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A
The main reason for the engagement, I discovered it was that they don't know what will happen. And in life we resent it. In rpg, people like this surprise effect.
B
We like it in real life as well. That's Core Drive 7 unpredictability and curiosity. We say we don't like it. Ian Gagers and Welcome to Professor Game, the number one gamification podcast where we explore how games, gamification and game thinking help us boost engagement, multiply retention and build stronger products. I'm Rob, I'm the founder and coach of Professor Game and I'm also the head of Engagement strategy in Europe in the Octalysis Group leading gamification consultancy and professor of gamification game based solutions at top global institutions including IE Business School, efmd, EBS University and so many others around the world. And before we dive into today's conversation, remember if you're struggling with retention with churn engagement with your product, service or business and want to turn that around, look at our Core drives in the Wild Free guide. You can just click on the link in the description and you will get it right on your inbox. And without further ado, Victoria, welcome to the podcast. Happy to have you back once again. Are you prepared to engage?
A
Yes, definitely. Thank you for having me Rob, and I'm glad to be here and to explore what we will discover.
B
Absolutely, absolutely lovely to have you back. As you might know from the previous episode and if you don't know about it, just look at the description and you can click there and listen to that episode. Victoria has written multiple books on playful gainful living and other experiences that she has had and she's been discussing and right now we're going to be discussing one of her latest books. But I also, and of course if you want to see her bio and everything, all that is right there. But I wanted to start with asking precisely about. I have the number. Yeah, 14 books. Living gainfully. You've explored so many different angles so extensively. What keeps you sort of coming back in and you know, what is it in that this intersection of life and games that still surprises you?
A
Actually when I published the first book ten years ago, actually it was exactly ten years ago, the five minute perseverance game. I didn't know about gamification and I thought that would be works for me and it's wonderful. But then I discovered gamification and I also again wrote a couple of books and I thought that's it. But it wasn't. I kept discovering and again more and more and it's not only parallels or theory. There have been many books and many articles saying about game theory, about parallels, about drawing the parallels about life and games, but discovering, actually diving into different genre or into different aspects of games. There is so much depth and multidimensionality and also there is so much closeness to game, but there is also difference to how we behave inside games and outside of games. So that became very interesting and exciting for me to explore in a game in itself.
B
Interesting, interesting. Love the whole perspective and something we were starting to discuss especially at the start given the new book, you know, be your best game master, which caters for tabletop RPGs. I've mentioned more times than I'm proud to say because I always say, you know, I'm getting closer and now I'm going to play my next ctrpg. Right now is not a good season. A young daughter is definitely not the best moment for that because that means probably, you know, doing kind of things at night or whatever. Like it's not and very busy as well professionally. But anyways, I also am, I don't want to say guilty because it sounds negative, but I'm also part of the team that still hasn't experienced TTRPGs myself and from what we've discussed, it seems like you're part of that team as well. So how did you go about not being a person who's experienced TTRPGs or tabletop role playing games yourself to writing a book about how to use that for something else, Being your own game master in this occasion?
A
Yes, yes. It was also surprising to me, although I wrote a book a couple years ago called actual real life role playing games saying that everything in life is a role playing game and I have role playing gamers in my life. So my family also in my husband's family and actually no one inside our family, or actually not no one, but no one of the adults plays role playing games. But my son engaged in D and D in Dungeons and Dragons and he enjoyed it very much and he loves how it took place and everything. And it's in the youth club that they are playing, so they have an adult game master there. But he also played it with two other friends of his and he actually they made a variation of D and D and played with different things and one of them was game master, the others were gamers and they were developing worlds for each other. So there was a lot happening and very interesting, engaging to listen to and to discover together with him. Although I wasn't playing myself. So this is how Something ignited and something kind of was in the back of my head when I started exploring was thinking about different ways or different roles we play when we relate to ourselves, with ourselves. So we are teachers, we are leaders, we are therapists, we are also, if we take the other side, we are bratty child children, we are someone who resists, we are patients, we are trainees. So we have all these roles with each other. So I started thinking about role playing games and especially this strange role, you could say game master, which is kind of not quite a player, but also participates in the gameplay. So I was curious about it. So this is how it started and at the end, at the beginning, the book was supposed to be called something like self leadership, self parenting self and so on, but it turned out to be something completely different. Yes.
