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Ridiculous History is a production of iHeartradio. Welcome back to the show, fellow ridiculous historians. Thank you as always, so much for tuning, tuning in. Let's hear it for one of the best super producers in the game, Mr. Max Williams.
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There he is, Mr. America.
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Boy, it's Max. That's the facts.
B
That's right. That's a song. That's what it was.
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That's also Mr. Noel Brown. They call me Ben Bolin. We're here at the end of 2025. We're recording Precipice.
B
Are we on the precipice of 2026?
A
Yeah, we're recording on Thursday, December 18th. And at this time of the year, since we're referencing songs, this is a time for reflection. Looking back, play Counting Crows, Long December.
B
I was gonna say there is reason to believe that maybe this year will be better than the last. It is a reflect. I didn't even put that together. It's absolutely a reflective song about the following year. Ben, you did this episode research and I think it' really helpful for this time of year, especially given conditions that maybe we can hearken back to a time that was unequivocally, measurably worse than the time we're currently living in. And also know, spoiler alert, that we survived it as a civilization.
A
Hey, there we go, folks. Chin up, chest out. Thanks for joining us. It's the end of the year as we know it and we feel fine.
B
Have you seen the most recent episode of Pluribus, Ben?
A
I have not, actually.
B
The cold open involves the main character, Carol, singing in her car as she's driving, trying to have a chin up attitude about the end of the world as it's portrayed in that show, more or less. And she gets to the. And I feel. And then it cuts off. And that's the cold opening. I just think it's such a clever Vince Gilligan little touch.
A
I love that guy. I love Vince. So we'll probably meet him later on this show. We've noted this in more somber moments, Noel and Max, that the world is ending for someone somewhere at every second of every day. And it's also true to your earlier point, Noel, that throughout history, one group or another has inevitably claimed this year for real. This time, you guys. This year is the actual end of the world. It's the worst year ever. It's the fall of civilization, cats and dogs sleeping together, et cetera. We are happy to report, folks, to Noel's earlier point, that so far throughout human history, all of those apocalyptic doomsday predictions have been cartoonishly incorrect.
B
Isn't cats and dogs sleeping together a good thing? Sort of like the lion lying down with the lamb. Or is that a bad sign?
C
Cats and dogs are a bad thing.
B
Which is sad because if you go on YouTube you can find so many great videos of cats and dogs.
A
They're great.
B
I was watching some this morning. So you're saying once we start seeing cats and dogs getting along, then the end is nigh? Yes.
D
Okay.
A
We're saying that.
B
Keep an eye out.
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That's what people had said because they were honestly being kind of a word I wouldn't usually use. But on both ridiculous history and our sister show, stuff they don't want you to know, we look at a lot of those culty warnings. Please do check out our previous episodes for more crazy stories of times people were wrong about the end of the world.
B
Oh yeah, they got it backwards. There's always some caveat as to what what caused the little mix up and we'll get it right the next time. And they never really do because here we are. Have either of y' all ever seen in the wild someone carrying the end is nigh sign on a stick?
A
Yeah, 100%.
B
That's the kind of thing you do see like in Washington D.C. where the.
A
Yeah, yeah. I think the stick is lazy. I miss the old sandwich boards. You gotta remember sandwich boards.
B
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's like, you know, it's got a little front and a back and potentially the individual is nude underneath. You don't know.
A
You'd never.
B
Unless you take a peek from the side, which I would not advise.
A
Yeah, we don't advise. Side eyeing sandwich board profits.
B
Sandwich board crazies. Well, okay. One person's crazy is another person's profit. Yes, sir.
D
This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.
E
Did you know Microsoft has officially ended Support for Windows 10? Upgrade to Windows 11 with an LG Gram laptop. Voted PCMag's Reader's Choice. Top laptop brand for 2025. Thin and ultra lightweight, the LG Gram keeps you productive anywhere. And Windows 11 gives you access to free security updates and ongoing feature upgrades. Visit lgusa.com iheart for great seasonal savings on LG Gram laptops with Windows 11. PCMag reader's choice used with permission. All rights reserved.
B
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D
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Hey, audiobook lovers. I'm Kalpen.
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Ed and I are inviting you to join the best sounding book club you've ever heard with our new podcast, Irsay The Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club.
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Coca Cola for the big for the small, the short and the tall. Peacemakers. Risk takers for the optimists, pessimists for long distance love for introverts and extroverts, the thinkers and the doers for old.
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A
The next question, though, becomes okay, so first off, yes, a lot of cult leaders will go and gather a group of followers and say, yes, the world is ending September 17th or December 18th, whatever. And then the date comes to pass. Lo and behold, the world continues. And they say, actually, we got the math a little wrong. They'll usually kick it a few years in the future, or even a few months, and they'll say, okay, no, for real this time, you guys. It's January 18th.
B
Totally. And you know who's been popping up a lot lately in the pop culture? That Marshall Applewhite. Cat. Remember him?
A
Oh, I thought you were gonna say the ShamWow guy.
B
He's around. But that Marshall Applewhite? The big floaty. The Heaven's Gate dude? Was that a doomsday cult, technically, because they were really. They wanted to get transported away by extraterrestrials. And it was an event that was timed with the passage of a comet. So there is a day and date to that. But you could argue that it's not apocalyptic per se, but. Well, they did all die.
