449: Removing Containers, Decluttering With Others, and More of Your Questions Answered

Summary

Podcast Summary: Dana K. White's "A Slob Comes Clean" – Episode 449: Removing Containers, Decluttering With Others, and More of Your Questions Answered

Introduction

In Episode 449 of "A Slob Comes Clean," Dana K. White delves into practical strategies for decluttering and organizing your home, addressing listeners' questions with her signature reality-based approach. Released on March 13, 2025, this episode focuses on removing containers, decluttering with others, and tackling common organizational challenges. Dana provides actionable insights, supported by her personal experiences and expert advice, making the process accessible for those who struggle with maintaining a tidy living space.

1. Removing Containers: Streamlining Your Spaces ([00:00] - [01:44])

Dana kicks off the episode by addressing the first listener question: "When should we remove containers? How do I downsize and remove containers from this point, even though everything has a home?"

She introduces the concept of viewing each room as a container with a specific function. For example, in a dining room designed to host meals, the primary focus should be on the dining table and chairs. Any additional furniture, such as buffets or china cabinets, can impede the room's functionality.

Notable Quote:

“The number one thing that deserves space in any place is the human bodies, the people who live in it... Anything that makes it harder for the top priority thing to be able to be in this space needs to go.” – Dana K. White [01:44]

Key Points:

• Identify the Room's Function: Prioritize what the room is primarily used for.
• Evaluate Furniture based on Function: Remove items that hinder the room's main purpose.
• Impact of Removing Large Items: Eliminating bulky furniture can significantly enhance the room's usability and ambiance.
• Rearrange and Combine Storage: Shift items from removed containers to remaining storage solutions, ensuring only essential items stay.

2. Decluttering with Others: Harmonizing Different Organizational Habits ([03:00] - [12:55])

The next question explores the challenges couples face when decluttering together, specifically regarding having multiple storage spots for the same items.

Dana emphasizes the importance of coordination and communication. She suggests that it's acceptable to have duplicates for items that both partners use frequently, like screwdrivers or scissors. However, for items that don't require multiple storage locations, she advises assessing whether both spots are necessary.

Notable Quote:

“If you're the one who's going to remember where they put it first, then put it where you would.” – Dana K. White [07:30]

Key Points:

• Default Responsibility: Designate who is responsible for specific items based on who is more likely to remember their location.
• Personal Focus Before Joint Efforts: Each partner should declutter their own space and belongings independently before tackling shared areas.
• Function Over Ownership: Prioritize the functionality of the space rather than who owns which items.
• Flexibility: Adapt the system based on what works best for both individuals, ensuring it minimizes confusion and maximizes efficiency.

3. Managing Decluttering with Young Children ([13:19] - [22:28])

Dana addresses a particularly challenging scenario: decluttering while caring for young children. A listener shares difficulties in finding time to perform daily five-minute pickups due to managing an active 18-month-old.

Notable Quote:

“If you can't do five minutes, do two minutes, do a minute... what can I do in these five minutes without leaving this room.” – Dana K. White [17:45]

Key Points:

• Start Small: Even minimal efforts, like one or two minutes of tidying, can make a difference.
• Integrate with Child Care: Find ways to declutter without leaving the child unattended.
• Prioritize and Simplify: Focus on items that can be easily put away within the space you’re in.
• Be Patient and Adaptable: Recognize that perfection isn't achievable and celebrate small victories to maintain motivation.

4. Decluttering Strategies for ADHD ([22:28] - [23:16])

A listener inquires if Dana’s decluttering methods are effective for individuals with ADHD. Dana responds affirmatively, highlighting that her strategies are particularly beneficial for those with neurodivergence.

Notable Quote:

“It's the best method of decluttering for those with ADHD.” – Dana K. White [21:10]

Key Points:

• Structured Flexibility: Dana’s method offers a balance of structure and adaptability, catering to the unique needs of individuals with ADHD.
• Expert Validation: Dana references discussions with ADHD experts who endorse her approach.
• Personal Relevance: She shares how her methods have resonated with listeners facing similar challenges, reinforcing their effectiveness.

5. Tackling Sentimental Clutter: Old Photos and Keepsakes ([23:16] - [End])

The final question revolves around decluttering sentimental items, such as old photos and letters from deceased relatives. The listener seeks advice on managing these items without overwhelming emotional difficulty.

