
Real Time with Bill Maher, News, Jokes, Politics, Overtime
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A
This episode is brought to you by Redfin. You're listening to a podcast, which means you're probably multitasking, maybe even scrolling home listings on Redfin, saving homes without expecting to get them. But Redfin isn't just built for endless browsing. It's built to help you find and own a home with agents who close twice as many deals. When you find the one, you've got a real shot at getting it. Get started@redfin.com own the dream. Last night you spent two hours deciding what to wear to the party this morning. It'll take you two minutes to list it on Depop and make your money back. Just grab your phone, snap a few photos and we'll take care of the rest. The sheer dress and platform heels you'll never wear again. There's a birthday girl searching for them right now. Your one and done look is about to pay for your next night out, or at least the ride home. Your style can make you cash. Start selling on Depop, where taste recognizes taste. Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO late night series Real Time with Bill Maher.
B
Thank you very much, people. How are you? Okay, thank you. Real Time regulars. I appreciate it. Thank you. You sound like a great crow. I know why you're happy. Great news. Peace at last. We have an agreement. A deal. A peace deal, not the Iran war. Blake Lively and Justin Baldoni. That's who I'm talking about, man. You're reading about this for like a year. Went on all this arguing, ensuing, and then it turns out no settlement money at all. Just over a movie called It Ends with Us that everybody hated. Did you see that movie? It was harder to get through than the Strait of Hormuz. Oh, yes. Okay, well, the war. Okay, so we are officially ended with Operation Epic Fury. And now we have moved on to Project Freedom, which is also over. Really? No, I'm not kidding. That was Project Freedom. That was our attempt to escort the ships through the Strait of Hormuz, where there are now 1800 ships stuck. Last person who needed this many escorts was Hunter Biden. So. But Iran, yeah, they are blocking the strait and they say they're going to collect tolls now of all the ships. And Trump is furious. Furious that he didn't think of it first is what he's so. It's a. It's a game of chicken. And Trump said he wants the Iranians to know America does not blink, lose interest and wander away. Yes, we do that all the time, but we don't blink. But we kind of have to. We kind of have to. Because we've apparently used up all our missiles. Yeah, they found not all, but our stockpile is greatly depleted. This is so ridiculous. America, the most strapped country in the world, ran out of bombs. It's like Diddy running out of baby oil. I mean, and. But let's not be gloomy. It's Mother's Day on Sunday. Do you have mothers? I had one. It's very common. And of course, there's a baby boom over at the White House. You know this in the administration. A lot of people having babies over there. And for the press spokesman. You've seen her, Carolyn Levitt. Yes. She just. What timing. She just had a baby. And they asked her, you know, are you excited to be a mom again? And she said, what a stupid question. Do your research. Of course I'm excited to be a mom. Listen, if you are old enough to be watching this show, you were born when your mother could have an abortion. She had the right to have an abortion. And that is not the case anymore, really, in a lot of this country. So maybe when you write a card this year, say, thanks, Mom. You could have killed me and you didn't. Oh, and speaking of Gilling, apparently they found Jeffrey Epstein's suicide note. Apparently it was from the guy, his cellmate, who Epstein says tried to kill him. But he's the guy who found the note. And it says, they investigated me. And then in all caps, it says found nothing. Three explanation points. Who does that sound like? I can't quite place it. No, no, I'm not suspicious. I'm not susp. But the note does end by saying, thank you for your attention to this matter. Okay, good news for Gen Z. We may be wearing masks again. Well, because you heard about the cruise ship. There's a cruise ship out there that has hantavirus. Ooh, probably. This is nasty. Three people have died. Hantavirus. And the first report said there was a flight attendant who got it from the passengers. Boy, suddenly spirit doesn't sound that bad, does it? But no. But no, the flight attendant tested negative, which is good news because it would be ironic if the flight attendant had hantavirus and the cure was peanuts. All right, we've got a great show. Representative Dan Crenshaw and Donna Brazile are here. But first, he is a Democratic senator from Pennsylvania and he is my friend. Senator John Fetterman is over here. John, Good to see you again. All right. All right, John, you're wearing your good black. Did you have a. Yeah, yeah. Did you have A speech on this.
C
Should I mix it up to, you
B
know, did you have a speech on the Senate floor or something where you had to look your best? No. I like your outfit. I do. So I read your op ed today. I think it was in the Washington Post. And it's interesting because we often find ourselves sort of in the same place politically, I think.
C
Exactly. Yeah. Where when your values haven't changed, but the party really has changed and it's kind of put you at odds and.
B
Yeah. You used the term increasingly lonely. You said you feel increasingly lonely as a Democrat. Do you want to unburden yourself and tell us about that?
C
Yeah, well, I mean, some people think it's like a glamorous life and it is not, at least for me. You know, we have plainly
B
what we.
C
No, I mean, I mean from a lonely perspective. You know, things that used to be part of our values here as a party that they shifted now, whether it's like specifically Israel and the Jewish community and now also the border security and then also recently the two longest shutdowns in history. And I've, you know, had to vote against the caucus. I don't, I don't enjoy that. But we used to be the party that would always refuse to shut the government down, and now we now have shut it down and dropped a lot of mass chaos, and I just couldn't be a part of that.
B
Yeah, I think we get the same charge levied against us that we're picking fights with the left. We're not picking fights. We're just not avoiding them. I mean, you used the term an orgy of socialism recently. You said that what you see, it's what you see in the Democratic Party. I do, too.
