Anal Sex, Wet Dreams, Sweaty Genitals - Here's What You Should Know | AMA

Summary

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Podcast Summary

Rena Malik, MD Podcast

Episode: Anal Sex, Wet Dreams, Sweaty Genitals – Here's What You Should Know | AMA
Date: December 5, 2025
Host: Dr. Rena Malik, MD

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Episode Overview

This candid, science-based episode features Dr. Rena Malik answering listener-submitted questions about sexual health in an "Ask Me Anything" format. Dr. Malik, a board-certified urologist and pelvic surgeon, addresses sensitive topics including preparation and safety for anal sex, understanding wet dreams in teenagers, and managing sweaty or odorous genitals. Her responses provide both medical context and practical advice, aiming to remove stigma and empower listeners with evidence-based insights.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Anal Sex: Curiosity, Consent, and Preparation

Listener Question: "My husband has asked me to have anal sex many times...I'm scared to try it. How should I prepare myself and find ways to relax?"
— [01:36]

Dr. Malik’s Guidance

• Personal Readiness and Consent:
  • "You want to try because your partner wants to, but you should also make sure that you’re curious and interested in doing it. You don’t want to do it under duress." — [01:56]
• Why It Can Be Pleasurable:
  • The anus is filled with nerve endings; stimulation can enhance pleasure.
• Safety Precautions:
  • Start with something small (well-lubricated finger, small anal toy).
    • "Always use toys that are designed for anal play...Don’t use a household object or anything like that." — [02:24]
    • Medical warning about foreign objects and ER visits due to lost items.
    • Use toys with a flared base or a handle to prevent accidents.
  • Progressively work up to larger objects, matching partner’s girth.
• Techniques for Comfort:
  • Go slow, prioritize communication, and stop if it’s not enjoyable or comfortable.
  • Use Plenty of Lubrication: The anus isn’t self-lubricating, so lube is essential to prevent injury and discomfort.
• Attitude:
  • "Sex is supposed to be fun...If you want to explore different parts of your body, by all means, you should do it safely, do it consensually, and use lots of lubricant." — [03:44]

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2. Wet Dreams / Nocturnal Emissions in Teenage Boys

Listener Question: "My teenage son has stains on his boxers...He says he wakes up like this, sounds like a wet dream. Is this something that we can stop or control?"
— [04:06]

Dr. Malik’s Response

• Normal Physiological Function:
  • "Wet dreams, or nocturnal emissions, are very normal. In fact, most guys will have nocturnal emissions." — [04:36]
  • Possible causes: friction in bed, reflexogenic erections (three to five times/night), bladder fullness leading to a reflex.
• Hormonal Context:
  • Common in adolescence due to high testosterone.
  • Also happens with prolonged abstinence.
• Communicating with Children:
  • Importance of discussing it before it happens to prevent fear or shame.
  • "It can be really alarming for a young boy to wake up and find himself covered in ejaculate..." — [05:04]
• Medical Reassurance:
  • The body either releases or reabsorbs ejaculate—both are healthy.
  • "This is a normal and healthy part of growing up." — [05:50]

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3. Dealing with Sweaty or Odorous Genitals

Listener Question: "Girl, I get sweaty down there...What can I do to stay dry and not sweat so much?"
— [06:08]

Dr. Malik’s Suggestions

• Normalize the Issue:
  • "It’s a real problem. People do get sweaty in their genitals, men and women." — [06:25]
• Practical Tips:
  • Wear cotton underwear for moisture-wicking properties.
  • Use powders formulated for genitals; safe options include cornstarch or new baby powders (made with cornstarch).
    • Caution: Avoid talcum powder due to links with certain cancers.
  • Some creams or “ball powders” are available commercially.
  • More in-depth information is available on Dr. Malik’s YouTube channel.
• Proper Hygiene:
  • For females, use soapy water for the external, hair-bearing area only.
    • "The vagina is a self-cleaning oven...as long as you’re cleaning the hair-bearing areas, then everything else will clean itself." — [07:38]
  • Avoid “aggressive washing,” douching, or inserting water into the vagina.
• Addressing Odor:
  • Causes of odor variation: hormones, foods (coffee, asparagus).
  • Advice: Stay hydrated, maintain a balanced diet, support a healthy microbiome.
  • "You’re supposed to have a smell. Everyone is supposed to have a distinct, unique smell. It’s not a bad smell." — [08:30]
• When to Seek Care:
  • If odor is suddenly fishy, changes abruptly, or is accompanied by colored discharge, see a doctor for infection screening.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "Always use toys that are designed for anal play...I can't tell you the number of people who show up in the ER with things that have gotten sucked up into the rectum." — Dr. Rena Malik [02:24]

