On today’s episode, Andy answers live call-in questions on how to set boundaries with other driven people, what are some good ways to let go of guilt from your past, and how to build patience as you push for success.
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Andy Purcell
Yeah Went from sleeping on the floor.
Unknown Co-host
Now my jury box froze up Pole stove counted millions in a cold bad booty swole Got her own bank roll can't fold Just a no head shot case close. What is up, guys? It's Andy Purcell and this is the show for the realists. Say goodbye to the lies, the fakeness and delusions of modern society. Welcome to reality, guys. Today we have Q&AF. That's where you submit the questions. We give you the answers. Now, you could submit your questions a few different ways. The first way is, guys, email these.
Andy Purcell
Questions into ask andy@andy4seller.com or you go.
Unknown Co-host
On YouTube on the Q&A F episodes. There's a link there that you click on. Submit your question there and you can call in live on the show and ask your question. All right. Throughout the week, if this is your first time listening, we're gonna have shows within the show. We're gonna have cruise the Internet. We call it cti. That's where we put topics up on the screen here. We talk about what's going on in the world. We speculate and then we talk about how we the people have to solve these problems going on in the world. Other times we're going to have real talk. Real talk is just five to 20 minutes of me giving you some real talk. And then we have 75 hard verses. Occasionally, that's where someone who has completed the 75 hard program comes on the show. They talk about how their life was before, how their life is now, and how they used to the 75 hard program to get their shit together. If you're unfamiliar with 75 hard, it is the initial phase of the lif hard program. Okay, which is available for free at episode two zero eight on the audio feed. It's not on YouTube. It's only audio. We weren't on YouTube when that came out. All right, so if you're unfamiliar with Live Heart is the world's most famous mental transformation program. And it is free again, episode 208 on the audio feed. There's a book on my website called the Book on Mental Toughness. That website is andyforcella.com it's not necessary. You don't have to buy it, but it's got the entire program plus a whole bunch of other chapters on mental toughness, why it's important, how to cultivate it and how to use it in your life. All right, with that being said, we don't run ads on the show. We ask very simply that you help us grow the show. By sharing it. All right, so if the show makes you think, if it makes you laugh, it gives you a new perspective. If it's something you think is worth sharing, don't be a hoe.
Andy Purcell
Share the show.
Unknown Co-host
All right. What's up?
Andy Purcell
Greetings. Salutations.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah.
Andy Purcell
How's it going?
Unknown Co-host
Good.
Andy Purcell
Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're Fourth of July guy coming out. This show's released on Monday, so. So, I mean, we'll. Laughter. But it's one of my favorite holidays.
Unknown Co-host
Is it?
Andy Purcell
Yeah, it is. Like. Is it what's like, your holiday rank?
Unknown Co-host
I don't know, mang. For me, they're all the same me. Yeah.
Andy Purcell
You missed an opportunity there.
Unknown Co-host
What? Kwanzaa? No, what was I supposed to say? Kwanzaa. What was I supposed to say?
Andy Purcell
No, I said. I said mine used to be Thanksgiving.
Unknown Co-host
Oh.
Andy Purcell
You know, I tried to tee you up there, but Kwanzaa was equally impressive. That was good. Oh, that was good, man. Yeah.
Unknown Co-host
Well, I don't want to leave you out. You know what I'm saying?
Andy Purcell
Yeah, no, it's fine. Yeah, it's fine. Did you know. Did you know, fun fact about 4th of July. Did you know that the Declaration of Independence wasn't actually signed on the 4th of July?
Unknown Co-host
When was it signed?
Andy Purcell
I don't know, but it was not on it. It was approved on 4th of July, but was signed like, I think a day later or something like that. Yeah, fun fact.
Unknown Co-host
Cool. Cool. They teach you that in Kwanzaa class?
Andy Purcell
Yeah, yeah, it's right. It's right after the chapter on America.
Unknown Co-host
That's right.
Andy Purcell
Yeah. How to read that chapter. Yeah, no, it's. It's Q and A, though, man. It is. This is one of my favorite episodes.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, me too.
Andy Purcell
It's awesome. Get to hear some.
Unknown Co-host
I think we should just switch and say no more CTIs and only calling Q and A's.
Andy Purcell
You try to piss some people off.
Unknown Co-host
I actually think we should do two of these a week.
Andy Purcell
Two Q and A's?
Unknown Co-host
Yeah. Yeah, that's what I think. I think it's a totally different audience. Well, I know it is, and I think the show would be much more valuable if we did two and not just one. I was going to talk to you guys about it later, but since we're talking about it.
Andy Purcell
Yeah, it's out in the open. Yeah.
Unknown Co-host
All right. I don't know how that would work.
Andy Purcell
Yeah, the same.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, like, how would we record that with the schedule?
Andy Purcell
Yeah.
Unknown Co-host
Man, if only I was a professional podcaster and not just a idiot with a microphone.
Andy Purcell
We do this every day.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, that's right. All day long, man. You know, I could get one of those microphones like all these dudes get, and just stick it in my face and record 700 videos in a row and, you know, I could produce content all day long. Yeah. Read quotes and then interpret them. You know, like, let's do that. We'll just read all these quotes and then we'll interpret them. And, you know, we won't talk about any actual lived experience. We'll just talk hypotheticals, you know, what's this mean to you? What's your truth? You know, Truth. Yeah. Yeah. I could move up from, you know, 20. Rank of 22.
Andy Purcell
That's actually globally. That is impressive.
Unknown Co-host
No, it's not. We. I was number one with MF CEO for a long time, bro. Overall. Overall. Yeah.
Andy Purcell
Okay.
Unknown Co-host
I mean, we were up there, dude.
Andy Purcell
We got some work to do.
Unknown Co-host
Well, you know what it is, dude, is like the podcasting has. You know, back then there was not nearly as many podcasts, and now there's just a ton. And now big business has gotten involved into podcast, so there's these big networks that run massive amounts of advertising. That's why sharing the show is so important, you know, for us. We don't take corporate sponsors. We're not signed up with some network. Is an independent show that we finance ourselves, and we hang in there with, you know, the people who are spending millions and millions and millions of dollars to promote the show. So, you know, it's. It's cool and it's. It's really good. I know. We're the only organic show that's ranked that high, for sure. And probably the only unaffiliated show that doesn't. Isn't on a network besides Rogan. I think Rogan doesn't. Oh, no, he's with Spotify. Yeah, but I mean, let's. Let's be real. Rogan's fucking Rogan.
Andy Purcell
Yeah.
Unknown Co-host
It's a different level.
Andy Purcell
4.42 million podcasts.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah.
Andy Purcell
That's crazy. Yeah, that's crazy.
Unknown Co-host
Yep.
Andy Purcell
That is crazy. Yeah. Well, sweet, man. Let's get into it. Let's make some people better today.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah.
Andy Purcell
Let's start off with. Start off with the call in. Let's get our home, homie. Kristen, Kristen, Kristen on the phone. Let's give her a call.
