437: There Really Is No Secret to Keeping the House Under Control

Summary

Podcast Summary: Dana K. White: A Slob Comes Clean Episode: 437: There Really Is No Secret to Keeping the House Under Control
Release Date: December 19, 2024
Description: Reality-Based Cleaning, Organizing, and Decluttering

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Introduction

In Episode 437 of "A Slob Comes Clean," host Dani K. White delves into the practical truths of maintaining a tidy home without relying on elusive secrets. The episode emphasizes realistic cleaning and organizing strategies tailored for individuals who may not naturally lean towards meticulous housekeeping.

Key Strategies for Decluttering and Cleaning

1. Embracing Simplicity in Daily Tasks

Dani introduces the concept that maintaining a clean home doesn't require complicated systems. She shares a conversation with a guest (referred to as "Unknown") who highlights the effectiveness of simple routines.

Dani K. White [00:49]: "There really is no secret to keeping the house under control because we all want there to be a secret..."

2. Implementing the Five-Minute Pickup

One of the primary strategies discussed is the "five-minute pickup." This method involves dedicating a short, consistent time each day to address clutter before it becomes overwhelming.

Unknown [25:05]: "Actually, the popcorn and toys mess from last night definitely did only take me five minutes to clean up this morning."

Dani suggests setting a timer and documenting the before-and-after states to visualize the impact of these brief cleaning sessions.

Dani K. White [26:15]: "Take a picture before the five minutes. Take another picture at the end of five minutes and see that..."

3. Reducing Clutter Through Minimalism

The guest shares personal experiences of reducing possessions to minimize clutter, particularly in large living spaces.

Unknown [04:05]: "...there's a lot of the house that's a little bit kind of underutilized because we just don't own as much stuff."

By limiting the number of items in the home, storage areas like garages and closets become more manageable.

Personal Experiences and Challenges

1. Balancing Household Dynamics

The guest discusses the challenges of maintaining cleanliness in a busy household with three young children and both parents working full-time.

Unknown [02:28]: "We have three young kids. They're right in the thick of it. They keep us on our toes."

2. Dealing with Shared Spaces

Living with others often leads to differing views on clutter and cleanliness. The guest expresses frustration when other household members accumulate items that disrupt the minimalist approach.

Unknown [04:46]: "But a source of frustration."

Specific Solutions and Adaptations

1. Assigning Specific Places for Items

Naming and assigning specific functions to storage spaces help in maintaining organization. For example, designating a "stock room" for extra supplies ensures that items have a designated home.

Dani K. White [39:37]: "But giving it that name might allow you to use that other closet."

2. Managing Clutter Generated Outside the Home

A significant discussion revolves around managing clutter that spills from the car into the home, such as dishes and dirty laundry. The guest shares strategies like having designated trash cans near the car to quickly dispose of items and prevent them from spreading indoors.

Dani K. White [53:08]: "Can I have a trash can right where my Car is."

Mental Shifts and Mindset

1. Overcoming Perfectionism

The conversation highlights the struggle with perfectionism and the importance of shifting focus from an idealized perfectly clean home to a functional and manageable level of cleanliness.

Unknown [30:48]: "I'm gonna have to give away some more stuff because I don't have that, you know, that's sort of just the bigger list."

2. Celebrating Progress Over Perfection

Acknowledging and celebrating the progress made rather than striving for an unattainable perfect state fosters a healthier relationship with cleaning and organizing.

Dani K. White [35:20]: "My goal needs to be function and I can have people over and I did miss something..."

Conclusion and Takeaways

The episode wraps up with reflections on the importance of consistent, manageable cleaning routines and the psychological benefits of reducing clutter. The guest shares newfound acceptance and strategies for ongoing maintenance, emphasizing that while some days may feel chaotic, the overall progress offers significant mental and emotional relief.

Unknown [62:24]: "It's just not having to think about it is so freeing."

Key Takeaways:

• Consistency Over Complexity: Simple, consistent routines like five-minute pickups can effectively manage household clutter.
• Minimalism as a Tool: Reducing possessions minimizes clutter and makes organizing more manageable.
• Designated Spaces: Assigning specific functions to storage areas helps maintain organization.
• Mental Adjustments: Shifting focus from perfection to functionality improves overall well-being and reduces stress related to housekeeping.

By focusing on realistic and sustainable strategies, this episode provides valuable insights for anyone looking to maintain a tidy home without feeling overwhelmed by the need for perfection.

Transcript

[Dani K. White]

Hey, y'all.

[Lindsay]

My newest book that I have been working on for the Last Five Years comes out on February 11th. In this book, I am finally sharing the spiritual side of my desalabification process. The title of the book is Jesus doesn't care about your messy house. At the end of this episode, I'll share more about it, but for now, I'll just say that you can claim pre order bonuses now at aslobchemsclean.com Jesus welcome to a Slob comes clean, the podcast. I am Dani K. White. I share my personal des lobbification process as I figure out ways to keep my own home under control. I share the truth about cleaning and organizing strategies that actually work in real.

[Dani K. White]

Life for real people.

[Lindsay]

People who don't love cleaning and organizing. Thanks for joining me today. This is podcast number 4:37.

[Dani K. White]

And I think I'm going to call it.

[Lindsay]

There really is no secret to keeping the house under control because we all want there to be a secret and we want it to be the thing that we go, oh, I just knew that secret. This would all be easy. And there are secrets, right? But they're not really secrets.

[Dani K. White]

But you know. You know what I mean, right? That's what we talk about today. So I really enjoyed this conversation with.

[Lindsay]

One of my Patreon members. If you would like to be a Patreon member and apply to do one.

[Dani K. White]

Of these as well as other perks.

[Lindsay]

Which you might want to go check out because we have kind of va va va voomed up our Patreon stuff.

[Dani K. White]

So if you want to go find out more about that, you can go.

[Lindsay]

To patreon.com aslam chemsclean and find out more. Including we now have a level that has ad free podcasts.

[Dani K. White]

What? Anyway, but yeah, so I think you're gonna enjoy this conversation.

[Lindsay]

And don't forget, take your house back is on sale. You want to grab it now? I know it's the week before Christmas, y'all.

[Dani K. White]

How is it a week before Christmas? But I know it's a week before Christmas, but you're going to be so glad you have it when Christmas is over and you are ready to tackle your house. Because you're going to be ready to tackle your house. All right, for.

[Lindsay]

For that, go to a slob comes clean.com take.

[Dani K. White]

You can also find the links to those in the show notes of this podcast. Okay, here we go. Lindsay, thank you so much for joining me here on the podcast.

[Unknown]

Thank you for having me. I am so excited.

[Dani K. White]

I'm so Excited to have this time with you. So tell us a little bit about you and your unique current life situation.

[Unknown]

Okay. Well, my husband and I have been married 12 years. We were high school sweethearts, so we got married young and we have three young kids. We're right in the thick of it. They're eight, seven and five, two girls and a boy. And so they keep us on our toes. My husband and I both also work full time. I am an associate pastor at our church. I do music and congregational care and he's an accountant. And so we both keep really busy with work especially. My work schedule is not like normal nine to five hours. It's weekends and holidays and you know, all of that, which is great because the kids are kind of just in the thick of it with us. But it does make things just a little challenging on the home front because we don't have like a normal routine. We also, about three years ago we bought kind of our hopefully forever house and I started this decluttering slob journey two or three living situations ago. I don't even remember, but I was always like, well, when we get in our forever house, everything is just going to fall into place. But now we have 3,000 square feet that can just be cluttered or it can be immaculate, just depending on how I do with it. So we do host a lot. So it's nice having a lot of space. But that also kind of forces me to try to keep the house put together.