B
Interesting, interesting. One of the things that I've noticed is you talk about how this sort of relates to yourself and be your best game master is that relationship you have with yourself and how perhaps even that you've been exploring. You've talked about how the game master role in itself, it has been so crucial. So the question is, and given, you know, I haven't read your book, full disclosure, when you talk about be your best game master, I'm guessing that it has to be how to become that game master for yourself. Yes. How does that, you know, how does that happen? How does that relate to ourselves? Can you, can you, I don't know, unpack that a little bit more? What does it mean to be, to be the game master in your. In your life?
A
Yes. I was so curious about this role in general. So I started researching and I found a couple of books and then I selected one to start with and it was by Justin Alexander. So you want to be a game master. And it had very good feedback and it has also suggestions for the game masters with maps and so on, for D and D and for other games. So I started reading it and I was immediately blown away because it was. The first sentence was saying an RPG is a conversation. And this is what, what I realized, what's happening inside my head. It's. I have constantly a conversation and later when I researched and actually thought I should, I couldn't be the first one saying that. And then I found a book, I haven't read it yet, but I read reviews about it called Self Illusion is when we think that we are just one person and we have a monologue. We don't have a monologue. It's a constant conversation as we relate to the world around us. So I was thinking, what's happening? So I started researching also different books. And I read a book by Jill Balte Taylor, who is neuroscientist, and her book is called the Whole. Her second New York Times bestselling book is called the Whole Brain Living. So she talks about four characters in our heads, like with the left and right brain halves, and then we have the forward and the backward parts of it. So we have four characters inside us. And she described them, she even named them for herself and she described all the behaviors they have. So that was kind of an igniting point to see that there are so many people actually who talk about it. Why not learning from RPG and from game masters? So I was very curious about this role because game masters are those who start the storytelling in a round of an RPG, but also they are referee. And most of the RPGs, especially tabletop RPGs, are a collaborative storytelling game. So they are not. There are not so many competitive games, but even in competitive, the players have to agree to certain rules. So that was really like, oh, okay. It's collaborative game. This is why people actually enjoy it. All players who play rpg, they really enjoy it. Maybe for some people it's. But who engage again and again. It's really interesting. And the main reason for the engagement, I discovered it was that they don't know what will happen. It's so called active play. And in life, we resent it. So I was really interested. Oh, okay. In games in rpg, people like this surprise effect. Surprise.
B
Eventually we like it in real life as well. That's Core Drive 7. Unpredictability and curiosity. We say we don't like it. We say we don't like it.
A
Exactly. We say we don't like it. Yes. Yeah, I used to play. I don't know if you know this game. It's story cubes. We have all sets at home. They are just cubes with different pictures on them. And so you have different sets, like adventure and so on. So different cute pictures. Maybe a magic wand or an explosion or a skull or whatever. So there are many, many different pictures. And you roll this dice and then you tell your story. But my children and I, we used to play. And LHD was my son's idea who plays D and D, but before he played D and D is to roller dice, but not talk. Tell your whole story, but just say one sentence. So you say one sentence and the other person say another sentence in the story and so on. So you never knew how the story unfolds. And that Was so wonderful and so, so fun and crazy how the stories and this is what happens with life. It's always surprising, always like you said, the seventh quadrive, always this unexpected ideas, although we resist or we think we don't want them, but we need somehow to react. And there are all these conversations. So I was really, really glad to discover that there is a part of me and it is there. I just needed to recognize it that helps to bring all those other players together. And this is the game master.
B
Very, very, very cool indeed. One of the things, again, I'm not an expert in TTRPGs at all because I haven't played them, but I've heard about them, I've talked to people who know a lot about them and I've read a little bit about them. There's also usually something along the lines of a map or somewhere where physically players are moving around. Do you apply this to the inner rpg? Is there a map of the mind? Is it useful in daily life? I don't know. Like, is that something that you explore as well? How does it work?
