1041. Q&AF: Developing Leadership Qualities, Defense Or Offense & Aiming High Vs Being Realistic

Summary

REAL AF with Andy Frisella

Episode 1041 — Q&AF: Developing Leadership Qualities, Defense Or Offense & Aiming High Vs Being Realistic

Date: June 29, 2026
Host: Andy Frisella
Co-host: DJ

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Episode Overview

This Q&AF episode centers around three listener-submitted questions covering the themes of authentic leadership, the difference between playing defense and offense in business, and the dangers of setting “realistic” rather than ambitious goals. Andy Frisella provides candid, hard-hitting answers, using personal stories and analogies to break down what it takes to win—whether it’s leading people, growing a business, or pushing towards greatness in life.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Developing Leadership Qualities: How Do You Become a Leader People Want to Follow?

[04:36–22:33]

• Self-Awareness = Foundation of Real Leadership:

  • Andy praises the listener for questioning their own leadership ability, pointing out that “the worst leaders on earth believe they're the best leaders on earth.”
    • "The fact that you're even considering or asking the question tells me that you have the capacity to be a great leader." – Andy, [05:30]

• Leadership is a Role, Not Authority:

  • Effective leaders don’t lord over others—they see leadership as a role on a team with mutual responsibility for the mission.
  • Servant leadership is key: helping the team develop, finding the right answers collaboratively, and advancing toward shared goals.
    • "It's not about authority as much as it is a role on a team that has to be executed effectively to produce the outcome." – Andy, [05:44]

• Lead by Example:

  • Andy cites Vince Lombardi:
    • "Leading by example isn’t the best way to lead. It’s the only way to lead." – Andy referencing Lombardi, [08:06]
  • It’s crucial to do, or at least be willing to do, any job you ask of your team—even if you’re not the best at it.

• Ego is the Enemy:

  • Emphasizes the importance of suppressing ego and focusing on the mission and the team first.
    • "If you're a general and you're not willing to listen to the guys on the front line, you're going to get people killed." – Andy, [10:04]

• Accountability—To Yourself First:

  • DJ recalls how Andy’s ability to hold others accountable is rooted in holding himself accountable first:
    • "I have no problem holding myself accountable." – Andy, [19:55]
  • Admitting mistakes to your team actually builds trust, rather than diminishing authority.
    • "It's about being accountable to the team, and a lot of people won't do that because they think that it, like, dilutes, when actually it builds." – Andy, [20:44]

• Initiative & Lifelong Learning:

  • Great leaders take initiative—before they have the title, just by stepping up and "moving the rocks from there to there."
  • Leadership is a lifelong journey; those who stop learning, growing, and leading by example stagnate quickly, often losing good people.

"Great leaders, they don’t focus on how great they're doing. They focus on the shit that they fucked up so they don’t do it again." – Andy, [22:06]

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2. Defense or Offense: How Should Owners Approach Business Growth?

[22:43–30:53]

• Offense Is the Only Way:

  • The listener—a long-time employee now turned owner—admits to making safety-driven decisions, fearing the loss of what he bought, rather than trying to grow.
  • Andy’s blunt response:
    • "Anything but offense is losing in business, okay? You trying to protect your business is like going out and trying to play a football game with only the defense on the field." – Andy, [23:06]
  • “Maintaining” a business is an illusion. If you aren’t moving forward, you’re moving backward.

• The Difference Between Builders and Buyers:

  • Andy explains the mindset difference between founders and new owners (who may not have experienced building from zero):
    • "The second best thing you can do is pretend that you’re at zero. ...What are you going to do to get it to 100? ...a 1000? That’s where your mentality needs to be or you’re going to get destroyed, dude." – Andy, [25:43]

• Innovation, Growth, and Competition:

  • Andy gives the rare example of a static business (Rao’s restaurant in NYC), but stresses that every long-term winning company innovates and evolves.
  • He criticizes internet gurus promoting the idea of buying businesses as passive investments:
    • "You can buy all the businesses you want, but that don’t mean you know how to fucking run them." – Andy, [27:24]

"Playing defense and protecting what you have is always a failing strategy." – Andy, [30:50]

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3. Aim High or Stay “Realistic”? Why Big Goals Matter

[30:53–41:13]

• Small Goals Create More Losers Than Big Failures:

  • Listener challenges the claim that “aiming too high” leads to failure, noting more people quietly lower their standards.
  • Andy responds forcefully:
    • "Aren’t they the same thing? ...Why do you think I get so irritated with people who say realistic goals, realistic goals, realistic goals? No, it’s not about realistic goals because the minute you hit it, you celebrate... and you end up losing by default." – Andy, [31:27]

• Winning Is Math, Not Magic:

  • Success is about improving every day, aiming high, and compounding small wins—not getting lucky.
    • "It is literally math. It’s your win today, you win tomorrow, you win the next day, you win the day after that..." – Andy, [35:13]

• Belief, Environment, and Obligation to Inspire:

  • Many are surrounded by people with limited mindsets; their environment discourages high achievement.
  • Andy urges listeners to break the cycle for themselves and for their surrounding culture.
    • "If people don’t see someone that they know, they continue to believe that losing is the only real option they have... Your job is to show them what winning looks like." – Andy, [39:17]

• Use Dark-Side Energy & Defiance:

  • Encourages having some “fuck you” in your heart to push past doubters and obstacles (without always expressing it outwardly).
    • “You got to be willing to look at people that laugh at you and be like, hey man, fuck you. Now, you don't have to say it, but if you don’t think it, you shouldn’t even go.” – Andy, [37:28]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Leadership:

  • "If you're not living the standard, if you're not willing to hold yourself accountable to the same standards that you hold the team, nobody's going to believe anything that you say." – Andy, [08:06]
  • "Leadership is a lifelong journey. It's a lifelong learning process. You're gonna make mistakes, you're gonna fuck up." – Andy, [11:49]

• On Taking Initiative:

  • "The taking initiative to just do the things that you observe need to be done is leading." – Andy, [13:24]

• On Business Ownership:

  • "There is no maintaining, there is no protecting. The best way to protect what you have is to continue to grow it." – Andy, [23:07]
  • "Maintaining is an illusion—if you’re not innovating and growing, you’re moving backward." – Andy, [25:29]

• On Aiming High:

  • "Setting goals that are too small creates more losers than really anything else." – Andy, [32:33]
  • "Why don’t you believe in yourself enough to create greatness?" – Andy, [34:54]
  • "If you want your kid to actually win, your kid's gonna get hurt. That’s reality. That’s how it works." – Andy, [32:08]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• 04:36: Question 1 – Leadership qualities: How to become a leader people genuinely want to follow
• 08:06: Leading by example & the necessity of personal standards
• 11:51: Holding yourself accountable to hold others accountable
• 13:24: Initiative and how “leading” starts before the title
• 22:43: Question 2 – Defense vs. offense in business ownership
• 25:29: Difference in mentality: business builder vs. business “inheritor”
• 27:24: Critique of business-buying fad; importance of knowing how to operate
• 30:53: Question 3 – Dangers of “realistic” goals and why people aim low
• 35:13: Pursuing ambitious goals as a compounding, step-by-step process
• 37:28: The necessity of dark-side energy (“fuck you” motivation)
• 39:17: Your obligation to inspire and lead cultural change by example

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Summary Tone

The tone is straight-shooting, energetic, and no-nonsense, reflecting Andy’s trademark style: “real talk” with occasional tough language and humor, but always rooted in experience and actionable insight. The mix of practical business advice and mindset coaching will resonate with both aspiring and established leaders, entrepreneurs, and anyone in need of a push out of mediocrity.

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Bottom Line:
Leadership is an action, not a position. Winning in business means constantly playing offense, not clinging to what you’ve got. And if your goals don’t scare you, they’re not big enough—aim up, not safe.

Transcript

[Unknown Rapper]

Yeah, we're from sleeping on the floor now my jury box froze up Pole stove Counted millions in a cold bad booted swole Got her own bank roll can't fold that's a no head shot. Case closed.

[Andrew Purcell]

What is up? Guys, it's Andrew Purcell and this is the show for the realists. Say goodbye to the lies, the fakeness and delusions of modern society and welcome to reality, guys. Today we have Q&AF. That's where you submit the question questions and we give you the answers. You could submit your questions a couple different ways. DJ will tell you how.

[DJ]

Yeah, guys, you can email your questions into askandy andy4seller.com. You guys can also click the link in the description below, submit them there, or just drop them in the comment section of the Q and A of videos right here on YouTube.

[Andrew Purcell]

You guys know how it works. We're gonna have shows within the show throughout the week. We're gonna have. Probably CTI might hit you with a special 4th of July CTI this week. We know we've been, you know, on and off schedule, but I have other things that have have to be done. I'm not a full time podcaster, contrary to what the Internet thinks.

[DJ]

That's right.

[Andrew Purcell]

There is a fee for the show. The fee is very simple. Share the show, man. All right. We don't do ads on this show. We're the biggest show in the world that doesn't do ads. And the reason we don't do ads is because I don't want people thinking that I'm getting paid to say anything. So it's very simple. If the show makes you think, it makes you laugh, gives you new perspective, you learn something. If you think it's worth sharing, do us a favor, man, and help us grow the show by sharing it. So don't be a hoe.

[DJ]

Share the show.

[Andrew Purcell]

All right.

[DJ]

What's up, my brother?

[Andrew Purcell]

Yeah, no shit, man. Were you about to start a race riot?

[DJ]

Yeah, my dad called me Malcolm xl.

[Andrew Purcell]

Malcolm xl.

[DJ]

That's not funny.

[Andrew Purcell]

Malcolm xxl.

[DJ]

Oh, no, come on, man.

[Andrew Purcell]

That's who you used to be. Now you're just xl.

[DJ]

That's right.

[Unknown Rapper]

All right.

[DJ]

That's right. That's right. What's going on though, man?

[Andrew Purcell]

Nothing, dude.

[DJ]

Yeah, dude, the blue light actually does help. It does.

[Andrew Purcell]

Helps a lot.

[DJ]

It helps a lot.

[Andrew Purcell]

It helps me with my sleep. Sleeping a lot.

[DJ]

I need. I need help with my sleep. Real talk, sleeping hurts now.

[Andrew Purcell]

What do you mean?

[DJ]

Like I just wake up and shit's just up. Dude, what is that?

[Andrew Purcell]

Oh, you don't even know. I don't want to hear that. I don't even want to hear that from you, man.

[DJ]

Bro, like my shoulder has been killing me.

[Andrew Purcell]

I don't even want to hear it.

[DJ]

Like, it sucks.

[Andrew Purcell]

I don't want.

[DJ]

I don't. I didn't know I could hurt myself from sleeping.

[Andrew Purcell]

Yeah. Give me another 15 years.