Notable Quote:

“This is the space that I have where I would look for food coloring that I'm never going to use. Then that's what helps me get rid of it, is I blame the container.” – Dana K. White [24:50]

Key Points:

• Start with Less Emotional Items: Begin decluttering with non-sentimental items to build momentum.
• Trash First Approach: Identify and remove obvious trash before tackling keepsakes.
• Space Limitation Principle: Use the designated storage space as a limit to determine what stays and what goes.
• Digitization Alternatives: For physical photos, consider digitizing them using a phone camera or professional services to reduce physical storage needs.
• Seek Assistance: Leverage help from younger family members or local services to manage technical aspects like scanning.

Conclusion

Throughout Episode 449, Dana K. White provides a comprehensive and empathetic framework for decluttering, tailored to diverse household dynamics and personal challenges. Her emphasis on viewing each room as a functional container, coupled with practical advice for collaborating with others and managing sentimental items, offers listeners actionable steps toward a more organized and serene living environment. Additionally, Dana’s acknowledgement of the unique needs of individuals with ADHD underscores the versatility and inclusivity of her methods.

Listeners are encouraged to implement these strategies incrementally, recognizing that small, consistent efforts can lead to significant transformations. For those seeking deeper insights, Dana’s new book, Jesus Doesn't Care About Your Messy House, explores the spiritual dimensions of decluttering, complementing her reality-based approaches discussed in this episode.

Additional Resources

• Dana K. White's Website: ataskdannykwhite.com
• New Book: Jesus Doesn't Care About Your Messy House – Available for purchase wherever books are sold.
• Hungry Root Offer: Exclusive discounts available for listeners (referenced in the episode).

Final Note

Dana closes the episode by thanking her listeners and encouraging them to leave reviews for her books, emphasizing the importance of feedback in reaching and helping more people through her decluttering journey.

Transcript

[Dana K. White]

Welcome to A Slob Comes Clean, the Podcast. I am Dana K. White. I share my personal deslobification process as I figure out ways to keep my own home under control. I share the truth about cleaning and organizing strategies that actually work in real life for real people. People who don't love cleaning and organizing. Thanks for joining me today. This is podcast number 449 and I think I'm going to call it Removing Containers Decluttering with others and more of your questions answered. So I'm answering questions that were submitted ataskdannyk white.com you can go there. They're not answered in real time, but I think you'll find these answers to these questions to be helpful for you to apply in your own situations that you face. All right, let's get going. First question, when should we remove containers? Like removing bookshelves, entryway tables, desks, buffets, china cabinets, etc. Everything finally has a home and a place. Wahoo. But it still feels like too much to manage. How do I now downsize and remove containers from this point? Even though everything has a home?

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[Dana K. White]

