Podcrushed: Lola Kirke

Hosts: Penn Badgley, Nava Kavelin, Sophie Ansari
Guest: Lola Kirke
Release Date: December 3, 2025

Episode Overview

This episode welcomes actress, musician, and newly-minted author Lola Kirke, who joins the Podcrushed crew (including her brother-in-law, Penn Badgley) for a candid conversation about growing up in an artsy, complicated, and famous family; longing for belonging; wrestling with beauty standards; carving out her own creative path; and the joys, cringe, and heartbreak of adolescence. True to Podcrushed’s spirit, the chat is disarmingly funny, deeply reflective, sometimes vulnerable, and always relatable.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. The Wolf Pack Family & Feeling Like an Outsider

(08:20–15:00)

Lola describes her family in her memoir as “exceptionally good looking wolves, some of whom you might not want to meet alone at night.”
Her childhood home was “chaotic, glamorous, territorial.”
Despite appearances, Lola always felt a bit like an outsider in the “pack”—“I feel like I’m really boring, have no personality, and totally approachable. But maybe other people don’t see me that way.” (09:40)
As a youngest child with a larger age gap from her siblings (especially Domino, 8 years older), she often felt invisible—a feeling that has shaped her both positively and negatively.

Notable Quote:
“I always knew that my feeling of being unseen growing up led me to not one, not two, but three careers in which I'm like, see me please. See me please. I’m so unsat. Please.” – Lola (20:09)

2. Birth Order, Belonging, and the Search for Identity

(15:00–21:30)

The hosts and Lola bond over all being youngest children—the “elite” position as per Sophie.
Lola reflects on watching her sisters (Domino and Jemima) from the sidelines, looking up to and sometimes being resented by them.
Her attempts to assimilate into American culture after moving from London to New York (at age 5), to avoid being bullied at school, only meant she got “bullied at home” for adopting an American accent.

Notable Quote:
“My desire to be seen was fueled by feeling very unseen as a child. But…when you want to make art, you don’t just want to be seen, but you want other people to feel seen too.” – Lola (20:25)

3. Family Background and Expectations

(25:40–28:49, 58:54–62:37)

Lola’s father, Simon Kirke, was the drummer and founding member of iconic rock bands Free and Bad Company.
Her mother, Lorraine Kirke, owned a famous vintage store, Geminola, in NYC’s West Village.
Expectations to pursue, and excel in, the arts felt less like encouragement and more like a mandate: “It wasn’t just, ‘be creative’—it was, ‘be successful in your field.’” (27:33)
They reminisce about their social circle’s downtown, bohemian New York scene—one “that can never exist again” in today’s corporatized, sanitized era.

4. Beauty, Body Image, and the Value System of the Arts

(38:18–47:40)

Lola shares the infamous story of a “10-pound replica of fat” being displayed on their dining room table—symbolizing the family’s fraught relationship to weight and appearance (38:34).
- “I definitely went from a beauty conscious household into beauty conscious industries.”
The group discusses how Hollywood/arts culture presents itself as rebellious but ends up reinforcing the same old values, just “with a leather jacket.”
Lola reflects on internalizing aggression and self-improvement, quoting Pema Chödrön: “The desire for self improvement is a form of aggression towards ourselves” (40:18), and finding new peace with her body and self-image.
She brings up the feeling of relief seeing aging actresses “with lines on their faces”—contrasted with the alienation of “weird” cosmetic procedures (47:23).

Notable Quotes:
“I am on this earth to do more than just be pretty.” – Lola (41:47)
“We live in a society that has made youth into a commodity and values that above all else... Being young breaks my heart.” – Lola (48:53)

5. Adolescent Heartbreak & Cringe

(65:01–72:15)

Lola talks about her childhood loves (musicians like Julian Casablancas and Heath Ledger).
- Cherished memento: a Strokes autograph signed by Domino, her sister, on her behalf (66:18).
Cringiest adolescence memory: Trying to emulate the film “Darling,” she buys a Siamese fighting fish as an accessory. At school, a cool kid seizes and eats her fish, retaliating with a Coke slushie poured over her after she dumps her fish’s water on his head.
- The “bully” later asks her to prom and—years later—posts a photo of her bare feet from the Golden Globes stage (“hometown girl makes good”) (71:04).