Kristen
Hello, this is Kristen.
Andy Purcell
Hey, Kristen. Greetings. Salutation. How are you?
Kristen
I'm good. How are you doing today?
Unknown Co-host
We are calling from India. You owe us money. You owe us whatever.
Kristen
Whatever.
Unknown Co-host
Andy, Hi.
Kristen
Good morning. It's Nice to talk to you.
Unknown Co-host
Your rich uncle passed away and he left you a billion dollars.
Andy Purcell
I just need two Walmart gift cards.
Kristen
All I have to do is give you all of my account information and you'll make sure that that hits. Yeah. Yeah. I've been listening to you guys too long to do that. Stupid. So thank you, guys.
Andy Purcell
So what's going on, Kristen?
Kristen
Guys, Man, I really appreciate the call. I'm so excited about this. This is fantastic. So I've been. I'm a big fan. Thank you guys for everything that you do. My boyfriend is actually the one who paid the fee and turned me on to y', all, so we can all thank him for all of the. The gross personally and professionally that I've done listening to you guys and thanking you. But I think kind of where I'm at right now is I'm wanting to keep. Keep achieving and keep succeeding, you know, in myself, in my career, and in my relationship. But at what point I think, can I start to take more ownership of that and set the boundaries in place so that I'm basically just telling the world, no, get on my scheduler. Get the out of my face. I really don't have time your. And I just need. I know what I need to do, so. But I also am trying to do this with a partner, and I want.
Christian
Him to get his to meet his.
Kristen
Goals, and I want to support him in that. And I do think that we have a good thing going and that we are both very supportive of each other, but there's still these kind of growing pains and learning curves where I don't want to keep him from achieving his goals, but I got to go to sleep. So if you're going to the gym at 11pm I'm not going with you because I already did my workout this morning, you know, so.
Andy Purcell
Setting boundaries for yourself to other people.
Kristen
Yeah, like, setting the boundary. I want to support you and your goals. You're supporting me and mine. Like, at some point, something's gotta give. And I'm not always gonna go to the gym with you because I. Because we're on different schedules now because I did my. You have your other to do.
Christian
And now here we are.
Unknown Co-host
Is this a current point of contention where you guys are, like, disagreeing here or.
Kristen
It has been. It absolutely has been. I, I, I've done the sleep deprivation, saying I've got small kids. I got to go to bed to be my best self. So it has been. I think when I first sent this question in, it was after a recent A recent fight about this very topic. And that's kind of, kind of what led to it.
Unknown Co-host
Well, I mean, you know, that's a hard question for me to answer because the answer is so obvious. You say, hey, I'm fucking tired. I'm not going to the fucking gym at 11 and see you later. Like, what? Yeah, what, what does, I mean, you know, if you guys are in a good relationship, that should be automatic and it should be understood like, hey, we both have a role to play. This is my role, this is what I'm working on. This is your role, this is what you're working on. I mean, if that's a problem, you know, try waking him up at 3 o' clock in the morning a few times and see how he likes it. So yeah, you know, I, I don't, that these are very fundamental, automatic things that should be pretty easy to overcome. Because dude, if you have a problem and I'm just going to be real, that's why you called. If you have a problem setting boundaries about like this, you're going to have big problems achieving big goals. Because yeah, this is a very simple, a very simple boundary setting exercise that to, to me, and I realize that, you know, to you it may be different, but to me that's just super basic. And if we can't have a direct conversation with the person that we live with, you know, that's going to be a problem because as you go, as you go down the road of building anything, it's going to get harder and harder and harder and there's going to be periods of time where there is no time. And that has to be understood for a relationship to survive that kind of growth. And you know, sometimes they don't survive and sometimes people aren't aligned and sometimes you don't find out that you're not aligned until later. You know, everybody wants the big prize. Everybody wants to be proud of what they're doing, everybody wants to say they want it. You know, the aesthetic of hunger is very appealing, but nobody wants to starve, you know what I'm saying? And like, dude, when you're talking about building, it's starving and it's hard and it takes massive amounts of sacrifice of time. And you know, that has to be understood by both parties or it's going to be a constant, you know, problem. And dude, I could tell you, you know, I've been in a number of relationships over the last 26 years and every time I was in a relationship where it wasn't complimentary, I made zero Progress in my business and my goals because a lot of my attention was put towards appeasing the other person and, you know, not getting what I needed to get done done. And the reality of that looks we.
Kristen
Don'T want to do that to each other, right?
Unknown Co-host
What's that?
Kristen
I said we don't want to. We don't want to do that to each other. It's like we both know that we want to support each other towards reaching our goals.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, but.
Kristen
But sometimes we do that via different routine.
Christian
But what I'm telling you saying, hey.
Unknown Co-host
What I'm telling you is, is it sounds good until it's fucking real. And everybody says they want to support, everybody says they want, you know, to, to help. But when it gets real and there's not enough time and you know, there's priorities that have to be taken care of, that's where you find out, really, if people are actually about it. So I think you guys need to have some real conversations about what that actually means. Because as you grow and as you progress, these things are going to get more difficult. And if they're already difficult, you know, there needs to be a realignment at a minimum. Does that make sense?
Kristen
It does make sense and I hear that, and I do think that it is about kind of aligning the routines about it because I don't want to be this person that's holding him back either.
Unknown Co-host
No, I mean, look, man, it's. Right, it's. First of all, let me be real, dude. I don't know anybody who has built anything relevant by themselves. Meaning, yeah, anybody who's built anything, they either built it while they were with a supportive partner and then maybe separated, but I don't know anybody who built it when they were single. Because, dude, the amount of work and the amount of effort and the amount of, of just straight up ass beating that you're gonna take it. You have to have someone there that can help you with things. And I don't know anybody who is what I would consider massively successful who didn't have a supportive partner even if they were single. So, you know, that's my honest experience. I can't name one person I know who's built anything real that wasn't with a partner that was supportive. I know a lot of guys who maybe they built something and then got divorced and now they're single. I know a lot of guys, you know, who were single in the beginning, got married, had a supportive partner, then, you know, broke up and lost their. But like, there's just a Lot of things that people don't consider. And I actually believe that the dynamic between men and women, especially in building a life, I think is very skewed in the way culture and society presents it. Because I personally believe that it takes both people. And so I think, you know, this whole identity of, you know, I could do things on my own. I, you know, maybe I don't know anybody who has, you know what I'm saying? Not anything real. So I think it's just conversations. I think it's getting aligned, having some conversations and, you know, being real about what it's going to take. You know what I mean? Like, there's going to be times where it's going to be really fucking hard. And you know what? When those times get really fucking hard, I don't want to hear you fucking cry about it. I don't. You know what I'm saying? Like, not you, but your partner, you know. So.
Kristen
Yeah.
Unknown Co-host
What do you think?