A
They did think there was an apocalypse. The website is still active because they left a couple of people behind.
B
God, I bet it's GeoCities AF.
A
Right? Our. Our next question, though, despite all these weird incorrect predictions, our next question is a little tougher to dismiss. This is the focus of our, of our exploration today, folks. Was there ever a worst year in history? Logically, if you look at all the years of human civilization, there has to be one, right? There has to be one worst year ever. And a lot of us in the audience tonight, we're probably going to say for various reasons. Yeah, guys, this is the worst year. Just like we said in 2024, just like we said in 2023, 2022, 2021.
B
It's a sliding SC.
A
2020, 2019, 2018.
B
I guess you gotta kinda judge the present based on the events of the past. And we're looking a little farther back into the past for today's reference point. But to what you're saying, Ben, I mean, it is easy to get caught up in the moment, say, gosh, this year sucked. Did it suck for me personally because I had maybe some job issues or some money problems or some romantic issues. Romantic issues. Family tragedies, whatever it might be. We're looking at it much more big picture than that. And I think a lot of the things that people are hung now are pretty big picture. And we're not a political show. We're not gonna get into the nuts and bolts of that. But there are certainly quite a large percentage of the population that are feeling a certain way about the right now. So we're gonna take you back, back, back, back. Back to a time that I think we can all agree for various reasons was. Was worse.
A
Yes. Yeah. Maybe future historians will look back and say, you know, 2025, 2024, 2023 is a worse year. Whatever, whatever. But as we are gonna see, as you so beautifully set up in today's episode, Noel, some current historians, quite a few, have already picked a winner for the worst year in human history. 5:36 CE, they argue, was the worst year ever. So far.
B
Ben, hit us with that. Roman Numi.
A
Right? Yeah. Okay, here we go. So the year we call 536 CE or DXXXVI if you're now Ben, I.
B
Would argue it would be pronounced D XXXVI if you were nasty.
A
Right. Or D. Adults only if you're nasty.
B
So D&C17. Or if you're just down for some titillating erotic drama.
A
There we are. This year is already fairly unique. It happened a long time ago. It's a leap year in the Julian calendar. Ooh, yeah, we love that.
B
Could portend ill, right? Maybe not.
C
I don't know when I feel like.
A
Maybe like leap year or the Julian.
B
Calvin, the leap year, man. You know how much of an issue I have with leap year?
A
I don't like immovable feast.
B
If we're in a leap year, it just feels like there's an ill wind, a blow in and Max is nodding his head.
A
What do you got, Max?
B
Let's see, let's see.
C
You guys remember what the difference between.
B
The leap year and the Julian and the calendar is? I never will. It's supposed to.
A
Frankly, it's ridiculous. So much so that we did an episode about it.
B
I remember we did the episode, but it will never be a thing that I'm able to.
C
Internal is you don't do a leap year.
B
When it leap years. You know, obviously every four years, but you don't do it when it's a. When it's a 100. So like 1500. 1700. Unless it's divisible by 400. So 1700 and 2000.
A
What are they doing here?
B
Put me in a coma. Max, This is facts.
A
So, okay, at the time, people just called 536 CE the year after the consulship of Belisarius.
B
That sounds cool. Let's go with that. We'll say it every time. The year of the. I do love a good year of our Lord, which I know can vary depending on the lord and the year. So if we wanted to connect the dots and talk a little bit about what this thing is. The Belisarius in question is our boy Flavius. One of my favorite Roman names. I don't know why, like flavor Flavius. It just makes me think he's got swagger. Flavius Belisarius.
A
Dude, this guy is a proper war hero.
B
He does have swagger then.
A
Yeah. He was a military commander. He was working for the Byzantine Emperor at the time, Justinian I. The Western Roman Empire had already collapsed less than 100 years prior. Belisarius plays a huge role in regaining a lot of that territory for the Byzantine Empire.
B
Goated military cat, right? I mean, seriously.
A
Yeah. Even now, modern War historians will say he's one of the greatest of all time, or goat, as we mentioned. So it's no surprised that for a little bit of history, he had a whole year named after him.
B
I'm okay with that. It seems earned. Did others do it or did he do it? Unclear.
C
He.
A
He did it himself. He was the thought leader on that way.
B
Okay.
A
He killed a lot of people in the process, and they named a year after him.
B
I would still argue that he. He did. He put the work in.
A
You know, he put the work in. Yeah, he did the reps, for sure.
B
Y' all seen these plaques?
A
What plaques?
B
The plaques in the White House. Talking about writing your own story again, not trying to be political. I just think it's funny. I just think we're seeing some Roman Empire megalomaniacal behavior and writing your own plaques. Other people are supposed to write those plaques, man.
A
Yeah. I don't love it. As an apolitical point, the leadership of the United States should represent all Americans. That's true.
B
And I just also somebody that I love on YouTube, the Internet today, guys pointed out that whenever I see a plaque, I expect for some real dignified to be written. Right? You know? Dignified.
A
Yeah. Something like no shirt, no shoes, no service.
B
Also. Well, you know what? I've never seen that engraved into brass, but. But a plastic plaque is still a plaque.
