Desperate Times For Democrats + Trump Plays Hardball With Putin

Summary

Ruthless Podcast: Episode Summary Title: Desperate Times For Democrats + Trump Plays Hardball With Putin
Hosts: Josh Holmes, Comfortably Smug, Michael Duncan, John Ashbrook
Release Date: August 15, 2025

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1. Opening Remarks and Setting the Tone

The episode kicks off with Michael Duncan expressing frustration with liberal beliefs, emphasizing a return to reality regarding societal issues. He states, “Welcome back to the real world... it does not happen” (00:00). John Ashbrook reinforces this sentiment, critiquing the liberal media's portrayal of President Trump's interactions with Vladimir Putin.

2. Chevron Advertisement Segment

(Note: Advertisements are skipped as per instructions.)

3. Fun Time Friday: Nostalgia and College Memories

Josh Holmes introduces the segment “Fun Time Friday,” where the hosts reminisce about their college days, specifically discussing the creation of Jungle Juice—an alcoholic concoction popular among students. John Ashbrook shares humorous anecdotes about mixing large quantities of alcohol, likening himself to Walter White (02:58).

4. Crime and Public Perception in Washington D.C.

The hosts delve into recent developments in Washington D.C., highlighting federal crackdowns on crime. Josh Holmes references previous episodes that discussed the fallout over D.C. federalization and new CNN statistics indicating a decrease in American drinking habits (04:12).

Michael Duncan underscores the shift in public opinion, stating, “you can punch cops and get away with it... that does not happen” (05:22). The conversation criticizes liberal approaches to law enforcement and public safety, arguing that Democrats have failed to effectively manage crime, leading to a resurgence of issues in the capital.

5. Highlighting Democratic Failures: Focus on Chuck Schumer

The discussion shifts to Democratic leaders, particularly Chuck Schumer. John Ashbrook criticizes Schumer’s effectiveness, mocking his performance and suggesting his prolonged tenure has rendered him ineffective: “He's like a speed bag... You could walk with him all day” (16:43).

Michael Duncan adds, “I love seeing criminals get the shit kicked out of [the cop in the sandwich incident]... That's what I support,” (28:12) reinforcing their stance on strong law enforcement.

6. Trump-Putin Summit: Analyzing Foreign Policy

Josh Holmes provides an in-depth analysis of the anticipated meeting between President Trump and Russian President Vladimir Putin in Alaska. He outlines the historical context, noting, “Putin invaded Crimea when Barack Obama was president... invaded the rest of Ukraine when Joe Biden was president” (43:02). The hosts praise Trump’s approach to foreign policy, highlighting his willingness to engage directly with adversaries to broker peace.

Comfortably Smug emphasizes Trump’s credibility, stating, “He is competent and capable of following through on his threats” (41:04). The discussion contrasts Trump’s direct methods with what they perceive as the ineffective and overly bureaucratic approaches of Democratic leaders like John Kerry and Samantha Power.

7. Democratic Fantasy Football: A Satirical Take

In a humorous segment, the hosts engage in a "Democrat Fantasy Draft," assigning football positions to various Democratic politicians. For example:

• Josh Holmes drafts Jasmine Crock, praising her on-field abilities while recommending dropping Chuck Schumer, whom he describes as “shifty” and “tired” (62:35).
• John Ashbrook selects Pete Buttigieg, lauding his “competence” and “scat back” skills (60:44).
• Michael Duncan opts for Zoran Mumdani and drops Beto O’Rourke, criticizing his performance in Texas showdowns (61:48).

This segment serves as a satirical critique of Democratic leadership, portraying them as ineffective players in the political arena.

8. Mutant Rabbits: A Bizarre News Segment

The hosts discuss a sensational news story reported by the New York Post about mutant rabbits in Fort Collins, Colorado. These rabbits allegedly exhibit “black tentacles” growing from their heads due to a rare virus (53:56). The conversation blends humor and skepticism, with Michael Duncan sarcastically suggesting, “You see this? This is real” (54:45).

Comfortably Smug and John Ashbrook mock the absurdity of the situation, suggesting exaggerated measures like shooting the affected rabbits. The segment highlights the hosts' penchant for blending humor with current events, regardless of their credibility.

9. F15 Ejection Incident: Military Misadventures

An incident involving a tourist accidentally ejecting from an F15D Eagle is discussed. Josh Holmes describes how the tourist, named Sean Charles Dunn, mistakenly used the ejection handle on the tarmac, resulting in his unplanned exit before the plane took off (65:32). The hosts ridicule the mishap, suggesting the tourist was irresponsible and highlighting the dangers of such actions.

Michael Duncan humorously advises, “If you see a dude with horns, shoot it,” (55:46), underscoring their disdain for seemingly foolish behavior.

10. Closing Remarks: Emphasizing American Strength

In their concluding remarks, the hosts reaffirm their support for President Trump's policies, particularly his hardline stance against Vladimir Putin. They criticize the Democratic leadership for perceived weaknesses and incompetence, asserting that Trump’s strength and competence are what America needs.

Josh Holmes summarizes, “There is nobody that can explain the Trump Doctrine and call AOC fat in the same episode” (69:17), encapsulating the episode's blend of political critique and humor.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Michael Duncan (00:00): “Welcome back to the real world... it does not happen.”
• John Ashbrook (00:14): “Let me preview exactly what the liberal media is gonna say... It doesn't happen.”
• John Ashbrook (28:14): “I think we need to start making examples which...”
• Josh Holmes (43:02): “Putin invaded Crimea when Barack Obama was president... invaded the rest of Ukraine when Joe Biden was president.”
• Comfortably Smug (41:41): “He's a deal maker. Yes, he wants things to get done.”
• Michael Duncan (55:46): “If you see a dude with horns, shoot it.”

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Conclusion

This episode of the Ruthless Podcast combines political analysis with humor and satire, primarily focusing on the perceived failures of the Democratic Party and lauding President Trump’s approach to foreign policy. The hosts use a mix of serious commentary and light-hearted segments to engage listeners, reinforcing their conservative viewpoints while entertaining with anecdotes and humorous takes on current events.

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Note: Timestamps correspond to key moments in the episode for reference.

Transcript

[Michael Duncan]

Libs, get it through your head. Welcome back to the real world. You know, it's no longer the stupid shit of, you can punch cops and get away with it. You can do this stupid, performative shit and resist, and everyone's gonna stand up and cop. That does not happen.

[John Ashbrook]

It doesn't happen.

[Michael Duncan]

That's a delusion in your head. And now the real world is bad.

[John Ashbrook]

Let me preview exactly what the liberal media is gonna say after this meeting between Putin. No deal, they'll say, and Trump. They're gonna be like, what a gift. What a gift to Vladimir Putin, this autocratic dictator. And what they will ignore. Obviously, in the last four years, when Joe Biden was president, he didn't bring peace. No. Peace happened between Ukraine and war broke Russia.

[Josh Holmes]

In fact, it is $400 billion lighter in the pocket as a result. America is built on hard work and powered by American energy. Chevron has spent $44 billion with local businesses across all 50 states since 2022.

[Michael Duncan]

Fueling infrastructure and communities, all while strengthening local economies.

[Josh Holmes]

Last year, Chevron increased U.S. production nearly 20%, powering communities and businesses from the heartlands to the coasts. We're helping to fuel America's energy advantage, building a brighter future right here at home. Visit chevron.comamera to discover more.

[Michael Duncan]

Ladies and gentlemen, your attention, please. Keep the faith, hold the line, and own the libs.

[Comfortably Smug]

It's time for our main event.

[Josh Holmes]

Fun Time Friday. Welcome back to the Ruthless Friday program. I'm Josh Holmes along with comfortably smug Michael Duncan and John Ashbrook. Left to right, across your radio dial. I'm sorry, I didn't hear you come in. We were just discussing our Jungle Juice prowess. You've interrupted. You, the listener, have interrupted our conversation about how we used to procure Jungle Juice.

[John Ashbrook]

Well, I don't know if maybe this is you guys, too. I assume it is, but my Instagram has been flooded by Rush talk.

[Josh Holmes]

Yes.

[John Ashbrook]

You know, like, all of these sororities doing their dances and stuff about the algorithm. It's the algorithm. It's pump. It's juicing it. It's juicing it. Which, of course, just, you know, triggers some old memories.

[Josh Holmes]

Blast from the past.

[John Ashbrook]

Our college days.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah.

[John Ashbrook]

You know, I think we were having a discussion about, like, making the mix for the Jungle Juice.

[Comfortably Smug]

Some people call it hunch punch.

[John Ashbrook]

Hunch punch? Yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

Is that what you did in college?

[Michael Duncan]

Hunch punch?

[Josh Holmes]

Is that Miami of Ohio?

[Michael Duncan]

Bro, that literally sounds like from, like, the 1950s.

[Josh Holmes]

The second.

[Michael Duncan]

Some hunch punch and pie before the Sadie Hawkins dance.

[Josh Holmes]

Why?

[Michael Duncan]

Why?

[John Ashbrook]

I hunch Punch was back there in Prohibition.

[Michael Duncan]

Yeah. Tell us the story, Grandpa.

[Josh Holmes]

You need a password to get a.

[Michael Duncan]

Hunch, P. You had to go across.

[Comfortably Smug]

The county line as fast as possible.

[John Ashbrook]

No, I loved making, you know, the Jungle Juice in college and, like, the big trash can and.

[Josh Holmes]

That's the risk of sounding a little rapey.

[John Ashbrook]

Well, no, it's just. Look, it's a Volume game. It's a volume game. And you'd sit there, and, of course, all the Everclear went in.

[Michael Duncan]

Right.

[John Ashbrook]

Everything went in there.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah.

[John Ashbrook]

And so I kind of found myself being like Walter White.

[Josh Holmes]

Little chemistry.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah. And you'd have the, you know, the powdered Gatorade.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah.

[John Ashbrook]

Or Country Time Lemonade was also another.

[Josh Holmes]

One where you fundamentally change it. When you put the powder, you kind of.

[John Ashbrook]

You're throwing it in there, and then people are mixing it up.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah.

[John Ashbrook]

You know, and you're. And then you're with, like, a plunger. Yeah. And then you're like. You get to be Anthony Bourdain. They're just taking sips and being, like, perfect.