Kristen
Well, I'm just that I don't. So I'm like, you know, the female in this relationship. Right. But I don't want to be the one who's back burnering my goals and my needs either.
Unknown Co-host
Well, what are your goals?
Kristen
Five things I'm trying to achieve. Well, I'm trying to like make a high salary and reach that and have investment opportunities through those goals. And I'm on my way. I'm making a lot of progress, but I don't want to do it by myself either. But I don't want, I don't. It's like I want to be able to find this balance and I guess that that isn't setting boundaries. And so we're both able to work towards our independent goals, but doing that together so that we can have a together goal. Yeah, but I don't, I have my needs that need to be met and I don't. And some of that is through the, like our actual relationship.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah.
Kristen
And I don't want to be the one because I'm, I'm. I am divorced, so I don't want to go down that road again.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, he needs, he has needs too. So it's not just one sided.
Kristen
Yeah, absolutely.
Unknown Co-host
Listen, lots of people do what you're trying to do. It happens every day. I don't think this is overly complicated. It's just about having some honest communication and keeping communication open without being emotional about it.
Kristen
Right.
Unknown Co-host
You know, it's. I, I don't, I don't think anything that you're trying to do is, is so abnormal that it it, it, it's. I mean, this is the way millions of people operate. And by the way, sure, this is something for everybody else too. Not, not just you. This relationship dynamic that you are sold as normal is not that normal. Okay? The perfectly happy married couple with the white picket fence that we're all told represents what life is supposed to be. How many motherfuckers do you know actually have that? Because I don't know many, all right? And I certainly don't know many that have a big life. Meaning they've built a lot of things. They make a lot of money. They have the freedom to go spend money and do vacation. None of those people have this traditional life. And we all, and this is all of us spend our time judging our lives against this ideal that nobody fucking has. Nobody has it. So when you think of, like, what you're trying to build, understand that you are free to design that any way that works for you and what you're trying to accomplish, and none of the ways that you can design are wrong. There's all kinds of ways to live a relationship. And just because in the movies they make it seem this way doesn't mean that if we're not that way that there's something wrong with what we do, you know? So be careful of that too, because a lot of people live against a standard that is very imaginary in my opinion. I just don't know many people that live that.
Andy Purcell
Yeah. In theory or application.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah. I mean, do you?
Andy Purcell
No, I don't. I don't.
Unknown Co-host
And dude, sometimes the happiest people have completely non traditional relationships. You know, they, they understand, like, hey, this is what works for us. Like, bro, I know a dude who's married who lives in a completely different house than his wife. They're happy as.
Andy Purcell
Yeah.
Unknown Co-host
You know, and everybody looks at him. They're like, what's wrong with you?
Andy Purcell
That's, that's wrong.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah. Right. Well, dude, it works for them, so who gives a. Yeah.
Andy Purcell
You know, so gotta find what works for you.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah. You know what it does? It keeps them dating.
Andy Purcell
Pick you up at nine. Yeah, that's actually, that's actually kind of cute.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah. But not only that, you know, you're not, you're not. There's, there's, there's mystery there. They're like, bro, it's kind of hard to have mystery when you're taking a. In front of your wife for 20 years. You know what I'm saying? Like, they're that dude, for real. So, like, people dog the dude. But the reality is he's got a healthy relationship. You see what I'm saying?
Andy Purcell
100.
Unknown Co-host
So we got to be careful not to judge everybody just because it looks different. And I guess what I'm saying to you, Kristen, is get, like. Get that in your mind, you know? Like, dude, there's. There's no right or wrong way here. It's. It's about being effective towards what you're trying to do, and that's just gonna require communication. It sounds like you're with a good dude. You know, he did. He did. He did put you onto the show.
Andy Purcell
That's what I'm saying.
Unknown Co-host
Let's be all right.
Kristen
That's true.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah. It sounds like, you know, you. It's. Honestly, it sounds like you just want confirmation. And. And the truth of the matter is, is, yeah, dude, there's no right or wrong way to do this. Just communicate openly. And it sounds like he's driven and he's. He wants to do his thing. And you guys will figure it out, man. Lots of people do. Lots and lots of people do. And I. I would say. I just want to say this again. The happiest people I know do their own thing, and they don't measure against what everybody else is doing.
Andy Purcell
Love it.
Kristen
Yeah.
Andy Purcell
Love it.
Kristen
I like that.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah.
Andy Purcell
Sweet. Well, thanks for. Thank you for taking the call.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, you're welcome. Yeah.
Kristen
I don't know if you can hear him. I gave my other earbuds, too. Super excited. Big fan. Thank you, guys. Keep doing what you're doing. We appreciate it.
Unknown Co-host
All right. See you, guys. Yeah, man. I think a lot of people do that, bro.
Andy Purcell
Yeah.
Unknown Co-host
Like, a lot of people measure their lives and their success and where they are not against necessarily other people, but against this ideal that they believe is what everybody else has when really, dude, nobody has it and they've never seen it, bro. I don't know anybody that has it.
Andy Purcell
No.
Unknown Co-host
You know, you got all these rules in society, bro. You're supposed to be married by the time you're 30 or 25. You're supposed to have kids. You got to do it like this. You got to do it like that. You got to do it, bro. There. That's total bullshit. You get to do whatever the fuck you want to do. Like, reality, you know?
Andy Purcell
Like, you know what I was thinking of, too? It's like. It's like, you know, you see, like, those old movies were like the. The old married couple, they don't even sleep in the same bed, or they had, like, the two twin beds next to you. I'm like, man, that's fucking weird. But again, like, it works. My grandparents asleep in the same bed.
Unknown Co-host
Bro, there was a lot of rules from the old ways that actually made for better long term relationships, you know what I'm saying?
Andy Purcell
I love the point too, though. Like, you know, when you just like. Because again, this is an entrepreneur show, but just trying to build anything, you got to have some type of support there with you. Like, it's important.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, bro, listen, I think the, the male female dynamic is so up in, in the way that it's presented in the world. You know, we have all these dudes screaming about how I don't need, I don't need. I'm, you know, I got 10 hoes and. Yeah, that sounds kind of cool, right? Like when you're 20. I just, I think there's. I think we try to put so much pressure to do things a certain way when in reality, dude, that there is no certain way, you know, and then when we don't. When we don't go that way, you know, we judge ourselves harshly, you know, and. And what I was saying about the male female dynamic, I got off the track there for a second, you know, and we got women, because of the, the feminism movement, you know, saying, I don't need no man, and men are saying, I don't need no woman. And then both of them are miserable.
Andy Purcell
Yep. Because they're both lying.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, both, dude, they are both lying and they're both trying to posture and bro, you. You know, it's. The truth of the matter is, is I personally think that's another weaponization of culture against people. Because the reality, to build something great takes. It takes a partnership, dude.
Andy Purcell
Yeah, that's real, man. That's real. Let's keep moving. I got another question for you. Question number two, guys. What's up?