A
Oh, we go to different gas stations.
E
Wow.
B
Okay. You go to the fancy boy gas stations way up on the hill.
A
Oh, gosh.
B
Well, five golden commodes in the Japanese toilet seats.
A
Oh, geez. I wonder if there is golden bidet.
B
It would be sick if there were more bidets and gas stations. It would keep things cleaner, hopefully.
A
Yeah. On paper, it would work.
B
You know where they do have bidets in every public restroom is in the Middle East.
A
Oh, yeah, Yeah.
B
I mean, and they're like wands. They're handheld.
A
They're on the wall. That's what they're shower nozzles. 536 was a long time ago. We do know a couple things about that year. It's when the Chinese Empress Dowager Li Zhi was born, probably. It's when the Emperor of Japan, Ancan, died. It's when Pope Agapetus died. But those deaths alone are not what inspire historians to call 536the worst year to answer that, to figure out why people hate this year so much, we gotta journey back and we gotta look at the weather. One day, the sky goes dark.
C
Yeah.
B
We are talking about some of the end is nigh kind of business here in A.D. 536, when a mysterious cloud appeared over the Mediterranean basin. Ben, I've got to just really quickly. A mysterious cloud has triggered me. You know, the character Galactus in the Fantastic Four universe who's like a God like entity, an eater of planets, eater of realms.
A
Yeah.
B
Do you know how the Fantastic Four franchise has been sort of plagued in its depiction in cinema? Like, the original one, I think, was in the 90s and it was made by Roger Corman and it was famously shelved for money because it was so bad. Then the second one was also bad with Michael Chiklis as the thing. Then the third one I've heard recently referred to as the one where Galactus is a cloud because it was like just of the era where, like in the most recent one where he's this giant, you know, monstrosity, this, like. What do you call it?
A
Like Lovecraftian.
B
Cosmic Lovecraftian, you know, entity transformer type figure. They didn't have the tech for that in 2001, so they just made him a cloud. They were mysterious cloud. Yeah.
A
They were hearkening back to the ultimate Galactus, ultimate spirit, part of Marvel Universe, which is a little bit, I guess.
B
Historically a dark cloud is. Is a. Is an ill omen, you know.
A
Yeah, very much so. And people were getting super creeped out by this dark, ultimate Galactus level cloud, Especially folks like a Byzantine historian who's often quoted here. His name is Procopius, and he wrote the sun gave forth its light without brightness and it seemed exceedingly like the sun in eclipse, for the beams it shed were not clear.
B
Yeah, he went a bit of a route to get there, but I think he's saying it's like blotting out the sun. He also wrote that it seemed like the sun was constantly, from that point on, eclipsed, and that during this time. Here's his words. Men were free neither from war, nor pestilence, nor. Or any other thing leading to death. All things that are not good, Ben, descended upon the planet and were heralded by this dark, mysterious cloud.
A
It's crazy that there was not social media at the time. People would have gone nuts on the Internet if it existed. This cloud. Yeah, this rolls in and local climates are cooling temperatures. In the summer of 536, they fell several degrees Celsius. And this created the coldest decade in the past 2,300 years. Snow was falling in China in summer. In summer there was snow falling. Crops were failing wide rife, as our pal Frank would say.
B
He would yeah. Ben, are you saying the climate was changing?
A
I'm saying the climate was chaotic.
B
But I'm just saying, like in what we see today, that is often described as climate not unusual, not like historically without precedent. Like the ice Age, for example, represented a massive hiccup in the climate. What we're talking about here would be unseasonable changes in the climate brought on by at the time, surely they knew not what.
A
Yeah, and at a incredibly fast rate. This is overnight kind of stuff.
B
Big old pot.
E
Did you know Microsoft has officially ended Support for Windows 10? Upgrade to Windows 11 with an LG Gram laptop, voted PCMag's Reader's Choice top laptop brand for 2025. Thin and ultra lightweight, the LG Gram keeps you productive anywhere, and Windows 11 gives you access to free security updates and ongoing feature upgrades. Visit lgusa.com iheart for great seasonal savings on LG Gram laptops with Windows 11. PCMag reader's choice used with permission. All rights reserved.
D
It's the most wonderful time of the year, and Valpak is here to make it even better. This month, as you sip through holiday mail, don't miss the blue Valpak envelope. From dining to holiday shopping, there's a slate full of savings in your mailbox, plus a chance to instantly win $100. That's right, you can find $100 Christmas cash inside. Want to save even more money on what you love? Go to valpak.com for local coupons and offers. It pays to open Valpak. No purchase necessary for instant Win voip where prohibited prices are randomly inserted. See specially marked Valpak envelopes for details.
C
This is Rob Gronkowski from Dudes on Dudes with Gronk and jules. For the second season in a row, I partnered with T Mobile's Friday night 5G lights, powering up hometown football across America. This year, T mobile invested over $4 million in prizes to help schools take their Friday nights to the next level. The votes are in, and now it's time to crown our $1 million grand prize winner. Congratulations to Derrick's High school and Derrick's Arkansas, home of the Outlaws and your 2025 T mobile Friday night 5G lights champion. The Outlaws and their community rallied to help them score a game changing home field upgrade, a Gronk Fitness weight room makeover, an epic 2026 tailgate party and a VIP trip to the SEC championship game. To every school that competed, posted and rallied your communities, thank you and to T Mobile for making it all possible. This season may be over, but the story isn't. Stay tuned for season three in 2026. Congratulations again to Derek's high school outlaws.