[DJ]

Yeah. Is there anything that could. I could do? Make it better?

[Andrew Purcell]

No, no, it's just.

[DJ]

Yeah, that's just.

[Andrew Purcell]

Yeah.

[DJ]

The cars I've been dealt.

[Andrew Purcell]

That's right.

[DJ]

Fuck, man.

[Andrew Purcell]

It's called age.

[DJ]

Is that what it is? Life is ageist. So now. Sweet, man. How you doing?

[Andrew Purcell]

You good?

[DJ]

Yeah. Got a busy weekend.

[Andrew Purcell]

Yeah. Yeah.

[DJ]

A lot of great things happening here.

[Andrew Purcell]

Yes, sir.

[DJ]

And we're here on. You guys are listening on a Monday to get better.

[Andrew Purcell]

Yeah. Before we get started, just to let you guys know, we are in Kutty again. A lot of you guys been asking about qt. We are. You will find form energy in QT along with the form ready drink, proteins, meat sticks, snacks. The full lineup back in qt. Just letting you guys know that important announcement.

[DJ]

That's great. Announcement.

[Andrew Purcell]

Yeah, it's great.

[DJ]

I do. I like. I like quick trip. Yeah, the taquitos.

[Andrew Purcell]

Yeah.

[DJ]

Yeah, bro. They got this new out there now. They got chicken tenders, dog.

[Andrew Purcell]

I don't want to hear about that either.

[DJ]

Andy, they slap. Okay.

[Andrew Purcell]

I know.

[DJ]

No sauce, dude.

[Andrew Purcell]

I know. Qt's like. Food is good, dude.

[DJ]

No, I've never had chicken tenders that didn't need sauce.

[Andrew Purcell]

Yeah, see, dude, I'm a regular person. I'm not. I have. I have regular people taste.

[DJ]

That's right. That's right.

[Andrew Purcell]

QT and Casey's pizza and that. That's what I love, dude. I love that, bro.

[DJ]

It's just. It's terrible.

[Andrew Purcell]

I gotta be careful. I gotta be careful because, dude, I'll gain £30 in a weekend, easy. Yeah.

[DJ]

Eas so light work.

[Andrew Purcell]

Yeah, man. But yeah, I do love it. To me, that's gourmet, bro.

[DJ]

Yeah, that's right. Hell yeah, man. Well, yeah, man. Guys, it's Monday, so as always, I got three good ones for you. All right. Let's make some people better today, guys. Andy, question number one. Andy, preference. This is leadership question. Andy, I'm 31 and I supervise about 15 people at work. Lately, I've been asking myself a question that I can't shake. If I worked for me, would I actually want to follow me. Not because I'm mean or unfair, but because I don't always live up to the standards I expect from other people. How do you become the kind of leader that other people naturally want to follow instead of someone who's just in charge?

[Andrew Purcell]

Well, I mean, first of all, the fact that you're aware of this is a really good sign because most terrible leaders, they believe they're great leaders. The worst leaders on the earth believe they're the best leaders on the earth. It's no different than when you go into a meeting and you know you need the team to perform and you say, hey, we're not doing good enough. We got to do this and this and this. The people who are already executing at a high level feel like you're talking to them, and then the people who aren't doing are like, oh, he's not talking to me.

[DJ]

Definitely not talking about me.

[Andrew Purcell]

So. So the fact that you're aware of your leadership weaknesses is a great sign. And you should always be auditing your ability to be an effective leader by examining your own leadership capability, style, techniques. So first thing I'll tell you is like, the fact that you're even considering or asking the question tells me that you have the capacity to be a great leader.

[DJ]

All right?

[Andrew Purcell]

Because most people don't do that. I think you're asking yourself a great question. Okay, if I was led by me, would I want to follow me? That's a great question to ask yourself

[DJ]

a deep one, dude.

[Andrew Purcell]

Yeah, for sure. And it's honest, it's a real thing. And if you can effectively answer that in a non biased way, you're going to develop as a great leader. Okay, but the question was how? How do I develop? How do I look? The greatest leaders in the world understand that leadership is not about authority. It's an equally as important position on the team to the mission at hand. Okay? So they don't look at it like, well, I'm the leader, so you got to do what I say. They look at it like, I'm the leader and that's a role and these guys have other roles and then those guys behind them have other roles. And if we're all rowing in synchronicity, we'll get where we want to go. So understanding that leadership is not a position of authority as much as it is a role on a team that has to be executed effectively to produce the outcome is the way that leaders should think about leading. Okay? Your job is to not know all the answers. Your job is to be able to understand what the right answer may be, even if it doesn't come from you. This is called servant leadership. All right? My job is to help them develop. It's to help us figure out the path, and it's for me to choose the path and then help them develop into the people that can effectively move us towards the path so that we all get the outcome that we're after. And people don't think of it like that. Bad leaders think of it as like, oh, well, I'm the leader. You got to listen to what I say. And they don't even really think about anything other than that. Like, that's not leadership, bro. You're just a douchebag. You know, so there's a lot of things that come into great leaders. You know, you need to be willing to do the things that you ask your team to do. You need to be able to do them effectively. Now, if you're a great, great leader, you're going to be surrounded by people who can do the job that you ask them to do much better than you could do it, but you should still be willing to do it, right? Even if you're bad at it, even if you're bad at it in front of the whole team, you should be willing to do that job, or at least do your best to do the