[Josh Holmes]

I mean, those things are unbelievable. I got to imagine, as school is now reinstating itself all across particular, the sec, Big Ten.

[Michael Duncan]

I mean, there were those. What was it? Statistics coming out earlier this week of how American drinking has gone down significantly. So, like, I don't. I bet that's like, a bygone era.

[Josh Holmes]

No.

[Comfortably Smug]

Oh, you don't think they drink in college?

[Josh Holmes]

Not where it's cool.

[Michael Duncan]

No. Not like. Not like they used to.

[Josh Holmes]

I think you hang out with the wrong people.

[Michael Duncan]

Dude, please. Look at the statistics.

[Josh Holmes]

No, he's right about the stats, but you're talking about a bunch of fucking nerds. We're hanging out and, like, Gen Z is over drinking. I don't buy it. I mean, dude, sec. I just introduced you to the sec.

[John Ashbrook]

I think the fellows need to do a little tour.

[Josh Holmes]

We should see for ourselves what's going on.

[John Ashbrook]

Just make sure we're passing the baton to the younger generation.

[Josh Holmes]

Do you think we would get in trouble if we just try to, like, old school haze kids?

[John Ashbrook]

Bows and toes.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah.

[Michael Duncan]

No.

[Josh Holmes]

I pick a brick.

[Michael Duncan]

America's. I think you're allowed to be normal now. No, I'm being serious. Like, I think the days, like, we see that Trump's like, crime's illegal, and, like, Dems are trying to have a backlash to this, but everyone's like, no, no, I think he's right. Crime is bad. Sydney Sweeney ads. Hey, you know, Yeah, a hot woman is good to sell things for, you know? Yeah, that's what they do. Well, yeah, yeah. That's normal. I think, like college hazing is like. I'm not saying go kill somebody, but having some good fun, you know? Yeah, I think that's okay. Now put a cigarette. I think we're done with the, like, I don't know.

[John Ashbrook]

Don't do that. Please do that.

[Josh Holmes]

I joke. I'm sorry, we. I'm tired. We're laughing. But, you know, I think the point is, is that maybe an old school style ruthless tour, a fact finding.

[Michael Duncan]

Yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

At some level would be appropriate.

[John Ashbrook]

I can't wait to tell my wife about that one.

[Josh Holmes]

Oh, she's not gonna be happy. She's not. Can you imagine how do you sell that at home?

[Michael Duncan]

It's the tank, Frank, the tech.

[Josh Holmes]

And if they are a little weakened in this area, to your point, smug.

[Comfortably Smug]

I.

[Josh Holmes]

We would probably dominate those campuses. I'm just saying.

[Comfortably Smug]

Anyway, people want to have fun. Yeah, they do.

[Josh Holmes]

Well, we're Good Time Charlie's. We're Good Time Charlies. Everybody wants us in there. Listen, on Fridays, we like to make fun of stuff, and there is plenty to work with. This particular week, I think we had a productive Tuesday and Thursday episode that we're making fun of the various fallout over D.C. federalization. Heaven forbid we cracked down a little crime, because a little crime's okay. Apparently now. You know, I mean, I saw new CNN numbers, by the way. They totally validated everything that was that. We were saying on Tuesday and Thursday that, like, Americans are looking at Trump.

[Michael Duncan]

Yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

Right now. They're like, yeah, that's what we want.

[Michael Duncan]

Yeah.

[John Ashbrook]

Shout out to Harry Enton, by the way.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah.

[John Ashbrook]

You know what I love about CNN in this current iteration is that, like, most of their programming outside of Scott Jennings is atrocious. And I would never watch it for a second. But in the polling segments, they let Harry do. It's like a moment in which they tell the truth to their audience.

[Josh Holmes]

It's like the editor doesn't get the view of what it is that he's gonna say. It's so disconnected from all of the other programming.

[Michael Duncan]

I bet Harry has to roll up to that with the thumb drive of his polling. He's like, no one looks at this before I start talking.

[Josh Holmes]

Everything you've talked about for the last 11 hours on this show, Nobody.

[Michael Duncan]

He's like, here's polls. I say, that's all bullshit. All right, I gotta go anyway.

[Josh Holmes]

But they keep putting them on anyway, so that's what it is. But it turns out Democrats have been all over the place and it's not just the crime thing. There's a whole bunch of things. Boot, Petaj.

[John Ashbrook]

Yes.

[Josh Holmes]

You know, we just love Boot on this program. We've been talking about Boot for a long time. And Boot always gets himself into a little bit of a pickle because I don't think he actually believes in anything.

[Michael Duncan]

He doesn't. He's a psychopath.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah, he's a psychopath, but he's often asked things that you should have an answer to. And of course he's now, should we say, vying for the great state of Michigan. He wants to be a part of the political process there. Is he running for governor? Is he not? What is he doing?

[Michael Duncan]

I think he said he's not running for governor. I mean, he's just. Everyone knows he's running for president. Everybody knows.

[Josh Holmes]

Well, he moved to Michigan because he couldn't win anything in Indiana, where he was from. Where? What happened there? Smash?

[Comfortably Smug]

I mean, he tore down every 1,000 homes in black neighborhoods just so he could say that I tore down a thousand homes in a thousand days.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah, yeah. So he moves to Michigan because they have a fighting chance to win something there. And he like all of a sudden started raising his political profile and acted like he was so cited. Maybe a Senate race, maybe a governor's race. I'm not sure any of that's panning out, but goes on these shows. People ask him real things. Check out clip one.

[Michael Duncan]

Do you think it's time to recognize a Palestinian state?

[Josh Holmes]

I think that's a profound question that arises.

[Michael Duncan]

A lot of the biggest problems that.

[Josh Holmes]

Have happened with Israel's survival, Israel's right to survival in the diplomatic scene, and.

[Michael Duncan]

Many of the people who have taken.

[Josh Holmes]

That step historically have done so for different reasons than what we see happening with European countries.

[Michael Duncan]

I think we need to step back.

[Josh Holmes]

And we need to do whatever it takes to ensure that there is a real two state solution and that no.

[Michael Duncan]

One, not even the likes of Netanyahu, can veto.

[Josh Holmes]

The international community throw that buzzword in to a two state solution where you have Palestinians and Israelis living with safety, with security, with rights. I believe that can happen, but we have to actually show some commitment to it.

[Michael Duncan]

Dude, it's just, bro, it's like if you took ChatGPT and he sent it to work at McKinsey and then you gave it a goatee to try to look like he's tough. Yeah, that's what you get. He did not give a single answer at all.

[John Ashbrook]

He did the consultant speak at the end of the zoom call. Where he's like, all right, well, we're just gonna take a step back, and we're gonna. We're gonna look at this, and we'll connect. Circle back offline.

[Josh Holmes]

Well, you circle back in circle.

[John Ashbrook]

So we got to offline this, and we'll road test it, and then we'll figure out where we can be, work through workshop. Well, we got to look through the workflow.

[Josh Holmes]

It's got to workflow. Workshop it.

[Michael Duncan]

And circling back, I think we circle back on this after we raise bread prices, and then we see if we can get a Tuesday solution to work. Like, he thinks he can get away with this. I'm so happy he's running for president. I cannot wait.

[Josh Holmes]

Well, because, of course, the funniest part about it is that the base of his support for running for president in the first place was, like, very affluent white people who have definitive views about the state of Israel. Right. Many of them are Jewish. They think. They believe Israel is a real place and that, like, the whole Palestinian Hamas thing, not ideal. Like, that's the thing. That's where this guy has derived much of his financial support, if not his political support. And then all of a sudden, he's in Michigan, where, of course, as we know, there's a Michigan problem.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah, but he doesn't live anywhere close to that in Michigan. He's up there in Traverse City riding bicycles.

[Josh Holmes]

No, he's a statewide guy, though. His ambitions are statewide, Michael.

[John Ashbrook]

I don't think they are.

[Michael Duncan]

He's running.

[John Ashbrook]

He's not gonna run for Congress. No, he's gonna run for president.

[Michael Duncan]

He's running for president. He's not gonna run for governor.

[John Ashbrook]

I don't think he's gonna run statewide in Michigan.

[Michael Duncan]

But whether he is or not, I bet he got some polling done in Dearborn. He was like, so I'm. So you're telling me I pull 0% among black people and 0% among Muslims? Like, why do they hate me? Like, why is it that I get no support among these communities? Oh, well, I guess I'll run for president. Maybe that'll work.

[Josh Holmes]

Dude. So the Pod bros are like, do you believe in a Palestinian state? And, like, in his micro computer that he's got going on in his head, he's like a. Don't piss off the base of my support. Second of all, Michigan problem with the. I can't actually think that I have to be pro Hamas at some level. So let me just a word salad of three paragraphs. Does anybody know what it is that that guy said?

[John Ashbrook]

No idea.

[Josh Holmes]

What's the position. Is it or not? He talked about two State. Two State would imply that you do believe that the Palestinians deserve a state. Right, because that was the question.

[John Ashbrook]

I think the computer shut down, and he was trying to reboot, and he's like, all right, how do I pull up the pitch deck I used to have?

[Josh Holmes]

I love it. All right, so the next one, Swalwell.

[Comfortably Smug]

Mm, another favorite.

[Josh Holmes]

God, he's just so. He's just so much content. You could do a full show on this cat every day. Clip two, please.

[Michael Duncan]

Instead, we're seeing these masked agents roaming.

[Josh Holmes]

Around like bank robbers. Roaming around like antifa. Remember that boogeyman that is always stirred up by the other side?

[Michael Duncan]

That's what these masked agents look like.

[Comfortably Smug]

For those of you who are audio only, what you missed is the poor man's TED Talk in a high school auditorium.

[Josh Holmes]

He's talking to children.

[Comfortably Smug]

He's wearing the white tennis shoes and the blue jeans and the T shirt. He's just a regular person. He never dated a Chinese spy. Don't ask him about that. He's talking about the future of democracy.

[Josh Holmes]

He never definitely didn't allegedly leak classified intel. During the course of.

[John Ashbrook]

He's had multiple leaks. His most famous leak is when he pooped himself on national television. Remember this? Where he, like, sharted.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah. And he had to deny it.

