Podcrushed: Introducing "Don't Listen To Us"
Podcast: Podcrushed
Hosts: Penn Badgley, Nava Kavelin, Sophie Ansari
Date: October 29, 2025
Episode: Featuring the premiere episode of "Don't Listen To Us"
Guest Hosts: Mandy Patinkin, Kathryn Grody, Gideon Grody Patinkin
Main Theme
This episode of Podcrushed acts as a bridge, introducing listeners to the brand-new Lemonada Media show, "Don't Listen To Us." The new show, hosted by legendary actor Mandy Patinkin, his wife, actress Kathryn Grody, and their son Gideon, is an “advice show for advice skeptics and wisdom lovers.” Listeners are treated to the first, full episode, which blends heartfelt advice, family banter, reflective storytelling, and humor as the hosts tackle real listener questions about relationships, identity, aging, and vulnerability.
Key Discussion Points and Insights
1. Meet the Family (04:38–07:50)
- Setting: Recorded in Kathryn's upstate New York office, described as her "safe space."
- Introductions:
- Kathryn embraces her role as a "Jewish elder," seeks to reclaim and reframe aging.
- Mandy, now self-identified as “Gramps,” jokes about being more of a grandfather than a father these days.
- Gideon, the “wrangler,” reflects on being the youngest and a little less "crazy" than the rest.
- Quote:
- Kathryn: “I am trying to get rid of the concept of senior. ... I find it so insulting.” (06:09)
2. Listener Question 1: Over-Confident Partner (08:20–12:18)
- From: Kate and Keith
- Dilemma: How to handle a spouse who confidently states things as fact even when wrong (specifically, misidentifying a moth).
- Advice:
- Kathryn suggests picking battles and considering when it’s worth correcting a spouse.
- Mandy discusses self-growth post-pandemic, noting how lockdown softened his need to "be right."
- Humor and context are essential for a happy relationship.
- Quotes:
- Kathryn: “Pick and choose which is important to be corrective about and which doesn’t really matter, you know, and how intense the correction is.” (10:36)
- Mandy: “As pandemic faded, assholom came on both our parts, I must say.” (11:45)
3. Listener Question 2: The Bidet Controversy (12:41–15:46)
- From: Carl in Missoula, MT
- Question: Why don’t more Americans use bidets? Is American toileting barbaric?
- Responses:
- Mandy professes his “affinity” for bidets, exaggeratedly claiming lifelong usage.
- Kathryn points out global privilege—sometimes any working toilet is a luxury.
- Family recalls their switch to bidets, debating the bidet’s features (heated seat vs. actual washing).
- Anecdote: a glamorous movie star using newspaper instead of toilet paper for ecological reasons.
- Quotes:
- Mandy: “I beloved my bidet.” (13:37)
- Kathryn: “I think just a regular toilet is a lucky thing to have. ... But I don’t think it’s barbaric not to have one.” (13:38)
4. Listener Question 3: Coming Out as Trans (15:59–19:54)
- From: Ellis (via email)
- Dilemma: How to come out as trans to a loving but “nice Jewish dad” after 50 years of hiding, plagued by the sense of responsibility as “the family glue.”
- Drawing from Metaphor: Ellis dreams of being trapped in a shirt, asks for metaphorical “scissors” to set him free.
- Advice:
- Kathryn references the family motto, an e.e. cummings poem: “To be yourself in a world which is doing its best night and day ... means to fight the hardest battle any human being can fight and never stop fighting.”
- Mandy counsels: “Have a little faith in your father ... If he has a single cell of brain matter in his skull, he will be loving toward you ... Don’t hide it from your father. It doesn’t bode well for both of you for the long run. ... You’ll need each other more and more as time goes on.” (18:53)
- Kathryn beautifully imagines “handing your dad the scissors and having him ... say, ‘Let me help you be who you are.’” (19:54)
5. Live Caller: “Getting My Mojo Back” After Loss (26:17–34:14)
- Caller: Lori from Portland, 61, who feels unable to open her heart to love after losses and heartbreak.
- Discussion:
- Mandy shares a formative story of heartbreak and the wisdom (thanks to friend Leo) that “She loved you. It was her way, not your way. And it set me free.” (27:24)
- Kathryn encourages resilience, referencing the Japanese art of kintsugi—repairing broken things with gold—and says, “If you can feel despair, you can also feel joy.”
- Mandy: “Just have a great time. Have a great day. ... Don’t try to be with a person—for fuck’s sake, get a dog.” (33:29)
- Both stress the universality of wrestling with vulnerability and encouragement to “love yourself and ... be open to see what happens.”
6. Intergenerational Advice: Parents and Adult Children (38:43–45:29)
- Gideon Asks: How can parents give advice to adult children without it sounding naggy or preachy?
