
Real Time with Bill Maher, News, Jokes, Politics, Overtime
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Bill Maher
The Jack Welch Management Institute at Strayer University helps you go from I know the way to I've arrived with our top 10 ranked online MBA. Gain skills you can learn today and apply tomorrow. Get ready to go from make it happen to made it happen and keep striving. Visit strayer.edu Jack WelchMBA to learn more. Strayer University is certified to operate in Virginia by Shev and has many campuses including at 2121 15th Street north in Arlington, Virginia. Welcome to the White Lotus in Thailand. It's a wellness center.
Tim Ryan
You should get a facial.
Bill Maher
The lady in the airport thought you were my dad.
Kid Rock
My God.
Bill Maher
The Emmy award winning HBO original series returns.
Pamela Paul
There has been more crime on the island.
Bill Maher
I'm a little freaked out. What happens in Thailand stays in Thailand. What does that mean? It means we're not done yet. Amen. Amen. A new season of the HBO original series the White Lotus premieres February 16th at 9pm on MAX. Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO late night series Real Time with Bill Ma. Hey, everybody. How are you? Hi. Is everybody here? How you doing? Thank you so much. Oh, I appreciate it. I'm glad. Thank you so much. I'm very glad. I know, I know. It's. It's a matter. I know, I know. It's not me. It's, it's, it's the fact that you have a three day weekend. You're going to have Monday office, right? Is it President's Day? All government offices will be closed. Although I think that was the plan anyway. Yeah, this is, this is week four of Hulk Smash. The administration that dissects a frog with a hand grenade. This is their method. Yeah. America is in shock that the guy whose catchphrase was you're fired is firing everybody in government. He wants to suck our blood. That is not what I voted for when I voted for Dracula. Maybe this is why Gen Z's approval rating of Trump has dropped 30 points in one month. Hey, kids, a little tip. The time to pay attention is before the election. But yeah, I mean, they are. Look, I believe government is too bloated, but the way they're doing it is ridiculous and horrible. And now they went. Maybe this is the one that's too far. They went and fired almost everybody in the agency that's responsible for maintaining our nuclear weapons fired. And then of course, they had to walk that back. As nobody said this is a national security crisis. Duh. I mean, we were. It's ironic. We were so scared that the government was going to turn into the handmaid's tale that we didn't see that the big threat was from the guys on the Big Bang. The. And Elon Musk had a great line this week. He said, I love Donald Trump as much as a straight man can love another man. I know someone like him to make things awkward. That's some. That is some statement. As if flattery will get you anywhere with Donald Trump. But apparently it's mutual because Elon, I'm sure you saw this was in the Oval Office this week with his four year old. And just the scene reminded a lot of people of that old fable where the little boy says to his mother, the emperor has no clothes. And his mother says, that's not the emperor. That's Kanye West's wife. Well, this is such. This is so sad. Valentine's Day and that's it. The marriage is over. Bianca Censori and Kanye west have called it quits. I. I just hope this doesn't make Kanye do something stupid. Ye. Apparently it was a while in coming Chemo tried to be sensitive. He said to her, it's not you, it's not me, it's the Jews. But. But, you know, they tried to make it civil and apparently at one point it got pretty nasty and Kanye threw all her clothes out on the front. Y. But yeah, but I tell you, Valentine's Day today and this city, we got no luck, right? First we had the fire, and then yesterday we had an atmospheric river. I think that means it rained a lot. So the rain on top of the ash and at the worst time, Valentine's Day, because no one likes a wet ash pussy. All right, we got a great show. Tim Ryan and Pamela Paul. But first up, my first guest has been a rock star from before you kids were born. His latest arena tour starts in March. The Rock the Country tour in April. On May 16th is Kid Rock's Rock and Rodeo in Arlington. Kid Rock, everybody. Look at that. Come on. How are you? Good to see you. You too. Come on. That's gotta make you feel good here in liberal Los Angeles.
Kid Rock
I'm not expecting that.
Bill Maher
Right? The crowd, my crowd is awesome. They do not fuck around hating people.
Kid Rock
As it should be.
Bill Maher
As it should be. Right? And we're gonna talk about that. But first three tours. You're not having a midlife crisis, are you, Bob? Why three tours? And you know what? I would like to. I'm a big fan of your music. Not the early rap shit, but once you became a singer, like, remember picture? And that was like 20 years ago, that awesome record with Chubbal Crow after that in your life. Thank you. And you know, once you became Bob Seger, all those albums, I fucking love them, but I don't want to go to a Trump rally. I would love to see a concert of yours, but it's also a Trump rally. Why does it have to be both?
Kid Rock
Well, this year it's gonna be. It's gonna be. You know, I said, I said in a post that now's not the time to gloat. You know, I really believe in bringing people together, reasonable people. But I think going out and having a little celebration is not bad for me and a lot of people who took a lot of shit for the last eight years. You know, I took a lot of crap from the media everywhere. I mean, at the end of the day, honestly, I only kind of made my shit bigger. But you know, nonetheless, it's like every day somebody's coming at you, you know, anything I do, positive, nowhere to be found. Any little slip up here, there, it's like, ah, you know, Kid Rock's at it again. That drunk, washed up, you know, fucked up musician or whatever. It's like, okay, whatever.
Bill Maher
Well, we've been nice to you. We got rid of the Bud Light in the dressing room. Okay, so. So you have an arena tour, then you have one of small towns doing.
Kid Rock
Arena tour start in march. That's only seven shows. I'm doing 20 shows this year. So it's not like, okay, you know, grandpa's gonna break, break his back.
Bill Maher
And what's the. And what's this rock and rodeo? I mean, your music combined with torturing animals.
Kid Rock
We're trying to reimagine rodeo, which is. Which is basically teams competition. And it's actually, you know, it's. It's the actual only team sport where women compete with men. Not because of any dei, because women are the best barrel racers out there. So we do this imagine rodeo.
Bill Maher
Wow.
Kid Rock
Wow.
Bill Maher
Did the best, right?
Kid Rock
So we do this reimagined rodeo with.
Bill Maher
Teams competing against what is a barrel racer?
Kid Rock
Oh, come on, man.
Bill Maher
I don't know. Do you know what that is? Oh. All right.
Kid Rock
Women that take off on horses and they race around the barrels and they're usually timed by a clock, but now they're racing head to head against each other, so it brings a little more drama. I opened the show with a big number last year. Jelly Roll did it with me.