Unknown Co-host
What's up?
Andy Purcell
Andy? I'm about to turn 40 in a few weeks, and it's causing me to have some really deep reflection. I've done things I'm not proud of. I've hurt people, wasted time, broke promises to myself. Even though I've grown since then, I still carry some shame of those versions of me. I know holding on to guilt isn't helping, but it feels like I deserve to be reminded. How do I give myself grace without letting myself off the hook? I guess, is what I'm asking.
Unknown Co-host
Well, I mean, you and everybody else, you think everybody else hasn't had those same regrets? You think everybody else hasn't done that they wish they hadn't? You think everybody else See, you just don't see everybody else's. This goes back to what we were just talking about. Every single person you know, bro, has these same feelings. Every single person looks back on their life and says, I should have done that different, or, I was mean there. I didn't treat that person right. And they feel bad about it. Every single person out there looks back and they analyze their life because, dude, hindsight is 20 20. You could clearly see the moves looking backwards. And they say, I wasted time here. I shouldn't have done that. Or I shouldn't have done this. And there's two parts to this one. Yeah. That's called life, dude. The only perfect person that's ever existed in the history of humankind is named Jesus Christ. Is that your name? Are you Jesus?
Andy Purcell
Jesus don't count.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, Jesus don't count, bro. You're supposed to sin. You're supposed to up. That's the whole point. The better question for you to be learning or to. For you to ask yourself is, what'd you learn? And the fact that you feel shame and the fact that you feel guilty tells me that you probably learned quite a bit, which is a great thing. Okay, so how do you apply those lessons to the next 40 years? And you keep moving. And then finally, I would say this. How would you treat your friend? If I was your friend and I came to you or the guy's name? What? Do you have a name? Steve. Whatever. I came to you. I say, hey, Steve, listen, man.
Andy Purcell
I.
Unknown Co-host
Feel really guilty about some things I did 10 years ago, and I carry a lot of shame. Well, what are those, Andy? Well, you know, I could have done this, and, you know, I was mean to this person and this and that. You're gonna look at me and be like, yeah, the exact same thing I'm telling you.
Andy Purcell
That was ten years ago.
Unknown Co-host
Yes.
Andy Purcell
Yeah, yeah.
Unknown Co-host
Like, bro, there is an expiration date to your negative deeds, and you have to understand that. And for you to say, not let myself off the hook. The. The way you not let yourself off the hook is by changing your behavior moving forward. Okay, so what would you tell that friend? I would tell that friend, hey, guess what, Steve? Everybody has the same feelings you have. Everybody's made mistakes. Everybody has skeletons in their closet. You just aren't privy to seeing those. So you assume that you're the only one that feels that way when literally every motherfucker out there feels that way in some way, shape or form. Some more than others. Okay? And yes, there are some people. 30% of people have no inner dialogue. Those people probably never reflect on anything and they go through life. But here's the problem. They never develop either. They never grow, they never change, they never progress. And you have the opportunity to. By just acknowledging, like, yeah, that's not the person I am anymore, and I don't do those things and. And change the behavior. And that's how you. That's how you do it, you know? Like, you. Would you forgive your friend for. For hat. For doing things like that? I would. I would say, hey, bro, don't do that anymore. It's all good. You know? And that's how you should talk to yourself.
Andy Purcell
Yeah. Is this something about. Because I feel like a lot of people, once they get up into that age, like, that's when the. They want to start reflecting.
Unknown Co-host
Well, yeah, because you have enough life to reflect on, you know, like when you're 20, when you're 30, bro, you're looking ahead. You're like, I'm still young. I have all this time, you know, Even though I know a lot of people get 30, and they're like, oh, dude, I'm so old. That's not real, bro. When you turn 40 and you're in your mid-40s, you start to realize, well, this is probably close to at least half my life. How have I lived it? And it's a different thing. A lot of people call it a midlife crisis. It's just a midlife assessment of how you're doing. And I don't know anybody who. Who hasn't become. I don't know anybody of quality who hasn't gone through that. That's normal. You're gonna go through periods of reflection in your life many times. And I think what makes the one when you're about 40 or, you know, mid-40s more powerful is because you actually can do the math. You're like, well, if I'm double my age, I'm 80, so this is kind of probably half my life. How'd I do? Right? And it's heavy because you're like, fuck, dude. You know, Because I think everybody has this internal thing where they're like, man, you know, once I get this age, I'll. I'll improve. I'll get better. I'll become the person I want to be. And, you know, and then when they don't, they're like, fuck, I'm not even that person yet. You know, and it becomes a real thing. So you got to stop telling yourself the story. And you gotta stop. You gotta start living how, you know, you should live now.
Andy Purcell
How do you balance that? You know, because you also say too, like, bro, like, you're one of your biggest critics.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, absolutely.
Andy Purcell
And so, like, how do you. I guess, how do you work through that of, like, making sure that you're not, you know, taking it too easy on yourself?
Unknown Co-host
Well, look, listen, I'm. I'm probably the wrong person to ask that to because, like, I'm extreme. I am extremely hard on myself. Anybody who's close to me knows that, like, to the point where it's, like, probably not good for me mentally, but it also is the reason why I am who I am. So I have to look at my life and say, am I happy with the result that I've produced so far? The answer is yes. How did I get here? Why did I get here? What made me get here? One of those things was being very critical and aware of myself. But what I have learned is that you can just adjust that way of living to be your baseline standard. And you don't have to be that critical. You don't have to be angry. You don't have to tell yourself you're a piece of. You know.
Andy Purcell
But doesn't that get harder, though, when you have more proof in the pudding, if you will? Right? Like, now you're doing stuff. You have less people doubting you. You know what I'm saying? So, like, how do you. I guess, like, how do you work that when you're not, like, people believe, like, they know. Okay, yeah, you're doing some. You've done some, right? Like, and so, like, how do you, I guess, just keep yourself in check, I guess, in that they're like, no, I still got some to do.
