“I accept my mom for who she is, not for who I wish she had been…”

For so many immigrant daughters, love and guilt are woven together. We grow up hearing about sacrifice, survival, and “everything we did for you” — while quietly carrying our own shame, anger, and longing to be truly seen.

In this powerful conversation, Dr. Payal Beri sits down with Serena, author of Unbound: The Story of an Immigrant, to explore what it really means to honor your parents’ story without abandoning yourself.

They talk about growing up Asian in the West, the unspoken rules in immigrant homes, and the moment Serena realized she had to stop waiting for her mother to become someone else — and instead ask, “What is she here to teach me?”

From mother–daughter wounds and intergenerational fear to building a “bridge” strong enough for parents, kids, and future generations to stand on together, this episode is an invitation to become unbound in your own life.

If you’ve ever felt torn between loyalty to your family and loyalty to yourself, this conversation is for you.

🔍 In This Episode, We Talk About:

Accepting parents “as they are” vs who we wish they had been
The unique guilt and pressure on kids of immigrants
Growing up Asian in Canada and living between cultures
Mother–daughter dynamics, anger, and the grief of what you didn’t get
Reframing: “What is she here to teach you?”
Why survival mode leaves little room for feelings or therapy
“Airing dirty laundry” vs telling the truth with love
How shame and silence create a gap between generations
Building a bridge between our parents’ traditions and our own lives
Hyper-independence, money, and the myth of “I can do it all alone”
Finding the middle ground: empowered and in relationship

Connect with our Guest, Serena

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/serena_arora/

Buy the Book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FQ381KK1?ref_=pe_93986420_775043100

Connect with Dr. Payal Beri & Reframing Perspectives:

Instagram – Dr. Payal: https://www.instagram.com/dr.payalberi
Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@payalberi?sub_confirmation=1
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/payalberi
Speaking & Media: https://www.drpayalberi.com

I Accept My Mom As She Is: Breaking Cycles as an Immigrant Daughter