[Dani K. White]

That is so much space. But do you feel like the fact that you started working on things several living situations ago, are you grateful for that? Like, did you see the impact of it?

[Unknown]

100%. 100%. I mean we, in our last house, where we also lived about three years, we had one like large storage area and our two stall garage that were just completely like floor to ceiling boxes the entire time we lived there. And we've gotten to the point now where we don't have any spaces like that. And I honestly, there's a lot of the house that's a little bit kind of underutilized because we just don't, we don't own as much stuff. Like I have seen the light that owning not that much stuff is like fully like the way I want to go. But then I have like other people that live in my house and they like owning stuff and that's.

[Dani K. White]

Right.

[Unknown]

But a source of frustration.

[Dani K. White]

Oh, of course, of course. Yeah. That's the, the reality of. And the beauty of living with other people.

[Lindsay]

Right.

[Dani K. White]

You know. Yeah.

[Lindsay]

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[Dani K. White]

Okay, so tell me some things that are working well for you.

[Unknown]

So doing the dishes, which honestly, like, it kind of feels insulting to me that it's that easy because it's that easy. Like, I remember a long time ago hearing you say something about how like you wanted it to be complicated. Like you're, you know, you always thought it was going to be like some complicated, like, no, just do the dishes and then they're not everywhere. So that has been, you know, earth shattering for me because, yeah, I mean, I'm always, I won't say that they are always done, but I'm always within one dishwasher load, like, of them just being done. So it's like, you know, this morning as I'm getting the kids ready for school, it's now become just a thing where I'm, you know, they're in the kitchen getting breakfast and I'm, you know, flipping the dishwasher and doing a couple of hand dishes. Although I have a policy of not owning anything that I don't feel comfortable putting in my dishwasher.

[Dani K. White]

I am exactly the same way. I mean, like, and if it, if I'm not sure, I'd rather ruin it. Yep. I mean, you know what? You don't deserve to be in my house if you don't. If you can't go in the dishwasher.

[Unknown]

I also have the same policy about things in the washer and dryer, like laundry. If they don't go in the washer, they shouldn't be mine.

[Dani K. White]

Yeah. Yeah, I know. I. I love that. And I think, too, what you said about the, like, wanting it to be complicated, like, there's got to be something that I just haven't realized yet. You know what I mean? Like, that has to be the issue. The issue has to be a mental thing, a secret that people are not telling me, and it's like, oh, no. It's just that they're doing their dishes. Yeah. Yeah. Well.

[Unknown]

And I found that, again, getting rid of stuff to where I can't let myself go days and days and days. Like, that has been huge, too, because, yeah, we'll run out of plates. I mean, we don't run out of plates, like, the first day, because I do have. We host a lot, so I have to own enough that, like, we can have the. The people over that we have over. We have big families, extended families. We'll have 30, 40 people in our house fairly regularly. But, like, cups. If we don't do dishes in a day and a half, we're out of cups, and that's it. So that's good. It's good for.

[Dani K. White]

It is. It is. It feels like it would be limiting, but it's actually freeing for some bizarre reason. Yeah.

[Unknown]

And then I know that my dishwasher will hold the dishes it needs to hold. It's not like, you know, oh, the dishwasher is full, and there's a pile in the sink, and there's a pile on the counter, and, like, I might as well just give up now.

[Lindsay]

Yes. Yeah, exactly. Love it.

[Dani K. White]

So tell me something else that's working really well.

[Unknown]

So I will put. I will say this one with an asterisk of. It works really well when I do it, which is laundry day. The challenge for me a little bit is, like, I don't have a consistent day every week where I can guarantee that I will be home, but I have found that, like, the one load a day, which is always what I aspired to. Just, like, I would rewash the same load three times because it got left in the washing machine. And, you know. But we've gotten to the point now where at least all the clothes in the house get clean on laundry day. They don't always get put away on laundry day. But that's kind of the. That's where the system sometimes breaks down, is just when it's, like, midnight and I'M like, I need to go to bed. I can't, I can't. But it is only thing that has helped the laundry mountain.

[Dani K. White]

Yeah. And the logic would say that one load a day is best.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Lindsay]

Right.

[Dani K. White]

Like, you know, it's funny because that came up on a YouTube live recently that I was doing and I guess there were people who hadn't really heard me talk about laundry day before. And so I had so many of the like, oh, that would never work. And I'm like, you know what, I'm not gonna argue with you. But I'm also gonna tell you that logically it doesn't make sense.

[Unknown]

It doesn't. Well, and the funny thing is I would have sworn up and down that I would have had to do 12 loads. Like there's five of us in the house. I would have promised you that. It would have taken me 12 loads. And I can't do 12 loads of laundry today. It takes me four. Four loads is all it takes for a week's worth. Like that is a reasonable amount of laundry to do in a day. But I didn't know because I would, I would actually have every article of clothing in the house dirty before I would try to do the laundry day. And so then it was 12 loads. But one week's worth of clothes is three or four.

[Dani K. White]

Yes.

[Lindsay]

Right.

[Dani K. White]

It's this, it's laundry math. It's the same as dishes math. Like, and not knowing what I didn't know, like convincing myself that I knew because I'm an intelligent person, you know, I mean like really, truly, you know, you look at things.

[Unknown]

I also thought it took hours to fold and put away clothes.

[Dani K. White]

Yes, me too.

[Unknown]

Although I do have, I do have a secret to admit. I don't fold my kids clothes. They. We have like a basket system, open baskets. I just drop them in the. So you know, I sort them into the basket because they're just gonna, they just tear through their drawers anyways and unfold everything. And I'm like, I. That's just how we live now.

[Dani K. White]

Yeah.

[Lindsay]

No, I love it.

[Dani K. White]

I actually saw something. I'm sure somebody sent it to me because people send me stuff like this all the time. But it was like a, a study that was done in the 19 somethings, you know, at the time where kids were like, what now seems formal, you know, wear to school, like a button down shirt and stuff. And they had done some study over like the wrinkled stuff like that wasn't bothered. Nobody bothered to iron it. Which, you know, you had to iron more.

[Unknown]

Right.

[Dani K. White]

When things were air dried. Right. And so, you know, the thing that nobody had bothered that wasn't ironed versus the ironed thing within like two hours of being at school or something and showing that they're like exactly the same. Like, it doesn't. It didn't matter, you know, And I just thought that was really funny. But the other thing too, that I, you know, I want to say to those listening who maybe haven't heard us talk about laundry day before is like, so there's two chapters in how to manage your home about it. And it's funny because it was like they were like, this is the longest chapter ever. And I'm like, Because it's the one that we have so much resistance to. But at the same time, if the one load a day works, that's exactly what someone should do. Like, there's no reason to change. It's only whatever works for you is what. Is what matters. Yeah.

