***Guest Appearance

Credits to:

“Real Estate Success: From Bank Rejection to $2M in 90 Days | Jay Conner’s Private Money Blueprint”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o0yMZaYE3fk&t=2s

If you’ve ever faced the sudden loss of traditional funding as a real estate investor, you know the feeling: panic, frustration, and a moment of reflection about how to keep your business alive. This was the pivotal moment Jay Conner faced back in January 2009 when his long-standing line of credit was suddenly withdrawn—no warning, no backup plan. Yet rather than accept defeat, he pivoted to a new way of thinking: attracting private money.

In the recent episode of the Raising Private Money podcast, Jay Conner joined Leo Pareja and shared the strategies and mindset shifts that not only saved his business but helped it thrive beyond what traditional financing could ever offer.

Shifting the Mindset: From Begging to Teaching

Jay’s first lesson is all about mindset. Too often, real estate investors approach raising capital with a sense of desperation, especially when a deal is at stake. As Jay puts it, “Desperation’s got a smell to it. The worst time in the world to be looking for private money is when you need it for a deal.” To avoid this, he repositions the investor from a beggar to a teacher—someone who introduces a new opportunity to people unaware of the private lending world.

Rather than chasing, persuading, or begging for money, Jay advocates for leading with a servant’s heart, exposing your network to the concept of private money, and teaching them what you offer well before you have a deal on the table. The secret sauce is to build relationships first and teach the program, not pitch individual deals. This approach means the money is ready and waiting, removing stress and shifting the power dynamic in your favor.

Structuring the Conversation

So, what does a real-life conversation look like? Jay suggests starting with your own network—people you go to church with, friends, family, and anyone with whom you already have trust. As he recounted, he approached a friend at church not directly to ask for money, but instead to ask for help referring others who might be dissatisfied with their investment returns. This “I need your help” approach piques curiosity and often leads to the person wanting to get involved themselves.

When they show interest, avoid the mistake of giving away all the details at once. Instead, share just enough to get them intrigued ("greed glands swelling," as Jay jokingly calls it), then sit down to teach them about the program: interest rates, security, and how their investment is protected. Only after they understand and are excited do you bring them a deal, using Jay's "good news phone call" script—a confident, matter-of-fact notice that their money can now be put to work.

Building a Pipeline: One-on-One and Group Presentations

Jay emphasizes that your initial private lenders often come from one-on-one conversations, but scaling up requires a broader approach. He suggests hosting "private lender luncheons," inviting people in your network to a group presentation where you teach the opportunity and answer questions, all without pitching specific deals. With this method, you can attract substantial sums—Jay raised nearly a million dollars from just one luncheon.

Additionally, using educational audio recordings, brief and tantalizing, can spur potential lenders to reach out to you, saving you from the traditional chase. Sharing insights about tax-free returns with self-directed IRAs is another way to open conversations and provide real value.

Adapting Strategy to the Market

The exit strategy for your deals—whether BRRRR, flipping, or lease-purchase—depends on current market conditions. Flexibility and market awareness give you more options to produce returns for your private lenders, maintaining their trust and excitement in continuing to invest with you.Final Takeaway

The best time to raise private money is before you need it. By serving and educating your network, you create a pipeline of ready funds and lifelong relationships, allowing you to move quickly and confidently on opportunities. Jay Conner's journey is proof that when traditional financing dries up, a shift in mindset and a focus on relationships can unlock a world of private money—and take your business to the next level.

For more in-depth strategies, check out Jay Conner’s book, podcast, or even attend his live events—details are available through his site and podcast channels.

10 Discussion Questions from this Episode

How did losing access to traditional bank financing act as a catalyst for discovering private money strategies in the stories shared?
What are the key differences between raising private money and securing funding from traditional institutions, as explained in the episode?
Why is it important to separate teaching about the opportunity from pitching individual deals to potential private lenders?
How does approaching private lender relationships with a “servant’s heart” impact the results, according to the speaker’s experience?
What are the main steps involved in the process of raising private money as described in the episode?
How does mindset influence success when seeking and managing private lender relationships?
The episode detailed a “good news phone call” script—what makes this approach effective in securing private funding?
What role does networking within your existing community and contacts play in sourcing private lenders, based on the examples given?
How should real estate investors adapt their exit strategies—like flipping versus holding—based on current market conditions?
What strategies for sourcing off-market deals were outlined, and how can investors apply these in today’s environment?

Fun facts that were revealed in the episode:

The "Good News Phone Call" Script
One of the most successful techniques described for raising private money is the use of a "good news phone call." Instead of asking if someone wants to fund a deal, the call is simply to inform them their money is ready to be put to work—a strategy that builds excitement and anticipation for the opportunity.
Private Lender Luncheons Yield Big Results
A single private lender luncheon—featuring lunch at a local oceanfront club and a PowerPoint teaching session—brought in $969,000 in pledges, showcasing the power of group education over individual pitching.
Curiosity Builds Commitment
Handing out a simple 16-minute audio recording, which purposefully never shares interest rates or deal details but just piques curiosity, converted an acquaintance into a $650,000 private lender—demonstrating that intrigue can be one of the best tools in raising funds.

Timestamps:

00:00 Starting with traditional financing

04:10 Line of credit closed unexpectedly

07:50 First real estate seminar experience

13:14 Mindset and teaching private lenders

17:17 Telling Wayne about investment opportunities

18:06 Discussing interest rates with Wayne

22:29 Leo is eager to fund the deal

26:10 Introducing Private Money Concept

30:02 Shifting from lease to flip houses

32:52 Lender wants profit participation

36:25 Using Google and private money in real estate

38:36 Offering a free real estate book

Connect With Jay Conner:

Private Money Academy Conference:

https://www.ThePrivateMoneyConference.com

Free Report:

https://www.jayconner.com/MoneyReport

Join the Private Money Academy:

https://www.JayConner.com/trial/

Have you read Jay’s new book, Where to Get the Money Now?

It is available FREE (all you pay is the shipping and handling) at https://www.JayConner.com/Book

What is Private Money? Real Estate Investing with Jay Conner

http://www.JayConner.com/MoneyPodcast

Jay Conner is a proven leader in real estate investing. Without using his own money or credit, Jay maximizes creative methods to buy and sell properties with profits averaging $86,000 per deal.

#RealEstate #RealEstateI