[John Ashbrook]

He denied the shart.

[Comfortably Smug]

We don't. There is no conclusive evidence that that fart was productive. Michael, you.

[John Ashbrook]

You have to.

[Comfortably Smug]

You have to be accurate.

[John Ashbrook]

That is true. Variety program Bman is correcting me. Although I did see people who put the heat map over his television appearance, in which I believe there was a shart. I cannot confirm that this is a comedy show. We're laughing. We're laughing. But I believe he did poop himself.

[Josh Holmes]

It did look like that. But you can't admit that. How else are you gonna pick up Chinese espionage agents? I mean, even they have standards.

[John Ashbrook]

Well, okay, so my favorite thing about that clip is, like, he goes in on antifa. He's like, they look like antifa. Remember that thing they made up? And it's like, bro, you just referenced the thing. So then clearly the thing's real. And so it's like. It's like, oh, shit, I made the mistake of telling the truth.

[Josh Holmes]

And then he tries to disabuse himself.

[Michael Duncan]

Of, oh, they made it all up in real time. He was like, they're like, antifa. And then he's like, oh, shoot, I remember my side's supposed to like, antifa. Yeah, say that They're a boogeyman. You saw the audience for folks on video. You see the audience just like moving antifa. But they're the good guys.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah, we thought we like it was antifa.

[Michael Duncan]

Amazing. Yeah, amazing in real time.

[Comfortably Smug]

There are probably people in that audience who are Antifa.

[John Ashbrook]

100% college campus. I guarantee.

[Josh Holmes]

You can't imagine out of your, I.

[Michael Duncan]

Mean, can you remember being like, hey.

[Josh Holmes]

Swalwell's here, I got to go see that.

[Michael Duncan]

We would see takes on, on, on X of people saying like, you know what happened on D day? Antifa stormed that beach and it's like, oh my God, we're. Thank God we're past that level of brain damage. Being like mainstreamed of like people first were like, no, you know, actually the allies were the antifa in World War II and today Antifa is fighting Trump. Like we're way past that. He didn't get the memo. He was like, they're masked like antifa. Oh shit, wait a minute. This is a pro antifa crowd. Antifa was made up. Guys.

[John Ashbrook]

I gotta tell you, if someone like Swalwell showed up at my college campus, that's exactly the moment. I was mixing the jungle juice.

[Josh Holmes]

Oh yeah.

[John Ashbrook]

I was not there in attendance.

[Josh Holmes]

We wouldn't know.

[John Ashbrook]

Wouldn't know. No idea. I can only hope that the people who sat through all of that got some sort of course credit.

[Josh Holmes]

Well, I think they probably got an intelligence fortune cookie. But other than that.

[Michael Duncan]

America is back. Thanks to President Trump and Leader John Thune's working family tax cuts. We stopped the biggest tax hike in history, but that's only the beginning. The big beautiful bill also cuts taxes on tips and overtime, secures the border, finishes the wall and protects Medicaid for Americans, not illegals. Leader Thune and Senate Republicans got President Trump's conservative agenda done, providing real relief for every hard working American that's up early and home late. We're bringing manufacturing jobs back home and making America great again. Tell Leader John Thune and Senate Republicans thank you for delivering President Trump's agenda. Learn more@one nationamerica.org Chuck Schumer, one of.

[Josh Holmes]

Our favorite battering ram. He's like a speed bag. I mean you just, there's no end to the amount. You could literally walk with him all day and do a full show like swell will just on the things that this guy says. So he's got, he's got a hot take on DC on this whole crime situation. Clip three please. I walk around all the time.

[Michael Duncan]

I wake up early in the morning Sometimes.

[Comfortably Smug]

And take a nice walk as the sun is rising around some of the Capitol and the other monuments and things.

[Josh Holmes]

And I never feel they're full of it. Dude, it's so good for so many reasons. One, he's never looking at the camera. Like, he's staring at a computer, like, hello, Hello.

[John Ashbrook]

Is this thing on?

[Josh Holmes]

Hello. How do you speak into this thing? Am I doing an interview, bro?

[Michael Duncan]

He. He's like 3,000 years old, hunched over, looking at the keyboard, trying to, like, stay awake, talking about how, you know, I'm super active. I walk around D.C. and it's safe. Number one, he doesn't walk anywhere. Number two, if he does, is with, like, an armed entourage.

[Josh Holmes]

Italian.

[John Ashbrook]

Right? Like three Suburbans and, like, a whole. And it's. That's been the last 15 years of his life. I can't think of a person less capable of weighing in on what the average person has in D.C. when it comes to crime.

[Josh Holmes]

This is what's so funny, because both Johnny and I worked in the office that he inhabits. Right. As a minority. He's been in under capital security for 15 years.

[John Ashbrook]

Right.

[Josh Holmes]

He doesn't have the faintest clue.

[Michael Duncan]

No.

[Josh Holmes]

About. About it. That's why he has imaginary friends to try to tell him about the, like, real life or whatever.

[Comfortably Smug]

Joe and Eileen Bailey.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah, right, right. But I mean, I'm telling you, from working in that environment for 10 years, you have, like, six people, armed guards that move with you at two suburbans that move with you everywhere. It doesn't matter whether you're back home in New York or you're in D.C. the likelihood of you encountering anything at all that people aren't just, like, jumping ugly on is 0.

[John Ashbrook]

0.

[Josh Holmes]

You don't encounter any. Like, if someone so much as, like, screams a word at you with that security battalion that he's got, like, they're gone. Well.

[John Ashbrook]

And it's not just that he rolls deep with a bunch of security, like, they are pre. Clearing the next place he's gonna be.

[Josh Holmes]

Exactly.

[John Ashbrook]

You know what I'm saying? It's like if he decided he wanted to have a hamburger and go to a restaurant, those officers are there an hour beforehand sweeping the place.

[Josh Holmes]

He acts like he's sitting on Abe Lincoln's.

[Michael Duncan]

You know, that's the thing that bothers me, is he's such a piece of garbage for it. Because that's so condescending.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah, yeah.

[Michael Duncan]

Like, look at the actual facts. Go into a CVS in D.C. you know why the toothpaste is locked up. You know why the deodorant is locked up, not because it's a safe town. Use your head. What is his problem with trying to make this city safe for people?

[Josh Holmes]

And that's happened on his watch.

[Michael Duncan]

100%.

[Josh Holmes]

He watched it all happen. I mean.

[Comfortably Smug]

Well, the problem is that libs are not upset by deodorant and toothpaste being locked up. I mean, to be honest with you, they don't buy it anyway. They never have, so they don't even notice.

[Michael Duncan]

Absolute.

[Josh Holmes]

Just a flamethrower over there.

[Michael Duncan]

Stinking ass Schumer, bro. Get his ass, Astro.

[Josh Holmes]

And they call it the poop hole loophole.

[John Ashbrook]

And they do it in secret.

[Michael Duncan]

That's what they do.

[Josh Holmes]

They get away with it.

[Comfortably Smug]

They do. They always get away with it.

[Josh Holmes]

All right, so the third clip there's a South Carolina Democrat. This is courtesy of the Charleston Police Department. Can we see this video courtesy Charleston Police Department? Who is your biological father? Would you please share that with the world? Hey, Nancy.

[John Ashbrook]

Right now?

[Josh Holmes]

Cause I only promised that I would.

[Michael Duncan]

Not do this once I started this.

[Josh Holmes]

Campaign, because I can't do this once I start a campaign.

[Michael Duncan]

You better tell the world right now.

[Josh Holmes]

That what you did in the world of Congress was the greatest sin ever committed in the history of this nation.

[Comfortably Smug]

You know, we started this segment about Jungle Juice, and there was, like, a firm lamentation that people are not drinking Jungle Juice anymore. And I think the reason why is because he's drinking all of it.

[Josh Holmes]

Well, this is the Low country attorney, Mullins McLeod.

[Michael Duncan]

That is such a South Carolina name. That's the most South Carolina name of all time.

[Josh Holmes]

Mullins McLeod is a prominent attorney down there in the Low Country. He's announced his candidacy for the Democratic primary for governor on Monday. It doesn't feel like it's going that well.

[Michael Duncan]

Dude, here's what I would do. I would run that as an ad if I were him. This is South Carolina.

[Josh Holmes]

He's like, man, I get it.

[Michael Duncan]

South Carolina. Like, people think Florida's crazy. Dude, South Carolina is so bonkers. It's so crazy, it's out of control.

[Josh Holmes]

I love Charleston.

[Michael Duncan]

If I'm him, I run that. I run that.

[Josh Holmes]

I mean, he uses a racial slur, profanity, goes into an hour long rant. We just showed you a little clip of it. Charleston police responded to a battery.

[Michael Duncan]

To the battery.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah, to the battery. On May 2nd for a report of a man in his underwear yelling and causing a disturbance. Officers found this man, Mullins McLeod.

[John Ashbrook]

McLeod. I'm. I'm really disappointed in McLeod. Just speaking as Someone from the Scottish American community. A Duncan. Generally we can handle our alcohol.

[Josh Holmes]

He's let you down.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah, it's very disappointing.

[Josh Holmes]

It's disappointing.

[Michael Duncan]

I mean that's scotch drunk that guy is on.

[Comfortably Smug]

Well, we, we don't know.

[Josh Holmes]

That's not scotch.

[Comfortably Smug]

We, we don't know. Maybe this is pure unvarnished Liberal Democrat. And the south, that's possible too. We don't know.

[Michael Duncan]

Bring back the blue dog Dems.

[Josh Holmes]

Well, there's a racial slur, so you might be right about that.

[Michael Duncan]

Dude, I support that campaign launch. Brilliant.

[Josh Holmes]

Okay, well, well done. Mullins, McLeod.

[Michael Duncan]

Mullins, McLeod.

[Josh Holmes]

Anyway, we're not done. We got another one here. If you guys saw. So like there's a bunch of stuff in D.C. it's happening with new like federal, Federal agents coming in and cracking down on crime.

[Michael Duncan]

Laws are back.

[John Ashbrook]

Right.