[Unknown]

Yeah. And I think for the longest time I was just convinced that one load a day didn't work because of my life. Like, I, you know, we've gone through a lot of really busy seasons where we were in school and raising kids or, you know, I was just in school again recently raising kids. Like, I'm like, well, when we're out of this season in, that's when it's gonna, like, that's when the one load a day is gonna make sense again, you know, but we never have the consistency. And honestly, to be fair, I am not a great routine person anyways. So, like, I just don't have a great consistency to do it. And this way I can just not think about it for six days. And those six days are glorious. One day a week. I do hate it. Like, I don't enjoy doing laundry. I hate it. But I only have to hate it one day a week.

[Dani K. White]

So do you do it on the same day every day every week?

[Unknown]

I, I do it on Friday or Saturday or Sunday. So I have sort of like a, like a vague laundry weekend day, depending on what day I am not working that week.

[Dani K. White]

No, I love it. I think that's. It's really important for people to like, understand that there's boundaries, but you get to decide what they are and you get to change them whenever you want to. Like, you know, like, the boundaries are only there to be helpful. They're not there to be restrictive.

[Unknown]

Yeah, I found it's even. It's better for me, even if I have to wait a couple of days before I can do laundry day. It's still better than being like, I'm just going to quick throw a load in. I only have to because it's. It just like gets me off my cycle and you know, and then I end up with just piles. I don't like piles everywhere.

[Lindsay]

Yeah, well.

[Dani K. White]

And I think, as you say, that I'm sitting here thinking about how I feel. Like so much of the value is the gathering up of all the stuff. Because when I'm only doing a load, I will only see what's in front of me and I'm not going around and gathering up. And so it's like I do a load and then realize there were three things that should have gone with that load somewhere else. And now they're like in their own weird. They have to wait for. And I know there are people out there who are like, I just throw it all together, good for you, whatever. But like, you know what I mean? Like, it just kind of messes all that up. But the gathering of everything is, is part of the value of it.

[Unknown]

Love it. And it just feels good. Like, I don't know, there's. I get that, that little bit of satisfaction when I know that my laundry is caught up. Like it's done. It's not very long before one of my kids spills something on something. But like, it's. There's just that little glimpse of like.

[Dani K. White]

Yes. Yes. Yeah.

[Lindsay]

Love it.

[Dani K. White]

Okay, so tell me something you want to talk about.

[Unknown]

Okay, so I'm not sure if this is a slob trait or just a personality flaw of mine, but I am very much like an all or nothing person. Like, I will put my heart and soul and guts into like, whatever it is that I'm doing. Unless I'm not really into doing it, in which case I'm not going to do it at all. Like, I'm just, you know. So that tends to translate into the way that I take care of my house because, you know, like, I'll be just in the zone and just everything is going to be immaculate. And that's great. And I love that. Honestly, it's like such an emotional psychological high. Just like having my house be, you know, immaculately clean. The problem is that like, again, I live with other people and even I live with myself. I can't really blame everyone else. Like, but the worst is, you know, I'll get home from work on Mondays. I work 12 hour days because of rehearsals and everything else. I'll get home, my kids will have been home for several hours and it's not immaculately clean. Like last night I got home at, you know, 9:30pm from work and there's just a bag of popcorn that has been strewn while my husband was in the other room doing something else. And then there's toys mixed in with the popcorn. And you know, and that for me it's like, okay, now the house is wrecked. Now I might as well just let it descend into chaos. Like I struggle with that kind of pendulum swing of like the house is clean, so clean that like I'm going to be picking up the kids toys as they're playing with them because I want to keep it clean. Or like I'm going to take that cup and wash it before you've actually finished all of it because it's sitting there on my otherwise clean counter. Or it's like, well, now there's a pile of dishes because, you know, I went to bed instead of doing them last night. Might as well just let it descend into cast. And I mean, I don't think those words to myself, but that's effectively kind of how I tend to be. So I guess like I want to be able to relax and enjoy things that are mostly in control because my house is, I mean, compared to, you know, what it was for a long time. My house is mostly under control most of the time. But it feels, feels like there's just kind of two extremes for me. And I guess my question is, do you have any advice for how to balance those tendencies?

[Lindsay]

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[Dani K. White]

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[Lindsay]

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[Dani K. White]

Should be cautious about.

[Lindsay]

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[Dani K. White]

I definitely think it is a trait of those of us who struggle with clutter, the all or nothing thing. I tend to be that way. Well, but I do want to be clear.

[Lindsay]

I don't see it as a personality flaw anymore.

[Dani K. White]

Like I don't. I mean like I. I'm sorry, I just, I'm like we're kind of awesome people so let's. I mean, because the reality is You're a highly creative person. It allows you to do what you do. It allows you to do the 12 hour days with an artistic endeavor that you are, you know, focused on. Like, the world needs people like us, right?

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Dani K. White]

Okay, so let's just go, okay. This is part of who I am. And that actually was a big thing for me in finally making progress was going, okay, this is my brain, right? Like, I do throw myself into it. So I'm either all about it or I'm all like, oh, whatever, you know, I mean, like it. So I totally relate to what you're saying. The thing you mentioned, like, you're not great with routines, Right. Except that you have gotten dishes to the point where you're never more than a dishwasher load away. Right. You've seen the value of laundry day. You've seen it. The value enough to be able to make that adjustment and go and go Friday, Saturday or Sunday. One of these days is going to be laundry day. And it comes around again. And you, you know, you do that. So I want to make sure you understand that maybe the way you assume other people have routines down, maybe that makes you go, oh, I'm not really, you know, good at routines. But you actually do. Like, you've come a long way. You've seen the value of decluttering to the point where it makes the things easier. But you have some things that you do that. So my answer for you would be to when you have that feeling. Because I get that feeling, right? You're like, this is great. And then I. There's things that are out of place where that maybe didn't bother me so much when the house was out of control because it was just kind of one of a lot of things. But it's like, no, I'm doing so good. I'm like picking up immediately before they're even done playing, you know, like, I'm doing so good. And it feels like one little thing is going to tip it into chaos. Right. And so, okay, we're just gonna. So the five minute pickup is everything. So when you have that feeling, say, okay, maybe I'm not great at always remembering to do the five minute pickup every single day at such and such time or whatever, which maybe you are. But like, that was me is to say, I'm having this feeling. The way I'm gonna deal with this feeling is to do a five minute pickup.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Dani K. White]

And see if the five minute pickup will take away this feeling that I'm having.

[Lindsay]

Right.

[Dani K. White]

So. So are you saying that you have the, you have things under control. You get that feeling of, oh my word, what's the point? And then it goes out of control, right?

[Unknown]

Kind of, yeah. Or just, you know, I'll have a couple of days where I'm really not home during waking hours. And then, you know, in the space of those couple of days, the house just sort of descends into chaos. It does. And then I get in project mode. Like I. Then I think, well, I might as well not do anything until I have time to do a full reset, get everything back to the way I want, you know, and so it's like I kind of. Because it's not as satisfying to me when five minute pickup is not going to get me back to immaculate. You know what I mean?

[Dani K. White]

Like, it's is not or does not. Like, are you predicting that or have you proven that?

[Unknown]

Oh, that's fair. I mean, to some extent, I think it's a little bit of both. You know, when it's really bad, you know, especially if, like, if I haven't been home for a couple days and the dishes haven't gotten done, I'm like, I know that this is not all going to get done in five minutes, but sometimes probably it is me just sort of projecting my own sense of overwhelm onto the mess. Actually, the popcorn and toys mess from last night definitely did only take me five minutes to clean up this morning. But last night I remember just thinking, this is going to take me all night. I can't even, I can't even, you know, and it was.