C
Yeah. Well, I mean, you have. Whether it's like the mayor in Seattle, I mean, she's absolutely a socialist in New York, and a lot of these candidates across the country, and that's really moving towards that. And people that are proud to be labeled as a socialist, that used to be like, was a smear when I was running my first cycle and now that's becoming more normalized. And now I think that's a very dangerous, slippery slope for us to be. And now I've spoke to people that had to live under socialism and. Or communism, and they are like, they are morons if they think that socialism is the answer. You know, I've lived under that and thank God we are now.
B
Well, we already have a great deal of socialism. And I've made the point a million times on the show as we Should. All Western democracies are quasi socialist. There are certain things that the government should do. You don't want the private enterprise to be controlling the Marine Corps and Social Security and Medicare, Medicaid, obviously these things. We have socialism. They're just proposing something way more than that. And by the way, you said socialism. Dirty word. Yes and no. What really was a dirty word, which isn't anymore, is communism.
C
Yeah.
B
I mean, this woman in New York who is Mayor Mondame's right hand woman, she tweets out, elect more communists. This guy, Graham Platner.
C
Yes. Yeah. It's not a slur. If I refer to him as a communist. That's his own term that he used for himself. Yes, antifa and these other kinds of extreme things. Now that's his own words. That's not my view and I'm not using that as a slur.
B
But, but the idea that communist is not a dirty word, I think we need to pause here and say, okay, this is a watermark. This is a watershed mark, a moment in American history where we should pay attention. And my guess is because AI is going to be taking everybody's jobs, communism is only going to get more popular.
C
Well, I sure hope not, because, you know, like if our party, it's like that, it's that expression, you know, bad ideas refused to die. And now that's coming back. And a lot of this, the Trump and the backlash is making more and more things possible in the Democratic Party. And I'm consistently going to resist that kinds of extremes and those extremes that cost us in 2024. We all have to remember that we need to have an election against both sides. We're accountable for both sides in these kinds of states that really depend to deliver for the presidency. And that's why I refuse to be engaged. I know how to pay the bills as a Democrat right now. And my colleagues and people that are running, whether for the Senate or the House, they are literally running on Fuck Trump. I mean, that's literally. They have campaign commercials that. And it's absurd. And we are getting to that point and I refuse to engage in that extreme. Those terms. And we have to find a better way forward. And now I've been punished to try to find value in certain views now, like Philip Ballroom, you know, we've talked about that. I don't care about the Ballroom.
B
I don't either.
C
Yeah, I mean, it's like, it's so stupid.
B
It's such a Rorschach test of whether you just hate.
C
Yeah.
B
Because first of all, like we saw with the assassination attempt a couple of weeks ago, America probably does need. You know what the problem is? I said it to you there today on the podcast, which I think is on next week. It's the word ballroom. It sounds. Ballroom sounds like, you know, fops are pirouetting around. And it's just if they called it the State Dinner, national center, it would be different. But this is America and we don't want people sitting in tents. God. Dinner. I mean, it's just, I mean, you
C
know, I was two tables away at the White. The White House Correspondent's Dinner. I've witnessed this tonight.
B
From the killing.
C
Yeah.
B
From the attempt, you mean?
C
Yeah. And that's. I had to see that. I'm like the entire line of succession was right there and realized that we've put. There's real danger there. We got really lucky there now for a lot of reasons. So now we need to have a more secure. More secure to do these kinds of events. But I don't care about. Just build it. I mean, he won't even be president if it's even finished.
B
Yeah. I mean, concentrate on the big things, the things that really matter. Exactly, is what I'm trying to say here. So there's no truth, right, that you're actually going to switch parties? Because I know Trump has offered you. I mean, you said I would be a shitty Republican.
C
Yeah, yeah, that's. You know, and, you know, if I ever decide to change and I won't, I'll be, you know, have me on and I will announce that. But it's not going to. It's like, you know, I'm a committed Democrat, even though if I vote 93% of the time with the Democrats.
B
Yeah.
C
I thought we were supposed to be a big tent party. So that's. I'm not really sure how I become an issue for any of the Democrats. Just having some different views in these other issues.
B
No, you said, you. Said before you're pro choice, you're pro weed, you're pro gay rights, you're pro labor. You also throw in there. I'm pro ribeye and not bio slop. I don't know why that has to go in there. That sounds like a great Republican to me. But what is your thing with. Look, and by the way, I don't eat fake meat either. I mean, my friends at PETA would love it if I did. But look, I mean, the science is the science. I don't think that stuff is really better for you than organic real meat. Certainly not better for the animal at getting killed, but as far as the science goes. But you actually want to ban that doesn't seem.
C
Yeah, I just think. I mean, as I'm a member of the Agriculture committee and I really stand with our farmers now. And now, of course, we don't want like the factory farm situation. Absolutely opposed to animal cruelty. But for me, if I lived on Mars. Yeah. You know, those kinds of. What's the lab meat would be a great opportunity. But for me right now, like, it's.
B
But you want to ban it? I mean, shouldn't people have the right to eat it?
C
It's like actively. I mean, if people have a chance to prevent that. But overall, for me, I think, you know, someone that's really. I mean, we are just. I thought the really highly. Highly processed food. I mean, that's exactly the essence of that.
B
Yeah, but there's a lot worse highly processed food. I mean, I could go into the supermarket and pick up. Well, we don't want to ban all of that. People have the right to eat what they want, don't they? I mean, don't tell the population of America that they can't eat what they want. You think they're up in arms about shit now, you'll really have a riot on your.
C
Well, I mean, overall, it's not a top priority for me given everything else that's happening right now. So overall, as someone that is a committed Democrat, I find myself isolated by my party as things continue. I'm going to just have play, you know, ball strikes and just.