D
Hear that? It's the sound of truly immersive audio, thanks to Vizio's new four point soundbar and it's now available at Walmart. Powered by Dolby Atmos and DTS X Experience rich cinematic sound with two wireless surround speakers and a compact wireless subwoofer that puts you in the center of your entertainment, all without the clutter of cables. Stream your favorite music radio and podcasts with the iHeartRadio app and trust us, your music has never sounded this good. Head to Walmart.com and upgrade your sound game. Today, 10 athletes will face the toughest job interview in fitness that will push past physical and and mental breaking points. You are the fittest of the fit. Only one of you will leave here with an IFIT contract worth $250,000. This is where mindset comes in. Someone will be eliminated. Pressure is coming down.
B
Trainer games on Prime Video January 8th. Watch the trailer on trainergames.com.
A
From 541 to 542, a pandemic follows on. It's called the Plague of Justinian.
B
Guessing Justinian didn't make that one up himself. That's just, you know, he was in charge. He gets saddled with the plague blame. Unlike our war hero power.
A
He's in the meeting and he's yelling, you guys, I asked for a plaque, not a plague.
B
Exactly. With some dignified ish, 100%. This thing that we're talking about, this cavalcade, this agglomeration, as you'd say, Ben, of bad stuff. Absolutely. Ripped through the Eastern Roman Empire and wiped out a third to half of the entire population of that region. So as you can imagine, this led to some political turmoil.
A
Yeah. Downright biblical. And at this point, nobody knew what caused this. The sky just went dim and dark. And most folks, if you had a man on the street interview at this time, they would say it's a punishment from their version of God. They also did not have the privilege or the opportunity to really investigate this horrific mystery because everybody was too busy trying to stay alive.
B
Yeah. Or just, you know, dying.
A
Or dying. Yeah, yeah. Picture your 10 favorite people. Five of them are gone. This is like, since we've referenced Marvel films, this is like the Thanos. You know what I mean?
B
The Thanos Snap or the Bolan Pop.
A
Yes, exactly. I appreciate the Bol and pop. It would take centuries of later research to figure out what happened and how this global disaster came to be. Ever since the 1990s, when scientists looked at tree ring studies or dendrochronology, they found something interesting. They said, wait. The summers around the year 540 CE or AD, whatever your preference is, were unusually cold. What happened? Before we get to the really dark, dangerous part here, folks, as we said at the top, you're safe. Humanity survived. Humanity went on to invent all sorts of neat stuff like Velcro, synthesizers, radio, even podcasts.
B
Velcro is just the best.
A
Yeah, it's pretty. It's. It's a sticky wicket for sure.
B
It makes a satisfying sound when you, when you separate the pieces.
A
Ooh, yeah. One for all our Cenesasia friends in the crowd, historians return to this question of what made 536 so specifically, enormously, cartoonishly bad. And they started to crack some interesting theories. Noel, could we go to the medieval historian Michael McCormick?
B
Well, Ben, we must. Michael McCormick is an authority on these matters, and he had this to say along with his pal, a glaciologist named Paul Mayewski. And they're operating within an organization called the Climate Change Institute of the University of Maine, leading a team investigating all sorts of things, among them glaciers. So we're talking about using glaciers to measure historical events. Probably not exactly the same as, like, ice cores, but, you know, definitely there's things contained in glaciers that are. That represent events from the past, you know, various compositions of minerals and chemicals and whatever it might be. So through an intense analysis of these ice. It would be ice cores from a glacier over in Switzerland. They determined that the doomsday level event that swept Europe, Asia and the Middle east was unavoidable and perhaps just a taste of the awfulness to come on a long enough timeline. I don't know that we've gotten there yet, but, you know, it's a real roller coaster.
A
Yeah, it's a real roller coaster today. Like you said, inevitable, unstoppable. Right? All paths have led you to me, the answer to the riddle of what made 536 just so bad. Volcanoes. Not just one. A combo move of multiple volcanic eruptions. There was one that was believed to be probably in Iceland, maybe another one in North America that spewed ash across the entirety of the North Northern hemisphere early in the year of 536, followed by two other massive eruptions. One in 541 in 547. And this team, they've got some great work published in a journal called Antiquity. They say the repeated blows followed on by a plague plunged Europe into economic stagnation that lasted well until 640. And then there was a spike. They could find again. They're reading the ice the way you would read rings in a tree. They say there's a spike in airborne lead that marks a resurgence of silver mining. So Noel, our next question becomes what makes these eruptions so dangerous? And maybe to answer that we gotta lean on our how stuff works hats.
B
Yes. Cause they are quite sturdy. This is how stuff works hats. So we can lean right on em. When a volcano erupts, it spews sulfur, something called bismuth, which sounds like a material you might find in the pits of hell and other substances way, way up into the atmosphere where they become aerosolized and form like a kind of bubble, a veil as it's often referred to, that can reflect the sun's light back out into space, cooling the planet. Which, you know, when you say cooling that sounds like relatively innocuous, but we're talking extreme levels of cooling. Yes, yes.