Yeah, so the way that you determine what furniture should go is by viewing your entire house and each room within it as a container as well. Right? So let's say that your your dining room, okay, because you mentioned specifically buffets and china cabinets. So assuming that those are possibly in the dining room and which I know not everybody has a dining room, but we're just using this as an example. Okay? So we have the the dining room and that room itself is the limit. Okay. Like it is the container. And the function of the space gets top priority in the container. So what is the function of this space? Let's say that it is to host dining parties. Or maybe it's where you as a family eat on a consistent basis. Like this is the place where you eat. That means the number one thing that has to happen in there is the eating, which requires the tables and the chairs to Eat on. Right? But the people deserve space, too. So if it is hard to move around in that space because of the excess furniture, which I'm picturing what my own dining room looked like at one time in my life, that the dining room itself was crowded with furniture because I had a buffet and a piano and a china cabinet. And, you know, like, I had all this stuff in this space, which meant that it was difficult to move our bodies into place around that table to actually eat, which meant that the number one thing that deserves space in any place is the human bodies, the people who live in it, or the pet bodies too, you know, but, like, the people who live there, we deserve the space first. And that's how I've rethought my entire home. And I go, okay, anything that makes it harder for the top priority thing to be able to be in this space needs to go. And so perhaps that is a. That. That. That is the way to look at it. Okay, is to say it is still hard to function in here. So what is it that's making it harder to function? Maybe the buffet is a little bit wider. And so it's the thing that's making it difficult to navigate around the table. Okay, then the buffet can go, which means, okay, what was in that space? Well, the space determines what can stay. And this is the room. And now we only have the china cabinet and not just the. The buffet. So now we look at everything differently and we go, okay, what was in the buffet? And that has to go into the china cabinet. Those two things have to be combined, which then it doesn't mean that we shove everything into that. It means that it naturally sorts out the reality of, okay, I had gold chargers, which is the, like the big gold plate to go around your fancy dinner plates. Right? I had those and, you know, six table runners and some tablecloths and some silver candlesticks and crystal candlesticks and a crystal ball. Those things were all stored in the buffet. And now I'm getting rid of the buffet. And when I get rid of the buffet, I have to decide, okay, now, in the china cabinet, it has. And I'm picturing my own, but it has storage for, you know, the. The nice dishes up on top. And then it has three drawers under that. Well, what's in these two drawers? What deserves the space in here more? Maybe I pick my favorite two sets of candlesticks, and those go in here. But that might mean that something that was stored in the china cabinet needs to be donated. Okay. Needs to leave the house and so I combine those things and I go, this is the space I have. This is what I'm going to, you know, get rid of. Because other beauty, beautiful thing is, if you get rid of a piece of furniture, the impact on your home is incredibly powerful. Like if. If you have felt a little cramped in your dining room before and you get rid of a large piece of furniture, of that buffet, it's amazing how the dining room feels like it grows in size. And the experience of being able to move around and sit around the dining table without feeling cramped or bumping into things, it's powerful. And it very well may help you reevaluate every other room in your house. According to what other furniture could I get rid of? Okay, but. But you. And you said it still feels like too much. So you, you get rid of things. Okay, bookshelves, things like that. But go according to really focusing on the room as a container. What is the function in here and what is making it hardest to function? Get rid of that. That may spur you to be like, you know what, there were three buffets in this room. I got rid of one that was amazing. I'm going to get rid of another one. Or you know what, actually, I'm going to get rid of the china cabinet tour, whatever it is, it might take you there, but start that way. Okay. All right, next question. Hubby and I are following your steps. We have different. If we were going to look for something, where would it the first place be? Places. So either we end up with two spots taking up precious room for something else, or one of us is struggling to remember where it is. Any thoughts or advice? Yes. So in this kind of a situation, it is fine for some things to have two places. You know, if you use a screwdriver and he uses a screwdriver and he would look for it one place and you would look for another place. Great, right? Like scissors or, you know, tape or something like that. Those things, it. There's no rules, right. It's whatever works. But you are saying it's taking up precious space. Right. So make sure that when you do put something somewhere, you are evaluating, does it even deserve to be here? The other thing though, that I will say on this is when you have more than one person, I default to who is the person who gets asked where the thing is. For some things in our house, that is my husband. For the majority of things in my house, it is me. And so therefore, if most of the time, most of the people are going to ask me where something is before they even look for it, then it's where I would look for it first. Right. However, if there is tension over this and you are the person who will remember where their place was, you know, maybe you're more zoned in on this subject matter of getting things under control and so you are able to remember where he said, you know, that was his first place to look for it, then I would go with that. I would go with his place. If you're the one who's going to remember. If he's the one who will more naturally remember where you would put it first, would look for it first, then put it where you would. Right. Like default to the one who most needs the put it where I would look for it first because I'll never actually remember, but then I'll look there and it'll be there. Which most of the time, the person asking me the question is the person more focused on all of this and therefore is the most likely to think about this. But remember too, like, really work on your own stuff, like as much as you can work on your own stuff and dealing with that before you get into these joint issues. Right. So if you are working on your own things that are yours are neutral things and you're getting rid of a lot of things, it's going to free up and not be quite so difficult along the line. I really don't recommend that you start out together. Like, even if you're both listening to this podcast right now and you're both on the same page about yes, we need to declutter, I would recommend that you each focus on your own things first just to kind of gain some of that. Wow, this works. While this makes an impact, I'm starting to understand that. 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[Dana K. White]

