Rich Habits Podcast
Episode 158: Why You Feel Behind Financially
Hosts: Austin Hankwitz & Robert Croak
Date: February 23, 2026

Episode Overview

In this episode, Austin and Robert explore a widespread phenomenon: the persistent feeling of being “behind” financially, even when the actual data suggests otherwise. The conversation centers on why so many people, including those objectively doing well, still experience financial insecurity. They break down the core psychological and societal factors—such as skewed benchmarks, survivorship bias, and misleading comparisons—that distort financial self-assessment. The hosts aim to separate perception from reality, offering listeners not only stats and mindsets but actionable steps toward healthier financial habits.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Why Do People Feel Behind Financially? (01:45)

• Three Core Reasons Identified:
  • Skewed benchmarks
  • Survivorship bias
  • Lack of honesty about financial realities, both socially and personally

“Feeling behind and actually being behind are two completely different things. But we treat them like they're the same and they cause real damage to the mindset.”
— Robert (01:57)

2. The Benchmark Problem: Skewed Comparisons & Social Media (02:37)

• Social Media Alters Reality:
  • Comparison is no longer local—now global, relentless, and curated
  • Online highlight reels conceal debt, risks, and the true cost of apparent success

“You're comparing your full reality to someone else's carefully curated illusion. And this causes real problems.”
— Robert (03:57)

• Emotional Consequences:
  • Leads to rash financial decisions, e.g., changing jobs for money, risky investments, lifestyle inflation for outward appearances
  • Data: 43% of Gen Z and 41% of Millennials feel behind, yet median net worths show many are on track

“All of that stress, all of that emotion is caused by a headline of some 23-year-old tech guru on LinkedIn selling their startup for half a billion dollars to Google.”
— Austin (05:36)

3. Survivorship Bias: Only Success Stories Are Visible (06:30)

• “Winner” Narratives Dominate:
  • Public discourse exaggerates exceptional success while erasing the majority who struggle
  • Average financial progress is normal, but invisible

“Success looks common when it's actually very rare.”
— Robert (07:27)

4. The Reality Check: Benchmarking Yourself with Real Data (07:44)

• Federal Reserve Median Net Worths (2022):

  • Under 35: $39,000
  • 35–44: $135,000
  • 45–54: $247,000
  • 55–64: $364,000

• Key Stat: 30% of Americans have a negative net worth.

• Majority (73%) feel they're doing “okay” or “comfortable," yet headlines and social media amplify the negatives and outliers.

“If you're a 30-year-old human being in the United States with $40,000 to your name, you are by definition above the median. You don't need to feel like you're behind financially.”
— Austin (08:40)

5. The Feeling-Reality Disconnect (10:32)

• Living Paycheck to Paycheck Isn’t Always “Failure”:

  • Many max savings despite tight budgets (e.g., Roth IRA)
  • 72% of young adults actively improving finances

• Practical Advice:

  • Focus on debts, savings, and income over time
  • Measure what you control, not comparisons or market variables

“Feeling behind financially and actually being behind financially are not the same thing. And most people feel behind not because they're failing, but because they're using the wrong benchmarks.”
— Austin (14:07)

6. The Three Major Illusions That Skew Perception (14:30)

• Social media highlight reels
• Survivorship bias in success stories
• Negative, click-driven headlines

“When you put these three things together… you get this warped perception where it feels like everyone else is either crushing it financially or completely broke, and there's no in between.”
— Austin (15:48)

7. What To Do: Steps to Reclaim Financial Perspective (16:45)

• Question the Benchmark:

  • Ask: Behind what? Behind who? Is this comparison even realistic?

• Acknowledge Survivorship Bias:

  • For every success, countless failures go unmentioned

• Get Grounded in Your Own Data:

  • Review your real numbers honestly
  • Track if debts are dropping, savings are rising, and income is on a positive trajectory

“You have to focus on what you can control. And you can control your savings, you can control reducing debt. You can control your skills to make more in your career.”
— Austin (16:56)

8. Mindset Reminders & Motivation (19:09)

“The sooner you realize that you are exactly where you need to be in your life, the better off you're going to be.”
— Austin (19:44)

“Don't worry about the White House, worry about your house.”
— Austin (19:53)

• Personal finance is personal—progress looks different for everyone
• Stop worrying about highlight reels and focus on your own “rich habits”

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Success looks common when it’s actually very rare.” — Robert (07:27)
• “Data is not the problem, the comparison is the problem.” — Paraphrased by Austin and Robert throughout
• “Facts are our friends.” — Austin (Recurs frequently)
• “You can only control the controllables.” — Austin (17:54)

Important Timestamps

• [01:45] — Introduction to why people feel behind financially
• [02:37] — Skewed benchmarks and social media’s impact
• [06:30] — Survivorship bias and invisible failures
• [07:44] — Real benchmark numbers from Federal Reserve data
• [10:32] — Disconnect between feeling and reality, paycheck to paycheck living
• [13:08] — Story of Robert’s own journey and the unique pressures of today
• [14:30] — The three major illusions skewing our benchmarks
• [16:45] — Practical steps to break the cycle of comparison
• [19:09] — Mindset wrap-up and motivational advice

Audience Q&A Highlights

Q1: 401(k) Matching vs. Roth IRA (21:24)

Scenario: Listener’s employer only matches 50% up to 3%, no control over investments
Advice:

• Consider maxing out Roth IRA before heavily funding a mediocre 401(k)
• If possible, do both to capture partial match, but Roth IRA offers control and better potential

“Less than 19% of US adults currently have a Roth IRA… It’s one of the greatest wealth building tools.” — Robert (25:43)

Q2: Asset Allocation for a Modest Earner (26:27)

Scenario: 43yo, no debt, low income, maxing Roth IRA
Advice:

• Keep the Roth simple: stick with ETFs like QQQ, VOO, VTI, AIQ, SPYI
• Consider increasing income via side hustles to boost contributions
• “Keep it simple, do your thing, use the funds we mentioned and you’ll be set.” — Robert (28:53)

Q3: Investing for Elderly Mother-in-law (31:42)

Scenario: $50k, 82yo, seeks ~7% return, low risk, 5-year horizon
Advice:

• 7% return with low risk over 5 years is unrealistic—market volatility is real
• Consider splitting between high-yield savings (3–4%) and conservative ETFs (VOO, SCHD, VTV), but recognize inherent risks
• “If someone says you can get 7% with little to no risk… run the other way because it’s not real.” — Austin (31:57)

Key Takeaways

• Most people are doing better than they think, but social media and highlight-reel culture fosters false feelings of inadequacy
• Benchmark yourself against real, objective data—not outlier success stories or algorithm-chosen headlines
• Controlling your financial destiny is about habits and steady accretion, not chasing “catch-up” via risky moves
• Focus on what you control: savings, debt reduction, skills and income progress, and consistent investing
• Reality checks, not reality TV or LinkedIn posts, are the foundation for true rich habits

This episode is an antidote to financial FOMO—grounded, data-driven, and mindset-focused—with practical next steps for anyone seeking steadier financial footing and peace of mind.