Purely OCD – Episode Summary

Episode Title: Purely OCD with special guest Dillon Tucker
Date: September 20, 2024
Hosts: Lauren McMeikan Rosen, LMFT; Kelley Franke, LMFT
Guest: Dillon Tucker, filmmaker ("Pure O")

Episode Overview

This episode features filmmaker Dillon Tucker, who joins hosts Lauren and Kelley to discuss his semi-autobiographical film "Pure O," depicting the realities of living with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), specifically the "pure obsessional" or "Pure O" subtype. The group explores OCD representation in media, the significance of imaginal exposures in treatment, the broader impact of OCD on life and identity, and what effective recovery looks like. Throughout, they normalize the wide array of experiences and offer hope, practical insights, and culturally relevant support for those affected by OCD.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Dillon’s Story and Film (“Pure O”)

• Introduction to Dillon & “Pure O” [00:45–03:58]:

  • Dillon explains his late-onset OCD and initial misidentification as suicidal ideation, leading to a pivotal diagnosis and OCD treatment. He made "Pure O" to fill a gap in accurate cinematic representations of OCD and to educate as well as entertain.
  • Quote:

    “I was looking at sort of the mainstream space and not seeing a lot of films that represented my experience ... Whether it’s a quirky detective on Monk or As Good As It Gets... I wanted to see myself represented on the screen.”
    (Dillon, 02:41)

• Why Representation Matters [03:58–05:56]:

  • The film's intent: counter pop-culture stereotypes and highlight the diversity of OCD experiences.
  • The film uses realism and avoids typical “inside the mind” cinematic tricks, instead giving audiences intimate glimpses into the character’s struggle.

2. Therapeutic Tools Depicted: Focus on Imaginal Exposure

• Imaginal Exposure Scene [05:56–08:07]:

  • Dillon discusses the choice to depict imaginal exposure (writing or recording feared scenarios) and its immense value in his recovery.
  • Quote:

    “…imaginal exposures were the biggest thing that helped me in my own recovery. I used them quite a bit ... hearing my own voice saying it back to me really activated me in a way that was good ... you want to do the scariest thing.”
    (Dillon, 07:04)

• Clinical Explanation [08:07–09:10]:

  • Kelley clarifies, with examples, that imaginal exposures involve repeatedly imagining feared outcomes in vivid, present-tense detail until anxiety diminishes.
  • Quote:

    “…we listen to them kind of ad nauseam until we become bored almost with the content. … But the idea is it becomes less of a novel thing.”
    (Kelley, 08:36)

3. OCD as Part of a Whole Life: No Vacuum

• Life Beyond OCD & Functionality [09:13–16:07]:

  • Dillon wanted to show the main character as a complete person, maintaining relationships, work, and functionality even at severe anxiety levels.

  • Highlights the iceberg metaphor — much more suffering remains unseen.

  • Emphasizes how the film helps family members and partners understand OCD through a cinematic, emotional lens.

  • Quote:

    “…if you’re actually seeing it break through, I mean, that’s just like an iceberg thing. Like, if you’re seeing it, everything else that’s going on underneath… must be very deep and extreme.”
    (Dillon, 10:56)

  • The parallel between addiction/recovery and mental health/ OCD recovery is drawn, stressing the importance of support systems and community.

  • Quote:

    “It feels like you’re so alone and it feels like you’re white-knuckling it. But really the only way through all that is to really let other people in your life and to be vulnerable and to share your world and let them share yours.”
    (Dillon, 13:24)

4. Stigma, Self-Recognition, and the Power of Storytelling

• Shifting Self-Understanding [14:54–16:07]:
  • Dillon addresses the stigma he himself carried and how lived experience changed his perspective.
  • By showcasing multiple viewpoints (the sufferer, loved ones), the film aims to foster empathy and broader understanding.

