
Lilia Pulova: Building Self-Sufficient Teams Through Emotional Intelligence Read the full Show Notes and search through the world's largest audio library on Agile and Scrum directly on the Scrum Master Toolbox Podcast website:...
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Vasko
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Lilia Pulova
Hello everyone.
Vasko
So today is success day. We'll talk about what success means for us as Scrum Masters, of course. But before we go there, share with us. Lilija, what's your favorite Agile retrospective format and why?
Lilia Pulova
For the retrospective I have two options. If it's a group retrospective, I prefer to have just a smooth, friendly discussion because the format what went well, what can we do better? Is great format, but it doesn't work for every team. Some teams, they need a bit less of formality to open up and speak up. Because we all different, some of us are extroverts, introverts, ambiverts. Depends on a day, depends how you feel, depends on your relationship with the team. Because not everyone has great relationship with their colleagues and it's normal, it's okay. So in order for people to open up, it's just a discussion. But the best retrospective is is a one on one. That's when you get the real stuff from people that when they can open up. But of course it takes some time to build this relationship that they can open up to a Scrum Master. To me as a Scrum Master, trust is the most important thing because trust to be earned. But it's easy to lose. That's why first thing I do when I join a new team, I try to build. I'm building a relationship with my team, with every member of that team to make sure that we have trustful, open relationship. And if there is anything it's something bothering them or they have something in their mind, they can come to me and talk.
Vasko
Yeah, absolutely. And I really love how you say that trust is the most important thing. And where it really shows is this. In those one on one retrospectives where we are addressing specific topics that somebody cares about, they get the opportunity to be seen and heard and we get the opportunity to create that safe space where they can share with us things that might be much harder to share widely. And then we can then start preparing the path, the terrain for those ideas to come up in the next group or team retrospective. Right. Because it's not either or. Right. Like we need the group retrospective and we need the one on one retrospective because they help each other.
Lilia Pulova
Especially. I find it nowadays when a lot of us working remotely, we don't see each other, we might never even meet in person. But it takes some time and skills to build this relationship remotely with somebody. So you trust each other and you open to each other. That take some skills.
Vasko
Yeah, absolutely. Take some skills. And the retrospectives are great because they are the perfect space for us to be who we are meant to be. Right. Like we are there to help teams and individuals succeed. And the retrospectives really open up the conversation for us to find what are the obstacles, what are the things that we can do? And talking about success, Lilia, of course we do all of this because we want the team to succeed, we want the product or the business to succeed and of course we also want to be successful Scrum Masters. So share with us. Lilia, for you to what does being successful as a Scrum Master mean in practice?
Lilia Pulova
The question I once got in the interview and my answer was like, I'm on the beach in Mexico drinking pina colada and mantima is fully functioning. They deliver good product at good time at good quality. So I think the main, the successful Scrum Master is the one who coached his team or her team and helped them to become more mature and self operated, that they know where they go even without somebody by their side holding their hands or showing them direction and they know how to get there.
Vasko
So when you, when you look at your role as Scrum Master, how do you do it in practice? Right? Like what are the things that maybe the things you're observing, the actions that you're taking to be able to get to that outcome?
Lilia Pulova
I am training my teams to be more mature in a way that I give them more responsibility and accountability and let them decide. I might present them options, but it's their decision, their choice and after some time they already know the option they have for particular situation and they know where they want to go.
Vasko
So you're basically communicating to them this idea of choice, of opportunity, but also responsibility. Is that, is that how you would phrase it?
Lilia Pulova
Yeah, I would say that.
Vasko
And when you think about our job as Scrum Masters, right, Like we're with a team for whatever months or years, depending on the state of the context, what are the things that you're looking at on a regular basis? Maybe you know, in your Friday personal retrospective, you're looking at or you have a set of things you ask yourself to reflect. What are those things that you're constantly thinking about to keep yourself accountable to yourself? Right. Like that you are really doing what you believe is important.
Lilia Pulova
First thing I'd say probably delivery. I check tickets on daily basis. Sometimes I say okay, one ticket takes longer than usually. There must be some reason associated to it. So what is the reason? And also I'm. I'm very attentive at the daily stand ups to see. We use, we do remote job mostly and we use our cameras all the time. We have them opened so I can see emotions of people to see their reactions on the situations, on some questions or just how they're doing today. Because I learned to read people with time. It helps a lot in a Scrum Master job because I'd say it's one probably one of the most important skills for Scrum Master to see this small reactions, emotions of the person to see why, to understand why this is happening.
Vasko
Well, is there any like from your own experience? You said I've learned to read people over time. So you know, identify emotions, identify triggers and so on. Is there like a resource, was there a book or was there an experience that helped you to get to that ability to read people, as you say?
Lilia Pulova
I just say I read some different psychological books. I will not be able to answer to give you the name right now and authors because I read a lot. But that helps some behavioral psychology.