Unknown Co-host
You guys set bigger goals. Your goals got to be like, the goals I have. The amount of progress I've made in my life from where I started to where I am now is not even close to the amount of progress I actually want to make. So when I look at how do I stay hungry, driven, you know, sharp, which I think is what you're asking. My goals are so big that I still feel behind from where I'm at. And I think where people get really messed up is they get to a certain point where they're comfortable, and then they start saying, I've got it made. I can relax. They abandon all the habits that got them to where they are, and then they end up losing because they. You are in a competition, okay? And there's other people playing the game. And a lot of people will say, well, now it's not A competition? No, that is. It absolutely is. If you're in business, it's totally competitive. And the minute you get complacent, you're going to get beat. And so I think the way to trick yourself into not being complacent is to continue to expand your goals to something that will take your whole life to achieve, you know, and then they will say, well, well, then you'll never achieve it. That's right. Because the achieving is not the point. It's the person you become along the way. And it's the process and the standard that you live in line with. And a lot of people don't get that. You know, A lot of people will say, well, I'm just in it for the money. You'll fucking lose, bro. You'll lose because you're competing as people like me that love the fucking war, bro. Like, I love it. Every day I wake up, I'm like, I might be like, fuck, this sucks, but the minute I get out there, I'm fucking trying to kill you. And you know, it's. You either are for it or you're not for it. I can tell you this, every single badass entrepreneur I've ever met, they're straight killers, dude. Like, they do not give a about feeling tired. They don't complain. They don't. And the minute someone else bitches about being tired, they get excited because they're like, I got this smell blood. Yeah, bro. And like, dude, this is the problem with the Internet. The Internet has created this fucking thing where everybody thinks they're an entrepreneur. And like, the truth of the matter is most people just are not wired for it, dude. They're not. And you will have all these coaches out there say, oh, that's bullshit. They're wired for. No, they're doing that to take your fucking money, okay? If you can't show up day in and day out hungry to win on your own without having to be fucking motivated or excited or you won't make it long term, dude. You just won't make it. You gotta have the fire inside of you and that's it. I. I don't know how to explain this to you. I try to explain it to them, but, you know, the statistics back it too, bro. You know, 8% of the people are entrepreneurs now. It's like closer to 10 because of the Internet. But, like, how many of those people stay in the same thing as an entrepreneur for more than 12 months, right? Entrepreneurship is not, you know, running a fucking, you know, coaching scheme. That's not Entrepreneurship, bro, That's easy money that people make by pretending to be something they aren't. You know, we're talking about actually building a product that benefits people that has long term potential. There's not many people that can do that, dude. And there's not many people that can do it for years and years and years and, and by the way, there's not many people that want to do it for years and years and years. It's fucking hard, bro. But there is a segment of people who love that it's that hard and they're fucking insane. I, I don't know what I tell you about my. When you, when I text you, I'm insane. You literally said that I'm insane, bro. Like, and every other motherfucker that I know that operates at a high level, they're insane too. They might, they might hide it better than me. They might like, they might like be really proper, you know? But I promise you, when you get a couple drinks in him and you sit down at the table in my, in my cigar lounge, the do they say the same, bro? They're insane. So are you insane? Probably not. Can you make some money? Yes. Do you have a good grasp of how hard it's going to be? I don't think so. And so that's why I try to tell people the truth, bro, because like, there's so many people out here telling all these people the wrong. That it's going to be easy. And you just got to do this and that and this and you know, it's. You could just be an entrepreneur and kick your feet up and all this. And dude, what happens is, is that people try and then they fail. And then they think, well, how come everybody else is doing this so easily? And then they think it's them when in reality they've been lied to. This is the same thing in the weight loss industry, okay? In the weight loss industry, there's all these products that have come around for years and years and years and years and years that say, take this and you'll get in shape, okay? Every knows that that's not true. Everyone, all right? But they buy the anyway because they're looking for a workaround, they're looking for a hack. They hope that maybe this is the one thing. And these companies know that, okay? So they know that if they promise someone easy results, they will get the money and that the person will actually blame themselves for their lack of results, okay? They're not going to blame the product because they already knew the product wasn't going to work. And they also knew that they ate like while they were taking the product. When in reality, bro, it's just hard, man. It's boring, it's monotonous. It's. It's the hardest thing you could ever do for work and it's not for everybody. So I, you know, it frustrates me because I see a lot of really good people who are really good at what they do fail at being an entrepreneur, when in reality they should have never been one in the first place. Yeah. If you don't have a high tolerance for pain, bro, and you don't have now, you can build that.
Andy Purcell
Yeah.
Unknown Co-host
Okay. That's the point of living the live hard and 75 hard lifestyle. But if you don't have a high tolerance for. For literal pain and frustration and you can't be fueled by anger and hate, you're not going to make it. Dude. I'm sorry. You're. You're not. You're not.
Andy Purcell
I love it.
Unknown Co-host
Because that's all you get.
Andy Purcell
Yeah.
Unknown Co-host
All you get is resistance from every direction. All you get endless supply. Yes. That's all you get. You get told you're stupid. You get told you're going to lose. You get told you're unrealistic, you get told you're materialistic. You get told that your priorities are up, you're greedy, you forgot where you came from, you're not humble. Etc, Etc. It goes on and on and on. The list never stops. And then on top of it, you're going to get hit with, okay, you're going to have people steal from you. You're going to have people scam you. You're gonna have problems with, you know, regulations and, and taxes and people sabotaging your business from the inside. You're gonna have your competitors do up, bro. It never ends. It never fucking ends. And if you can't tolerate that, you cannot win. It's impossible. So you have to be someone who is willing to take all of the negativity, all of the pain, all of the frustration and swallow it and then turn it into things that actually are productive as opposed to sitting down and pouting or pretending you're some sort of fucking victim. That's the game. The game is pain. You swallow the pain, you turn it into productive action and you win. When everybody else sits on the sideline and cries. That's the fucking game, okay? So let's be fucking honest about it. It's hard as fuck, period. If you're not wired for hard as fuck, you shouldn't fucking do it.
Andy Purcell
That's real, man. That's real. We got one more question for you. Got another call in here.
Unknown Co-host
Let's get our guy.
Andy Purcell
Christian. Christian. Christian on the line.
Unknown Co-host
Isn't that what we just had?
Andy Purcell
Christine?
Unknown Co-host
Okay, this is Christine now. It's Christian.
Andy Purcell
Yeah, got it. Give him a call.
Christian
Hello, Christian.
Andy Purcell
What's up, my man?
Christian
What is up, man? How you doing?
Andy Purcell
Oh, man, you know, I'm all right. Thank you for asking. Nobody ever thank you.
Unknown Co-host
That's because no one cares.
Andy Purcell
Oh, God.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah. What's up, bro?
Christian
How you doing, man? It's a pleasure to speak with you guys.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, man. What's going on? Where you at?
Christian
I'm out of Fruitland, Maryland.
Unknown Co-host
Maryland.
Andy Purcell
Maryland.
Unknown Co-host
All right.
Andy Purcell
All right. That's some good lobster up there.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, man, we went to Maryland one time on a lacrosse trip. Got our fucking asses kicked 27 to fucking three by. By a school. A school is called Calvert Hall. I'll never forget it, bro.
Christian
Oh, yeah? Yep.
Unknown Co-host
Straight up ass beating.
Andy Purcell
Wait, is it one point to score?
Unknown Co-host
Yeah. They scored that many goals? Yes.
Andy Purcell
Godly, bro.
Unknown Co-host
Yes, it was. It was an ass beating. That's what I think of when I think of Maryland. That's how. And by the way, that was like 25 years ago. You're bringing up some serious trauma. So, anyway, how can we help? Thanks for bringing up my ptsd, bro.
Christian
You're good. All we got here is Blue Crabs and that's about it.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, lacrosse.
