B (3:52)

You know, I do use Brighter Vision. I actually have two sites for them. I have one for myself for Amanda Patterson LMHC and then my group Collective Caring Therapist of Broward, we have one. And so I am a big fan of Brighter Vision. I recomm them and they're great. They've really helped me. One of the best things they've done is help me get on the first page of Google.

A (4:10)

So well, hey, if that's not a good like testimonial, then I don't know what else is awesome. So you guys can even check out Amanda's website to actually check out their work. But they're just awesome people, great to work with. But most importantly, we are here with Sarah Lightshew today and I had to ask her how to pronounce her name because it looks very difficult, but it's not. So, Sarah, welcome. And she's joining us all the way from. Well, she said it's warm today, 40 degrees, cold, Minnesota. So welcome, welcome.

C (4:37)

Hi, Kate and Amanda, thank you for having me today. I'm excited to be here with you.

A (4:42)

We are excited to have you. And so your topic today is Let it go. Oh my gosh, I'm going to start singing. I have an awful singing voice, so I'm not going to do that to you guys. So let it go. And feel less overwhelmed in private practice. So I love talking about this topic because when I got into private practice back in 2010 and actually even coming into the online digital world as a practice building coach and consultant, I think we just kind of naturally fall sleeve to the business. And so this is a really important place. And you know, if you're, if you're just listening to this and you're either thinking about starting or you're starting out now, all the stuff that Sarah's going to talk about and we're going to chat about today really take that to heart. And you know, we've done a podcast with Joe Sanock talking about lifestyle business. There's so many things, if I did things over again, it wouldn't be incorporating first, it wouldn't be figuring out my name or, you know, who am I going to choose for a web designer. Be really learning how to create a lifestyle business, creating a brand, an ideal client and learning really how to maintain balance throughout this whole process because you can get carried away with it. So Sarah, tell us a little bit. How did you kind of get started with kind of practice building and really passionate about this topic?

C (5:49)

Absolutely. So I opened my private practice in 2013 and I had been a therapist in an agency setting for quite a while before that. But I decided to kind of make that leap into part time private practice after the birth of my second child and then all of a sudd, I started to notice that I was really stressed out and really overwhelmed because I was juggling, right. Like being the mom of two really little kids and I was like pretty much a part time, mostly full time stay at home mom. Right. So I had a lot of stuff I was doing for the family, but also trying to figure out how do I get this private practice going, how do I attract clients, how do I do everything right? Website Things that I didn't know anything about coming from agency. So I noticed that I was really stressed out and I was kind of starting to figure, how do I do this without being so overwhelmed myself? And during that process, also, I do supervision for other therapists. And I noticed, gosh, these same things are the exact things that my supervisees are talking about as well. So I kind of started thinking about how could I support therapists who are beyond the supervision kind of level in being less overwhelmed. And that's where my work with a vibrant therapist and helping therapists kind of figure out how to be less overwhelmed and enjoy their work more came about.

A (7:16)

Interesting. Amanda and I actually. Amanda sent me a text that I actually posted on Facebook this week. Because, you know, being in the online world, you don't. It's interesting because you don't get feedback right away. I remember when Kate and I first did podcasts and even a webinar, because you're like, talking to dead space and you're like, that was so funny. I hope that was. I hope people are laughing on the other end and you don't know. And so when you get those little emails are like, Amanda sent me a text this week about that was a really great podcast or is inspirational. And Amanda and I both came from, you know, agency work, so we totally get that. And wouldn't you guys, like, agree, like, agency work really teaches you how to work really friggin hard.

C (7:53)

It does, right? And I mean, I built amazing clinical skills. And I think for me, like, I have good strategies for navigating, like, paperwork, but other administrative tasks, I just don't think I really had the skill set as strong as I really needed it. I'm going into private practice.

A (8:13)

Yeah, I know. Go ahead, Amanda.

B (8:14)

I was gonna say there's definitely a difference between being a strong leader in an agency and a strong leader in a private practice. There's definitely a transition that needs to happen. I love what you said about beyond the supervision, because a lot of people go into private practice once they're licensed. There's no supervision.