A
Yes, yes, I did explore it and I actually with the book I was really glad that I had a game master, a very experienced game master of four different game RPGs reading my book. He read it as a beta reader and he provided actually excerpts from different. I couldn't buy all the handbooks and rule books, you know, of all the games, but he actually sent me excerpts of them and I quoted them in the book. That was so, so enlightening. Also to. It sounded like self help books, you know, those rule books. And we talked and I also kind of had my ideas about the maps and. And he also gave me feedback and it was interesting. It's not so in, in RPGs usually. Yeah, they have tools online and also they can draw as in book by Justin Alexander. He even suggested a couple of maps that you can use in life, it's a little bit different. Although we do. We prepare some maps like our to do list for our daily. So we do create or prepare some kind of maps. We have an idea what we want to do the next day. We know about our appointment. So we have this basic map. But our maps inside our minds are also. I imagine them like those in the strategic games where, you know, you start with a small. My husband plays some of those. When you kind of start discovering your land and then everything is dark, just one small piece and you explore it. You build your castle and so on. Then you go take your troops somewhere to discover More and then your map becomes a bit lighter and lighter. You see more when you kind of spend time in exploring something, you see more, you understand more. And then again when you draw your attention to something else, then you see in this area more and becomes lighter, lighter and that your land expands. This is how I think of our mind games, of our experience experiences that we kind of. We have unknown territory and when we pay attention and give it time to explore, then we make an experience. But we also need those cooldown phases when, you know, you don't. If you, for example, took over a castle, then you are not allowed to, you know, to send your troops to fight anymore. You have to, to plant crops and actually to take care of your land. And I, I noticed I have it just recently. I, I told it to my husband. I had like one day was so active, exciting, and I managed so many things and I called them quests and everything. And next day was like completely down and. And suddenly I had this thought, oh, it's my cooldown phase. I, I just need to stop fighting and just relax and to, you know, plant the crops and take care of what I already have. And that was, that was kind. It's really interesting how you know all these words, all this, all this vocabulary that, that games use RPGs or either TTRPGs, but also the other role playing games or strategic games they are. It's so helpful to use them. It's so amazingly rewarding and it actually helps in reframing. So that was a big discovery for me.
B
Makes sense. And with like any game, right, there's always rules to the game. And also even, I'm guessing, again, I'm assuming from TTRPGs, it's a human interaction. So conflicts can arise and there has to be something to rule them beyond the usual social interactions because you're inserting yourself into a new world. Is there some language that you use for this when using this game master sort of thought in your inner talk, as you were describing before, Is there any specific voice players like you mentioned before, the four players in the brain? I don't know. I'd like to explore that a little bit more, especially when it comes to conflict, like, oh, I want to do this, but I also want to do that. I can't do both things at the same time. How does the game master maybe help you there?
A
Yes, that's a great question. Actually, there are rules. And when I read those excerpts on those parts of handbooks and I saw that it's actually, as they say, you play all Together, respect your co players, be patient, be curious, open minded. Open minded is actually on all, on all games, on all handbooks I have found. And that's what we are sometimes not in our brains. We are not open minded to some ideas that we have either to other people, but also others. We have an impulse and I think no, no, no, I shouldn't do that. So those kind of rules directly like from handbooks. But also I realized I was that the, the language must be very kind that we use. But I want to come a little bit first. What you also mentioned about many, many roles, like four players. Actually I discovered for myself there are like 12 players.
B
Wow.
A
Yeah, like self leader, self coach and so on. So a game designer is one of them. Game master is also a role. But I realized that sometimes I cannot name them so it's more about discovering them. So the game master or also the other players inside me need to discover each other who is talking. And here I come back to the language. I realized that I need a couple of questions to put myself and to ask myself. And actually Jill Bolter Taylor in her book, she calls this kind of phase where all players are together. She calls it brain huddle. You know the huddle in like team games when they all come together, you know, in a circle and talk together. It's called huddle. So she says bring all your players into a huddle so they can find an appropriate response to the world outside you. And she says 90 seconds is enough for this brain huddle. You know, when you are confused, when you are conflicted inside yourself, give yourself 90 seconds, you find a solution. And I realized that sometimes maybe it can be even shorter if you ask yourself a couple of questions. And the first one, which I really resisted writing, I actually didn't put it as number one, I put it somewhere else. But it's actually the first one question. And then later I rephrased it. It was really interesting how I resisted to put this question. And this is what is happening inside myself? This is the very first question. When we are conflicted, when we are not conflicted, we just play our games and we are in the flow, so no problem. But when we have this problem, when we're challenged, when we are stressed, what is happening inside myself is the first question to put. And then the second one is who is talking? And this is, this is really interesting because for example, I noticed sometimes I rehearse, you know, like it, it happened to many people. You, you sit in a group of people and everyone introduce themselves and almost everyone would be rehearsing inside, you know, rehearsing what they want to say instead of listening to other people. And it's because we are afraid that we will say something wrong, that we will look wrong, and so on. So asking ourselves, oh, what is happening? Oh, I am afraid who is talking? It can be, you know, someone who is afraid of something, or it might be a teacher who wants to teach me something and so on. But. And when I answer this question for myself, then suddenly a bulb comes. Oh, okay, so what is. Then the next question would be, what is the goal of this person? What does this person doesn't want to do? And it's often like to protect me of something or to train me for the future conflict or something else. And then there comes better understanding of ourselves. That's why this language, this rules of being kind when we talk to ourselves really helps us find an answer. Actually we didn't see before. And that's been really, really enlightening for me and helpful for myself as well.
