Podcast Summary: Self-Conscious with Chrissy Teigen

Episode: Dr. Judith Joseph: Childhood Trauma and How to Recognize High-Functioning Depression
Host: Chrissy Teigen
Guest: Dr. Judith Joseph
Date: October 16, 2025

Episode Overview

This emotionally charged episode of Self-Conscious with Chrissy Teigen delves into the complex realities of high-functioning depression and the persistent impact of childhood and smaller, everyday traumas. Joined by psychiatrist, researcher, and author Dr. Judith Joseph, Chrissy shares her personal experiences in an open, cathartic dialogue that puts words to the invisible pain many experience, but few recognize or name. Through candid conversation, Dr. Judith provides pathways for understanding, validating, and healing from emotional wounds—big and small—with tools to help listeners reclaim their joy.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Introduction to High-Functioning Depression

• What is High-Functioning Depression?
  Dr. Judith defines it as depression that hides behind “full calendars, flawless to-do lists, and the phrase ‘I’m fine.’” People often look outwardly successful and productive, all while internally feeling numb, lacking motivation, and unable to access joy.

  • Dr. Judith: "When you push down the pain, you also push down the joy." [08:44]

• Naming the Pain ("Affect Labeling")
  She explains that simply having a term for what you’re experiencing is deeply therapeutic. Naming your feelings or condition can bring a sense of relief.

  • Dr. Judith: "When we know how we're feeling and we have a name for what we're dealing with, that in itself is therapeutic." [04:44]

Chrissy's Personal Experience

• Chrissy openly discusses her lifelong struggle with identifying her feelings and her frustration with "blank slate" therapists who don't provide her with actionable feedback.
  • Chrissy: "I'm always like, no, man, I need to hear something. I need to hear the one little quote that's gonna get me through the week..." [03:45]
• She shares bouts of emotional numbness, only feeling deeply through her children’s achievements or rare moments, expressing confusion in her inability to feel both negative or positive emotions—an experience linked to anhedonia.
  • Chrissy: "I really don't feel much ever... It's just the greatest way of protecting myself.” [10:01]

Understanding Anhedonia & Alexithymia

• Alexithymia: Difficulty identifying and describing feelings.
• Anhedonia: Inability to feel pleasure or joy in situations that should bring happiness.
• Dr. Judith emphasizes that lacking emotional highs isn't a personal failing, but a symptom of deeper, often unprocessed trauma. She notes many therapists don’t recognize anhedonia, despite its long-standing presence in medical research.
  • Dr. Judith: "But when you can name it, you feel less shame and blame." [12:25]

Trauma Big and Small (Capital "T" and Little "t")

• Dr. Judith introduces the idea of “capital T” (big, catastrophic) and “little t” (chronic, smaller) traumas.
  • Chrissy: "I think I've only had two capital T's and the rest have been really tiny T's. And my therapist says those tiny T's really add up..." [13:11]
• She validates that all types of trauma can have lasting effects and discusses how unrecognized, dismissed trauma can shape personality, coping mechanisms, and later relationships.

Trauma’s Impact on Memory and Coping

• Many people block out childhood memories as a defense mechanism. Chrissy describes large gaps in her childhood memory, which makes her question her perceptions and feelings.
  • Chrissy: "I don't remember a lot of my childhood. I do a really incredible job of blocking out entire years..." [18:45]
• Dr. Judith assures listeners that memory blocks and disconnection from one’s history and body are classic trauma responses—nothing to be ashamed of.
  • Dr. Judith: "For many listeners who feel like they can't remember their childhoods... this is so important. Someone's gonna wake up and be like, oh my gosh, something happened to me, right?" [21:38]

Emotional Numbing and Disconnection

• Chrissy describes not feeling present or connected to her body, which led to risky behaviors (substance use, impulsive sex) and an inability to set boundaries or feel pride in herself.
  • Chrissy: "I've never, ever felt connected to my body, which is why I could always be so bad to it." [32:28]
• Dr. Judith explains these are trauma symptoms and offers hope that with awareness and support, individuals can reconnect to feelings and embodied experience.

Trauma Inventory (Live Example)

• Dr. Judith leads Chrissy through a childhood trauma inventory as a demonstration. Difficult questions are asked; Chrissy gives honest, vulnerable answers.
• The exercise shows that many more people have "trauma" than official diagnostic tools account for. By the end, Chrissy expresses sadness reflecting on how common certain traumatic experiences are, especially for women.
  • Dr. Judith: "Trauma extends beyond childhood... because some people live with others who have severe mental health issues, who indulge in substances, who physically harm them and violate them. This happens throughout adulthood too, and it shapes you." [40:22]

The Role of Validation and Support in Healing

• The way disclosures of trauma are handled—especially in childhood—is crucial to healing. Dr. Judith outlines the healing power of being believed and having a safe, supportive environment.
  • Dr. Judith: "If after an event like this, you're told it's not your fault... that gives you the best outcome." [50:29]
• Chrissy reflects on how not having a safe place to talk kept wounds fresh and internalized.