[Josh Holmes]

But it's not just what you expect. Like you know, the bike riding preteens were out there like just robbing, carjacking and doing whatever. Like that was kind of the focus. They're taking all crime off the streets. Well, it turns out that there's a, an element within the Washington D.C. a liberal progressive element of like country club folks.

[John Ashbrook]

Oh no.

[Josh Holmes]

That are around there. Oh no. And some of them got caught up in a touch of trouble, shall we say? Let's check out clip four.

[Michael Duncan]

So for our audio only listeners, that guy just threw a sandwich at a cop and instantly ran.

[Josh Holmes]

So the dude's in a pink polo and a pair of khaki shorts, belt and like a fairly well appointed.

[Michael Duncan]

That's a Subway sandwich.

[Josh Holmes]

And he's, I mean look, he's running.

[Comfortably Smug]

But it's clearly not like a 4, 440 guy. His feet look like they're in quicksand.

[Josh Holmes]

He's got to be 40 years old.

[Michael Duncan]

Can I get, can I give a breakdown? Can we play that clip again?

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah, let's, let's put this up. Let's get it one more time.

[Michael Duncan]

So this is late at night. It's like a Thursday. It's a Thursday night. He's at Subway. So he already got shot down. He didn't, he didn't close anything tonight. So he's already in a bad place. He's drunk, he's alone, he's like, you know what? I'm going to take a stand. I'm going to try to become a hero for Blue sky.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah, he was playing, he was playing a waited out game at U Street. Larry's trying to get some poor gal who had too much to drink.

[John Ashbrook]

You think maybe he was Hanging out in the basement in Saint X. Yeah, totally. That's all around stacks.

[Josh Holmes]

I don't know if it is or not. It was when I was in my twenties. But I like, this is exactly the.

[John Ashbrook]

Kind of guy, if you couldn't close in the basement at st. X, like 15 years ago, you were a loser.

[Josh Holmes]

A loser. And it strikes me that this guy.

[Michael Duncan]

I mean, he's got a 2am Subway sandwich. The guy's not a closer to begin with.

[Josh Holmes]

His name is Sean Charles Dunn.

[Michael Duncan]

And the story gets better, right?

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah. So it turns out that the man facing is now facing a federal assault charge because he threw the sandwich at the cop.

[John Ashbrook]

That's right.

[Josh Holmes]

Which is just like the dumbest thing in the face. It was a Subway sandwich.

[Comfortably Smug]

Was it? Do we think it was like an Italian BMT cold cut combo? Cut combo.

[Josh Holmes]

Taking a shot at the Italians.

[Comfortably Smug]

Well, I'm just curious.

[Josh Holmes]

That guy's clearly not Italian.

[Comfortably Smug]

I'm just wondering what the order might have been. You know, I thought I saw some lettuce flying off of that. Yeah, well, it could have been anything, but probably not like meatball hoagie.

[Josh Holmes]

I think that's probably right. Well, I don't know. I mean, it's just his tastes weren't all that discerning because he threw it directly at a federal officer. And it turns out the Attorney General has now weighed in. He's facing federal charges. So it's not going well for Sean Charles Dunn, but it's gotten even worse in that he is employed at the Department of Justice.

[Michael Duncan]

Oh, boy.

[Josh Holmes]

A career attorney at the Department of Justice. This cat throwing the sandwich. So it's now been verified. Pam Bondi is weighed in. He's no longer working at the Department of Justice, as it turns out, and.

[Michael Duncan]

He'S facing felony A sold charge. I mean, like, this is what I voted for.

[John Ashbrook]

We talked about this a little bit in the production meeting and I think it was Holmes that made the point that, like he's turning in that cold cut combo for a tube steak when he goes to the brig.

[Josh Holmes]

I mean, the holding cell in D.C. on Saturday night is not great.

[Michael Duncan]

I mean, can you imagine? It's a Subway sandwich. So, like, it's not $5 anymore, but he's still getting a foot long. Oh, oh, Just a Friday episode, folks.

[Josh Holmes]

Forced fed to kielbasa.

[John Ashbrook]

Oh, my gosh.

[Josh Holmes]

That's what's happening.

[John Ashbrook]

Extra jardiniere. So look, it is, it is funny, but I think we'd be remiss if we didn't point out that this is A serious problem when it comes to the government in D.C. and that is our government is made up of people that like crime.

[Josh Holmes]

Like, that he's upset.

[Michael Duncan]

All these, like, these, these, like showboat libs.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah.

[Michael Duncan]

The ones who think that, like, if I do this, I'll be on Blue sky and on Reddit and everyone's gonna think I'm a hero. But everybody, everyone's gonna stand up and clap like libs. Get it through your head. Welcome back to the real world. It's no longer the stupid shit of you can punch cops and get away with it. You can do this stupid performative shit and resist and everyone's gonna stand up and cop. That does not happen.

[John Ashbrook]

It doesn't happen.

[Michael Duncan]

That's a delusion in your head. And now the real world is back.

[Josh Holmes]

But think about the mental illness involved in doing what it is that he did. It's like, he may disagree with federalizing D.C. or he may like, crime or whatever. I was suggest that a guy in a pink shirt is roaming around U Street at whatever hour in the morning. He should like cops more than he does. But anyway, like, he's made the decision that because of the decision of President Trump to do all of this, he's going to throw a sandwich at some poor officer who's doing his job. Right. I mean, it's not like this guy, it's like, how do you blame the cop?

[Michael Duncan]

I just wish.

[Josh Holmes]

That's what I mean.

[Michael Duncan]

I just wish the cops could have beat his ass.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah, well, they chased him down. We didn't see the end of the video.

[Michael Duncan]

They just like handcuffed him. And they were very professional. Right. And they did the right thing.

[Josh Holmes]

No billy club whatsoever, man.

[Michael Duncan]

Like, that's the thing is, like, all of them should be issued billy clubs.

[Josh Holmes]

No, he should have gotten. He should have gotten that. You remember the, like the, the old school 90s Billy Club where they would go like, right, left, right, left, and.

[Michael Duncan]

That'S why crime went down.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah, yeah.

[Michael Duncan]

Like, we need tasers and billy clubs and we need examples. It's time to start making examples which.

[Josh Holmes]

You know, laid out.

[Michael Duncan]

But that's the problem is I get it. I know that, like, President Trump and his administration are doing everything correctly and they buy the book and that's why they're winning. But I just love seeing criminals get the shit kicked out of. I used to watch Cops and I loved it, bro. Yeah.

[Comfortably Smug]

If the guy has his shirt off, you know, he's, you know, he's going to the Brick.

[Josh Holmes]

That's right.

[Michael Duncan]

They're pulling this guy over in Florida. He's got no shirt. Here we go. WrestleMania.

[Josh Holmes]

Full bad boys. Bad boys about to go down. It's going down anyway, so it leaves us our question of the day, which you know now, you having seen all of this. His last meal was a sub subway and he threw it. He took a departure from his regularly scheduled stop after that, which is presumably back home to his shitty apartment and miserable lifestyle. He's now in the pen.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah. Getting the tube stick.

[Josh Holmes]

What's his next meal? What's the next meal?

[John Ashbrook]

We really are doing that.

[Josh Holmes]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[John Ashbrook]

Hell yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

Does he get the tube steak?

[Michael Duncan]

Our audience?

[Josh Holmes]

Does he get the kielbasu?

[Michael Duncan]

Our audience is about to drop some bangers.

[Josh Holmes]

Dude, I want bangers. It's Friday. We gotta have fun on Friday. So why'd you listen to this Tuesday.

[Michael Duncan]

Episode when we read these, man.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah, like Tuesday, we're gonna cover some news. We'll give you something to think about on Thursday.

[John Ashbrook]

So that's my favorite part of the Friday show is we come into Tuesday and there's a lot of, like, serious news to cover. And we get to the comments and it's like, we're still on hinge from Friday. He's gonna be choking down the kielbasa in the brig.

[Josh Holmes]

You're right.

[Michael Duncan]

You're right.

[Josh Holmes]

It is a little bit of a departure, but it is something that you all have been fantastic at. So let let us know on all of that. Okay? So when you like and subscribe to the Ruthless Variety Program, we read all of your comments. I think you all know those of you who have left comments in that that is now true because we respond to an awful lot of them. Anyway, your question of the week, of the day from Thursday was, what are these paid protesters? Remember, the Source is throwing 20M at these things.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

And then there was the guy who runs the thing that was called like.

[Comfortably Smug]

Build a crowd a crowd or something.

[Michael Duncan]

Or rent a crowd.com, which I loved.

[Josh Holmes]

Your life is like, I will make your unpopular thing popular. Basically. Yeah. Seem like it's popular.

[Michael Duncan]

I believe in nothing but SEO.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah, yeah, totally. And he's like, 400% increase. It's fantastic. We love this. So anyway, we asked what these people who make a living doing this do during the day when they're not protesting something they don't care about. And your comments were great. And to do that, we always start with a voice.

[Comfortably Smug]

First one comes from Turan Galila and they write. The paid protesters also spend a lot of time administering trans studies in Tanzania. And promoting LGBTQI plus in the African nation of Lesotho, which nobody has ever heard of. It's parenthetical. Love the program. Thanks for the free sticker, by the way. I'll probably put it on my violin case.

[Josh Holmes]

Oh, an artist.

[Comfortably Smug]

We have a cultured audience.

[Josh Holmes]

A cultured audience.

[John Ashbrook]

And also Taronga Leela, clearly a fan of Futurama, which is a great show.

[Michael Duncan]

Oh, is that I was gonna bring up. When you speak of the violin case, what's the name of the California senator? She passed away. She was super old.

[Josh Holmes]

Feinstein.

[Michael Duncan]

Feinstein. Did you guys see that her, like, estate is being auctioned?

[Josh Holmes]

No, I didn't see this.

[Comfortably Smug]

So, like, her family estate.

[Michael Duncan]

Her family is, like, took what they wanted and they're, like, auctioning off a bunch of stuff. She has, like, seven Stradivarius.

[John Ashbrook]

Wow.

[Comfortably Smug]

Are you kidding me?

[Michael Duncan]

That's how loaded these people get. It was insane.

[Josh Holmes]

What do we talk? What's a Stradivarius?

