Roadmap to Referrals – Ep #378

Is Your Referral Generation Lacking?

Host: Stacey Brown Randall
Release Date: September 9, 2025

Episode Overview

In this episode, Stacey Brown Randall addresses the common frustration of lacking referral generation, even when you’re actively trying to improve it. She speaks directly to business owners who are genuinely implementing referral-building strategies but feel their results are falling short. Stacey outlines the key reasons referral generation may still be underperforming, breaking down the four most frequent pitfalls—each with actionable insights—while assuring listeners this isn’t a push to join her coaching but real talk meeting you where you are.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Who This Episode Is (and Isn't) For

• Not For:
  • People expecting “magic bullet” referrals with zero effort.
    • “There is no time on this...that I can pull a rabbit out of a hat and be like, presto, Bingo. There you go. Here are all your referrals. You did nothing. Congratulations. Right? Not how it works.” (01:13)
  • Clients who aren’t implementing the work—they already know what to do and support is handled directly.
• For:
  • Listeners doing “some of what you need to do”—you’re consuming content, sending thank you notes, tracking intake, leveraging free resources, and making a real effort, but your results still disappoint.
  • “You are doing things, but you still feel like your referral generation is lacking.” (06:53)

Main Topic: Four Reasons Your Referral Generation Is Lacking

1. You’re Not Really Connecting (09:07)

• Issue: Mistaking surface-level interactions (emails, mass newsletters, business card exchanges) for true connection.
• Insight: Lasting referrals require genuine, personalized, and deeper relationships, not just “keeping in touch.”
• Quote:
  • “You can't really connect with someone when you're hanging out at the surface level.” (11:38)

2. Who You Want to Refer You Can’t Actually Refer You (13:10)

• Issue: Not everyone you’d like to refer you actually can—maybe they never meet your ideal client or are loyal to a competitor.
• Insight: Regularly reevaluate if your efforts are directed at people with real referral potential.
• Quote:
  • “Just because you want them to refer to you doesn’t mean they can actually refer to you.” (15:44)

3. Your Follow-up and Follow-through Are Not Consistent (18:05)

• Issue: Lack of systematic and ongoing engagement sabotages trust and top-of-mind awareness.
• Insight: You must create and sustain routines to stay present and reliable in your intended referrer’s world.
• Quote:
  • “If your follow-through and your follow-up is not consistent for you to either be able to move from keeping in touch to staying top of mind...then you’re not going to be able to generate referrals from them, no matter how bad you want to receive referrals.” (19:28)

4. You Haven’t Really Built a Foundation for the Relationship (21:00)

• Issue: Trying to harvest referrals from insufficiently nurtured relationships—being self-focused instead of truly helpful.
• Insight: Relationship-building for referrals must prioritize giving, supporting, and becoming valuable—long before expecting anything.
• Quote:
  • “Nobody cares about who they can refer to you until they know you care about them. These are people, not an algorithm.” (23:08)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “If someone’s not referring you, it may very well be because they can’t refer. They don’t uncover the problem you solve when they’re talking to people or...they actually already have somebody like you that they refer to.” (16:54)
• “When you’re building a relationship, you’ve got to do it the right way and you’ve got to make it about them... It might take forever. But if you want someone to put their reputation on the line and refer people to you, you just don’t... That’s just not going to happen because you show up once and you’re like, hey, look at me! I’m so great. You’re so great. You should refer to me. That’s just not how it works.” (24:10)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• 00:04 – Introduction and clarity on who this episode is for (and not for)
• 06:53 – The real target audience for the episode defined
• 09:07 – First pitfall: not really connecting—and what “connection” actually means
• 13:10 – Second pitfall: wanting referrals from people who can’t refer
• 18:05 – Third pitfall: inconsistent follow-up and follow-through
• 21:00 – Fourth pitfall: lacking real relationship foundation
• 24:10 – Final summary and call to reassess your referral-building efforts

Practical Takeaways

• Audit your “connection” activities for depth—don’t confuse outreach with meaningful contact.
• Evaluate your so-called referral sources—do they interact with your ideal targets and are they open to referring you?
• Commit to consistent follow-up with systems that work for your schedule and style.
• Focus on relational giving, not just transactional networking—invest in others.

Closing Thoughts

Stacey encourages listeners to honestly self-assess which, if any, of these four reasons may apply, and to revisit the episode as needed. She reinforces the message that building a referable business demands both process and heart, but when done right, referrals will follow.

Find episode transcripts and resources at: staceybrownrandall.com/378
Quote to remember:

• “You deserve referrals naturally…without manipulating, incentivizing, or even asking.”