Ruthless Podcast: Democrats' Bizarre Candidates + Hack Madness!
March 20, 2026
Hosts: Josh Holmes, Comfortably Smug, Michael Duncan, John Ashbrook
Episode Overview
This episode of the Ruthless Podcast delivers a fast-paced, irreverent breakdown of the latest Democratic candidates making headlines for all the wrong reasons, plus the highly anticipated "Hack Madness" tournament—an annual satire event pitting liberal media "hacks" against each other for listener-voted infamy. Hosts Josh Holmes, Comfortably Smug ("Smug"), Michael Duncan ("Smash"), and John Ashbrook offer their uniquely biting analysis on candidate oddities, media absurdities, and the shifting liberal media landscape. Expect a mix of conservative commentary, running inside jokes, and pointed (if tongue-in-cheek) critiques.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Democrats’ “Bizarre” Candidates [00:00–21:57]
a. Outlandish Congressional Hopefuls
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James Talarico (Texas):
- Criticized for "vegan" campaigning and allegedly disingenuous lifestyle (suggesting he secretly loves meat).
- Called out for public statements on meat consumption’s link to climate change.
- Hosts suggest he "lives a lie" to appeal to vegan activists, referencing old tweets of Talarico with meat:
- Smug: "I think Talrico loves eating the meat and he loves the bone...his team and Chuck Schumer are very litigious. If we were to tell you guys about how much he loves the meat and filling his mouth with the bones..." (10:42)
- Ashbrook: "Evidence. There's evidence. Support this. Tall Rico put up a tweet of him eating one of those big dinosaur beef ribs." (10:33)
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Bobby Polito (TX-15 Candidate, former music video actor):
- Lampooned for appearing as a “pervert” in a music video, leading to jokes about “chronic masturbation” and public indecency. Hosts argue media would never let such dirt slide for Republicans.
- Comfortably Smug: "Candidates like this on the Democrat side can get across the line and win a primary...because the mainstream media will always hide the craziest shit about a Democrat." (14:41)
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Kiana Biaria Anderson (NY-4 Candidate):
- Receives attention for calling to abolish the 13th Amendment, misunderstanding its context in criminal justice.
- Hosts use this as a jumping-off point to say she’s exposing the party’s true stance on labor and open borders:
- “She’s like the one Democrat who’s actually consistent. We've known since Abe Lincoln told Democrats, no, slavery's actually over. They've been mad about it and they've never let it go. And she’s actually being honest.” (19:38)
Notable Quote:
- On Talarico: "This is the regular guy who's going to win Texas...but he doesn't like meat. He's made that very clear in that statement." (08:51–09:01)
b. Media Protection & Double Standards
- The hosts repeatedly accuse the mainstream media of hiding damaging stories about Democrats that would be front-page news for the GOP.
- Recurrent claim: Democrat oddballs skate through primaries due to media cover and party backing.
2. Hack Madness Returns! [03:17–77:07]
a. The Tradition
- “Hack Madness” is described as a “March Madness”-style tournament, started over five years ago, where 64–65 notorious liberal media personalities and activists compete for the crown of "Worst Liberal Hack."
- Listeners can vote and submit their own brackets.
- The hosts deride copycat efforts by rival podcasts:
- Smug: “The Pod Bros tried doing...March badness. Which is the lamest shit ever. And they got like four votes per bracket…” (05:02)
- Smash: “There’s no substitute for March.” (05:17)
b. State of the Liberal Media
- Media landscape is called “shifting rapidly.” Many legacy media figures are now “scattered to the winds” as mainstream media (e.g., Washington Post) struggle, and a new generation of hacks emerges via Substack and podcasts.
