Detailed Summary: Private Practice Startup Podcast

Episode: Up Close and Personal with Tiffany McLain

Hosts: Dr. Kate Campbell & Katie Lemieux
Guest: Tiffany McLain
Release Date: November 13, 2019

Episode Overview

This episode features an “Up Close and Personal” conversation with therapist and money mindset coach Tiffany McLain. The focus is on Tiffany’s personal journey—her upbringing, how it shaped her clinical and business philosophy, her work with taboo topics like race and money, her experience of motherhood, and the challenges of boundaries and saying no. The discussion balances depth and humor, offering listeners insight into both Tiffany’s story and broader issues in private practice.

Key Themes and Discussion Points

1. Tiffany’s Family and Upbringing (03:37–06:48)

• Raised in Bremerton, Washington, a small military town outside Seattle.
• Biracial background (Black father, white mother) in a predominantly white community; this dynamic shaped her early experiences and sense of identity.
• Family discussions of race were minimal; parents had different outlooks:
  • “Dad would say, ‘You guys are black. Never forget it. The world’s going to see you as black, so you’re black.’ My mom would say, ‘What about me, Rufus? Where would I fit in?’” — Tiffany (04:52)
• Early exposure to “elephants in the room,” such as race and class, fed her later passion for addressing taboo topics.

2. Pathway to Becoming a Therapist (06:48–11:49)

• Visualization of her path: Early desire to help at-risk youth, becoming a camp counselor for foster kids at 17.
• Moved to LA initially to pursue acting, influenced by stereotypes about Black success:
  • “In my small town, that’s where black folks saw themselves: sports or entertainers.” — Tiffany (06:58)
• Continued working with youth; therapy entered her life during a dissociative period in LA.
• Influence of a pivotal therapist:
  • “There are people in the world whose goal is to talk about the unspoken things—the unconscious things.” — Tiffany (09:06)
• Realization: Many life decisions before age 32 were unconscious; therapy and psychoanalytic training helped her gain greater intentionality.

3. Money, Taboo Topics, and Consciousness (10:45–11:49)

• Specializes in helping therapists confront their money issues.
• Money as a symbol for what we’re unconscious about:
  • “So many of us go unconscious around money, but it’s a symbol of ways we’re unconscious in all areas of our lives.” — Tiffany (10:49)
• Ongoing commitment to self-discovery through psychoanalysis:
  • “Every week my mind is constantly being blown… it’s amazing.” — Tiffany (11:40)

4. Personal Fears, Insecurities, and Living Intentionally (14:01–16:42)

• Main fears:
  • Fear of not realizing unconscious patterns before it’s too late.
  • “I’m afraid of the things I don’t know yet that are having a profound impact on my behavior. So I know there are things that I’m still—I’m not allowed to know for some reason—and those are keeping me paralyzed.” — Tiffany (14:13)
• Hosts discuss with Tiffany the idea of trusting the process and reframing fear as excitement.
• Tiffany emphasizes desire to live intentionally and avoid being “asleep” to her own life.

5. Motherhood & Impact on Professional Identity (16:43–19:52)

• Became a mother at age 39; discusses ambivalence about parenthood due to life circumstances.
• Parenting as an “exciting puzzle” of balancing business growth and child-rearing.
• Motherhood catalyzed deeper clinical work and forced greater clarity in prioritizing:
  • “It’s really pushing me to say no. I have to say no. I have no choice but to say no.” — Tiffany (19:40)

6. On Boundaries and Saying “No” (19:52–25:25)

• Struggles with people-pleasing and the cultural/familial expectations to serve and say yes.
• Lessons about resentment and the necessity of intentional boundaries, discussed by both Tiffany and hosts.
• “Women aren’t even allowed to know what they want. Your job is simply to serve and say yes.” — Tiffany (24:13)
• Therapy has helped Tiffany learn to pause and reflect before agreeing to requests.

7. Embarrassing & Humanizing Therapist Moments (25:25–27:37)

• Tiffany shares about accidentally calling clients by the wrong name—an experience most therapists can relate to.
• The hosts recall their own funny and cringe-worthy therapy mishaps, creating a relatable, warm conversation.

