Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky

Guest: Grace Van Patten

Release Date: November 18, 2025
Podcast Host: Monica Lewinsky
Episode Theme:
This episode delves into reclaiming one’s inner child and self after public scrutiny, the challenges and responsibilities of portraying real people on screen, and finding authentic expression in both art and everyday life. Actress Grace Van Patten joins Monica Lewinsky to discuss her experiences playing Amanda Knox in the Hulu series "The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox," her upbringing in a Hollywood family, the complexities of fame and relationships, and the power of vulnerability and self-acceptance.

Main Discussion Themes

1. Reclaiming the Inner Child

• Introduction to the Theme:
  • [00:21] Grace shares her ongoing mission to reclaim her inner child—through art, positivity, and connecting with people.
  • "I feel like I'm on a constant mission to reclaim my inner child. ...the most valuable part...is the lack of self-consciousness, which is so...hard...to achieve." — Grace Van Patten (41:52)
• Importance in Acting:
  • Grace discusses how shedding self-consciousness is key to her acting approach, allowing her to be fearless in her performances.
• Influence from Family:
  • Seeing her younger sister experience life reignited Grace's desire to access joy and trust, elements she seeks to bring into her adult life and work.
  • "Seeing how magic life was to her really inspired me...being so inspired by her unself-consciousness and trust." — Grace Van Patten (57:09)

2. Portraying Amanda Knox: Pressure, Preparation & Responsibility

• The Weight of Playing a Real Person:
  • Grace shares the pressure she felt embodying Amanda Knox—a story familiar to her only through the media as a teen.
  • "I'd never played a real person before. ... It definitely came with a duty to do justice to the story and to Amanda." — Grace Van Patten (11:07)
• Process and Preparation:
  • Learning Italian for the role, navigating scenes shot out of order, and striving for authenticity.
  • Monica notes the support network built around Grace on set due to the story’s heaviness.
  • "It was so important to everyone that you feel...safe and...comfortable in all the ways." — Monica Lewinsky (09:22)
• Connecting With Amanda:
  • The shocking lack of evidence in Knox’s real case deeply affected Grace’s portrayal.
  • "I knew there was no evidence...but I didn't know there was zero evidence. That is so crazy to me." — Grace Van Patten (13:15)
• Maintaining Emotional Health:
  • Rituals for coming back to herself between scenes included stretching and swimming laps—unique to that role and time.

3. Resilience and Positivity Amid Public Scrutiny

• Learning From Amanda and Monica:
  • Grace finds inspiration in how both Amanda Knox and Monica Lewinsky remain hopeful and positive after intense public scrutiny.
  • "You both are so extremely strong and confident women and did not let this bad thing...defeat you. ... That was the most inspiring thing I got out of the whole thing." — Grace Van Patten (13:37)
• Empathy as a Motif:
  • Discussing the innate empathy among women watching other women experience scandals.
  • "So many women...were impacted by how they saw their own sexuality, what it meant to be a young woman growing up." — Monica Lewinsky (06:10)

4. Celebrity, Family, and Finding Pathways

• Hollywood Upbringing:
  • Growing up in a family of actors and directors, Grace explains the push-pull between family legacy and forging her own path.
  • She attended LaGuardia "Fame" high school, choosing acting over other interests like marine biology.
• Parental Guidance:
  • Her family emphasized only pursuing acting out of true love for the craft.
  • "You only do this if you really fucking love it.” — Advice from Grace's father (23:17)

5. Artistic Process & Authentic Expression

• Acting Methodology:
  • Grace describes a flexible, role-specific approach rather than hardline method acting (“not even close to Daniel Day-Lewis”).
  • Builds character through imagining their world, mood, and context, especially when portraying real people.
  • "If you really try, you can connect to anybody in some way. To find those common grounds...those traits were bumped up a lot while playing [Amanda]." — Grace Van Patten (27:59)
• Grace's Approach to Embarrassment:
  • She sees feeling embarrassed as a vital sign she is on the right track as an actor.
  • "I think it's important to feel embarrassed in the process...I felt embarrassed so much playing Amanda, but I knew I was doing it right." — Grace Van Patten (42:59)

6. Relationships and Public Perception

• Dating in the Spotlight:
  • Grace discusses her real-life relationship with "Tell Me Lies" co-star Jackson White and the intense reactions from fans.
  • Parasocial dynamics blur the lines:
    • “It’s pretty funny...fans...think we are our characters. The fans are really visceral about it.” — Grace Van Patten (35:43)
  • Navigating privacy as a public couple while valuing authenticity in real life.