- Ashbrook: "Much like NIL has disrupted the college basketball landscape in March Madness, the destruction of the liberal media apparatus...has impacted our seeding today." (33:48)
c. 2026 Brackets Reveal & Analysis
Notable #1 Seeds:
- Don Lemon (“Don Lamond,” Liberal Activist Division)
- SV Date (Way Too Online Division)
- Abby Phillips (Fake News Division)
- Stephen Colbert (Establishment Division)
Memorable Quotes:
- Smug: "Don Lamond...I'm going to show up in a church and commit hate crimes." (35:36)
- Ashbrook: “Invading a church with BLM activists is exactly the sort of track record and body of work that leads to a number one seed.” (35:55)
- On Colbert: “Hasn’t been a late night comedy show in like a decade. We know what that is.” (42:09)
Brackets & Matchups Discussion
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The crew enthusiastically reviews first round matchups, speculates on upsets, and delivers caustic side commentary, e.g.:
- On Heather Cox Richardson: “This woman is insane. It's well deserved here at the 5C.” (44:20)
- On Rachel Maddow as a 10 seed: “I'm surprised. I thought she was would be a little bit higher than that.” (48:35)
- On Hassan Piker: “He said America deserved 9/11. And now you have elected Democrats going on his show.” (56:30)
- On trends: “The media landscape is shifting by the day...especially on the left, where you've got these crazy Looney Tunes people like Hasan Piker…” (72:49)
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Recurring inside jokes and character attacks (age, hypocrisy, alleged corruption) abound, such as:
- “Lot of age attacks.” (64:26)
- “Jake Tapper used to be famous for...If you tweeted out that, like, Jake Tapper had a bad take On CNN, within 30 seconds, your inbox is like, how dare you say this shit?” (71:26)
d. Listener Participation
- Emphasis that fans can vote on matchups (including play-in games), submit their brackets at RuthlessPodcast.com, and engage via Smug’s X account.
3. Trump Stand-up Moments [24:15–29:36]
- The hosts share and react to humorous clips of Donald Trump poking fun at political allies and foreign leaders.
- Notable moments:
- Trump’s playful confusion over Mike Johnson’s ethnicity: “To me, Mike was always a wasp. Now I learned that this is serious Italian stuff.” (25:14)
- On Macron/France: "On a scale of 0 to 10, I'd say he's been an 8. Not perfect, but it's France." (28:29)
- Hosts riff on Italian food, Olive Garden, and “endless breadsticks and salad” as tools for legislative negotiation.
4. General Tone, Running Gags & Memorable Moments
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Running Gags:
- Accuses James Talarico of secretly loving meat for comic effect.
- Aging out of legacy hacks; “age attacks” as a point of humor.
- The “media hack” as a comedic archetype—side remarks about career failures, substack grifts, and hypocrisy.
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Notable Exchanges:
- “That's a humiliated pig, bro. It's probably the meanest breakdown I've ever heard anybody do. He has no pie.” (61:12 referring to Brian Stelter)
- “I want to say in my opinion. So Jake Tapper used to be famous for. He would DM you when he was mad about some... He's kind of mellowed on that. Maybe his heart's not in the game.” (71:26)
Segment Timestamps
| Timestamp | Topic | |-------------|----------------------------------------------------| | 00:00–03:09 | Cold Open: Democrats’ absurd candidates, media bias | | 03:17–06:26 | Introduction to Hack Madness tradition | | 06:26–11:20 | Discussion of specific Democratic candidate oddities| | 11:43–17:45 | Media double standards, more candidate lampooning | | 17:49–21:57 | Radical takes on the 13th Amendment | | 24:15–29:36 | Trump’s stand-up moments, political banter | | 33:09–76:18 | Hack Madness bracket reveals, analysis, predictions | | 72:49–77:07 | Wrap-up, call for listener participation |
Takeaways
- The Ruthless Podcast’s annual “Hack Madness” is both a running comedy segment and pointed critique of what the hosts see as a decaying, insulated liberal media ecosystem.
- Their review of Democratic candidates is caustic and personal, focused on performative or "woke" politics, perceived hypocrisy, and media protection.
- Trump’s comic persona is contrasted favorably with Democratic leadership.
- Interaction and participation from listeners is repeatedly encouraged, centering the show’s audience as part of the ongoing conservative culture war entertainment.
Final Thoughts
This episode is a full-throttle, edgy mix of conservative criticism, sharp-tongued humor, and media mockery, using the Hack Madness tournament as both a satire of March Madness and an annual inventory of whom the hosts consider the most egregious liberal media and activist figures. Fans are urged to engage directly via bracket submissions and X voting, reinforcing the show’s community feel and ongoing lampooning tradition.
