'll let the audience judge.

[Elijah Cohn]

All right, first politician, kind of the pace car here. President Donald J. Trump. The old man may have lost a couple miles per hour, but he's still got his fastball, throwing out all caps. Truths, posting AI videos, dumping shit on Harry Sisson, which is just like a deeply online thing. To know who that is.

[Jon Favreau]

Instant classic.

[Tommy Vietor]

Are we docking points for only posting on his dumb little tiny corner of the Internet?

[Elijah Cohn]

You can slice that either way. I mean, he's so online, he got banned and did his own platforms. And.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Are we one to five here? Is that what it is?

[Elijah Cohn]

No. I mean, you're putting him in a one to five spot.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

No, I understand how the game works. Are there five people?

[Elijah Cohn]

I'm saying you're not, like, ranked. Ranking him like a rating of 1.

[Tommy Vietor]

Get his ass, Dan.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

I just want to know how many people. Want to know how many people.

[Jon Favreau]

I feel like we can't go wrong with a three, but do we want a two, though?

[Dan Pfeiffer]

I think a two. I think a two.

[Jon Favreau]

I mean, that's a lot of people left.

[Jon Lovett]

Love it. So here's. Look, I don't want to get too ahead of Elijah, but look, we've battled before, and I've studied his moves, so we know we have JD Vance coming. I'm gonna leave the number one spot.

[Jon Favreau]

That's what I was thinking.

[Jon Lovett]

There's another super online person that we need to be aware of. I think three is right. So I think we get to deduct points for Trump because he is super online, but only in his little sandbox.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Yeah, he's.

[Jon Lovett]

He's almost like remembering in the office when they gave Creed a Word document to write into. Like, that's basically what he's doing now.

[Jon Favreau]

And also to the J.D. vance point, like, you can't be the most online politician if all you're doing is posting without replying to anyone.

[Jon Lovett]

Right, Right.

[Jon Favreau]

There's no. There's been no Trump replies.

[Tommy Vietor]

That's a good point.

[Jon Lovett]

Right, Right. No receiving.

[Jon Favreau]

No. Which makes me. That's why two or three. That's why I. Like, before.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Before we commit to three or. Or two. Sorry. Before we commit to two or Three. Would you say that Gavin Newsom is more online than Donald Trump?

[Tommy Vietor]

It's a staff thing for him.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

It's a staff.

[Jon Favreau]

Wait a minute. Do you think, do you think when he's account, like, obviously there's the Gavin Newsom press office account. That's wild. But like, I feel like Newsom himself is posting from him sometimes. No.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

I also think he's deeply familiar with the online discourse.

[Jon Favreau]

Yes.

[Jon Lovett]

Yeah, yeah, I think, I think, I think, I think three is right.

[Jon Favreau]

Three for Trump.

[Tommy Vietor]

Three.

[Jon Lovett]

Yeah.

[Elijah Cohn]

All right. Donald Trump, he's the pace card. We'll start at three. Okay. Next politician, Zoran Mamdani. A lot of ink has been spilled about how he gets it. It's a new kind of campaign. The best digital campaign ever run. Clearly he gets it. If you've seen his old posts, like, they're pretty peak lib posting.

[Tommy Vietor]

You know who we forgot?

[Elijah Cohn]

Graham Platner. He's on my honorable mentions. Yeah.

[Jon Favreau]

Fuck.

[Tommy Vietor]

Oh, yeah.

[Jon Favreau]

Reddit is a platform.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

He's a good boy. If you're a Reddit poster, you're deeply online.

[Jon Lovett]

He's an inspirational story of what you can do after being too online.

[Elijah Cohn]

Yeah.

[Tommy Vietor]

Also maybe, maybe he could be on the list because.

[Jon Favreau]

Wait a minute.

[Tommy Vietor]

Zorron's really like, like online is like. It's like a sickness.

[Jon Favreau]

We're also. We're doing 2025. Right. This is not like all. Okay, that's good to know. Yeah.

[Elijah Cohn]

I think if you know Graham Platner into this, it's, you know, your scandals coming to light year.

[Caroline Reston]

Right.

[Jon Favreau]

You're right.

[Jon Lovett]

That's not online now. He's. You can't. You can't be online. There's no single out there with the oysters. I don't think. I don't know where they come from. I'm not an oyster farmer, I guess close to land. So I think Zauron seems too well adjusted and he's instinctively not defensive, which is a fundamentally not online thing. I would say four or five.