B
Yeah, okay. Well, you know, I'm your fan because the Democratic Party certainly needs someone to keep them honest. And it's the man in the shorts. Thank you, John. I appreciate it. All right, John Fetterman, he's going to tower over me now. All right, let's panel. Thank you, John. Hello. Hello. How are you? All right. He is a Republican congressman for a couple more months from Texas, author of the best selling book Fortitude and host of the podcast hold these Truths with Dan Crenshaw. Representative Dan Crenshaw. And she's a veteran political strategist, Abing CNEWS Corporation. And former DNC chair Donna Brazile is over here. All right. Okay. So the midterm elections are about six months away and it usually happens. The party out of power does well in the midterm elections. And the party in power right now is historically unpopular, mostly because of what I call the three I's. That would be ice, Iran and inflation. And it seemed only a few weeks ago, maybe months ago, that it would be impossible for the Democrats to lose this election. No way. Well, headline today. Way. There is a way, and it's because of what they do when they don't win. They cheat. I mean, so this is the big story today. Gerrymandering. This has gone nuclear. And Republicans are winning the gerrymander war. We talked about it last week, but a lot has changed since then, as you know. It started with Texas, your state. Trump said, gerrymander, Texas. Okay, so they got like four or five new seats in Texas. California responded and said, okay, we're going to do the same thing. All right, so now this is a terrible road to go down, but at least we're even. Okay? Now, the Supreme Court ruled last week on the Voting Rights Act. Everything is different now. Eight states have new maps now, and five more are planning to Texas, Florida, Ohio, Missouri, North Carolina, they're all now more Republican. These states that had districts that minorities were electing candidates from, Virginia did it on the Democratic side. And the Supreme Court in the state said they can't. So that's a big loss for the Democrats. They're not going to get that to even the score. And Tennessee. Now show the map of the Tennessee. This is really what's going on here. Look at this. They've taken Memphis, a majority black city, and they moved it into three different districts to dilute the vote. Now, I'm going to turn this over to the former chair of the DNC for your commentary, because I'm sure you have a lot to say.
D
Well, first of all, it's always a great honor to be back here in California with Bill and congratulations on the Mark Twain Award.
B
Oh, thank you. Well, I appreciate it.
D
I mean, you know, Bill, I can't keep up with you, baby. Every time I. I go for months, Congressman, without seeing this man, and he makes all kinds of trouble, I have to come back here and clean up his shit.
B
I mean, he begs. He begs. Not really.
D
Talk about a desperate housewife. Come on, baby, bring your own stuff up. But let me just say this, Bill, Let me just say this. The rumors that the Democratic Party is dead, those rumors are as old as Methuselah. We have about 179 days. It's going to be a tough election, no question about it. But you know what? We have a small tailwind. No, I do not like what's going on with redistricting. You know why, Bill? I come from one of those states that all of a sudden the Supreme Court said, well, we don't like partisan gerrymandering? No, we don't like racial gerrymandering. So one out of three voters in Louisiana is a black voter. One out of three. And they're now thinking of eradicating. So that says if people from some parts of Louisiana can represent New Orleans better than the folks who are represent or Baton Rouge, it's wrong, it's immoral, and it's unjustified. Bill, let me just say this. And, and I saw what the congressman tweeted today after Tim Kaine, but here's it. I'm old enough.
B
What do you tweet? I don't know.
D
Well, he's going to have. He's wrong. Well, he's wrong. He's saying, well, the Constitution is. They made it based on. Constitution. They made it based on. They said, well, the voters were already voting when the state. State put this law into place so that the voters can decide. The voters decided in, as you well know, California. The voters decided in Virginia. Politicians should not choose their voters. But I have one broad.
B
Well, they've done it forever. Look, we've never.
D
Don't I know that, bill. The Constitution.
B
1787. 87.
D
I'm gonna give you her 10k more. 1787, the Constitution. When did my family get the right to vote, Bill? 1965. 61 years ago. So my daddy served in war and could not vote for that. My grandparents. My grandmother was 77 when she got the right to vote.
B
Yeah. I'm on your side.
D
Don't you. So we understand. Are you on my side?
E
Yeah, of course.
D
I don't know if you're on the side of the Constitution. You're on the side of democracy. So, Congressman, I will let you describe why you went into Tim Kaine's ass today. He tried to put his entire size 11 in the man's ass.
E
Phrasing, you know, phrasing.
C
I don't.
E
You know. Anyway, he's the last ass I would go into. Cade was. He was making the case that the Supreme Court doesn't know what it's talking about and that they're misreading it. I pointed out that he should. I know reading is time consuming, but you might read the actual case that the Supreme Court wrote. It's very well written. It's very logically written. It's pretty irrefutable. I mean, it was a 10 to 1 vote. They're making the case that simply the constitutional amendment was in itself unconstitutional because of the process they followed. That's what the Supreme Court argued. It was not about the ability to politically gerrymander. Let's start with one principle. Just taking a step back here. Your, Your states can. Can do political redistricting. That's how our constitute our federal constitution is written. If we'd like a better system and we are smarter than the founders, then we can figure out a better way to do that. But it's inherently political. Every state has a different way of doing it. Some have independent commissions or bipartisan commissions. Even those are chosen in a political way, a political process. It will always be political, so just get used to it.
B
Okay.
E
But second, one more thing to point out to say we're winning, Republicans are winning the redistricting war. I think we're catching up. And if I can point to the facts on. Look, let's go to Illinois, you got a 14 to 3 ratio. Washington, you got a 10 to 2 ratio. New England has like a 21 to 0 ratio. California, out of 52 representatives, they're going to have maybe five, six Republicans. You know, in Texas, we're 30 to 10. Florida's now going to be 20 to 7. Like Democrats have been winning this battle for a long time.