C
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
A
That's a great point about well cooling sounding way less catastrophic than it is. These guys were able to match the ice record of those chemical traces in this ice core with tree ring records of climate. And this is where we go to a guy named Michael Sigle who was at the University of Bern for a long time and they found something predictive. They said look, pretty much every unusually cold summer over the past 2,500 years was directly preceded by a volcanic eruption. That's what inspired Mayewski and McCormick. In 2013, Mayewski's team took this 72 meter long ice core from the Swiss Alps and they used an ultra high resolution method to. What's the best way to say this? We're not experts. They took a look laser that could carve very tiny slices of ice. And with that they were able to say look at this, at this period of time, for just a few days or a few weeks there was snowfall. Right. Or they could tell the weather with that level of sophistication, accuracy and fidelity. And it was a frightening time capsule. They saw 2,000 years fallout from volcanoes, Saharan dust storms, human activity. And it's right right there in the center of Europe. This is nuts, man. They're watching an action movie montage.
B
Yeah, just like really slowly, like the paint drying version of an action movie montage. But we're glad that there are smarter people than us that can do the work there with the ice cores and all of this analysis that takes a lot of discipline, attention to detail and patience. So each of These samples, some 50,000 from each meter of the core, were analyzed for about a dozen different, different elements, you know, checking to see where they fell in the timeline that you can kind of put put together from analyzing these ice cores. The approach enabled the team to pinpoint specific storms, specific volcanic eruptions and lead pollution down to the month with absolute precision, or at least really, really close to being right on the money within a month, or possibly even less within weeks. So more research was to follow.
A
Yeah, here's what we found. It seems that the wind and weather systems back then in 536 must have been just right, just perfect for an apocalypse. It guided the plume of this volcanic eruption southeast across Europe, later into Asia. And this volcanic fog rolled across the land. There was, to be fair, there was nothing civilization could have done to prevent this. And if something like this happened today, there is little that modern civilization could do to stop it. We're basically four volcanoes away from the end of the world for sure.
B
And I guess when we think of things we could do as a society, as a civilization to prevent these kinds of things, I think the mind often jumps to conservation efforts and, you know, reducing pollution and closing the hole in the ozone layer and stuff. This is beyond any of that, right, Ben? This is not man made or contributed to by any activity of human beings.
A
Yeah, this is past the pay grade of the Homo sapien for sure. And we don't wanna lose hope, you know, we wanna dream big. It's a long December for everyone. There's a reason to believe. Yeah, there's a reason to believe there's something new and exciting on the horizon, hopefully. Fivethirtyeights was certainly unusual. It was certainly tough. It led to a terrifying decade of chaos, but humanity soldiered on. And the same research that taught humans about volcanic eruptions also gives insight into how and when civilization recovered. Because the same ice that tells the story of disaster tells the story of humanity getting back on its feet.
B
Well, I think we all love a good comeback story. I mean, obviously, you know, with the atomic bombs dropped on Japan, it was an absolute horrific event that annihilated most aspects of that civilization. But we also know that the recovery and the rebuilding of Japan led to insane advances and led to them being like top of the heap in terms of technology and innovation and culture. And, you know, I just, I love a rebuilding story rising from the ashes. So we have that here, of course.
A
Yeah, yeah. Let's go to Kyle Harper, a medieval and Roman historian at the University of Oklahoma. He says if you look through these ice cores you have a new kind of record for understanding one of the most beautiful words here. Understanding the concatenation of human and natural causes that led to the fall of the Roman Empire. And Kyle says if we could be familiar with you here, Kyle. Kyle says this also shows us the earliest stirrings of a new medieval economy. There was a spike in lead in 640. There's another great name we gotta bring up here, Noel. An archeologist called Christopher Lovelock. What a cool last name.
B
Sounds like a Harry Potter character. Very, very cool. Ben. This also is connected to a story that we talked about. I believe it was this year on our sister pod stuff. They don't want to you to know when we do our strange news segments about newer analysis of these lead levels showing that lead contamination led to cognitive decline in the Roman Empire. That's not the same thing we're talking about here. We're talking about things well beyond the realms of intellect. But we could also argue that what led to a decline in their powers was also brought on by leading levels.
A
Oh yeah, yeah.
B
Making them dumber.
C
Yes.
A
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And check out our upcoming stuff they want, you know, episode about the proposed connection between lead levels and serial killers. Again, like you were saying. No, a little bit outside the scope of this episode but we're always going to be closing and.
B
And we're looking at the lead levels here as a positive because it represents new industry that was emerging. Yeah.
A
Our buddy Christopher Loveluck over at the University of Nottingham points out that these lead levels are smoking gun evidence of mining. So silver is smelted from this lead ore. The lead is a sign that silver is back in business. Silver is back in demand. The economy is rebounding from these volcanic eruptions. You see another lead peak in 660. This means there was a ton of silver going into the medieval economy. And it suggests that gold became increasingly scarce because more people were trading. So you had to move to silver. In essence. We don't have any more Coca Cola. Would you take a Pepsi?