A (8:32)

Right? Yeah, for sure. So let's kind of jump into your topic. And so what's one of the key points that you share with therapists? Really? How to manage that overwhelm as they get into private practice.

C (8:44)

Right. So I have three key things that I think that therapists really have to stop doing so that they feel less overwhelmed. The first is that therapists need to stop saying yes to things that are not in alignment with their goals and vision and their values. I loved how you kind of started introducing this topic by saying that you would step back and almost take that bigger picture look at your practice. Because I do think that we get wrapped up in all the details of, okay, how am I going to set up the structure of my business? How am I going to get this website up? How am I going to do this and this and get those clients in instead of thinking about, why am I doing a private practice, how do I want this to fit with my life outside of private practice? Right. And I think if we have a really strong foundation of where we're going, why we got into private practice, what types of client we want to serve, how we want private practice to fit with our life, it helps us say yes and no to the right things that are a good fit for us or not. Right? A good fit for us. And we have that vision to guide us versus saying yes to every single thing that comes our way.

A (9:55)

So, Sarah, for you, when you're working with other therapists and they seem to be the yes people, right? Like, how do you help get them right back on track? Like, what is it that you do? What do you say? Give us some of those examples.

C (10:07)

Yeah, definitely. Well, one thing that I like to start doing with therapists is looking at how saying yes actually can negatively impact us. And saying yes can almost, like, give us a bad reputation, Right? Because if we're saying yes to too many things, we're going out there and not giving, showing up as our best selves, and then people see that. Right? Like, I would rather agree to go give three talks a year and be amazing at those talks where everyone is like, sarah, I want to work with you, then go do 10 talks and do it, like, halfway. And people are like, that was kind of a waste of my time. Right. When we're saying yes to things that we aren't really that passionate about, I think that people see that. Right? So I try to help my coaching clients see that potential negative impact of saying yes to the wrong things. Because I think people worry about, oh, I'm going to hurt someone's feelings because I said I didn't want to do that, or, oh, I'll just squeeze it in. It's not that big of a deal, but when you get down to it, it is a big deal.

A (11:11)

Absolutely. Amanda, I mean, you actually, when you and I met, you were just starting your group practice, and so, you know, really creating a group practice, there's so much that goes on, and what's one thing that you do to stay focused on the things that you really need to be doing.

B (11:26)

So I'm a big advocate of planners. I have. I keep, obviously with my electronic health record, I keep all of my clients there, but I also still use a physical planner to plan things. And I plan out my week. I even plan out my year. When I sat down at the end of 2017, I pulled out my planner and said, what am I going to do for 2018? And so that really helped me to decide what opportunities will I say yes to and what opportunities will I say no to based on where I saw my year being or even my week being. Like, can I say yes to being a guest in a podcast if I were to take a look at my planner? I'm a huge advocate for planners.

A (12:09)

You're like, I'm just a huge advocate.

C (12:10)

Let me just.

A (12:12)

Is there any specific planner that you really like?

B (12:15)

No. You know what? I'm also a huge advocate of Target. And so I go into Target and pick the prettiest planner I can find.

A (12:23)

I usually pick one that's in my, like a color scheme. So that's usually black or white or pink or purple or teal.

C (12:29)

Yes.

B (12:30)

My color schemes would be very similar to yours. Mine this year is blue and pink.

A (12:34)

Ah, very nice. Very nice. So, Sarah, do you do, like, an exercise to begin to walk, you know, clinicians through, like, what are their goals? Like, what do you do? What do you start off with?

C (12:46)

I just kind of start off with a what if kind of question, like, what is your ultimate goal? Right. I think a lot of times when we're first starting with private practice, we think kind of small. Like I did. I thought, like, okay, I have this many spots that I could fill with clients while I have childcare. And that was like, the limit of how far I could see my practice at that point. Right. Like, I want 13 clients, and then I'm going to be happy. And as I kind of started to work on filling those spots, I realized that wasn't actually what I. What was going to bring me happiness. Right. So that's kind of what I start with, is if you could dream as big as you could dream, what would you want? Right. And what are the values that you want to show up and have. Show up in your work? And so how do we create a practice that reflects those values? Those kind of big picture kind of questions?