B
I'm not sure about that. North Carolina, 10. 4.
D
10 Republicans. 4, 10. 4 Democrats. Ohio, 10 Republicans, 5 Democrats. Texas, 25 Republicans, 13. In a state that is majority minority.
B
Can I just. Okay, let me just show you.
E
Why does skin color, like, automatically impose political beliefs?
D
Because race has always been identified as a political consideration, not only as it relates to the Constitution of the United States, but also how it is implemented at the state level. That's why these districts were always drawn, so that they took race into consideration. So that's my point.
B
Yes, but why.
E
Why should an enlightened society believe that?
B
Because of the history of the United States.
E
Well, there's a history. But as. But as we grow out of that history, which I hope we would have by now, an enlightened society would not say that your skin color, an immutable characteristic, is an indicator of your political perspective.
B
To me, this is always the problem with the Supreme Court. They don't really take into account practical effect. Remember the Citizens United ruling about as much dark money as you want in politics? And Obama was at the State of the Union and he said, this is going to change everything. In Alito mouths. No.
C
Yes, yes.
B
Yes, it did. They don't take this into account, as I said last week. I guess you didn't watch the show.
E
They're not supposed to. No, you wouldn't know that. They're literally not supposed to take that account.
B
I know, but I said we're not living in the future. It would be nice if that was where. And we are way, way, way different than we were 20 years ago, 50 years ago. The world is very different. And I've certainly taken my shit from the left for pointing out constantly that they are hyper focused on race. And when they say things like, racism has never been worse, you're just ridiculous. But we are also not living in the future. Show this map, please. This is what the map could look like in the south of what it used to look like. See those blue. Those are blue districts. This is what it's going to look like now. There are districts that have been carved out so that minorities are represented. For sure. That is racial gerrymandering. It has to happen until we are living in the present, in the future, and we're not. And if you think that you're going to take away all these black representatives in the United States Congress without repercussions, I mean, you take away that many and have them black people have scant representation in Congress, this is not going to stay.
E
And the new governor of Florida is likely going to be black. You know, this is white. Republicans are voting him in.
D
Look, first of all, let me just say this. For most of my childhood, I was represented by a white female, Lindy Boggs. She was outstanding, amazing. And when the moment came in history that she said, you know, I have served my time and this is an opportunity now to expand the electorate, to give more people a seat at the table. Look, we have black representatives, as you well know, who represents largely white. I mean, we had Utah. Utah has had two blacks, not one. They're Republicans. And by the way, if you can elect more black Republicans, go ahead. I'll elect more black Democrats. We got a black Democrat out of Rhode Island. We got a black Democrat in Washington state. Ain't nothing wrong with being black and living in Nebraska or Kansas. That's okay. What I'm saying that in the south, where half the black population reside, we should not be told that we no longer have a seat at the table. We did not. And this is my only view. And Bill, I did watch it. I watched him on Friday night and I went on ABC on Sunday. Hotter than July. So I say, I gotta stop watching Bill. Cause you, you really piped me up, baby. I didn't want to lose my job. You know, you packed me up. I don't know. I said, And by the way, nobody gave us a voting right. We bled for it, okay?
B
All right.
E
Another thing to say about the Supreme Court decision here so that people are actually informed about it, is they. They struck down this idea, and it is a. It's an idea. It's not written in statute.
D
Oh, Lord.
E
It's an idea that there has to be majority minority districts. That, that was not in the Voting Rights Act. There's nowhere in the letter. You're right about the letter interpreted. It's been.
B
You're right about the letter of the law. But you know what? Find a new law. That's why you have a whole new books behind you.
E
Then write a new law. That's the process.
D
We got one. John. John Lewis Bowden. Right. Second. I hope you become a sponsor. We would love your support if, if,
E
if, if the majority of American people want this. And again, again, I, I, I would just.
B
I, well, baby, that's okay.
E
How many, how many kisses? Just one kiss.
D
You don't want my foot. I'm gonna kiss. Look, we support. We need.
E
Make it weird. Make it weird. And by the way, let's make it weird.
D
I'm not weird. There ain't nothing cranky about me, okay?
E
Hello.
D
Unless I'm in the kitchen with my apron on. It covers our things, man. Okay, look, The Voting Rights act ended all kinds of schemes that kept not just blacks, Bill. But poor whites. Think about the poll tax. Think about the literacy test.
E
That's necessary.
D
Absolutely necessary. So it was important that we struck down those laws and those rules so that we could have free and fair elections across the country. I am worried that we are going to be able to go to the south and want to see the SEC play. Oh, we got black athletes, but they have no representation.
B
Where is it?
D
Oh, through the South.
B
Who doesn't?
D
I mean, you're gonna see black athletes playing this fall, throwing for lsu, throwing for Tennessee, Alabama, but no black representation in Congress.
B
Oh, I see what you're saying.
D
That's my point is, you know, I am very disturbed by this. I'm disturbed that we are turning back at a time when America's about to turn 250. I got my red, white and blue gown, baby.
B
You gonna take me to the gown? I mean, again, the letter of the law is written for a perfect world. We don't live in that perfect world. I don't mean to speak for the black population. That's your job. But I'm just channeling.
D
I can't speak for white people either, so you.
B
Okay, I'm just channeling the black folks. I know they like white people more than they used to. Because we are nicer than we used to be. But trust us, no. And I don't blame them. So there's just a lot of black folks who are not gonna. Not quite ready to vote for the white representative. They don't understand their life as. Because we are still a divided country in many ways.
D
Yes, we are.
B
I mean, when my friend Killer Mike puts out an album, I have to read the lyrics. And even then I don't understand it. It's a. No, I'm serious. I'm saying this to make a point. If that's the case, it's as different from English as Chaucer is. And that's just pointing out that we are not quite living in the future.