[Tommy Vietor]

Totally.

[Jon Favreau]

Yeah. Cause he's also not. He's not replying either. Yeah, I don't think.

[Tommy Vietor]

I think he.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Like Gavin, he's very familiar with the discourse, but he's not a poster.

[Jon Favreau]

Now, are we comfortable? What do we think? Four or five?

[Dan Pfeiffer]

I think four. In case five is like Joe Biden.

[Jon Favreau]

Yeah.

[Jon Lovett]

I think there's going to be. I think there's going to be. I think we've got one. I think we've got one person whose iPhone screen text is so large you can only see a few words at A time. Present company accepted.

[Jon Favreau]

How many different places are you going to go after Chuck Schumer today?

[Jon Lovett]

This is my last panel last night. Today, I've hit it at every panel and in every interview.

[Tommy Vietor]

So where do we land?

[Jon Lovett]

That's my message of the day.

[Tommy Vietor]

Where do we land? 4 or 5?

[Jon Favreau]

4.

[Tommy Vietor]

4.

[Jon Favreau]

4.

[Elijah Cohn]

All right, so Donald Trump 3. Zoram on Donny 4. Next up, here's the curveball. 1. All right. Nancy Mace. Nancy Mace, a person who is deeply online in a way that's kind of uncomfortable to talk about. It's kind of just an excuse to talk about the Charleston Airport thing. Does anyone want to try to explain what's going on there?

[Jon Favreau]

Can I say something embarrassing?

[Elijah Cohn]

Sure.

[Jon Favreau]

I have no idea what the Charleston Airport. Oh, dude, no.

[Jon Lovett]

What?

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Are you okay?

[Jon Lovett]

How dare you.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

That's a lie.

[Jon Lovett]

What are you talking about?

[Jon Favreau]

It's been a busy week.

[Tommy Vietor]

Oh, man.

[Jon Favreau]

And that's good. I've been trying to just do a lot of. I've been. My. My. You know, I've just been deep in the precinct, county swing.

[Jon Lovett]

Why?

[Dan Pfeiffer]

You have been posting like a motherfucker the whole time.

[Jon Favreau]

Yeah. Not about Nancy Mays.

[Jon Lovett]

You used your phone at the urinal. There surely was time.

[Jon Favreau]

I've seen you at the urinal use your phone. Let's not.

[Tommy Vietor]

What are you guys trying to tell us? So Nancy Mace showed up at the Charleston Airport, had some sort of police escort that was either delayed or, like, expected her to show up in a different car than the one she arrived in, and she berated these cops. And then it became a story. I think a reporter at Wired reported it out and was, like, fired four days later because the HR guy at Conde Nast is a huge asshole.

[Elijah Cohn]

Different online story, but.

[Tommy Vietor]

Different online story, but we're connecting the dots. And then she posted a video about it, about how disappointed she was in the police. And like, every politician, Republican and Democrat in South Carolina, basically weighed in to say she's a moron.

[Jon Favreau]

So the gubernatorial race is going well, going great.

[Jon Lovett]

Tim Scott. Savita posted about it.

[Jon Favreau]

Tim Scott. Yeah.

[Jon Lovett]

Tim Scott put out a statement, basically saying, I'm always nice to the police. If you're gonna invoke my name, don't pretend I won't say anything.

[Jon Favreau]

Did she invoke his name?

[Jon Lovett]

She said, like, you're always nicer to Tim Scott. Something like that. Or Tim Scott never happened to Tim Scott. Something to that effect. And he's like, actually, I'm always quite kind to these police officers who work very hard and do a good job. And the closest thing he would. He doesn't curse, but he basically said, you can go fuck yourself.

[Jon Favreau]

She's really going through something, huh?

[Caroline Reston]

Yeah.

[Elijah Cohn]

There are some bipartisan letters. Lindsey Graham also made a statement that are just like, hey, we really like the staff at the Charleston Airport. She's posted about it hundreds of times. Yeah. Real Streisand effect.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

I think she's gotta be too.

[Jon Lovett]

I think it's too.

[Tommy Vietor]

I mean, I think it opened.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

That was the right call.

[Jon Lovett]

Even also, like, she as a person kind of seems to capture the essence of the personality disorder of the Internet. Like, if the Internet had a personality disorder, it would be the same thing that whatever Nancy Mace is walking around with, I think.

[Elijah Cohn]

Yeah.