[Michael Duncan]

It's like, the finest violins ever made in 1700s and.

[Josh Holmes]

Really?

[Michael Duncan]

Yeah.

[Comfortably Smug]

$250,000 a pop.

[Josh Holmes]

Shut up.

[Michael Duncan]

She's got, like, seven of them.

[Josh Holmes]

Are you kidding me?

[Michael Duncan]

I'm being done. She's like, did she even play? She probably just, like, throws him in the fucking parlor.

[Josh Holmes]

Someone just gave him to her.

[Michael Duncan]

No, she has a parlor to begin with.

[John Ashbrook]

She's like, you just made up. She had a parlor.

[Josh Holmes]

I know. That's the best part.

[Michael Duncan]

She has, like, 19 karat diamonds. It was insane. It's like, that's my public servant in California. That's a great line of work, by the way.

[Josh Holmes]

The only, like, one of the last Democrats who had any. Santa. She was crazy left wing lunatic.

[Michael Duncan]

Well, she owned those, like, environmentalist kids. But God bless.

[Josh Holmes]

That's what I'm talking about.

[Michael Duncan]

Probably got her into heaven. Yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

Where she owned, like, the.

[Michael Duncan]

Where she told those little kids, she was like, listen, you little stupid kids, we covered in the program, climate change is fake. Yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

She basically did say that God's like.

[Michael Duncan]

All right, fine, you're up here.

[Josh Holmes]

Here's another stradivarius. Anyway. Comment 2 Dunks.

[John Ashbrook]

This is from Jeff Eller. Jeff writes, we have seen a lot of these protesters. Being older people, they're most likely retired and showing millennials and Gen Z a new side hustle.

[Josh Holmes]

Thank a boomer.

[John Ashbrook]

Thank a bo on that. I love that.

[Josh Holmes]

This new side hustle. It's not just. Only fans, folks. You can whore yourself up right on the street.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah.

[Michael Duncan]

I love seeing the photos. People started posting wearing their think a boomer shirt. Oh, yeah, from it's fruitlesspodcast.com store. Thank a boomer. The Greatest Generation, which by the way.

[Josh Holmes]

Slick new website, I might add.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah, we did just launch that new website.

[Josh Holmes]

Old Harunx has been working. He not only sews the. The gear, he works the tubes.

[John Ashbrook]

I do the tubes. I connect the tubes on the Internet. It's important. You gotta connect the tubes.

[Josh Holmes]

Very well done. All right, Smuggles, what do we got for comment 3?

[Michael Duncan]

Comment 3 from Laura. My theory on what the protesters do as a day job is discussing, quote, influencer content. Like that Disney adult trash plus park offers by day woke rent a mob by night. Dude. Plus, I'm convinced Duncan put those clowns on the map. I think they're probably getting like 3.3views a video until Duncan brought them up. And now they probably get like a million views from Minions being like, you suck at dude.

[Josh Holmes]

If you missed the episode where we talked about Plus Size Park Hoppers, Duncan brought to our attention here on the variety program, there's an Instagram account called Plus Size.

[John Ashbrook]

Well, so it was entirely parallel thinking because Lee put it in the show sheet and he was like, so I guess we gotta cover this. These women are the worst. They go to Disney. And I was like, oh, yeah, plus sized Park Hoppers. He's like, what? You know this? And I was like, no, pal, let me give you an education because I'm a regular consumer of this content. It's disgusting.

[Comfortably Smug]

The old man. The old man knows the Internet well.

[Josh Holmes]

He does. If there's one thing he understands, it's the underside of the American intelligence, which is. It's an ugly place sometimes. Parkside. But it's a popular thing, right?

[Michael Duncan]

What was that Nicholas Cage movie where he has to like, watch video of, like, I guess snuff films and shit. And he's like, I'll disturb that. Duncan. That's Duncan having to watch Plus Size. He's like, oh, my God, no. Why did they make me do this for Ruthless?

[Josh Holmes]

I'm like, I did not think that snuff films would make its way into this.

[John Ashbrook]

Like, I'm like Nick Cage with the. With the bees on me. The bees.

[Josh Holmes]

The bees wicker Man.

[John Ashbrook]

That's me and the Internet.

[Josh Holmes]

All right, I want to do a couple quick minutes on the thing you're going to be reading and hearing about all weekend long, which is this Trump Putin summit that they're doing in Alaska. So this is important for a variety of reasons. Let me just set the table for a minute. President Trump. This is according to Axios President Trump and Russian President Vladimir Putin will meet in Alaska on Friday to discuss the possibility of peace in Ukraine. Ukraine, the big picture. Trump and Putin have met before, but arguably never was so much on the line. Geopolitically, much, if not all of the focus will be on the war between Russia and Ukraine. Now I'm gonna stop on that. Look, this has been a interesting relationship for a lot of years, the first four years, of which there was a treacherous, I would say treasonous effort on behalf of the opposition party here in the United States, the Democrats, to try to convince the American electorate that President Trump was only president because of Vladimir Putin and because of Russia. The whole Russia gate, we've covered all of that. Right? And so everything that was done in that period of time was seen through that lens. Now, he leaves office, he comes back, he talks a lot about, on the campaign, how this is a war that never would have happened with Russia and Ukraine. He's right about it, 100% true. He's right about that. And we've covered this a lot. About Afghanistan, the void of American leadership, all this, that gave at least some courage to people like Putin. They can do what they want and America's not gonna do anything about it. He was kind of right in that regard. They started this war. It's still going. It's terrible, but it is what it is. And so Trump during the campaign is like, look, if there's anybody's gonna going to solve this, it's somebody with a relationship on all sides. I'm going to go in and see what I can do. And he starts these conversations, I think, in a pretty productive way. We obviously saw the Zelensky meeting in the Oval Office with JD Vance and Marco Rubio. And that went sideways in a hurry in large part because Zelensky was hoping that the Trump administration was going to have a definitive black and white. We're on one side, you're on the other. But that's not how you broker a deal.

[Michael Duncan]

Right.

[Josh Holmes]

And to understand Trump's foreign policy, you may agree with it or disagree with it, but if you understand it, he's a deal maker. Yes, he wants things to get done. He doesn't care what the establishment has thought for the last 50 years of how you get things done or how America needs to set a hard line and drive towards that line, and everything else will follow. He just views the world differently. And his whole thing is, if I have some credibility with Putin, I'm gonna use it to try to bring him to the table to see if we can figure out how to end this thing, which is an admirable goal in some ways. And you've seen NATO come out and be like, thank you for doing this. We appreciate the fact that you are engaged in this conversation. Incredible change from the first four years of the Trump administration. And now you've got this high level summit that comes in the backdrop of Putin basically pushing away from the table to say like, no deals, huge offensives in Ukraine, where they are continuing to wreak all kinds of havoc. And the Trump administration has responded by tagging in people like India, for example, where a trade deal between. We saw Modi come over to the Oval Office back in January or February, great meetings, talking about making India great again, trade deals on the table or whatever. But what wasn't discussed in that meeting was whether or not they would continue to buy Russian oil. Wasn't particularly interesting at that point in time. Once Putin gives the finger to President Trump and what he's trying to accomplish with peace here, now, that's a part of India's problem.

[Michael Duncan]

And that's. So I gotta say that's, that's such a genius move is. So I know when you first start hearing in the news about like, okay, we're gonna have some like Russia, Ukraine thing, I know a lot of folks like me, and you start being like, you're tuning out like this shit again. Because you're used to the Biden years of where like you're being told that like every American, you should throw everything you have into saving Ukraine. And this is the most important issue and the only way to do it is to write Zelensky a blank check. And you saw that, that attitude that Zelenskyy was taught of like the tail wagging the dog when he walked into that meeting that JD Was at, that Marco was at, that Trump was at, and he learned real quick, there's a new sheriff in town. The sheriff is back where you have someone who has actual credibility. The world saw Biden has zero credibility. When we saw the way that he had that disastrous pullout in Afghanistan, the whole world was like, so we don't need to take this Biden. Get serious. He's out to pasture. He's lost his mind. Trump is a whole nother thing. He turned Suleimani into salsa right when he told Iran, you stop messing around or I'm gonna take your nuclear program. He took that nuclear program. People believe him and they know that he will follow through on what he says. So when Russia and India still keep their oil deal in place, he's like, well, India, looks like you're getting taxed.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah. It looks like you don't have a trade deal.

[Michael Duncan]

So, boom. Make your choice. Like, you will either learn to play with the way Trump says you will, or he follows through. And he follows through.

[Comfortably Smug]

Right. Smug. You hit on something I was going to say is like, what is the source of that credibility? And it comes from two places. It comes from strength, which is what you talked about, turning soleimani into salsa. It also comes from competence. Russia saw what happened in Fordo. Russia saw the op that President Trump and his team and all of our brave pilots executed flawlessly and then pulled out of. And they're like.

[Josh Holmes]

And watch the rest of the world react to it.

[Comfortably Smug]

And watch the rest of the world react to it. And it's like, okay, wait a minute. It's not just that we don't know what he's gonna say or what he's gonna do. It's not just that we know he's a strong leader, but it's also that he is competent and capable of following through on his threats.

[Michael Duncan]

It's like that meme of like, do not fuck with America, because George Washington on Christmas Eve will cross a river and roll up on your army and kill everybody in their sleep. But Trump did where, like, America has, like, people who have been studying fordo for their entire life. For 20 years, they've mapped every inch of this facility. And we have pilots who will fly 34 hours and bomb that shit and fly back. Right.

[Josh Holmes]

We spent 15 years developing a new missile, a missile to hit that can actually go through the number of floors required to destroy the facility.

[Michael Duncan]

Right. That's credibility.

[John Ashbrook]

Let me preview, though.

[Comfortably Smug]

This is a man who wants peace. I'm sorry, go ahead.

[John Ashbrook]

Let me preview exactly what the liberal media going to say after this meeting between no deal, they'll say, and Trump. They're going to be like, what a gift. What? What a gift to Vladimir Putin, this autocratic dictator in Russia, platforming him. Platform. The legitimization of the Russian invasion into Ukraine brought to you by the American president. Right. And what they will ignore, obviously, is that in the last four years, when Joe Biden was president, he didn't bring peace. No. No. Peace happened between Ukraine and war broke Russia. In fact, no.