E
Well, if you want to start living in the future, you have to go back to original principles. And original principles say that immutable characteristics.
B
The original principle was slavery was legal.
E
But your skin color should not be an indication of your character. That's an original principle. That's a foundational liberal principle in a
B
constitution where slavery was legal.
E
And then we fought a war to end it. I know, because of our Declaration of Independence and the values. Those original principles that we stated there, that was used as the argument against slavery by the Republicans.
D
And look, maybe we need another period of enlightenment because I'm going back to all of those theories that gave us this so called great constitution. The Bill of Rights and of course the Declaration of Independence. But let me just say this. As you well know, it took women almost 144 years to get secure the right to vote. And look, we just had to fight once again for a medication that is Safe. Safe the 5th Circuit saying that we should not receive our medication in the mail. It's medication and people keep saying it's an abortion pill. Women need to have full access to the range of reproductive health care. No one should die having a miscarriage.
B
Okay, all right, all right. I have to move on. I have to move on. Very important things. Amazon presents Jeff vs. Taco Truck Salsa. Whether it's verde roja or the orange one. For Jeff, trying any salsa is like playing Russian roulette with a flamethrower. Luckily, Jeff saved with Amazon and stocked up on antacids, ginger tea and milk. Habanero. More like habanero. Yes. Save the everyday with Amazon. Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile with a message for everyone paying big wireless way too much. Please, for the love of everything good in this world, stop with Mint. You can get premium wireless for just $15 a month. Of course, if you enjoy overpaying. No judgments.
E
But that's weird.
B
Okay, one judgment anyway. Give it a try. @mintmobile.com Switch upfront payment of $45 for
A
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B
Let me tell you what this is. A couple of, couple of weeks ago, maybe a month ago, I did a whole editorial about aliens because, you know, the world has changed now. I mean, it used to be the people who were talking about it were not the most serious people in the world and now they are. It is the most serious people. Military people. Two movies. One is a documentary, one is the Spielberg movie that's coming out. They both use the word disclosure in the title. We seem to be at that place. Trump is on board with this. He keeps teasing that we are going to see the files. Well, today was the day they released a lot of the files. Now, some of it is probably nothing. Some of it is interesting that I never heard before. Like the astronauts on the Apollo 17 flight saw things that they were talking about that they thought were strange.
E
I mean, do you think they were really there, though?
B
Oh, I don't know. But what I do know, and don't ask me how we got it, we got a hold of the. Absolutely. We got a hold of the stuff. Some of this hasn't even been released yet. Would you like to hear? This is all about what we don't know about the aliens because. All right, for example. Oh, this so interesting right here. They never washed the anal probe. I, I, What else? Oh, their central computer was once destroyed by the illogic of North Dakota getting two senators. That's, oh, they don't reproduce through physical contact, just like Gen Z. Oh, sometimes after the anal probe they say, now do me. Oh, very interesting. They did build the pyramids and also gave us the Bible, but only as a joke. Oh, they refer to the missing Malaysian airliner as our bad. Oh, this is kind of sad. In the universe, we're considered a shithole planet. I find that. Oh, classic. They have over 27 different genders, five fewer than at NYU. They don't say, take me to your leader. They say, wait, this is your leader? And also they want to know why the Michael movie left out all the stuff about kids. All right, all right. I want to talk about the Met Gala. I have never talked.
E
What I thought you just were.
B
I know the outfits are pretty much what the aliens might have. I'VE never. You wanted proof. There's your proof. I never talked about. Because I. I guess I never really understood it. There was a lot of controversy about it this year, so I'm reading about it. It's actually a charity. You know, some of the people. I mean, this happens every year. The celebrities show up and they're wearing just the most outrageous things. I just thought, oh, they're celebrities. They're fucking nuts. That's what they do. They just. They're weirdos and they're attention whores and they just wear weird shit. I've seen them do it in other places. No, this is actually a charity for the Costume Institute at the Metropolitan Museum of Art. Okay. I didn't.
E
I never got so, like fashion and art.
B
Not like this year, there's a lot of controversy because it was apparently sponsored by Jeff Bezos. Spent $10 million for it and they got very upset about this. The people I call the liberals, in theory. And some people said they weren't going to go. Turned out just about everybody went. And I guess the question I'm asking is for the party that's always talking about money and have kind of made making money evil. Now, I do believe that there should be an upper number that we tax on that you can't have more money than, you know. Some of these people have over $500 billion. That's crazy. But I am the farthest thing from a socialist. I think making money is good. Wanting to be rich is good. That's part of what makes America America. We conform to human nature, which is greedy. But you can't have it both ways. I mean, Beyonce was there. She's wearing. She's wearing a $50 million necklace and the Queen of Kalari Diamond.
D
Wow. I don't even know her.
B
And I say you go, girl.
D
Look, I know her mother, but Beyonce, call me. I think I need to help her. I need to help her. Okay, okay, I need to help her. No, but no, she look fabulous for some reason. She might have rented that shit, Bill, you know, branded.
B
I know they give it to her to wear and I say, good, I'm glad. Everybody should be able to do what they want in America and be as rich as they. Not quite as rich as they want. I take that back.
D
Don't steal my money, though. Don't steal the taxpayers money. I'm sick of that shit right now. Sick of it. Just too many graphic greedy people stealing our money.
B
Well, I was saying this the other week. You know, the problem is that when Bernie Sanders says millionaires and billionaires. It's so outdated. Millionaires. You know that one out of six households in America are millionaires? One out of six. So when you say billionaires and you lump them in. This is what I was complaining about. Please don't say.