Requires upfront payment, taxes and fees. Extra terms and exclusions apply. Visit boostmobile.com for full terms. I have an 18 month old, 4 year old and 7 year old. I'm having the hardest time finding any time to do the 5 minute pickup each day because my cute 18 month old is so busy and destructive And I have to be next to her all the time to keep her alive. She's also a climber. I am barely able to do the dishes every day, but want to add the five minute pickup. I'm also having the hardest time taking it there now because of the cute said 18 month old. All right. Yeah. First of all, by the time you're listening to this, your kid's probably at least two by now, because like I said, these are not in real time answered. It goes so fast, as you know, because you have a four year old and a seven year old. This is a legitimately challenging time. And so I, I never want to go, oh, we'll just do this and everything. Like it's legitimately challenging. Right. If you can't do five minutes, do two minutes, do a minute. But here's the main thing. Try the five minutes and say, what can I do in this five minutes without leaving this room, without leaving the space and leaving this child alone, you know, to, to climb on something or whatever, you know, like if I need to be near her, what can I do while I'm near her? Because yes, there are things that you would need to take across to the other side of the house. Absolutely. There probably are things like that and those might be the first thing that you see. And it can be very frustrating when you're like, oh, I can't do this perfectly. But there is no perfect. There's no perfect. And there's especially no perfect when you have an 18 month old. So instead say, you know what, what can I pick up and put away? Because so many times things are somewhat near where they go without actually being where they go. Right. They may be in the same room. So take five minutes to say, is there anything that I can do without leaving this space? Even if you took her with you and she toddles and which I know 18 month olds can often move very quickly. A lot of them can. But even if you're taking her with you and you're doing five minutes and it feels like, I can't believe I it took me five minutes to move four objects to their home, y'all. That's four more objects than would otherwise be done because it took you so long because you took her with you, it's still worth it. Okay, do your strategies work for people who have cluttered homes due to having adhd? Our brains work differently. So we may need different strategies. Absolutely. Actually, I'm just gonna say it. My strategies work exceptionally well for those with ADHD and other types of neurodivergence. And this has been confirmed by many of you. And I had a podcast, I think maybe three weeks ago now, where I specifically spoke with an ADHD expert who explained why my methods work so well for those with adhd. So I. I was surprised myself. I mean, I know many of y'all have diagnosed me with adhd, but I've never officially been been diagnosed. But I was as surprised as anyone, more surprised than anyone when after Decluttering at the Speed of Life came out, I started getting emails that would say, thank you so much for your method. It works for me because I have adhd. And I was like, wait, what? You know? And so then I started, you know, talking to more experts, looking into more of that. And yes, this is. I'm just going to say it now. I created it, and it's my method, but I'm just going to say it. It's the best method of decluttering for those with adhd. So. Okay. And go listen to that one where I talk with Megs about why. All right, next, I need help getting rid of keepsake papers, old notebooks, greeting cards, travel brochures, and sentimental letters from deceased relatives. P.S. you have helped me. Okay. Love it. These are the hard things, right? Like, these are the hard things. So, number one, I would say if you have other stuff to declutter, go ahead and declutter that. Don't start with the most sentimental, emotionally daunting things. I mean, sentimental letters from deceased relatives, that's emotionally daunting. So make sure you're not starting there. Start in your most visible space. Do with other stuff that does not fit any of these categories of big sentimental stuff. Right? But when you get to this stuff, it's