[DJ]

job,

[Andrew Purcell]

you know, living the standard that you ask from your team. You know, Vince Lombardi has a very famous quote that leading by example isn't the best way to lead. It's the only way to lead. And what that means is, is like, if you're not living the standard, if you're not willing to hold yourself accountable to the same standards that you hold the team, nobody's going to believe anything that you say, you know, and then there's other things, like, you can't lie to your team. You can't tell them you're going to do that you're not going to do. You can't say, hey, we're going to go do these things, and when we get here, this will happen, and then not follow through. And these are all things that create bad teams because the leader is ineffective. You know, I mean, dude, there's a million things. But at the end of the day, you know, leadership is not about authority. It's a. It's not about your ego. It's about accomplishing a mission. And if you could keep that intent and that understanding at the forefront of your focus, all of the other things tend to work themselves out. Okay? So instead of looking at yourself like, I'm the leader, I'm the man, I'm the boss, I'm the. This. You need to be looking at yourself Like, I am entrusted with this duty and obligation to get us where we need to go. And I may not always have the best ideas. Maybe my team can see something that I can't see. Like, if you're a general and you're not willing to listen to the guys on the front line, you're going to get people killed. Right. A lot of leaders won't do that. They think they know best. They think they know everything, you know, and really, dude, it's about squashing ego. It's about understanding that the mission comes first, the team comes first, and then you investing in the team and empowering the team to accomplish that mission, whatever that might be. So, you know, it's fundamentally different than what most people think. Most people get to a job, they get promoted, they get a little pay raise, and then it's the first time they ever had authority in any situation in their life. And they like to flex it. And that's not what being a great leader is about. Everybody hates that kind of leader. Like, you want to talk about a leader that your team run through walls. That's the guy who they know and trust is trying to get us to this destination, run through that wall with them. Yes. And that's the difference between good and effective leaders and people who suck. It's really just about how they view the role. You know, I don't view my role as a leader in any of my companies as a superior place to anybody else, even though technically, yes, it is a. In the hierarchy, it is an. A position of authority. But that's not how I look at it. I look at it like this. These people are betting their outcome on my ability to get us where we're trying to go. And I owe that to them to get us there. And that's how I look at it. And, and so I'm not saying, you know, I'm not even. Dude, like, leadership is also a lifelong skill. Like, I don't consider myself a great leader. I think once you start thinking you're a great leader, just like in any situation when you start to think it's you, then you get really bad at things, right? So, like, leadership is a lifelong journey. It's a lifelong learning process. You're gonna make mistakes, you're gonna up and. And dude, if you're a. If you're an ethical leader, you're going to learn from those mistakes because you don't want to make them again. Because, dude, when you are in a position of leadership and you make mistakes. The cost isn't just to you, it's to them. Right. You could cost them income, you could cost them opportunity, you could, you can waste their time. And you know, if you're an ethical leader, those are the things that are going to bother you.

[DJ]

Yeah, dude, you know what's funny? The. The leadership conversation. I grew up, I spent my most of my entire life thinking that leaders, you know, we're told there's natural born leaders. We're told that some people just have a natural inclination, which I think is still true. Right. For some people. Right. But I think the more I started looking at it, it's, it's truly an art form that, that takes investment. Right. And I think, and I want you to like, tell me what your thoughts on this. But I think for most leaders, when they get to that leadership position, they've invested in themselves, their education, their skills, they get the title, they stop investing in themselves. How, how did that work for you? As you guys started growing, you get more people in.

[Andrew Purcell]

I mean, bro, if you understand that, that you're never really a quote unquote great leader, the greatness will find you in it because you're always developing, you always want to get better. And a lot of people, they will wait to lead. There's so many people out there that have the capacity to be tremendous leaders, but they won't lead before they're given the title of leader. And that is not how it actually works. Leaders, great leaders are usually just the people who take initiative to lead. They're the people who say, okay, well this needs to get done. And they say, okay, let's do this, okay? And so they're the first guy that go. That's why it's called leading. You know, it's the first guy that goes. And if we're all standing around and you know there's a big pile of rocks and, and we got to put the rocks from over there to over there and all we got is shovels. The first guy that go gets the shovel and starts moving the rocks is going to be the guy that other people follow. Okay? And then a second guy joins in and then a third guy joins in and then there's three guys that won't join in. You're like, hey, you guys. Those guys fall off the team and everybody else just kind of goes. So like, you got to be willing to take the initiative to, to go first in order for anybody to follow you. And like that just make like it makes verbal sense, it makes logical sense. It's tactically correct. The. The taking initiative to just do the things that you observe need to be done is leading, and eventually people will follow you if you're willing to do that. And, yeah, like, you know, people are afraid to lead because they're like, oh, they're gonna make fun of me. It's like the kid in the class who asks the questions when you're in. Well, that kid ends up being, like, the smart motherfucker that makes money, right? And all the other kids that are making fun of them, they end up their. Their lives suck.

[DJ]

Following other leaders.