Andy Purcell
Some pretty good lacrosse.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah. All right, brother. So what's up, man? How can we help you today?
Christian
Yeah, so just some context. Me and a good friend of mine, we started a T shirt printing company last summer. June, actually, while I was doing 75 hard for the first time. And we've kind of grown as the years progress. And now we're. We're making a big financial jump. And we've invested in some big equipment, you know, like large format printer. Just big equipment. So we can get into commercial signage and vehicle wraps and stuff like that. Like higher ticket stuff. And when I'm at home and, you know, I'm away from the office, like sometimes I get this feeling like, dude, you're wasting time, like watching a movie with. With the family or like, you know, you guys are going to do this and you're just wasting time. Go home and go work. Like now it's like real. Like you have a financial investment into the company. Like you need to go work. And it's pretty hard to like be present or like try to calm down at all. Because all I can do is, like, visualize what I want in the company, you know, like, oh, I want the branding to be this, and I want the culture to be like this. And it just makes it really hard, if that makes sense, so.
Unknown Co-host
Makes a lot of sense. We were just talking about this. I was just talking about this before we called you regarding something else. So, yeah, it makes a whole lot of sense, bro, but keep going.
Christian
Yeah. I mean, my main question is, like, how do you grow the skill of patience? Because I know. I know what we. What we want in the business and what it's going to look like in 10 years, but I know it's going to take work and time to get there, but, like, how do I not, like, like, completely break down until we get there? Like, I just get this burning feeling in my stomach every time I visualize this stuff. And, you know, maybe it's a good thing, but it's hard to just be present and kind of chill out.
Unknown Co-host
Well, welcome to being an entrepreneur. Okay? You are a real entrepreneur. You are understanding exactly what I was just talking about, which was, this is not for everybody. It's very, very difficult, and it takes up. It takes up everything. I'll answer your question here in a second. Christian is telling you guys what we just talked about on the show, what.
Andy Purcell
That really feels like.
Unknown Co-host
Okay? That is what it feels like. It is all encompassing. It is an ex. An anxious feeling in your stomach 24 hours a day. You can't really figure out why, and you can't get rid of it, all right? And if you can't live that way 24 hours a day for a decade or beyond, dude, you can't do it. It's. That. That's the truth. So to you, Christian, that's exactly normal. So first of all, you're not abnormal for feeling that way. I still feel that way. I feel that way every single day now. How do you get more patience? I had a guitar instructor for about 10 years ago, and he said to me one day, you know, I. I get pretty frustrated when I'm not good at things and I'm not very good at guitar. And he's like, Andy or lacrosse. Yeah, he's, you know, I'm pretty good. Other bro, it would have been 40 to 3.
Andy Purcell
That's right. That's right.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah. So I was working off pure intimidation, bro. I was hacking these in the ears and just trying to get them to stay away. They're. Apparently, people are pretty tough in Maryland.
Andy Purcell
Yeah.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah. So anyway, he said to me, he said, hey, man. He said, you're not very patient. And I said, yes, I'm aware. He said, do you know how you develop patience? And I said, no. And he says, by doing things that require patience. And I'm like, huh? No shit. But that stuck with me, right? It was something I remembered. So now we're going to give you a little hack here, all right? You can't just ignore your family while you build your business, okay? Nor do you need to. Now, let me give you some. Some advice from someone who's been in this for 26 years. I felt exactly like you. And I do feel exactly like you. But what I can tell you from looking back is that I didn't have to feel that way the entire time. I have passed on many events. I have passed on many vacations. I have canceled vacations the day before I was supposed to go many times. I have done all of these things. And the truth of the matter is, bro, I would have ended up here anyway. I would have ended up here anyway. So my advice to you as a young man is to do the best that you can to understand that if you are effective day in and day out, you could still be present with your family, and it will save you regret later, okay? You don't want to miss these times with your. Your family. And it's very easy for us as entrepreneurs to tell ourselves, you know, hey, if I. If I. I've got to sacrifice this for this, but, dude, you don't want to ruin that part of your life when you don't have to, so.
Christian
Right? Yeah.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, bro. So, Ed, my business partner in Arete, Ed Mylet, he has a really good method for this, and I'm going to share it with you. This is his method. Not my method, but what he actually does is he schedules time with his family. And I. I know that sounds like, kind of cold. They don't know that it's scheduled, but he knows it's scheduled, so he actually puts the time in to his phone. Hey, these three hours are for my family. And he turns his phone off during that time. And. Yeah, and, dude, you know, I don't really have to do that because I don't have kids, but it seems to work for him. And from a lot of the people in Artefact, they've started to do the same thing. And they all report that. That's very helpful. So when we talk about, you know, what it's like to be an entrepreneur. Yes, it's very hard. Yes, it takes everything. But just because you're competitive and you want to be in the game more doesn't necessarily mean you won't be where you want to be if you still do other things. Remember, dude, one day we're going to be fucking dead. And it's very important for you to realize that. Like, yes, it's exciting. Yes, you want to win. Yes, you've got your ass on the line. I understand all of those things. But also, you don't want to be alone when you're 70 years old because you fucking punked out on your family right now. You don't have to.
Christian
Yeah, right.
Unknown Co-host
You don't have to. You don't have to. I have a lot of regrets, and one of my regrets is that I missed a lot of things thinking that I had to when I really didn't have to. And I've talked to a lot of entrepreneurs who feel that same way. So take it from me, you know, someone who's been down the path that you're on, you know, you don't have to do that, bro. I can hear it in your voice. You're committed. I can. You guys are already making the financial investments. You're thinking about it nonstop, which means this is not a side project to you. This is a fucking main priority. I can hear it in everything that you said. So you being aware. You being aware of those things and thinking that way gives you a massive advantage over everybody else. Because what we were just talking about before you called in was basically the idea that everybody thinks that entrepreneurship is just something they think of it as, like, they can just do it and it's going to be easy and everybody does it. And I can already tell that you're obsessed. And obsession is what the fuck it takes, bro. So you are going to have to learn and trust that this time with your family is not only important, but it's going to contribute to what you're trying to do because it's going to remind you consistently of why you do it. So that's my take on it, bro. I. I think it's very, very important for you to realize that, you know, you're going to get there either way, dude. I can hear it in your voice.
Christian
I appreciate that.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah. Anything else?
Christian
Well, I mean, I don't want to take up your guys.
Unknown Co-host
No, you're good. But we're here for. We're here for you, bro.
Christian
I pray. I just want to say thank you, man. You know, big shout out to Monte Kaufman and Marcus D1. They last year I was 350 pounds and they pushed me to do 75 hard, dropped like 40 pounds during 75 hard, and dropped another 20. And my wife just completed 75 hard. And I have other family members saying they want to do it now. So, you know, I always go back to you saying, leading by example. Like, you know, you turn the page and everybody else will kind of start turning with you. And it's true. So I just want to say thank you for that.