B
No, I'd rather start. I'd rather die of thirst.
A
You're not a Pepsi guy.
B
Not unlike Pepsi. Not like Pepsi, no.
A
It insists upon itself.
B
It really does. It's just. It's very syrupy. It's not my thing. And it also could well be just where we live and the loyalty that I think we all have for the Coke. I will jump in here and say I don't really feel much loyalty to Coke. No, I don't either. You know, I just think Pepsi is gross.
A
You're from Michigan, too.
C
That's what I'm saying.
B
It's just like, I don't really even drink soda that much. I don't really feel that much loyalty to Coke. And I think Coke is vastly spirited Pepsi. It's just. It does. It insists upon itself. It is the Honda Odyssey of soda.
A
Oh, no, you got me back. That was a rollercoaster comment. You're manipulating me so.
B
Well, you know who else kind of insists upon themselves?
A
The upper middle class. Ah, yes. Yeah. Love Luck.
B
We start to see that emerge here a little bit, don't we, with that merchant class? Yeah.
A
Love Luck argues this is the rise of the merchant class, which is the.
B
Most boring Marvel movie title of all time.
A
Rise of the Merchant class. I love 10 minutes of it. I don't know if I love two hours of it.
B
Yeah, I. I don't need it.
A
Just give me a YouTube review. Right.
B
For sure. That's how we do all our research.
E
Did you know Microsoft has officially ended Support for Windows 10 upgrade to Windows 11 with an LG Gram laptop? Voted PC Mag's Reader's Choice top laptop brand for 2025. Thin and ultra, ultra lightweight, the LG Gram keeps you productive anywhere. And Windows 11 gives you access to free security updates and ongoing feature upgrades. Visit LGUSA.com iheart for great seasonal savings on LG Gram laptops with Windows 11 PCMag Reader's Choice used with permission. All rights reserved.
A
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Big blue envelope in your mailbox, Valpak.
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C
This is Rob Gronkowski from Dudes on Dudes with Gronk and Jules. For the second season in a row, I partnered with T Mobile's Friday night 5G lights, powering up hometown football across America. This year, T mobile invested over $4 million in prizes to help schools take their Friday nights to the next level. The votes are in. And now it's time to crown our $1 million grand prize winner. Congratulations to Derrick's High school and Derrick's Arkansas, home of the Outlaws and your 2025 T mobile Friday night 5G lights champion. The Outlaws and their community rallied to help them score a game changing home field upgrade, a Gronk Fitness weight room makeover, an epic 2026 tailgate party and a VIP trip to the SEC championship game. To every school that competed, posted and rallied your communities. Thank you and to T Mobile for making it all possible. This season may be over, but the story isn't. Stay tuned for season three in 2026. Congratulations again to Derek's high school Outlaws.
D
Hear that? It's the sound of truly immersive audio thanks to Vizio's new 4.1 soundbar and it's now available at Walmart. Powered by Dolby Atmos and DTS X Experience Experience Rich cinematic sound with two wireless surround speakers and a compact wireless subwoofer that puts you in the center of your entertainment, all without the clutter of cables. Stream your favorite music radio and podcasts with the iHeartRadio app and trust us, your music has never sounded this good. Head to Walmart.com and upgrade your sound game. Today, 10 athletes will face the toughest job interview in fitness that will push past physical and mental breaking points. You are the fittest of the fit. Only one of you will leave here with an IFIT contract worth $250,000. This is where mindset comes in. Someone will be eliminated. Pressure is coming down.
B
Trainer games on Prime Video January 8th. Watch the trailer on trainergames. But there was a cool YouTube you linked to Ben in this research from Weird History, which is a great channel and the video's called year 536 was the worst year to be alive. What happened? Right.
A
Yeah. In that video, which cites some of the research we're citing here as well. We ultimately conclude the ICE has a lot to say for those who know how to listen and it shows us another generation. Just following the lead patterns is so weird because it shows us another tough time in history. Lead vanishes again during the Black Death from 1349 to 1353.
B
You know, you gotta weigh that a little bit. You got lead or you got the Black Death.
A
Right? Right.
B
One or the other.
A
I said a plaque, not a plague.
B
It would be insult to injury if we had both is all I'm getting at. You know, you got rising lead levels and the Black Death, that would be just too much. But yeah, Black Death death. I'm not meaning to make light. That was another gnarly historical wiper outer of populations.
A
Yeah, it was not a great day for most people. So we've solved the case. Right? The Boffins have figured out that 536 became a terrible year that launched a thousand ships of disaster because of volcanic eruptions. But is it the worst year ever? Is it alarmist or hyperbolic to call it that? That maybe a little.
B
I mean, worst anything ever is in its very nature hyperbolic. That is what that is.
A
Yeah. Yeah.
B
Things could always get worse. We also don't. Well, I guess we are talking about things that have happened. So if you did the math, there's probably some arguments that could be made that you could unequivocally rank it as S tier worst year. Maybe.
A
What of. Right. Definitely one of the worst years. It reminds me a little bit of that. That poem by W.H. auden about the old masters. In the poem, he's talking about this painting where Icarus is falling from the sky because he got.
B
Because he flew too close to the sun. Yeah.