[Andrew Purcell]

Yeah, Right. So, like, you know, you got to be willing to look stupid. You got to be willing to go first. You got to be willing to understand it's not about you being a leader. It's about moving the rocks from there to there. And that's, like, the simplest way that you can look at it. You know, when you look at amazing, historic leadership figures over the course of time, they just identify what need to be done, and they started doing it, and other people joined in, right? And then you get to accelerated leadership. You know, you move up the chain a little bit, and you're like, okay, well, this. And you paint this picture. This is what we're going for. This is what needs to happen. And then you start, and other people follow in behind you. That's just how it works, man. So, like, this whole idea, you know, like, when you're on a team and you're not given the. The, like, so many people ruin their lives this way. They're on a team. They know what needs to be done, but they won't do it because they're afraid that if they do it, they're. They're going to make a mistake. Or they're afraid that, you know, other people won't follow them, or they'll look at it and be like, man, well, you know, Andy's the leader here. Why doesn't he see this or that? Well, that's your job, to go do that thing or show me that thing and take the initiative. And that's what actually, like, from an entrepreneur standpoint, which is most people, that's what drives your value within an organization. Someone who can look at something, observe it, handle it, and usually handle it without ever having to be told. And we always talk about the two things that are needed to be successful. Well, that's probably the third one, if we had a third one, right? We talk about being smart enough to not make the mistake more than once, and if you make it more than Once, don't make it three times, right? Being tough enough to go down the gauntlet without ever quitting. It doesn't matter how many times you get smashed in the face or kicked in nuts or demoralized or beat on, you get to up every single time. And then the third thing is, is if you can identify problems and you could solve problems without having to be told those three things together will produce success in your life, it doesn't matter if you're an entrepreneur or an entrepreneur. Those things will produce performance, and you will get compensated for that. So those are three character qualities that you have to invest in and develop. You know, are you smart enough to not make the same mistake twice? Are you tough enough to continue to move when it feels hopeless? And are you willing to take the initiative to solve the problems when you see the problems without having to be told to solve the problems and handle them? Those are the three things that create value inside of an organization or a team or whatever it is that you're. You're involved in. So it's really simple. It's just you have to invest in those things. And to your question, you know, if you, you know, people tease me a lot because they're, you know, they'll say things like, oh, man, congratulations. All the success. I'm like, dude, I'm just getting started. Okay, now, while I know that that might be a little bit of an exaggeration, like, I understand we've done some things, I will always say that because I don't want that voice to infect my mindset. I don't want taking that credit to infect my ability to be effective. You see what I'm saying? Get you comfortable. So I try to stay very humble with where I'm at, which keeps me hungry, which keeps me moving forward. And I try to make it the best I can about other people and not myself, you know, and, and sometimes we all fall victim to our own ego. And when you do, you got to be able to recognize it. You got to be able to be like, hey, man, I'm getting a little too, too high on my own supply there. You know what I'm saying? And. But that happens when you're winning, right? And, and, and so I think it's just important to always remember this isn't about you. It's not about having authority. It's not about you being the man. It's about what you accomplish and what you accomplish with your team and what you accomplish for your team and understanding that, like, when people bet on you you have an obligation to fucking run across that line and get them where they want to go, what they're betting on. And, you know, that ultimately comes down to a character and a person with ethics, someone who puts the team before themselves, who puts the goal before anything, and that's what ends those things all combined that we're talking about are what? That's the magic of leadership. It's not charisma, dude. There's plenty of leaders that, you know, quote unquote, they give a fiery speech and everybody's, oh, man, that guy's natural born leader. Well, how many times is he given that speech? How many. What would it look like the first time he gave the speech?

[DJ]

Right.

[Andrew Purcell]

Probably didn't look like that. Okay. That's actually an after effect of being a leader for so long, you understand? So people think that, like, oh, you gotta have this and you gotta have the words. No, the actions and the repetition create the words that allow you to deliver the right messages later. So, you know, I. I think a lot of people just have it backwards, dude.

[Unknown Rapper]

Yeah.

[DJ]

100, dude. Last piece. I want to hit on this real quick because I think this is important. When he talked about, you know, I don't always live up to the standards I expect from other people. And I remember we were walking. I know exactly where we were doing cardio one day, and it was just me and you talking about the same, like, topic almost. And I remember asking, I said, andy, like, you don't. You don't seem to have a problem holding people accountable. Right. And he was like, well, that's because I have no problem holding myself accountable.

[Andrew Purcell]

Yeah.

[DJ]

You know what I'm saying? So can we. Can we. Can we touch on it? Yeah, I think it's possible to. You can't do that if you're not holding yourself.

[Andrew Purcell]

Not in a real way.

[DJ]

Yeah.

[Andrew Purcell]

Not. I mean, you could boss people around and you can, like, threaten them and you. And by the way, I used to do that 15 years ago. Right. But if you really want people to follow you voluntarily, which is where the best teams, you know, the national championship teams, the super bowl teams, the biggest businesses, these people believe in the vision and they believe in that person. And if you want people to believe in you as a leader, you have to. Just like we talk about leading by example. The. The example isn't just the standard you live. It's. It's what happens when you don't live the standard. Right. Do you correct it in yourself? Do you take accountability? Can you look your team in the eye? And be like, man, we lost, and that was my fault.

[DJ]

Yeah.

[Andrew Purcell]

You see what I'm saying? Like, bro, there's a lot of times in business where we've lost because it was my fault. And I don't have a problem looking at my team and saying, hey, man, you know what, guys? I up. That was my bad. You guys did what the you were supposed to do. I up, and I won't make that mistake again. It's about being accountable to the team, and a lot of people won't do that because they think that it, like, dilutes when actually it builds. You know what I mean? They think it dilutes their leadership capital when in reality, that's what builds leadership capital.

[DJ]

Now you do it like a thousand times, it might dilute.

[Andrew Purcell]

Well, I mean. Yeah. Then, you know. Well, I mean, look, dude, but that goes into. The one, that goes into. You make the same mistake twice.

[DJ]

Right?