A (13:38)

Yeah, that's great. And I love when we talk to other practice building coaches and consultants, because we're just all consistent on the same page. You know, Kate and I actually have A goal worksheet that, you know, we talk about in one of our podcasts in regards to that we launch, you know, the beginning of the year and you know, we invite people to go actually sit in their happy place, whatever that is, if that's at the beach, if it's at Starbucks, if it's in your bed, and just really be in the wonderment of that question and just let your mind kind of get crazy and excited and all of that stuff. Like, you know, when you really speak to people about what difference do they want to make, they usually have a big goal. It's not the. I just want to have a small office with one couch and see three clients. It's not usually that. I mean, if that's it for you, great, but that's not what it is. You know, I hear people like have a nonprofit for women or young girls and you know, it's going to be across just. It's exciting to hear that stuff. And I love how you also talk about the value. You know, what are our own core values and what are the values of the clients that we want to attract? Because when Kate and I created the private practice startup and we actually created our core values which are passion, quality and collaboration. When we go to make a decision on are we going to release this or are we going to do this or are we going to work with this person, is we just go back to our values, right? And say, well, is this quality? I'm not really sure this doesn't support what we're up to, or is this collaboration? And it just feels good because it gives you a guideline, you know what I mean? And to me, I almost feel like it's easier to say yes or no and it's like, oh, it just doesn't fit with my values. It's not like, well, I don't have time, but I really don't want to disappoint you.

B (15:12)

But you know what I mean?

A (15:13)

It's just like that just doesn't fit in our company.

C (15:17)

Absolutely. And I think the interesting thing that comes up here too is because there is so much online presence with other therapists now, we can see what other people are doing in their private practices. And I think it's almost like a double edged sword in one regard. I think it helps therapists dream bigger when they see other therapists doing really big things. But also on the other hand, I see it as kind of like containing dreams too. Right? Because it's like, oh, I really respect Amanda and this is what she's doing with her group practice. So I think I have to do it just that way. And, you know, I really try to help therapists take a step back and focus on themselves and what is it that they really want. And maybe what they want isn't what Amanda's doing, or maybe they do want a group practice, but their way of getting there is different. Right? Right.

A (16:06)

Absolutely. For sure. Share with us your second tip.

C (16:11)

Absolutely. So the second tip is trying to focus on too many things at once. I see a lot of therapists just trying to do it all all by themselves. And I've been playing around with a new phrase that's called, I say do it all by not doing it all when we're first starting private practice. I mean, I was in this place, right? You don't have that much money. You think, I'll just learn how to do every little detail all by myself, and I'm gonna make until the money starts flowing. But I actually think that just makes therapists feel stuck, and they get more and more overwhelmed and frustrated, and they kind of doubt themselves about, why can't I figure this out? So I really encourage therapists to, number one, draw on others in the field who already have mastered some of the areas they're trying to work from, work on. Because if someone already knows how to do an awesome website or how to record a webinar, like, go to that person and just let them share their knowledge versus spending hours and hours researching it on your own. The other thing that I think about here, too, is outsourcing, which I know you were talking about brighter vision at the beginning of this podcast. I think therapists are a little bit too slow to outsource sometimes because, number one, it's hard to trust other people. And then, number two, we do actually have to pay them for the work that they're doing. You have to take that leap of faith that it's worthwhile to hand off some of those tasks.

A (17:36)

Yeah. What are some. Go ahead, Amanda.

B (17:38)

I was going to say, as you were talking, I was thinking there has never been a task that I outsource that then I took back because it wasn't working out like anything I've outsourced, whether it's my phone calls, social media, website, those are all still outsourced. And so I think you're right. Having that leap of faith that it's all going to work out. And maybe it wasn't the right person initially, but I never took back any of those things once they were already outsourced. I think most Therapists will find they'll be very happy to do that.