7. Evolving Cultural Attitudes Toward Women, Power, and Media

• Intergenerational Perspectives:
  • The discussion touches on how women’s scandals are processed differently by various generations—from boomers' “just deal with it” to Gen Z's “of course it should change.”
    • "Women are going into relationships knowing what they deserve and don't deserve. There's an empowerment..." — Grace Van Patten (47:05)
• Impact of Social Media:
  • Grace and Monica agree that scandals today would unfold differently, with faster cycles and more opportunities for both support and harm thanks to social media.
  • "Scandals would be shorter. ... There would be a lot more voices of support." — Monica Lewinsky (51:55)
• Responsibility in Storytelling:
  • Monica highlights the importance of retelling stories with compassion and depth to shift public discourse, challenge harmful narratives, and affect real-world outcomes (e.g., jury bias).

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Reclaiming Innocence and Joy
  "I'm always on a mission to reclaim my inner child. ... Reminding myself to tap into that as much as I can."
  — Grace Van Patten [56:47]

• On Navigating Roles:
  "I approach every role kind of differently... combining Amanda and bringing myself, like you were saying, like, bring my own emotional truth to it, while still honoring her essence..."
  — Grace Van Patten [26:07]

• On the Need for Authenticity:
  "There needs to be more...acceptance—it shouldn't be embarrassing to have [notes] in front of you. ... Just normalize having your safety little things."
  — Grace Van Patten & Monica Lewinsky [34:01]

• On Women & Empathy Through Scandal:
  "As a woman, watching another woman go through something... it's just an innate woman empathy... You see a woman going through something, and you think...how unimaginable that would be if it was me."
  — Grace Van Patten [07:38]

• On the Lasting Impact of Storytelling:
  "People who watch this show may be sitting on a jury one day, and it may make them...look at something a little more critically. The ripple effect of that is really interesting to me."
  — Monica Lewinsky [54:59]

• On Generational Shifts:
  "Women are...knowing what they deserve and don't deserve. There's an empowerment to having that line...a little thicker..."
  — Grace Van Patten [47:05]

Key Timestamps

• 00:21 – Grace introduces her theme of reclaiming her inner child
• 03:19–04:04 – Grace describes the anxiety and responsibility she felt playing Amanda Knox
• 06:10–08:03 – Discussion of women's experiences in the public eye and empathy
• 09:33–12:01 – On the rarity of feeling genuinely "held" on set and the weight of Amanda Knox's story
• 13:05–14:16 – Shocking elements of the Amanda Knox case and present-day positivity
• 20:44–23:11 – Grace’s family, Hollywood background, and parental advice on pursuing acting
• 27:47–29:53 – Approaching roles: blending self and character, acting as connection
• 32:30–34:39 – Monica and Grace on public speaking, performance, and the value of preparation
• 35:43–37:49 – Navigating public attention as a young actor couple
• 41:52–44:39 – Strategies for acting fearlessly and reclaiming authenticity
• 46:33–49:32 – Shifting conversations around relationships, #MeToo, and women's empowerment
• 49:32–53:39 – How stories and scandals might play out differently today
• 56:47–59:46 – Grace’s final thoughts on reclaiming her inner child and building trust

Topics for Listeners to Explore Further

• The unique pressures of dramatizing real-life events, especially those involving recent and still-public figures
• How public perceptions of women in scandal have changed over the past two decades
• The links between vulnerability, preparation, and public performance
• Navigating personal identity alongside professional and public personas
• The power of restorative storytelling to change narratives and even affect institutional outcomes (e.g., legal system biases)

Overall Tone & Style

The episode is candid, supportive, introspective, and warmly humorous. Monica Lewinsky creates a safe space for honest exploration; Grace Van Patten responds with openness about insecurities, ambition, joy, and personal growth. Their rapport invites listeners into a space of empathy, resilience, and self-discovery—perfect for anyone interested in the intersections of fame, justice, creativity, and reclaiming self.