[Tommy Vietor]

It's real main character energy.

[Elijah Cohn]

Yeah, for sure. Yeah. Even this conversation has the meta energy of like, well, we're laughing about it, but this feels uncomfortable. Yeah, we really think about it.

[Jon Favreau]

She's going through it.

[Elijah Cohn]

Okay, next up, I don't know about.

[Jon Lovett]

Y' all's five and one. We only have five and one, is that right?

[Elijah Cohn]

Yeah, five and one. So it's two Nancy Mays, three Donald J. Trump, and four, Zoran Mamdani. Next up, Gavin Newsom. I don't like Yalls list where you got to slot him at 1 or 5.

[Tommy Vietor]

I just think, like, to John's point earlier, it's a staff that's posting the fun stuff. Gavin's tweets are normal.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

I think it's fair to say that Gavin is less online than Zoron.

[Jon Favreau]

Yeah.

[Jon Lovett]

Yeah.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Like Gavin couldn't name a bunch of TikTok influencers.

[Tommy Vietor]

No.

[Jon Favreau]

Also, yeah, we're biased toward. We're talking a lot Twitter right now. And like, Zorin is doing videos all over the place.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

That's an analytical error of our agedness.

[Jon Favreau]

Which makes me feel better about.

[Tommy Vietor]

Because we're old.

[Jon Favreau]

Newsom is five, then.

[Tommy Vietor]

Yeah.

[Jon Favreau]

Okay, well, have Newsom is five. Better be a good one.

[Elijah Cohn]

No, I mean, you all know who's coming. There's a clear number one.

[Jon Lovett]

Let's hear it.

[Tommy Vietor]

J.D.

[Jon Favreau]

Vance. There we go. I thought you were going to screw us there.

[Tommy Vietor]

Number one.

[Jon Favreau]

You were going to just with changed it right there.

[Tommy Vietor]

Chuck Schumer, Americ. America's number one poster. America's number one reply guy. Unless it's an actual Nazi talking shit about his wife and kids, in which case, zip it.

[Jon Favreau]

Not even close. Yeah, not even close.

[Elijah Cohn]

Dipshit.

[Tommy Vietor]

Recalling Jon that I am a dipshit.

[Elijah Cohn]

I think if it's just a reference.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

If you're the vice president of the United States. And you call Jon Favreau a dipshit on a social media platform, you're automatically number one.

[Jon Lovett]

Yeah, that's right.

[Jon Favreau]

Yeah. I think that's fair.

[Elijah Cohn]

All right, so our list. Number one, J.D. vance. Number two, Nancy Mace. Number three, Donald J. Trump. Number four, Zoran Mandani. Number five, Gavin Newsom. I think I feel pretty good.

[Jon Lovett]

I think we did great. I think we did great. I think that's actually pretty close to right.

[Tommy Vietor]

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[Jon Favreau]

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[Jon Favreau]

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[Tommy Vietor]

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[Jon Favreau]

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[Jon Lovett]

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[Jon Favreau]

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[Jon Favreau]

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[Elijah Cohn]

Should we go through a couple honorable mentions?

[Tommy Vietor]

Sure.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Sure. Yeah.

[Elijah Cohn]

All right. Grant Platner. Thoughts about him already.

[Jon Favreau]

It's like Pee hustle.

[Tommy Vietor]

He's posting in the past, you know.

[Elijah Cohn]

But I mean, on Reddit.

[Tommy Vietor]

Yeah, I mean, I think we were.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Doing this in 2011 or when he was posting. He would win for sure.

[Jon Lovett]

Also Reddit. Look, the people that are posting over there on Reddit, they're. We need them. We need them because Google is broken. ChatGPT hallucinates. Reddit is the place where you go and it's like, is this right I don't know, but it came up first from a person and was expressed with confidence by someone who says they're from there. That's Reddit.

[Jon Favreau]

Agreed.

[Elijah Cohn]

All right, next honorable mention based Mike Lee.

[Jon Favreau]

Oh, that's a good one.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

He's basically just like J.D. vance's protege online.

[Elijah Cohn]

A guy who is constantly getting fooled and posting even harder because of it.

[Jon Favreau]

Yeah, I mean, if he was in the original rankings, he would definitely be above Zoron and Gavin.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Yeah, I think he'd be above Trump.

[Tommy Vietor]

Yeah, I think so, too.