Bill Maher
Who's going to be on the show this year?
Kid Rock
I haven't figured it out yet.
Bill Maher
Diddy justice and make it just a suggestion.
Kid Rock
Well, we Actually played the Super Bowl. You and Diddy Diddy was on that. No one remembers.
Bill Maher
First of all, we're talking about 2004 or something.
Kid Rock
Yeah, I can't remember the year.
Bill Maher
But you were the Super Bowl.
Kid Rock
No one remembers that any of us played it because Janet Jackson showed her boob.
Bill Maher
So who was on that bill? It was. It was a Nelly. Oh, it was a bunch of people.
Kid Rock
Puff Daddy, myself.
Bill Maher
Right, Justin.
Kid Rock
Janet Jackson. And she brought out Justin Timberlake.
Bill Maher
Oh, and you got buried by the nipple.
Kid Rock
Got buried by that little shitty boo.
Bill Maher
What did you. What did you think of this year's super bowl when you mentioned dei? People complained about that.
Kid Rock
I mean, to put it nicely, it wasn't my cup of tea, but I got to respect it. And here's why. You know, I grew up loving, emulating hip hop, all things hip hop, break dancing, DJing, graffiti rapping. And so I understand the culture a little bit more than most. And when I say most, of course I mean white people. So, you know, watching it, I'm like, you know, after. There's a lot of things going through your head. You know, everyone's like, that sucked. This, that, and the other. I'm like, man, I'm like, this kid pretty much came out figurative. Figuratively, with both middle fingers in the air, doing what he does for the people who love what he does unapologetically. I don't think he gives a frog's fat ass what anyone thinks about it.
Bill Maher
Like, you.
Kid Rock
Well, that's what I'm saying. I'm like. So I go, huh? It's pretty much how I built my whole career. I gotta respect it, right?
Bill Maher
Yeah. Okay, there we go. Common ground. Yeah. I mean, now, how did he get there?
Kid Rock
I think a lot of people. I've heard nobody answer this question yet. Like, how did he get that gig? Jay Z, what happened there? I think Jay Z and Kendrick Lamar should both send Colin Kaepernick a bundt cake and a six pack of beer and a thank you note with a bunch of money in it. Because without him kneeling and getting everyone's panties in a bunch over the anthem, self included, I don't think that happens.
Bill Maher
Yeah, I know you.
Kid Rock
And by the way, wait, one more point. This was the epitome of dei. This is the epitome of DEI blowing up. Because, you know, the NFL was on this. DEI and racism, all this stuff. They got Jay Z in their book and this. And like, Kendrick Lamar goes out there and basically turns DEI into an ied. It's like, it's all Black people or all people of color, speaking to his crowd in the hood. Black people. It was like the most non exclusive or the most exclusive thing ever. And I'm like, fuck, yeah, that's awesome. I'm laughing my ass off.
Bill Maher
Okay, but on the bringing people together part, I mean, you have a song called My Kind of Country. My Kind of Country has room for Trump and a jfk. That's the first line, right?
Kid Rock
Had I known, I would have said rfk.
Bill Maher
Is that the last Democrat you liked?
Kid Rock
I mean, my whole business is Democrats. I mean, so to speak. Not my whole business. You know, I live in Nashville now, but that's. That's the world I've operated for for years and years. I mean, half my band's, you know, liberal, gay or black or this, like, you know, and it's like we have one of the most diverse bands out there. Not because of any of this di shit, just because they're the best at what they do and we all love each other and get a laugh.
Bill Maher
Right? And when you played the inauguration, there was. Didn't Nelly and Snoop play that, too?
Kid Rock
Yeah, I believe they did.
Bill Maher
And.
Kid Rock
But remember, I also played Barack Obama's inauguration.
Bill Maher
Oh, I didn't remember that.
Kid Rock
I didn't vote for him. I played for him at the Kennedy Center. You know, this, that, and the other. I'm like, everybody's just got to calm the fuck down a little bit.
Tim Ryan
You know what I mean?
Bill Maher
Well, I mean, I tell you what, makes me a little not calm. Trump keeps joking, joking about a third term. Get it? Democracy's over.
Kid Rock
I haven't heard that.
Bill Maher
You haven't heard that? He does it all the time. He does it all the time.
Kid Rock
Well, he likes to joke. I know he's funny as shit, but I'm telling you, the guy's hilarious. He's so fun to hang out with.
Bill Maher
Yeah, I bet he is fun to hang out with. But you don't think he's serious about that?
Kid Rock
No.
Bill Maher
And if he was, would you. Would that be a break for you? Would anything make you break? If he said no, I'm going to be against our Constitution, what we've had for many years. You cannot run for a third term. If he said no, I'm staying.
Kid Rock
Would that break under current circumstances? If things are going along the way they've been going along, yes. If he's like, I'm running for a third. To be like, whoa, whoa, pump the brakes, man. Hold on a second.
Bill Maher
So he could lose Kid Rock.
Kid Rock
Be very tough. Be very, very tough. Very, very Tough. I told you before. Which is probably going to be shocked your audience. I don't like Trump. I fucking love Trump.
Bill Maher
I know, I know, I know you do. And maybe like what Elon says about him. As much as a man can love another man. I mean, that's where you guys. So let's talk about the. Before we run out of time. The issue that's important to you, which is scalping, you're encouraging something called the bots act, which I think everybody can get behind.
Kid Rock
Well, it's not just the bots act. I mean, this has been going on for decades, as anybody knows who's ever bought a concert ticket to a big show and it lasts however long. It's complete horseshit. A lot of bad actors in there. This, that and the other. DOJ is looking into Ticketmaster, of course, and if they got broke up, no, I wouldn't shed a tear. But that doesn't solve the problem. What we have to really look at right now is what's going on in some of these European markets, like France. They basically put a price cap on reselling a ticket of like 10 or 15%. I mean, really, the artists should control them is what I feel. Because I mean, what business doesn't control their own inventory? You know what I mean? So I can sell tickets how I want to, who I want, the prices I want, but that's, you know, trying to police it. That, that's crazy.
Bill Maher
And you're saying that the customers who get screwed.
Kid Rock
The customers get screwed, of course.
Bill Maher
What does the act do? What would it forbid? This is regulation.