[Dani K. White]

Do you, do you set the Timer for the 5 minute pickup or do you just do it and think, I've.

[Unknown]

Done, I've done both ways. I do like setting the timer, actually. Probably the main thing is I know myself and I know that once I actually start cleaning up and feeling progress, most of the time I'm going to want to do more than five minutes. And so I'm like, so sometimes I'll set myself as a timer or set myself the timer. And I'm like, well, but I don't want to be done right now. But then I like reverse psychologize myself and I'm like, am I trying to trick myself into doing something I don't want to do? I think way too deeply about these things.

[Dani K. White]

No, I, well, that's how I make a living is with thinking way too deeply about these things. So I get it. I mean, I think set that timer, say tonight or the morning, whatever, you know, whenever it is, I'm just gonna do five minutes and maybe take the picture. Take a picture before the five minutes. Set that five minute timer. Take another picture at the end of five minutes and see that Because. Because it's the five minute thing is a way to get myself going because it's such a short period of time.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Dani K. White]

But it's also a way for me to go. I'm just gonna do five minutes because I'll be five minutes better off because of the five minutes that I do. Or I'm gonna prove to myself what I can do in five minutes. But like changing it from being like an attempt to trick yourself.

[Lindsay]

Right.

[Dani K. White]

Because that's my thing I rebel against. I'm like, I'm not. I don't like being tricked even by myself, you know, so if I think that's what I'm gonna be doing, it's like, no, I'm really, truly. I'm irritated right now. I'm frustrated. I feel like I'm at that tipping point that I've been at before. I'm just going to do five minutes, you know, and then. The power of the decluttering that you've done. Do things generally have a place like an actual place? Is, Is the majority of your stuff easy at this point or.

[Unknown]

It is for the, for the vast majority. I've gotten to the point where, yeah, if I ask the decluttering questions and, you know, I'm pretty ruthless with getting rid of stuff if it doesn't have a home. Also, if it's just like too much of a pain to put it, like, if, if it's not, if it's not worth it to me to take it there now, I just get rid of it.

[Dani K. White]

That's a, that's so completely valid because it, it reveals the value of something when you're like, oh, I'm not willing to walk across the house for this.

[Unknown]

You know, especially when you're like, if I'm upstairs in my bedroom on second floor and I realized that its home is downstairs in the basement in the storage room, and I'm like, I'm gonna have to go down and back up two flights of stairs each way. No, I'm not doing that. It's going in the. It's going in the bin. Yeah.

[Dani K. White]

Yeah. No, I think it's great. Yeah. So I, I would really zero in on the five minute pickup. I would. I don't know if your kids are in bed by the time you get home on these nights, but bringing them in on five minute pickups whenever possible. And your husband, if, you know, if that's a possibility. So, like bringing the whole family in on that. They are at the age where have y'all done five minute pickups as a family match?

[Unknown]

And the, probably the biggest challenge of the kids have with them is they don't like it if we get done with the five minutes and the room is not done. It's like some sort of a overwhelming sense of failure. Like they assume that I'm going to be upset if the five minutes are done and the room is not completely finished. So then we end up spending three of the five minutes arguing about, no, it will just be five minutes, I promise. It'll, it'll just be, you know, well.

[Dani K. White]

And that, that's something that will take time. You know, it may take several weeks of five minute pickups and also the reminder that the five minute pickup is the report card for whether or not you're under your clutter threshold, you know, so it's like, if five minutes isn't enough, then we need to get rid of some more stuff. But, you know, like, let's just do five minutes a day every day for this week so that we can kind of see, you know, first of all, hopefully get into that zone of like, oh, she really means five minutes. So I'm actually going to use those five minutes and all that. But yep, it takes time.

[Unknown]

My 8 year old is definitely like getting on the same page about it. Like, my five year old, he is just like, you know, he wants all his toys to be out like that. That's not a problem for him. He wants them all to be out all the time. But my 8 year old is very much getting to the point where she understands, actually, not only she thrilled that I'm, that I'm going to be on the podcast, because she listens to the podcast.

[Lindsay]

Oh, yay.

[Unknown]

But also this morning she was like, mom, it's getting to be close to Christmas. When are we going to go through the toys? Because every year before Christmas we go through and declutter all the toys in preparation for the new stuff that's coming in. And she told me she's like really looking forward to that because then there's not all the broken little random bits in the toy bins and like that kind of.

[Dani K. White]

I love it.

[Unknown]

So she's, she's seeing the positive of everything, which is good because sometimes decluttering with kids can be kind of excruciating. But yeah, oh, yeah, they're all starting to get a little more on board with that.

[Lindsay]

Yeah.

[Dani K. White]

And the only thing that works for that is keeping on doing. I was gonna say consistency, but even I think sometimes we get freaked out by that idea of cons. I've just gotta be consistent. It's like, no, no, we just gotta do a five minute pickup today and then tomorrow we'll do one when we think about it, you know, that kind of thing. So I would just really say try to match that feeling of, oh no, it's all over with. I'm gonna do a five minute pickup, an actual five minute pickup and see what happens. Just as an experiment, you know.

[Unknown]

And I think sometimes for me it's hard to shift my ideal. Like in my mind the ideal is that my house is not only like company ready, but like magazine photo ready at any moment. Like that's, that's this picture that I have in my head. But really, honestly, I can settle for being a five minute pickup away from company ready at any. Like, that would be really a better goal. But I struggle with like this perfectionism of like, but what if someone's going to come in and they want a tour of my, you know, basement storage closet? You know, like, I want it to be perfect all the way through and I'm just, it's maybe not as realistic.

[Dani K. White]

Yeah. I would really focus on. So you said you've come a long way.

[Unknown]

Yes.

[Dani K. White]

And you do a lot of hosting.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Dani K. White]

What is your stress level now for hosting compared to your stress level in the past?

[Unknown]

So I mean, it used to be. We've always hosted a lot, but it used to be hosting consisted of gathering up all the stuff from around the house, putting it in laundry baskets, throwing it in the master bedroom, locking the door, throwing it in the closet, Lock it, you know, so basically it was just creating doom boxes and piles, hiding those, doing a long clean of the kitchen because I had to get through all the backlog of dishes, whatever. So it would be, you know, a process to get to the point where I would want to have people over. And there were always rooms. I was definitely afraid of people opening the doors too. And several of them usually. And now it's to the point where if I know that people are coming in an hour, I could have the house looking quite presentable. Now I will say, like, the kids bedrooms tend to be kind of maybe the last holdouts of clutter because I don't spend a lot of time in the kids bedroom. So. But I'm also like, you know what, I don't know if the people that are showing up from church are going to care if my kids bedrooms are clean on the second floor. But we can get all the main living areas of the house company ready probably in an hour, which is, I'll acknowledge, a vast improvement. I still want it to just be like, but I walk home from, I walk in the door from work and it's like a hotel, you know, like.