[Andrew Purcell]

You know, so, like, all of these things fit together like a puzzle.

[DJ]

Yeah. No, that's really.

[Andrew Purcell]

It's a lifelong journey, man. And. And the fact I don't. Did he say how old he was?

[DJ]

31.

[Andrew Purcell]

The fact that you're 31 and you're acknowledging that you have ways to go as a leader is a really good example that eventually you're going to be a great leader, you know? So, I mean, dude, look, I. One of the biggest things I. I like, people always ask, like, what regrets do you have? You know what my biggest regrets are, dude, is like, I look back at when I was a bad leader, and I realized that there was a lot of good people that I had that I was leading, that I failed as a leader, that at the time, I thought they failed. And that bothers me. I hate that.

[DJ]

Yeah.

[Andrew Purcell]

And it's something I live with because you can't go back and fix it. You can only fix it moving forward. But, like, great leaders, bro, they don't. You know, it's like Michael Jordan, you know, he doesn't talk about the championships he won. He thinks about the shots he missed. And great leaders, they don't focus on how great they're doing. They focus on the. That they up so they don't do it again. And, you know, a lot of people just. I think, dude, I think people just have it completely backwards.

[DJ]

Yeah. I love it, dude. I love it. That's real. Let's go. Let's go. Question number two, Andy. Guys, any question number two, Andy? I bought the company I've worked at for the last 12 years.

[Andrew Purcell]

That's cool.

[DJ]

It was yeah, it's pretty cool. It was exciting at first, but now I catch myself making decisions like an employee instead of an owner. I'm constantly worried about not losing what I've built instead of thinking about how to grow it. Was there a point where your mindset shifted from protecting the business to confidently growing and expanding it and what triggered that change?

[Andrew Purcell]

No, I didn't have that because I started the business. I started from zero. So I always had the mentality of growing from the very first day. You bought something that was already going. And you have a different perspective than I have. So you're going to have to shift to the understanding that anything but offense is losing. Okay? Anything but offense is losing in business, okay? You trying to protect your business is like going out and trying to play a football game with only the defense on the field. So you're relying on protecting, and then you're relying on the points coming from, you know, interceptions being run back for a touchdown, and any team that ever did that's going to lose. So you have to understand there is no maintaining, there is no protecting. The best way to protect what you have is to continue to grow it. Minute you get into that mindset of staying where you are and protecting what you have is the minute you start to lose. Because everybody else has the mentality of getting better, getting better, getting better, growing, growing, growing. And if you're trying to just stay where you are, then you're. You're moving backwards while they're moving forwards. You're not maintaining. They are. You're moving backwards because you're not innovating, you're not developing, you're not growing, you're not, you know, trying to be aggressive. And everybody else is. So like, they're, you're moving back while they're moving forward. And so, you know, that comes from the place of I purchased this business versus I started the business from scratch. When you start a business from scratch, you are always on offense. And that's how your mindset is wire. So you're. There was no, no, there was no pivot for me that said, oh, now I need to go on offense like that. I didn't have an option. Okay? But you need to realize as someone who's moving from an, an entrepreneur to an entrepreneur, that if you only play defense to protect what someone else is built, you're going to lose it anyway. So you have to be on offense. It's not a choice. Any business that stops innovating, that stops trying to grow, that stops trying to be better, eventually Gets swallowed up by the competition. That's reality. That is the life cycle of most businesses. Most businesses. And this is why second generation business owners are far less successful than first generation. A lot of people think it's because they're just gifted the business or whatever. And there's probably something to that. You know, they didn't learn how to work, they didn't learn how to, to build, you know, but the reality, they're spoiled. That's what people say. But the reality isn't that they're spoiled. The reality is, is they just do not understand what it took to build it. And you can't experience that unless you actually built it. So the second best thing you can do is pretend that you're at zero. Okay? You have a business at zero, no matter what it's doing right now. What are you going to do to get it to 100? What are you going to do to get it to 1000? That's where your mentality needs to be or you're going to get destroyed, dude. That's the reality.

[DJ]

Is this a comment like, like I've never heard of that being a thing. I mean, is this like a thing that, like. I guess, I guess it does happen out there. Like employees like buying the business. Have you seen that a lot?

[Andrew Purcell]

You mean it's terms of having this problem?

[DJ]

Yeah. Well, just, I mean, this scenario, this,

[Andrew Purcell]

this scenario usually presents itself when people inherit businesses.

[DJ]

Gotcha.

[Andrew Purcell]

Okay. But this guy did inherit business. He just paid money for it.

[DJ]

Got it.

[Andrew Purcell]

Okay, so you inherited, quote unquote, something that someone else built. So you don't understand what it took to go from zero to where you are. You just don't. All right? So it's a mentality problem. And the problem is, is that most of these people that get in this position because they know the business as what it has always been, they think that that was just magically materialized, not understanding what it actually took to get it to that point. And that is that, that's the delta that people have to overcome when they buy businesses. You have a lot of people on the Internet right now who are telling everybody to buy fucking businesses. Buy businesses. Buy businesses.

[Unknown Rapper]

Cool.

[Andrew Purcell]

You can buy all the businesses you want, but that mean you know how to fucking run them. That didn't mean you know how to grow them. And by the way, just so you know, unless you can afford to pay 6, 7, 800amillion bucks a year, you're not going to find an effective operator to work for you. You're gonna have to know how to do it. That's the reality. So that's a big problem I have with a lot of people who are saying, oh, just go buy all these businesses. What if you don't know how to run them?