- Family Reflections:
- Kathryn: “I try to be really choosy with what I give advice on ... the tables turn, and you give me much more advice than I give you these days.” (39:08)
- Mandy: “I learn more from my two sons than I have to teach them.” (39:33)
- Critical Response Theory: Praising before critiquing; rephrasing criticism to be less direct.
- Candid Reflection: Mandy and Gideon discuss Mandy’s tendency to fixate on negatives, but realize that watching parents’ struggles let Gideon be freed from repeating that behavior.
- Memorable Moment:
- Mandy (tearfully recalling a breakthrough with Gideon): “I burst into tears because I finally realized that ... all of that self-torture I put myself through ... taught you never to do that.” (43:36)
7. Changing Perspectives with Age (45:35-53:05)
- Pat Asks: What have you changed your mind about in your older years?
- Mandy on relationships: “Sex is not the glue ... our relationship is the glue to our relationship. Time is the glue ... history is the glue.” (46:33)
- Kathryn: Gains more empathy for how little control one really has over the process of aging, embracing adaptability without seeing it as surrender.
- Aging with courage: Both discuss risk-taking in later life. Kathryn prefers to “go out mid-living,” resisting societal pressure to disappear; offers the metaphor of needing to “recharge her battery” now in her late 70s.
8. Closing Banter and Playful Wisdom (53:18-end)
- Advice Reversed:
- Kathryn: “I would like to just ask my beloved son if I ever have a suggestion about a medical expert that it might behoove him to say, you know what? Thanks for that ...” (53:31)
- Gideon pokes fun at his mother’s overzealous medical suggestions.
- Original Song Performance: Mandy closes with a playful, vaudeville-style song about therapy and advice. (54:32)
- Final Reflection:
- Mandy, joking about the show’s title: “...not to listen to the title that says ‘Don’t Listen to Us.’ Listen to Kathryn Hutters.” (53:26)
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments with Timestamps
-
Kathryn on "senior":
“I am trying to get rid of the concept of senior. ... I find it so insulting.” (06:09) -
Mandy on pandemic-era growth:
“I would say the pandemic improved my behavior exponentially. Wow. I became nicer in every way imaginable. ... I didn’t feel I had to win ... it was like a light switch.” (10:44) -
Kathryn's empathy to Ellis:
“If you’re 99% sure that your dad will be supportive, I think you should act on that. ... You will be the glue anyway.” (18:50) -
Mandy's direct comfort:
“Have a little faith in your father ... Don’t hide it from your father. ... If you have the courage to ask the hardest question, ... he’ll find it.” (18:53) -
Mandy on heartbreak and growth:
“She loved you. It was her way, not your way. And it set me free.” (27:24) -
Mandy to Lori (humor as healing):
“Just have a great time. Have a great day. ... Don’t try to be with a person—for fuck’s sake, get a dog.” (33:29) -
Kathryn's kintsugi metaphor:
“There’s that Japanese thing ... where you take broken things and mend them back together with gold leaf ... If you can feel despair, you can also feel joy ... you’re not numbing.” (30:43) -
Gideon reflecting on family patterns:
“Some of your biggest struggles in life have been my biggest benefits because I’ve gotten to watch what’s helped you and what hasn’t.” (44:18) -
Mandy's insight on relationships and intimacy:
“Our relationship is the glue to our relationship. Time is the glue ... history is the glue.” (46:33) -
Kathryn on aging:
“I have this image of a battery, you know, that you’re born with ... and then all of a sudden, just recently, I suddenly heard this ... It’s me and it’s my battery and it’s saying, you need to recharge me ... by taking a nap.” (51:27)
Important Segment Timestamps
- 04:38 — Family introduction and banter
- 08:20 — Emmy-winning confidence: Handling an over-confident partner
- 12:41 — The great bidet debate
- 15:59 — Coming out as trans, family glue, and finding courage
- 26:17 — Lori from Portland: loss, resilience, and reopening the heart
- 38:43 — Parents and adult children on giving and receiving advice
- 45:35 — Changing your mind as you age: sex, control, and legacy
- 53:18 — Advice reversals and family humor
- 54:32 — Mandy’s whimsical, sardonic closing number
Episode Tone & Takeaways
“Don’t Listen To Us” delivers on its dual promises: plenty of riotous, sometimes chaotic family banter, as well as legitimately thoughtful wisdom about intergenerational dynamics, loving others and oneself, growing older, and living authentically. The warmth and frankness of Mandy, Kathryn, and Gideon—along with a steady undercurrent of gentle teasing—help turn even difficult listener questions into inclusive, hopeful conversations.
For New Listeners
If you’re seeking advice with honesty, wit, and a ton of personality, this new show is likely to offer both comfort and comic relief—plus unexpected perspectives you may not have considered.
Memorable closing advice:
“Don’t listen to us... but maybe do listen to Kathryn’s advice.” (53:26)