[Dani K. White]

Yeah, I just, I don't think. And I'm. I know, you know, that's not realistic, right? Like, I know, you know, so, so it's, it becomes that issue of how do I change my focus to appreciating that I'm at the point where a five minute pickup can make a difference, you know, So I mean, I would recommend that you try the before and after five minutes photos for a week or two, you know, and just, just to show yourself and really start to get it in your mind the power of the five minute pickup for your home that is for the most part decluttered. Right. Like so, So I think it's that acknowledging it used to be a huge ordeal to have people over and I had people over, which meant I was living with a constant, you know, like, okay, when is somebody coming over and I'm going to have to do the, you know, the whole house overhaul thing and I don't have to do that anymore, you know, but, but it just, I think it's that the five minute pickup is the answer, right? Like, it just, it just is. And so, so giving yourself some visual proof of that and make a folder on your phone when you start to have these frustrations and be like, oh, no, no, oh, that's right, I can get it back in five minutes.

[Unknown]

Or, you know, and maybe part of it is just kind of attempting to give myself the grace that like, it doesn't need to be. Like, the fact that it gets messy sometimes is not some sort of moral failing. Because whenever one of my friends will invite us over and they'll be like, oh, I'm sorry, my house isn't like, I don't care. Like, it doesn't bother me, but I project that. Like, of course everyone expects my house to be immaculate at all times. So.

[Lindsay]

Right, right, right.

[Dani K. White]

And to know that maybe the friend whose house you don't care about, maybe they need to see that that was one of my things, is I realized how many people in the world struggled with this and I went, okay, my goal doesn't need to be perfection. My goal needs to be function.

[Lindsay]

Right?

[Dani K. White]

And so if my goal is function and I can have people over and I did miss something, I did not have time to deal with something and there's a pile here or, you know, spiderweb here or whatever. Then I just go, okay, maybe they needed to see that. Maybe they needed to see that my house isn't perfect all the time. I don't know that anybody has ever expected my house to be perfect all the time, but you know what I mean. Yeah, I try to shift my thinking that way.

[Unknown]

Yeah, that's fair. Yeah.

[Dani K. White]

So what's another situation you want to talk about?

[Unknown]

Okay, so I have, like, I will tell anyone that asks or doesn't ask about the where would you look for it first rule. Because it has been life changing for me as someone who really didn't understand the idea of like, a place for everything. Like, I thought having a place for everything just meant you had physically the cubic footage for everything. Not that you, like, had a, you know, a specific place for like, this one thing to go, which then it.

[Dani K. White]

Makes it impossible when you feel like your house is not big enough.

[Unknown]

Right, exactly. So when we moved into this house, I had already been a follower of the your methods for long enough that like, that's how I determined where stuff went when we moved into this house. Was like, okay, where would I look for this? The problem a little bit, which I realize this is like such a first world problem, is, like, we tend to have spaces in our house that are just like, very underutilized. Because, like, there wasn't even maybe there wasn't like a one for one analog of our old house to our new house. And so it's like, here's a whole closet we never had before. I wouldn't instinctively have thought to look there for anything versus we have this one coat closet in our mudroom where it's like where my brain often would look for random things. Painting supplies and flashlights and we've got cleaning supplies in there and coats and shoes and. But just like, it's kind of a. I'll look for everything there first. That's. And so I guess my question is, is there a way to sort of purposefully change the location of some things without sort of wrecking the where would I look for it first? Because it's like, I don't want to just lose stuff or fill space just to fill space. But I also, like, it would be really helpful if my. My mudroom could be mostly for coats and not for other things, you know?

[Dani K. White]

Yeah, no, I. I think naming the spaces would go far. Like, and it might take a little bit. Right. Like, it might take a minute of where would I Look for it first I went, wait a minute. No, I have a. We have a room like that, right? Like, we have an actual room that I. For some reason, I love it so much because it reminds me of my grandma's basement. And we don't have basements in Texas. And so. Yep. Yeah. So, but I love. We call it our stock room. I think it's actually a Seinfeld reference. But anyway, he's like, oh, where's the stock room? Anyway? But like, we never had a space like that before, but calling it the stock room. Because when we first moved in, we'd be like the room behind the laundry room. And, you know, but it's like, no, no, the stock room. So that's where we keep our extra toilet paper, extra paper towels, extra, you know, all that kind of like. And it just becomes that thing. So it's like for you, if you say this is the coat closet, this is the identity of this closet, and this is the craft supply closet, and you start calling it the craft supply closet, you refer to it as the craft supply closet, you show it to your kids, and you say, this is the craft supply closet. And you, when you do crafts, you're like, okay, go put it back in the craft supply closet. I think giving it that. That name, you know, not that you can't have something that is, you know, oh, well, we keep our painting supplies in the coat closet. You know, I mean, like that. But even just giving it that name.

[Unknown]

Yep.

[Dani K. White]

Means that this is its primary function and that I think that helps in a new house.

[Unknown]

Yeah. I mean, I think something that frustrates me is, like, we have the shoes, and shoes are just their own. I don't know, they're just a whole. They're. They're a problem. But like, we have the shoes in the bottom of our coat closet. But, like, that's also where we keep our mops and brooms and things. And sometimes it's literally just me going in and, like, tossing all the shoes back into the shoe closet and then I'm trying to shut it, and then the broom handle is. And the problem is I. Like, that's where, like, that's where I want my cleaning supplies to.

[Dani K. White]

Because that's fine, right? That's perfectly fine. Like, and that's what I'm saying is if this is the coat closet and we keep our broom in the coat closet. Ok, but you said brooms and mops. Yes. Okay. So is it possible that if it's going to be the coat closet, the reality is we Only have room for one mop and one broom because it's a coat closet. If we had a mop and broom closet, then we've got room for multiple mops and brooms. But the reality is it's the coat closet and I keep my mop and broom in there, and if I try to keep more than the bare minimum on that, then that's when they all fall out. Does that make sense?

[Unknown]

Yeah, no, that's. That's fair. I. I've. I've even tried relocating the shoes out of that closet because, like, you know, because that's kind of where I have all my cleaning supplies and stuff set up. We have, like, hooks that the kids coach can go on. So I've actually kind of tried to solve the problem the opposite direction, which is like purging down the coat closet stuff so it can effectively just be a cleaning closet. But then the shoes are just like, everywhere because we can't keep any, like, nitpicky shoe organization system will fail. Anything more than just sort of a bucket or like a toss it in the closet kind of a situation.

[Dani K. White]

So this becomes one of those things where tackle it every day on purpose for seven days. So, like, for seven, say for this week, I am going to put the shoes in the place where I look for shoes. I'm going to deal with the shoes every day for seven days so that they don't, you know, I don't know about you, but it becomes a sea of shoes, right. When people just kind of kick them off in the general direction of something of the space where you, in your mind they're going. So it's like, I'm going to deal with these shoes. We're going to deal with them every day for seven days. And then as you do that, you're going to see what's working, what doesn't, what's causing the problem, and be able to figure out how this will work better in your home. Yeah, but it's fine to say we put our coats in the cleaning supply closet. Like, that's fine too, you know, I mean, like. But giving it an identity of saying this is its name might allow you to use that other closet.

[Unknown]

Yeah. Kind of on the opposite end of the spectrum, like, we have a big closet in our master bathroom that's basically underutilized. We use one shelf of it where we keep extra pillows, but then the rest of it is just kind of like a clutter magnet because it has no purpose. Like, I don't like to keep towels in there because, like, the kids need to get at the towels, and so I want them. And, like, I keep medicine somewhere else, and I keep. Like, I don't keep anything in it. And so then it just breeds just junk. And so for that one, I'm like, I'd like to find something to sort of relocate there, but I haven't yet figured out what that should be. I'm like, there's. There's pockets of, like, over the clutter threshold in the house, but then there's, you know, kind of the opposite. There's pockets of just, like, void. And void attracts clutter.