Unknown Co-host
Nah, bro. I mean, that's. That's what it's about. That's what being a leader is about. That's what being a man's about. That's exactly what this country needs, is men like you who are going to set an example for other people to follow. And when we talk about personal excellence being the ultimate rebellion, it's going to come from the individual level. If we want things to change, we have to change. And if we change, other people see it, they change, and it flows down, you know, from there. So. That's exactly the point, bro. So, like, don't. Don't thank us, man. I. I'm thanking you. Like, thank you for taking that obligation serious, because it's going to be men like you that change the entire country.
Christian
Thank you. Thank you. I appreciate what you guys do, and, you know, it's extremely important.
Unknown Co-host
So all that makes sense that we're talking about here on your question.
Christian
No, it did. Yeah. No. Yeah, 100. I. I know it's normal. Well, I. I don't think it's. I mean, it's not normal between everybody I know. Obviously, the few people that I do know that are in business share the same feeling, but it's just that that's probably the biggest thing I struggle with. Just. It never leaves my head.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, it won't. So it never will. That's. But that's okay. It never will, bro. You're never going to be the same as you were before. You're never going to be mindlessly going through life and, like, you're. The peace you had in ignorance of entrepreneurship will never return. It will never return.
Christian
Yeah.
Unknown Co-host
You will never be standing by the pond with the wind blowing through your hair being like, fuck, this is great. You'll. It'll never be that way again, dude. You're changed. You're different. And maybe after you exit the business one day, maybe that will come back. But once you enter into this game and once you get, like, a taste for it and you realize it's for you, your life will never be the same, dude. You'll never see things the same. You'll never feel the same. And that's not necessarily a bad thing. It's just completely different. And we as entrepreneurs also have to recognize that all of this that we see on the Internet, all of these memes, all of these recommendations, all of this advice, all of these rules, all of these things that we are inundated with are not meant for us. These are meant for regular people doing regular life. We live by a different code, a different set of rules. And if we consume all of that information and we take it to heart and we try to live at those standards that everybody else tells us that we're supposed to live at, we will go crazy because it's not in line with what the reality of our lives are as entrepreneurs. So keep that in mind, because you're going to look out on the Internet and you're going to see everybody doing things a certain way. They're going to be judging you for doing something different. And it'll drive us crazy, dude, if we don't recognize that we have chosen a completely different path in life. So keep that in mind, dude, your mental being obsessed the way that you are already, if you don't balance it out with awareness in terms of that, we're just built different, and we accept that you're gonna. It's gonna really drive you crazy. So that goes for everybody out there building something. Like, dude, their rules and your rules are completely different. And it's something that we have to accept. It took me a long time to accept that. You know, I'm reading all this all the time and hearing people talk about this and balance and this and that and this, and I'm like, I can't do that. And then I finally realized there is no.
Christian
There is no balance.
Unknown Co-host
No, bro, It's. It's a fallacy, dude. And. Yep, you know, trust me, man. All your people and your friends, and they can all still be your friends, and they can all still. You can all still hang out with them, but they're never going to get it. They're. It's never. They're never going to get it. And as long as you get it, you're going to be able to keep those relationships. As long as you can look at them and say, hey, it's cool, they just don't get it and just kind of accept it.
Andy Purcell
I take it personally.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, right, exactly. Like, that's how I look at it, bro. Like, you know, I have people say things to me still, and they're like, oh, you know, And I'm like, yeah, it's cool. They don't get it. Still a good dude, you know what I mean?
Andy Purcell
Just a little retarded, you know?
Unknown Co-host
I didn't say that, but you know what I'm saying. Look, dude, it's just different paths. Yeah, it's just different paths, man. And that's what we were talking about before you called in, brother, was how the entrepreneurship path has been presented as if it's some sort of easy path to create freedom, when reality, it's like running the gauntlet over and over and over again for your whole life, you know? And I don't know. I. I wouldn't change it, but it's just not for everybody, you know?
Andy Purcell
Love it, man.
Christian
No, and, like, I'm only 27, so I'm relatively young, but, like, my whole time growing up, obviously, I had social media the whole time, and. And you guys talk about it, but, like, people just taking pictures with private jets and luxury cars and, hey, I do insider stock trading. Like, you know, but they're full of bs. But, you know, the regular people out there, me included, I mean, I believe it for a long time. Like, what am I doing wrong? Like, what? Yeah, you know what I mean? Like, and so I totally see that, bro.
Unknown Co-host
These people are full of shit, dude. There's services that allow you to rent cars and rent jets, to take pictures for your fucking Instagram, okay? A lot of these people are financing their cars for 10 years. Like, it's so fake, dude. You. You. Look, unless you can order their product, see it on shelves, you know, see a building or some sort of actual organization, or they have. They got to have the receipts, bro, and not just, like, the nice. Okay? What. Where's your employees? Where's your product? Can I order your product? How long you been doing it? Where do you. Where's your offices? What? You know, like, bro, the. A lot. Most of these people are total liars, so you just got to keep that in mind. And by the way, their day will come, okay? The day when their car gets repossessed and they look, they get embarrassed on the Internet or they get caught scamming or whatever, man. Like, their day will come, and it's irrelevant. It's totally irrelevant. You got to show up every single day. And like you said, you know, you got to show up, you got to do everything you can, and you still have to have patience for the long game. You know, every single day has to be executed with urgency, with tasks that are critical that move you forward, and you still have to understand that it's going to take 5, 10 years to really get it moving the way you want. So, yeah, we call that aggressive patience if you've been listening to the show, you know that.
Christian
Yep.
Unknown Co-host
But, dude, look, man, don't sacrifice your family for this, okay? You can. You don't need to. That's, that's the biggest thing I need you to take away. Like, you don't need to make that sacrifice. Schedule that time, be present, put your phone away. The world is not going to burn the down while you're going to a movie or having dinner or even going on a vacation. And the truth of the matter is, the reason I know that is because I all that up. So take it from me.
Andy Purcell
Love it.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah.
Christian
Well, do well. Thank you guys so much. I appreciate it.
Unknown Co-host
All right, brother.
Andy Purcell
Appreciate you, bro.
Christian
Have a good day.
Unknown Co-host
Yep, you too. Yeah, man. I think a lot of people, you know, they think they, they think they gotta give up everything. You don't have to give up everything, bro. You just gotta. You can't coast.
Andy Purcell
Yeah.
Unknown Co-host
You know, you gotta show up every day, give it everything you got. And, and you know, part of success is, is having good relationships and friends. That's. Success is not just a financial thing.
Andy Purcell
Yeah.
Unknown Co-host
You know what I mean?
Andy Purcell
100, dude.
Unknown Co-host
But it definitely includes finances because there's a lot of people are like walls. I'm wealthy and. No, you're not. You, you got good friends, you got good family, you're poor. Right. I'm being honest.
Andy Purcell
That's real.
Unknown Co-host
That's a real thing.
Andy Purcell
That's real.