[DJ]

That's right.

[Andrew Purcell]

You're just gonna. You're gonna amplify the speed at which you go broke. So you have to understand that the mentality of business is aggressive by default. If you're not aggressive and you're not pushing and you're not trying to win and you're not trying to expand, you are going to lose, period. There's no maintaining. There is no maintaining. There's not a business on this planet outside of very few exceptions. Like, they're like. I'll give you an example. There's a restaurant in New York City called Rouse. Okay? Everybody knows Rao's pasta Sauce.

[DJ]

Okay, okay.

[Andrew Purcell]

It's like 10 bucks. All right? The original Rouse in New York City, you cannot get into it is the hardest restaurant in the world to get into. You can't get into it. Do you know why you can't get into it? Because all the tables that are in there are owned by New York families, meaning that is a table that they actually own that they dictate who gets to sit at. So there is no way to get a reservation unless you know these people and they invite you in or they say, hey, you could have my table tonight. That reservation is every single night. Every single night they're open. So you can't get into it. All right? They never changed a menu. They never. That's been going on for decades. That's, like, the only example I can possibly think of of a company that has. And by the way, it's not even a real one, because then they innovated and moved outside of the realm of just the restaurant and used the restaurant to leverage for the demand of their CPG sauce.

[DJ]

Right?

[Andrew Purcell]

Okay, so that's not even a real example, but that's the closest one I could think of outside of things like that. There's not a business in this earth that continues to win over and over and over again that's still around, that doesn't evolve and improve and get better and take competition seriously. This is why I get so irritated with all these fucking idiots on the Internet who say it's not about competition. If you're an entrepreneur, it's absolutely about competition. Not only is it about competition, it's the hardest competition that you will ever be in because there is never a time to take a breath. This is why I say all the time, not everybody is wired for that kind of life. Not everybody wants to wake up every day sweating and knowing that if they take the day off, bro, that the competition is going to get another step closer to them. They don't want to do that, okay? They're not built for that. That's a different kind of pressure. It's a different kind of stress. For someone like this who's bought a business, you have to start thinking that you are at zero. You don't have shit. And by the way, you don't have shit because you didn't build it. You didn't build anything. You wrote a check for it. Good for you. That's cool. Now, you better get your mind right about what it's going to take to actually compete or you're going to get steamrolled. So playing defense and protecting what you have is always a failing strategy. It's always, always a failing strategy. Always.

[DJ]

Yeah. I love it, man. Guys, Andy, let's get to our third and final question. Question number three, Andy. I recently heard someone say that success usually doesn't happen because people aim too high and fail. It happens because they aim too low and succeed. That bothered me because I think there are a lot of people, myself included, who have quietly lowered their expectations over the years. So how do you know if you've become realistic or if you've just slowly talked yourself out of the life you actually wanted?

[Andrew Purcell]

Aren't they the same things? Aren't those the same exact thing? Why do you think I get so irritated with people who say realistic goals, realistic goals, realistic goals. No, it's not about realistic goals because the minute you hit it, you celebrate. You never stop celebrating. You end up losing by default. Okay? So you have to understand, for you to win long term, you have to have massive goals, because that's the nature of achievement. You get better, you get better, you get better, you get better, you get better, you get better chasing this massive goal. And eventually you become the kind of person that can repeat that process infinitely because you've been pursuing greatness in yourself and your abilities and your skill sets for so long. So this whole idea of setting realistic goals and then achieving them and that being the reason that people lose is a real thing. Most people severely underestimate what they're actually capable of. Whether it be because their parents told them or their teachers told them, or they've never observed someone actually being successful in their entire life. They never came from a place where they could, like, see someone from their neighborhood that did the thing. But I assure you, there are millions of people out there who have way, way, way more difficult circumstances than you, that have achieved far more than you are possibly even dreaming at this moment. So why the fuck not you? Okay? Most people think too small. That's their entire problem. They don't think outside what they've observed in real life. Right? They don't know a person, they don't know a neighbor, they don't know a cousin. They don't know anybody who's actually done this. So they make. Makes them think, oh, I can't do that either. Or they live in a household where their parents come home and they're like, you'll be lucky to do this. You know, you'll be lucky to get to here. You know, dude, that's for people that cheat and lie and steal and they tell them all this and fill their head with this to compensate for their own shortcomings, which ends up ruing. They're ruining their own kids, okay? And then you have moms who will tell you to be realistic because they don't want their kid to get hurt. Look, dude, if you want your kid to actually win, your kid's gonna get hurt. That's reality. That's how it works. So, yeah, I agree with this a hundred percent. Setting goals that are too small creates more losers than really anything else. And it comes from a place of people not truly believing that they are capable of doing something great. Which, bro, every single person that's ever done anything great, they breathe like you, they bleed like you, they feel pain like you. These are not superhuman individuals. These are people who, like we said originally, refuse to quit. They are consistently committed to improving and they're intelligent enough to not make the same mistakes twice. That's it. That's what they do. And yes, are there very smart people that are much smarter than you? Yeah. Okay. But that doesn't mean that you can't win too. Maybe you're not going to be Elon Musk and figure out how to catch a fucking rocket with chopsticks, okay? But that doesn't mean that you can't become tremendously more successful than anybody else that you've ever met. Okay? But it starts with that belief. You have to understand that all these people are just like you. They're exactly like you. Dude, they eat food, it upsets their stomach, they get sick.

[DJ]

Yeah.