[Dani K. White]

So what. What are you storing in the basement that you have that is, you know, a trek to get there, that you're consistently going down to the basement to have to get it, and you get irritated because you're like, this is so far to go for something that we actually do use all the time. Is there something, a category like that that you could rename this space that?

[Unknown]

So probably the only thing that would fall into that category. My storage room is not full. Like, we have a small storage room in the basement. And literally, because I hate carrying stuff down to the basement so much, I just got rid of so much stuff that would have otherwise gone down there because I didn't feel like.

[Dani K. White]

Which is a totally valid option. Yes, that's a great solution.

[Unknown]

Probably the only thing that I really even go into the storage room for is, like, home decor. Like, if I'm going to. I don't know. I like to keep little things, but I'm kind of a minimalist at heart. So it's like I rotate things out. And so I have a couple of bins I've purged down to, like, two totes worth of, you know, doodads and knickknacks and picture frames and things that I might kind of rotate out. And those live in my storage room in the basement. And so that's really. If I'm like, taking down something, putting up something else, those are the things that I tend to haul in and out of the storage room or our Christmas decorations. But those are once a year. And I. I make my husband do that. So. Yeah.

[Dani K. White]

Well, I mean, I moved our Christmas decorations to our guest room closet.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Dani K. White]

You know, and I just said, this is a decent little closet. I mean, it's. It's not like, major walk in closet.

[Lindsay]

But you can walk into it.

[Dani K. White]

Right. And I was like, here's some space. And it really helped me purge my Christmas stuff because. But I was like, no, this. My whole goal is That I don't.

[Lindsay]

Want to have to go out to.

[Dani K. White]

The barn to get the Christmas decorations. Like, so I would rather have fewer.

[Lindsay]

Christmas decorations that will fit in this space.

[Dani K. White]

And it's almost time.

[Lindsay]

As we're recording, who knows when this.

[Dani K. White]

Is going to go out? But as we're recording, like, it's getting close to time to think about that stuff. And I do have to go, oh, that's right. They're up in that closet right now. You know, like, oh, okay. You know, so it is an adjustment, but it helps that it was an identity that I gave it. Like, I named this my Christmas decoration closet.

[Unknown]

Yeah. And honestly, if I did it as a home decor closet, that would make sense because that's where that shelf of extra, like, throw pillows and stuff that I keep in there anyways, that's just because I don't want it getting yucky in the storage room because it's unfinished down there. So.

[Dani K. White]

Yeah, no, I get it.

[Unknown]

But that's a good idea. I should. I could do that. And then I would at least. Then I would at least get to look at the pretty things from time to time. Because that's. The other thing is, like, I don't keep a lot of them out because again, I've learned my clutter threshold cannot be lots of little vignettes everywhere on every surface. But then it does make me kind of sad because there are a few things that I've sort of like, you know, acquired and curated that I just don't look at very often. So at least if they were in a closet, I could see sometimes. Right? Yeah.

[Dani K. White]

Well, and who knows, that might make it easier to do the shifting and the switching out and all that.

[Unknown]

I. I genuinely don't do as much. I used to do a lot more kind of rotating things and decorating for the seasons, and I don't do as much just because of life and chaos, but also because it's a pain. So.

[Dani K. White]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Lindsay]

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[Dani K. White]

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[Lindsay]

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[D]

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[Dani K. White]

Okay, let's talk about something else. Okay, so that sounded like a weird transition. Sorry. Let's talk about something else.

[Unknown]

That's fine.

[Dani K. White]

Let's talk about another situation that you wanted to cover.

[Unknown]

Yeah, so like I mentioned before, one of my main struggles with clutter is kind of my. My tendency towards doom boxes. You know, just like the can't make decisions, don't have time, whatever it is, throw it in a bin. Laundry baskets are my favorite personally. And, you know, then they just end up everywhere. And I've gotten to the point where I've purged out all the doomboxes. My garage was really, it was the final frontier. I mean, no house I have ever lived in as an adult have we been able to park a car in the garage, including this house, for, you know, the first two and a half years. So this summer, we tackled the garage as a decluttering project. And we had already, like, we had done it in phases before, you know, where we would work on it. We'd go through. We just kind of layer by layer. But we finally, we went through every box and got rid of a bunch of stuff, you know, filling the car, going to Goodwill, and pitching tons of stuff or whatever. So that was very exciting because now, I mean, honestly the real reason is I got a new car, like a car that I actually cared about and I wanted to park it in the garage. So there was some, there was some external, but you know, we got it to the point where it could put the car in. We've got the kids bikes, we've got like an area for tools and whatever. The problem is I have really determined the source of my doomboxes now is crap that comes out of the car. Because there's a lot of days where we're, I'm dropping the kids off at school, I'm going to work, I'm going to meetings, I'm picking the kids up from school, I'm bringing them back to church with me because I have rehearsals at night and they're going to hang out in my office and they're going to, you know, whatever. So there's a lot of days we are just either not home at all or it's a quick drop the kids off, trade them with my husband, go, do, you know, back and forth, sports, whatever. And so the car is kind of our home away from home. And it's usually trashed. Like even, you know, even if my house is immaculate, my car is probably just trashed. Then it'll be like, oh, I need to give so and so a ride. My car can't be trashed. Oh no, I forgot about it until just now this second. Quick, I'm gonna take a, you know, a grocery bag and fill it with things, you know. And so then there will be bags and boxes of car vomit and they work their way into the garage or into the mudroom or occasionally they make it all the way back up to my bedroom. But it's like I just can't figure out how to conquer the clutter in my car. And then it's sort of, you know, the way it extrapolates everywhere else, it is just, you know, a source of endless frustration. So I don't know if you have any advice for that.

[Dani K. White]

So I've got some theory advices, but in reality, advices.

[Lindsay]

What?

[Dani K. White]

I've got some theory advice. Theory based advice. In reality, I struggle with my car big time. Right, okay. But what I'm hearing you say is that you have your garage under control to where you can park to cars in it. You're very excited about that. That is valuable.

[Unknown]

Right?

[Dani K. White]

But then cleaning out the car in a hurry causes the issue. Right? So idea would be, okay, can I have a trash can right where my Car is.

[Unknown]

Right?

[Dani K. White]

Like, can I. Even if it's a small trash can, is there a way I can have a trash can there and then a container for the stuff that I have to throw out? I mean, that I have to pull out of the car quickly and needs to be put away. Right? So that ideally, in an ideal world, you would throw things away and then take things immediately to their homes. But we all know that it generally what you're talking about, and I know this from my own personal experience, is like, oh, my word, I have to go pick somebody up right this second.

[Lindsay]

Right?

[Dani K. White]

And so I literally am just. So it's like, so if there's a trash can, then it's as easy to throw stuff into the trash as it is into the bin, the container of stuff to deal with that I'm gonna have to deal with later. So that it's just there, and then that is a defined space that is for that purpose, which then hopefully would trigger when, oh, my goodness, I've done this three times now, and this bin is, like, starting to get overflowing. I've got to go put things away. Yeah, I don't know.