Unknown Co-host
Like this whole, you can have all.
Andy Purcell
The money in the world to have nobody that you can.
Unknown Co-host
That's right. There's thing. And you want, you don't, you don't want to be poor either way.
Andy Purcell
Yeah.
Unknown Co-host
But the point of the matter is, I get tired of seeing this on the Internet where it's like, this is the new wealth. No, those numbers in your bank account or your investment portfolio is your wealth still wealth. Yeah, let's, let's not. Because all that is is people letting themselves off the hook for their financial misfortunes. Right.
Andy Purcell
The lack of execution.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah. Like, oh, this is the new rich. No, rich is rich. Like, I don't know what to tell you, you know, I, I, you know what I'm saying?
Andy Purcell
I get it.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah.
Andy Purcell
I get it. It's real.
Unknown Co-host
Oh, yeah. You know, feeling good is. I'm so rich.
Andy Purcell
Car declined.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah, right.
Andy Purcell
Yes, yes, you better loyal.
Unknown Co-host
Yes. It all matters, bro. And you don't get to say, like, just like, I don't get to say, oh, I've got a lot of success financially, you know, this over here is great, too. I. I'm not. You can't pretend. You know what I'm saying? Like, now, I'm. But I'm aware of that. And I do have great relationships and all those things. But my. I'm not saying I don't, but I'm saying just because you're fucking poor, you don't get to say you're rich. And you know I'm rich in other ways. Okay. You got some good friends and good family, but your bank account says that you're poor.
Andy Purcell
Yeah.
Unknown Co-host
Let's be honest.
Andy Purcell
That's real.
Unknown Co-host
Okay. And by the way, if you would like to live that way and you're happy, there's nothing wrong with that.
Andy Purcell
If you're really happy.
Unknown Co-host
Yes. But don't pretend you're happy just so you can sound cool on the Internet.
Andy Purcell
I love it, man.
Unknown Co-host
Yeah.
Andy Purcell
I love it, man. Well, guys. Andy, that was three, man.
Unknown Co-host
All right, guys. Well, we'll see you tomorrow for cti. Yeah.
Andy Purcell
Went from sleeping on the flow now.
Unknown Co-host
My jury box froze fuck up, Bow Fuck a stove Counted millions in a.
Andy Purcell
Cold bad bitch booted swole Got her.
Unknown Co-host
Own bank row can't fold Just a no head shot case Close.
Episode: 903. Q&AF: Setting Boundaries, Getting Over Guilt & Developing The Skill Of Patience
Release Date: July 7, 2025
Host: Andy Frisella (#100to0)
Description: Entrepreneur Andy Frisella and his guests engage in candid discussions about trending topics and pressing personal issues, blending insightful advice with humor.
The episode begins with Andy Frisella and his co-host introducing the Q&AF segment, where listeners submit questions to receive answers directly from the hosts. Andy provides various methods for listeners to submit their queries, including email and YouTube. He emphasizes the absence of advertisements, appealing instead for listeners to share the show organically to foster growth and community.
Caller: Kristen
Timestamp: [06:53] – [21:44]
Kristen reaches out seeking advice on establishing boundaries within her romantic relationship to better pursue her personal and professional goals. She explains the challenge of balancing her ambition with supporting her partner, highlighting conflicts arising from differing schedules and priorities.
Kristen's Main Points:
Co-Host's Response: The co-host offers a straightforward approach, emphasizing the importance of clear communication and setting fundamental boundaries. He asserts that in a strong relationship, both partners should inherently support each other's roles and goals. The co-host underscores that successful entrepreneurs typically have supportive partners, sharing his personal experiences where lack of support hindered his progress.
Notable Quote:
“It has been. It absolutely has been. I, I've done the sleep deprivation, saying I've got small kids. I got to go to bed to be my best self.” – Kristen [09:33]
Key Advice:
Caller: Christian
Timestamp: [24:00] – [52:12]
Christian seeks guidance on dealing with guilt and shame over past mistakes as he approaches his 40th birthday. He reflects on regrets from his past, including hurtful actions and broken promises, and struggles with finding a balance between self-forgiveness and accountability.
Christian's Main Points:
Co-Host's Response: The co-host empathizes, sharing that nearly everyone experiences similar feelings of regret and self-criticism. He advises Christian to view these emotions as indicators of personal growth and to focus on applying past lessons to future endeavors. The co-host suggests treating oneself with the same compassion one would offer a friend, highlighting the importance of moving forward while acknowledging past errors.
Notable Quote:
“The only perfect person that's ever existed in the history of humankind is named Jesus Christ.” – Co-Host [25:55]
Key Advice:
Caller: Christian
Timestamp: [40:00] – [58:53]
In a follow-up call, Christian discusses his burgeoning T-shirt printing business and the anxiety it brings. He expresses difficulty in being present during downtime, feeling compelled to constantly strategize and visualize future growth, thus struggling to cultivate patience.
Christian's Main Points:
Co-Host's Response: The co-host reinforces the notion that such feelings are typical for dedicated entrepreneurs. He introduces the concept of "aggressive patience," advocating for relentless execution while understanding that significant achievements take time. The co-host emphasizes the necessity of balancing ambition with personal life, advising Christian to schedule and protect time with family to prevent burnout and maintain perspective.
Notable Quote:
“You are a real entrepreneur. You are understanding exactly what I was just talking about, which was, this is not for everybody.” – Co-Host [43:19]
Key Advice:
Throughout the episode, Andy and his co-host delve into broader themes surrounding entrepreneurship, personal growth, and societal expectations.
Main Themes:
Authenticity vs. Media Portrayal: They critique the often misleading portrayal of entrepreneurship and success on social media, emphasizing the importance of genuine effort over superficial displays of wealth.
Notable Quote:
“There's no right or wrong way here. It's about being effective towards what you're trying to do.” – Co-Host [20:45]
Relationship Dynamics: The necessity of supportive partnerships in achieving significant personal and professional milestones is stressed, countering the independent myth.
Personal Accountability: Both hosts advocate for personal responsibility and relentless pursuit of goals, discouraging complacency and self-pity.
Mental Toughness: Emphasizing mental resilience as a cornerstone for overcoming the inevitable obstacles in entrepreneurial ventures.
The episode wraps up with affirmations of commitment to personal excellence and the importance of supporting each other's journeys. Andy and his co-host encourage listeners to stay hungry, maintain discipline, and foster meaningful relationships without sacrificing personal ambitions.
Final Insights:
Notable Quote:
“You don't have to make that sacrifice. Schedule that time, be present, put your phone away.” – Co-Host [48:46]
Overall, Episode 903 of REAL AF with Andy Frisella offers profound insights into navigating the complexities of personal relationships, overcoming internal guilt, and cultivating patience within the demanding realm of entrepreneurship. Through real-life caller scenarios and unfiltered discussions, Andy and his co-host provide actionable advice for listeners striving to balance ambition with personal well-being.