6. Craft, Career, and Staying Genuine

(34:32–36:37, 72:25–87:53)

After a career lull during Covid, Lola discovered a love for writing and storytelling—resulting in her memoir, Wild West Village (34:38).
Her experience in film vs. TV; on Mozart in the Jungle (“changed my life”) and working with Noah Baumbach and Greta Gerwig on Mistress America.
On being a professional actor: “Being an artist is humiliating, you know, when it’s not humbling… Learning how arbitrary that kind of value is when it’s placed on you when you’re doing well.” (36:37)
On the film Sinners: Working with Ryan Coogler and Michael B. Jordan, capturing musical performances, and the technical process.
She expresses gratitude for her sensibilities and friendships—reiterating the importance of found family and strong women in her chosen support system.

Notable Moments:
– Lola’s story about being babysat by Liv Tyler, who launched “Big Bellies of the World Unite,” making Lola feel body-positive as a child (51:51).
– Her observation on the industry’s obsession with beauty—“It’s a bandage on a bullet wound.” (45:13)

7. Songwriting, Country Music, and Fitting In

(92:34–97:34)

Though British-American, Lola’s love of country music comes from its humor, storytelling, and multivalent women: “It’s a lot of grit and glamour for women. They get to be tough and tender and mothers and glamorous.” (93:29)
Current songwriting explores growing up, societal pressures, moving past “just more songs about fucking” (95:59).
- “Sex is like water. It’s the best thing ever when you want it, but when you don’t, it’s just boring.” (96:37)
She’s now writing about family less, branching into other themes, and seeking her "own club" to belong to.

Memorable Quotes

“I always knew that my feeling of being unseen growing up led me to not one, not two, but three careers in which I'm like, see me please. See me please. I’m so unsat. Please.” – Lola (20:09)

“I am on this earth to do more than just be pretty.” – Lola (41:47)

“Sex is like water. It’s the best thing ever when you want it, but when you don’t, it’s just boring.” – Lola (96:37)

“We live in a society that has made youth into a commodity and values that above all else… Being young breaks my heart.” – Lola (48:53)

“As an actor, you can’t… it’s very hard to articulate… just how much you become identified with something that in some ways you were, like, not responsible for at all.” – Penn (78:12)

“As much as I worry about the way that I look, I never worry enough to really do that much about it... It's a bandage on a bullet wound.” – Lola (45:13)

Timestamps for Major Segments

08:20–10:39: Lola describes the “wolf pack” Kirk household, family dynamics, and childhood
13:49–15:21: Relationships with Domino and Jemima; bullying at home and school
20:09–21:30: The need to be seen, and its impact on creative longing
25:48–28:29: Parental background: rockstar father, boho mother, and artsy expectations
38:34–41:47: The “10-pound replica of fat,” beauty pressures, and sense of self
46:01–47:23: Playing a principal in a film, aging, moving beyond the ingénue phase
51:51: Big Bellies of the World Unite—body image and Liv Tyler’s positive impact
62:37–64:54: On avoiding eating disorders, and the impact of sisters’ struggles
65:01–66:54: First infatuations (Julian Casablancas, Heath Ledger); cherished mementos
70:08–71:04: The “Darling” fish and the ultimate high school cringe
72:38–77:25: Career highs and lows: Mozart in the Jungle, Mistress America, streaming boom
87:53–93:29: Sinners: casting story, music performance, filming with Coogler/Jordan
94:32–97:34: Songwriting, family, longing for belonging, moving away from country music
98:13–98:37: Advice to younger self: “Go and create your life.”

Final Reflections and Advice

Lola sees her arc as moving from “unseen child” to someone fiercely committed to making and sharing art that helps others feel seen.
She advocates for honesty, self-acceptance, and pushing back against beauty and societal conformity—using humor and storytelling as her tools.
To her 12-year-old self, she’d say simply: “Go and create your life.” (98:22)

For More

Lola Kirke’s memoir: Wild West Village: Not a Memoir Unless I Win an Oscar, Die Tragically, or Score a Country Number One
Her latest album and music can be found on all major platforms.
Follow her on Instagram: @lolakirk

Podcrushed remains a fun, vulnerable, and sharply insightful roundtable on the universal wounds and wildness of growing up—this time, with Lola Kirke’s wit, wisdom, and lived experience front and center.