8. Failures and Lessons in Business (27:37–29:45)

• Biggest failures: Poor hiring decisions and saying yes to projects misaligned with her true calling (“Lean and Make Bank” program).
• Importance of sticking to your “one thing”:
  • “Every time I do something outside of my one choice, I fail at that… Even if it goes well, it doesn’t work out ultimately.” — Tiffany (28:34)
• Discussion of boundary-setting in business, giving practical scripts and anecdotes from their own journeys.

9. Money, Integrity, and Partner Dynamics (29:45–36:04)

• Common concern among therapists: lack of alignment with partner on finances.
• Tiffany challenges the idea of waiting for partner buy-in before making business changes:
  • “Waiting around for a partner to change so that you can change… that keeps you small.” — Tiffany (30:46)
• Pet peeve: Excuses for why “it works for others, but not for me”—the “special snowflake” fallacy.
• Hosts’ coaching tips for helping clients deal with the partner-objection.

10. Financial Integrity and Taking Responsibility (35:24–36:07)

• Tiffany’s program challenges students to confront where they are “out of financial integrity”—for example, undercharging while accruing debt.
• Story of facilitating group transparency and accountability.

11. Lightning Round: Personality & Fun (40:25–44:12)

• Unique hobby: Violin (though currently on hiatus).
• Pets: One cat (Lotus); 17-year-old cat Toby recently passed away.
• Style: Would never wear khakis or cargo pants; favorite clothing is her dad’s old “I’d rather be fishing” t-shirt.
• Spirit animal: Stallion (“also a male, which is interesting”).
• Junk food: Honey mustard kettle chips, popcorn.
• Comfort item: Childhood teddy bear (“Fuzzy,” one-eyed, from a racist grandma—now the subject of therapy discussion).
• Best theme party: Underwear party in college (with an amusing anecdote about missing the “sexy” memo).
• Dream dinner guest: Obama

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On talking about the unspoken:
  "All of those things, from the get-go, I have been wanting to speak about the things that are weighing heavily in the room, but people are not talking about." — Tiffany (05:04)
• On boundaries and resentment:
  "If I'm resentful, then that's going to energetically come out on you and it's not going to honor me. My mom has this great saying that when we do what's right for ourselves, we automatically do what's right for others." — Katie Lemieux (21:46)
• On partnership and money decisions:
  "I really disabuse people of that notion that your partner has to be on board in order for you to make changes in your business and your life." — Tiffany (30:26)
• On excuses and financial integrity:
  "When people say 'That person was able to accomplish it, but I can't because I'm a special snowflake,' that just tears me apart." — Tiffany (37:30)
• On being energized by passion:
  "When I'm with people who I like, I have energy… I love this—talking about being in your lane, doing the thing that excites you." — Tiffany (39:01)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• Tiffany’s childhood & family: 03:37–06:48
• Therapy career path: 06:58–11:49
• Money & consciousness work: 10:45–11:49
• Fear, intentions, and the unknown: 14:01–16:42
• Motherhood & professional impact: 16:43–19:52
• Boundaries & resentment: 19:52–25:25
• Embarrassing therapist moments: 25:25–27:37
• Business failures & lessons: 27:37–29:45
• Money, partners, and integrity: 29:45–36:07
• Lightning round fun: 40:25–44:12

Episode Tone and Language

Conversational, vulnerable, and vibrant; Tiffany combines humor and depth, encouraging honest talk about issues that are usually hidden (money, boundaries, family). The hosts keep the energy high, share their own experiences, and create a supportive atmosphere.

Final Takeaways

• Tiffany’s openness about her journey, from racial identity and unconscious motivations to money mindset and motherhood, offers listeners both inspiration and practical wisdom.
• Emphasis on boundaries, financial integrity, and conscious living is woven through personal and professional stories.
• The importance of confronting personal blind spots—regardless of fear—echoes throughout the conversation.
• The playful lightning round uncovers Tiffany’s quirky side, making for a well-rounded and engaging episode.