D
Don't lower my property value. Not right now, Bernie. I'm a little.
B
But, you know, claiming you don't pay a. I pay a shit ton of taxes.
D
Me, too.
B
It's the super rich who don't pay taxes.
D
In fact, I call my husband. He's a paper man. I pay him. And by the way, Gladys, Miss California just gave me $4 back. I came on your show twice last year and I owed them money. Bill, what the hell's wrong with you? You bringing me out here to pay your taxes?
B
That's not okay.
D
Come on now. No, no, Bill, you're right. And you'll love this. You know, the. I could call the Democratic capitalist. I said because I own my house. I mean, shit, I grew up in poverty. I've earned my money. I've earned the right. I love my nieces and nephews. I've given them everything I can. I want to enjoy the rest of my life.
B
Right, okay.
D
But I also. Here's where Bernie makes. Here's Bernie's point. Bernie believes that we live in two Americas. Two Americas. And it's wrong that one set of Americans can no longer afford the American dream. One set of Americans keep, you know, working harder and having to pay more, and the other set seem like the rules are working for them. So that's Bernie's point. He may not be talking in 21st
B
century, but he's got to update it because millionaires, it's like saying, here's a dime for the phone. Okay? It's a quarter now, and we won't even have those anymore.
E
Well, he's also. I think he's just misrepresenting the truth, so he's got to stop doing that as well. So if we just go from statistics like where does federal revenue come from? Say they're not paying their fair share. Well, the top 1% pays 40% of federal revenue. The bottom 50% pays 3% of federal revenue. Is that fair? Is that proportion fair? This is a subjective question. We actually believe in our country, and we have for a long time that there should be a progressive tax system. It's one of the most progressive, if not the most in the world when you conclude state and local. So the rich. Not even. It's not even that everybody plays their, like a 20%. No, the rich pay a higher percentage in addition to. So the idea that they're just not paying taxes is factually incorrect just by the numbers. So the question is then, like, what is fair? How are we defining it? Or is it just a populist rallying cry to build on resentment that people have?
B
But would you say there should be a upper limit? In other words, if your personal wealth is worth 2% of gross national product, shouldn't we able to cap something on the upper limit? No. A trillion dollars.
E
Why?
B
Why?
E
Where do they do it? Is that a checking account? That money's not a checking account. First of all, they're using that to buy. If we're talking about Elon, because I think that's the only person even comes
B
close to, well, some of.
E
How many companies and amazing things has he started?
B
How many people employed?
E
How many investments has he made? It's not like it's just sitting in a checking account. The guy's working 24 hours a day. Like, you know. And Also, that top 1% is a very fluid group of people, too. It's not the same people. It's somebody. It's usually made up of new people who, like, sold their business, they worked forever to build and finally sold it that year. They lumped into the 1% and they're
D
out the next day. And wealthy Americans can afford accountants that can find those loopholes. They understand how to get tax breaks when they want to move their companies into a state and say, hey, if you, you know, make sure I don't have to pay property taxes for the next 20 years. Look, the system is not working. That's why so many Americans are right now disgruntled. That's why Donald Trump is underwater even on his strongest attributes.
E
That's why we passed the big, beautiful bill, which. Stop your tax increases.
D
Shit. Seriously, you're going to close rural hospitals? You're going to take people off the streets.
E
You put $50 billion into rural hospitals, literally put it into hospitals, and meanwhile,
D
we can't afford health. You just said for average Americans working 65 a year, you can afford it
E
a lot less if you're paying taxes.
B
All right.
D
Thousand dollars more. No. America, the American dream should be affordable for all people. That's my position. I know, and I still like.
E
Health care is expensive because Obamacare made it expensive. It created a market that is. That is completely unviable. You can. I love that you believe narratives, folks. I love it. But it's not. You got. You got to look at the facts. And health Care borrowers. What actually happens in insurance markets?
B
Well, they have health care, but it is true that very often they can't use it because part of that is because the Republicans tried every way they could to rat fuck Obamacare.
E
After a while they didn't even know the Democrats passed it and said, well, we'll read it afterwards. I mean they didn't know it was in it either.
B
Okay. I mean they took out some of the, I mean it was.
E
The only thing that got three legged was zeroing out the, the tax penalties.
D
You don't have a replacement for it. So until you have a replacement, we should keep what is working that keep America healthy and safe.
E
Obviously not working when somebody complains about it.
D
Oh yeah, they're complaining all over the country. And it's not just health insurance. People are worried about their property insurance, they're worried about being able to pay for flood insurance. All of the things.
B
Well then why do you guys want
E
to raise their taxes?
D
We don't want to raise their.
E
Every Democrat voted against our primary bill that we all got elected and we
D
did this first Permanent.
B
Yes, we made taxes first.
D
At the same time you have wars after wars after wars and we cannot pay for it. We're about to raise the defense budget to $1.5 trillion while we bring in new armament and new ammunition and new munitions. But nothing.
E
We're changing the subject.
B
Yeah, let's do that. Let's change the subject.
D
It's the same subject.
B
Wait, wait, wait. I want to change the subject to this subject because I mean the Pentagon budget, they're asking for a $600 billion increase. That is, that is big in an age when we are finding out from the Ukrainian war, it's drones baby. And drones are cheap. So what are we spending?
E
So it's not as crazy as it sounds. One waking up to the fact nobody
B
thought that they could fight Russia to a standstill. I didn't. I thought they were going to lose that war and they did. That is the nature of warfare. The Gatling gun comes along, machine guns come along, planes, tanks. And the offense versus defense changes. And war. We are at that moment now wars are completely being changed by drones. And it seems like we are financing the last war as well as fighting the last one.