[Unknown]

No, that would be helpful, actually. I can picture a universe. We have, like, a tool bench, but we're not tool people. Like, we have a tool bench for the rare occasion when we need to fix something. But it's right next to where I park my car in the garage. And that is typically where I just pile stuff. But I could put. There's like a little opening underneath. I could put a trash can under there. I almost wonder if I could have a bin for stuff that is not trash, but I need to put it away. And then maybe I'll put, like, a little bin for dishes, because we are an eat breakfast in the car family most days of the week, because that is just how life goes. And so then a lot of times, my, you know, my fun piles of doom end up including trash school papers that I didn't have time to deal with right at that moment, the kids, toys, random articles of clothing that they've discarded. I don't. I really don't actually know how that happens. Like, are. Are they stripping in the car? Why do we have pants in the car?

[Dani K. White]

Sometimes we just can't ask the questions. We just. We don't want to know the answers.

[Unknown]

Like, there is an unconscionable amount of laundry that just generates from my car. But. But specifically, dishes are one thing that are an endless source of frustration because, like, my car will just. All of A sudden develop a smell, and it's like, oh, it's actually because so and so was eating a bagel on the way to school, and then they didn't finish it, and so they shoved it under the front seat of the car. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've. I've gotten to the point where sometimes I just throw dishes away if I find them having been in a box covered.

[Dani K. White]

Yeah. I don't know. I get it. And I. I think I get what you're saying. I would start with one with trash in one container. Okay. Because otherwise, the more containers you have, the more stuff you can put in there, the more you can hold off. Right. And so if. If our goal is for it to not be something that grows and grows and grows and instead is a trigger that, oh, my word, I've got to go put these things away in this moment. I would go with as minimal. That's fair opportunities for putting things out. And I get what you're saying. Right. But. But the goal would be that that container. And it's not.

[Lindsay]

Be huge.

[Dani K. White]

Right. But that that container would be small enough that it would be trigger that it needs to be dealt with. And I would deal with it before the dish got to the point where I just needed to throw it away.

[Unknown]

Yes. Well, I think part of it stems from, like, you know, I love that your method does not include keep boxes, but also a keep box is just like my spirit animal. Right.

[Dani K. White]

I know.

[Unknown]

Just, you know, it's all.

[Dani K. White]

But your keep box is what got you into this.

[Unknown]

It is.

[Dani K. White]

Right. So that's the thing is we don't want this to turn into a keep box.

[Unknown]

Yes.

[Dani K. White]

And so it really is just for the reality that. And again, as I said, this is based in theory because my car is a disaster.

[Lindsay]

Right.

[Dani K. White]

Like, so. And it always is. And I never try to pretend like I've got the answer for you on the car. Like, we're just kind of brainstorming here on what, you know, what to try. Dana.

[Unknown]

I'll even settle for, like, I've kind of given up on my car not being a disaster most of the time. It's really just, like, it's mostly frustrating when that message breeds and then it moves back into the places in my house that have been under control otherwise, like, you know what I mean? That's what I feel like, because I have.

[Dani K. White]

Which is the reason for the container is the reason for the. For the limiting how much can get to that point.

[Unknown]

Yes.

[Dani K. White]

And the other thing, too, is the experience that I do have is that emptying the doom boxes also helps me to identify things that are going to end up in a doom. You know what I mean? Like to. I did before it comes into my house. So. So like the, the going through that, the pain, the frustration of it helps me to identify things that, you know, what if I would throw this away now or if I would deal with this thing now, it won't get to this point and it helps me in the future.

[Unknown]

Yeah, I think like I found this is kind of unrelated, but I found that laundry again because the car generates laundry. Laundry in anywhere of my house other than like our laundry is on the second floor. That's where our washer dryer is. That's where all of our bedrooms are. So when I moved into this house, I had this naive belief that there would never be laundry anywhere else in the house other than on the second floor because that's where all the bedrooms are, that's where the bathrooms are, that's where the laundry washing machines are. And so when I find like doom boxes in my garage full of dirty laundry, I just think why and how. And like, I don't know, it's. It's just so fun.

[Dani K. White]

Well, and it kind of. So one thing to do on that would be like, are your kids involved at all in the gathering of clothing for laundry day?

[Unknown]

Not really. They help put away clothes. So I will like, I don't separate by kid like before I do the laundry. So then after it's washed, I put it in a basket for each of them and I have them put away. But I don't usually have help before then.

[Dani K. White]

Well, maybe, maybe seeing if there's a. Let's everybody bring me your clothes. Your dirty clothes. And if there's a way to remember to go get clothes out of the car, you know, like that's one of the places that we need to be gathering clothes from for laundry day. Because this is a consistent thing.

[Unknown]

Yeah, yeah. Because I, I found dirty clothes in our pantry before. My five year old especially thinks it's hilarious to just bring his, you know, bring his new outfit for the day somewhere in the house behind any closed door he might be getting.

[Dani K. White]

That's hilarious. And I. That's reality.

[Lindsay]

Yep, yep.

[Dani K. White]

No, I mean I've. I've got one who's moved back home and I'm like, where are all these socks coming from? That are just like.

[Unknown]

I got to the point, I got to the point where when I was starting to really do laundry day more consistently, I had had just like this big basket of socks that don't have a mate. I mean, a large basket of socks that don't have a mate, you know? And I'm like, every load that's coming through, I'm trying to. I just. I eventually threw away the whole basket. I'm like, this is dumb. I'm not doing this anymore. Why do I have all these socks? That. And it hurt my soul. And. But it was so freeing because now, like, I don't. I don't have that anymore. But also now I'm like, why do we even have to own so many socks? Like, do it for real.

[Dani K. White]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

But I think my. My husband gets a little bit scared sometimes because I'll get a mood. I'm like, ruthless.

[Dani K. White]

Yep. Well, this has been fun. Have I solved all of your problems?

[Unknown]

Every single one. Yes. That's. Also, do my Christmas shopping for me. That would be great.

[Dani K. White]

Okay, that actually sounds fun. Okay, so tell me, what is your favorite thing about being a kindred spirit?

[Unknown]

So, by far, it has been kind of like the validation of having a group of people who think the same way that I do, who will not judge if I post a picture of my house messy or clean. Like, you know, I just. They're always relentlessly positive. And honestly, there are so few spaces on social media that are like that anyways.

[Dani K. White]

Right.

[Unknown]

So just having, like, a whole group of cheerleaders that are like, whatever it is. Whatever is, you know, tripping me up or whatever, I need to celebrate. Like, they're just there for it. And that has been just so positive and so encouraging. I love it.

[Dani K. White]

I'm so glad. Tell me, like, I've got one more question.

[Lindsay]

Right.

[Dani K. White]

No, that was. Well, I was awkward there, wasn't I? Anyway, no. This has been so fun. I appreciate so much you coming on the show and being willing to share with the world what you're working on. And it's so fun to hear the progress that you've made.

[Lindsay]

Right.

[Dani K. White]

Like, that is so encouraging, I think, to people.