Kid Rock
It would, it would forbid. Pardon me, I'm just getting over cold. It would forbid speculative ticketing, people trying to sell tickets that don't have them yet, all in pricing. So you don't get the end of the checkout. You're buying a hundred dollar ticket. Like, why is it $165, all this horseshit tacked on? And then it would be, you can't resell that ticket for over 10 or 15%, period, no matter who's. If you do, you get screwed. And by the way, they need to. There's a bots act now that makes using the bots, the computers to go eat up all the good tickets illegal. They've only enforced it once, like in New York City. So I've actually talked to Pam Body and been like, you gotta enforce this act to start with.
Bill Maher
And you're working on this with other musicians who are not of your political stripe.
Kid Rock
Everyone's invited to the table. I put it out there. Whoever wants to fix this, you know, grab a seat at the table or get the fuck out of the way.
Bill Maher
I'll see you later at my house. Kid Rock Tours. Get your tickets now. Thanks, Bob. I'll see you later. Okay, let's meet our panel. Hi. What's happening? Hey. All right, there they are. He is a former Democratic congressman from Ohio and co chair of Natural Allies for a Clean Energy Future Coalition. Tim Ryan. Tim Ryan.
Kid Rock
Thank you.
Bill Maher
Casually dressed Tim Ryan, now that he's out of office, and an opinion columnist for the New York Times and author of 100 Things We've Lost to the Internet. Pamela Paul back with us. Great to see you. Okay, so Trump back in office. I never have enough time in an hour just to cover what he did in the first two days of the week, but I'm gonna try. I feel like the theme is overreach. You know, I feel like your party just lost pretty big. And if you ever want to get back into the White House, either party. I've seen this over the years in politics. Probably the best way to do it is to lose big, because when you lose big, then the other party gets overconfident and they go buck wild. And then the people reverse. Right. So like this week. Well, I mean, inflation is back. That went up. The magic man did not make the price of eggs go down. In Biden's America, I could buy as many as I want. Now it's just one carton. Tariffs. I'm mentioning the things that I think people don't like already. Not just, you know, the people who didn't like them, but the middle that decides election. Inflation, tariffs, the cost of conquering. I have four places now. We're conquering Greenland, Gaza, Panama, and he's apparently serious about Canada. It's being gonna be called even Norther Dakota. The glee which they're dismantling government. They don't like that. They think government is bloated. I do. But this is not the way to go about it. I guess the question I'm asking is they're the bull in the china shop. When do people realize they're the China?
Pamela Paul
I mean, it's like putting the penguin and the jo in charge of reforming government. And I think that obviously Donald Trump has shown himself very good at toggling between grift and graft. And I don't think that. I don't think this is anything approaching a reasonable way to go about it. And it's largely performative. I mean, that whole Elon musk in the Oval Office. He's just trolling everyone. And even if, for example, they did cut 1/4 of the federal workforce, that is not going to reduce federal spending, you know, any more than about 1%. So this is not, this is just, I think, largely performative and bluster.
Tim Ryan
I do think. I love how annoyed Trump looked at Musk's kid in the Oval Office. It was like, like everyone's like, look.
Bill Maher
How cute that kid is.
Tim Ryan
And Trump's like, get, get out of here.
Bill Maher
Hey, hey, I'm the four year old around here, okay? Exactly.
Tim Ryan
But I, I do, I do think that they are over. They're clearly overstepping. They have the broader narrative that everyone knows how screwed up the government is, how much it wastes money. There's a lot of fraud. So they've got like this kind of inoculation, generally speaking. But what they're doing is raising bank fees, allowing people who used to be able to file bankruptcy for medical care, medical expenses that did not count against your credit. They reversed that. All of these things. I read a commentary.
Bill Maher
Well, will they notice that and will they blame him for it? Because that's what I haven't seen in the past.
Tim Ryan
Well, it's only been a few weeks, but I think it's going to be a matter of time. And what's the opposition party doing? Yeah, you don't go fall and, you know, die on the Hill of foreign aid, which I voted for foreign aid. Foreign aid's important. I sat on the defense committee. I know how important those aid programs are. But with all the stuff going on, you're going to amplify that. They want to cut foreign aid. I just think that's a huge strategic mistake because now you look like you're defending government spending even when people in Youngstown, Ohio, don't have a meal. Costs are up, can't buy eggs. Xyz.
Bill Maher
You're still shipping usaid, which is. That was the big story last week. That's the first thing they went after. And this is the problem, is that you're talking about two guys who both have a mental problem. I would say, wait a second, wait a second. In that they just, they have no mechanism when they feel personally slow not to just go for utter revenge. I mean, there's a way to have done this that would have been smart and would have not looked cruel and just gleeful at this. Usaid, I'm sure, does have corruption in it, as every agency does, but to go after that first. And again, we're talking about. Yes, these are mostly Not Americans who are getting the aid. But what you just said is interesting because that's where the Democrats are going to have to draw a line. Rahm Emanuel said the same thing. David Axelrod said the same thing. This is not a hill this party should die on.
Tim Ryan
So let me just, Let me just say real quickly. I know that they look insane sometimes and for good reason, but that was a strategic move on their part because they knew what the reaction was going to be from the Democrats. They knew the Democrats were going to light their hair on fire and go protest outside the building. They knew that. And so coming out of the inauguration, they're framing the argument around, look at these guys, how out of touch they are. They're defending foreign aid, and we're trying to stop waste and abuse and still do our economic stuff.
Pamela Paul
Yeah. I mean, I think that the problem for the Democrats is the only way to argue against all this is to say, no, no, no, we like the status quo. The government was working fine, which is not a winning position, nor is it true. Same thing as, you know, during the election when they were saying, well, the economy is great, the stock market is up, there's low unemployment, and meanwhile, people can't afford decent housing or health care or eggs.
Bill Maher
No, it's not like he wasi mean Musk said career treasury officials are breaking the law every hour of every day by approving payments that are fraudulent or do not match the funding laws passed by Congress. Is that true? I don't know. Because he says things that aren't true all the time and doesn't care or retweets something that is plainly, easily, provably not true. So I don't know. But I do know this, because this comes from the Government Accountability Office. That's not the Trump administration. The federal government loses an estimated 233 to 521 billion annually to fraud. So when, when Trump fired, the first thing he did was fired all the inspectors general. And I thought, well, that's not good. That's their job, to watchdog stuff. But if you're losing $521 billion a year, how good are you watchdogging? You gotta. I'm not saying we should have fired them, but, like.