A (18:07)

And I love that you say that. And I'll just add, if you are afraid, then just remind yourself that you could take it back if you wanted to and maybe that would just give you that like, safety net. Right. And like trick your mind, like, well, let me outsource this, but I could take it back and then you'll be exactly where Amanda is and you won't ever take it back.

C (18:21)

Mm, definitely.

A (18:24)

What are some of the things that you guys outsource?

C (18:27)

I personally just outsource some tweaks to my website. I actually have two websites and both of them were done by myself and. Or like family friends that just kind of knew how to do it. But this right around Christmas time, I had someone do like an overhaul on my vibrant therapist website. And literally the changes that she made in that week would have taken me years to figure out. And I actually don't think I would have ever figured out how to do some of them. So that was totally worth the money that I paid her to get my website where I wanted it to be.

A (19:01)

Yeah. Amanda, what do you like to outsource?

B (19:03)

So my number one thing to outsource is my phones. It's almost impossible to have a pretty full practice and answer your phones. Even when I had a, let's call it a closer to a part time practice, or at that threshold from part time to full time, I had somebody answering my phone. Because you're in sessions for a large amount of time during the day, especially if you have back to back sessions. And I know that people want phone calls to either be returned, you know, fairly shortly after they are given or if we get emails and we want to have a very quick turnaround time. So definitely the phones and where do.

A (19:38)

You outsource them to or what technology do you use?

B (19:40)

So I have it. I got very lucky that I have somebody local that she just does this part time and she answers my phones for me. She does my billing as well. So I outsource billing. But she. It's just like a local person who answers phone.

A (19:57)

And so I'm probably, I'm sure like Startup Nation is wondering is like, well, how do you find those people? What suggestions would you guys both give on being able to find people to outsource? Like, how do you decide? How do you research? Like, what are some tips?

C (20:11)

I recommend kind of going to other local therapists in your area and asking them for recommendations. In my opinion, knowing someone who's actually worked with the person you want to outsource and speaks highly of them. Means a lot to me, especially if the person making the referral is someone that I recommend. But I've also gone to other small business owners for resources too, right. Like my website person, I didn't meet through another therapist. I just met through another small business owner in our area. So I'm all about relationships and asking for referrals.

A (20:45)

Amanda, what about you?

B (20:46)

And, you know, another great place is the Facebook group. That's. My office manager was going to be leaving. She decided not to. I know. I was like, I will pay you anything for you to stay. And she just ended up staying. I think that was luck of the draw. But I started to look for somebody for a virtual assistant. And so where I went is the Facebook group. I posted in a couple of Facebook groups. I have a Facebook group I'm in. Kate and Katie's Facebook group. I'm in. I'm in probably like 20 Facebook groups for therapists. But I like them all because there's a different flavor to each of them and there's different resources in each of them. And I have found that to be a great way to find resources.

A (21:28)

And I'm very similar to you, Amanda. I call it polling the audience, right? So that I'm like, I gotta go to Facebook. I gotta pull the audience. You know, whether it's like a dog watcher, it doesn't matter. You get great responses that you didn't even ever know. Some of the things that we use to outsource are like, upwork, fiber, you know, we have Jessica's our marketing person. I have my own personal assistant for the business, but I use her for other personal stuff, like planning my vacation or researching things, because research takes a long time. I don't want to sit down at the computer and do that. And, you know, one of the things that I learned in business coaching when I kind of get caught up in the minutiae of stuff is I just ask myself, is, is this activity, like, creating me money, or by me doing this activity, am I actually losing money? So that really just kind of helps me realign of what I need to be doing. And also at the same time is we have to look at where our natural talents, right? Is this the thing that can do or can I outsource that? And so, you know, I used to be a person that many years ago, like, I would, like, I would make fun of people who had, like, cleaning people. I'd be like, can't even clean your own house. Like, really. And Then we have cleaning people for the last two years. And I just realized, like, why did, like, the mindset shift sometimes needs to happen to be able to let go. Right. And be able to feel comfortable and. But when you do, there's such a sense of freedom and liberation and all of that that.