[Josh Holmes]

It is $400 billion lighter in the pocket.

[John Ashbrook]

In fact, let's. Let's rewind the tape and recognize that Putin invaded Crimea when who was president? Barack Obama.

[Michael Duncan]

That's right.

[John Ashbrook]

Right. And he invaded the rest of Ukraine when Joe Biden Was president?

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah.

[John Ashbrook]

Wow, that's so weird. It's almost like this isn't Donald Trump's fault. Maybe it's the Democrats fault.

[Comfortably Smug]

They're weak.

[John Ashbrook]

And so Donald Trump is looking to solve a problem that the Democrats continually make and that is projecting the weakness on the world stage that empowers people like Vladimir Putin to think they can invade their neighbors.

[Josh Holmes]

And one of the things that actually. So I was doing Special Report on Tuesday with Brett and he was talking about, he's with the delegation, like he's riding Air Force One with, with the President for all of this. As you would like, most serious newsman in the business. You're gonna want to make sure he sees this with his own eyes. But he was asking about it and what our takes were and I did, a Democrat, very nice lady sitting next to me, but what she was saying is like, well, you know, this is obviously not very well planned because there is no pre negotiated solution. There's no memo agreement, there's no all these things that you hope to get out of the meeting. Because Trump said to open press in a press conference. I don't know, like, I'm going to tell him exactly what it is that we want to deal with and we'll see how he reacts to it. And I can tell you pretty quickly whether or not we're gonna get to something or not. And I may walk out of there and be like, well, good luck to you, it's not gonna work out. Or I may come out with some kind of a deal that we should talk about more with your European allies and everybody else who's remarkably sensible, but her whole point of view is like, well, we don't, you know, we need.

[John Ashbrook]

A memorandum of understanding and if we don't have that, we can't have the meeting. And it's like this entire philosophy of what they've done in foreign policy has fucking failed time and time again.

[Josh Holmes]

That was my takeaway. It is, I only had like six minutes, so I couldn't get into that. But I, but I, I thought about it a lot afterwards and I was like, man, think about how they operate.

[Michael Duncan]

Yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

Like this is how the left operates and how, you know, it's not even just the left, the right. You know, Republican presidents have done it too. But their entire thing is sitting in the high stakes meeting like this. We don't know which way this is going to go. And it's a failure if you didn't pre negotiate something. And they're basically just like, like filming a commercial.

[Michael Duncan]

Yep.

[Josh Holmes]

What's the point of electing a president?

[Michael Duncan]

I hate them so much.

[Comfortably Smug]

It's all they do. And I think you raise a very, very important point, because President Trump has not only demonstrated military strength and military competence, but he has demonstrated the same thing on the diplomatic side. Look at what happened in Europe. He walked in and they're like, you know what we're gonna do 5% today?

[Josh Holmes]

2%? You want 3%? How about 5%?

[Comfortably Smug]

Right? He's got a diplomatic head that the left will never give him credit for. This guy wants peace. And he has demonstrated the ability to exercise both military might and diplomatic might.

[Michael Duncan]

And that hits it right on the head, is, I am so sick of. There is, like, a diplomatic Ivy League class in this country of your. Like, Kerry's like, John Kerry is the Secretary of State.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah, he's doing it.

[Michael Duncan]

And he's like, well, here's what I was taught, you know, in my years.

[John Ashbrook]

On Nantucket, Samantha Power is doing roundtables in North Africa with women who've had their genitals mutilated.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah.

[John Ashbrook]

And being like, we're gonna solve this for you and we're gonna do nothing.

[Michael Duncan]

And where did that shit get us? Is nowhere.

[Josh Holmes]

So they can sit on some international.

[John Ashbrook]

Reward and be paid millions upon millions.

[Michael Duncan]

These people do not know solutions. What we have seen since President Trump has taken office is if you didn't get it before now, you see the definition of America. First, President Trump now says to Europe, listen, number one, you're all gonna hit your levels with NATO. NATO is thrilled. Like, wow. So everyone is anting up the amount that you promised. Thank you, President Trump. He says, secondly, the days of just, like, handouts and blank checks are over. We will sell American arms made in America by American workers to Europe, and then you can hand them over to Ukraine. Europe's like, great, we'll do that. We will send billions of dollars to America. We will buy your weapons, we'll give them to Ukraine, and they can shoot them at Russians. Great deal. So he's turned a conflict, which was a loss, where the US had given Zelensky a blank check of being like, oh, this is Joe Biden. He's asleep at the wheel. But like, lizard person, Jake Sherman thinks, or Jake Sullivan thinks that like, well, if we give you a blank check and hand over taxpayer dollars, that's all we need to do. No accountability is back, whether it's with NATO, whether it's Europe. And Putin is going to learn it, too. He has seen it already with arms that were sold to Europe. He's already seeing Trump is serious.

[Josh Holmes]

I agree. I'm a late convert to a lot of this, to be honest with you. Because, look, I mean, for those of us who are in government for a long time and had, you know, national security briefings and all kinds of different things, like there was no secret of who Vladimir Putin is, right? He's a KGB guy. You know what he's up to, you know what his ambitions are, at least with Ukraine, if not like far beyond that. I mean, it's not a secret. And it always felt to me in the first four years is that there was a certain amount of naivete that went into dealing with him. Like President Trump was dealing with him, like he was giving him the benefit of the doubt. Reminded me a little bit of like the George W. Bush early. Like, I looked into his soul thing and I was like, well, that didn't pan out, but you've got 20 years removed from that. Everybody should know that. Like, that didn't pan out or Hillary Clinton's hard reset.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah, the reset button.

[Josh Holmes]

You know what I mean? Like all that we already know. We know. We've. There's a lot of water that's gone under the bridge.

[John Ashbrook]

We saw it in Ukraine. And when people were calling this some sort of regional dispute, I so remind everyone that like Putin tried to sack the government in Kiev. Like, like it wasn't like he was like, these, the Donbas. We have to clear the Donbas because this is, this is territory that is.

[Josh Holmes]

But also during the Olympics, formed an alliance with Xi in China, right. In a very high profile summit.

[John Ashbrook]

He's a bad gu.

[Josh Holmes]

Not a regional dispute, right? Like, we're talking about some big players here that have a huge impact on the American economy and global security. And so this has always been a very big deal. Where I've come around on with Trump is, all right, I'm gonna give you the benefit of the doubt, but make sure that you earn that, because the second that you don't, I'm gonna go the other way. And now India's paying the price, right? So it's not just an American dispute against Russia. It's now an Indian dispute, it's not a Middle Eastern dispute, it's now a European dispute because he forced them to not buy oil from Russia. Like, you're talking about a global economic problem. And if you want to know why it is that Vladimir Putin is in Alaska, it's not cuz he wants to have a cup of coffee with Donald J. Trump. It's because his economy is going to rely on.

[Michael Duncan]

He's been getting phone calls of being like, bro, knock that shit off. Yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

It's like, dude, hey bud, they just took all of our yachts. Yeah. And then it was, oh, we can't sell anything abroad.

[Michael Duncan]

Yeah. He put a 50% tax on all the stuff that we're trying to sell. Knock that shit off, dude.

[Comfortably Smug]

But if you listen to the intelligence community over the last four years before Trump, they're like, no, Putin's a machine. Putin's a machine. Donald Trump steps in the rain, he's like, he's not a machine, he is a man and I can take him.

[Josh Holmes]

Oh, that's a full rock. You're doing a full rock. Yeah, Chasing the chicken.

[John Ashbrook]

And he's at the top of the mountain.

[Michael Duncan]

I love that part.

[Josh Holmes]

Lift the log.

[Michael Duncan]

Lift the log. Lift it.

[Comfortably Smug]

No easy way out.

[Michael Duncan]

You know the one story I love?

[Josh Holmes]

The tiger, the cream of the crop.

[Comfortably Smug]

No, no, Shortcut home.

[Michael Duncan]

The one story I want an update on is what happened to those North Korean soldiers who got the Internet for the first time.

[Josh Holmes]

They're still jerking off in Dogma. Those guys, they've had priapism since mid December. They didn't have the 1 800. If it's after four hours, you gotta call a doctor. They didn't know. They didn't know. It's such a good non fighting shit.

[Michael Duncan]

What happened to them? Can we get an update?

[Josh Holmes]

But also, I don't know if you know, this is very like low key news that happened day before yesterday or whatever where like there was a Russian meeting between North Korea and high levels of the Russian government. And they promised that they're gonna work together more closely. And it's like that tells you more about the footing that Vladimir Putin finds himself with, with going into this meeting. Anything else you like, we don't know.

[Michael Duncan]

That's not great. North Korea.

[Josh Holmes]

Okay, great. Like do whatever it is that you're gonna do. Like the China thing is one thing. And by the way, she is like, enjoy, right? I mean, you notice he's not at that meeting.

[Michael Duncan]

He's in a tough spot.

[Josh Holmes]

He's doing his own thing. He's probably gonna do.

[Michael Duncan]

His sailors are sailing into each other.

[Josh Holmes]

If I'm betting, If I'm betting, I bet that, that Trump and Xi have some kind of a summit in October, November. Because it's his own thing. Because it's xi's own thing.

[Michael Duncan]

Dude, that would be tough. Tough.

[Josh Holmes]

Look, you know what I mean? Like it's, it's. They're now, look, I don't know what's going to come.

[Michael Duncan]

She's going to be like, listen, man. Hey, man.

[Josh Holmes]

Hey, man.

[Michael Duncan]

I didn't tell him to do this. No, it isn't.

[Josh Holmes]

It wasn't me.

[Michael Duncan]

His ass is crazy.

[Comfortably Smug]

But, but like with under.

[Josh Holmes]

I want. Oh, no, that's fine. We're good with it.

[Michael Duncan]

I'm not going to do anything.

[Comfortably Smug]

Four years with Joe Biden and Democrats asking mother, may I to Xi into Putin and to everybody else. And Donald Trump steps into the stage and he is like, no, I am in charge. This is exactly what the world needs. This is what America needs, is what we deserve.

[Josh Holmes]

So one clip to end this thing. Clip five, please.