[Unknown]

Well, when I applied to be on this show, you know, I don't know. I think it was over a year ago. One of the questions I had put was, I don't know how to get through my garage. I don't know how. Like, that was one of my biggest frustrations. And, like, I've dealt with that now. Like, that's not actually a problem for me anymore. And it's just kind of this. Like, you know, there are seasons of life that are just chaotic, and I'm just in maintenance, and I've learned To kind of accept that. That there will be, you know, seasons where I just. I don't feel like I'm making progress. I'm just continuing keeping up, and that's okay. But then I've learned to. To try to take advantage of the little bits and snatches of time or the seasons where things are just a little bit calm between the storms. And I found, like, it really is encouraging because even on days when I feel like my house is chaotic and it's trash and it's never going to be clean ever again, then it's like, okay, I've worked on it. Maybe I'll work on it for a couple hours. And it's like, it's good. And it's. Sometimes it's good for me to remember to, like, look back and think of how far I've come. And in some ways, like, I want to again, I want it to have been, like, tricky, you know, I want it to have been like, oh, well, there was this, you know, this secret that I, you know, this equation that I just had to fix. No, it's like I just had to do the thing and then do it again and then do it again and get rid of stuff and get rid of more stuff. And my best friend kind of makes fun of me because I've gotten to the point where, like, my kids bring home an endless supply of paper from school. You know, they're all three in school now, and, you know, we'll get through their. Their Friday folders at the end of the week or whatever. And I go through, and I'm like, yep, yep, yep, yep. And I might pick. I usually try to pick, like, one thing that is gonna go in there, like, little. I have a. Like a sentimental box for each of them. But, you know, one thing, I keep one thing, and then everything else gets read and pitched. And even that mentality shift is so huge because I used to hold on to every single sheet of paper that came into the house from, you know, the kids would spill on a sheet of paper and I'd be like, oh, immaculate. And I keep it. And so just, you know, feeling the shift in my own tendencies has been huge because, you know, I think a lot of sort of the slob problems is like, it's kind of coming to grips with your own self and your own personality. And so, yeah, you know, being part of the kindred spirits, seeing that I'm not alone, but also seeing that, like, it is possible to change sort of the defaults, and it's possible to kind of change the baseline so positively has been very encouraging for me, and I think it clears up a lot of mental space. Like, you know, my job in life requires so much sort of mental and emotional energy a lot of times. And not having just kind of this constant background noise, wondering, am I going to have clean clothes for the kids to wear tomorrow? Are we going to have. Am I going to have a clean pan to cook dinner with tonight? Like, it just not having to think about it is so freeing.

[Lindsay]

Yep.

[Dani K. White]

I love it. I love it. That's huge. I mean, I think that's the power of all this. So I appreciate you so much. Appreciate you coming on the show.

[Unknown]

Well, thank you. I appreciate you and everything that you have done to equip all of us. It's amazing. Thank you.

[Dani K. White]

All right, Danielle. Love that conversation. I just had so much fun, and.

[Lindsay]

There really is no secret. Don't we all wish there was a secret? But there's not.

[Dani K. White]

Don't forget, if you want to find out more about being a patron, go to Patreon. P-A-T-R-E-O-N.com slob comes clean to find out more. Find out about our new perks and.

[Lindsay]

Levels, and we'll see you over there. Don't forget, take your house back on sale. A slob comes clean.com take. All right, I'll talk to y'all later.

[Dani K. White]

Bye.

[Lindsay]

Okay, y'all, I'm back to talk about my new book that comes out February 11th of 2025. If you've ever wondered how I put these current things in with old podcasts, that's one of the features that my ad network allows me to do. And I'm very thankful for that because I know a lot of y'all listen to old podcasts, and I don't want you to miss exciting things that are coming out like the new book. This book is called Jesus doesn't care about your messy house. He cares about your. And this is a departure for me for sure. So my first three books did not contain spiritual content, and that was on purpose. And this book talks about why. Ultimately, this is a book about God's grace, what it means, and how it plays out in life. And I'm using this example that feels both too unimportant and too daunting from my own life to explore what grace is. My hope is that exploring this topic, finding out what the Bible really says and how Jesus really views you will remove the shame around this issue so that you can move forward.

[Dani K. White]

Also want to make sure you know.

[Lindsay]

That if you pre order there are pre order bonuses. So I'm going to talk real quickly about what those are.

[Dani K. White]

You can pre order from anywhere.

[Lindsay]

You can even request it from your library and send us an email and.

[Dani K. White]

Let us know that pre order it.

[Lindsay]

From anywhere and then go to aslobchemsclean.com Jesus.

[Dani K. White]

And there's actually links there of places.

[Lindsay]

To pre order if you haven't yet.

[Dani K. White]

But you'll go to the the form.

[Lindsay]

There and fill out your information with.

[Dani K. White]

Your pre order number and information from your receipt.

[Lindsay]

Okay, so just so you know, we don't have any way of knowing that you pre ordered, okay? We don't get any information about you from the place where you bought the book. They don't send us any information about you.

[Dani K. White]

So the only way for us to know that you have pre ordered is.

[Lindsay]

For you to come and fill out this form.

[Dani K. White]

And they are all digital and they're downloadable, meaning you're going to get them immediately.

[Lindsay]

Now they don't come with your book and again we only can give them.

[Dani K. White]

To you if you tell us that you've pre ordered and give us your information. But what are the bonuses?

[Lindsay]

Well, the bonuses include a preview of.

[Dani K. White]

The book, it's the first two chapters.

[Lindsay]

And then also a five day Bible study based around the theme of the book. And then the last thing is not downloadable because it'll be an invitation that you'll receive to a live Q and A exclusively for those who have pre ordered. So here's how this is going to work. I am going to do three categories of Q and A's and for each category I'm going to do two sessions. Okay, so there will be a daytime and an evening for each of these sessions to hopefully allow you to make.

[Dani K. White]

It to one of them. But the three categories are divided out.

[Lindsay]

To hopefully meet everybody where they are.

[Dani K. White]

Because I know that people are at.

[Lindsay]

Very different places on this side of this journey. Okay, so the three categories are I'm all in.

[Dani K. White]

Like you get it, you hear the title, you read the book and you're like, yep, I'm all in. I want to talk more about this.

[Lindsay]

That's the first category. The second category is I've got questions.

[Dani K. White]

Like, I think I know what you're saying, but I've got some questions about this.

[Lindsay]

We'll have two sessions for the people who are in that place in that category. And then the last category is no, nope, I'm out. But we're friends. And so you read the book and.

[Dani K. White]

So you pre ordered so you can.

[Lindsay]

Be invited to that one because I.

[Dani K. White]

Know that, like I said, we're all at different places and we want to be able to really have those conversations.

[Lindsay]

Those will not be recorded because I want to honor the privacy of those who are participating.

[Dani K. White]

So it will be something where that's.

[Lindsay]

Why we're doing each of them twice, so that hopefully you can make one. We'll send out the invitations to those sess probably about a week after the book releases to give people time to get into it and start. Start reading. So that when we have those discussions, we're, you know, talking about the same thing. So I would love for you to pre order if this is a book that you would be interested in or somebody you know would be interested in. Pre orders are so helpful for authors. So I greatly appreciate you doing that. But ultimately I just want it to be a book that is helpful for you. You can go to a slob comes clean.com Jesus.

[Dani K. White]

Both for information on how to pre.

[Lindsay]

Order and or to fill out the form and claim your pre order bonuses. All right, I will talk to you later.

[Unknown]

Bye.