[Andrew Purcell]

Okay? They get diarrhea, they. Their pants a little bit and they're like, I gotta change their underwear. Like, all this that happens to you happens to them. So, like, what the. You know what I'm saying? Why don't you believe in yourself enough to create greatness? Dude, there's so many examples, and we live in a time and age where so many people that are real are observable. If you know how to identify the difference between the real and the fake, that you should believe in yourself enough to know that you can accomplish literally anything. It is literally math. Okay? It is not magic. It's your win today, you win tomorrow, you win the next day, you win the day after that, you win the day after that. That all compounds just like a score would compound. How many days have you won versus how many days have you lost? It's a mathematical equation. And when you remove the magic from it and just accept it for what it is, it winning becomes really easy. And if you do it long enough, it becomes automatic. It's not something you strive to be. It's not something you aspire to be. It's who the you are when you've done it long enough. Like, when I start something new, dude, there at this point in my life, there's not a inch of doubt inside of me that we're going to win. Now, how long it takes to win or what it's going to be required to produce that outcome. That might be up for debate.

[DJ]

Plus or minus.

[Andrew Purcell]

Yeah. Like, you know, But I know that it can be done.

[DJ]

Yeah.

[Andrew Purcell]

And you. If you don't have that belief in yourself to start, then you shouldn't start. You just shouldn't. Because you're. You're. You're gonna get one or two steps down the road, you're gonna get punched in the face and you're gonna say, oh, man, everybody was right, you know? And that's why I talk about the dark side energy being so valuable, especially in the beginning years where you have a little bit of you in you. So that when you do stumble because you're gonna. And when you do make mistakes because you're gonna. And everybody's gonna laugh at you, and they will. You're able to be like, hey, you, man. I'm gonna show you what the fuck I'm capable of. And you continue to go. I do not know a single successful entrepreneur that does not have the you in their heart. They may pretend they don't. They may act like they don't. They. They may smile and be all positive all the time. But I can promise you, when you get them behind closed doors and you find out what really makes them tick, they got a whole lot of fuck you inside of them. And you got to have that. You got to be willing to look at people that laugh at you and be like, hey man, fuck you. Now you don't have to say it, but if you don't think it, you

[DJ]

shouldn't even go, yeah, bro, that limited belief is so crazy. What's that saying about like the best ideas or the most amount of best ideas or something like that are in the graveyard? In the graveyard, that's right.

[Andrew Purcell]

Because people lacked enough belief to understand that they are capable of creating greatness.

[DJ]

Yeah.

[Andrew Purcell]

Because of their environment that they, they've been surrounded by. Most of you guys are surrounded by losers, okay? That's the truth. Most people are surrounded by people who are losing. I'm not saying that to like make fun of people. I'm saying that as a factual statement. You are surrounded by people who, who have not done anything but lost. So why the fuck would they believe in you when you haven't given them a reason to believe that anything else is even possible? And that's where the obligation comes in. That's where like when we talk about this bigger picture mission of actually changing what's going on in this country and in the world comes from. Because if people don't see someone that they know, they continue to believe that losing is the only real option that they have. Okay? So it's up to you if you truly want to fix things and you actually want to make a difference and you actually want the country to be better, not just go online and talk about it and make content about it and talk. I mean, how many do we have that talk all this about America? And then you look at their lives and it's like, bro, you're not even living the standard that you want to see out here in the world, which is a age old saying from Gandhi, right? Be the change you wish to see. And so when you understand that your role and that ambition and that drive and that dream that has been placed in your heart by God is meant for you to achieve so that you could inspire other people to their own greatness, it changes the way you think. Okay? Now you understand it's not just about you. It's about everybody that's ever known you. It's about everybody that ever will known you. It's about your kids, it's about your neighbors, it's about your community. And when you become the that won or is winning that inspires them to do better. Okay? You may never see that. You may never have people come up to you and be like, hey, man, you really inspired me. But I promise you, that's how change works. And if we truly want to get away from these tyrants oppressing and taking our freedoms away, the only way to do it is through cultural change and personal excellence. And that starts with the individual. We will never fix this country. Never in a million years through just politics. It won't happen. It has to happen at the individual level. And that starts with people understanding that they have a duty and obligation to become what it is that they know they could be and should be and want to be. That little vision that lives inside of you that you're too afraid to tell anybody about because you're afraid to be laughed at. That's the mountain you're supposed to overcome while you're on this earth. That is what you're supposed to do. And if you don't do it, you failed your life. That's the truth. And you can listen to everybody and they can say, well, that's not what life's about. It's not all life's about. There's other things that life matters about, but that's a big part of it. It's like when people say, oh, well, money's not. Money's not important. Oh, it's not. I never heard somebody that had more money to say it was a problem.

[DJ]

That's right.

[Andrew Purcell]

That's right. You know what I'm saying? Like, the only people that say that are people with no money. So you got to realize, dude, if you're in a situation where you're surrounded by people, what's all they've done is lost. Why the are they going to believe in you? Your job is to show them what winning looks like so that they will stop believing that and start to question their own reality and become better themselves. That's what cultural change is all about, man.

[DJ]

Oh, brother. That was three?

[Andrew Purcell]

Yep. All right, dude, let's get out there. Let's kick some ass. See you guys this week. Don't be a hoe share the show

[Unknown Rapper]

went from sleeping on the floor now my jury box froze up Bow a stove counted millions in a cold bad booty swole got her own bank roll can't fold just a no head shot case closed.