[John Ashbrook]

Should face any consequences if Vladimir Putin.

[Michael Duncan]

Does not agree to stop the war.

[John Ashbrook]

After your meeting on Friday?

[Michael Duncan]

Yes, they will.

[Josh Holmes]

Well, yeah.

[Michael Duncan]

What will. There will be consequences.

[Josh Holmes]

Tariffs.

[Michael Duncan]

There will be.

[Josh Holmes]

I don't have to say. There will be very severe consequences. Yes, go. There you go.

[Comfortably Smug]

Hell yeah.

[Michael Duncan]

Right?

[Josh Holmes]

I don't think there should be any further questions. And you should feel very confident in your American president as they're representing your interests.

[Michael Duncan]

Yeah, it's wild the way that the libs tried to attack him. The most is on foreign policy. And honestly, that's where his record is the strongest.

[Josh Holmes]

Strongest.

[Michael Duncan]

Unbelievable.

[Josh Holmes]

No question about it. Okay, boys, you ready for some variety?

[John Ashbrook]

Yes, always.

[Josh Holmes]

So I think you may have flagged this one. Smug mutant rabbits.

[Michael Duncan]

Mutant rabbits. This is the most. In all seriousness, this is the most important story in America right now. I'm being serious. Everyone thinks like, because it's. It sounds crazy, but it's real.

[Josh Holmes]

Well, it's a real problem. New York Post reported about it. Paper of record residents in Fort Collins, Colorado spoke about the shocking sight night in which black tentacles. That's tentacles, guys. Appear to be growing out of the head of cottontail rabbits. Despite the quill like appearance. A porcupine attack is not to blame. Is actually a rare virus.

[Michael Duncan]

Can we get a photo of them for. So for folks on YouTube. You see this? This is all real. Like, this looks terrifying. What the hell is that? This looks like a horror movie. This is really happening. So these. This is not AI this is not AI this is 100% real. This is from New York Post. This is. I mean, every major paper is reporting on this. There are these rabbits which have gotten some sort of a mutant virus and it's multiplying rapidly.

[Comfortably Smug]

Rabbits do multiply rapidly.

[Michael Duncan]

They do. And the virus even more so.

[Josh Holmes]

Rabbit fucking.

[Michael Duncan]

So Imagine that. So here's the thing. So they're calling it some, like, technical term they're calling some, like, papal something virus. It sounds like hpv. And I was like, papillonoma. No wonder, like, rabbits are the perfect host for like an HPV kind of a.

[Josh Holmes]

Wait, that's what this is, dude.

[Michael Duncan]

That's what they call it. Some like, papillomavirus, right? So I was like, oh my God, is this like mutant rabbit hpv? It looks like a zombie movie. And here's the thing is, can we get that image again?

[Josh Holmes]

It's disgusting.

[Michael Duncan]

Look at, they're growing like horns and tusks. Out of their heads, out of control.

[John Ashbrook]

It's like something from Last of Us.

[Michael Duncan]

Yes. And it's hap. It's uncontrollable.

[Josh Holmes]

A couple of these pictures taken over their whole head.

[Michael Duncan]

That's the thing, is it takes over. And if you see these, if you're in college, authorities are saying, do not approach them. Wait, and here's the thing.

[Josh Holmes]

Wait, is it human transmissible?

[Michael Duncan]

So authorities are like, oh, it's not. But they said the same thing about COVID I don't trust the authorities. I don't trust the experts.

[John Ashbrook]

You think Fauci did this?

[Michael Duncan]

I would not be surprised.

[Josh Holmes]

He created a bunch of horns.

[Michael Duncan]

I would not be surprised. Did he create some, like, puppy that he tortured that had horns and then it bit a rabbit? HP sounds like a fou, but like, rabbit. This is a horrific mutant type of rabbit. If you see it, shoot it. And don't approach the corpse. Just leave it to die. Maybe burn it, maybe throw like a Molotov at the corpse because you don't want other rabbits to eat it.

[Josh Holmes]

Just, you know, if you got a handy, like an extra.

[Michael Duncan]

I mean, this is what's going to happen is everyone's like, oh, wow, just a weird looking rabbit. And then we're all stuck in our houses. Like before that shit, before they tell us any of that, kill them all.

[Josh Holmes]

Next thing you know, we have a 4 trillion dollar bailout bill. The rest of us are sitting in masks.

[Michael Duncan]

It's always so easy. It's like when the problem shows up, everyone get guns and start shooting.

[Josh Holmes]

It's all fun and games till somebody bangs the HPV rabbit.

[Michael Duncan]

Someone brought AIDS from monkeys.

[Josh Holmes]

Oh, Jesus. That's just unbelievable.

[Michael Duncan]

If you see a dude with horns. Oh.

[Josh Holmes]

Gets lonely.

[Michael Duncan]

We all know what happened.

[Josh Holmes]

Gets real lonely in Fort Collins, clearly. Sorry, Colorado. We got a game that we want to play.

[John Ashbrook]

We do have a game and it's really an important game, I think, for this time of the year.

[Josh Holmes]

Well, it's an NFL based one. And I want to let you introduce it, but because it's NFL based, I just saw something that I feel like we need to put on.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

You know, we don't get to talk a lot about the Atlanta Falcons. I think it's a subpar team.

[John Ashbrook]

Oh, look at that block.

[Michael Duncan]

She's like, speaking of NFL, I don't.

[Josh Holmes]

Care for it a lot you're going.

[John Ashbrook]

To hear from Governor Count.

[Josh Holmes]

But they have. Well, I know, I know. They deserve it. Back to 1990 and Delta sucks.

[Michael Duncan]

Governor.

[Josh Holmes]

You'Re definitely getting a review from that. Anyway, it turns out that the local television station has. Maybe they're not like, totally well aware. Maybe they're too aware of who the new starting quarterback is. Can we put this up? There he is. It's Michael Penis Jr. Local WTOC 11 there in Hotlanta. They've got the starting quarterback. A unique interview, one to one with Mr. Penis.

[John Ashbrook]

Well, his name is Michael Penix Jr. He played college ball at both Indiana and Washington.

[Josh Holmes]

He did.

[John Ashbrook]

And they've made a horrible mistake.

[Josh Holmes]

Autocorrect is.

[John Ashbrook]

Well, so can I.

[Josh Holmes]

Tough deal on the Chiron.

[John Ashbrook]

Can I point out what I think is subtly the most offensive part of this Chiron? Because it says Michael Pennis Penis. It says Penis.

[Josh Holmes]

Yes.

[John Ashbrook]

Junior.

[Michael Duncan]

Yeah.

[John Ashbrook]

Junior. Penis Junior. It's like, it's like. It's one thing to put penis on the screen next to a guy's face. It's a whole nother thing to call him Penis Junior because then you're implying this man has a small unit and that's more offensive than putting penis on there.

[Josh Holmes]

It is a very perceptive point. That's why you listen to the Ruthless Variety. It's like kind of in depth analysis.

[John Ashbrook]

It's like the Whopper Jr. Yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

It's not large.

[John Ashbrook]

It's not large.

[Josh Holmes]

No, it's not a Whopper.

[John Ashbrook]

That's mean.

[Josh Holmes]

It's a Junior. Good call. All right, so what's this game that we're playing?

[John Ashbrook]

Well, okay, so I've noticed a lot of content around fantasy football. And you know, we love ball here on the Ruthless Variety program.

[Josh Holmes]

We do.

[John Ashbrook]

And so we thought it was important that we share our draft or drops for fantasy, but not fantasy football itself.

[Josh Holmes]

But we also know that the people listen to us for our political astute political stylings. And so we thought we'd mix and match.

[John Ashbrook]

So we're doing a Democrat fantasy draft.

[Josh Holmes]

Oh, I love.

[John Ashbrook]

This is such a good idea, dude.

[Josh Holmes]

Because the big question is like whether you draft somebody, whether you drop somebody, like, you know, I mean, everybody's focused on this. That plays fantasy these days. And so we just. Here we are.

[John Ashbrook]

We're looking at the state of play of Democrat politics, and we're going to tell you who to draft and who to drop. We have to start with the voice.

[Comfortably Smug]

Okay, Lee, I'm going to start with the first guy. I'm drafting J.B. pritzker, the governor of Illinois. This guy is more than just another heavy on the line. You got to look at the background. He showed up to camp with a chip on his shoulder and needs to prove that his family has not actually rejected him. I like JB Pritzker. I'm drafting Pritzker. I am dropping AOC Lee, if you could throw AOC up on the. Up on the thing. Darling talent, but ignored her trainer advice last winter, added a few LBs, and it's unclear if the speed will be back this season. So definitely draft Pritzker. Drop AO OC it's just so mean.

[John Ashbrook]

Okay.

[Comfortably Smug]

It's a tough league.

[John Ashbrook]

Okay, well, I've got mine.

[Josh Holmes]

Okay.

[John Ashbrook]

I am telling everyone out there to draft Pete Buttigieg.

[Josh Holmes]

Boot.

[Michael Duncan]

He is a great photo. Yeah, rat boy.

[John Ashbrook]

He's a competent scat back who knows the D and can find the hole.

[Michael Duncan]

Oh, my God.

[John Ashbrook]

What?

[Josh Holmes]

That's the direction we're headed.

[John Ashbrook]

It's football talk.

[Michael Duncan]

Dude, this is incredible. We're gonna drop that Ashbrook called AOC fat.

[John Ashbrook]

And who I'm going to drop is Elizabeth Warren. Like the Redskins, this proud Native American isn't welcome in today's NFL. And for that reason, you must drop her.

[Josh Holmes]

I had no idea, man, we were gonna be quite this offended.

[Michael Duncan]

This is a great episode.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah. Okay. All right. So what do you got, Simone?

[Michael Duncan]

So I have draft Zoran Mumdani.

[Josh Holmes]

Okay, good.

[Michael Duncan]

Sneaky slot receiver who dodges tackles like he dodges moderate positions, always finding space in the far left zone.

[John Ashbrook]

Nice.

[Michael Duncan]

I mean, that kid's the future.

[Josh Holmes]

Yep. That's good.

[Michael Duncan]

It's sad, but true.

[Josh Holmes]

I like that.