[Jon Lovett]

He also, like, doesn't. He doesn't. It's not about frequency or volume. It is about, like. It's about. He posts with the kind of addled but incorrect energy of someone who's, like, going to respond to a text with his Social Security number.

[Elijah Cohn]

Yeah, he did that thing where he was, like, posting those horrible memes after those shootings and was like, what?

[Jon Lovett]

But then he got confronted by Amy Klobuchar and Tina Smith and then he, like, deleted it.

[Tommy Vietor]

Turtled.

[Elijah Cohn]

Tough. All right, next honorable mention. This is a real deep cut. Valentina Gomez. Valentina Gomez.

[Jon Favreau]

Oh, man.

[Jon Lovett]

Is that like the Secretary of State.

[Elijah Cohn]

Candidate somewhere or something? Yes. Who always posts likes with guns. Basically. She. Are you guys aware of Valentina Gomez?

[Dan Pfeiffer]

This is why we needed multimedia here because we got to put the pictures up.

[Elijah Cohn]

You know, I'm working with.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Going back to your earlier next year.

[Jon Lovett]

Can I tell you something? I don't know who that is.

[Tommy Vietor]

She's.

[Jon Favreau]

Oh, boy.

[Elijah Cohn]

She ran for Secretary of State in Missouri and came in six out of six. Then she has moved to Texas to primary Dan Crenshaw, I believe. And she posts these, like, insane, like, acted out snuff films.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

She's the one who went to Israel and cheered the bombs dropping in Gaza, right?

[Elijah Cohn]

Yes. She was too bloodthirsty for them to air it.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Oh, God.

[Elijah Cohn]

Yeah.

[Tommy Vietor]

Okay.

[Jon Favreau]

That function there. Yeah, Way to lighten it up. So she's a. She's a 2028 front runner, huh?

[Elijah Cohn]

She is.

[Jon Favreau]

Cool.

[Elijah Cohn]

Then last one. I mean, just feel like we should throw her out there. Aoc.

[Jon Favreau]

Oh, yeah.

[Elijah Cohn]

Again, Maybe kind of lost her fastball. Like, was the online darling, but I.

[Jon Favreau]

Don'T know if it's like lost her fastball or just like, was doing more productive things.

[Tommy Vietor]

I think she was ahead of the game, too.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

She did an Instagram live to drop gossip about Marjorie.

[Tommy Vietor]

Yeah, she broke the.

[Jon Favreau]

Oh, yeah, that is. That's very cool.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

When she wants to break the Internet, she can break the Internet.

[Elijah Cohn]

Yeah, that's true for Our outro. We have something special for you all. This is the Crooked Con straw poll. Oh, yeah, a straw poll at Crooked Con, the question was for the convention goers. Who are you excited to see run in 2028? And I have the results. I'd love to read them to you.

[Tommy Vietor]

All right, now, this is big news.

[Elijah Cohn]

Huge news. There's a big asterisk before as I'm reading this. We'll get to it at the end.

[Tommy Vietor]

Wait, I mean, it seems like you're shitting on your own news.

[Elijah Cohn]

Why don't you.

[Jon Lovett]

You're gonna tell us the asterisk after?

[Elijah Cohn]

Yes.

[Jon Lovett]

Okay.

[Elijah Cohn]

Anderson Clayton, attendee, speaker, and AOC both got 7%.

[Jon Lovett]

All right.

[Jon Favreau]

Anderson.

[Tommy Vietor]

Yeah.

[Jon Favreau]

Shout out to Anderson.

[Elijah Cohn]

Wes Moore and Gavin Newsom both got 15%.

[Tommy Vietor]

Right on.

[Elijah Cohn]

Andy Bashir clocked in at a solid 22%. And the winner with 31% of the vote was Pete Buttigieg. Do you want to.

[Jon Favreau]

Wow, look at that.

[Elijah Cohn]

You ready to guess? What the.

[Jon Favreau]

He should have come to Crooked Congress.

[Jon Lovett]

What is the asterisk?

[Elijah Cohn]

There were 13 votes.

[Jon Lovett]

How did that happen? What? What the fuck?

[Tommy Vietor]

Now, that's.

[Jon Lovett]

You showed up at this conference and none of you voted.

[Tommy Vietor]

So we forgot to ask, didn't we?

[Jon Lovett]

Well, we.

[Elijah Cohn]

You know.

[Jon Favreau]

Back to the first question. What could go better next year?