E
No, we're not. To make you feel better, we absolutely are investing a lot into drones. Drones of all types, from space down to the bottom of the ocean. Space is the new frontier. China has known this for a while. That space is a warfare domain. We have refused to believe it For a long time. And there's finally investments in that space. So a lot of this money is golden dome. A lot of this, which back in Reagan's days and Star wars, the technology was not there, but now it is. But you got to invest in it and put it up there. One of the reasons I've been in L A all week is visiting all these space companies that are out here because L A has one of the. Just has the ecosystem of labor that works in the space industry. It's flourishing. People like companies like SpaceX have obviously pioneered that. So a lot of investment in that, A lot of investment in paying it forward to save the taxpayer money in the long run. So instead of the stupid way that we often have bought weapons or new munitions, we pay more and more and more later because we tell. We tell companies like, hey, we might buy some later. Right? And so what does that do? It raises the cost of production every time. So no, put a fine, like put an actual amount seven years out. So a lot of it is paying it forward and putting that investment in. Now, AI is another big one that you have to invest in shipbuilding industry as well. So that's, that's the reason for that massive increase. And it's not obvious that it would be to continue to be that.
D
But, Bill, if the problem is, it's like a layer cake while you put on the bottom layer and then we got a top layer and another layer. Well, this is. The bottom layer is going to stay the same, which is about 6, 700 billion dollars, and then we add another 200. I used to work on Capitol Hill and the defense budget. You know, it's like going to a jewelry store and you're like, I like that one, I like that one. I like that one. We need to have a new strategic framing for 21st century wars. And you're absolutely right. We can learn a lot from Ukraine, but we shouldn't keep layering and layering and layering as if the taxpayers can afford this.
B
All right, we have to close it there. Thank you for all your spirited discussion. Time for new rules, everybody. All right, new rule. We should all support the police, but it does have its limits. Like for this officer who was convicted of stripping naked and masturbating in a park. And I would just like to say to him, you keep your hands where we can see them. I would say you're a disgrace to the uniform, but I see you've sidestepped that issue already. Neural Baroness, the longest verifiably measured wild snake in the World better not be lying when it claims to be 23ft 8 inches long. Because if we go on a date and it turns out barrenness is really 23ft 4 inches, I'm gonna be pissed. I said it in my profile. No games, no liars. New rule. The next time a toddler gets stuck inside one of those arcade claw machines, the parents have to buy a couple rolls of quarters and try to win them back. I don't pay thousands of tax dollars to have Fire and Rescue pull your kid out of a box. I pay thousands in tax dollars to have Fire and Rescue pull lost dumbasses off the sides of mountains. New rules since the Met Ball and the Kentucky Derby happen in the same week. Next year, they have to swap outfits. The stupid ridiculous hats that people wear to the I want to see those on Kim Kardashian, Bad Bunny and Doja Cat. And at the Derby, the rednecks who love the animal abuse that is horse racing must come dressed like this. New roll. The winner of the European Seagull Square Screeching Championship must be referred to as the loser. Because anyone can screech like that. There's a homeless guy on Hollywood Boulevard who does it all the time. You want to prove you can actually act like a seagull? Steal a French fry out of my hand while I'm eating it. And finally, new rule. Luigi Mangione Cole, Thomas Allen, Tyler Robinson and the ghost of Thomas Crooks must form a boy band called New Kids on the Glock. Just to. Just to drive home the point, these are not your father's political assassins. Things have changed. For one thing, today's assassins have popular support with the kids. Up to 40% of America's young adults say violence is okay to achieve a political goal. Wow. Seems like 5 minutes ago when one of the big causes of the left was gun control. But now guns are the answer, I guess. Cause Luigi is a fucking rock star. He's the OG Hot assassin. The young assassins coming up even name check him in their manifestos. When this guy was arrested for burning down a giant warehouse, he said it was like when Luigi popped that motherfucker. Before this college student threw a Molotov cocktail at Sam Altman's mansion. He talked about Luigi ing some tech CEOs. And the asshole currently on trial for allegedly starting the big fire out here last year was Luigi's biggest fanboy. Good to see the kids have role models, huh? Another way this new breed of content creator assassin, they have jokes. Cole Allen called himself a friendly federal assassin and Told his friends he was going to D.C. for a personal emergency. Wink, wink. His manifesto opens with, hello, everybody. It sounded like that form letter I get every Christmas telling me how everyone is doing in a family I don't care about. Tyler Robinson wrote little jokes on the bullets he fired at Charlie Kirk. Things like, if you're reading this, you're gay. Lol. I mean, John Wilkes Booth was an asshole, but at least when he did the deed, he said something serious. Sic semper tyrannis, not I fucked your. Cole. Allen took selfies before enacting his diabolically clever plan of running fast. You know, Cole, why do I think this is more about you than the cause? You're running through the metal detector, but maybe you're really chasing clout. Allen wrote that he was consumed by rage thinking about everything this administration has done. Yeah, join the club. Donald Trump is infuriating. I know this personally. That's why whenever I'm around him, I'm so nervous. I need a drink right away. If you're doing that much rage thinking about Trump, you're not really mad at him. You're mad at your life. This is about being 31 and still living with your mom in Torrance. Life was supposed to come out better. This guy went to Caltech, for Christ's sake. He dreamed of being a video game designer, but really was a substitute teacher. Do you think if he'd ever sold actually a video