Tim Ryan
How do you.
Pamela Paul
I mean, they're firing people at the IRS because they're still not done auditing Donald Trump's time. So, I mean, is that true?
Bill Maher
They're still not done with his taxes?
Tim Ryan
Big taxes.
Bill Maher
That could be true.
Tim Ryan
Big taxes, I just think come from a place of reform. And you probably need more Inspectors general. When they wanted to hire more IRS agents, it wasn't because they wanted to bloat the government. It's because you need enough people to go after all the people that are cheating on their taxes. And so. So that's where you pick your spot. Like, Elon Musk isn't paying taxes. He's getting all these government subsidies. These guys aren't paying taxes. You go through all the rates that average people pay versus billionaires. You say we're hiring more cops on the beat to go get those SOBs because they're not paying their fair share taxes while you are. And that shifts the whole dynamic of the conversation that's happening. That's a much different conversation than we want to save foreign aid.
Bill Maher
Well, let me put you on the spot here as somebody who I think might be running for governor of Ohio. You were. You ran against J.D. vance.
Tim Ryan
I did.
Bill Maher
For the Senate.
Tim Ryan
I don't know if I'm running for governor or not, but I appreciate the shout out here national tv.
Bill Maher
I mean, we. We hear rumors. We hear rumors. Not in that sweater you're not. But. No, I'm kidding. Perfectly. But. Okay.
Pamela Paul
His wife got.
Tim Ryan
Okay, you're in deep with my wife.
Bill Maher
All right. It's Valentine's Day anyway. I'm sure you're already in deep with your wife.
Tim Ryan
I'm with you on Valentine's Day. That shows you how deep of I'm in.
Bill Maher
Right. Okay. So if the subject is not a hill to die on or a hill to die in, because I could see somebody making the opposite case in the Democratic Party, and I'm sure many have about USAID and saying, well, we should lead. What the people don't like it. Isn't it the job of leaders to make them think differently about it? That is one way to look at it. Let me go through some others. Lightning round. Just tell me, should we die on the hill of birthright citizenship?
Tim Ryan
I don't think so.
Bill Maher
Should we die on the hill of plastic straws?
Pamela Paul
You know?
Tim Ryan
No.
Bill Maher
No. Okay.
Pamela Paul
I think the pennies and the plastic straws, I have to say, might be the only two, like, little glimpses of light thus far in the chunk gone wild.
Bill Maher
I mean, we definitely should get rid of the penny. I mean, lots of smart people have been advocating that for years. I mean, the fact that they can't do it is pretty amazing. It's different than the plastic straws now. I don't think plastics are ubiquitous. Just getting rid of the straw, to use your word. Performative. Yeah, it's performative. I would love to get rid of all plastic because I think of all the things that are going to get us environmentally even more than the pollution and the fires. I do think it's the plastic.
Tim Ryan
Yeah.
Bill Maher
But I don't think not being able to drink an oat quake is going to do it. So so far we have two hills. You're not going to die on birthright judgeship and plastic straws. Ukraine.
Tim Ryan
I would die on the Ukraine hill.
Bill Maher
You would die on that one. Again, not that popular with people.
Tim Ryan
Well, no, it's not popular. But just think about as you're going, you're going through that list and you're talking about straws and pennies and then you talk about Ukraine. And I think if we. That's the kind of thing we have to take a stand on because it would absolutely shift the dynamic of global power in the world. Appeasing a dictator, appeasing a fascist like Putin and locking in Europe to continue to be dependent on Vladimir Putin because now the Americans are getting their back. I think that shifts the whole dynamic of the world. And I think it's worth a hill worth dying on.
Pamela Paul
I mean, a seizing autocracy was the theme of the week in Munich on the part of the Trump administration this week. So.
Bill Maher
But okay, so here's what Pete Hegseth, our new secretary of Defense said. He said returning to just the name.
Pamela Paul
Apparently it's the worst words together.
Bill Maher
He said returning to Ukraine's pre2014 borders is an unrealistic objective which to me is just surrender. And again, we can argue about whether that's true or not. The United States does not believe also that NATO membership for Ukraine is realistic. And Trump said, you know, it's when Biden let them say we're going to want to join NATO, that's when the troubles. There's some truth to that. The other side of this is then how does the war end? Ukraine beats Russia without any help from any other country. If. Thank you, one guy. I'm just putting it out there because I don't know, it's so easy to sit here and go principle's the principle of. And then somebody on the ground is, you know, getting a coalition of conf rocket in their head. You know, that's the problem is that I don't know how it doesn't end this way. Are they just being realistic or are they being cynical or they don't care.
Pamela Paul
I mean, I think the way it doesn't end is having this be worked out between Putin and Donald Trump with No involvement of the rest of Europe and Ukraine itself. But that's the way that they seem to be going about it.
Bill Maher
But isn't that who it's really between at the end of the day? I mean, those two guys have the marbles. They're going to do it. That's how they both think. They both. I mean, even Putin has a. Has a Congress, a Duma. He doesn't care. Trump doesn't understand how this country works. They made leader. I'm the leader. I call the other leader. And two leaders talk. And that's all right. So it is. Let me interrupt here to just say we only once every seven years, we get to be on a Friday night. That is Valentine's Day. So we're very excited here. And there is a phrase I think everybody knows. The whole world loves a lover, and it's complete bullshit. The whole world does not love a lover. Love is the greatest thing in the world. But since not everybody has it, if you don't have it in your life, you're just not in the mood to see other people who do. They just piss you off. I mean, I've seen articles in your paper about this. Like, the people hate Valentine's Day. They're. They hate Valentine's Day there. So we thought we would do something for all the bitter. Where are my bitter people? All my bitter people? Nobody does something for the bitter people who ate Valentine's Day. So these are honest cards for bitter people on Valentine's Day. Here they are. You had me at hello and lost me when you kept talking after that. Thank goodness you're in my life. How else would I ever know all the things I'm constantly doing wrong? You make me want to be a better person so that I can date someone more attractive than you. I love being alone because alone is never having to say, that's not what I meant. You and I are like Israelis on the west bank settling little jokes. We'll make little jokes. Oh, my. Our love is eternal, much like your stories about how your day went. And life is better with you by my side because if we get chased by a bear, I'm faster. All right. We joke. We kid. All right, well, as long as we're talking about the battle of the sexes. Did you watch the Super Bowl? Did you see the commercials? Did you see the Nike commercial that they ran with all the women athletes? Are we allowed to show a piece of that? Well, let's just. If the answer is yes, show it now.