A
And the biggest. The twist of it to spoil this poem is that there's also a boat in the painting. And the people on the boat do not care that Icarus is falling. Their life is fine. So there are populations in other parts of the world that don't know 5:36 is the worst year ever because they don't even have the calendar that tells them it's 5:36.
B
It's a good point. They're just.
A
They're just alive. And they might hear a traveler from afar who's like, hey, I'm from what we call the world. It's Western Europe. Spoiler. And everything's terrible there. And they're like, hey, man, we're. We're fine. You know, welcome to Botswana.
B
Well, in theory, we are fine. If you fast forward to this year being on the cusp of 2026, we are still sitting here in 2025. Humanity has persevered as we are. Want to do. Broken a lot of eggs in the process of making that. What is it? Civilizational omelet.
A
Nailed it. Nailed it. 10. 10, no notes. I like it.
B
I made an omelet this morning. It's on my mind.
A
You did? You make an omelette on a work day?
B
I make an omelette in the morning. Yeah. I work from home. I cook a nice little breakfast. Made some bacon and an omelette and coffee and. Yeah, I like fun.
A
And so we know you make an omelette on a work day.
B
Is that only allowed on the weekends? Are you saying. That's crazy, man. You really party too hard.
A
No. And I.
B
School night, Nolan.
A
I are friends because we have vastly different religions and philosophies.
B
We have vastly different morning routines.
A
Why did I sound scandalized?
B
It was funny. I have to question it. But I'm here for it, Ben.
A
And I'm on a work day at all with this guy.
B
Heavens, sir. God help you if you put any garlic in it.
A
Oh my gosh. I have so many questions that we have to save for off air. And I love getting to know you.
B
Oh, that's what we're here for. That's what podcasting is all about. But we're here making omelets, literal and figurative. We do still have some issues as the climate does seem to be approaching levels, levels of unpredictability that we've described in this aforementioned worst year ever. Experts across the planet are proposing some pretty wild solutions as well. Remember that guy? We talked about this recently on Stuff that I Want yout To Know who, like, he was just a guy. He wasn't even like, had no authority or was an expert really, but he suggested like detonating an atomic bomb underground and that it would have some crazy effect of like reducing pollution or. I don't remember exactly, but I just do remember that there were some experts saying it's crazy, but it just might work.
A
Yeah, yeah. Nukes, nuclear weaponry. Nuclear technology is the shiny new toy right up there with large language models or so called artificial intelligence. So logically, a lot of people said, I don't know man, maybe we nuke stuff. Maybe we can. Maybe nukes are the solution to all those problems we created and cannot solve. But in that spirit, Noel, one of the most well researched, researched, outlandish solutions is something we talked about in a recent episode of Stuff They Don't Want you to Know, stratospheric aerosol injection, or sai. The idea is you can just wish, wish a lot of solid particle aerosols into Earth's stratosphere and then that can help mitigate global warming. We're talking a fleet of airplanes, 6,000 flights every day, 38 million metric tons of sulfur dioxide or similar stuff. Basically, the proposal is to artificially create conditions similar to 536ce.
B
Can I just backtrack one split second because I think people are wondering. The dude I was talking about was a 25 year old Microsoft software engineer. So an expert in something, but not in climate change. Not necessarily. And he proposed.
A
Yeah.
B
A precision detonation of a nuclear bomb under the ocean would, quote, according to ndtv.com, eviscerate the carbon absorbing rocks that make up the seabed and causing rapid rock weathering at a scale substantial enough to make a meaningful dent in atmospheric carbon levels. It was also published in a non peer reviewed website. Not even a journal, a website. Just. Sorry. I was reminded of this crazy idea, amongst among many other crazy ideas, to do something about what's going on with the climate.
A
So what we're telling you here, folks, is essentially that people are attempting to artificially create a volcanic winter, like back in the halcyon days of 536 CE. What do you think?
B
Pretty good year?
A
Is it time to roll the dice? Should we bring back 5:36?
B
Talk about retro, right?
A
Should we bring back 536? Well, we will talk about that and more, much more in the future as we're bringing in 2026. Thank you as always for joining us on our mad continuing adventures to boldly go into the most ridiculous of history.
B
Are we madcap, Ben?
A
I think so.
B
Would we qualify?
A
Yeah, we qualify.
B
Are these madcap adventures. Could we even go so far as to call them capers, perhaps?
A
I love a caper.
B
Yeah, we love a heist. Yes, we could have started on a.
A
Heist and even a caper just on a bagel. You know, I'm down.
B
I do love a caper. I love a caper.
A
It's a delightful little.
B
What do you call it, like a bubble of flavor. It's almost like a fish egg, but it's.
A
Yeah, there we go. That's a really good comparison. We also love you folks for supporting our little show and tuning in with us.
B
Leave us a review. Yeah, by all means, give us the end of the year. Give us the gift of a nice review.
A
Little Attaboy.
B
You know, helps to sleep at night.
A
There it is. And we also want to give a big shout out to Our super producer, Mr. Max Williams, who cuts a clever figure in a suit.
B
We just cuts a real nice figure. And he cuts a mean podcast.
A
Yeah.
B
Oh, he also cuts. He'll cut you if you look at him funny.
A
Oh, behead. And big thanks to our composer, Alex Williams.