Vasko
Yeah, absolutely. At the end of the day we always work with people and understanding their reality and being curious as well. Right? Because it's not just reading is the beginning. Because as Scrum Masters, we, we are not there to read people. We are there to help people. Right. And being curious about. Hey, I noticed that you were quite angry in yesterday's meeting. What, what's going on? Is, is something the matter, something we need to talk about or something worrying you?
Lilia Pulova
This ability to read people, I'd say it helps to identify that maybe there is a problem existing or there is some situation existing, and then to dig deeper to see what is the cause of this behavior and help to resolve it.
Vasko
Yeah, absolutely. And sometimes these little shows of emotion, like anger or disappointment or frustration, whatever that might be, they are the beginning of a positive change. Right. Like these feelings are not necessarily bad in any way. I mean, they could become bad if they are led to fester and grow beyond what's reasonable. But if they are used as kind of triggers for reflection, triggers for experimentation, they can become actually a very positive contribution to the person as well as to the team. Because they might trigger a reflection or a change or, or a learning opportunity. Right?
Lilia Pulova
Absolutely. Absolutely. Or if it's a negative thing, it's better to be caught at the very beginning rather than developing something big and might be out of control already.
Vasko
Yeah, catch the difficult, the potential conflicts early so that they don't grow out of proportion. Absolutely.
Lilia Pulova
Absolutely. Yeah.
Vasko
Thank you very much for sharing that with us, Lilia.
Lilia Pulova
That's my pleasure.
Vasko
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In this insightful episode of the Scrum Master Toolbox Podcast, host Vasco Duarte engages in a compelling conversation with Lilia Pulova, an experienced Agile Coach and Certified Scrum Master. Released on June 26, 2025, the episode delves deep into the role of emotional intelligence in fostering self-sufficient teams. Below is a detailed summary capturing the key discussions, insights, and conclusions from their dialogue.
Lilia Pulova begins the conversation by sharing her preferred formats for Agile retrospectives. She emphasizes flexibility based on team dynamics:
"[01:36] I prefer to have just a smooth, friendly discussion because the format 'what went well, what can we do better' is great, but it doesn't work for every team."
Lilia highlights that while structured formats work for some, others may benefit from a more informal approach to encourage openness, especially in diverse teams comprising extroverts, introverts, and ambiverts.
A significant portion of the discussion centers on the importance of trust in a Scrum Master’s role. Lilia stresses that trust is foundational for effective retrospectives:
"[03:08] Trust is the most important thing because trust has to be earned. It's easy to lose."
She advocates for one-on-one retrospectives as a means to uncover genuine concerns that might not surface in group settings. Vasco expands on this by explaining how these individual sessions lay the groundwork for more productive team-wide discussions.
When asked about her definition of success, Lilia provides a vivid analogy:
"[05:00] I imagine myself on the beach in Mexico drinking a piña colada while the team is fully functioning, delivering good products on time and with quality."
She defines a successful Scrum Master as someone who empowers their team to become mature and self-sufficient, capable of navigating challenges independently without constant guidance.
Lilia shares concrete strategies she employs to foster team maturity:
"[06:04] I train my teams to be more mature by giving them more responsibility and accountability, letting them decide their paths."
By presenting options and encouraging decision-making, she helps teams develop autonomy. Over time, team members grow confident in their choices and the direction they pursue.
A critical theme in the episode is the role of emotional intelligence. Lilia explains how she leverages emotional cues to understand and support her team:
"[07:27] I check tickets daily and pay close attention during stand-ups, especially since we work remotely with cameras on. I read people’s emotions to understand their reactions and well-being."
She underscores the importance of recognizing subtle emotional signals as indicators of underlying issues, allowing for timely interventions.
When discussing resources that aided her emotional intelligence, Lilia mentions:
"[08:49] I read various psychological and behavioral psychology books, which helped me develop this ability."
Although she doesn’t cite specific titles, her commitment to continuous learning is evident.
Vasco and Lilia explore how emotions can drive positive transformations within teams. Vasco suggests that emotions like anger or frustration, when acknowledged early, can be catalysts for reflection and improvement:
"[09:32] These feelings can become positive contributions if used as triggers for reflection and learning opportunities."
Lilia concurs, emphasizing the importance of addressing negative emotions promptly to prevent them from escalating:
"[10:32] It's better to catch negative emotions at the very beginning rather than letting them develop into something unmanageable."
The episode concludes with Vasco expressing gratitude to Lilia for her valuable insights. The discussion effectively highlights the pivotal role of emotional intelligence in building self-sufficient, mature Agile teams. By fostering trust, encouraging autonomy, and attentively managing emotions, Scrum Masters can significantly enhance team dynamics and performance.
This episode serves as a valuable resource for Scrum Masters and Agile Coaches aiming to enhance their emotional intelligence and build resilient, self-sufficient teams.