C (22:45)

Absolutely.

A (22:47)

Yeah. So share with us your third thing that you wanted to share, Sarah.

C (22:50)

Well, this is a perfect transition.

A (22:52)

Awesome. I love perfect transition.

C (22:54)

The third tip is failing to ask for help, trying to do it all on our own. And I really love that you brought up the house cleaning. Right. Because I think that when we're noticing that we're getting overwhelmed as we're trying to build our private practice, we need to look at where can we ask for help in our business, but also where can we ask for help at home, too? Because I think trying to do it all across the board is what burns us out and makes us, like, exhausted. So things like childcare, house cleaning, someone that can help with. I loved what you said too, about vacation planning. Like, I never even thought about that. That would be amazing. It's kind of like the home front, but then on the business side, it is things like, like the outsourcing of certain tasks that we've already talked about. But I also think making sure that we're getting enough clinical consultation and support from our colleagues as we venture out into private practice is another realm of asking for help.

A (23:52)

Yeah, I love that you say that. There was a big pinnacle moment in my life. My very good friend Diana, I don't remember. It was many years ago. I was going through something and she said, well, why don't you see a therapist? I'm like, I'm not going to see a therapist. I'm a therapist. Right? All that therapist shame going on. And then she just simply said to me, she's like, so you don't believe in what we do? I was like, oh, you just stab me in the heart. Right? And actually, I think that was really a big turning point in my life is because I didn't ask for help a lot, but now I'm actually the one to, like, constantly ask for help. Like, you can help me with this. I don't want to do it. I don't know. Someone knows better outsource this stuff. No, thank you. You know what I mean? And it feels great to feel supported and not have that stuff in the way, whether it's you feel it's conditional or you feel you're bothering somebod. You know, one of the things that I really Got working in community mental health. We used to do wraparound services. And part of wraparound services were to engage the natural supports. And it was very interesting because the case managers were kind of leading this, and they would say something like, well, I don't know if I should ask the family, because they might feel uncomfortable if they ask uncle so and so or mom to be involved. And it's like, wow, the mentality of us asking for support is very interesting. And we look at other countries, like South America. I had a client from South America, and one of the difficulties moving here and marrying her husband was the fact that Americans do everything on their own, right? And the exhaustion and the overwhelm. And she said, well, I had maids, I had cooks, and I had someone to tutor my children and watch my children. And I was like, wow, what a mindset shift, right? And really, like, embracing that as cool and, like, a possibility and not making it mean anything negative. You know what I mean? And so I love Sarah, that you say is really being able to not only look at the professional things, but where personally can we outsource things? You know, and in Florida here, we have lots of pools. So, I mean, pool services outsource, lawn services outsource. And I was talking to Jo Muirhead, and she outsources her ironing, so she doesn't like to do it. Right. And it's just great. I love that. Absolutely. So, you know, in regards to, like, therapists trying to bridge that gap of asking for help, both of you, really, how do you help encourage them to do that?

C (25:59)

Well, I kind of like what you just said there, Kate, about how your friend had to call you out on that. And that's kind of like what I do in my practice with coaching is, like, gently call out my coaching clients as well. On, well, why? Right? Why aren't you asking for help and also helping them see that people actually really appreciate it when they can be of service to us. Right. Like to ask someone, could you please pick up my kids so that I could be on this podcast today? Right. They're more than happy to do that. They want to support us. And sometimes when we're kind of trying to keep it all in and we're stressed out, we're actually, like, negatively impacting those relationships. So I really try to encourage people to say yes as much as possible when someone's offering help.

A (26:47)

That's great. That's really good. And so I'm. Go ahead, Amanda.