B
Ooh, we're going to yoga together tonight, me and Alex.
A
Oh, nice.
B
We're doing a yoga.
A
Oh, that's beautiful.
B
I've seen him in ages.
A
I'm looking forward to that. That's awesome. We also want to note that Jonathan Strickland, AKA the Quizzter, did not show up to our holiday party.
B
You know what? He didn't. But he's also allergic to alcohol and shellfish, and both of those things were on offer at this event. So he may well have died.
A
Perhaps. Perhaps.
B
Atmosphere may well have choked him choked the life right out of him.
A
Well, he's contractually obligated to come back from the dead and appear on ridiculous history, so stay tuned for that.
B
Kind of a Ghost of Christmas future. What do you think? Which ghost would he be? Or is he just the Scrooge of it all?
A
He's the Scrooge and he likes that main character energy.
B
I want to be whichever ghost was played by the guy from the New York Dolls in Scrooge who drives the cat cab. He's got the blacked out teeth.
A
Yeah, we mentioned him previously as well. He's probably one of my favorites too. We also have more people to thank. Eve's Jeffcoat Christopher Odis here in spirit. Yeah, here in Christmas spirit. Nice one. What else? Noel should we guys, should we just be the volcano that we want to see?
B
We want to be the volcano you wish to see in the world. Yeah. Which is hopefully not that many active ones anymore.
A
Well, there are three. There are four of us. There's the three of us recording. There's you joining us at home. So between four volcanoes, we can end the world.
B
We can blow out the sun.
A
Yes.
B
Believe in yourself.
A
There we go. That's a show. Tune in later this week. We're going to get to some stuff we didn't get to in previous episodes across 2025.
B
Oh, I like the way you put that. We'll see you next time. Time, folks. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
E
Did you know Microsoft has officially ended Support for Windows 10? Upgrade to Windows 11 with an LG Gram laptop, voted PCMag's Reader's Choice top laptop brand for 2025. Thin and ultra lightweight, the LG Gram keeps you productive anywhere and Windows 11 gives you access to free security updates and ongoing feature upgrades. Visit lgusa.com iheart for great seasonal savings on LG Gram laptops with Windows 11. PCMag reader's choice used with permission. All rights reserved.
D
This is Sophie Cunningham from Show Me Something. Do you know the symptoms of moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea, or OSA in adults with obesity? They may be happening to you without you knowing. If anyone has ever said you snored loudly, or if you spend your days fighting off excessive tiredness, irritability and concentration issues, it may be due to osa. OSA is a serious condition where your airway partially or completely collapses during sleep, which may cause breathing interruptions and oxygen deprivation. Learn more at don'tsleep on OSA.com this information is provided by Lily, a medicine company. It's the most wonderful time of the year, and Valpak is here to make it even better. This month as you sip through holiday mail, don't miss the blue Valpak envelope. From dining to holiday shopping, there's a slate full of savings in your mailbox, plus a chance to instantly win $100. That's right, you can find $100 Christmas cash inside. Want to save even more money on what you love? Go to valpak.com for local coupons and offers. It pays to open Valpak. No purchase necessary for instant win voip prohibited prices are randomly inserted. See specially marked Valpak envelopes for details. Hear that? It's the sound of truly immersive audio thanks to Vizio's new 4.1 soundbar and it's now available at Walmart. Powered by Dolby Atmos and DTS X. Experience rich cinematic sound with two wireless surround speakers and a compact wireless subwoofer that puts you in the center of your entertainment, all without the clutter of cables. Stream your favorite music radio and podcasts with the iHeartRadio app and trust us, your music has never sounded this good. Head to Walmart.com and upgrade your sound game. Today.
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My perfect day has sand, salt water and friends, but my moderate to severe plaque psoriasis can take me out of the moment. Now I'm all in with clearer skin thanks to Skyrizi Risankizumab RZA a prescription only 150mg injection for adults who are candidates for systemic or phototherapy. With Skyrizi, Most people saw 90% clearer skin and many were even 100% plaque free. At four months, Skyrizi is just four doses a year. After two starter doses.
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Don't use if allergic to Skyrizi. Serious allergic reactions, increased infections or lower ability to fight them may occur before treatment. Get checked for hour an infections and tuberculosis. Tell your doctor about any flu like symptoms or vaccines.
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Thanks to Skyrizi there's nothing on my skin and that means everything is everything. Ask your doctor about Skyrizi, the number one dermatologist prescribed biologic in psoriasis. Visit skyrizi.com or call 1-866-skyrizi to learn more.
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This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.
Podcast: Ridiculous History
Episode Date: December 23, 2025
Hosts: Ben Bowlin & Noel Brown
Summary by: Podcast Summarizer AI
Ben and Noel dig into a contender for "Worst Year in History": 536 CE. Framed with their usual mix of irreverence, pop culture references, and historical investigation, they unpack why historians consider 536 CE spectacularly grim—exploring strange darkness, climate disaster, economic collapse, and the centuries-long fallout. The episode blends historical sources, new scientific findings, and the hosts’ signature banter to reflect on why, in bleak times, looking back at survive-and-recover stories matters.
For more, listen to the full episode on iHeartRadio, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.