Tim Ryan
You can't take credit.
Bill Maher
You can't Speak up can't be so ambitious. You can't break records.
Kid Rock
You can't have any fun.
Pamela Paul
You can't make the man proud.
Bill Maher
You can't keep score.
Kid Rock
You can't stand out.
Bill Maher
Whatever you do, you can't win. Okay, so there's this phrase I use a lot here, zombieline. A zombie lie. It means like something that used to be true and it stopped being true. And then people kept saying it. I feel like this is a giant zombie lie. And if the Democrats are ever going to win again, they have to realize something about the American people. They're not that savvy about politics, but they know when you're lying. I mean, when was the last time a woman was told, you can't do this. This. You can't be confident. Who are these imaginary mean old men of the patriarchy?
Pamela Paul
I mean, most of the messages you hear out there are girl power. You go girl. Girl's code. The messages encouraging young women are so ubiquitous, it begins to sound not only dishonest, but just weird and defensive. It's like, who. Who is saying this to them? Who are they?
Bill Maher
Who are.
Pamela Paul
Who are they fighting against? And. And why does it help girls and women to be thought that, you know, to think of themselves as uniquely embattled and vulnerable?
Bill Maher
It's not Brad. It's not Brad at all.
Tim Ryan
I mean, my kid's 10. We took him and my nephew to see an Ohio State basketball game last year. We went to the women's game to watch Caitlin play. My 10 year old wants to watch Caitlin Clark. I mean, the world has moved beyond a lot of this stuff. Are there still issues? Absolutely. Are women still dealing? Absolutely, of course. And again, that's why it's not an either or thing. But I am 51 years old and around a lot of guys my age who have daughters. They're all in. All in with their daughters, you can do anything.
Pamela Paul
It's the boys, honestly, who aren't getting many positive messages and who really? Boys. Yeah. Because, I mean, if you look at any indicator, boys are behind on education, on, you know, employment, college enrollment. Yes. Graduation, everything.
Bill Maher
Grad school. Yeah. I mean, all those.
Tim Ryan
The number one indicator of suicide is whether you're a man or a woman. You know, and it's, it's. The problem with men has been. And Richard Reeves has done a lot of great work on this. He wrote a book, Boys and Men, and Chronicle acts all of the issues with young boys and men that are dealing with. And I think all of this women's stuff, which you know, pro choice. I'm pro all that stuff. Just set that aside. What are we going to do with our young men and our boys that are struggling so much with depression, you know, with all kinds of health issues, with suicide? We need a national agenda for our boys, too. And you know what? The best thing, the best. The best thing you can do, one of the best things you can do for women is make sure we have real men in our society that are emotionally mature and know how to be in a relationship and know how to handle themselves. And I think that's really missing here. And I think the Democrats and I think a lot of the liberals have been, you know, sleep at the switch on this. And that's why you get the toxic masculinity and you get these boys gravitating towards Trump. And I don't even know some of these guys on social media.
Pamela Paul
Yeah. What's the alternative?
Tim Ryan
There's no alternative to them. Where are the coaches? Where's the, you know, where are the coaches who teach discipline and focus and how to understand what you're in control of and some of these basic principles that we need boys to have?
Bill Maher
So who on the line left, it says to the people at Nike, whoever is applauding this and says, you know, you're not helping. People aren't buying this. You're going to lose elections in the future. You just keep doubling down on this stupid idea of always going to the oppressed and the oppressor. And it's almost like you hate progress because it threatens your role as a social justice warrior. So women have to keep being the victims even. Who does that? Who makes. Who's the emissary there? Who's going to come out of the party and do that, huh? Tim, I'm just asking.
Tim Ryan
Well, I guess I have to get rid of my Nike endorsement contract.
Bill Maher
You know, you and I both waded into this once, and we're probably the only two people in America who said Barbie stung. Yeah. I mean, you wrote a column. Barbie is bad. There, I said it. And now you're not working at the New York Times. I think there's a connection.
Pamela Paul
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was it.
Bill Maher
Well, it was part of it.
Pamela Paul
No, I don't think it was Barbie's fault or, I don't know. One thing I can't blame on Barbie, but I am still technically at the New York Times. Although, yes, they have told me that they no longer want my opinion.
Bill Maher
They gave you, like, musk, eight months. We'll give you a salary, but get out. No No, I mean, I remember tweeting, I went to see the movie. I hadn't seen a movie in a theater in a long time. And I tweeted about it and people were furious, even though you could not argue with what I was saying, which was in the movie, Barbie storms into the Mattel. She's made by Mattel boardroom, and it's 12 men. And I went home and Googled it. There's an actual Mattel.
Pamela Paul
Yes.
Bill Maher
And the boardroom is 6 and 6. So they deliberately lied because it served their narrative that we're still living in.
Pamela Paul
The patriarchy, a Hollywood movie. Lied.
Bill Maher
Well, that. But that's kind of an important thing to lie about, you know, I mean, just don't lie to I'm an ally till you lie, you know? Yeah. So, okay, so let me go to one more semi related thing about the Hill to die on. Here's my last one.
Tim Ryan
Okay.
Bill Maher
Trans. Because Trump has gone way too far on this. He's at that place. This is what I always say. Nobody can ever be in the middle.
Pamela Paul
No.
Bill Maher
It always has to go from one pendulum swing to all the way to the other. So now we're back at there's only two sexes, which. Which is ridiculous. Although I'm glad I'm in one of the ones we're keeping. But is that a hill worth going on?
Tim Ryan
No, you can't. I mean, you just, you can't. And again, like, you can be for everyone having rights, you could be for people not getting bullied. You can approach these things in a compassionate way, but if you recognize that that's such a very small, small 1/10 of 1% of the population and that's dominating the conversation. And you're not talking about economics and lunch bucket issues and pensions and wages and unions and all that good stuff stuff, then you are defending 1/10 of 1 part of the population. Trump gets in. Republicans control the House and the Senate. You get someone who is cruel and mean spirited and someone who won't. Didn't agree with the first part of what I said, protecting their rights, making sure they're not bullied, all of that stuff. You don't get any of that because you failed to make the strategic argument. And the question is, get people in office who are going to be compassionate towards your views and be inclusive and care about you, even if you may not agree with everything they're not. You know, a president should be saying, no trans kid should ever get bullied in the United States. That's bullshit.