• "It can be really alarming for a young boy to wake up and find himself covered in ejaculate and doesn’t know what happened and feels like he did something wrong." — Dr. Rena Malik [05:04]

• "The vagina is a self-cleaning oven." — Dr. Rena Malik [07:38]

• "You’re supposed to have a smell. Everyone is supposed to have a distinct unique smell. It’s not a bad smell." — Dr. Rena Malik [08:30]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [01:36] — Anal sex: readiness, consent, and how to prepare
• [04:06] — Wet dreams explained: normal physiology and parent guidance
• [06:08] — Sweaty/odorous genitals: hygiene, products, and when to see a doctor

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Tone & Language

Dr. Malik’s style is warm, supportive, nonjudgmental, and practical. She blends clinical authority with relatability—often using humor and real-world examples to ease embarrassment and empower her audience.

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Takeaways

• Sex and bodily functions are normal, healthy parts of human life.
• Prioritize communication, consent, and safety in all sexual activities.
• Most intimate health concerns are common and can be managed with simple, evidence-based strategies.
• When in doubt about symptoms or sudden changes, seek professional medical advice.

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Transcript

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[Dr. Rena Malik]

Times welcome back to The Rena Malik, M.D. podcast, your source for evidence based information about your sexual health and more. I'm Dr. Rena Malik, urologist and pelvic surgeon, and welcome back to our monthly Ask Me Anything. These are questions taken from our premium subscribers who ask us questions that we answer in a full length video and audio for our podcast. We only share half of it for free and if you want to get the whole episode, make sure to sign up for the [e-mail] there. You will also get access to Ask Me Anything early episodes of the podcast as well as transcripts. Now, without further ado, let's get into it.

[Podcast Listener / Question Asker]

All right, first question My husband has asked me to have anal sex many times. I keep saying no. My sister says she enjoys it, but outside of her, I don't know many women that do this. I don't know if I would like it too, but just too scared to try it. How should I prepare myself and find ways to relax?

[Dr. Rena Malik]

Okay, so one of course I think you want to try because your partner wants to, but you should also make sure that you're curious and interested in doing it. You don't want to do it under duress, right? Anal sex can be very pleasurable and the reason being is that the anus is right behind all those very sensitive organs and there's lots of nerve endings right in the front of the rectum and so when you're filling that area it can sort of enhance your pleasure. But you should not just have anal sex without any preparation. What that means is that one, obviously, that you are both consistent, consenting adults. And that first off, if you've never had anything in the anus, you want to start with something small, like maybe a well, lubricated finger or a small butt plug or some sort of toy. Always use toys that are designed for anal play. Don't use a household object or anything like that. I can't tell you the number of people who show up in the ER with things that have gotten sucked up into the rectum, because there is a little bit of a sort of suction component that can happen when you put a device in there, and then you have to have someone get it out for you, either with a colonoscopy or with surgery. And so that's certainly not a trip you want to take to the air. So always use toys that are made for the anus that have some sort of flared base, that have a handle that you can get it out. And then you can progressively sort of work your way up until you reach the girth of your partner's phallus. And whenever you're putting anything in the anus, you want to make sure that you go slow, you take it easy, and you see how you. You feel. Right. I think a lot of people find it pleasurable, but it does require sort of this preparation and being open to it. Of course, if you don't enjoy it, you should always just stop and not proceed. But again, I think it's a great way to explore. Sex is supposed to be fun. If you want to explore different parts of your body, by all means, you should do it safely, do it consensually, and use lots of lubricant. The anus and the rectum are not naturally lubricated, so if you put things in there without lubrication, you risk causing injury, and then you can have bleeding and other issues. So always use lubrication, always go slow, always communicate, and have fun.