[Michael Duncan]

For my drop, I have Beto o'. Rourke. This skateboarding furry is like a quarterback who hypes the crowd, but always throws interceptions in Texas showdowns. I mean, how many times does this guy have to lose? How many times does he have to lose?

[John Ashbrook]

It is so cool that he has all these viral clips on Twitter from all these people being like, he's the man. He's so cool. And all he does is fucking lose.

[Michael Duncan]

He, like, lights so much money on fire, it makes the Democrats look completely incompetent and stupid. It. And then he does it again. He is again.

[John Ashbrook]

He is the Dak Prescott of the Democrats.

[Josh Holmes]

That is perfect. God, that's good. Yeah, that's good. All right, so my draft, I thought this was clear as day. I would have taken her one overall. I'm taking Jasmine Crock.

[John Ashbrook]

Let's go.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah. She flashes all over the field. Filthy natural instincts, colorful character concerns, and frequent locker room liabilities are overshadowed by her ability to divide the defense. Yeah, if you can keep her on the field, she's got all pro potential this year. There's just no question about that. Okay, that's Jasmine Cross. So my drop. I'm going with Chuck Schumer.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

Look, we all know he's got a big Michigan problem for starters. Shifty veteran who's trying to stay on top of the league that has passed him by. He's got tired legs, weakened, armed. He's master of the playbout book, which keeps him rock. But I think his time's past.

[Comfortably Smug]

It's great analysis. You only get that right here on the roof.

[Michael Duncan]

It's tough because I bet in his, like, heart of hearts, he knows, you know, because, like, he can try to act like, oh, you know, I'm the minority leader, and then we're gonna try to resist. But, like, day after day, you look at everything Trump has done so far. Like, we talk about the 8020 thing, but it's all working. And voters, like. Like, we talk about the CNN thing on crime. Voters are with him on the crime. Like, Schumer has nowhere to stand. His party is what's left of it, is pissed off. He clearly has to see it's a wrap.

[John Ashbrook]

I think Joe Flacco has more in the tank than Chuck Schumer.

[Michael Duncan]

Dude, I think you're right.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

I mean, yeah, you might be right about all of that.

[Michael Duncan]

And to be honest, like, I shouldn't be giving any advice to Dems. The best way they could help themselves is to get rid of Schumer. Like, you have, like, there will be no energy or momentum as long as you look at him and you're like, wait, this is the guy leading. He's like 9,000 years old.

[Josh Holmes]

He inspires no one.

[Comfortably Smug]

Who's the replacement?

[Michael Duncan]

That's the thing. I mean, that's the big question. I mean, like, Trump literally, during the campaign, was at the Al Smith dinner or something in New York, literally had Chuck sitting on stage, and he was like, all your supporters, like, wives, boyfriends, vote for me. Like, he's like, chuck, you're a cuck. Like, in his face. And, like, that's the guy leading your party.

[Josh Holmes]

Just had to sit and take.

[Michael Duncan]

Yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

A weakened arm.

[Michael Duncan]

Dude, it is so over for them. As long as he's there. Like, as long as he's there, they're screwed.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah. No, I kind of agree with you. I got one more thing I want to get to because we got a little bit of time. Did you guys see this F15 situation?

[Michael Duncan]

No.

[Josh Holmes]

All right, so it's very rare that individuals get to take a ride. Like, a tourist gets, like, the plane in an F15. And, like, I would love to do that. It would be an incredible experience. I would love to do it. My sense is they're probably gonna scale this back a touch after what you see.

[Michael Duncan]

Oh, no.

[Josh Holmes]

That we've done with this cat, Wolf. Do we have this clip? All right, so here's this guy. So what you're looking at here on the YouTube is an F15 taxiing back to its hangar with no top on and a smoking back seat. And the reason.

[Michael Duncan]

No way.

[Josh Holmes]

The reason for that is. According to twz.com a backseat passenger, an F15D Eagle belonging to the 104th Fighter Wing, appears to have accidentally ejected. It was a tourist that ejected himself on the ground before takeoff off.

[John Ashbrook]

I can only imagine that he probably had 15 safety briefings about not pulling the button to eject yourself from the tarmac, and he did it anyway.

[Josh Holmes]

There's a. If you can see the video, there's a puff of smoke coming out of the back seat. That's him.

[John Ashbrook]

He's just laying on the ground.

[Josh Holmes]

So you're looking at him. That's him. He. He was shot out of a cannon onto the tarmac.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

Presumably with some kind of a parachute situation.

[Comfortably Smug]

And from what I've read, and obviously Top Gun and Goose notwithstanding, from what I have read about the actual ejection process from one of these machines is that it is extremely violent.

[John Ashbrook]

Why would you say Goose notwithstanding? I feel like Goose is the seminal example.

[Michael Duncan]

Well, it is a seminal, but it's.

[Josh Holmes]

Standing but not standing.

[John Ashbrook]

Goose died.

[Michael Duncan]

Goose is dead. Good point.

[Comfortably Smug]

But it was a movie. And apparently it's also true in real life.

[John Ashbrook]

It was not a movie. It was real life.

[Michael Duncan]

Oh, got it. Okay. Did this tourist or whoever was in. In the back seat, did they get to, like, fly around a bit up there?

[Josh Holmes]

No, they didn't even get off the Runway. This guy reached back, allegedly.

[Michael Duncan]

Was he gonna be allowed to, or was this just like you sit in the plane while we do a little lap here on the ground?

[Josh Holmes]

No, they Were going to take off. They were going to give him a joyride. He was like a full tourist. And he got this thing. Okay, so that's a neat opportunity. And he was sitting on the Runway before they were about to take off. And you know, like, the F15 ejection handles are like, right. I mean, you watch Top Gun, it's. It's behind you. And they're like, whatever you do, don't pull those things. And he's like, yeah, no problem. Like, does it and shoots him. Shoots him out of the canopy.

[John Ashbrook]

Well, I. I. On the tarmac, I gotta say, what a goof. Because.

[Josh Holmes]

Big goof.

[John Ashbrook]

Because if you really wanted to pull it, pull it at altitude. Oh, yeah, you have a fun parachute ride back down to earth.

[Michael Duncan]

See, that's a horrible idea. So I was.

[Josh Holmes]

Now he's laying on the tarmac, he's crawling around like an idiot.

[Michael Duncan]

So what I was saying is, like, like, okay, he messed up because he didn't get his free, like, you know, jet ride. Like, I would wait until I got up in the air and I got to enjoy it. But here's the thing is, like, I bet it'd be cool, like, the ejection seat and everything. I bet that's a lot of fun. And if you do it, like, in altitude now, you're risking people's lives. Like, you don't think that is. You don't.

[Josh Holmes]

No, no, no.

[Michael Duncan]

There's no risk, dude. You can use an ejection seat on the ground. It's perfectly fine, dude. So, like, I would wait until after the pilot had taken me for, like, around. And then when I'm on the ground, I'll be honest.

[Josh Holmes]

Pull it.

[Michael Duncan]

Pull that shit. You pull it 100%. Because I'm like, I want to maximize this opportunity. And, like, you always think about, what would the ejection seat be? Like, I'm not gonna test it when, like, my life could be at risk.

[Josh Holmes]

Secretary Hagseth, I know we've discussed a lot of options with the ruthless variety program. Whatever you do, take me up in a jet. Do not take smug in a jet.

[Michael Duncan]

I won't pull it, but I'm responsible. Not while I'm in the air. Everyone is safe, you know, like, I wait until I'm on the ground. I bet it'd be a ton of fun.

[Josh Holmes]

It looked like a lot of fun while he was rolling around him at.

[Michael Duncan]

But that's the thing is, like, you gotta wait until you get your ride in the air. Yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

I don't know. I don't Know, I will say it's a hell of a show and a hell of a week, fellas. I think we did a nice job of explaining the Trump foreign policy. Like the Trump Doctrine.

[Michael Duncan]

Great takeaway.

[Josh Holmes]

Yeah, right? I mean, that wasn't really our intent. We wanted to give you a little synopsis of everything that you're gonna be reading about over the weekend. But, like, look through it. That lens, because honestly, nobody else is going to give it to you.

[John Ashbrook]

Well, and that's what we do here in the Ruthless Variety Program is we give you all the yucks and we have the fun and we have the candy, and then we can also give you the vegetables. And that's what we do.

[Josh Holmes]

There's nobody that can explain the Trump Doctrine and call AOC fat in the same episode.

[John Ashbrook]

Wait, did he call her a torta?

[Josh Holmes]

No, but he did make.

[Michael Duncan]

I think we just did, though.

[Josh Holmes]

It was. There was a. Oh, did I just do that? You may have. That's rude.

[Michael Duncan]

Can I say the most important thing?

[Josh Holmes]

I distance myself from your comments.

[John Ashbrook]

I don't think she's a torta.

[Josh Holmes]

Okay.

[John Ashbrook]

I just wanted to point that out.

[Josh Holmes]

Okay, I'm gonna distance myself.

[John Ashbrook]

I don't. I don't think that.

[Michael Duncan]

Can I say, though, the most important thing that we have done in some time is the Thank A Boomer shirts. They are live on the website. I love seeing people post photos. It's the greatest T shirt for the greatest generation.

[Josh Holmes]

I will say. I'll also say this. We may have to revisit this next week because the generational battle continues in the Menchis.

[John Ashbrook]

Yeah.

[Josh Holmes]

And the people. There are as many people that are thankful of that.

[Michael Duncan]

Sure. 99% of people are thankful for boomers.

[Josh Holmes]

I don't feel like that's indicative of the audience response that we've got on that. So there may be more.

[John Ashbrook]

There may be people who want to blame the boomers.

[Josh Holmes]

There might be. There might be. I don't know. We're going to take a look next week and see what. We'll see what. We'll see what tomorrow brings with that. Thanks for joining us. Appreciate all of your listeners and views here in the Ruthless Variety Program. We're having the time of our lives. I think we did it.

[Michael Duncan]

I think so. Absolute banger of an episode, John. Remember, folks, if you have not yet, go to the YouTube hit that subscribe. It's more fun in video. So until next time, minions, keep the faith, hold the line, and own the lids. We'll see you Tuesday. Stay ruthless.