Transcript
A (0:00)
James, I feel really lucky. By the time this episode comes out, I will be married. And you were at my wedding. You probably saw the incredible dance moves. Just kidding. But what I want you all to know, seriously, is I'm truly lucky because I've only had one partner. One partner. Her name is Alice. And we were dating for, I want to say, about six and a half years until we got married. And I was talking to my brother about this, and he was saying, wow, that's really different. I've been on hundreds of dates trying to find the right one, and I just don't know how I'm gonna find it. What did you do? And I said, to be honest, it was just a feeling. And he told me a story about when he actually went and saw a therapist about his dating, because he's like, I need to figure out a way to find my person. And he used to have a long list of, I want them to work out and have these interests, even if they're not the same to me. I want them to be passionate. And one therapist said, okay, pretend they've done all of those things and you now get to be with that person. How would you feel? And he said, well, now that you say it, I actually don't think it would be enough. And the therapist said, why? You said, these are what you wanted, and now those are done. He said, it's just a feeling. And so this feeling that I'm talking about with relationships today, which will be a topic of discussion, relates to financial planning and the trust of when you work with Root. I don't know how long any of you have been watching the YouTube videos, listening to the podcast, but if you don't mind putting in the comments below. Have you been listening, watching for a month, a year, a few years? You probably have a relationship with us in some sense, which can feel odd, but it's very real. So, James, is there a relationship that you can think back on, whether it's a romantic partner or otherwise, where you went, look, it was just a feeling that made me think maybe this isn't the right fit, romantically or otherwise.
B (1:52)
Yeah, this. This episode of Root Talks, we'll call this Root Talks Relationships. We're going to give some. Some advice here. Yeah, I think that we've all been there of feeling like something on paper should work, whether it's relationship, romantic relationship, whether it was a friendship of, gosh, we should be friends with these people. They have young kids, we have young kids. They have these interests. We have these interests. They live here. We live here and just for whatever reason, we don't jive and we don't feel like we fully connect. So I think we've all had those and we've had other ones where on paper, I couldn't imagine a more different person, but this is an amazing friendship, or maybe some cases this is an amazing romantic relationship. And there is something there. And what you start to realize is that feeling is I. You know, we call it a feeling, but it's. What is. What's the right word for it? There's. I forget what. But it's. It's a. Like that feeling in many cases is just condensed pattern recognition of. We go through our lives. We go through our lives over several years and decades and interactions and new experiences and new people. And that feeling is not just some random emotion that bubbles up or doesn't bubble up. It is pattern recognition. Like your mind senses something that maybe you can't even consciously put words to what it is, but your brain recognizes it and gives you this feeling of this is going to work or this is not going to work. And I think that the older we get, the more and more we should trust what that feeling is, because that feeling is not just emotional, but there's also a lot of subconscious programming going on realizing, like, you've had these experiences before, this type of person matches this, whatever that might be. And I'd give a lot of credence to whatever that feeling is.