[Podcast Listener / Question Asker]

All right, next question. I was doing laundry and noticed that my teenage son had stains on his boxers. This is not the first time that I've noticed this. My suspicion is he's masturbating, which I completely get, given he's a growing teenage boy. And I'm not trying to humiliate him, but when I ask him, he says he wakes up like this, and it sounds like a wet dream the way he's describing it. Is this something that we can stop or control?

[Dr. Rena Malik]

Yeah, great question. So wet dreams, or nocturnal emissions is the scientific term for it, are very normal. In fact, most guys will have nocturnal emissions and there's a few reasons this happened. You know, one is that there is obviously potentially some friction in the bed that can cause a reflexogenic ejaculation. As we've discussed in the past, men will get three to five nighttime erections throughout the night. And these are reflexes. They're not necessarily due to erotic dreams or anything like that. And so that's one theory. Another theory is that when the bladder gets full, this causes some nerve responses to allow that reflex to happen. But ultimately, having nocturnal emissions is normal. And it happens to many, many young men. In fact, I encourage parents to talk to their kids about this before it happens because it can be really alarming for young boy to wake up and find himself covered in ejaculate and doesn't know what happened and feels like he did something wrong. I'm glad you're asking this question because it's. It's completely normal. He should have nothing to be embarrassed about. Obviously it happens a lot when kids are younger because their testosterone is really high after they go through puberty. But also when people abstain from ejaculation for long periods of time, they can often have a nocturnal emission as well. Your body just releases what either it either releases externally or your body reabsorbs it. So again, completely normal, nothing to worry about. Tell your child that they shouldn't be worried and that this is a normal and healthy part of growing up.

[Podcast Listener / Question Asker]

Girl.

With many Rs, girl, I get sweaty down there. I want to smell good and not feel like there's a swamp in my pants. What can I do to stay dry and not sweat so much? So it's a real problem. People do get sweaty.

[Dr. Rena Malik]

Yeah, absolutely. It's a real problem. I was laughing at the girl part, not at the sweaty part. I think that what's really important here is to one, acknowledge that, yes, people do get sweaty in their genitals, men and women. So what can you do? So first and foremost, what are you wearing? You always want to be wearing cotton underwear because it will wick away the moisture to some degree and it won't create an environment where that moisture is like going to sort of stick around. So one is wear cotton underwear. If you're wearing a different type of underwear, it usually has cotton around the area where the genitals are. Two is you can use different types of powders to sort of wick away the moisture. And there's actually specifically designed, like ball powders that you can find, but you can also, and even creams. And I've made A video on that on my YouTube channel if you want to check it out. But you can also use basic cornstarch or baby powder which is now made with cornstarch and that is safe. Now, talcum powder, which was previously used is actually has some linkage with testicular cancer, potentially ovarian cancer. And so we don't recommend that. But cornstarch is totally safe and easy to use and can help sort of wick away that moisture. Now what I really want people to know is how do you wash your vulva if you're a female, I want you to use soapy water around the hair bearing area and let it just run down. I don't want any aggressive washing or douching or getting the shower head and putting it in between your legs and letting all that water go up into the vagina. That's not necessary. The vagina is a self cleaning oven. And so as long as you're cleaning the hair bearing areas, which is what makes the skin smell, then everything else will clean itself and overall just sort of maintaining normal, good, healthy behaviors. Right? So sometimes people will notice that their odor changes and it can change over the course of the month because your hormones change over the course of the month. But the other thing is to realize, like if you are drinking a lot of coffee or you're having a lot of asparagus, those things will affect the scent of your body fluids. So generally just stay hydrated, drink amount of water, have good fruits and vegetables and your overall healthy microbiome will take over and keep your odors the way they're supposed to be. You're supposed to have a smell. Everyone is supposed to have a distinct unique smell. It's not a bad smell. Now if it starts smelling fishy or it's a abrupt change or there's a change in the color of the discharge, make sure to see your gynecologist immediately, your primary care doctor to get evaluated. Make sure you don't have any bacterial vaginosis or other sexually transmitted infection. Thank you guys so much for joining us on today's episode of the ama. If you guys want to hear the rest of this episode, make sure to check out renamelic.supercast.com and sign up for their premium membership. And at as always, you want to take care of yourself because you're worth it.

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