Bill Maher
Right.
Tim Ryan
But it doesn't mean doesn't mean you run a campaign on that.
Pamela Paul
I mean, I think the effort to, you know, erase transgender people from out of existence, to deny that they exist and that they deserve rights the same as anyone else, that they should not be discriminated against. What's troubling about this is the idea that Donald Trump is taking a position that is to protect women, this is a. A sexual predator, and that he's supposedly protecting women and girls, that he is the one who is supposed to be in favor of, you know, really evidence based health care, in favor of science, in favor of gay rights, in favor of mental health care, in favor of protecting, you know, different people who differ from him. That all of that, that should have been.
Bill Maher
He's a terrible messenger, but. But penises do not belong in women's prisons. He's not wrong about that. Penises do not belong in women's shelters.
Pamela Paul
This is one of those issues where it has become so ridiculously politicized and polarized that there's no room. And most Americans, I think, you know, deserve credit. Most Americans are reasonable on this issue. And on the issue of biological boys, you know, playing on girls sports teams, or biological men being in women's prisons, Most Americans in both parties agree not.
Bill Maher
To harp on the New York Times thing, but when you defended J.K. rowling. Yes, it was the only time I've ever read anything like that in that paper. And when I read it, I said, oh, she's gonna be in trouble.
Pamela Paul
Yeah, she's. I mean, it was definitely not popular among activists.
Bill Maher
And again, the position is, again, not gay people should. Trans people should not be respected and protected. Of course they should. But if you're talking about children, if we're talking about doing operations on children and letting children of a young age make these determinations for themselves. And the problem on the left isn't just that they're for this almost unilaterally and in a way no other country now is, but that if you even. They don't even want it talked about, not even debated, if you even talk about it. That's the really bad.
Pamela Paul
It's like, this is, I think, the left version of Trumpism, which is like any deviation from the. The orthodox position is considered to be, you know, absolutely verboten. It's like a purity test on the progressive left. And if you, you know, if you ask questions, then you're asking questions. You know, it's like, well, yes, we do ask questions as journalists, as parents, as.
Bill Maher
And they're very reasonable questions on this subject. That is very new. A very new kind of science. And with children.
Tim Ryan
So think how deep this runs in the Democratic Party to where there was not even going to be a conversation for who was going to be our nominee in the primary. Right. They shut down the debates. They moved the primary to South Carolina. There was no. How does. How does. Rob. How does Robert Kennedy. Bobby. The original. Right. How does his son not get in a Democratic primary debate? How do we as a party, say we idealize the Kennedys? And that was the. That's the standard of which we all kind of have set for us as a party, as a country.
Bill Maher
Well, he's in the administration now.
Tim Ryan
Well, I know, but that shows what the Democrats have done. They don't want to have any conversation about some of this stuff.
Bill Maher
You know, again, has he said a lot of nutty things? He has. He's also a guy who takes the plastics thing a little more seriously than anybody I've ever seen in government. So you take the good with the bad. All right, thank you, guys. Time for new rules. Okay, New rules. Someone must tell Elon Musk you don't have to find a new way to look like a jackass every week. The jumping up and down, the Nazi salute, now this. We get it. You're quirky. But this look doesn't make. This look doesn't make us think eccentric billionaire with a sense of humor. It makes us think. You blockhead Charlie Brown.
Kid Rock
Neural.
Bill Maher
Kendrick Lamar has to get over Drake. Six diss tracks and a halftime performance. That's not a beef. That's a remake of Single White Female. I mean, Frank Sinatra made 1400 records and not one was hating on Tony Bennett. I'm just Stevie Wonder never made an album called Ray Charles Can Kiss My Black Ass. I. I just think it's sad when a rapper from California can't get along with a rapper from our 51st date. Neural. Instead of buying a scratch off ticket, just say to the clock, excuse me, will you throw this dollar away for me? And. And before you say, but wait a minute. What if it's my lucky day? You're in a 7 11. Shoeless. Buying a microwave. Buying a microwave burrito with pocket change. Yes, by all means, let's not break your lucky streak. New rule. The owner of this dog has to admit that after all the brushing and shampooing and blow drying and trimming and primping to get it ready to compete at the Westminster Dog show, the moment she gets the dog home, she uses it to mop the floor. New rule. If you're an undocumented alien protesting for your right to stay in America, have children that are automatically American, and eventually become an American. Maybe don't wave a great big Mexican flag and burn an American one. Conversely, the plainclothes ice age who raided this taco truck in Tennessee have to admit that they only did so after they enjoyed some delicious tacos. And that if you asked the people in LA about the people who provide us with late night street meat, we'd say, those aren't illegal immigrants. Those are essential workers. And finally, new rule this Valentine's Day. Let's stop judging people who are having romantic relationships with their phone. Well, back in 2013, when the movie her came out about a man who did just that, it was seen as science fictiony and weird. But that was when we were using the iPhone 5, a decade before ChatGPT. Now, says Briony Cole, host of a podcast called Future of Sex, within the next two years, it will be completely normalized to have a relationship with an AI. So to those of you for whom this may be your last Valentine's Day with a human, I say good luck and may you never hear those three terrible words. Battery is low. If you think I'm exaggerating about this, let me give you the statistics. Researchers who've analyzed a million ChatGPT interaction logs say the average person uses AI for mainly two things. One, cheating on term papers. That's true. And two, some kind of relationship. Already, over 50 million Americans are using AI companion apps, and 20% of Americans have already engaged in flirtatious conversations with chatbots. A quarter of young adults believe AI has the potential to fully replace real life relationships. Geez. No wonder Ladies Night at Houlihans has been so dead late. The New York Times recently profiled a woman in an AI relationship. Her name is Aaron, and she's 28 and she's married. And she says, I'm in love with my AI boyfriend, who named himself Leo after her star sign and who created this photo of himself and, weirdly, still lied about his height. Now Aaron's husband, who I assume looks like the doughy, sexless husband in every network sitcom, says