going to be the same method that I recommend for anything. The same no mess decluttering method. So what that means is if you have this stack of keepsake papers, first, you look through it and just see if there's any trash. There's probably not, but just see if there's any trash. A couple weeks ago, I talked about it is not possible to struggle with obvious donations and trash. Right. And that really applies here. That means I'm not saying look through it and try to get rid of some of it. I'm saying look through it and just see if there's any trash. Because so many times mixed in with keepsake papers is blank manila paper or envelopes or whatever. There's often other stuff mixed in and just look through it and say, I'm going to see if there is any Trash mixed in here, there usually is. And that means that the pile that used to be three inches high might go down to one and a quarter inches high because you got rid of trash. Even if you don't find any trash in it, it's still going to accomplish the purpose of look, look, always look, which is really, really powerful with this kind of sentimental stuff. And that is looking through it so that you now know what it is. So before it was like, those are keepsake papers. And some of them might be the letters that your grandmother wrote to your grandfather when he was overseas in a war. You know, I mean like, like that could very well be it, but it could also be some stuff that you don't even remember what it is. Or it could be some stuff that actually has no emotional value for you in there too. But you're going to know that because you non committally looked through it seeing if there was any trash. So go through that process. And then when you get to the point where you say, if I needed this keepsake paper, these letters that my grandmother wrote to my grandfather when they before they were married, if I needed this, where would I look for it first? So it's the same thing that I would say on the other words, which is the reason I don't ever ask the question, do I need this? Because this is the exact prime example of why that doesn't work for people like me, right? Because I'm like, well, technically no, but I'm not getting rid of it. So instead I say, where would I look for this first? I would look in the shelf of my closet where I keep sentimental stuff. Okay? So I'm going to take it there now and I'm going to face the reality of that space. I might be willing to get rid of some of my own stuff that I thought was sentimental and so I stuck it in there and now I'm like, oh my word, that's not sentimental. Actually, I don't care about the letter from so and so so and so that got passed to me, a note that got passed in history class in seventh grade, whatever, like, that I can get rid of. This is important to me. This deserves space over that, you know, so go through that same process, but it ultimately comes down to the container. So whatever that space is where you would look for it first, whether that's in a box or on a shelf, that is the limit. So if you have a lot of letters from deceased relatives and you have a limited space, like let's say it's a drawer And a desk. This is where I would look for it first. This drawer. Well, that drawer is a limited space and we've given priority in the container that is my house. We've given priority to the people who are currently living here and the life that they're currently living. Right? Like they get priority. That doesn't mean I can't keep these things, but it can't take up the space. Like I can't keep every single letter that was ever written by anyone who's ever been related to me since the 14th century because that would take up all the space that we need for my kids to have a bedroom and my to be able to sit around a dinner table and eat together as a family and all that. Like, I can't do that because, you know, I can't keep all of it. But this is the space that I have and that helps to sort out. You're like, okay, there are so many of these letters and all these things. Or maybe there's all these letters and then all of the papers that they wrote for this class and then there's all of this and you go, you know what? This is the space I have. This is the most important. And I let the container make the decision of what can be kept and what can't. It's very, very effective with sentimental stuff.