B
Very, very interesting. The questions in the 90 seconds, I think I've always seen and believed as well that, you know, there's this. I think it's called Murphy's Law, that a task is going to extend as long as you into as much time as you give it. You give it 90 days, it's going to take 90 days. You give it 10 seconds, it's going to take 10 seconds. Within reason. Don't get me wrong. I know, I know sometimes it's exaggerate, but in general there is, there is a tendency to fill the time that we have left with other tasks or reviews or more reflection or wasting time in general.
A
Yes. So actually I have someone, I know someone who said a very interesting thing that goes into what you just said. He said, I need three hours to complete a task, one to make the. To do actual work for the task and two hours to complain about it. And I think this is so true.
B
Yeah, yeah. When you just have to do it, you have half an hour instead of an hour, then you just do it in half an hour, you have no time to complain. I've even heard myself saying, I have no time to complain. I just have to do this. Right?
A
Yes.
B
In my head. Or actually saying it.
A
Yeah, yes, yes. But actually the complaints can be so interesting and so versatile. For example, sometimes just this, you know, this. That's already the complaint. And we are so creative in complaining. That's just amazing.
B
And gaming. Absolutely, absolutely, absolutely. So with all these things, and maybe it has to do with the 92nd thing that you mentioned or something entirely different. Is there some sort of life hacks that you can, you can, you can drop here like any, any or more than life hacks. Maybe it's more about self care hacks. Right? People love to, I say life hacks because people love to hear, oh, life hack, this is a life hack.
A
Yes.
B
Self care hacks are life hacks in general.
A
Yes.
B
I think it's more accurate to call them self care hacks, but I don't know. Like is there, are there any few from the writing of this book, from your experience, is there anything in this game master role that you would, you would leave the engagers with?
A
Yes. And again, reading the books about RPGs and also the handbooks, they were so enlightening. And I took a couple of life hacks or self care hacks from there and one of them is absolutely this active play thing. Is that so characteristic to RPGs that it is actually exciting to remind myself it is exciting. This unexpectedness of life is something that can be explored, that can be looked with curious eyes. So this one of them. But another was especially for Game Master and it was by Justin Alexander. In his book he said that game masters sometimes feel a bit overwhelmed and think that the players actually await from them or expect from them to know all the answers. So a player makes their move, say okay, I opened that door in the castle or whatever, or I try to take this booster or take this object and figure out how it works. And Game Master might not have planned for that move or for that to happen. So sometimes Game Masters can be feeling overwhelmed. And interestingly he says in his book that you don't have to have all the answers or to be stressed. But actually he said there is a very nice hack for it. Tell your player, yes, this can happen. So now what do you do if this happens? You know, so that was really interesting. And then I realized I can do it in my head as well. For example, if in my head I have some stressful thought, I don't want to do this anymore and I want to for example, quit my job and everything. And then I'm surprised and shocked that I have this thought and really do I want to do and then becomes this stressful moment and I'm thinking, well, I actually do can do this. Take the second think to my, to this player in my head saying, okay, this can happen. What do you do then? And when you look and when you start thinking past this, I want to quit the job. Okay, what do I do? If I quit this job then something happening. You know maybe I don't quite want to keep quit this job but I want maybe to change something. So what can I do? So this this was a really one of my favorite hacks that I found. So saying yes this happens. What do you do then so to to your to your player.
B
Interesting Interesting. Love it. Love it. Victoria, thank you as as always for all your insights and everything you you bring to this world. Not not the fewest of them. Writing 14 books on playful and gainful living for sure. Is there anything anything else you would like to say before we before we say it's game over.
A
For now I'm discovering further I'm writing more books so right now I'm writing gameful journaling. I discovered that my little yeah book that where I record all the things it's actually journaling so I'm exploring that and also writing collection of my real real life role playing games. Not rope just real life games or reality games as I call them. It's just I I think what I want to say is that never stop being playful and gameful because actually everything in life is a game because it has the same core components as anything in game and we forget it. And if we are aware that everything is gameful and playful then we can actually adjust it because we are designers of our designers and developers of our own lives so we can adjust it. We can be our best game masters. We can start the storytelling discovering how the other players in our heads and also outside of our heads can contribute to our game. So it's wonderful and I don't think I will ever stop it because it's so exciting and so fun and reading so many books. There are many books appearing which go into this direction. Yukai Chow has has recently released his 10 hours of play. Then there are many others with gameful perspective on job searching and so on. There are so many, so many inspiring and also books that for example by AJ Jacobs about living his life as an experiment or being a puzzler. So it's just amazing and it's not only it's also inside the games a game designing books are interesting but also there are many other people who go into this direction so it's fun to discover other life gamers.