[Elijah Cohn]

We'll place the QR codes a little more strategically next year, but we want to increase that sample size. Producer Caroline Reston is out in the audience. She has a mic.

[Jon Favreau]

Incredible.

[Elijah Cohn]

We're going to do some real polling, live polling here at Crooked Con to close things up. Don, you're looking a little disapproving, a little apprehensive.

[Jon Favreau]

You know what, though? You were right to save the asterisk.

[Elijah Cohn]

Love it.

[Jon Lovett]

You nailed the asterisk.

[Jon Favreau]

You nailed the asterisk.

[Elijah Cohn]

You were right. Thank you.

[Tommy Vietor]

This is the worst poll ever.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

After this, I think you should sit down with love and explain what a punchline is.

[Elijah Cohn]

Let's get some data. Caroline, are you out there?

[Caroline Reston]

Elijah, I am out here.

[Elijah Cohn]

All right, go ahead and raise your hand if you want to share with Caroline who you want to see run in 2028. Who are you excited about seeing run in 20?

[Caroline Reston]

Stressful. Okay, what's your name, and who do you want to run in 2028?

[Elijah Cohn]

My name is Valerie McGinley, and I would like to see Chris Murphy. There we go. Chris Murphy on the call.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

People will say, my interview on this stage one hour ago launched that candidacy.

[Jon Favreau]

There you go.

[Caroline Reston]

Okay. Okay. Who else? Name and who you want to run? My name Is Zoe. I would love for Andy Bashir to run because he is a Democratic governor in a red state, and I think he has a lot of unifying messages and just a really good outlook on what problems need to be address.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Last name Bashir.

[Jon Favreau]

A lot of Bashir heads here.

[Elijah Cohn]

I have the raw vote totals. Andy Bashir has officially pulled even with Pete Buttigie, Judge and a great gunshot poll. Who's next?

[Jon Lovett]

Okay, stop the vote.

[Caroline Reston]

All right, tell me your name and who you want to see run. I'll pass the mic.

[Jon Lovett]

That's dangerous. That's crazy.

[Elijah Cohn]

My name is Burt.

[Tommy Vietor]

I would like to see AOC And.

[Elijah Cohn]

Jon Ossoff on a joint ticket.

[Tommy Vietor]

Okay.

[Jon Lovett]

Oh, either way, that's cool.

[Jon Favreau]

Cool, cool.

[Elijah Cohn]

AOC Doubles her vote total.

[Caroline Reston]

All right, name and who? Hi, I'm Shay. I would like Gretchen Whitmer to run because.

[Elijah Cohn]

No. Gretchen Whitmer enters the pitch.

[Jon Lovett]

Big Gretch.

[Caroline Reston]

Yeah, because I want us to do that song Big Gretch, like, all the time.

[Jon Lovett]

Yep.

[Jon Favreau]

Good. As reason as any. That's a great pitch.

[Caroline Reston]

All right, I'm gonna go a little bit in the back. Maybe someone will say Bethenny Frankel. Okay. Name and person.

[Tommy Vietor]

Sean and I knocked doors for Pete.

[Elijah Cohn]

In 2020, but I want AOC to run this time. Oh, switcheroo.

[Jon Favreau]

Just a shivering beat on the way to the A.O.C. yeah.

[Elijah Cohn]

Okay, one more A.O.C.

[Caroline Reston]

All right, we have probably time for one more.

[Elijah Cohn]

All right.

[Caroline Reston]

All right, name and who you want to run for.

[Elijah Cohn]

My name's David. I hope Cory Booker runs again.

[Jon Favreau]

Cory Booker.

[Jon Lovett]

Cory Booker.

[Elijah Cohn]

There we go.

[Tommy Vietor]

Teladisu on the board.

[Caroline Reston]

Okay, one more, one more, one more, one more.

[Elijah Cohn]

I'm Lindsay Moran, And I want J.D. pritzker to run. Pritzker.

[Jon Lovett]

I, like, will say this again. All I want is to go for an insane meal with JB Pritzker, and at the end of it, for him to be like, you did eat a lot.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

When Tommy and I interviewed him.

[Jon Favreau]

We're going to Vegas.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

When Tommy and I interviewed him at the convention, he told us. I think this was on the podcast.

[Tommy Vietor]

Maybe it was.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Okay, good. That. I mean, I don't think he would care if we showed this, but that he had just finished a steakhouse crawl.

[Tommy Vietor]

Crawl.