B (26:50)

I was gonna say I love that. I was thinking we have somebody who helps clean our house, and she's like a part of our family. For instance, there are things when she comes, I'm happy to see her. I update her on anything that's going on. Even my cats are happy to see her. They're a little scared sometimes of the cleaning supplies, but in she's a part of our lives. And the same thing with my office manager. She's as invested in making my business go well just as I am. And so I think what you just said was so great, is that people are excited to be a part of that. They are excited to be in cohesion and in collaboration with whatever you're doing and achieving those goals. And it's an extra person you get to celebrate things with.

A (27:30)

I like that. That's fun how you said that, Amanda. An extra person to celebrate things with. So, Sarah, I just wanted to say thank you for being on the podcast and if you could kind of maybe sum up in a phrase or two, what is it that you really want clinicians to take away from this message today?

C (27:48)

I think the main thing that I want clinicians to take away today is if you're feeling overwhelmed, you're not alone, but you do not have to feel as overwhelmed as you might be feeling right now. And if you slow down, take some time for a reflection, you can create a plan that's going to reduce your overwhelm so that you can be more energized by your private practice and feel less depleted at the end of the week.

A (28:12)

That's great. And, you know, one of the hardest things, when I went through my year of business coaching, and I'm sure Amanda can test to this because she loves planning. Right. Is that when we take time away from working in our business and actually work on our business, which is really setting the goal and the plan in quarter 1, 2, 3, next year, whatever, you will actually work more efficiently and faster. And then you can really sit down and look, because when we're stuck in the minutia of the doing, we're just doing the doing and we're the hamster on the hamster wheel. So I think, think again. There's so much mindset shift that has. Shift? Did I say shit? Oh, gosh. It's a shift that has to happen in the space of being a business and being successful and feeling less overwhelmed. Right. And being able to, like you said in your title, is just like letting it go and feeling okay enough to do that and even if you don't do it anyway. So awesome. And I know that you have a Giveaway. And it's the I'm gonna let you say what the giveaway is because I don't want to botch it up.

C (29:08)

Sure. The giveaway is the overwhelm assessment for stre out therapists. And it's an inventory that therapists can download and it has a whole list of areas where they might be feeling overwhelmed. And it helps therapists kind of check off where they're feeling overwhelmed and then create an action plan like to prioritize what they want to tackle first, why they want to tackle that first and get some momentum. What I have found in talking to therapists is a lot of times they feel like there's just so much over overwhelming them that they don't even know where to start. So this is a tool to really help them get that big picture and make a plan to get moving on reducing their overwhelm right away.

A (29:49)

Awesome. And you guys can actually find that right on the show notes page. So all the things that we had talked about today will be there. And so you can find the private practices startup.com under the podcast tab and go to the podcast episode. So, Sarah, I just wanted to thank you for being here today and sharing your passion with Startup Nation And Amanda. Amanda, you're always a great person to have around and friend and connect with and collaborate. And I love that you were here as our special guest co host today. And so also too, if you guys make sure you check out Amanda, I know she talked about her websites in the beginning. So Caring Therapist Broward. And your personal website is what Amanda.

B (30:24)

AmandaPattersonlmhc.com Yep.

A (30:27)

And Amanda, like I said before, really loves about the business planning and the marketing and she also has a Facebook group, so hop in there as well. And so Startup Nation, we hope you join us next week week as we talk to Frances Harvey from my solution services. And kind of along the same lines of what we've been talking about today is her company is an online business management for clinicians really helping you outsource. So, you know, maybe 2018 is all about outsourcing and really having that either financial freedom time freedom that you really desire. Maybe that's just kind of like what I'm energetically attracting. So maybe we keep talking about that stuff. So Startup Nation, thank you for hanging out with us today. If you haven't jumped in our Facebook group yet, hang out with us there and the community of rank right now we're over like 3,000 clinicians and growing around the world there. You'll be able to connect with others. Chat. We're in there chatting with you and we look forward to joining you and you joining us next time. And thank you so much for letting us inspire you from startup to mastery. Have an amazing day. Thanks for joining us on the Private practice startup. Visit theprivatepracticestartup.com for awesome resources, free trainings, additional attorney approved private practice paperwork, and so much more.