Podcrushed: Lola Kirke

Hosts: Penn Badgley, Nava Kavelin, Sophie Ansari
Guest: Lola Kirke
Release Date: December 3, 2025

Episode Overview

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. The Wolf Pack Family & Feeling Like an Outsider

(08:20–15:00)

Lola describes her family in her memoir as “exceptionally good looking wolves, some of whom you might not want to meet alone at night.”
Her childhood home was “chaotic, glamorous, territorial.”
Despite appearances, Lola always felt a bit like an outsider in the “pack”—“I feel like I’m really boring, have no personality, and totally approachable. But maybe other people don’t see me that way.” (09:40)
As a youngest child with a larger age gap from her siblings (especially Domino, 8 years older), she often felt invisible—a feeling that has shaped her both positively and negatively.

2. Birth Order, Belonging, and the Search for Identity

(15:00–21:30)

The hosts and Lola bond over all being youngest children—the “elite” position as per Sophie.
Lola reflects on watching her sisters (Domino and Jemima) from the sidelines, looking up to and sometimes being resented by them.
Her attempts to assimilate into American culture after moving from London to New York (at age 5), to avoid being bullied at school, only meant she got “bullied at home” for adopting an American accent.

3. Family Background and Expectations

(25:40–28:49, 58:54–62:37)

Lola’s father, Simon Kirke, was the drummer and founding member of iconic rock bands Free and Bad Company.
Her mother, Lorraine Kirke, owned a famous vintage store, Geminola, in NYC’s West Village.
Expectations to pursue, and excel in, the arts felt less like encouragement and more like a mandate: “It wasn’t just, ‘be creative’—it was, ‘be successful in your field.’” (27:33)
They reminisce about their social circle’s downtown, bohemian New York scene—one “that can never exist again” in today’s corporatized, sanitized era.

4. Beauty, Body Image, and the Value System of the Arts

(38:18–47:40)

Lola shares the infamous story of a “10-pound replica of fat” being displayed on their dining room table—symbolizing the family’s fraught relationship to weight and appearance (38:34).
- “I definitely went from a beauty conscious household into beauty conscious industries.”
The group discusses how Hollywood/arts culture presents itself as rebellious but ends up reinforcing the same old values, just “with a leather jacket.”
Lola reflects on internalizing aggression and self-improvement, quoting Pema Chödrön: “The desire for self improvement is a form of aggression towards ourselves” (40:18), and finding new peace with her body and self-image.
She brings up the feeling of relief seeing aging actresses “with lines on their faces”—contrasted with the alienation of “weird” cosmetic procedures (47:23).

5. Adolescent Heartbreak & Cringe

(65:01–72:15)

Lola talks about her childhood loves (musicians like Julian Casablancas and Heath Ledger).
- Cherished memento: a Strokes autograph signed by Domino, her sister, on her behalf (66:18).
Cringiest adolescence memory: Trying to emulate the film “Darling,” she buys a Siamese fighting fish as an accessory. At school, a cool kid seizes and eats her fish, retaliating with a Coke slushie poured over her after she dumps her fish’s water on his head.
- The “bully” later asks her to prom and—years later—posts a photo of her bare feet from the Golden Globes stage (“hometown girl makes good”) (71:04).

6. Craft, Career, and Staying Genuine

(34:32–36:37, 72:25–87:53)

After a career lull during Covid, Lola discovered a love for writing and storytelling—resulting in her memoir, Wild West Village (34:38).
Her experience in film vs. TV; on Mozart in the Jungle (“changed my life”) and working with Noah Baumbach and Greta Gerwig on Mistress America.
On being a professional actor: “Being an artist is humiliating, you know, when it’s not humbling… Learning how arbitrary that kind of value is when it’s placed on you when you’re doing well.” (36:37)
On the film Sinners: Working with Ryan Coogler and Michael B. Jordan, capturing musical performances, and the technical process.
She expresses gratitude for her sensibilities and friendships—reiterating the importance of found family and strong women in her chosen support system.