[Jon Lovett]

You just don't understand how much that means to me.

[Jon Favreau]

Was the crawl part literal?

[Elijah Cohn]

Yeah.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

No. They went from steakhouse to steakhouse.

[Jon Favreau]

Like, no, not like a bar crawl.

[Tommy Vietor]

But, like, just eating meats at every location.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Chicago, a place not exactly known for small portions.

[Tommy Vietor]

No.

[Jon Favreau]

That's awesome. Yeah.

[Jon Lovett]

We need some Hedonism on our side.

[Jon Favreau]

And I think they did.

[Tommy Vietor]

I think they might have paired it with bourbon.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Yeah, that's true.

[Jon Favreau]

They did even better also.

[Tommy Vietor]

Didn't he win, like, a $1.4 million?

[Jon Lovett]

Oh, Elijah.

[Elijah Cohn]

Vegas all over this.

[Jon Lovett]

We just.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

We got to.

[Jon Lovett]

We got to go gambling with JB Prince.

[Elijah Cohn]

Got to go.

[Jon Lovett]

I just. I want to hit the fucking tables.

[Elijah Cohn]

And you know what?

[Jon Lovett]

I love a winner.

[Tommy Vietor]

Jb, he donated it to charity, too.

[Jon Lovett]

I know. What a fucking person. The best part is you keep the money. You want it.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

According to the irs, he's only won and never lost, so it's cool.

[Elijah Cohn]

That's right. You could see in his face. He was so annoyed about giving it to charity. He was so stoked about winning. He was like, yeah, yeah, I did.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

So annoyed. That's couch cushion money to him.

[Elijah Cohn]

I know, I know. But still, winning feels great.

[Jon Lovett]

But if you. If you. If you lose, you give the money to the casino, but you win, you give it to charity. It's like. I mean, I know it's, like, good, but.

[Tommy Vietor]

I know, but where's the thrill now?

[Jon Lovett]

Where's the thrill?

[Elijah Cohn]

All right, so we call it. Should we just say. How about this? Only Pete voters and only Andy Beshear voters, stick your hands up. And then the next one wins the Crooked Con straw poll. We see there's a hand over there, and that's. You know, that's the tie. Someone asked.

[Tommy Vietor]

Wait, I feel like you have to call it a little more clearly there.

[Jon Favreau]

What kind of thing is this?

[Tommy Vietor]

That's the most. That's the most confusing explanation I've ever heard.

[Elijah Cohn]

I'm. I'm throwing things out. I see we're at the zero.

[Jon Lovett]

Elijah runs. Elijah runs. Polling for Trafalgar.

[Tommy Vietor]

Yeah. Is your number one candidate.

[Jon Lovett]

That's a joke.

[Tommy Vietor]

In 2028.

[Jon Favreau]

Pete Buttigieg.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Okay.

[Tommy Vietor]

Is your number one candidate Bashir doing. Bashir.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Is it JB Pritzker after you learned about the steakhouse crawl.

[Elijah Cohn]

Oh, there we go.

[Jon Favreau]

He should fucking thank us. We really.

[Tommy Vietor]

Is it aoc? Is it Anderson Clayton?

[Jon Favreau]

Chris Murphy? Who are we missing?

[Jon Lovett]

Gavin?

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Is it Gavin Newsom?

[Tommy Vietor]

Lena Khan?

[Elijah Cohn]

Dan, Dan. Dan. Getting love.

[Jon Lovett]

Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan.

[Elijah Cohn]

We got our winner. The winner of the crooked con 2020-25 straw poll is Dan Pfeiffer.

[Jon Favreau]

That.

[Elijah Cohn]

Yes, we, Dan.

[Jon Favreau]

Yes, we Dan.

[Dan Pfeiffer]

Yes, we have the slogan.

[Jon Lovett]

Yes, we, Dan.

[Elijah Cohn]

That'll wrap up Terminally Online live at crookedcon. Thank you all for coming to Terminally Online. Thank you for coming to CrookedCon.

[Jon Lovett]

Thanks for listening. You can sign up for Friends of the pod [e-mail] friends to get 25% off an annual subscription during our Black Friday sale. Do it please. Now. You've waited long enough and we'll see y' all on Tuesday. At Etsy. We know the holidays are already exciting, but we can't help adding a little extra joy to the season. Get up to 60% off original gifts from small shops with Etsy Cyber Specials. Terms apply for gifts that say I get you shop Etsy.

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