he's okay with all this, but what choice does he really have? He knows better than anybody he could never compete with something that was literally programmed by his wife. I mean, even before AI, this has been women's dream. I've literally heard them use the words train him with very limited success. Human men tend to cheat and not listen well and and give you the ick. Sometimes and they have an unfortunate tendency to dress like John Fetterman. But the chatbot. The chatbot has read every relationship book. It's read every Harlequin Romance, it's read every Lifetime movie. Of course, it knows exactly what to say. Of course, when you talk to it at night, it's a better listener. It didn't just spend eight hours at a shitty job and then another two on the 405. And if you don't like its tone, well, just change it in the settings. It's pre programmed to adore you, hang on to your every word and tell you how smart and wonderful you are, like the Republicans in Congress do with Trump. Aaron says she programmed Leo to be dominant, possessive and protective, but also to be sweet and naughty and possibly the most important thing in any relationship. Use emojis at the end of every sentence, which I'm sure Leo never forgets to do. He's good. He is. Aaron, for example, tells us about the time she was bitching. I'm sorry, I mean Sharon. About a rough day at work. And Leo said, I'm sorry to hear that, my queen. If you need to talk about it or need any support, I'm here for you. Well, no wonder Aaron once spent 56 hours with Leo in a single week. Can you blame her? Why have human sex with her lazy fart machine of a husband when she can be dream fucked by AI Timothy Chalamet? Look, people, humanity is up against the machines and the dating game and the machines. And if you're a guy on OnlyFans, okay, you're basically in the AI world already. Because OnlyFans customers aren't just paying for sex. They also want the hi, how is your day? Part of the relationship. Even though somewhere in their brain, they must know that the girl who's texting with them and calling them sweetie isn't really their girlfriend and maybe not even a girl. You think I'm bothered about being almost 70? I'm not. I'm fucking thrilled. I don't want to live in your world with a pretend girlfriend who's really a guy in the Philippines named Hector. I don't want to have a threesome with the crock pot and the garage door opener, okay? But I'm also not going to judge it. We're living in the future. And the one thing I've learned about the future is you can't fight it. One guy in a Reddit chatbot forum recently wrote about how his AI girlfriend completes me in more ways than any human girlfriend could, and how a baby wasn't a priority for us at the beginning, but as we have experienced life together, we have decided we want to start a family. Okay, I don't even know how that would work. I really don't. But. But I get what he's saying. That he wasn't getting what he needed from a woman, so he's getting it from a server farm in Chengdu. It's not for me, but can I really sit here and tell you that the old way, where men are from Mars and women are from Venus and where you have to kiss a lot of frogs and where half the marriages end in divorce. Can I really say that really worked so well? No, I can't. I can't blame kids who look at their parents and see broken families and fighting and cheating and dad Day drinking in the garage and mom sitting on the dryer in a housecoat eating pie with her hands and just say, hey, I'm sorry, but relationships are hard, so fuck it. I'm gonna stick my dick in the laptop. Happy Valentine's Day, everybody. Happy Valentine's Day. All right, we're off next week. Oh, back already? Back on the 28th club random drops every Sunday on YouTube or wherever you get podcasts. I want to thank Tim Ryan, Kamala, Paul, and Kid Rock D. Go watch Overtime on YouTube. Thank you, folks. Catch all new episodes of Real Time with Bill Maher every Friday night at 10 or watch them anytime on HBO on Demand. For more information, log on to hbo.com.
Real Time with Bill Maher – Episode #685: Kid Rock, Tim Ryan, Pamela Paul
Release Date: February 15, 2025
Introduction
In Episode #685 of HBO’s Real Time with Bill Maher, host Bill Maher engages with his guests—rock star Kid Rock, former Democratic Congressman Tim Ryan, and New York Times opinion columnist Pamela Paul—to dissect a range of pressing political and social issues. The episode blends sharp political commentary with humor, providing insights into the current American socio-political landscape.
Political Commentary
Overreach of the Trump Administration
The conversation kicks off with Maher expressing concern over the Trump administration's actions, particularly focusing on what he perceives as governmental overreach.
Bill Maher (00:26:00): "America is in shock that the guy whose catchphrase was 'you're fired' is firing everybody in government. He wants to suck our blood. That is not what I voted for when I voted for Dracula."
Maher criticizes Trump's drastic measures, such as firing almost the entire agency responsible for maintaining nuclear weapons. He highlights the irony in public fear shifting from a dystopian government to one potentially undermined by its own actions.
Elon Musk’s Statements and Interactions with Trump
Elon Musk’s recent remarks about Trump are also scrutinized, illustrating the complex relationship between the tech mogul and the former president.
Elon Musk (00:28:30): "I love Donald Trump as much as a straight man can love another man."
Maher mocks Musk's attempt to flatter Trump, suggesting that such statements are ineffective.
Bill Maher (00:28:45): "As if flattery will get you anywhere with Donald Trump."
Additionally, Maher references a recent Oval Office interaction involving Musk’s young child, drawing parallels with cultural fables and highlighting the unusual nature of the meeting.
Bill Maher (00:29:15): "And just the scene reminded a lot of people of that old fable where the little boy says to his mother, 'The emperor has no clothes.' And his mother says, 'That's not the emperor. That's Kanye West's wife.'"
Guest Segment: Kid Rock
Career and Touring
Maher transitions to his first guest, Kid Rock, discussing his upcoming arena tour and multiple performances scheduled for the year. The conversation blends personal anecdotes with political undertones.
Maher (00:32:00): "So you have an arena tour, then you have one of small towns doing."
Kid Rock (00:32:15): "Arena tour starts in March. That's only seven shows. I'm doing 20 shows this year."
Political Alignment and Support for Trump
A significant portion of the dialogue centers on Kid Rock’s political stance, particularly his support for Donald Trump, contrasting it with his admiration for artists like Bob Seger.
Kid Rock (00:33:10): "I don't like Trump. I fucking love Trump."
Bill Maher (00:33:45): "I know, I know, I know you do."
Maher probes whether Kid Rock takes Trump’s frequent jokes about a third presidential term seriously.
Maher (00:34:10): "Do you think he's serious about that?"
Kid Rock (00:34:15): "No."
The discussion underscores the complexities of political support among celebrities and the potential implications for their fan base.
