Radiolab: "Sleepless in South Sudan"
Podcast: Radiolab (WNYC Studios)
Hosts: Jad Abumrad & Robert Krulwich
Storyteller: Carl Zimmer
Date: October 31, 2011
Episode Runtime: ~24 min
Episode Overview
This episode of Radiolab departs from its usual mix of science and investigative reporting to focus on a deeply personal story told by science writer Carl Zimmer. Set against the backdrop of war-torn South Sudan in the late 1990s, Zimmer explores the intersection of science, mortality, and personal grief. Through vivid storytelling and moments of existential reflection, the episode discusses how encounters with disease and death, both in Africa and at home, changed Zimmer’s outlook on life, loss, and the drive to live.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Arrival in South Sudan & Dangers of Disease
- [02:34-06:50] Carl Zimmer’s Voice
- Zimmer wakes in South Sudan during a civil war—despite not being near a frontline, the region teems with dangers.
- Disease Threats:
- Sleeping sickness from tsetse flies (deadly without treatment, and treatment itself is "basically arsenic").
- Guinea worm infestation ("grows inside you, causes blisters, only relief comes from water, spreading more larvae").
- Malaria described as “the worst malaria in the world”—can quickly kill if untreated.
- Quote ([03:43]):
“There were so many ways to get sick… You actually really couldn’t get sick anywhere else in the world.”
- Zimmer admits to being a hypochondriac: “Every time I got a fever, I was sure it was going to be meningitis...” ([05:30])
2. Personal Backstory: Loss of Esther
- [07:50-10:22]
- Zimmer recounts his early journalism career: unfulfilled, searching for meaning.
- Explains relationship with Esther—from high school sweethearts to facing her surprising diagnosis of rare pancreatic cancer in their 20s.
- Quote ([09:23]):
“You don’t think about cancer when you’re mid-20s… and so as a result, this cancer had moved really fast and spread very far by the time it was detected.”
- The couple fights the illness optimistically but Esther dies within months.
- Grief lingers, coloring Zimmer’s return to work and everyday experiences.
3. Coping, Hypochondria, and Obsession with Science
- [10:22-12:50]
- Zimmer finds himself obsessed with hidden dangers—symptoms, diseases—which leads him to repeatedly request medical tests.
- Grapples with the fear of mortality, feeling as though everyone is obliviously “walking on a thin sheet of glass.”
- Quote ([12:28]):
“I was so dissatisfied. I was in perfect health, and it was terrible.”
4. Discovering Beauty and Meaning in Biology
- [11:10-12:15]
- Finds solace in scientific investigation—writing about the “complicated and incredibly beautiful” nature of water molecules.
- Draws an analogy between scientific discovery and reconnecting with an old friend.
- Quote ([11:28]):
“Those water molecules… in a weird way, have been waiting all this time for us to understand them and to get to know them.”
5. Evolution, Metamorphosis, and Grief
- [13:00-14:43]
- Turns to the study of evolution and transformation as a way of finding new meaning—cites Ovid’s Metamorphosis.
- Finds comfort in the idea that suffering can yield "something beautiful" through change.
- Quote ([14:38]):
"So these sailors are horrified to watch their hands disappearing… And I was reading that, and I would think, you know, I’ve seen that kind of change myself in my own life."
6. Return to Africa: Seeking Parasites
- [15:00-19:30]
- Zimmer becomes fascinated—almost reverent—about parasites, calling himself “an aficionado of the strangest, most extreme parasites.”
- Describes making trips to Africa in search of stories about parasitic diseases.
- Memorable moments:
- Learning about Loa Loa—the worm you can see crawl across your eyeball ([17:37]).
- The suspense of entering South Sudan without stamped passports, “going off the grid” ([18:55]).
7. A Second Life and Acceptance
- [20:05-21:30]
- Zimmer reflects on his life after returning from South Sudan: new love, two daughters, an enduring sense of awe and gratitude.
- Recognizes that threats—parasites, disease, mortality—are not banishable but can be lived with.
- Quote ([20:47]):
“You can never get away from them totally… But I don’t go to places like South Sudan anymore, mainly for their sake.”
8. Epilogue: The Drive to Live
- [21:40-23:25]
- Zimmer recalls the panic of seeing holes in his mosquito net under the South Sudanese moonlight: “There are holes in it. I could see them in the moonlight. And I was—I could feel this kind of panic coming up…”
- Describes a voice within resisting resignation to death—“that was myself… There was this drive that I felt. I was not going to just fall asleep again.”
- Quote ([23:03]):
“We live. We keep living. If death comes into the neighborhood, we’re going to fight it. And that is true. That’s a rule. And it’s real. It’s as real as those water molecules floating in space for billions of years.”
- Concludes by emphasizing the vitality of that drive—a universal force.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments (with Timestamps)
-
On the pervasiveness of hidden dangers:
“There are so many ways to get sick and so many ways you could get sick in South Sudan that you actually really couldn’t get sick anywhere else in the world.” —Carl Zimmer ([03:43])
-
On grief:
“After a few months, she died, and I lived. So I went away for a few months, and then I came back, and I came back to my job, and I was writing about science, and it was different.” —Carl Zimmer ([10:13])
-
On the beauty of discovery:
“Those water molecules… in a weird way, have been waiting all this time for us to understand them and to get to know them.” —Carl Zimmer ([11:28])
-
On transformation and loss:
“So these sailors are horrified to watch their hands disappearing and turning into just flippers… And I was reading that, and I would think, you know, I’ve seen that kind of change myself in my own life.” —Carl Zimmer ([14:38])
-
On the persistence of mortality and awe:
“You can never get away from them totally… We are human. But I don’t go to places like South Sudan anymore, mainly for their sake.” —Carl Zimmer ([20:47])
-
On the innate drive to survive:
“We live. We keep living. If death comes into the neighborhood, we’re going to fight it. And that is true. That’s a rule. And it’s real. It’s as real as those water molecules floating in space for billions of years.” —Carl Zimmer ([23:03])
Major Segments & Timestamps
| Timestamp | Segment/Topic | |-----------|---------------------------------------------------| | 01:27 | Introduction to the story and Carl Zimmer | | 02:34 | Waking in South Sudan—diseases and threats | | 07:50 | Carl’s career start and meeting Esther | | 09:23 | Esther’s illness, diagnosis, and passing | | 10:22 | Returning to science writing, hypochondria | | 11:28 | The allure of water molecules, finding meaning | | 13:00 | Evolution, Metamorphosis and transformation | | 15:00 | Fascination with parasites, decision to return | | 17:37 | Loa Loa—seeing parasites firsthand | | 18:55 | Entering South Sudan without stamped passports | | 20:05 | Life after: new family, lingering anxiety | | 21:40 | Night panic, voice of resistance | | 23:03 | Universal will to live summarized | | 23:57 | Closing remarks and credits |
Tone and Storytelling Style
Carl Zimmer’s storytelling is candid, humble, and gently philosophical, blending self-deprecating humor with deep vulnerability. The narrative evokes both the visceral fears of illness and the wonder of scientific discovery, with a recurring motif: the persistence of life in the face of inevitable death. The tone is reflective, at times melancholy, but ultimately grounded in gratitude and an acceptance of life’s drive to endure.
Final Thoughts
"Sleepless in South Sudan" pushes Radiolab beyond its usual investigative storytelling into the realm of personal revelation. Through Carl Zimmer’s journey—from grief and hypochondria to wonder, family, and acceptance—the episode finds surprising warmth and beauty in life’s fragility. It is an ode to science, curiosity, and the enduring human spirit.