5. Dillon’s Themes and Subtypes of OCD

• Personal Themes [17:35–19:26]:

  • Dillon details his specific OCD content: initially harm OCD (suicidal ideation fears), then harm toward others, followed by relationship OCD during his engagement.
  • Film features other subtypes such as hit-and-run, pedophilia, scrupulosity, and more within group therapy scenes.

• Universal Nature of Treatment [19:38–20:39]:

  • Hosts remind listeners: the “work is the same regardless” of OCD theme. Tools like exposure and response prevention (ERP) generalize across content.

6. Skills for OCD and Life

• Therapeutic Skills Transfer [20:39–24:33]:

  • Dillon reports OCD skills (esp. mindfulness/meditation) ripple out positively into all aspects of his life, easing stress and increasing gratitude.
  • Quote:

    “…all of the tools that go into OCD recovery, I think absolutely work in your generalized life... Just made my life better.”
    (Dillon, 22:58)

• Importance of Being Ready [21:22–22:14]:

  • Change often requires hitting “rock bottom”; not everyone is ready for treatment at first.

7. Advocacy, Diagnosis, and Delays in Care

• Barriers and Aha Moments [24:36–28:09]:
  • Both hosts and Dillon share how it took years (sometimes over a decade) to be correctly diagnosed with OCD.
  • The film has helped audience members recognize undiagnosed OCD in themselves and their family.
  • Quote (Host Lauren):

    “It was 17 years right from onset to correct diagnosis. And I was a kid and I had no idea.... it is so incredibly isolating and so scary to not know what it is that you’re experiencing.”
    (Lauren, 28:25)

8. Hope, Help, and the Message of Recovery

• Dillon’s Message to Struggling Listeners [32:18–36:07]:
  • “This is not a death sentence.” Even if it feels all-consuming, effective treatment exists.
  • Importance of trusted therapy and trusted disclosure of taboo themes.
  • OCD is lifelong but manageable; recovery allows you to thrive, not just survive.
  • Quote:

    “Once you actually get into the specialized treatment sooner than later, most people are going to get better ... If you’re going through it right now, you are in the worst of it and ... you can get better. And not only get better, you can thrive.”
    (Dillon, 35:18)

Memorable Quotes & Timestamps

• “I wanted to ground [the film] in reality ... It’s a hard thing to do because it’s an invisible illness and it’s in one’s head.” (Dillon, 05:56)
• “The idea is that it becomes less of a novel thing.” (Kelley, 08:38)
• “...if you’re actually seeing it break through, I mean, that’s just like an iceberg thing.” (Dillon, 10:56)
• “It feels like you're so alone ... but really the only way through ... is to let other people in.” (Dillon, 13:24)
• “My own judgment stigmas ... I was always an ally and an advocate, but ... I don’t have a mental health [issue] ... you realize, oh wait, you know, I am human and this is something that can happen to anyone.” (Dillon, 14:55–15:07)
• “I think that most people with OCD, it really is that first acute onset period that you really are grappling with ... I don’t think it could ever be as bad as that first wave because I won’t allow it to.” (Dillon, 34:35)

Timestamps for Major Segments

• 00:45–03:58: Dillon’s background and motivation for making “Pure O”
• 05:56–08:07: Portrayal and importance of imaginal exposures
• 10:14–16:07: Depicting the whole person—OCD as one part of life, cultural/family context
• 17:35–19:26: Dillon’s OCD themes and subtypes addressed in the film
• 20:39–24:33: Generalization of skills outside of OCD, the role of mindfulness/meditation
• 28:09–29:56: The long road to diagnosis; impact of seeing oneself in stories
• 32:18–36:07: Dillon’s closing words of hope for those struggling

Final Takeaways & Resources

• OCD is highly treatable and not a life sentence.
• Accurate, sensitive representation in media is powerful—both for sufferers and for their loved ones.
• Recovery is possible and can lead to thriving.
• Resources mentioned:
  • International OCD Foundation (IOCDF)
  • Made of Millions
  • OCDLA (Los Angeles)

“You can accomplish your dreams and ... not only get better, but you can thrive.”
(Dillon, 35:51)