A (45:09)
Right then what happened for that is I had done all the paperwork and then they pivoted the creative. But then Brian Hart was having some issues and they weren't sure if he was going to be able to actually film for the clique. So they flew me out anyway and I was sequestered for the week and I hung out there and so that was a close call that I had of being on the show. And then I was in the mix for the coaches. But even that it's big brother 14 and that was the last time that I ever heard a word from production. Yeah, there was no Big Brother 18 availability check. There was. There is no there. There was. And this is actually a story I will have to tell you guys off a line. But there was an interesting story around the time of Big Brother All Stars 2 that came up, but I was not contacted and not invited for it. And so I was completely flabbergasted to receive this phone call. As shocked as the viewers were to see me there, was as shocked as I was to get this message. I was just astonished. And I really didn't know if I should laugh or cry or what my emotions should be about it. And it was so. So I'm immediately. They do not say what this is going to be in reference to at first. So I'm immediately thinking like, huh, There was not a lot of Jewish representation on rain Gear Games 1. You know, maybe they want me to do some bad menorah. Puns. Yeah, you know, we were. Yes, maybe. Right. You know, I figured they thought they needed some new lines, you know, so that was. That was kind of my immediate, like first thought reaction and then was like, maybe they like actually need me to consult on like a format question. And then I was like, they would not call me and ask me that. Like, they do not want my help with that. I was like, so what the hell is this going to be? And when they told me, I knew I had to do it because it's a real personification of my actual feelings. And it seems so off brand for the show to. After all these years of doing everything they can. I mean, let's call a spade a spade. The mastermind twist is here to lay blame on us and take blame away from production to distract people, people about the most recent person who was left in the wake of their twist. So for them to openly self own themselves and acknowledge on camera the truth of what they did to me, it sounded too hilarious and too true to pass up. And I thought it was going to be cathartic for me. And I thought, this is a better chapter to end on. I'm gonna show up and have a great laugh and it's gonna be good times. But the second that I stepped foot onto the lot, that was not the emotion that came over me. I was pissed. I was immediately, oh, really? You know what? I really was screwed by this. They handed me the script. I read through it again. I said, what this? I had this conversation with Rob and Taryn before. This is not a script. This is my actual feelings. And Jesse and Frankie, they were definitely screwed. They were definitely on a potential path to winning. But they've had many, many, many, many more opportunities since that time. And it seemed like they had reconciled their emotions. Yes. When we talked about it in the moment, they were said, yeah, you know, I could have turned out differently or they got me. I was sitting in the dressing room and I was like, mother, you know, I can't believe I am here now. What am I? You know, I started really questioning my own choices, my own decision. I was going through it. And then to get to the sanctum, we had to go through the house. So we were in the living room and we were in the kitchen. And it was surreal. I mean, Frankie had just been there for Reindeer Games. Jesse's been there dozens and dozens of times. Frankie also hosted on 25. But when I was even back for even BB9, I was in the backyard. When I was there for BB11, I was behind the walls. This was my first time stepping foot into the house in 18 years and it felt like 500 lifetimes ago. And it also felt like it was 20 minutes ago. And I, you know, the, the first thing that came over me was like I kind of felt like I wanted to play. You know, I really did. And I had long thought I would, over my dead body would I go for 100 days away from my family just to get screwed again. Like unfortunately happened to Rachel. And you know, this summer I've been talking to Brendan non stop as you guys have been and I give her so, so, so much credit to because she loves this so much that she went and played in a situation that was going to always be a difficult situation for her and left her family and did it. I do not think, or I did not think that I had that in me. I stepped foot onto the thing and I thought to myself, these people are idiots. I would run circles around them and more than anything the producers owe me one. And this is not it. Today is not that day. My three minute Mastermind segment. This does not make us even until they hand me, well, it was $500,000 but until they hand me that money, we are not even. Because as we have discussed, I believe we talked about this on the Taryn show specifically, if we played out Big Brother 8 without America's player 1000 times, I think I probably would have won 999 of them. And I have never felt more honestly sincere about something in my entire life. And as soon as I stepped foot there, I, I swear to God I made final twos with each of Frankie and Jesse separately. I said if this leads to a legend season or a second chance. And guys, I'm so glad it was you here today. We'll run this shit right to the end. Me and you.