Why Risky Behaviors Repeat

• Dr. Judith explains "risk-taking behavior" as a common trauma response—especially in sexual trauma survivors—where a person may subconsciously try to recreate the trauma in new scenarios in a search for control over the outcome.
  • Dr. Judith: "Humans do this...to try and change the outcome. If I beat this one, if I’m in control, then I got away.” [48:18]

The 5 Vs Toolkit: Practical Tools for Release and Joy

Dr. Judith introduces her "5 Vs," a practical framework for restoring joy and beginning healing:

1. Validation — Accept and acknowledge your experiences and emotions.
   • Dr. Judith: “Say to yourself... this happened to me, it was not my fault, and I am worthy of love and joy.” [54:31]
2. Venting — Express emotions intentionally (journal, pray, sing, or talk—but with consent if to another).
   • Dr. Judith: “If you choose to vent to someone... make sure you ask for emotional consent.” [55:07]
3. Values — Identify and anchor to what truly matters to you (e.g., love, family, faith, healing).
   • Chrissy: “Family, love, healing.” [57:58]
4. Vitals — Connect to your body through breath work and self-care. (Dr. Judith guides a calming breathing exercise live.)
   • Dr. Judith: “Adults really like doing that, it really allows you to stay centered, and it calms that fight or flight naturally.” [60:49]
5. Vision — Plan for joy and actively celebrate small wins, which reinforces positive feelings.
   • Chrissy: “I got to open up and cry.” [62:33]

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On High-Functioning Depression
  • Chrissy (01:41): "You can seem like you've got it all going on and you can seem like you have everything and feel like something's wrong with you because you don't feel the joy that you're supposed to feel."
• On Needing Labels
  • Dr. Judith (03:05): "Validation is so important. And what you described, not having a term and wanting a term... when you can name it, you feel less shame and blame."
• On Disconnecting From Emotion
  • Chrissy (10:01): "What was the— I couldn't pronounce it... Anhedonia. Yes. Or excitement, pleasure, anything... My therapist says that it's just the greatest way of protecting myself."
• On Trauma Big and Small
  • Chrissy (13:11): "My therapist says those tiny T's really add up."
• On Not Remembering Childhood
  • Chrissy (18:45): "I do a really incredible job of blocking out entire years."
• On Validation for Listeners
  • Dr. Judith (21:38): "Someone's gonna wake up and be like, oh, my gosh, something happened to me, right?"
• On Healing
  • Dr. Judith (50:29): "Feeling safe, knowing it's not your fault, and knowing what to expect and being loved unconditionally… those are all things that heal you."
• On Joy
  • Dr. Judith (61:36): "When you’re intentional about giving priority to things that give you meaning and purpose and not getting distracted... you can anchor yourself... and feel grounded in purpose."

Timestamps for Important Segments

• Defining High-Functioning Depression: [06:00]
• On the Power of Naming (Affect Labeling): [04:44]
• Chrissy’s Emotional Numbness & Anhedonia: [09:59] - [12:06]
• Capital T and Little t Trauma: [13:11]
• Childhood Memory Gaps: [18:45] - [21:59]
• Processing Trauma and Self-Blame: [41:21] - [46:40]
• Risky Behaviors After Trauma: [48:18]
• Trauma Inventory Live Example: [34:13] - [39:00]
• 5 Vs Toolkit and Exercises: [51:50] - [62:39]
• Breathing and Grounding Exercise: [60:49]
• Celebrating Wins and Shared Joy: [62:14] - [63:11]

Tone and Style

The conversation is intimate, emotional, and validating, with both women speaking candidly about pain, numbness, and the messy journey of feeling again after trauma. Dr. Judith brings warmth, deep expertise, and actionable knowledge, creating a space where both Chrissy and listeners can access difficult truths and begin pathways to healing.

Takeaways for Listeners

• You’re not alone: High-functioning depression, anhedonia, and disconnection are common, especially among achievers and caregivers.
• Naming your experience is empowering.
• All trauma counts: Both big and small wounds matter.
• Validation and support are foundational to healing.
• Simple exercises (the 5 Vs, grounding, and value identification) can be powerful steps back to joy.

Final Thoughts

Dr. Judith and Chrissy’s dialogue is a moving testament to the silent struggles many endure. By giving language to hidden pain and offering science-backed, practical strategies, the episode serves as both a validation and a road map for those seeking to feel whole again.

Resources:
High-Functioning: Unlock your hidden depression and reclaim your joy by Dr. Judith Joseph (Available on Audible)