7. Songwriting, Country Music, and Fitting In

(92:34–97:34)

Though British-American, Lola’s love of country music comes from its humor, storytelling, and multivalent women: “It’s a lot of grit and glamour for women. They get to be tough and tender and mothers and glamorous.” (93:29)
Current songwriting explores growing up, societal pressures, moving past “just more songs about fucking” (95:59).
- “Sex is like water. It’s the best thing ever when you want it, but when you don’t, it’s just boring.” (96:37)
She’s now writing about family less, branching into other themes, and seeking her "own club" to belong to.

Memorable Quotes

“I always knew that my feeling of being unseen growing up led me to not one, not two, but three careers in which I'm like, see me please. See me please. I’m so unsat. Please.” – Lola (20:09)

“I am on this earth to do more than just be pretty.” – Lola (41:47)

“Sex is like water. It’s the best thing ever when you want it, but when you don’t, it’s just boring.” – Lola (96:37)

“We live in a society that has made youth into a commodity and values that above all else… Being young breaks my heart.” – Lola (48:53)

“As an actor, you can’t… it’s very hard to articulate… just how much you become identified with something that in some ways you were, like, not responsible for at all.” – Penn (78:12)

“As much as I worry about the way that I look, I never worry enough to really do that much about it... It's a bandage on a bullet wound.” – Lola (45:13)

Timestamps for Major Segments

08:20–10:39: Lola describes the “wolf pack” Kirk household, family dynamics, and childhood
13:49–15:21: Relationships with Domino and Jemima; bullying at home and school
20:09–21:30: The need to be seen, and its impact on creative longing
25:48–28:29: Parental background: rockstar father, boho mother, and artsy expectations
38:34–41:47: The “10-pound replica of fat,” beauty pressures, and sense of self
46:01–47:23: Playing a principal in a film, aging, moving beyond the ingénue phase
51:51: Big Bellies of the World Unite—body image and Liv Tyler’s positive impact
62:37–64:54: On avoiding eating disorders, and the impact of sisters’ struggles
65:01–66:54: First infatuations (Julian Casablancas, Heath Ledger); cherished mementos
70:08–71:04: The “Darling” fish and the ultimate high school cringe
72:38–77:25: Career highs and lows: Mozart in the Jungle, Mistress America, streaming boom
87:53–93:29: Sinners: casting story, music performance, filming with Coogler/Jordan
94:32–97:34: Songwriting, family, longing for belonging, moving away from country music
98:13–98:37: Advice to younger self: “Go and create your life.”

Final Reflections and Advice

Lola sees her arc as moving from “unseen child” to someone fiercely committed to making and sharing art that helps others feel seen.
She advocates for honesty, self-acceptance, and pushing back against beauty and societal conformity—using humor and storytelling as her tools.
To her 12-year-old self, she’d say simply: “Go and create your life.” (98:22)

For More

Lola Kirke’s memoir: Wild West Village: Not a Memoir Unless I Win an Oscar, Die Tragically, or Score a Country Number One
Her latest album and music can be found on all major platforms.
Follow her on Instagram: @lolakirk

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Summary

Podcrushed: Lola Kirke

Episode Overview

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. The Wolf Pack Family & Feeling Like an Outsider

2. Birth Order, Belonging, and the Search for Identity

3. Family Background and Expectations

4. Beauty, Body Image, and the Value System of the Arts

5. Adolescent Heartbreak & Cringe

6. Craft, Career, and Staying Genuine

7. Songwriting, Country Music, and Fitting In

Memorable Quotes

Timestamps for Major Segments

Final Reflections and Advice

For More

Summary

Podcrushed: Lola Kirke

Episode Overview

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. The Wolf Pack Family & Feeling Like an Outsider

2. Birth Order, Belonging, and the Search for Identity

3. Family Background and Expectations

4. Beauty, Body Image, and the Value System of the Arts

5. Adolescent Heartbreak & Cringe

6. Craft, Career, and Staying Genuine

7. Songwriting, Country Music, and Fitting In

Memorable Quotes

Timestamps for Major Segments

Final Reflections and Advice

For More