game and got rich, he'd be doing this? Look, I feel for that generation. You guys grew up with the iPhone, which people up, and now AI. No wonder you're always wearing a hoodie in the fetal position. Plus, as long as you can remember, the President has either been dead or this guy. So sympathy for you, yes, but also, it's always been. Sadly, your parents and teachers didn't prepare you for this. So you have no idea how hard or easy you have it. But because you're so entitled, you just assume you have it tougher than anybody ever did. You don't. In fact, your generation lives an historically easy life. You can get sushi or a weighted blanket delivered in hours. You can do your banking sitting on the toilet. They sell weed in a cigarette. In a financial pinch, you can sell pictures of your feet. Your biggest hardship is when the WI fi drops and you have to briefly experience the 20th century. And yet you've convinced yourselves that your current level of discomfort justifies revolutionary violence. Cole Allen's life only sucked by his own unreasonable standards. He wasn't on welfare. He was on LinkedIn. For his assassination attempt, he stayed at the Hilton. If your assassination comes with Hilton honors, rewards, points, Gen Z lives are not that bad. Most of our lives here in America are not how we live right now, in the year we're actually living in, in the country we're actually living in doesn't warrant condoning political violence. I can see it if you live under a truly oppressive regime. Communism, fascism, Catholicism. But that's not where we are now. You're not storming the beaches at Normandy. You're not standing in breadlines. You know, just like our no kings we had here. The protests, they also had them in Iran. But over there, the protesters got shot in the street. And yes, ICE did that too. Twice. The Iranian thugs did it 30,000 times. Have some perspective. Get real. Stop blaming America for all your fuck ups. What this is really about for today's young assassins is when life lets you down and doesn't properly reward you for being the awesome person you're sure you are. There's one big save left. Convince yourself you were meant for a cause bigger than yourself. And for Cole Thomas Allen, it was, I'm fighting Hitler. And I get why that's a tempting thing to cosplay. If Trump is Hitler, then you're Tom Cruise in Valkyrie, nobody trying to take him out. Yeah,
C
I get mistaken for Thompson's a lot.
B
It's a theme show. What can I say? But Trump isn't Hitler and you're not Tom Cruise. And you don't really live on the desert moon of an evil empire. You live in Torrance, which I understand is not exactly LA or London, but please, you're not in Haiti or Afghanistan. You're at Coachella. Life doesn't really suck so bad. You would just rather be a martyr than a nobody. The whole tone of Cole Allen's manifesto was, sorry, guys, but America needs me. A hero has risen. You're not a hero. You're just the guy who runs out into the field during a baseball game to get attention and in 10 seconds gets tackled by security. Except in your case. No, that's exactly your case. All right, that's our show. I want to thank Representative Dan Crenshaw down of Brazil and Senator John Fetterman Club Random Every Monday on YouTube or listen wherever you get your podcast now, go watch Overtime on YouTube. Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen. Okay,
A
catch all new episodes of Real Time with Bill every Friday night at 10 or watch him anytime on HBO on Demand. For more information, log on to hbo.
D
Com.
This lively episode centers on America's rapidly shifting political landscape ahead of the 2026 midterm elections. Bill Maher and guests—Senator John Fetterman (D-PA), Rep. Dan Crenshaw (R-TX), and former DNC chair Donna Brazile—debate party identity, ideological polarization, the new face of political violence, wealth inequality, gerrymandering, race, and the defense budget, all shot through with Maher's trademark irreverence.
[07:10 – 16:37]
Notable Moment:
Fetterman recounts witnessing a recent assassination attempt at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner, highlighting concerns about security at political events. [13:08]
[16:37 – 32:33]
Notable Quote:
“Nobody gave us a voting right. We bled for it, okay?” — Donna Brazile [28:05]
[37:30 – 44:27]
Notable Moment:
Lighthearted banter between Brazile and Maher about taxes and property values, emphasizing the real-life impact of tax debates. [39:17 – 40:29]
[44:27 – 47:53]
[47:53 – End]
On the Democratic Party shifting left:
“When your values haven't changed, but the party really has changed… it's kind of put you at odds.” — John Fetterman [07:34]
On the normalization of extreme left ideology:
“What really was a dirty word, which isn't anymore, is communism.” — Bill Maher [10:17]
On racial representation in Congress:
“We should not be told that we no longer have a seat at the table. ... Nobody gave us a voting right. We bled for it, okay?” — Donna Brazile [27:00, 28:05]
On ultra-wealth and taxes:
"Top 1% pays 40% of federal revenue. The bottom 50% pays 3%. Is that fair?" — Dan Crenshaw [41:03]
On political violence as performance:
"If your assassination comes with Hilton Honors rewards points, Gen Z lives are not that bad." — Bill Maher [58:09]
| Timestamp | Moment/Quote | Speaker | |-------------|--------------------------------------|-------------------| | [07:34] | “When your values haven't changed…” | Fetterman | | [13:08] | Fetterman recounts witnessing WH shooting | Fetterman | | [21:48] | "When did my family get the right to vote?" | Brazile | | [26:34] | “If you think you’re going to take away…” | Maher | | [28:05] | “Nobody gave us a voting right. We bled for it, okay?” | Brazile | | [41:03] | “Top 1% pays 40% of federal revenue…” | Crenshaw | | [45:28] | “Wars are completely being changed by drones.” | Maher | | [47:53] | “Today’s assassins have popular support with the kids…” | Maher | | [58:09] | “If your assassination comes with Hilton Honors…” | Maher |
This episode is a microcosm of the 2026 American zeitgeist: animated, divided, occasionally hopeful, and always darkly funny. Through robust debate and witty asides, Maher and his guests dissect the erosion of ideological guardrails, the raw wounds of race and class, the anxiety of generational change, and the frightening allure of violence-as-content. While their perspectives frequently diverge, all three panelists converge on the urgency of facing these challenges honestly and head-on.