***Guest Appearance

Credits to:

“How to Raise Private Money WITHOUT Asking For It feat. Jay Conner | Thought Leader Spotlight”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=soyepl3KZ1A&t=34s

If you’re a real estate investor, you’ve undoubtedly heard that access to capital is one of the greatest challenges—and most crucial factors—in growing your business. While many investors rely on banks or hard money lenders, the world of private money offers a game-changing alternative. In a recent episode of the Raising Private Money podcast, together with Matt Kamp, Jay Conner, the Private Money Authority, who’s raised over $8.5 million from 47 private lenders, shared his strategies for raising private money without ever “asking” for it.

Whether you’re just getting started or looking to expand your real estate portfolio, here’s a breakdown of the key insights from Jay Conner’s conversation with Matt Kamp that can help you leverage private money for maximum impact.

Understanding Private Money: What Sets It Apart?

First, it’s essential to clarify what private money means—and, just as importantly, what it does not mean. In Jay Conner’s definition, private money lending is not hard money. Hard money lenders typically pool funds from private individuals and lend out of that fund, but when Jay Conner talks about private money, he’s referring to direct relationships with individual lenders—people just like you, who may want to loan money for a secured, solid return.

Private lenders often use one of two sources:

Their investment capital (personal savings or investment accounts)
Their retirement funds, often via a self-directed IRA

Unlike joint ventures or partnerships, private lenders do not take equity in your deals. Instead, they have the same legal protections as a traditional mortgage lender—their loans are secured against your real estate, not unsecured.

The Warm Market: Where to Find Private Lenders

So, where do you find these lenders? Jay Conner breaks this down into three categories:

Warm Market: People you already know—friends, family, colleagues, fellow churchgoers, social media connections.
Expanded Warm Market: Connections of your network and people you get to know through networking (the more you “wallow in money,” Jay Conner says, the more it sticks to you!).
Existing Private Lenders: Individuals already lending on other investors’ deals—which you can identify through public documents like mortgage filings or by networking at real estate events.

Your cellphone and social circles are goldmines: Every retiree, professional, or financially savvy contact could be a potential lender.

The “Teacher Hat” Approach: Educate, Don’t Beg

Jay Conner’s twist is that he’s never asked anyone to fund a deal directly; instead, he educates his network about what private lending is and what his program offers. Here’s how:

Make a List: Start with your top 50 contacts, focusing on retirees or those unhappy with stock market volatility.
Lead with “Did You Know?” Questions: For example, “Did you know there’s a way to earn unlimited tax-free income with your IRA?” This opens conversations about self-directed IRAs and private lending.
Present a Program, Not a Plea: Don’t ask for money. Teach your contact what private lending looks like, the returns, protections, and process. Position yourself as an educator.
Follow a Two-Step Process: Teach first, then (in a different conversation) call with a specific deal, stating, “I can now put your money to work on XYZ property. Here are the instructions.” This confident script ensures you never sound desperate.

Benefits of Private Money: Control and Flexibility

Why go to all this trouble? The advantages are numerous:

No credit or lengthy bank approvals: Underwriting is based on the deal’s merits.
Flexible payback: Structure no monthly payments and accrue interest.
100% financing—including renovations: Bring home a check at closing instead of putting cash in.
**Use funds for any real estate asset, including single-family, multifamily, office, and land.

Automating Your Real Estate Business

Jay Conner also delved into building and automating a lean business. Get your core team in place first (real estate attorney, realtor, home inspector, and, if needed, an appraiser), and consider hiring acquisitionists and virtual assistants trained by professionals.

The Takeaway

Raising private money is about confidence, education, and positioning. By becoming a resource and teaching your network—not selling to them—you create win-win opportunities, never have to beg for deals, and can fund unlimited growth.

Want a deeper dive? Download Jay Conner’s free “7 Reasons Why Private Money Will Skyrocket Your Real Estate Business” guide at www.JayConner.com/Moneyguide. Your first private lender could be one conversation away.

10 Discussion Questions from this Episode

How did Jay Conner's background in manufactured housing influence his approach to real estate investing and private money?
What were the key factors that pushed Jay Conner to seek out private money, and how did he view the financial crisis as an opportunity?
Jay Conner mentions never asking anyone for money directly. What strategies does he use instead, and why do you think they’re effective?
How does the concept of “putting on your teacher hat” transform the private money conversation, according to Jay Conner?
What role do self-directed IRAs play in raising private money, and why are they significant for both investors and lenders?
Compare and contrast private lenders and hard money lenders as explained by Jay Conner. What makes their approaches and relationships different?
Matt Kamp and Jay Conner discuss automation in real estate investing. What team members and systems does Jay Conner recommend to automate and scale a business?
In the process of engaging private lenders, Jay Conner emphasizes separating the teaching from the pitch. Why is this distinction important?
What documents and protections are essential for both investors and private lenders during a typical transaction, as described in the episode?
Based on Jay Conner's experience, what are the most common mistakes new real estate investors make when trying to raise private money or automate their business, and how can they be avoided?

Fun facts that were revealed in the episode:

No Asking, Just Teaching: Jay Conner has never asked anyone directly for money to fund his deals. Instead, he educates his network about private lending and lets opportunities present themselves, using what he calls his "teacher hat" approach.
Zero Missed Opportunities: Since discovering private money in 2009 after his traditional funding dried up, Jay Conner has never missed out on a real estate deal due to a lack of funds.
Automated Success: Jay Conner nets over seven figures annually while spending only about five hours per week on his real estate business, thanks to automating and delegating nearly every aspect of his operations.

Timestamps:

00:00 Introducing Jay Conner, Real Estate Expert

05:28 Finding and landing your first deal

07:00 Explaining private lending basics

12:38 Discussing unlimited tax-free earnings

14:31 New investor phone call script

17:51 Insurance and private lending benefits

21:20 Real estate team essentials

24:14 Automating with virtual assistants

27:34 Free private money guide download

Connect With Jay Conner:

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