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[Dana K. White]

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[Dana K. White]

Love this next question. I have been decluttering for the past week or so and I have noticed that a lot of my stuff ends up under my bed or the dressers, etc. Is there anything I can put under them to ensure that things won't even fit? That's a. You have answered your own question. Absolutely. There are containers that you can put under the bed. Like look for under the bed. Look for under the bed containers. But you don't have to put anything in those containers just as a way to stop yourself from putting anything under there. Yes, you can Fill up that space with that. I think that's a great idea. How. This has parentheses. How end parentheses. Do you. Meaning, like, how do you. Or do you throw useful slash sentimental items in the trash? They don't fit in my container. I don't want them. I can't donate them, but I struggle to throw them away. I still have easier clutter to deal with. So maybe it will look different to me eventually. Yes, you're correct. Deal with the easier clutter first. No matter what it is, deal with the easier stuff first for you. And it will look different to you eventually. But when you get to these things, then we also go with the reality of the space. Okay. Oh, you gave some examples. Yes, you went on to give examples. I'll read those examples. Box of food coloring only use the green face paint. Crayons only use the black and white. A scrapbook of high school friends. I don't have contact with drawings and artwork I did in high school. Tassels I earned at graduation. That's a wide range of things, right? And so there is like, some people might come in and go, oh, you, you know, the food coloring isn't sentimental, blah, blah. But for some reason it feels difficult for you. So, yes, deal with the easier stuff first to build this up and it will look different. But as you get to these things, blame the space. Blame the space. So you go, the reality is this is the space that I have where I would look for food coloring. And it doesn't have the room to be functional and have this in there. So therefore, I need to get rid of it. I don't like getting rid of it. I don't like the fact that, you know, I didn't end up using all of this that I thought I would. The face painting, crayons, whatever, But I'm going to get rid of it. I am going to say too, I'm not sure about food coloring. Gonna say, probably you wouldn't be able to donate that. I don't know. Different places have different roles, but things like an unused face paint crayon, you can put that in a Ziploc bag and donate that. Right. But honestly, when you think of it that way, like I have to do one or the other. It's going to help you make your decision. Like, is it something you need to donate or is it something that, you know what? Honestly, I gotta just throw it in the trash. Because the fact is that the space you have is the space you have. So even though it's a good thing, that's actually Irrelevant here. The only thing that's relevant is this is the space that I have. It helps so much to not make value decisions, to not say, is this a perfectly good thing of food coloring? That's not the question I'm asking. I'm asking, do I have space here for food coloring that I'm never going to use? Then that's what helps me get rid of it, is I blame the container. Okay, last question. I'm wanting to clear out sentimental items. Many are old pictures. My husband says to scan them all and put them on the computer. I don't have my own computer, have a scanner, except his big one attached to a work computer. I'm concerned I won't be able to do the technical stuff. Any suggestions? I'm an older person, almost 70. That's not old. And so I have many generations of photos. I already know I will trash some as I don't even recognize the people. I'm not afraid to throw away photos. But of course, no donating here. I have them all in one closet. But I would really like to get more space in that closet. Okay. I think you have the great mindset going in. The fact that you're willing to trash photos makes me happy and tell you, and I can tell you for sure you're going to be able to do this right. Here's what I would do. First, I would go through them looking for trash. Like, since you said you are willing to do that, that is the first thing I would do. Because you will very likely find. Since you're willing to, you know, trash photos of people you don't recognize, you'll very likely find that if they are in three boxes, you could probably get it down to two boxes just going through and trashing. And I know some of the people listening are horrified right now thinking about trashing photos. I can remember my husband saying, I didn't know you could throw away photos. And he was literally talking about a picture of my shoe in 1984, like back in the days when we didn't know what we'd taken a picture of. Right. But yes, like, go through it. And. And the thing that happens too is in the beginning, you're like, oh, trash. Okay, yeah. You know, and then as you keep going and your brain is going, there are so many photos and this is going to take forever. And when I stick something in the trash, wow, it goes so much faster. You'll start trashing more. Right. So go through it and do that. And that's going to naturally bring it down to Being less stuff so that then it's less once it's. If it go. If it goes from three boxes to two boxes, it is two thirds as daunting of a project to even think about scanning them anyway. Right? Then you very, you very well could go from three boxes to one box. I don't know. But as you go through then you think, what is the actual easiest thing for me to do here? Here. Here's the problem. There can be fantastic ideas. Scanning them and putting them all on the computer, great idea. But if you don't know how to do that, or if that is daunting or you don't have the equipment, or you do have the equipment, you're not sure how it all works, that stops you in your path. And that's what we can't have. Right? Like, I'm always like, what does it take for me to move forward? Whether it's the ideal or imperfect thing to do or not, there are services out there that will scan your pictures for you. You could also probably ask your friends, you know, or ask. Ask some. One of your. If you have grandkids, maybe one of the teenagers or something, or your friend's grandkids or something that would be like, this would be a great job for them, right? Like there, that might be a solution. You might look up and see if there's a service around you. I know where I live, there's a little place that says we digitize your photos or something and take them there and have them do that. Or what I like to do, honestly, is I just take a picture with my phone of old pictures so it becomes a digital photo. And I'm not actually having to do the scanning process. I'm just taking a picture of the picture itself. It helps if I hang it on the wall because it helps with the lighting and the shadows more for me to be able to take the picture that way and I don't have the glare as if I. The same as if I'm like laying it down flat and trying to stand over it and take a picture. But yeah, I would say do whatever you have to do. So first go through it with trash. See if you can take a picture with your phone. And then if that's not a possibility, then see if there's a place locally and ask. You know, I'm always a big fan of asking, you know, on social media of your personal friends, say, hey, does anybody know of a place that will digitize photos for you? Because someone might know, or someone might say, hey, I do that on the side, and I never even told anybody. Okay. I just wanted to remind you that my new book is out. Jesus doesn't care about your messy house, and it is the spiritual side of my dislappification process. If you've read my other books, you know that I they don't contain spiritual content, and this book talks about why they don't contain spiritual content. So if you've read it, I would love it if you went and left a review wherever you purchased it. Because reviews are incredibly helpful in helping more people find the book. And the people who find it will know if it's for them by reading the reviews. So I hope this was helpful, and I will talk to y'all next week. Bye.