B
Amazing. Amazing. Thanks thanks again for sharing Victoria. Always exciting to have you around. However thank you agers as we always like to say before we say it's game over that if you have any of if you want not only to turn these your own life into a game but maybe you're experiencing also this in your job. This could be also in your professional life, in your company, if you're, if you're listening in, or you're maybe a product manager, an innovation manager, and you want to use these strategies in your business, make sure you go on and grab our free guide, Core Drives in the Wild, which you can find a link in the description and without further ado, Engagers, Victoria and everybody listening, at least for now and for today. It is time to say that it's game over and thank you once again Engagers for hanging around after this interview and as I mentioned at the start, if you are interested in looking at our guide of the Core Drives in the Wild, especially for corporate and business settings. Now as a consultant the Octelis Group, I have access to some significant and interesting data and I can talk a lot more about the way we see things through the Optalysis framework. Just go to the link below, click there and we will send you an email sequence with all of these cases, Core Drives one by one, analyzing different situations and giving our strategic advice. So Engagers, thanks again for staying around and I'll talk to you and see you soon.
Title: Stop Overthinking in 90 Seconds with the "Brain Huddle" Trick
Host: Rob Alvarez
Guest: Victoria Ichizli-Bartels
Date: May 18, 2026
This episode explores how role-playing game (RPG) concepts — particularly the Game Master role — can be used as powerful self-leadership and self-care tools. Rob Alvarez is joined by author and playful living expert Victoria Ichizli-Bartels to discuss her latest book, in which she translates RPG principles into practical frameworks for personal growth, reducing overthinking, and embracing life’s unpredictability. Central to the episode is the "Brain Huddle" technique: a rapid strategy to achieve self-alignment and decision-making within 90 seconds.
Surprise and Curiosity Drive Engagement:
RPGs are inherently engaging because players don’t know what will happen next — a feeling called "active play."
Games vs. Real Life:
Exploring the boundaries between structured play and real-world unpredictability:
Origin of the Book:
Victoria, not a seasoned RPG player herself, was inspired by her son’s Dungeons & Dragons experiences and broader observations about self-leadership roles.
What Does It Mean to Be Your Own Game Master?
RPGs set up a collaborative, story-driven environment. Applying this metaphor, you can be both the "player" in your life and the "game master" setting the context and making decisions.
The Four Characters in Your Brain:
Inspired by Jill Bolte Taylor’s model (“Whole Brain Living”), Victoria explains that everyone hosts a cast of ~4 (up to 12!) inner players or characters, each with different agendas (18:35).
The “Brain Huddle” Process:
When faced with inner conflict, gather all your voices/players for a quick “huddle,” akin to a sports team strategizing before the next play.
Memorable Quote:
“You know, when you are confused, when you are conflicted inside yourself, give yourself 90 seconds, you find a solution.” — Victoria (18:44)
Mapping the Mind:
Just like RPGs sometimes use maps for exploration, mental mapping can provide clarity for navigating goals and challenges.
Game Rules and Player Etiquette:
Borrowing directly from RPG handbooks, self-leadership means applying rules like patience, curiosity, being open-minded — especially toward yourself.
Embrace Active Play:
Treat unexpected life events as opportunities for exploration, not threats.
The “Yes, and then what?” Hack:
When confronted by surprise or discomfort (e.g., an urge to quit your job), respond like a good Game Master:
Self-Compassion in Complaints:
Humor and curiosity when you notice your inner complaints can foster creativity (“We are so creative in complaining. That's just amazing.” — Victoria, 23:10)
On The Multiplicity of Inner Voices:
On Mapping and Cool-Down Phases:
On Playful Perspective:
Victoria encourages listeners to maintain playful, gameful attitudes, reminding us: “We are designers and developers of our own lives, so we can adjust it. We can be our best game masters.” (27:13)
Action Step: Next time you’re overthinking, try the 90-second Brain Huddle to quickly collaborate with the players in your mind — and turn uncertainty into your next adventure.
Listen. Learn. Apply play to your strategy.
(For additional resources and guides, see the episode description.)