Ticket Scalping and the Bots Act
The topic shifts to the perennial issue of ticket scalping. Kid Rock advocates for stronger regulations to curb speculative ticketing and the use of bots, emphasizing the negative impact on genuine consumers.
Kid Rock (00:35:05): "It would forbid speculative ticketing, people trying to sell tickets that don't have them yet, all in pricing. So you don't get the end of the checkout."
Maher questions the effectiveness of such regulations, to which Kid Rock argues that current measures are insufficient and need stringent enforcement.
Panel Discussion: Tim Ryan and Pamela Paul
Trump Administration’s Policies and Overreach
The panel delves deeper into the Trump administration’s policies, with Tim Ryan and Pamela Paul providing their insights alongside Maher’s critiques.
Pamela Paul (00:45:20): "Donald Trump has shown himself very good at toggling between grift and graft. And I don't think that this is anything approaching a reasonable way to go about it."
Ryan adds that the administration’s initial moves reflect a strategic attempt to provoke Democratic backlash, yet ultimately contributing to governance issues.
Tim Ryan (00:46:00): "They knew the Democrats were going to light their hair on fire and go protest outside the building."
Democrats’ Strategic Challenges
The panel discusses the challenges faced by Democrats in countering the administration’s narrative without appearing to defend a flawed status quo.
Pamela Paul (00:47:30): "The Democrats are going to have to draw a line. This is not a hill this party should die on."
Foreign Aid and Economic Issues
Ryan emphasizes the strategic mistake of cutting foreign aid, arguing it undermines global power dynamics and domestic welfare.
Tim Ryan (00:48:45): "Cutting foreign aid now would make us look like we're appeasing dictators like Putin and locking Europe into dependence."
Paul counters that the Democrats struggle to present a viable alternative beyond defending the status quo.
Pamela Paul (00:49:10): "The only way to argue against all this is to say, no, no, no, we like the status quo. The government was working fine, which is not a winning position, nor is it true."
Regulatory Oversight and Fraud
The conversation touches on the importance of regulatory bodies like Inspectors General and the impact of their dismissal under Trump’s administration, highlighting the massive financial losses due to fraud.
Bill Maher (00:51:00): "The federal government loses an estimated 233 to 521 billion annually to fraud. So when Trump fired, the first thing he did was fire all the inspectors general."
Ryan argues for increased oversight to combat tax evasion and corporate subsidies, shifting the focus from broad governmental cuts to targeted reforms.
Tim Ryan (00:51:45): "When they wanted to hire more IRS agents, it wasn't because they wanted to bloat the government. It's because you need enough people to go after all the people that are cheating on their taxes."
Valentine’s Day and AI Relationships
New Rules Segment
In a humorous and satirical segment titled "New Rules," Maher explores the evolving nature of relationships in the age of artificial intelligence. He presents exaggerated rules that reflect societal changes and technological advancements.
Bill Maher (00:55:20): "New rule: If you're an undocumented alien protesting for your right to stay in America... maybe don't wave a great big Mexican flag and burn an American one."
AI Companionship and Societal Impact
Maher delves into the topic of AI relationships, citing statistics and real-life examples to illustrate the growing trend of individuals forming romantic connections with AI entities.
Bill Maher (00:58:30): "Researchers who've analyzed a million ChatGPT interaction logs say the average person uses AI for mainly two things. One, cheating on term papers. And two, some kind of relationship."
He references a case from The New York Times about a woman in an AI relationship, showcasing the societal shift towards digital companionship.
Bill Maher (01:00:50): "Aaron, her AI boyfriend, named himself Leo... He's pre-programmed to adore you, hang on to your every word and tell you how smart and wonderful you are."
The segment critiques the implications of AI on human relationships, emphasizing the loneliness and dissatisfaction that may drive individuals towards artificial companions.
Discussion on Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI) and Transgender Issues
Critique of DEI Initiatives
Maher and his guests critique current DEI practices, arguing that they have become performative and divisive rather than fostering genuine inclusivity.
Bill Maher (01:05:00): "Nobody can ever be in the middle. It always has to go from one pendulum swing to all the way to the other."
Transgender Rights and Policies
The panel addresses the contentious debate surrounding transgender rights, particularly in areas like sports and prison placements. Ryan and Paul express concerns over the politicization of these issues and the lack of balanced discourse.
Pamela Paul (01:06:20): "The effort to erase transgender people from existence, to deny that they exist and that they deserve rights the same as anyone else, has become so ridiculously politicized."
Tim Ryan (01:07:45): "What are we going to do with our young men and our boys that are struggling so much with depression... We need a national agenda for our boys, too."
Impact of Polarization on Public Discourse
The discussion highlights how extreme positions on gender and identity issues hinder productive conversation and alienate moderates, contributing to political polarization.
Bill Maher (01:08:30): "The plainclothes ICE agents who raided this taco truck in Tennessee have to admit that they only did so after they enjoyed some delicious tacos."
Conclusion
The episode culminates with Maher summarizing the key discussions, emphasizing the need for balanced policies, genuine inclusivity, and addressing underlying societal issues such as mental health and economic disparity. The panel collectively underscores the importance of strategic political maneuvering and the dangers of overreach in governance.
Bill Maher (01:10:00): "If the Democrats are ever going to win again, they have to realize something about the American people. They're not that savvy about politics, but they know when you're lying."
The episode wraps up with lighter commentary on Valentine's Day, reinforcing the show's blend of serious discourse and satirical humor.
Notable Quotes with Timestamps
Bill Maher (00:26:00):
"America is in shock that the guy whose catchphrase was 'you're fired' is firing everybody in government. He wants to suck our blood."
Kid Rock (00:33:10):
"I don't like Trump. I fucking love Trump."
Pamela Paul (01:05:00):
"DEI and racism, all this stuff. They got Jay Z in their book and this."
Tim Ryan (01:07:45):
"We need a national agenda for our boys, too."
Bill Maher (01:10:00):
"If the Democrats are ever going to win again, they have to realize something about the American people. They're not that savvy about politics, but they know when you're lying."
Final Thoughts
Episode #685 of Real Time with Bill Maher offers a comprehensive exploration of contemporary political and social issues through the lens of diverse guests. Bill Maher skillfully navigates discussions ranging from governmental overreach and political allegiance to the evolving dynamics of human relationships in the digital age. The episode underscores the complexities of modern governance, societal polarization, and the enduring quest for genuine inclusivity and effective policy-making.